Also adding on to your point about ‘Asian sizing’, I notice among (mostly white) lolitas infantilising comments are very normalised and joked about. I too wish more brands would make a variety of sizes and i understand the frustration of clothes not fitting you, but that is not an excuse for the often mean spirited and racist remarks about ‘tiny asian girls’ ‘asian women who fit x are all short and have no boobs’ ‘asian women aren’t real women’, ‘all these asian clothes are made for children’ etc. Infantilisation of asian women is one of the most common micro aggressions against us, stereotypes about asian women being tiny, weak, childlike, submissive etc. contribute to fetishisation, discrimination and violence towards us. Yet in lolita it is considered normal to laugh and mock at our expense because we are privileged to be able to fit certain things. In a broader context however it’s extremely hurtful and harmful.

I liked your inclusion of "Taobao quality", some of my favourite and high quality pieces are from Taobao which I adore!

I appreciate your comments on both wa/qi and taobao vs a Japanese brand which had their piece manufactured, in China. The first piece I bought since having gothic lolita items for years was a wa JSK from meta, the spirited away at twilight series. To me it was an excellent marriage of a western style silhouette of the JSK with the kimono elements of artwork and details on the cut. It really is an example of a multicultural element of our global times and if you are wearing any sort of clothing with confidence, that is all that matters. Furthermore, if someone did take the line that only Asian people should wear this style, it would make pieces that are say Slavic inspired to only be worn by Slavs even though it was designed by a Japanese person. I have to admit, I'm always a little surprised at how many lolita pieces use Slavic motifs and patterns.

This is definitely a topic that should be discussed more in the lolita community. We all have biases that can be unlearned and yet some in the community feel the need to perpetrate them.

Hello, western Wa lolita here. I wanted to say I appreciate you're take on wa/qi, I started out as a wa lolita! Despite all the blog posts and advice of others I saw warning me against wearing wa (especially at the beginning), it was the style that spoke out to me the most. I was anxious about posting my pics on Instagram because I was still new to the fashion and I feared the lolita community's gate keeping reputation but honestly, after a year and a half all I've gotten was love and support from everyone enjoying my wa coords. I'd say the biggest thing that keeps non asians from trying wa/qi is their own personal mindset that they might offend someone by simply wearing it. I've had a handful of people tell me that they love wa but because they're white they don't feel like they have the right to wear it which is really saddening to me. You said it best in the video; If brands didn't want foreigners to wear it then they wouldn't market it to us! I can't see how anyone would be offended by a foreigner trying to understand and enjoy their culture via clothes, if anything Japanese people love it when we wear wa!! Misako herself stated that she wanted to share wa with the world, so hopefully with takes like yours people will start to feel more empowered to wear this beautiful sub-style. Great video :D

I'm going to be honest, i feel this needs to be talked about more. Especially in North America. Like, as a kind reminder. I think that with the influx in Japanese and other Asian pop culture rising in the US, it's caused some people to forget how to navigate respectfully. I see it online sometimes.

I'm so glad you brought up Qi and Wa, as well as Taobao Quality. I LOVE Qi! It's pretty much the majority of my current wardrobe. I only have one Wa dress at the moment, but I love both styles so much. It personally saddens me seeing so many guides for beginner Lolitas saying to stay away from Qi and Wa until you're more experienced (especially if you're not Asian), and then still not giving any guidance for those who are "more experienced". I'm black myself and have never had any rude words thrown my way about wearing either Qi or Wa. When I was in college, I had so many friends from Mainland China and they really were happy when I wore Qi or Lolita in general~ I find that it's mostly westerners that don't want to see other westerners wearing Qi/Wa for some reason. I wore two of my Qi dresses out this past weekend for my birthday and got nothing but compliments, so I really hope people don't shy away from it, even if they're from the West! Additionally, my current wardrobe is nothing but Taobao. I have nothing against Brands, but my wallet does. XD I am perfectly fine purchasing from Taobao. Never had a problem with the quality of their dresses and it's another thing that saddens me that people pass up some STUNNING dresses just because they're Taobao. I just started posting videos on this channel just so people can see how gorgeous some of these dresses are. It's not much, but I hope it can maybe show a couple people that Brand isn't your only option for getting a gorgeous dress.

Thank you so much for this. I think these comments are very common and I wish people would stop saying these things. I'm not Asian, black actually, and it's unfair to make these generalizing statements.

i found this video by chance and i'm really glad i did! thank you for speaking up on this, it's much appreciated.

As a South East Asian plus size lolita, thank you for this.

This vid is a year old, but unfortunately still holds true. I really hate how the community treats us especially as someone who’s not a pale East Asian, but rather a very Tan East Asian and wears lolita

I wear Wa and qi and appreciate how the culture is. Japan is the home place for lolita fashion of it existens.

This is such a great informative video that I think is really needed in our community! It's great to be educated on these topics and I know for me personally I have overlooked the Taobao statements and I am extremely grateful to be educated about how harmful that is! It's also completely disregarding the many indie brands that reside on Taobao as they're individual and grouping them all together as if they're just one big thing instead of their own is just misrepresenting. I will for sure be more mindful in how I hear, see, and speak on that topic and all the others and become more mindful. Thank you for spreading your perspective and informing our community to keep it a safe and welcoming space for everyone!

Very thought provoking video, well done. We absolutely should drop the talk about asian women being tiny as a complaint about the fashion. It's not about that, it's all about fast fashion operating systems, "one size fits all"-fallacy and basic patterns. I originally went way deeper into all this, but it's a KZfaq comment... no point in writing a paragraph after a paragraph about the efficient tragedy that is our fashion industry.

wonderful video! I learned a lot just from this 5 min video and i appreciate you speaking up on this :))

This was such a great and informative video to watch. I really liked the structure of the video and how you broke down what could seem like a huge topic into key, clear points :) I have always felt confused when I have heard fellow western lolitas say they 'love Wa lolita but would never wear it' because they aren't asian/don't want to be disrespectful. Thankyou for talking about this in your video! Also, I absolutely love your coord! Meta makes such beautiful dresses 😍

i was around 13 when i got into lolita in florida. i am filipino and at the time, didn’t have the independence with my money to afford clothes or even the freedom of mobility to attend events, plus most folks were older than me. but i ended up getting banned simply because my mom couldn’t drive me to a tea party that i rsvp’d to. it was unfortunately a very toxic, unpleasant experience, given that the majority of folks in the community at the time were well-off white women who often bad-mouthed one another on behind the bows, etc. there was only one lolita who was truly kind, and she happened to be south asian. we still talk to this day! but yeah, i came into the community and left quickly after. although i didn’t experience micro-aggressions towards my asian identity, it was definitely towards my age and class background at the time (i am 25 now! whoa haha); it is only now that i am actually seeing people of color being represented in this fashion, and i wish that existed back then, because then there would be better accountability towards the people who perpetrated awful racial stereotypes and prejudice against low-income folks. glad that the number of people of color of this community is growing in representation and that people are finally coming out about these issues that have persisted for years. i am only looking into getting back into the fashion after a really disappointing experience in my youth, and it’s really thanks to people like yourself. thank you for this 🙏🏽

Thanks for bringing this up!

I'm sorry that people are still saying these kinds of things. Thank you for making this video!

I love your take on this. Your coord and hairstyle are awesome♡

Thank you for this vid! I have to check myself, as well.

Great video! But please remember BIPOC and POC are not adjectives they're acronyms for nouns and grammatically doesn't make sense/ sounds silly when talking about us.

So important and thank you for this video

The "only Asian people can wear walolita/ kimono" always annoyed me. If they knew anything about Kimono as a whole they would know how silly they sound. Not to mention, that if they truly believed that then that is also saying the same for Japanese people as well. Because a lolita , their modern clothes, and even stuff like the randoseru originated from European countries. So wouldn't that mean they couldn't wear those things too because it's cultural appropriation? In the end the people making this claim just sound like uneducated hypocrites who want to segregate people and be racist.

👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 SOMEONE FINALLY SAID IT!!!!