Saw that on FB recently. So true

Good analogy

💯

Absolutely everything about them is fake & a lie.

Well that’s bang on!

Lie about things don't need to lol

I hear ya! 😊🤏🤐👍

And if you were raised by a narcissist, you realize your reality is not what you thought it was. Everything was lies. I don't even know who my family is any more. I think my cousin may be my half brother. Everyone is lying, everyone is covering up. I'm so sick of it. Trying to protect their imagined' reputation'.......

Very true. But don't forget that such terror may lead them to be even more dangerous than you ever could have imagined. I called out my ex and she turned the terror right around on me -- assault, blackmail, stalking and a good old smear campaign.

@@samuelsparling878 I hear you. ❤️ Stay safe the best you can, treasure the ground you gain and keep going. 💕

When we work them out they put their foot down on the gaslighting pedal to confuse us more. We need to be one step all the time. Its exhausting. I hope you are well 🙏💕

@@amandaliverpool3374 Thank you Amanda. I live in a 3 generation household. My parents are driving me, my gc sister and our sons insane. I had plans to get a subsidized apartment because my son is leaving by the years end to attend flight school. If I leave before him, my parents will tell him what a horrible mom I am. They will make his life miserable! The others will suffer worse as well. I don’t know what to do. We are all tired. We also need to talk to a lawyer because inheritance for us all is being withheld, left by our Great Aunt. On a tangent, my mother accidentally blurted out that our sons got way more. I want to save everyone but will run out of life staying here. I will do my best with my caseworker, therapist, pastor and legal aide to make well informed decisions. Thank you for reaching out. ❤️🤗

@@samuelsparling878 You were right. 🎯 Overnight it got worse. I will continue doing my very best and find a way out. ❤️

My Ex Narc always got mad that I was always correcting her.

You are calling for trouble

You are very welcome...and thanks for the encouraging words!

I second that emotion!!!! The world is waking up to the pandemic of malignant narcissism and the root causes behind it. Your contribution to this is worth its weight in gold 1000 fold. Among my siblings and I, you have helped enlighten myself, and four siblings. Our lives have changed tremendously with the understanding and knowledge we have gained. I/we CANNOT thank you enough. Dr. C is a national/global treasure!

You have also help3d me more than I can say in words .

Thank you for all your videos and advices and your understanding I greatly appreciate your work and your support God Bless you Dr C 🙏💖

Your comment should be made into a sign.

Narcs are also immature!

@@jackilynpyzocha662 when you say those words to them they get scared because they feel EXPOSED especially in a crowd

Lets add. .4.Afraid of Karma and 5.afraid of death and going to hell.. 😂

@@monaj33 Uh, the concepts of "Karma" and "hell" are two different religions though?

My Narc is convinced he's not going to hell. Of course he is unable to worship GOD. Poor guy. I believe that I am as close to hell right now on earth as I will ever be and I shudder to think he is as close to heaven right now as he will ever be.

@@pattybrown8307 I guess it shouldn't really matter what religion anyone is on Earth this day? That's a personal matter for each individual, right? How does he treat waitstaff, pedestrians, puppies or the forest?

@@THRASHMETALFUNRIFFS Karma is most often used to mean 'judgment' or "reaping what you sow", which are Biblical concepts.

Thanks for posting these notes. I was just about to do this until I saw you already do this. It helps me to remember!

coward

When I finally broke up with my narcissistic bf for good, a few days ago, I coincidentally said the same exact things to him - he is weak, he will die alone, and that he is not strong enough to hear the truth about himself. Now I am laughing thinking how that must of stroke the nerve with him! Lol he was furious, and I was just cam and content I finally did the right thing.

I grew up in a home with parents that were like that. I don't miss being a kid one bit.

Thanks for sharing. I'm sorry you had to deal with that. My ex was quite similar, always invalidating my most urgent and unavoidable concerns while prioritizing her whims of fancy, and when I tried to talk w her about it, some minor error on my part was made out to be worse than any malicious abusive treatment she'd dished out to me.

@@samuelsparling878 Exactly!

​@samuelsparling878 same with me, deflection another tactics.

I hope you're well. You've been through so much 🙏💕

My narc dad confuses humility with humiliation!

You get it.

They fear death absolute fear aging. Ost get dementia and other serious brain diseases

🎵One hand in my pocket 🎶..... something something something, 🎶blah blah blah blah. 🎵🎵 😋

That's beautiful! The Japanese have a word for this: Wabi Sabi, look it up, you'll see it means exactly what you've just said.

@@yobrojoost9497 I like to think of myself as kintsugi, more beautiful because I have been broken.

Kintsugi, I like that!@@CherrysJubileeJoyfully

beautifully said

Very liberating ❤

"Live your life so that you don't regret it on your deathbed", but I guess they lack foresight and understanding that time is borrowed. To fill your life with beauty so that you can look back and be thankful for the time you spent, instead of leaving a trail of destruction behind you.

I need a banner that says that in my living room, so that when I come in, it’s a wonderful reminder of how to take care of myself❤

The stars make me ponder God. I feel put back together, after I gaze at his wondrous stars. Astronomy is a worthwhile study. Good for you a million times!!! Laurie

Thanks Laurie.@@johncollier3175

I hurt my knee Saturday playing with our kids. Me telling my wife no I don't need anything, triggered her. Then a little bit later in the day she's saying things like "just go sit on your ass all day." 😑 and "I don't mean to be offensive but at what age did your mom start having all her problems. Looks like the apple didn't fall far from the tree on your side. "

And, it is also true that in some situations and circumstances, we do need them. Not necessarily for emotional, psychological, or spiritual reasons. But, truth be told, many do have other qualities and even gifts to offer us and others. Albeit, very often "wrapped in sandpaper," so to speak, as some people used to say in some circles, back in the day! Lol

Then hate if you aren't dependent on them because they can't control you anymore.

You do not need them but they need you and they want to make you think that you need them. That's their trickery trick. Hope, you are doing fine, Amanda❣

@@michellehill718 What kind of qualities and gifts do you mean, Michelle? I really wonder what you mean.

​@@THRASHMETALFUNRIFFS🙏👍😁

😂😂😂 amen and amen....number 1 the truth number 2 the whole truth number 3 nothing but the truth...am loving this 3 points

Genius 🎉

Right there with ya. My narc mother has cut me off every time I would call her out on her lies and triangulation and rejections. Been cast out so many times and like a fool I would go back and try to make up. No more. At 63 I freed myself.

​@@DJH979

Yes, I feel the same x

So pleased for this feedback!

You GO! It’s hard work… and happiness comes with it…

Thanks, Charmaine! Spread the word over there in Japan. BTW, a close friend of mine is vacationing in your country right now.

Managing pain and health conditions in a way that can actually help others is heroic. Kudos.

@@aaronkwolfe Thank you.

Thanks so much!

@@SurvivingNarcissism no thank you Dr. Carter.

Stay strong, stay away.

It can be neglect, abuse, or over-indulgence. However 40-60% is hard-wired from birth.

Not quite as simple as that - and certainly it’s not fair to blame narcissism on parents every time

​@markjayw666 my mother in law thought the sun shon out if my husband butt.

My late grandmother went to residential school, and the intergenerational impact was familial abuse. My mother was in foster home after foster home. I think the intergenerational trauma caused attachment disorder of some kind in both generations. Abuse doesn't necessarily cause the abused person to become an abuser. It is a cop out to use abuse as an excuse to perpetuate more abuse. My late father also went to residential school he was a batterer and probably had antisocial disorder. Not all survivors turn into to abusers. Some people survive abuses to be adment about never ever becoming like them. I have had to go no contact with my late father and my mother. I appreciate these videos, I am doing the work to heal generational trauma overcoming narcisistic abuses.

Thanks so much!

Glad you're on board. You are why I post these videos.

My husband is exactly the same as his narcissistic mother and a few other members of his family. Only nice to you to get what they want from you Can't believe I fell for him, he was always saying he wasn't like her. But as he got older I'd say he is actually worse.

@@sadie45 I’d never encountered extreme narcissism before, until (as a member of school staff) I challenged the behaviors and integrity of the school principal, in particular with her proclivity towards salary favoritism, nepotism with family members and fee discounting. It sickened me to my core that a person I had counted as a friend and had defended previously could turn her back on me so quickly and throw me under the bus to peer staff and others in leadership. The narcissistic principal painted me enemy number 1, and went full bore to have me dismissed - she became so fixated on me that she’d lost focus on craft-fully covering her own rear end which essentially led to her own demise. The situation was so bad that it sent me to hospital with a stress related illness. Thank goodness the truth prevailed, and the woman was caught out lying to the school Council. And what was the seed that initiated her bitter attack - I queried why the principal couldn’t maintain management separation with family and friends employed in the school, offering them kickbacks and favors, especially to her entitled daughter. The principal was offered an exit plan from the school, but the daughter remained and continued to cause trouble in the school (coached by her unemployed mother). I still have to experience the ramifications for being the unprotected whistleblower, including ongoing harassment from the daughter (who has also been offered an exit door from the school). The mother is a control freaking narcissist, and the apple doesn’t fall too far from the tree with her entitled and psychologically damaged daughter.

It is a ability that can be learned...

Good morning!

It's great to hear from a fellow intuitive soul. Thanks, Helene.

@@SurvivingNarcissism Well, Thank YOU, Dr C !

Hope you like it!

@@SurvivingNarcissism Today I turn 46. she took my children from me 20 years ago with the discard. She lived 400 mjles away. For the last years all my birthdays and fathers days have been without my children. J no longer celebrate either day. I refuse all invjtatjons to a party for me. Told my mother If my children arent there no party. Theyre away at college now. I will go deeo into the woods alone and find a place to cry n pray.... Until my children call me

Thank you, and thank you.

I wanna like this twice.

Speaking of denial. Any imaginary friend? Really?? If you were really strong, you would have left.

@Joelswinger34 Stop victim blaming

Me, too, but 36 years of “marriage.” 🙏🙏

Notice how quickly they become defensive. That's their fear. They don't see the fear, since it often manifests as anger.

But my N-ex would readily agree with the neo-philosopher Steve Taylor who sang "... but I'd rather be immortal by not dying."

Actually, being able to laugh at yourself can be a form of humility. Be you, Aaron!!

You're welcome