What are your favorite love stories? As always, if you want to support my work, feel free to check out my Patreon page: www.patreon.com/LikeStoriesofOld

Shifting from “loving who leaves” to “loving who stays” was a powerful paradigm shift I experienced in my 30s and a stepping stone to learning how to love myself for the first time.

While this is of course, mainly about Nora & Haesung, I can't help but love Arthur so much. So much understanding and empathy from him. So much trust and love. I only wish to find an Arthur in my life.

"The way time eventually narrows down the boundless potential for possible life directions into a concrete and singular reality" Damn man, I came here for film analysis not an existential crisis

My favorite part about the movie were the slow yet intentional scenes. Most of the communication between the two actors was via eye-contact and a lack of dialogue made their chemistry so much more complex and meaningful.

I think there is a certain catharsis for Hae-Sung as well. That man was broken for 20 years when she suddenly left and he hasnt been able to move on. The farewell scene and the contrast between the first one and the second one with the staircases shows that much. In the first farewell, she is high above him, distant. He says a shallow goodbye as she moves on to greater heights and he is stuck on the same path. This absolutely stunted this dude emotionally, you even see it repeat again when he finds her 12 years later on Facebook. Nora is an absolute monster, not morally, but she is selfish and ambitious and he cannot keep up, he is just too ordinary. I think this is probably why his 2nd relationship didnt work out, at least it is a speculation. In the second farewell, he finally sees that he can never have Na-Young because Nora is a different person, not blatantly but she is different for him than she is for her husband. Which is a great example of perspective and love. When Hae-Sung and Nora part this time, it is more intimate. More final. Hae-Sung can finally move on.

Not until you realize how circumstances outside your control could have changed who you end up in a relationship with, that you start to understand how much it is also a deliberate decision that you maintain and work that relationship. Circumstances might be arbitrary but relationships are not.

As someone in their mid-thirties who recently has spent a lot of time reconnecting with childhood friends, I'm surprised at how little people actually change. I think most of what we are as people is inherent, and no matter what paths we go down in life we mostly end up where we would be anyway.

I turned 50 last year and found Past Lives deeply comforting. A similar age to Jesse and Celina; I adore the Before Trilogy and identify with the over-thinking and “what-if” themes. Having spent time contemplating passions of the past 35 years “Past Lives” helped me find peace for the next 35. Que sera sera in the dance of destiny vs free will.

OMG!!! Bruh, you are the first one to speak about what I was thinking of with this movie. To me this is a marriage story (just not the disfunctional one). anybody married or in a relationship for a long time (>10 yrs) knows what it feels like when you meet people from your spouses life that were present before you, at first it's like staring at a door to a creepy basement, but afterwards you appreciate your spouse even more because you better discover the depths of what makes them who they were when you met them.

As someone who moved abroad from a younger age with my family , this movie spoke to me in so many levels even when my cultural background is different, it really captivated the challenges of growing up in a different place but still having that fun memories of the place you once call home. The husband is also an incredible writen character because while he had difficulty understanding the situation, he fully trusted her and that just showed how much he loved her. This movie was a 10/10 for me

that’s what makes the relationships we are in more meaningful. you could’ve been with anyone else in the world . But here you two are, sharing an experience together. I think that’s beautiful

Nora definitely believes in destiny, as she is set to become a great writer, first wanting to win the Nobel, then the Pulitzer and finally conforming with a Tony: She always adjusts her dreams and expectations to her reality, which is also reflcted on her love life. Great as usual, Tom!!! Thanx!!!

This film was deeply moving. And absolutely poetic- it watched like an extended haiku poem. It was so deeply moving and elegant and strangely hopeful. The depiction of the men in this film was so incredible. And Nora’s character- so quietly self assured- it was just masterful.

I don't know how else to put it, but your videos have always felt like a kind of prayer to me. I think it's because of the respect and meditation you put into each one

I think what makes Past Lives such a great love story is that it’s not about love. I would say its greatest themes are time and language. How does time shape us? How about language? There’s so much that is unsaid in the film that makes us wonder, but it also makes us cling onto what IS said.

Tying Adam and Eve in with Past Lives made me laugh so hard I snot-rocketed on my laptop.

I still feel destined to have been with a girl I took on the most amazing weekend date ever. She even told her friends of how grandiose and spectacular it was with the result of "who is this guy?!". I knew her feelings the moment she decided -- having drove 4 hours to come see me -- "who is this girl?!". The chemistry was unreal. And the moment of her in my kitchen (after having only called her voice for that entire year) was unimaginable, and now here she was, tangible; actual, alive; an object to behold, as a focus for my love to kindle and take flame; a yellow sun-dress on fire... leaning against the kitchen top, staring at me, with the sun to her back; and then nothing. I had taken a job opportunity thinking that moment would continue, she; letting me go to have that life of adventure that she felt she couldn't have, and me thinking it was a point in my journey that would later bring me back to her. But it was not so... she found another and I, still alone... draw a smile on my face, with the happiness of the alternative; the alternate me, in some other universe that had chosen to stay...

Love the idea that the film is about connecting with her past, reconciling with something she had forgotten

I think this is the best video essay I've seen so far about Past Lives. Especially that of the immigrant experience of being a kid but old enough to have had forged memories and relationships. I cried when you mentioned this in your video. I moved to the States when I was 19 so I was already an "adult" but still very much a kid, tbh. I have this romantization of the nostalgic parts of my childhood, of the friends, the crushes, the people I had relationships with (romantic or not). But then I forged my own new memories in the US and every day the romantization faded. In my 30s now and that romantization is almost non-existent. They are warm memories, sure. But I am a completely different person now than when I was 18/19, crying because I probably won't see my friends and crushes again.

This movie left me with uncertain emotions. I liked it, but the feelings it left me with were both painful and hopeful. Painful for Hae Sung, hopeful for Nora and Arthur. This video has helped me to reprocess those feelings and see the movie in a different light. Tremendous

What I like about this story is how Hae Sung and Nora finds an explaination on why they can't be together, and they eventually found it. And him leaving, knowing they'll probably never see each other again really hurts.

I think the movie is riding about the two lanes of love and identity and loss of one through the other. I don't think it's as much about the loss of love for nora than it's her struggles about her identity. Her past culminates into her struggle of realizing what her true identity is. This, she navigates through Hae-sung. Let me Explain! In the first farewell, the decision of immigration didn't have much emotional weight for Nora because it wasn't her own. AND Because it wasn't her own, the loss didn't feel like hers (of her past life and hae-sung). We don't see her under it's burden 12 years later. She has her said identity in the states, her dreams and she is satisfied. In the second farewell, we see her reminiscing her past and in that process reconnecting with Hae sung. Their rekindled connection breaks open the pandora box, the question of choice, OF IDENTITY. She's thinking about moving to Korea but that would mean leaving her career behind, the reason she immigrated for in the first place. The life, the identity she's build until now to pursue it. Would she abandon an identity she has BUILD (in states) for an identity that she has BUILD OVER (of korea)? She has a choice... to once again, leave an identity she's build in the states for an identity that is a past. And she chooses to stay, her present is her (true) identity she decides to not abandon for someone from the past (she thinks). Since this was her choice, of a life not chosen, a path not taken, she has to bear the burden of its loss. It's a struggle of 'Did I choose who I was?' 'Did I choose the real me?' 12 years later, we see her married. In the second farewell, she bets on her ambitions for settling her conflicts in the future and breaksup with Hae-sung. However, her career didn't really fill her expectations and fill her void of 'who am I?'. She is in her phase of realizations, that nothing in life can make up for the the answer of 'WHO AM I?' And now she must face it...that ambition didn't give her any answers. She is struggling again... to find herself. You see her inner conflict externalized through Arthur's doubts. Arthur is the voice of her inner doubts in the film. Hae-sung is the only figment she is left with, to attribute to her identity she feels lost and doesn't know where it's gone or if it's still there. Her questions of 'Where is Na-young?'. Hae-sung is the only path that takes or leads her to Na-young. The person she's searching for... if she is lost. Loss of Hae-sung is also a loss of Na-young for Nora. A final farewell to her past life. The final farewell for both, is a farewell to Na-young more than to each other. Hae-sung must realize she is Nora AND Nora must realize that she is Nora. This is what celine song said about the ending walk when Nora cries, “I knew that when she was walking home, she has to cry, but she’s not crying for the whole of the film. So this is the moment that she’s alone for the first time almost in the film. And she is able to allow herself to grieve like that. That walk is about the grief for the little girl that she never got to grieve. It’s not about, ‘oh my god, I wish I went with with Hae Sung,’ it’s more about the girl.”

I can't get over that this was a first feature, it's so emotionally articulate - masterfully so. What a talent Song is.

I have been in this situation. I have discovered that unrequited love is a dream, a fantasy. This beautifully discusses how the past often needs to remain what it is. Gorgeous review of a lovely film.

Arthur is so precious 😢

Watching this movie was really really bittersweet. I've been in an off-on relationship for year (we both genuinely loved each other, just circumstances), few years back, she was married to someone else (I wasn't earning back then). One day she texted me, just asking about life and I felt as felt as if my entire world was falling apart. A few days later i watched this movie. I was cryface half the movie.

Was not ready for that ad sponsor transition 😂😂

I love how in the story of them it was never shown that nora is an easily swayed and enticed character to the fleeting moment of joy and happiness of a childhood crush.However in the latter part it was shown that she too regrets parts of her life. For she have witnessed hae sung as someone who could be there for her. However Arthur is her Inyun and Hae Sung would only be just part of her life.

What a great transition to your sponsor. I've never gone from teary eyed to laughing so quickly

Are you kidding me?? I just watched this last night, bro. What are the odds? Read the title, jaw dropped, haven’t even watched the vid yet and I couldn’t agree more. Love you, bro! EDIT: insight on the film is on point. I loved what was done with Arthur, who, imo, is the closest thing to a hero in the film. His willingness is admirable, and despite the pain/difficulty we can see he is experiencing through the situation, the level of pure trust and compassion he has for Nora and even Hae Sung is worthy of high praise and inspiring.

There's a consistent visual metaphor in the movie - left=past, right=future. Notice how they break the 180 degree rule when Nora has her first kiss with Arthur? In the final scene, she walks left to farewell Hae-Sung, then walks right to go back to Arthur. You can see it in basically every scene.

The movie speaks how fast peoples move on..The male character still longs for her...The last 20 minutes is enough to make you cry because you cant go back and make everything okay...Bitter sweet truth of Human emotions❤🇮🇳(& i miss her )

1 remember seeing the trailer for this last year and I knew this was gonna be intense. This film resonates with me so much so that I had to pause it a few times as I was so emotional and crying. The themes of this film intersects with so many of my own experiences not just as an immigrant but the long distance thingy and longing for an almost impossible love. I say almost coz any of the characters can choose a different ending instead we see how the push and pull of fate and free will. So profound. As a filmmaker and actor myself, this is a gift - so grateful for this masterpiece ❤

“Past Lives becomes less about what could’ve been, even less so about what should have been, and more about what is fake to be, about how it defined who we are, and about reconciling ourselves with the way time eventually narrows down the boundless potential for possible life directions into a concrete and singular reality.”

This channel has really made me change the way I look at movies and inturn look at life. It makes me look at things from more perspectives and really try to understand things differently.

This explanation of the feelings doesn't go far enough. It hovers in the present lives of them all. To really understand we need to explore the transmigration of the soul from one life experience in time and space to another; also how we are all connected in a human soul, sub-divided into group souls, and connected in twin souls. This story is familiar to me and it is the love that holds the clue, an otherwise inexplicable attraction, beyond sexual, physical love. The yin and yang of a whole soul and its recognition of the other 'self' in this low material physical dimension, is the way we reconnect, mostly just to connect, not necessarily to live happily ever after because we also need to formulate relationships with another soul.

8:07 I'm floored by your articulateness. All these things I'm constantly thinking about yet can never put into words. Thank you.

It is one of the best love stories ever told in a movie. It makes you think about all the “what if’s” and potential timelines you could of chosen in life… such a cathartic bittersweet plot🥺😭🙌

this movie is so brilliant, i've felt invested in every second of this movie. its that special. a very well made movie.

I loved this movie. It was quiet, beautiful, and has me still thinking about it. It’s unfortunate that this movie will not be seen by the masses. Everything about this film is quality… The screenplay, the acting, the cinematography and how it made me feel. ❤

누구나 한번쯤은 첫사랑이있을것같아요! 가슴 설레이는 첫사랑... 잔잔한 시냇물 처럼 흐르는 이 영화는 다른 로멘스영화 처럼 자극적이지않지만 . 흐르는 시냇물처럼 바닥이 보일듯말듯 보일듯하면서 여운을 남기네요. ❤❤❤

For our lives to be different than what they currently are the whole universe would need to shift from the start to the current point. Nothing is truly random coincendence or circumstance. The people we meet and date is something within us that manifested it and brought it our reality.

I think this hits really close to home for me because I recently had an opportunity to reconnect with my first love and it was a reconnection that felt authentic and real. However, it didn't lead to us getting back together. I wouldn't do that. I'm in a very happy loving 8-year relationship. It did feel very palpable though, and I really felt like we were seeing each other for who we became, as well as who we were when we knew each other and we have started to form a friendship and I think that friendship is something beautiful and real, but it will always be what it is and my life is now what it is and although I might wonder from time to time, what life would be if things were different, I also love my life where it's at now and I wouldn't change it for the world. I can exist with both of these thoughts in my head simultaneously and it doesn't make me any less. It doesn't take away from anything I have. If anything, it builds it up and makes it stronger and I really resonated with this video because of that personal connection.

I can’t identify what I’m feeling from this video. The inadequacy of speech is very real. But this was absolutely beautiful. Thank you.

Outstanding and amazing review ! Saw this movie a few month ago, and its depth was shocking and shaking. Seeing this aspect of our identities displayed on screen so loudly and yet without any "speech" or message rammed down our throat. As an immigrant myself I was too wrapped up in the cultural and geographical spread of these stories to go beyond like you did but you put words on all sort of feelings the movie triggered. It really has several layers to read into. All of that with obviously low budget and a dozen of character... Enough to really get you pissed at the big budget production that still manage to tell piss poor stories

Your interpretation transcended this movie to a new level of excellence

Favorite quotes from this amazingly well-written video essay!! "... the way time eventually narrows down the boundless potential for possible life directions into a concrete and singular reality." "And while there is definitely some element of grief involved in becoming aware of this movement, and in the inventible contemplation of all the live that weren’t lived, all the places that weren’t stayed in, all the connections that were broken, Richard Lawson put it as “Past lives is not concerned with regret. It is instead a thoughtful, humane rumination on what may be fixed in personal history but remains forever fluid in the mind.” "There is a harmony to be found in the beautiful mingling of all our wistful pragmatic adult understanding, and that otherworldly sense that we are all floating on the winds of fate" - Richard Lawson

Im out here in freaking tears reminiscing about this movie through the analysis; and all of a sudden get hit with an Adam & Eve ad LOL 10/10 never cry-laughed so hard

By contrasting Past Lives with Before Sunset (a movie that was teeming with possibility and consequence), I think this video essay brings up something interesting: the decline of free will and embrace of determinism as a concept in modern American cinema and media. Free will is the core of the normative ideal of religious sin, humans are free to choose virtue or vice, and will meet a fate corresponding to that. But determinism says it is all fated, all of your choices are codified into who you are. This has always been a fascinating thread for many scifi writers, e.g. Jorge Luis Borges with Library of Babel, or Ted Chiang with Story of Your Life, Robert Heinlein's All You Zombies etc. But core principles of popular screenwriting, such as in Robert McKee's Story, suggest that characters making choices under pressure is the most dramatic subject possible, these choices all have consequence, and these choices are all possible. The determinist view of writing though suggests that the mystery or drama does not lie in what a character will do -- that is already decided. It is in understanding why a character will do something, a cinema of empathy. This was an idea in the Matrix Reloaded as well, where the Oracle keeps telling Neo that he has already made the choice, he only comes to her to understand why. And shows like Game of Thrones, Westworld, and movies like Predestination, Arrival, etc often through a fantasy/scifi lens that allows for soothsaying or time-traveling suggests that what will happen is already fixed, you can't actually change the past or the future -- everything that could have happened has already happened (also Prisoner of Azkaban fwiw). But Past Lives is the first story, other than The Time Traveler's Wife, which I have seen do this with romance. Nora will never leave Arthur and her life behind for Hae Sung, nor will Hae Sung move to New York, unlike Jesse and Celine in Before Sunset who throw everything else out to be with each other. The decisions have all been made, some conscious, many just circumstantial, the point of the movie is to understand and accept them. Quite beautiful, how it reinterprets romantic fatalism through inn-yun.

Just watched this last night as well. Can’t wait to dive into this! Some of the best frames I’ve seen all year as well.

When I was young I had a strong sense of destiny in various areas - partner, place I want to live in/recreate, type of people around me.... Now at 46 I have no sense of destiny. Anything is possible.

What an amazing analysis. Made me cry all over again with you view. Thank you so much for doing it.

Thank you for this video. My favorite movie of the year, and I loved reliving it through your analysis.

Well done, my friend. Compelling, heartful, honest, true.

Exquisite video as always, really helped me to refine what I think about this memorable film. And that ad read was masterful, the most discretely tasteful I've heard for Adam n Eve :)))

you rock. thank you for all your wonderful videos. please keep up the great work.

This is a thoughtful critique and I found it interesting and valuable. Thank you.

Beautifully put ❤

This was such a perfect analysis. Thank you so much for it. My heart is aching in the best way.

What a beautiful video. Very Nice work. Thank you 😊

Beautiful and excellent analysis thank you for this

Just watched this last night! Beautiful film, wonderful human emotions

I love the way you deliver your thoughts about this film. Your video is like a wine or a cigarette after watching that film, I could almost taste it deeper and deeper

The quote at 6:30 really hit home for me. I moved at almost 14. 14 years in one country, going on 6 years in my new country. Not as long as Nora, but feels the same

For me, "Past Lives" is Makoto Shinkai's "50 Centimeters Per Second" but if they finally met in the end and realized they have turned out to be different people after all those years.

What a cheeky and delightful ad tie-in at the end, brilliant work 🍎

Honestly, I've watched the film _Shortcomings_ and _Past Lives_ within 2 weeks of each other in the the cinema and I feel like both make a really good double feature. They both have Asian leads and they both deal with the changes people make. Shortcomings is more comedic while Past Lives is more contemplative. If you watched both, Shortcomings and then Past Lives, I feel like you'll get a whole that is more than the sum of it's parts.

Love the Sunset, Sunrise trillogy, my favorite romantic movies

Somehow this video came in the right time for me. Thank you.

Excellent script brought to us by an excellent channel 👍

All your videos are so beautiful

I’m currently with someone who knows I won’t be around next year, and I know the same. Learning about this movie is a treasure and I teared up at the concept of all this. Thank you ❤

Loved your commentary, I've just watched it yesterday, but I wonder why you didn't talked about Nora's crying at the end? I found it the epitome expression of the middle between nihilism and realism, as you said...

I love this Tom huhuhuhu 😢😢😭❤️❤️ My fave love story of the year

한국에 드디어 이 영화가 개봉을 했네요~. 한국에서는 한국말이 나올 때 자막이 없고 영어가 나올 때 자막이 나오는데, 영어권국가에서 이 영화를 볼 때는 한국어가 나올 때 자막이 나오는 묘미가 있겠네요^^. 그러고 보니 비영어권, 비한국어권 국가에서는 다 자막으로 볼 수도 있겠네요. 그렇더라도 모두에게 '인연'이 닿기를 기대합니다 :)

Great review

Well... Now I have to watch it.

Great review. ❤

Second time I cried while watching one your videos 😢

Your videos are a treasure

I was really excited when I first saw this trailer. Even bought it. Then some thing happened. Something... similar. I haven't been able to watch it fully, although I seemingly already knew what it was trying to say. This video said a word that ive been feeling, and because of that, I think im ready to see it through. Thank you.

right in the feels

This is just going to be a small aside. I just realized a delightful small touch that is in the movie by watching your video. When he is outside the hotel lighting a cigarette an umbrella passes by. I ❤NY. Nora Yu. Or whatever is her surname.

I made an internal cheer when I saw the thumbnail. Best movie of 2023 currently for me.

Great video about a brilliant movie

8:51 That part is just wow!

Brings back the memories of watching the movie "96" for the first time especially after my breakup. It also has a similar plot. Need more stories like these.

Thank you

I used to think souls, god and most of religious stuff was silly and through experience I have changed my opinion, I do think there are people we are meant to meet and have relationships with so that we can learn and teach each other, its like something that was meant to happen one way or another, I do believe life is very simple from a material view, but to those who search and want to know, answers do come, but you have to ask, answers come to those who want to know.

The transition to the ad for Adam and Eve was effective and kinda funny

A little mean boy inside of me tells me that although I LOVED the movie, it is not written perfectly. But supremely directed!

This is beautiful

It's rare for a Western film to not tokenize the male Asian lead and award the female lead to an average white guy. Bravo.

thank you

This was a nice review and look at the story. I made it half way through and decided to stop. It was time for me to experience the film. Thank you!

Not one person is like the other. No one that has ever lived and will ever live is like you. There is a unique wonder that resides in ever single person. Sometimes we have the gift of really "seeing" a person. And even rarer are the times when we see them and fall in love. Arthur was just a writer who liked the same books as she did and they just so happened to be in that same place. Yes; but more so I believe they saw a part of a eachother noone else ever has. A wonder about them...and thats what bound them together.

Well done.

This film would've made more sense to me if they were 15/16 years old when they were separated to have the sense of romantic love lost. At twelve with only one date at a park with their mom's watching on the bench, is a stretch. As someone who's lived as an expat for years, Nora's tears reminded me how I felt when my daughter's friend came to visit from my home town and when she left to go back, I felt like my past life experience, my old house and neighbors etc was leaving with her. Nora being an expat in NYC, not having the chance to speak her language etc was heightened nostalgia more than romance in my opinion.

すでに二回見た。本当に美しい映画。