Perfume situation: I think we keep forgetting that his new wife spent their wedding night at her mother's. That's not a "rock and a hard place" action, that's a deliberate sign of her choosing her mother. There were several people at the wedding, the mother didn't have to go get the new outfit herself. Amazon also does same-day delivery. There were so many solutions that weren't even considered because it seems like the groom's comfort was not a priority.

Story 2: not having an allergic reaction trumps LITERALLY EVERYTHING ELSE. If he was a guest I'd say he needed to make his excuses and leave, but he's the GROOM. Without him there there's literally no wedding! I don't care if the MotB felt awkward or the bride felt torn, he shouldn't have to sit outside his own wedding while the person causing his allergies is inside having a great time. Go home (or to a hotel if that's too far), have a shower, change your outfit, hell if you don't have another outfit ask some guests who are roughly the same size if they brought a spare. It's not that hard. At the VERY least *she* should have been the one sitting outside so the GROOM COULD ACTUALLY ENJOY HIMSELF. The bride and her mother suck *so* much. The fact that the bride then stayed with her parents on their wedding night is just a cherry on top of her own selfishness.

Story 2: Health over "perfect day", 100%! My own mother would've offered to shower/change if she had seen the incredibly bad reaction her parfume had done. I don't care what she's wearing, allergic reaction is a dangereous thing AND it ruined the wedding day of THE PERSON GETTING MARRIED. Like take a photo with your mom and have her change outfit (and if she didn't want her mom to go for a little time… like are you really going to spend allllll night with her? Don't you have family and friends to greet? It's your wedding, you can just ask to wait for the cake etc)

As someone super sensitive to certain scents, they give me a migraine, the bride and her mom were absolutely in the wrong. Allergies can be debilitating and their attitude is really off putting, especially when the day should be about the bride and groom, not the bride and her mother. The post even says she usually doesn't wear perfume, so why pick the wedding as the day to wear it when he has had reactions in the past?

The second AITA made me think... I'm getting married in 2024 and get migraines from perfumes, is it acceptable to ask people to refrain from wearing perfume to the wedding?

Perfume story: NTA. Of course it wasn’t the MIL’s fault because she didn’t know it would happen, but MIL needs to change so that the groom can enjoy his own day. Unless she drove hours away to get to the wedding and arrived in her wedding outfit, there is no excuse for her to stay and continue wearing that outfit. If she had absolutely no way to change clothes, she needed to be the one staying outside. And I can’t believe she didn’t feel that way when she saw how he was reacting to her perfume. Did she (and the bride) really think her presence was more important than the health of her daughter’s new husband?? Groom didn’t do anything wrong. I can’t believe the bride was mad at him and stayed with her parents that night. What was he supposed to do?

That 2nd story with the perfume...yeah...the wife was the AH. Her mother coulda come back in jeans and a t-shirt from that thrift shop and every single person would have thought she was the hero saving the day. Not a single wedding photo would have been ruined because MIL would have looked like the most gracious and resilient person on the planet. On your freaking wedding day, your spouse shouldn't be choosing anyone above you unless it's a matter of life or limb and this wasn't that. Total fail on bride and MILs parts.

The ten year old child performer really got me hahaha! This child has obviously gained a sense of entitlement that they are the star and everyone wants to see them perform at every opportunity, which is clearly not the case. I would like to know which previous wedding this little diva was allowed to perform at (which relative was it?) If anything, a reality check now, when she's ten, will do more good than indulging her and her finding out later in life that she's only got potential.

For the perfume allergy one, that one is so difficult. I still think they should have tried attempting to get MIL a new dress or outfit. That does however depend entirely on how far away from the nearest store they were. It was an unfortunate situation and I hope the couple can laugh about the situation later on.

I feel like if it was the bride having the allergic reaction to her MIL's perfume, and she had no options but to spend most of her wedding outside with her bridesmaids because the MIL wouldn't or couldn't change, and the husband didn't join her, and then left to spend the night with his parents, people would be even more irate. The OP was totally NTA, and at the very least, the wife should have spent her wedding outside with her new husband rather than away from him. And that she left him on their wedding night over a health issue is sad.

For the second one, I don't think that the groom would have suggested MIL finding an alternate outfit if it wasn't a feasible option. Also, I do kinda understand why people have a problem with the wife, too. It's the groom's wedding, too, and he should be able to enjoy it. It's also supposed to be a celebration of their love and commitment to each other, and basically declaring each other to be their number 1 priority. Instead, she prioritised her wants and her mother's presence over her new husband's legitimate health needs, and that's not exactly a great start to their marriage - if anything, I'd say it's a red flag (a small red flag, maybe, but a red flag nonetheless). I get that weddings are emotional, but MIL should have left for a bit to get changed and the bride should have sucked it up and asked her mum to change even though it'd mean she'd miss part of the reception, because her groom's ability to breathe is far more important. I don't want to jump on the 'divorce' bandwagon because there must be some love there and some level of compatibility if they decided to get married, but I don't think the bride's choice is going to bode well for their marriage, let alone her audacity to be mad at him for trying to not have an allergic reation at their wedding.

8:01 “whether you agree with me or don’t disagree with me” 😂 got it👍 Love your humor and energy ❤

Why didn't they just ask one of the groomsmen or bridesmaids to go and buy a new dress for the mother in law?

Sorry, but for the perfume story, the wife is DEFINITELY the a*hole. Not for wanting her mother there, but for being mad at her husband for not being able to breathe. Her spending the night at her parents house was immature and childish. Your husband literally couldn’t breathe at his own wedding and you didn’t care not one bit. That’s a red flag and selfish. Not for wanting her mom to stay, but for her literal lack of care for the man she was marrying. She wasn’t marrying her mom. She would’ve been okay if her mom left for an hour or so to change. People are so weird…

Am I the only one having sound issues? It's very distorted to me

I don't normally enjoy AITA videos from non-reddit-focused channels, because, well, if I wanted to read these posts, I'd just check out the subreddit. BUT, I do very much enjoy them from you, because you actually tie in good, practical wedding advice and etiquette into your responses, which remains on point for the goal of your channel. It also keeps things entertaining for those of us who are finally past the need of your usual wedding planning advice and gives us something to keep in our back pockets if or when we find ourselves in a position of supporting friends and family getting married who might be going through awkward situations. I say keep'em coming!

Yay you did another one of these! My day is made! Story 1: Sara should take it up with her boyfriend, not the bride, holy moly. Story 2: No Assholes Here and I feel bad for everyone. Story 3: Oooof jeez, this poor kid is getting set up for disappointment later, are her parents crazy???

Number 2 is why you have to be very careful when applying anything scented.

Story 1: Sara is definitely TAH for trying to dictate someone else’s wedding. Bride is also kinda an AH for how she responded. She had me at the first half but the part about her brother breaking up with her was not classy and was uncalled for. Story 2: groom is not the AH, wife and MIL are TAH. A person’s physical health comes FIRST, especially since it’s the groom. Changing clothes is a minor discomfort compared to missing out on YOUR OWN WEDDING DAY.

Story 3: At my wedding (nearly 1 year ago) my husband's family all got super excited and did lots of games and performances without telling our wedding witnesses beforehand (as we told in our invitation) and though it was really done out of love (it was the first wedding in the family in our generation; my husband's siblings and cousins are all long-time single and we're all around 30 or older, so the last wedding was decades ago) and I liked all of it: It took HOURS. German weddings are much longer than American ones (our reception was 12 hours, not counting the 75 minutes-ceremony) but still, I would have liked to enjoy more of my beautiful venue when it still was daytime and talk to more guests. I think that a wedding reception is most often too short for the couple so it's not right to take away more of their time - especially if the child doesn't do it for the couple but because she wants to perform. That is just selfish.

There's a lot of echo

I absolutely LOVE your AITA videos!!! 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 In a way it makes me feel better about having an intimate nuptials day with immediate family!

For some reason, the audio quality in this video is much worse than most of your videos jsyk!

Audio isn’t good.

So I absolutely love these videos. Both because I feel like they help prepare me for things that may come up that I wouldn't be prepared for otherwise. But mainly I enjoy the wedding tea and all the spicy comments that come with. Please continue to do these from time to time!

For the first story, if I were the bride, I would set up a public Facebook post that made it clear if I had to choose between the bridesmaid and the brother, the bridesmaid wins. It would end with an Olive branch about seeking a reconciliation that would restore the brothers invite.

Story 2. I'm with you, no ones TA, it's hard. I have severe asthma and I can't be near people with any kind of perfume or body spray or anything. I'd be literally dying and wouldn't know what to do. I'd say for the future just make everyone aware of any allergies before had, as you never know what reaction you might have.

I wonder what was in that perfume! 😅

For the first story, if I were the bride, I’d ask Ms. CrazyPants to go out to brunch with me and try to have a civil, in-person conversation. I’d observe her behavior and see how volatile she became when I explained that it was one of my best friends and regardless of ex status, she’d be in my wedding. I’d say that I understand if that makes you uncomfortable and if she didn’t want to come maybe that would be for the best but I wasn’t changing my bridal party. If she blew up in person, I’d fully remind her invitation. Second story: If you’re having a huge allergic reaction at your own wedding, you’re not an a-hole for trying to fix it. It’s just an unfortunate situation. 3rd: Tell that little girl no lol. I own a wedding venue. (We live on a farm and have a beautiful wedding barn, so I see a lot of weddings)TRUST me, No one wants to see that lol!!!

The perfume one is so sad 😭😭 sorry but I’d choose my husband on our wedding day/night over anyone else, she should’ve just changed clothes, heck put a pair of jeans on who cares over the poor man’s HEALTH

Jaime, I have been watching your channel in preparation for my engagement...and me and my partner just broke up... I am devastated... but these kinds of videos make me smile and feel better

I LOVE this series! It's so great to hear your opinions as someone who has more experience dealing with wedding situations.

Love this series but it seems like the audio is a little off.

Love your reddit reaction vids Jamie!! Although the audio seems to be a little funky on this one…? But Please keep makin these! :)

We need more of these videos. Please post these more often!

As someone with a lot of allergies, when I’m the guest and keep sneezing and have watery eyes, I tend to keep it in. But if an event was about me, and I was too busy dying because someone, for whom the event is not for, wasn’t trying to be accommodating to me. I would cry. Edit: that person clearly doesn’t care about you, only themselves.

Would it be possible to please add timestamps for these in the future? 😊

This is why I so rarely wear perfume, you never know whose day you’re going to ruin just by being too close for too long (like sharing an elevator for a few floors). Bride should have been more understanding, he can’t control having a negative reaction to something. If I was the MIL I would have insisted on changing and coming back. The groom is more important at the wedding than the mother of the bride, there’s no way you can argue otherwise. NTA, bride needs to support her partner better. While I feel for the bride, her response of spending THEIR WEDDING NIGHT at her parents’ house makes her the AH, hands down.

imagine a child doing a mediocre performance that’s longer than your wedding ceremony, all because her parents can’t set reasonable expectations 🤦🏼‍♀️

13:00 I'm, i'm worried that this is a bright problem, not a mother-in-law problem. Given the groom's allergies, how did the mother of the bride who was also made of honor end up sprayed with perfume like that in the first place? Either the bride failed to warn her mother off heavy perfume or the bride is supporting her mother after defying her safety requests. In either case the bride is an a h and not ready to be married.

I need more of these videos more often

Photos were taken. MIL could change now and it would make a fun story when people look at the wedding photos to see her in a different outfit. If my son's bride had a bad reaction to anything I had on - I am allergic to many perfumes getting instantaneous migrains and I can love the scent - I would have washed myself as completely as possible and stayed away from her yet within sight. If this had happened at my son's recent wedding, it was a long way from the wedding and the reception from the hotels. I would have begged to switch dresses with someone or looked for any kind of outfit change.

As a migraine bride, I am very worried about the fragrance thing, lol 🤣😳😳😬

I LOVE THESE VIDEOS SO MUCH!

By the way I'm PREGNANT! "Soon to be a mother of 4" Nice way to slip that in there. Congratulations!

Dude didn’t exactly ask MIL to leave and stay gone. He just asked her to go change into anything else and come back. If they could go bring cake to MIL they have to live close enough or have a cousin go get an outfit. Something could have been done but the wife and MIL didn’t seem to want to compromise.

Dang, I can see that girls family lettung her put on her own show if they go to the theater 😂

Jamie, MIL and wife are the AHs!!!! 100%. You kidding?

Seriously… if I’m causing someone to have an allergic reaction then I would definitely feel embarrassed but I would also do everything I could to fix the problem… also I know damn well I wouldn’t even have to ask my parent to leave if they where the cause… they would have already left to fix the perfume issue… Very poorly handled by the bride and the mother

First one: it’s just a terrible situation and entirely the brothers and “Grace”s fault in my opinion. Imagine you started dating a guy and his family is just viewing you as a replacement or a space holder and waiting for you to be tossed away so you can be replaced by the clearly favoured ex again. If I was the girlfriend I wouldn’t take this out on the sister and her wedding but instead have a deep talk with my boyfriend and break up if need be

Love these videos ❤❤❤

Story 1 Sara the plus one should have been UNinvited the minute she swore at OP & called her the C word. End of discussion. Problem solved. Story 2 As sucky as it was, MIL should have left to get a change of clothes after the ceremony & quick photos. It sucked, but you can't have a wedding without a groom & I am a mother of 2 girls & grandmother of 7 girls. SHE was not 'necessary' & should have figured it out & come back. I wouldn't let my presence jeopardize my daughter's wedding for any reason. Story 3 The bride should make the wedding child free & that would eliminate the problem with Shirley Temple. No need to turn down her performance if she isn't invited in the first place.

Story 2: the bride was the A-hole. She can't be without her mother for ONE single hour on her wedding day??? Is this a child bride? That's the most selfish thing I've heard of. That woman could have gotten clothes (any kind of clothes) somewhere, anywhere, so the groom could participate in his own wedding. Leave her!

Love this

Why is the audio quality so low?

Bride chose her mother on her wedding night over her husband? That's a very bad sign. Are they still married? I don't care if the ten year old niece sang like Celine Dion, not at my wedding!

For story 2, what I don't understand is who in the wedding party arrives in their outfit? You get ready wherever the wedding is unless you all got ready really close by. In which case she either had an outfit on premises or close enough to drive and be back in under an hour.

1. She not an a hole. She had the right to tell her off. If she didnt curse her out or call her names, what she said was TRUE and acceptable. It's her choice to respond or not to respond. I wouldnt allow her crazy self at my wedding either. 2. It's happened 2 times already, and y'all couldn't warn anybody NOT to wear perfume ahead of time?... I don't understand why someone else who is less important to the event couldn't go get her another outfit.What about the cousins, aunts, sisters, anybody with a bath robe... this mother and daughter just didnt try and completely disregarded this man's health!! it's not a good way to start off a marriage especially being that she didnt spend the night with her husband. looks like she wanted to stay married to her family! 3. Absolutely not! Children are not wedding entertainment. give a strong NO and DO NOT FEEL BAD.

For story 2 I feel so bad for the groom. I used to think that people with perfume allergies were just being dramatic....and I definitely think so are, but when essential oils/all things lavender became popular I discovered that I am very, very allergic to lavender (and cedar and eucalyptus) and if I am around them I am miserable. If I smell them in the air I immediately go the other direction and I avoid people and situations where I am likely to be around those scents because it's just that awful, not to mention that allergic reactions can be very serious, not just annoying. So I have a lot of sympathy. I do think that Jamie has some really good points about how we don't know the surrounding circumstances (like maybe the wedding was late and in a woodland far from a town so getting clothes would have been really difficult). We also don't know if OP was a jerk in how he spoke. But I have to say I really, really don't like that the wife spent the night with her parents.

1. NTA I'd do the same!!! Id take away my brother plus one and explain why to him. 2. I get you, you can't do anything about the perfume making you sick. But I also feel bad for MIL because she probably didn't know.I do think MIL is TA because she could have easily went and changed but refused.Also wife should understand how bad it is and should have told her mom to go change and come back. 3. NTA, it's your wedding not a show expecally because its 15-45 minutes. If it was like 3 then id be like okay whatever

For the second one, I do think the groom should have told people in the bridal party ahead of time that he has occasionally had reactions to perfumes and if people could abstain that would be appreciated. I sometimes get terrible migraines from perfumes and when it comes to important events, I tell people ahead of time that though their perfumes smell nice I just can't take the risk of getting a terrible migraine and ask them to hold off on it. Is it possible that if they wore it that I would be fine? Sure I suppose. But it's not worth the risk on important milestone days.

Wow...broke those vows at the wedding reception...lol "sickness and in health" and instead your new huaband is on a couch and you're crying at your mothers house...😮ummmmmm

For, the MIL perfume story. I think the wife and the MIL were both being selfish. It's the grooms day too, not just the brides. I don't think it was a unreasonable request for the MIL to get a change of clothes. She could have went to a Wal-Mart or somewhere to get a change of clothes real quick and then came back. Instead, the bride pushed the groom to the side and made him miss some of his own wedding day.

❤🧡💛💚💙💜

I'm kind of surprised that a kid, especially a relative, performing something at a wedding is seen as odd, but maybe that's just a cultural difference. Expecting a 15 - 40 minute time slot is a lot though and ultimately it is up to the bride and groom anyways. If they don't want something for their wedding then it generally should be respected without complaints.

Story 2: uhhhhh... if it is a severe reaction actually, this is rough. I have a weird feeling this guy might be a whiny Beta~male, and I would've had someone from the wedding party to grab some Sudafed, what ever it's called and sucked it up. I get WICKED hay fever, and chlor tripolon always does the trick for this. As stated earlier, if this was and actual SEVERE allergic reaction, I apologize. The MIL isn't the A. This requires a little more context.

😂😅🤦🏼‍♀️ I'd rather listen to 40mins total of toasts, than that long of a kid dancing weird/singing. I'm a Nanny, and as cute as it is here and there, yeah heck nope.

For the perfume:who the heck spritzes it all over a dress?? She should have volunteered to go home and change or go find a shop. Maybe the mother in law should offer to go with her. But parents should do what’s best for the couple!