“We’re the type of people that won’t know we’re struggling until we’re fainting.” LMAOO FELT. Just a reminder that moving is one of the most stressful life events! Sending you much love-you’re clearly trying your hardest, so I hope you’re being gentle with yourself 🖤

This came at the perfect time for me. I’m very attached to my childhood home and I it’s killing me that I might have to leave it soon.

Oh, that’s what it is! Always wondered why no-one else seemed to experience the same thing like me whenever I was moving. Moving for me was always moving from a nice place to an even nicer place that we had chosen for ourselves, but still it took me many months to emotionally get through it after we had been to the new place. No matter how much I loved the new place, I had to go through some serious grief of "losing" the old one. It still gets me into a weird mood whenever I actively think about the fact that those spaces don’t exist (in the form that we inhabited them) anymore or that I can’t just walk into them again like I did for years.

OMG! That's what it is?!This makes SOOO much sense! I'm AuDHD and not only is the process of moving ALL executive functioning but now that sense of utter dread and untethered discomfort I felt leaving a place that was objectively terrible makes complete sense. Oh my gosh!

as a late-diagnosed autistic woman who just moved to a new apartment last week - omg all of this resonates SO MUCH. Also I don't know if you've publicly shared your chronic pain stuff online but I also JUST got diagnosed with EDS on monday and there is a correlation between autism, EDS, POTS and MCAS. If you aren't sure why you have chronic pain I'd urge you to research EDS - its a genetic connective tissue disorder and chronic joint pain is definitely on that list.

Moving out of my childhood home was so devastating to me, I felt like that house and the woods around it raised me. Thinking about it now is making me more emotional than I anticipated. I'm moving into a place with my boyfriend in the fall and I'm excited but I'm so worried about being in a new place and not having my surroundings consist solely of my things and the way I like having them.

I moved recently and it sent me into a depression for a few months, with an intensity I had never experienced before and it was super scary. Thankfully back to normal now with the help of a friend that lives nearby who made me food from time to time and took care of chores I wasn't able to do. Watching your video is making me emotional because I'm remembering the ANXIETY of it all. Scary times. I'm wishing you all the best to get back into the flow of things! That view you have looks so peaceful and soothing :)

I know myself so well and sometimes I don’t have the language to describe what I’m experiencing or how to express the severity of my decision making, as a result I tend to start making decisions that I have an explanation for even if it’s a choice that’s not suitable for me. You put the language to my experience which affirms and validates those things that I knew but didn’t know how to explain, and that reminds my brain of how to make choices suitable for me.

Don't forget we leave our energy in places...and have to withdraw it. its one of the things that ties us to a place.

About 7 years ago now, I was my moms caregiver as much as she was mine. She passed away and pretty soon after that, I lost the home we had shared. All these years later I'm still struggling with letting go of that space being my home and my mother no longer being there. Currently my husband and I are about a week away from actual homelessness this time as we have no where else to go. Autism is incredibly debilitating and makes you feel so completely helpless a lot of the time, at least for me. Sending all the love and good energy your way, things will get easier in your new space! ❤

This video is exactly what I needed to see right now. I’m moving in a month or so, not only out of my house of the past three years, but to an entirely different state to live with my partner. I’m excited but currently just feeling very nervous - I know how hard big environmental changes can be on me. Even just thinking about the move recently has me more deregulated than usual. I find myself mourning not only my friends here but also random things like the tree outside my window, my familiar walking routes, my bedroom walls; I feel deeply saddened that I will one day soon walk out my front door for the last time. It’s comforting to know that other people struggle with change as much as I do, and also have a difficulty letting go of spaces, routines, and little familiarities. I’m going to try to stay in tune with myself during the move, and am prepared this time for the depression to follow. It’s nice to hear from someone who shares that experience as well.

Beyond relatable. 6:25 I’ve done this more times than I can count- and I’ve moved A Lot

I found this video relatable, and comforting. I’m currently experiencing a prolonged and very uncertain period of change and it’s hard. Thank you for sharing your experience and how you’re making it through.

I just had a move and this video came out and it's really validating. I have trauma around moving and my move was really really rough. It's really nice to see that I'm not...bad for struggling, I guess. Thanks for reminding me of that. Great video!

I didn’t realize how much I would need this video but my mom told me we were moving back in with my dad after there rocky relationship and all I could think about is how I miss my room 😅 I’m glad I’m not the only one getting really attached to places cause I felt so awkward crying over leaving my bedroom

I 100% feel this way! I am also autistic and the way I cope with these feelings are doing similar things to you, like planning layouts of apartments / houses when moving, or taking lots of pictures of my space and things. I literally look back on these pictures and get sad that I don't have the same space / things laid out.

This felt better than I thought it would be. Everything is relatable (I'm autistic myself), but the stimming in the chair caught me off guard. I've never seen anyone do this "chest pounding" idk what to call it, and watching it felt really validating because I do exactly that when I need it, so thank you. I hope you can settle and feel at home soon ❤

Perfect timing. Due to family illness and the desire to help out, we are moving. Thank you for helping me understand my husband. He not only diagnosed with Asperger but also mild Bipolar in 2021. I will be so much more patient this time around.

It would be cool if you later did a video on what is helpful when going through these transitions, whether anecdotal experience or things you have heard from a psych etc. As a fellow autistic that has just finished a big move as well, it is such a big difficult experience

I relate so hard. I used to cry as a child when my mom would rearrange my bedroom. Now as an adult, I have INTENSE anxiety when my space is altered severely, and traveling is like a nightmare for me because I don't have my safe space.

I actually think the apartment drawing is a genius tip. I get so anxious moving and I think I’ll try this next time ❤

I'm facing struggles at work and am considering changing job, but I have a highly specialized profile, and I know I won't find another job near my place, so changing job would mean moving out to a new town. It scares the life out of me, for I only moved in my current place about a year ago, and I vividly remember the few month before moving out as some of the worst of my life, despite moving to a larger, more comfy place, way more appealing to my needs, and being the owner of my home instead of renting. I can't even imagine leaving that place now that I've grown used to it. It fills my mind blank until I stop considering it altogether. Considering how much of a failure my moving out has been, I have no advise for you, but don't worry, your new place will feel just as good if not better as the old, given some time

As another autistic with chronic pain, I'm so glad I found your channel!! It is so affirming to hear you talking about things that I've felt (the attachment to space/objects, the wanting to prepare as far in advance as possible etc)!

I'm still watching, but I had to pause at the part talking about re-drawing over and over while in that limbo space before the move. I have never related so hard. I used to draw blueprints of my "dream house" in high school, I think to try to help me prepare and get excited for adulthood while in a very uncomfortable home environment. Now, I've moved eight times (EIGHT!!! TIMES!!!) in the past three and a half years, and over half of those were me helping a whole other person (my partner) with all of our shared belongings as well. Not only have I not had the time to process and recover between moves, but I haven't had access to most of my belongings in months. My whole world, everything, feels like chaos right now. And I still have to prepare for yet another move that will inevitably come within the next year. Before my second to last move, I went so far as to recreate the house I'd be sharing with my best friend in The Sims. I recreated it from memory, and if I remember correctly, I spent *days* creating our characters and the house, even going so far as to build the greenhouse out back. Somehow it is comforting. It's true that it makes it feel like it's more real, and like you're actually doing something about the situation. My move wasn't even confirmed when I started that build, but doing it did make me feel better about it when I ultimately made that decision. Editing to add: I'm also dealing with chronic pain and am still navigating how to get treatment in my circumstances. This video was absolutely entertaining, along with being incredibly relatable. I relate so much with constantly moving and adjusting to combat the pain and, honestly, seeing and hearing about your experience with it makes me feel less alone and less weird for constantly adjusting in similar ways in the company of people who seem to have no issue sitting still.

I haven’t watched all the way through this yet, but I just spent a week in the hospital because of a depressive episode that was partially triggered by moving. The change, even though it’s positive is so overwhelming.

The house seems real nice! It's lovely to be so close to the trees. Take your time adjusting to your new living space and don't beat yourself up over it

This gives me flashbacks to when I last moved too it's so overwhelming but everybody expects you to be happy all the time

Thank you for this video. For mental health issues, moving could cause overload. This is very informative and can help others to be self aware when the brain gets foggy.

Yes i feel very sentimental about places and certain things about them, like the nice dim lighting, the way the sunlight travels across the floor, the outside spaces, so much PS also im sentimental about my things, i have a nickel with a bunny on it, but dishes also pillows, could b anything

I'm going to watch this after my therapy session. I've spent one whole year getting used to my new place, even though I am glad in my new flat. I am very attached to places I build some history (almost like a human bond) with. Not having enough money to buy the whole furniture at the same time didn't help feeling home right after the transition. Packing and unpacking was very easy, not being able to settle the items in the right place because the places were to create, THAT was my difficulty.

I relate to you so much it makes me cry with joy. I've never heard anyone describe the "limbo space" before and I struggle with that feeling all the time. Watching your videos really helps me validate my feelings thank you for making these videos :)

Thank you so much for sharing this. My daughter is like this. I use to be when I was little. Not as much anymore (I am 41). But she’s 8 and has a really really hard time with changing anything, moving, getting rid of our old car etc.

Thank you soo much for this video… I’ve recently only found out I was neuro divergent, and I look back and see how scenarios like this was soo relatable. I moved to a new job not long ago, and though I didn’t like the job itself, a lot of the things like the surroundings, co workers, and even inanimate objects, I had an attachment to. Everything you said here, resonated with me, which makes me not feel so alone 🙏🏽😌 you got yourself a new subscriber!

My wife and I are likely relocating in two years or so. We have already starting planning how we're going to do things because I'm nervous about transitioning to a new home. I'm also excited because there are so many accommodation-based changes I would make to this place if we were staying here forever. Not looking forward to the grief that will come with leaving this home

I understand you. I'm in the procress of moving too and I'm feeling worse than usual, having more nightmares, my heart is racing like crazy... not only that but I'm also on my period which is extremely painful and disabling for me. Worst part is that I'm not even moving to a better house, but to my mother's house. I can't pay rent here anymore because my landlord wants to sell the house.

Also it sounds like you have a very intuitive partner. I’m happy for you ❤

When I was in college, I moved spaces multiple times a year and it got to the point I never felt settled until I bought my house and stayed in it for multiple months. Transitions are REALLY hard

I'm going to have to move to another city soon so this came out the right time❤ I am so overwhelmed and stressed even though I still have almost a month left here. I get physical stress symptoms so I'm just barely sleeping and eating and just failing to cope.

this is pretty much perfect timing for me, we've started the process of selling the house I was literally BORN in and as much as I'm sooo excited and it's necessary I'm also terrified ❤

I'm also moving next week! I keep waking up to thoughts of doubt, if I shouldn't have chosen the other room (I am going to be living in a room as a student). I keep having to repeatedly explain to myself why I made the choice I made (a room closer to the school and therapie, because I know I will possibly be too drained after school to cycle for 10 km aaaand having to think through the logistics of also going to therapie and groceries). This week I had a flu, whilst I had to go through packing and ordening and arranging my paperwork etc. I am so drained, also because I lost my routines of exercise and walking because of the flu. I feel you, it is hard, I like that you said "It's okay to feel dread", I can get so scared to feel the dread of all the hassle that I just avoid thinking of the move (and thus not plan it as I should).

1000000%. all the way back to early childhood, like when my family got a new car & traded in the old one, it was HORRIBLE on me.

I can relate like i love learning a floorplan and being SURE about how I'm gonna inhabit a place

This video was extremely helpful for me. I recently finished moving all my things into my partner's apartment. I really struggled with this move even though I'm really happy about the choice to live with my partner. Moves have always been hard for me. I moved out of my childhood home over 10 years ago, but I still grieve the loss. I'm embarrassed to talk about it with other people because I get so sad. I always wondered why I was like that, and couldn't find anyone else with similar experiences. Starting around 4:00 what you were describing was very similar to me. Especially how I get emotionally attached to inanimate objects. I have many times throughout my life been criticized for keeping too many "things", but a lot of those things feel like part of me. How could I throw out parts of myself? I'm just realizing as I type this comment, that a lot of my things that I can't part with relate to one of my special interests. This requires more thought... Thank you so much for making this video!

Adhd here and I feel everything you say. Struggle with all of these things and coping with long covid and other health issues honestly if I do anything out of my normal routine I'm whacked at the moment xx well done for getting though and thanks for sharing hope you're settled now

Im about to move and Im downsizing and Im going to have to get rid of some stuff, one thing in particular im going to have to get rid of is my favorite lounge chair...its a little broken and I wont have the space and I literally cried cause I didnt want to throw away my chair and the thought of it being in the dumpster all sad and alone after being such a good chair made me so deeply sad. Im sad thinking about it now. I remember moving out of my childhood home and I had to seriously mourn the loss of that home. I remember taking videos and pictures and taking a walk through the house to say goodbye to everything...I remember actively trying to remember every detail of the home so that id always have it with me in my memory. Getting rid of clothes has always been very hard for me, same with inanimate objects- I have a lot of trinkets lol

Girl, I TOTALLY resonate with you on everything you talked about! Moving has always been extremely difficult for me, and unfortunately I have had to move many, many times in my life. If I had a choice, I would stay in one home forever, but life circumstances haven't given me that opportunity! 😃 Now that I know I'm autistic, it makes so much sense why moving throws me totally out of whack. When you were talking about getting attached to living spaces, and the routines within those spaces, I totally felt that. When I think back to different places I have lived, I remember how I felt in certain rooms, like the kitchen, bedroom, bathroom, and even the views from certain windows. I can remember in detail how I felt moving about in those different living spaces, and the routines I had. The most important rooms to get situated first for me are the kitchen and the bathroom. Before that happens, I'm a completely dysregulated mess! Once those 2 spaces are somewhat organized, then I can start building a new routine, and I feel much more comfortable. Having a routine is everything for me, and without it I'm completely lost! Thank you for sharing your experience, it really helped me to understand myself more.

Thanks for daring. I realized that I had experience a certain level of shutdown while going through a move.

I moved into a (literally) new home about 9 months ago. I started planning it more than half a year before that. So, I knew the exact lay out of all the furniture for every room, decided on the color of the paint and wallpaper way before, etc. You could say that I familiarized myself with the change that was coming, making it less of a change (if that makes any sense?). My main focus on moving day was to make sure that the bedroom was completely, and I really mean completely, finished, as this is my "safe room". That way I could reduce anxiety to a minimum, although moving day was still a struggle.

As someone who plans on moving out with my partner (we're both autistic) this was very helpful, thank you

I feel so heard by your videos😭😭😭gosh i love that i found your channel🫶🏽

O Irene, we're rooting for u. My move was at the beginning of July but into a camper for the summer so it was kinda crazy. I wondered if i would feel too cramped in such a tiny space, where would i meditate, I'd have to do yoga outside, we have to use the bathroom in the house close by. There were a lot of swirling thoughts about that move but i did make it. I put our stuff all wherever it needed to go and it turned out the space us ok, we do spend a lot of time outside. We got out of a bad situation where we were living under the rule of my mother-in-law and husbands stepdad. I was so glad to b free of the stress of it

When I break up with someone I grieve also not to be in his flat anymore and the routines I got used to we had together. Like riding in his car. All those things that are more than just about the person

I also get attached to physical objects and spaces. I might have to move soon and just the idea of it has me in a mental breakdown all week

this might not be the right place to say something like this but: i've recently gone to a private doctor (i live in a country with free healthcare) after my partner told me that he suspected i might have autism and/or adhd. my partner and i have been talking about this for a long time especially since i wasn't willing to see a doctor at first, but he has helped me with making a list of stuff to say during the visits. after the first visit the doctor told me she wanted me to take an autism test, and after we were done she told me that the test results showed that i had autism. however she also said that to receive a diagnosis i must have exhibited some specific behaviors during very early childhood, and to know about that she needed to talk with my parents (even though i am now 18) this has given me so much stress, because even tho the test i took gave a positive result and every online test i took (i know online tests aren't too reliable, but i took one that was sent to me by an autistic person who thought it was pretty valid and i got a score of 215 out of 240) gave very high scores, with the childhood thing i'm pretty sure that i wouldn't be autistic. which kind of confuses me because of what i already said and because honestly i do heavily relate to many symptoms of autism and that would explain things that have bothered me for all my life. same with adhd, my partner is diagnosed with it and he's told me that he very highly suspects i have it since we have incredibly similar symptoms (with the exception that he's more on the hyperactive side). obviously i'm not gonna go against what a doctor who specializes in this says, however it's incredibly frustrating because i've always been told that i was "just a bit stressed" from the doctors that visited me and while i know that's not something i should want, i really wish i had something so that i could have an answer to why i feel and act the way i do

After I moved out of my parents house and went to college, I actually developed the routine of moving pretty frequently. I got attached to the idea of minimalism, and it has made moving really easy. At this point, I have a hard time actually staying in one place and feel very uncomfortable owning things that cannot be easily moved.

I relate so much with everything you said! My bf recently moved in with me and it was really hard for a few weeks when everything was all over the place and my routines were out of wack. I basically couldn’t function, work or relax until everything was put away

I definitely am the same with attachment to objects and my space 🤍 I’ve kept this stuffed elephant Ellie with me since i was born and I’m almost thirty now 😂 And the layout thing omg i have feng shui as a special interest 😂 if i can place things well i do great but if not i can get super disregulated haha 😅 Add maximalism rock an toy collections and you get a big ol neurocolorful mess 😂 My keyboard isz broken lol so sorry if there’s typos I have chronic knee pain and recently discovered that cannabis helps get to the cause of my pain 😅 which i have mixed feelings about but at least it’s legal for medicinal purposes here just putting it out there if your pain is caused by inflammation ❤

Oh wow moving is such an ordeal. Emotionally, logistically, all sorts of changes. You got this! Thanks for sharing!! ❤ The trees are worth it, so happy for you!

The pain that you have mentioned and mentioned in the past might be EDS (Ehler's Danlos Syndrome) / HSD (Hypermobile Spectrum Disorder). As well as some of the other things you've mentioned in vids. There's a correlation between autism and it.

I've always made phones and computers last until they literally just don't work at all anymore because I hate moving over to new ones that much, it never even crossed my mind that it might be my autism so it makes a lot more sense now

I was on the verge my first panic attack when we thought we were moving. Everything fell apart for me but now I understand why.

I'm moving for the first time rn. I'm so happy to get my own place but it's been kinda difficult. It's really hard for me to change my routine and how I set all my stuff up. I've been moving little by little and I'm grateful I can do so because it's already overwhelming.

Immaculate timing! I moved home yesterday 😅

In 2 weeks, I'm gonna stop working as a physiotherapist for good because of my EDS and AuDHD that made it no more sustainable for me. I've been working at the same place for 5 years, and I've grown attached to it and to my routines, so I'm terrified about the change of leaving it all behind even though it is a good thing because that job was to exhausting and painful for me.

I started watching the video as I was packing boxes to move... I'm moving in 3 weeks. I'm sitting here now thinking that this is a very neuro spicy thing to do. This whole process has thrown me off my access and it seems to be taking from what little energy i have to put towards social activities and making my sensory issue go a little crazy right now. but your video made me feel not alone ❤ thank you for sharing your world

super relateble as i just had to move into a new place recently and am struggling adjusting to new habits. I was diagnosed Audhd officially at 25 years old a few months ago.

Last time i moved i build my new home in 3D and put all my furnitures into it so i knew how it would be when i would move in. Did it 3 months in advance so i could mentally settle in.

I no longer have nightmares. I have now what I call 'stress dreams'. 99% of them are dreams of moving.

I'm moving countries for University in a month and I just found out which dorm I was placed in today, I totally relate to this! I can't do anything yet but my suitcases are out, I have pinterest up for decorating ideas, looking at walking tours of the area etc. I'm super excited but I'm also scared, and want to be able to prepare like NOW hahha

Ugh that limbo space is the worst. Wishing you the best on your transition. ✨

Hi hi! I was wondering- can you possibly make a video that explains how neurotypical people see the world to an autistic person like myself? I feel like there's a lot of resources out there to help neurotypical people understand those with ASD, but I really don't even know how to start researching the opposite

I just moved too and my hunger and thirst aren't doing their proper job... This might be an explanation! Also, I felt so seen when you mentioned the "preparing wayy earlier than others" thing, I did the exact same.

Sweetheart irene you are such an incredibly strong woman love you're videos you are a very wise intelligent woman you are such a loving and lovable person awesome and intelligent video

Just one more person needing to express an insane amount of resonance….just trying to get started to pack today, leaving a painful chaotic place to move into an empty large pretty house where I can line up things geometrical and no one else making weird comments, 🎉. Still occasionally anxious when trying to find the right place for one thing, but often the right idea comes when I have the thing in my hand and turn in a circle around my space. There it goes, in a basket. 😂 I want to dance and at the same time grief. ADHD and Autism dance…

I am a disabled person and I am on the Autism spectrum i have PDD-NOS. And i am 38 years old and i am a male.

I am just curious. When you say pre doing something, do you mean like doing something before it happens like preparing for or preventing something before they happen? I struggle without context. You are so right! I have been focusing on showing how all people have the same emotions, I have overlooked and not recognized how depression can be processed differently for everyone. As someone with both Autism and A.D.H.D., thank you for helping me see that. I am sorry your move was a hard transition. I know it isn't easy or as celebrational as you might think during the process. Home should be important to everyone.

Hello! Long time watcher, first time comment-er, I think. I was wondering if there was a resource where people can find reviews of reliable and helpful autism screening people (like ratemyprofessor but for autistic help, screening, and diagnosis)? I find that a lot of time it’s really hard to find what autism screeners are reliable and up to date on the times for screening, especially as a woman. I’d also be interested in where to look for communities of autistic adult women that I can join, like a discord :)

Merci ! Grâce à vos mots je comprends enfin cet état de déprime lancinante que je peux ressentir lorsque quelque chose change dans ma vie. D'où le fait que je n'ai toujours pas réussi à changer de travail après toutes ces années malgré le fait que je suis à bout. Je me dissocie.

Yo

question, is it appropriate to say you’re nonverbal if it’s temporary?

I suggest a channel called @Einzelganger Its been really helpfull for me. Im 39yo, autistic, lived in 15houses, 7cities, and 2countries.... and Im kinda happy my life fits in just two suitcases. Wish you the best

I moved back in February, and I am still disregulated from it. My apartment still feels wrong and nothing is in the right place. 🫠 I couldn’t leave my house for weeks initially.