HOPELESSNESS. That’s the worst symptom for me. Existential dread, there’s something not right about life and I can’t explain it, I’m just not supposed to be here, but my family selfishly keeps me here.
@--__--.10 ай бұрын
I'm just here for my family. I love them , only thing I know is real is my mom and sister's mind would be blasted to million pieces if I die.
@djomegaminus10 ай бұрын
HOLY SHIT DID YOU HIT THE NAIL ON THE HEAD FOR EVERYTING IVE BEEN THINKING!!
@rebbekaoliveira10188 ай бұрын
I fiel the same...sometimes, like today, I don't wanna be here, but my family is so unaware about me that they don't even have an idea about how I feel
@jeremyliddelow7 ай бұрын
Thank you for sharing. Yes, hopelessness, having no purpose to your life, and a horrible emptiness that you carry everywhere you go. I was diagnosed at 49,so I find out that half of my life was absorbed by my undiagnosed adhd. And worse, I had no free will to choose what I wanted in life, both short term & long term I couldn't plan or design which direction I wanted to go. All my energy was sucked out of me as I tried to cope with the symptoms. I didn't know why I was so fanatical about routines and structure, why I felt i had no choice and unconsciously followed the same script, inept to change my irrational, and hard wired routines. I'm 53 now and worse than I was pre-diagnosis. I've been condemned to sort it all out in my "Dark Night Of The Soul". It's too complex to explain over text, but there's heaps online of course. My love and best wishes go to you. Try to stay healthy please?
@jackjohn60637 ай бұрын
Noones an accident, God has a purpose for all of us. He put you her
@obara73662 жыл бұрын
This made me cry so much. It made me feel so seen and validated. I am on my 3rd attempt at college and I already flopped my first semester. I've had 8 suicide attempts and 5 alone in theast 2 years. I used to like how creative my ADHD made me, but I'm so sad an tired now. I've wasted so much money and time. I feel like a waste of space and resources. I'm so tired...
@HelpForADHD2 жыл бұрын
Hello Obara, I understand that you are tired, what you have described would make anyone feel physically and emotionally tired. You are valuable and we need you here with us, even on the days that you might feel like a waste. You are not a waste; you are valuable just as you are. Give CHADD's helpline a call, Monday-Friday, 1-5 p.m. ET, at 1-866-200-8098 and talk with one of our health information specialists. We will look for resources near you to help with ADHD treatment and educational support in college. I also suggest contacting the Suicide Prevention Lifeline, any time of day or night, for help in finding a therapist or doctor who can help you where you are now. Call them at 1-800-273-8255. If you are worried that you are considering suicide or harming yourself, call them right away, at 1-800-273-8255. There is someone right now waiting to talk with you and support you. Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-8255 suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ Best wishes, Karen - CHADD’s National Resource Center on ADHD
@bengrimm6222 жыл бұрын
Im 40. I have spent the last 20 years going to doctors. They all told me to go fuck myself. Dont bother calling the hotline below. It will just drain you more. If you cant afford 800 per month for health insurance you will NEVER get help. Fuck this country. Move to Canada.
@bengrimm6222 жыл бұрын
@@HelpForADHD All those hotlines are so cold. Its basically like telling someone to fuck off. I have zero respect for people who pass those numbers around. Most of them dont even work anymore.
@bengrimm6222 жыл бұрын
If you call a suicide hotline...best case scenario is they lock you up.
@crnkmnky2 жыл бұрын
I didn’t feel seen in this podcast, but I feel this comment. I feel like a child stuck in a 37 year old body. I somehow graduated from a prestigious prep school, only to drop out of 3 universities. My parents are immigrants who survived civil war and so much adversity to build a life for me, and I can barely keep a job. My dad keeps threatening to throw me out, and I‘m afraid that I’d rather just sink than find the energy to swim. I finally realize _all of my dreams_ are possible, if I can only manage my time/space/motivation to actually achieve them. I just saw an ad for a nootropic delivery service, which is hopefully more effective than Axxx Clinics. 🤞🏿 *Obara, you are not alone.* Please don’t give up yet. _(this is my second time coming across your channel. 👋🏿 )_
@sarahfairchild399 Жыл бұрын
As a neurodivergent person my self shame is the kicker! I am always masking to "save face" or "fit" into societal expectations. It's so draining. Not wanting to inflict that kind of pain on others are what keeps me here not a concern of my own pain but not gonna lie. It's difficult. Switched to a gratitude mind set and don't allow weapons in my home because that would make it way to easy. Then guilt for passing these things onto my children meaning ahdh, anxiety and depression. It is comforting that I understand their struggles more so we really do support each other that way. Awareness and acceptance on a societal level is what needs to be more prevalent for sure but for all things. We aren't ment to fit in a mold so why do we live that way?? There's beauty in diversity so I really don't understand the fit in a box perspective. Sigh.
@LydiaHess-uv1bl2 ай бұрын
Dang when he said that fear of pain is a big factor of why we don’t commit suicide it hit me hard. If I wasn’t so scared of pain I would already be gone
@amandameyer3249 Жыл бұрын
Thank you for hosting this discusssion on ADHD and suicide. I appreciate that no background music was added, as many of us with ADHD find it distracting. However, I found the interviewer's vocalizations while the speaker was talking tremendously distracting. I very much appreciate this conversation, and it is my hope that everyone can focus on the content of this fantastic video. I'm only offering this input to let you know that, at least for some of us (my ADHD symptoms happen to be severe), there is a technical issue that is preventing us from absorbing content that has the potential to be some of the most important and salient that we can find in relation to ourselves on the internet. Again, I very much appreciate and thank you for undertaking the work and resource expenditure necessary to create this video, and I thank you for your consideration of my input, whether accepted or not, in the creation of future content.
@HelpForADHD Жыл бұрын
We're glad that you overall enjoyed the podcast. Thank you for sharing your observations on the interviewer. We will keep this in mind.
@MattSaysHello2 жыл бұрын
Thank you for exploring this connection. As someone who works for a mental health charity here in the UK and who has ADHD, I really appreciate your work on this.
@saigakiragami3 ай бұрын
My wife is my only reason for living. Existance is pain and I cant stand fucking people and society, especially my own family sometimes. Some days are better than others. Alot of times I feel like exiting and I have nothing to ease the pain and anxiety except for substances. Holding down a job is a big struggle. The future is really scary.
@TrixieTaylor-bn6dw7 ай бұрын
Executive function issues, Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria and shame is so hard.
@doughartley35135 ай бұрын
I agree… these are all really hard. Of the three, I don’t know which one is the hardest to deal with. Shame , seems to me behind much of them. Which is hardest for you?
@bobbyjuju7442 Жыл бұрын
A lot of times people will assume that the mistakes I commit are due to memory lapses, but this is only partially true. I worked for my former employer for a month: The employer never paid me, and his failure to pay me has in a way made me feel like I'm the one who has failed. I'm currently homeless and couch surfing at a friend's place. My friend asked me to go get an LED light bulb and sent me a picture of the type he wanted. I went out to look for the light bulb at my local department store, and I ended up buying the incorrect one. I knew that what I was buying wasn't guaranteed to work, and that some of the other ones would definitely work, but the shame of being financially drained made me take that risk, instead of just saying, "Hey, bud! Could you help me out with buying this?" The light bulb didn't work, and I ended up feeling stupid on top of feeling ashamed about my financial situation. As others have pointed out, executive function issues are just one aspect of ADHD; shame/the Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria that often comes with it, is another, and it explains a lot about the "stupid decisions" that people with ADHD make. Thank you for making this video. I'm doing really bad right now, and it feels nice to feel seen.
@Luso1221 Жыл бұрын
That's also a fear of mine: when someone tells me what to do I worry I am not doing it right, even after being instructed in detail.
@TrixieTaylor-bn6dw7 ай бұрын
Executive function issues and Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria sucks.
@Seamannon7 ай бұрын
I'm so sorry, that really sucks... I feel you, I'm in a similar place in life. I frequently get the feeling of being utterly useless and hopeless, like there's nothing to live for or to even look forward to in the potential future, like there just isn't any future for me since I already don't really have a space for myself to live and feel safe in, so that I could build a better future for myself on that foundation... Sometimes it takes a few hours for me to get back to a better state, sometimes days, but I usually manage to get better somehow, especially when I'm able to get some sleep or a good meal, then I can be grateful for that and then I remember that my condition was worse in certain periods of my life, that I have been sick and injured and in more extreme physical danger, or desperately stuck in all kinds of abusive situations and that those situations usually forced me to focus on just one single thing ahead, like recovering health, getting some pain relief or getting away from a person or place... so being able to despair about multiple things at once and feeling overwhelmed by it already feels like a privilege I didn't have in certain situations, so then I have to be grateful about the injuries that are healed up now and about the pain that I don't have to suffer anymore, even though it was so familiar before... It's such a weird thing to look at my own body and be amazed about a finger that I can move normally now, with a scar that is almost invisible if I don't intentionally stare at it, as I remember not being able to use it for months and being in severe pain using my hand for a few years and even having a couple of instances where I thought I'd loose it forever and that I'd never be able to do a lot of things that were very important to me anymore, trying to cope with that strange grief and so on... and then snapping back to my current reality with a fully functioning hand, without any particular ongoing pain at the moment, being able to do simple tasks like holding a pen to write or even write this comment more easily and remind myself of how grateful I am for that. Same goes for my legs - being able to walk at all is already a blessing, even if my legs are weakened, prone to injury and pain, maybe not in the best state they could be, but still... I'm so grateful for being able to use them now, I don't take it for granted anymore, and when I slip into forgetting about it and being absorbed by some other overwhelming issue, I do my best to check myself and remember how lucky I am for having the current mobility, because it's already an improvement from where I've been even 3 years ago... Details like these help me to get myself back on a more positive mental spiral... and writing comments like this one, where I can relate to someone else's experience and hopefully make them feel even a tiny bit better in their struggles, by sharing my own story or sometimes just a few words of encouragement in some cases, or maybe some advice if I have anything regarding a certain topic... things like these, these tiny bids for connection with random strangers, completely unique each time, also help in many ways, although it's difficult to explain why, or how this would be productive in any way, especially when asked by someone who probably never experienced complete despair before. People who didn't get to that point of hopelessness in their own lives, wouldn't get it and people who have experienced those feelings and came to terms with them, don't really need an explanation, they just know, they relate. Don't despair my friend, I believe in your ability to figure things out for yourself, even though I probably never met you before. I'm sure there's something to make you feel better and get back on track for whatever project you focus on. Focus first on what would bring you relief at this moment and keep doing that until you find a bigger task to handle that will bring you satisfaction or a sense of acomplishment. These are words that I often wish to hear from somebody else, so I'm giving them to you. Maybe you need them too at this time? Best wishes to you! :)
@garlicgalore2 жыл бұрын
This is an excellent overview of the deep seriousness and impact of ADHD. Thank you. I am, however, disappointed in the final minutes where it is implied that mindfulness, CBT, and other skills can treat ADHD. My experience has been medication is needed first to address the executive function impairments so the skills can be implemented. This is so, so important!! Learning skills but not being able to implement them because the brain is just not able to perform leads to greater and greater hopelessness and shame. It is a disservice to those of us with ADHD to imply that skills are enough of a treatment, and teaching skills without addressing the underlying brain imbalances can take suicidal problems over the edge.
@motasimalfadni30112 жыл бұрын
Medication is needed first, I totally agree.
@phoebe75342 жыл бұрын
Yes!!!
@BlessedGJ Жыл бұрын
Sounds like what I was telling my husband. Although my words were more like “ I know what to do I just can’t do it. Stop telling me a solution and just listen to me.” With the medication I can implement what I know rather than letting it go to waste which helps me to keep a constant dose rather than only depend on the medication and keep increasing the amount to the point that it doesn’t work anymore. He thinks taking the medication is just looking for the easy way out, I think of it as a win win for me and my boys. They deserve a mom who is the present and not anxious or depressed. They deserve stability in joy and so do I.
@radyanthunapo5369 Жыл бұрын
Absolutely spot on
@garlicgalore Жыл бұрын
@@BlessedGJI'm glad you notice benefits and do what's best for you and your children! I didn't get a diagnosis until after my three daughters were grown, and I wish they could have had a calmer mom. It is always good for everyone when we can manage our health to our best functioning. ❤️
@cayman4014 ай бұрын
its weird, when im dealing with a bad day with ADHD and these thoughts come up... its not that i want to do it, its like... a hyperfocus on planning it, how would I do it, how would i make sure i didn't leave a mess, how i would make sure my body is or isn't found, where i would get what i need for the various methods. Its like im writing out instructions for a model kit or something just that... instead of making a model ship im.... well... I mean im having the usual thoughts, I suck, my issues are just my inability to manage myself, everyone else has problems and can succeed so clearly I just suck... all my friends dont actually like me and just keep me around because im sometimes useful.
@CarolynMatyjanka7 ай бұрын
In Canada, we'll likely have easy access to MAiD come March this year! Yay us! 😢
@gregoryjoesphziegler64542 ай бұрын
Awesome thank you
@Drik81b4u Жыл бұрын
Thank you
@carmen_135 ай бұрын
ain't watching all that
@ghostATK4 ай бұрын
fr wtf ?`???? give me tldr lol
@willmartin-7 ай бұрын
I believe if you are thinking of suicide then pain does not really deter you. It only hurts if they survive. I would think that a 100% definite outcome would be more of a concern. Imagine waking up after failing and being in a wheelchair unable to move. That would be much worse than the pain during the act.
@Dame28 Жыл бұрын
😔
@amani7724 Жыл бұрын
Same bro don’t trip man . Keep trying and I’m saying this knowing I have to practice what I’m preaching to you ❤️
@kora824092 ай бұрын
❤
@Thatsmantas7 ай бұрын
I feel like a rock is stuck in my throat hearing this. Probably you know what I mean
@Seamannon7 ай бұрын
I think anyone who comes accross your comment underneath this particular video knows exactly what you mean ;) I think there's more of us, you're not alone. We can't be entirely hopeless as long as we still look for answers, right? We're still here, searching... It's obviously not the best time in our lives if we are here, meeting at this particular point, but there's still enough energy left to doomscroll and sometimes even leave a few words behind, so ther's still some hope... Who else can relate?
@bengrimm6222 жыл бұрын
They more or less banned ADD drugs in the US.
@crnkmnky2 жыл бұрын
why are you always so grimm, Ben?
@messybuttons752510 ай бұрын
This is not true. USA has more access to stimulant medications compared to many other western countries.
@Seamannon7 ай бұрын
@@crnkmnky why do you identify as a cranky monkey? ;)
@jamesdoolittle5756 Жыл бұрын
It’s a struggle to stay focused on what us being said by nature of the topic. Your uh huhs are a serious distraction.