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One day the light bulb goes on, even if it's taken years and it's then, you let go. Once you know you go

NO CONTACT FOR 107 DAYS NOW! I WILL NEVER GO BACK!

No contact makes them crazy to get victims back.

I cut the ties of social media years ago. It was because of how undisciplined I was in my desire to find answers. When that ended I began to understand reality. If you give them the ability they will rule over you like a lord in their high castle. Boundaries don't work, talking doesn't work, rationalization doesn't work and accountability is an illusion. You will never get your peace of mind unless you take it yourself.

I have no contact with my narcissistic parents since 2017. What I learned is that TIME AND DISTANCE HEALS YOU.

Exposure kills him, the devil in disguise

After so much struggles I now own a new house and my family is happy once again everything is finally falling into place!!

22 days and counting. I cut him off completely from all social media.. So hard for me to do. I am taking this process one day at a time. One day I will look back at this and say I survived…

When I finally got out of His episode of the Twilight Zone and went no contact, I knew I had a lot of work ahead of me in order to heal. So if I caught myself ruminating about him, I would STOP and switch channels as I knew I was still allowing his twisted sense of power to affect me. By diligently practicing this process is when I got to the point that I truly began to heal. Thank you, Danish.

No contact 270 days and I remain unbothered!

No contact means peace! Really it means peace. You can´t change such a person and you have to realize that is simple senseless. Those people have a personality disorder and if they don´t want to change themselves nobody can do anything. The best is to step out (either you or them it is the best for your sanity and health).

#3 Wanting you to act as if nothing happened. If you try to bring up the situation in an effort to gain resolution, they say "that's in the past" or "stop bringing up old stuff."

My father got his wish then. My sisters say I'm evil for not seeing him on his deathbed. I know I did the right thing for me. I could see they would continue to punish me for this until I die, so I cut contact. After 67 years I can relax. Thank you for validating my situation. It means alot.

I think you are spot on! They will go to great lengths to ruin your reputation by whatever devious means they can use. All is to destroy you. They have no remorse.

Narcissism made my husband think so low of me. The man I have loved from my youth. I had to work on myself after our divorce. $125,000.00 bimonthly is evident I was so low as he thought. My biggest comeback ever!!!

Danish is correct on every single point. I believe he's the best advisor on this subject because he has suffered at the hands of a narcissist himself. He not only suffered but he survived and thrived and is now helping others. It's difficult to heal but you can do it. It takes a lot of time and inner strength to sort out the damage to your mind. Be kind to yourself, love yourself.... you are worthy of happiness. Don't waste your life on someone that makes you sad and leaves you exhausted. Life will get better when you don't let toxic people manipulate you.

As a woman who was actually sexvally abvsed by him, I think he really hopes that I don't talk about it to anyone else. He even still tries to control me from the distance because when one of my family members are in hospital or something alike, he always sends nice _get well soon_ messages to them. And he never blocked me on social media and has faaake accounts. I think he wants to keep himself safe forever. 🙄 Thank God, I found your really helpful channel to heal with you and your audience. Thank y'all very much & stay safe, people❣️🙏

Yess!!! They feel angry thinking that we have hurt and shamed them

My narcissist is my husband, I can't/wish I could leave, can't afford it right now. I treat him like an annoying roommate.

Most important for this sick persons is having control and power if they loose that it is end of the game ,they use children ,friends ,religion to get that power back

7:01 They hope you'll never find anybody else, they feel they're the best. Narc, "You'll never find another " Me, " ...and you'll never find another "

A narcissistic guy tried to manipulate me. I acted weak and he was so happy thinking he is in control. I suddenly discarded him and he is going crazy. He tries The smear campaign. Hoping I will be isolated. Little does he know I am sigma male. I thrive in "alone time". I don't like many people around me, I don't expect anything from anyone and I don't care what others think about me. Such people don't know me. The few Who know me don't even give the narcissist a chance to get near them

It's been 14 months since I discarded her and went no contact...I AM HEALING💫

The smear campaign did impact me. Behind the scenes the covert narcissist daughter contacted all the people she thought I cared about. But if they believed it, they were not my friends. She stayed with Engineer friend ruining the friendship She called and texted all crazy conversation to a weathy sister I loved. They avoid me like the plague now. And all the people she thought I cared about or advance my career. Those that walked away. No problem. They were not true friends. When you walk away from a narcissist you walk away from everything and all their enablers. You level up 100 percent from any and all toxic

Anyone else notice how... when a narcissist hates you... you can actually feel their hatred for you when they enter the room or when they're within maybe 10 or 20 feet of you? I can't quite explain if it's an energy of hatred or if it's a physical force field of some kind, or it's their glaring eyes burning through the back of your head. Even though I can't properly describe it, I'm sure it exists and it's intense.

Yes once you know you go…. Your life is worth it ❤

My experience with narcissists is that they are abusive and unpredictable. I didn't know what a narcissist was until about 4yrs ago on some websites that was for domestic violence survivers. Since then I listened to some video's on youtube that were helpful. I couldn't get the information fast enough so I suffered alot from what I didn't know about narcissists. Their abuse caused terrible trust problems.I can't say I am not helped by these videos that helped me recognize their behaviors. They also helped me get away from narcissistic abuse. I still feel the damages it caused.I am still healing from gaslighting to the ijuries they caused. Thank you for your insightive and informative videos ❤

I just realized I have gone 16.5 years without looking at my narcissistic ex-wife's social media accounts. Not even once have I even thought to look at them. Same for my narcissistic ex-daughter who abandoned me the final time 3.5 years ago. Not even once have I looked at any of her social media stuff either. I should get a trophy or something. I should get the "Danish Student of the Year" award. 😅

another thing they hope for is that you will return with hat in hand and, from that moment foreword, accept any and all abuse witrhought complaint. in addition, they will double down on the abuse to punish you for leaving in the first place. this is them reasserting their dominance and further challenging you to suck it up.

THEY ARE VERY VERY DRAINING, THE BEST IS YET TO COME, FOR ME AMEN

My husbands smear campaign back fired they were like hes playing the victim and its gross

why else do they spend so much time trying to put you down? pure jealousy. spreading gossipy untrue rumors to whoever will listen to them? because they can't hold a candle to your goodness and they hate it. hate it. darkness hates the Light, remember that. heal your Self so you can be free forever. God will help you but you also have to do your part. God bless you...........thanks Danish.

Weapons of Narc Destruction: WND#1 I asked her to leave my home. (tried to work things but, when she visited she flew into a massive rage fit, so.... WND#2 I dropped her off at the train station, let her say goodbye to the dogs home and cut her phone line (I was ...done... after the violent rage fit... but she tried to hoover) WND#3 I rejected her hoover and blocked her everywhere. She sent a flying monkey... WND#4 I rejected the flying monkey I hope to never hear from her again.

When I cut ties wit a narcissist he started to find others to replace me that he could talk mess to about me , I cut him off because I was tired of him asking for money all the time , I didn’t mind that he was full of drama because his stories were kinda funny and entertaining but honestly but in the end all he was was a drama king , he even at some point wanted to move in wit me and told me he’d help pay rent but I told him how could he help me pay rent if he’s always asking me for money lol what he gonna do pay rent with the money I give him ?????? I do kinda miss him but I’m glad I cut him off cuz he was super toxic .

I stopped talking to the narcissist. Silence for a long time. Months later, I found out she had unfriended me on Facebook. And for a few reasons, I knew she just did it recently. Why did she have to go look for my page (which I barely use, like changing avatar once a year, that’s it), and unfriend me, while we were not talking at all for months? I realized she was mad and affected by the silence treatment from me more than I knew. I can’t help but feel victorious 😄😆

After 30 yrs of mental abuse...divorced but now dealing with parental alienation

Wow, this is so right on. I am going No Contact with one of my closest friends, and my parents. They are all ruining my reputation, but I refuse to go back to their misery.

I’m so glad I clicked on this. I’m having lunch with my soon to be ex husband tomorrow to discuss our 4 children and I’m feeling like I need him to feel whole. Married for 29 years. I can’t even listen to music anymore. That man has robbed me of so much.

All the points you mentioned here, I had to go through all of that. But not anymore as I have decided not to bring myself down for those who didn't deserve me, for those who devalue me for who I am, those who gave me the least respect, who chose me only as an option for them to put their anger on, who gave me no choice of myself, my dress, my likes and dislikes, my passion, no love, no care even though i had to offer him everything he didn't do for me

Damn, I'm so glad that I was able to cut her off. I realized pretty quick what was going on after she started to play always the victim, ignoring my boundaries, guilt tripping, twisting my words, trying to blame and shame me for little things and so on. So I decided to end the friendship and go no contact with her and now I feel better. It's like weights off my shoulders. Knowing that she's feeling miserable now kinda gives me chills after she treated me like shit and didn't listened to me when I tried to communicate my feelings. Also I'm pretty fine whether I'm the bad person in her eyes or not. I'm free now.

Thank goodness i never told him where I live or who my family and friends are though he tried his hardest to find out. No smear campaign on me😊🇬🇧

Divorcing my narcassist, but his causing War during this divorce. Wants to win, so true. He is sick the bastard.

Man you’re cooking! I’m currently going through this right now with my wife unfortunately

He was a snake waiting in the grass. He told his gamily he didnt want me so when i finally walked away i was a monster and he spread such awful lies about me. This nutcase is now trying to bring flowers and get my attention. No thanks

One of my parents is horrible to me. Gives me the silent treatment and then does exactly as you said. Pretends nothing happened. She didn’t even want to talk about anything and if I attempted to, I’m “stirring up the pot” or she critically says why do you have to always bring up the past. when it happened recently and all I want to do is clear the air.

Dr Bashir your videos have been a huge help for me, thank you. Number 2 in this video was a problem for me. I worked with a covert narcissist at a job I once had. This woman would stare at me at work. I wouldn’t pay attention to it because where I live women would stare at you thinking you would come running to them like a lost puppy. Some would just go about their business and leave you alone if you didn’t pay attention to them. This narcissistic wouldn’t settle for that. She started meeting me in different parts of the building making sure it was just me and her alone at these times. I knew she was a narcissist by watching her behavior and the way she would talk to people. When she finally figured out I wouldn’t give her the time of day she started her smear campaign on me. She would tell others I was a jerk but in different terms. When that didn’t work she started telling people I was gay, a well used tactic by some women around here when you ignore them. What the narcissist didn’t know is some people I knew there would come and tell me what she had been saying. She thought some there was closer friends to her than me. She was wrong, lol. I left that job only telling who I needed to tell. Later when I seen a few of the people that used to work with they told me what happened when I left. She asked what happened to me and they told her I quit. They told me she was madder than a hornets nest and said, I was a jerk for not telling her and she would get back at me. I’m so glad I left when I did and didn’t tell anyone. She would have made my life a living hell by staying there. Instead I had the last laugh by leaving and not telling her and hearing how upset she got. 🤣

The greatest revenge I took against every single narcissist family member - was healing myself all the way into their 100% completely absolute irrelevance and non-existence inside of my entire being. My greatest success and accomplishment ever in my life, was breaking every single toxic and poisonous tether that kept me inside of their reach. There isn’t one thing they could say or do to me, that will get a single reaction, response or change in my demeanor. They have absolutely NO power or control over me, my thoughts, my strength, power or control. I’ve healed every single one of the raw and open wounds I’ve suffered from for so long as a result of their worse acts of abuse, bullying, threats, violations, harassment, oppression, torture, torment, etc. My current tensile strength is 100 times stronger than their maximum evil and depraved hatred is capable of conjuring up as punishment for me. All I have to tell them now when they dare make attempts to reach out to me - Bring it on, I am ready for you this time. It’s such a powerful feeling knowing my strength is far greater than their worse then they’re worth possible act. They are pure evil personified in human form. Thank you for this lesson 🙏♥️

Has zero chance of ever getting me back no trauma bond here. 😊🇬🇧

You are amazing Danish!! I kinda want to laugh because the one about replacing you, me,lol. My daughter actually told me that. I guess of the matriarch of the family. She even told me she thought she would be able to handle my death ( I'm 58 ). And I should get all my paperwork together for that reason. She is my only child. Jesus has me 100%. And all the horrible stress and evil things she has done are over. And I have to thank you so very much for helping me return to a somewhat normal life. Not only children are resilient. We can be too. I do miss my granddaughters but I have given them to God. Everything is in His hands. He directed me to you, Danish as well. Many blessings.🙏🙏🙏

It was the changing emotions that me giggle. First with tears and saying I was wrong then anger saying it was my loss that I lost a great friend of 20 years.

Oh, so they being nice so they can DISCARD?!?!?!! Thanks for the tip-off...❤❤....

I went no contact no contact with my narcisist. It must work this time.

I was patient. But was so emotional abused that I ended up becoming the monster in my outbursts. How long can one stay patient. But once the outburst happened from my side- even that was used against me. There is no victory against a narcissist. Letting go is the only way. We come out dirty and hurt eitherways.

My covert narcissist mom is currently hovering. But I don’t forget.

Yes i got rid of him he stole my money a substantial amount right under my nose and completely denied it. I called him out 7 weeks now since i went no contact.

But my narcissist doesn't post any things on social media.. He keeps his things in private.. But danish all you explained is absolutely correct

#3 is my mother. After years, she called out the blue using her "nice" voice. By then I was so far removed that she could feel it. She did her "nice" routine. I didn't play along. I told her bye and hung up, not giving her a chance to become herself. I'll never speak to her again. I never heard "hoovering" described but I instinctively knew what she was doing. Thank you for explaining that I wasn't crazy. 😢

O my God this is my life story right now my narc husband divorce me after 19 years..now this time struggling but i believe my Almighty Allah every thing will be fine ameen

Thank you. This will definitely help a lot of us.

Idea for a video: Narcissists and social media.

My own mother is a narcissist. I am not able to return to my hometown ever again, bec she turned literally everyone against me. May it be neighbours, my doctors, my colleagues, my friends, even her friends. Do not forget my husband and in-laws. If it was upto her, I would be sitting somewhere alone, divorced. Or I would be just her grateful slave/lifepartner substitute and money-making machine. But thank GOD my hubby and in-laws did not believer her crap. They even turned all against her and stood by my side ❤

You have verbalized what I was not able to. What an eye opening relief. Thank you

Thank you, Danish… I share share, share your videos and post them. God bless you. You are a help to many. From JANESVILLE, WISCONSIN USA

This is the bestest episode with a lot of insights for the survivors.. thank you so much Danish..you are a blessing.. keep up the wonderful service..more power to you

Thank you Danish. You've really helped me change my life.

I've put up with outrageous comments from quite a few friends who I removed myself from eventually because of all their bad and outrageous comments. Your commentary has helped me understand why one of them carried on as if we were still friends AFTER we had agreed to go our separate ways at my request.

Danish ... another ''very'' helpful Video !! I truly appreciate what You do to help so many I've downloaded your Guide / Top 10 Questions - looking forward to reading it tonight ~ Thank-you !!

Again, many many thanks for your words

I always feel validated when I watch your videos. You have such and excellent way of giving the examples and then telling the why making it all make sense. Thank you 🙏🏻 ❤

I went no contact with my oldest narcisist brother a year ago when my mom went ill ( dementia), hes taking care of her, hes been campaigning against me cause i hurt him telling him off, now my flying monkeys brothers and family members think that i dont love my mom, that is the smear campaigne against me.

Thank you Danny, each day with your video, I get healing bcos of its practical experience I had with him, thank God my kids rescued me and dumped him, no contact works well

Thank you!I watched one of ur videos.Felt like healing on the spot.took me 4years,survived.Now healing thanks to the things I need to hear is now herd.❤

all true, im thankful for this information. it helps us and others after us, thank you Danish

Thank you so much ❤ you are helping so many people to heal faster in their healing journey and I am also healing ❤

Yes! I have used that word: "monster." They're like Dr. Frankenstein. They create a monster for the system. Pity the monster (scapegoat).

Been watching your videos on TikTok for years! You're insight is always on point! Keep it up. It's very helpful.

I have learned so much from you. Thank you. Because of this . I have truely been able to move on . Knowledge is power.

Your video is really Helpful for me

Thank u I needed to hear this !!

It’s funny this video came up in my feed right after one from a mom (an “Estranged Adult Children” video) expressing all of these emotions because her “selfish, narcissistic” children went NC. So, you are 100% spot on with this.

Thank you so much for your valuable insights.....🙏

You said somehow they always know. That is the part I resonate with most, I am back home under the radar (it’s been a year) and I just had a panic attack cause someone said they thought they heard someone outside. I’ve been trying to get away from a NPD human for years and he always finds me. I’m trying hard to hide while I’m here but I know that somehow he always knows no matter how careful I am… thank you for these videos.

I agree I have a partner had a partner now and he sounds exactly like that. He has some serious issues. He’s always right never wrong and they put you down. Does talk about me and he wants me to talk about him. You are right he’s a control person, thank you, Jenny.

Thanks as always for your amazing advice

100 % Correct. !! I'm from a narc family . Went thru it all. All 100% correct . Thanks Danish .

Thank you Danish...I didn't know the concept of narcissistic personality..But because your guidance I can find out such persons in the life and it helped😊 Thank you so much.. keep us guiding

Dear mister Bashir , the more I watch your (and other's) videos about Narcissits Perverts , I see SO clearly that my father is one ! NOT his fault , but just the way it is . He fooled everybody ; including himself ! Thank you for this , I'm 57 and 30 years ago I payed myself 6 years of psychotherapy . But I never knew what ailed HIM , and I recognise all his symptoms !

So helpful this video of yours. Thank you 🙏.

Damn. Much needed. Much much much needed awaren.

THANK you for so much insight.

This was so helpful thanks so much.

My narcissistic sibling (we are both 50+ of age) wrote her own twisted story about me to a third party. A total smear campaign, the contents being a product of her own imagination, guided by her envy. I've allowed her contacting me only on family/inheritance matters. This smear episode was just around 2 weeks ago. What she wrote was so untrue and aimed to ruin my reputation that she'd deserve to be charged with defamation. The family financial matters were finally brought to an end yesterday. She wrote to me that I'm "such an important person in her life" that she would like to stay in touch with me. Now, she understands that I felt offended by her behavior. (Which has been going on for several years now, but she very probably only thinks about the a.m. incident). She's been controlling the narrative for decades. She got mad that her adult daughter (30+) once paid me a visit without her being around. I know why. We finally got to talk alone and she opened up about their past. This is exactly what my sibling was afraid of. Somebody opening up about her behavior, not covering up. I know that she will never change unless she takes her kids' advice and really goes into therapy. She was a bully when I was kid and she stayed a bully. I was never strong enough to set her boundaries. My mom was an aggressive person, so what I had learned was to shut up and ignore whatever happened. My sibling knew I'd never attack her in any way. Not verbally, not physically. I'm thinking of writing to her + her kids, telling the true side of a few past incidents. Don't know if it's wise. That will cause rage and she will again seek revenge. I'm not willing to be her punching bag and emotional toilet. It was always about her. Did she ever think how her behavior affected me? No. How my stomach was upside-down and how many nights I couldn't sleep because of her? No. Maybe I will drop a few lines to all of them and then block my phone and e-mail. If she never cared, why should I??

This is so spot on.

Thank you. You are amazing. ❤

It's in the 30th year of no contact with my former narcissistic spouse. When I cut contact I told her to contact her attorney, the attorney will contact me...I will think about it then call her attorney and her attorney will then divery my response! Everytime the former spouse tried to phone, I asked WHO IS THIS, then I would repeat the chain of communication then slam the phone down...this happened about a dozen times before I relocated a 1000 miles away & changed my number! This is the only way to live with her! After ther separation when she insisted on me continuing to take her to dinner etc., I told her to go get a boyfriend because I will no longer be HER YO-YO!

Thank you again.

When we fled and went no contact with my mom and her boyfriend, I still worried she was a victim too. It took time to see she was a narcissist too. She was hopeful I would feel shame abandoning her and tried to make me feel bad for her. I did not. I don't know what kind of smear campaign she is doing but I know she won't admit what they did to us. The two times she's tried to contact me it was like she tried to pretend none of it happened and that told me I was right both times to not connect again. I used to say I'd never reconnect as long as she was with her narcissistic boyfriend but honestly I don't want to reconnect at all. I cannot live with that stress on me again. I hope they are suffering because we are free and happy.

Very insightful

Excellent!! All true in my case!