“If you’re not her first choice, why do you want to be her choice at all?” Straight fire!

I once asked a female "friend" why did she only call me when she needed something. I asked her why couldn't she call just to say hello. She never called me again. That was a wake up call. I now call people out a lot sooner.

My motto, don't expect anything from anybody at any time. Have no expectations of others.

Easiest way to get out of the "Friend Zone" is to simply... Stop being their friend. And if they ask why you're being distant, tell them. It probably won't work in terms of getting them to like you, but at least you know you were finally yourself to them.

One thing I've learned in 50+ years is that If I like them, they Don't like me. If I don't like them, they won't leave me alone.

I'm so sick of dealing with emotionally damaged women.

The saddest part after listening to this is is that you realize no one in your life actually ask you about you and actually like you.

If she keeps bugging you, asks a lot of questions about you, always looks for an excuse to touch you, and give you hints that she wants you to take her out……..I’m pretty sure she’s into you. The biggest problem of both sexes is that it’s tough to find someone who likes you back and puts the same effort.

When she finds out you have an American Express Black Card, she’ll start liking you real quick.

If SHE doesn't actively and persistently seek to be with you, she's not interested. It is that simple.

"I just think we all deserve someone who wants to be with us." - The Office

I went a date with a girl and it went really well, we hung out for several hours, great convo and banter. She even texted me the following day. She also expressed interest in attending this event that I invited her to, but was ultimately unable. We were texting a little and she was very responsive at first, then a day later, things shifted and she just stopped. I was getting one response every 24 hours, but she would also lazily volley the question back at me with a "What about you?" Which kept the convo going. Making one last attempt, I texted and asked her out again, this time she just ignored it completely. This has been my dating life in a nutshell. Things seem great, then suddenly... ghosted.

I think I am a semi-attractive guy, but rejection is still devastating. My friend gave me the best advice "Who ever cares the least has the most control". There you go. Make sure it is you.

I'm at the point where if a girl likes me, I get suspicious. I start asking questions like, "Who are you working for?" "How did you find me?" "Who is your parole officer?"

in my experience, as a male. I've friend zoned females. Only to later actually be attracted to them as I got to know them. So I'm sure this can apply to us guys. I've had it happen myself where I girl I liked, I swore hated me at times. And later, after a year or so of being around each other and mutual friends, was apparent she was interested in me. Fuck this friend zone bullshit. Just be around people you like, and things may or may not happen. Just don't force it. Be genuine.

This is actually so truth. It's tilting AF when you're into a hot girl who doesn't like you, but she instead likes another guy who is seemingly nice but is taking her for a ride and most certainly does not have any deeper feelings. It's when you realise that, that this chaotic ladder of acceptance works more ways than one. Let the fools be played, while you learn from your own mistakes and move on.

"If you're putting your time and energy into someone, you should be getting that back"

How to get out of the Friendzone: Say I'm not here to be your "friend". It may not give you what you want, but it will earn you respect for being clear about your intentions VS trying to read the tea leaves. Confidence IS everything.

I deal with ghosting. That’s how women express they don’t like me. Situation I find myself in now is confusing, exciting, irritating, hopeful, a rollercoaster to say the least.

"It is 2021 and you are no longer going to beg for a girls attention." I needed that.

1. She doesn’t talk to you 2. If she cancels and doesn’t hang out 3. No physical contact or doesn’t like physical contact 4. She calls you friend 5. Talking about other guys (bringing up other guys)

It’s really not that complicated but because of our emotions and not wanting to accept the truth we try to overthink it. Let me dumb it down for everyone: if she responds to your texts right away or as soon as she is actually available, doesn’t send short responses like its a burden, and when you ask her out she does everything to make it a priority. If she can’t make it, she’ll apologize and go out of her way to find an alternative. When a girl wants a man, she’ll put in the effort to go get it.

The problem is the mixed signs , she aways want to do something with me invites me to watch a movie, go to a restaurant, have a lunch with me ( we are coworkers) but aways cancels this things .... Its soo weird.... My gut tells me we are just a friends, but I dont wanna miss a oportunity at the same time... Its such a weird spot...

“Let’s be friends” is like a dagger in the heart

Brothers, it does not matter if she doesn't like you. The right person, who will support you for being you will eventually come around. Don't force it. Invest time in yourself and work on your goals. When you find the right person at the right time, go for it. If the time isn't right, remember to always put yourself and your family first.✊

“Not over the ex thing” This is a delicate one for a number of reasons. As you pointed out, she could “bounce” back right into his arms with as little as a phone conversation between him & her. Secondly, and I believe more importantly, if it’s really over then she is likely going to be extremely vulnerable. I always warn my female friends that this is when the snakes come out. They’ll pretend to be a friend, a shoulder to cry on, and then pull some kind of sleazy move on her. Be honest about how you feel about her. If you see her as a love interest, then give her lots of space. You can always check back with her much later when she’s healed and who knows, maybe you’ll be the next guy she dates., but…. don’t be a snake!

If a woman doesn’t reciprocate your attraction and attention to her then she doesn’t deserve your time AND she isn’t interested AT ALL with you. Being “friend zoned” is up to them and they are entitled to their own boundaries but if you have intentions beyond friendship then your choice is clear: move forward and move on. You too deserve to be happy and demonstrate self respect. Find your way towards the woman who likes and respects you and above all, shows you she’s into you. If you have to second guess every damn sign then she’s not into you. If she asks to be friends don’t do it. More likely she doesn’t want to be friends; it’s just to “console her conscience” and then she will abandon you. You deserve a woman who likes and ultimately loves you in equal measure to your feelings and intentions.

To any guy who might be in the “friend zone” here is the simplest way to get out: LEAVE THAT GIRL ALONE AND MOVE ON TO ANOTHER ONE!

The best way to get out of the friend zone is to put them in the end zone. Meaning, stop even talking to them and go live your life. I refuse to be friends with someone I even thought for a second that I’d ever be with. The minute you stop pursuing them and find other women, either one of the two reactions will happen. Either she will find you attractive because she sees you have a life and have something to offer other women and will want you for herself, or, she will continue to not give a fuck and still not want you. Either way, you’re not her “friend”. It’s a waste of fucking time and money. Move on with your life and have some self respect.

I completely agree with that quote! "Of you're not her first choice, why do you want to be her choice at all?" Now, that's painfully true and means the whole world.

Its okay to be friend zoned. When a woman puts me in the zone i put her there too. I am very clear to her that i am honored to be her friend but being a friend means limiting how much i am willing to invest. Friends dont pay for a friends dinner 3 times a week and they dont spend each evening chatting on the phone. The benefits of having a female friend are that it increases your attractiveness to other women. You practice communicating with women. You have a friend.

It's okay to not be liked by the wrong people because it makes room for the right person to like you.✌️

My uncle used to say"Just because a girl smiles at you doesn't mean she likes you"

The easiest way to get out of the friend zone: Walk away completely from the girl who friend zoned you and find another girl who will invest her time into you better.

Rejection will point you in the right direction, sometimes a set back will be a set up for something bigger It sucked when I got rejected, but when I learned more about the woman after rejection, I thank God I dodged bullets like Neo

Courtney, I'm writing to tell you that this video has shown me so much truth that I was in denial of. I have known this lady for three years and have always thought she didn't like me. I think she was only nice enough to me to keep me hanging on. I see her a lot at the local softball games and we would talk, well she would talk while I listened, but I didn't mind. We went to the county fair and she would not sit with me the whole time the band played, but then talks to everyone else but me. I actually felt empty in a crowd of people - when I came with her. I am a gentleman and walk her to her car after the games when it's dark and at the fair. Now I find out that she's going to the softball season banquet at the Legion with one of the players. Here I thought that being friends was better than nothing because I liked her so much, but I was getting nothing for 3 years. She recoiled when I asked her to dance and has never touched me once. I asked her to meet me at the local flea market this summer and I waited an hour and a half. She finally showed up and gave no excuse (oh I was talking with my neighbor and then I forgot to eat). Your video has shown me the reality that she was never interested in me and I have to let go. She just doesn't care, it's going to be difficult because everywhere I go in this small town I see places and things that remind me of her. Sometimes I think females are not very romantic at all. Thank you for listening and I have enjoyed your videos, but they have never hit me like this one did. You have great insight and I'm grateful for your advice in this matter. Thanks a fan, Joe. Ps, Today the two of them made plans to go to the banquet right in front of me, that is so rude. I would never think of doing that to a girl - asking another one out right in front of them. I must say women are rotten, they only care about what they want regardless of anyone else.

Golden rule: if a girl does any of these you must absolutely MOVE ON! There is no winning her over, if she doesn't like you now she never will.

You have to be comfortable with yourself first. Never rush to be loved, have fun & enjoy life.

I’m very appreciative of you and your videos. I was recently rejected by a waitress I have been spending time with during my work breaks and I was convinced she liked me. She would laugh at my jokes and always tell me how funny I am, she would tell me she doesn’t want me to leave when I go to finish work, she was quitting her job soon and would tell me she is going to miss this and maybe I could visit at her new work, her co-workers would tease me about her when she wasn’t around. I was convinced and I shot my shot just to get shot down. I was devastated because I am not the confident type and have never felt so sure about a girl liking me just to be wrong. It’s hard when you are captivated by someone and get turned down 😔

I’m happily married but it is phenomenal how few people ask questions. I’m afraid most people are sleep walking through life

One thing I'll say about lack of communication is some girls are just huge flirts with many guys even ones they're not interested in romantically. Just because she's being bubbly and nice and continuing conversation does not mean she's into you

In high-school, I was crushing hard on a girl. I asked her out, and she said, "No, and please don't ask me again." I was devastated. Briefly. But I very quickly became grateful to her for her honesty, because it allowed me to move on and not 'try to win her over'. I had no chance, and that was fine. Eventually, I saw a different side of her, and realized she would not have been good for me anyway, so she really did me a favor. Thank you, Annie... :)

This is solid advice and all True. Guys, Don't be friends with a girl your into though. It's straight torture. Once you are friend zoned admit to yourself it's over; Be nice to the girl but don't be her buddy. It's more then likely not going to happen and if you keep being her buddy it's without a doubt NEVER going to happen.

I doubt there will be someone that doesn’t like you. You’re a doll.

1:26 Lack of communication 3:15 She flakes out 4:13 No physical touch 6:08 Friend 7:12 Talking to other guys Thanks Courtney :)

If she puts you in the friend zone, stop hanging out with her. She is only holding you there until she is done getting her back blown out. You will only be the last resort when all the other guys hit it and quit it.

I don’t know which video to come in but I really want to say that your advice helped a lot I’m finally dating someone, she’s a really special person and she’s very positive, plus I did my best to follow everything you stated out in your videos, so thank you Courtney Ryan.

When you find out , or even think someone doesn’t like you, do not try to change her mind, move on, and don’t look back.....

Other signs: 1) When you ask her out she says she is busy and does not offer an alternative time. 2) You can sense that she is uncomfortable around you and she would rather be anywhere else. The best piece of advice you gave was the lack of and/or brevity of communication. Too many guys think they need to try harder to fill in the gaps in the conversation. In reality, she is trying to end it ASAP.

I think when I was younger, I didn’t want to accept that some women weren’t into me. If I could go back in time, I’d move on a lot sooner. My advice to guys: no matter how hot a woman is, coldness and aloofness is exhausting and you’ll always end up empty handed. You can find a gorgeous girl who is warm, kind, smart and actually likes you. Maybe loves you and then don’t mess it up. You’ll be happy.

Wow this is really a good topic at times a girl pretends she loves you meanwhile she doesn't

If she likes you, you'll know about it. If she hasn't made anything clear after a certain time, chances are she doesn't. In my experience, they just don't tell you, or don't want to hurt you.

The minute she tells me “ I’ll let you know” I just laugh and walk way. ✌🏻

You'll "feel" the signs long before you'll ever "see" them.NEVER ignore those feelings.

It can be tough because if a girl doesn't like you, she may not want to hurt you. So she will lead you on without realizing it. And of course, some guys simply don't get the message.

I just realized that every girl I talked to or had a “relationship” with never liked me 😂

The trouble is that you instinctively know it's just that you don't want to admit to it. Especially when It's someone that you really care about.

My wife, I should say ex-wife of 34 years (yes, 34 years! Together since high school) started saying to me “I love you, but sometimes I don’t like you. The first time she said it I kind of let it roll off me. Then she started saying it more and more. So I did the only thing I could do. I gave her the book. I let her go. Even after 34 years I don’t want to force anybody to be around me and I am not going to be made a fool of. Two months after I let her go, she remarried. Of course, I knew that was the problem. I wish her new husband the best of luck. Some people are just never satisfied no matter how much you do for them. Doesn’t matter how long you’ve been together, when they say they don’t like you, let them go!

I honestly do not mind being in the friend zone at all and being asked advice about other guys and that sort of thing - if the other person prefers to be a friend, that genuinely brings me happiness, to genuinely be on good terms with someone. Seriously, if I get friend-zoned, I would receive it as an honor to be referred to as a friend! Nothing wrong with that. True, I'm already in my mid 20s and have been so shy that I have never managed to date anyone or kiss anyone yet, I do seek a romantic relationship, but I don't consider being friend-zoned as a problem at all - if I meet a lady, it is ultimately her choice if she would like to have a romantic relationship with me. Love, of its very nature, can never be forced.

Her voice is so calming which just makes you pay more attention to what she's saying 😂

Women in their 20's: I have a boyfriend Women in their 40's: I have a cat

i cant imagine someone not liking courtney. im thinking shes just saying that to make her point.

Hey Courtney, all 5 boxes for me I checked off which hits hard with me but it feels relieving in a way to finally know where this girl I was interested in stands on me. I know with the internet these days it is hard to get some truthful advice but everything you said in this video was very logical and common sense base that I can certainly agree on. Thank for your help.

"If you are not her first choice, why would you want to be with her at all"....well said.

I think the worst thing to hear would be, "you're like a brother to me!" unless she's from Alabama

Oh, wait! Here’s another subtle one. If you do decide to ask her out, when you do, watch her body language, particularly her face. If she’s going to say yes she’ll keep looking you in the eye, if your taller than she is she’ll look up at you right in the eye., If she drops her head immediately after you ask her., get ready, a rejection is coming. She’s dropped her head cause she’s thinking of how to tell you no. It helps to know this so you can be prepared to take the rejection calmly and without being tongue tied etc.

So many vids on girls liking you. It's refreshing to finally see a vid that helps with the opposite. Don't wanna ever be overstaying my welcome if I'm barking up the wrong tree.

If you get the impression that a girl doesn't like you, this is actually correct. It's akin to a gut instinct and it's not something that you consciously think about. It comes down to being able to interpret subtle body language, mannerisms, etc. and then not to overthink it.

The friend zone is forever. There's no way out. If she changes her mind it's because she's manipulating you or you're manipulating her. Either way a relationship based on manipulation is not worth it.

Really good advice, thank you :) I recently walked away from someone that was emotionally manipulating me, feel much better being out of that now

If you can walk away in life and in Business and are GENUINELY are not bothered and can walk away without a backward glance then you ONLY play on YOUR terms and are in a powerful position unlike me, sometimes,in the past where SHE held all the aces.

If she likes you, she will make it easy for you. She will do most of the calling, texting, etc. If she rejects you twice, walk away!

If a woman doesn't like you it's a blessing in disguise

I enjoy watching Courtney's vlogs. Lots of good common sense and wisdom. Even hope and encouragement mixed in there.

Ive always had trouble getting women to like me, so i eventually gave up and now i live the quiet single life.

I feel like Courtney is that older sister that tries to help you out and give you tips, and they really come in handy. Thanks for the quality content!

If a girl judges you on trivial things like what and how you eat, then that’s a good indicator that she doesn’t like you. People judge those who they don’t like, and overlook the faults of those who they do like.

My goodness, this woman is absolutely stunning and very intelligent.

"shes repulsed by me, its irresistable!" george constanza

They're all "talking" to other guys. Girls are very direct when they like you and flaky when they don't.

This is all good advice - being rejected happens to the best of us and it's an essential part of growing up and part of life. Being rejected can be very funny and make for a great story down the line. You can't make her like you, so accept it. Move forwards and upwards.

I’m not wasting my time on girls like that. I just move on and forget about them.

Shorthand: (Note -- these are signs for after relationship established / several dates have been had) 1.) lack of / terse communication 2.) flaking out on commitments 3.) no hand holding, hugs, etc 4.) friend zone (meant to turn you down lightly usually 5.) Talking to other guys as much / more than you, including asking you about these other guys (she sees you as a guy friend, not a romantic partner), includes talking about exes And remember, if you're not her first choice, why do you want to be her choice at all

An attractive girl at work passing my way mentioned she liked my glasses. That was a nice highlight of my day. I mentioned it on social media as something nice that happened, and a guy shot back: “Did you ask her out?”. My reply was simple, that she just liked my glasses. Sometimes that’s all it means.

The way out of the friend zone is to walk away. If you bump into her be courteous but be brief because the more you give her the less she'll reciprocate. Just keep it moving.

Just pretend you don’t care about that girl who friend zoned you. Ignore her. Don’t reply to texts. Do whatever. Don’t give her your full attention. Keep yourself busy doing things you enjoy.

“You should not be with someone who doesn’t like you” this is some profound shit, right here.

Gentleman, often times the partner you attach yourselves to is a reflection on how you view yourself personally. If you’re not happy in your relationship, ask yourself “Do I deserve better?”.

The friend zones only bad if you stay in it. The second you know you’re there, get out and stop talking to her. And you’ll almost always grow from that experience. If you stay you’re only hurting yourself

I really appreciated it when a woman told me that she already had male friends and that she did not want to hurt me. I felt that it was a very clear way to communicate that there was nothing going to happen despite our connection and mutual experience of each other's humor. Oh, well. Her loss.

Here's a simple and quick way to know if someone likes you. ASK THEM. Be straightforward and blunt about what you want from them, tell them you wanna be more than just friends and want a real relationship. If the answer is anything but a resounding yes, walk away. Don't be upset, sad or ask them what would it take to make them say yes. Just, act cool as if it's no big deal and walk away. There are plenty of people out there. Don't invest your emotional health on someone who doesn't reciprocate or is unsure when you clearly show them your intentions.

lesson to learn about life in general.....don't expect for good things to happen.

The hug thing can really go both ways, depends on the person. What I mean by that is some people aren't interested in opposite sex friends and they don't hug because they see it as a sign of friend zone and they want either to get the goods from you, or you to take a hike, nothing in between.

Everyone just needs to be honest where they stand. Stop with the games. You are either into them, or you aren't.

The sooner you realize this, the sooner you can move on with your life. Beautifully said

Never understood women. Shit, never understood people in general. Single is where I belong. xD

If a woman puts off any vibe other than wanting to know more about you, stop caring about her or what she thinks and live your life for yourself. Make them break the ice. Make them make the first move. Make them figure out what they want fast or don’t give them the time of day. Be out the door and on to the next adventure in your life.

These five things were very well described and explained. It just does makes sense. I will very much remember these when dating as I approach 60.

In most scenarios flaking on a guy is extremely inconsiderate especially if he has spent time and effort in planning a date. If someone were to flake on me now, I would immediately ghost her and delete and block her number. Never again.

If a girl try's to put you in friend zone. Just say i got enough friends. That's not what I signed up for and walk away. The power to walk away and not care is truly the best thing you can do for yourself in that situation. It's hard.. but trust me it's what is BEST!