Bertcast # 267 - Kelsey Cook, Taylor Tomlinson, Delanie Fischer, & ME

Рет қаралды 71,415

6 жыл бұрын

I sit down in the mancave with the girls of the "Self-Helpless" Podcast Kelsey Cook, Taylor Tomlinson and Delanie Fischer to talk about the me too movement, writing comedy, and sex stories.
Check out their podcast "Self-Helpless" on iTunes or online at selfhelplesspodcast.com
To get your custom mug google "Dicks by Delanie" and shop on her Etsy
For all TOUR DATE & MERCH click HERE: www.bertbertbert.com
To Follow me on..
Twitter: / bertkreischer
Facebook: / bertkreischer
Instagram: bertkreisch...
KZfaq: / akreischer

Пікірлер: 179

@Trying2Bond 6 жыл бұрын

The only guy that can sit down with 3 women and talk more than all of them combined.

@osagedude 2 жыл бұрын

He doesn't listen to any of them

@laurenclark1304 4 жыл бұрын

I really like Bert because I genuinely think he's a GOOD person. He really seems to have a good heart and that's really cool!

@Samsquanch1993 2 ай бұрын

Lol. Good heart. Yeah metaphorically

@MidwestRdub Жыл бұрын

Thanks again Bert for introducing us to these amazing ladies!!!

@gevee20 3 жыл бұрын

Taylor Tomlinson set on the special was so tight much respect

@PaulMeranda 6 жыл бұрын

im totally the dude in my group that can sit with 3 girls and have a good time talking. half an hour in and thoroughly enjoying this. thanks, as always, for the continued, great content, Bert. i dont usually talk like this, but im surprised at the sexism in the comments. what a bunch of assholes.

@Dud3itsj3ff 6 жыл бұрын

Great episode!!!

@michaelsalazar6337 5 жыл бұрын

One of the best yet!

@rahulahuja30 6 жыл бұрын

Loved this episode!

@FitzieJJ 5 жыл бұрын

Bert was such a trainwreck I could not stop watching.

@DaveSlaz 6 жыл бұрын

Leanne should've been in on this one.

@Gekokujo76 6 жыл бұрын

I have a feeling that she'll be reviewing the footage at least. There is such a recognized power dynamic in this room that it is hard for rape NOT to happen. A designated female overseer (preferably a wise Latina) should definitely be involved in future podcasts like this. I just dont like the visual of a privileged white man plying young women with alcohol in the tool shed out back when these women are obviously in awe of his wisdom and position. He is like a father figure to them, but to him they are just young cunny meat. One of them even said "You're about my dad's age" and another referred to him as an old man later on. Im not saying that rape happened....just that it's time to be more woke about these issues in 2018 and not even give off the appearance of "smarmy" or "rapey" or "coercive" activities.

@thinglizzy2311 6 жыл бұрын

Gekokujo76 prefferabbly a wise Latina was my favorite part 😂

@rickmasterflexify 6 жыл бұрын

"at no point in your rambling incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought.. everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it.. I award you no points and may God have mercy on your soul"

@RedSaint83 6 жыл бұрын

Sometimes Bert mind definitely wanders - especially just as he's about to finish a sentence.

@TheRantinghick 6 жыл бұрын

A simple wrong would have done just fine..... bert was no ware near as infuriating as these 3 chicks. im shocked i made it thru the whole thing.

@str8todamoney 6 жыл бұрын

The Ranting Hick How were they infuriating?

@TheRantinghick 6 жыл бұрын

how were they not? The gossip topics the way they speak. It just wasnt a great podcast for bert. bert was different as well for what ever reason. They made a couple good points, but generally it was a boring show and they seemed to be talking in circles. The whole show revolved around rape more or less and industry stuff most people dont care about.

@str8todamoney 6 жыл бұрын

The Ranting Hick To be fair, Bert insisted on staying on metoo topic. He really should've lead it into a different conversation but he kept bringing it back. I was mostly annoyed with him

@LondonWater 2 жыл бұрын

l appreciate Bert and LeeAnn’s perspectives so much. I wish they would adopt me.. even though I’m 42.

@SailorGreenTea 3 жыл бұрын

Oopsie, am I spilling secrets, I am so candid.

@RudyGardea 6 жыл бұрын

Never seen the sound guy stick his head out more.

@yohanvonbach9668 6 жыл бұрын

He’s new

@yohanvonbach9668 6 жыл бұрын

It’s so Bert doesn’t have to do it himself anymore

@PaulMeranda 6 жыл бұрын

hate to be this guy but... statistically speaking, hes already got the best view of the most attractive girl there

@LockSteady 6 жыл бұрын

0:13 Bert's fat belly walks into the room, followed by Bert, ten seconds later

@davidthompson2320 3 жыл бұрын

almost un-listenable to now as youtube has put in ads every 2 mins

@billymac5481 3 жыл бұрын

Look, a poor.

@stephenrosemusic 6 жыл бұрын

never seen bert squirm so much haha but he looks right at home gabbin with the girls

@ericcampbell85 6 жыл бұрын

I want one of them mugs

@erifkradlatnemele9175 3 жыл бұрын

when I was first tested I was allergic to 23 grasses and trees, dogs, cats, horses and house dust like 50yrs ago. now nothing

@alvinthompson6333 6 жыл бұрын

"Sooo, is it hashtag me too? Or is it pound me too?

@hilary1014 4 жыл бұрын

LOL! definitely pound me too

@blakephotographytexas Жыл бұрын

38:15 Funny, I’m actually a 40 y/o guy and I’m here watching this video because I watched Taylor’s special and then this podcast was recommended to me by KZfaq. I’ve never heard of Bert. Will have to check out his stuff.

@makbaba7005 6 жыл бұрын

For real before watching this podcast I thought these three chicks were the same people lmao

@je__. 9 ай бұрын

"just because you're a boy doesnt mean you have to fvck anything that walk" - bart krystal 😂

@StormKidification 6 жыл бұрын

new bertcast

@cyberneticthezero 6 жыл бұрын

The Jabroni on the computer looks like a knock off Mac from it's always sunny..

@percussionjamz6704 6 жыл бұрын

cyberneticthezero before he packed on major mass

@AlexHerlan 6 жыл бұрын

percussion jamz Cultivated* mass

@EDMTMLFilms 5 жыл бұрын

I didn't know Bert knew Jessie Rodgers

@wheresallthezombies 6 жыл бұрын

that adoption joke was hilarious. she should keep doing that joke.

@batterbatterswing 8 ай бұрын

It was okay, I feel like there's gotta be more to it. Like telling the kid when they grow up "yeah I'm just your babysitter, your real mom cared more about pleasure than the suffering required to attain it" So funny, right?

@barrettpickett5603 Жыл бұрын

A lot of young people have no idea at history. Old people can talk about the train track mentality.

@jimromesadouche9018 6 жыл бұрын

Last 45 was actually good

@Osiwan960 2 жыл бұрын

i love the one fixed camera for the whole time. it should be like that on all podcasts. too many of them keep switching between people, one at a time and you can't see the reactions of the listeners....tunnel vision bad.

@SailorGreenTea 3 жыл бұрын

27:26, the professors.

@Zeustraininghall 6 жыл бұрын

Bert sadly im one of those people that only know you from a podcast! I would be stoked to see you do stand up sometime

@TheBigjuicy091288 4 жыл бұрын

If you get the opportunity to definitely do he's amazing on TV and internet but live the man is amazing

@ch3007ip 6 жыл бұрын

amazing open dialog, keep doing what you do!

@victorheinz809 6 жыл бұрын

Hahahaha the school system in the valley is mainly Latino!!!!!! Brother you moved next to the airport and complaining about the noise ( the airport is Mexico btw)

@waynemarshall246 6 ай бұрын

I get it... bert sees his daughters in them and hes protective.

@SailorGreenTea 3 жыл бұрын

12:59, on egg shells.

@michaelsmith1262 4 жыл бұрын

It got really weird around the 11 min mark.

@Roy_Godiksen 6 жыл бұрын

Clearly the sexiest Bertcast in history.

@yohanvonbach9668 6 жыл бұрын

Berts assistant 😂

@SailorGreenTea 3 жыл бұрын

29:11, sick 😆

@je__. 9 ай бұрын

lucky bart 😂

@markm3706 6 жыл бұрын

Who’s the random jabroni at the computer? Does Bart have a producer now?

@robsmalls 6 жыл бұрын

Yep, name of Halston. Been handling the back end of production for the last few episodes now.

@isthatwhatemptymeans8222 6 жыл бұрын

Carlos Mencia ..has to be if he said that would make me happy

@DesignRhythm 4 жыл бұрын

Episode Title: How to keep women extra dry.

@Rogers_Ranger 5 жыл бұрын

very entertaining

@pazzmcwhy9295 6 жыл бұрын

Fuuuuuuuuu!! I missed west palm beach!! 😡

@MrJoshlibby 6 жыл бұрын

Bert, ever think about being the Comic Rep? Your knowledge and experiences could guide the average guy to the best spots in the city for THE laugh to remember the trip? Just sayin..What are we the best clubs in Denver? Trip is planned for memorial day puff puff pa$$ @Grandrapids heard you this morning on the radio GET YOUR SWEET ASS HERE!! lol

@FuckItSnoopy 6 жыл бұрын

I feel like one of them they wrote down was Aziz Ansari. Question is, was that the one who made Bert laugh at the prospect? Does Bert hate Aziz Ansari?

@tvmopf4338 6 жыл бұрын

Kreischer means screamer in German

@spikentheneck629 4 жыл бұрын

Flying dildos?

@urbanmouseification 6 жыл бұрын

I had never heard on any of these women before listening to this. God damn they are funny. Great podcast buckos. Stay awesome

@thinglizzy2311 6 жыл бұрын

Who are these people who " just want to see the machine story " ? I personally would not .

@thinglizzy2311 6 жыл бұрын

1:04:28 Hahaha I fucking knew bert was talking about that shitty joke that tony hinchcliffe , Big Jay and Ari said was bad on a previous episode . Bert just added . I have a friend who married a black girl . ( Bill burr)

@dszgonis 4 жыл бұрын

How much is Bert pretending not to be in heaven? Let’s help him get to 1 mil followers!

@pmac3680 6 жыл бұрын

Hey Bert... I truly believe you are better without the bottle.Keeping it real. By the way... When you're doing a podcast... Nothing is " between me and you". I agree with your therapist.I say this because I believe you're in denial. Most entertainers are narcissistic. Most people are. It's just a heavier form of selfishness.I used to be in that boat. It took constant work to change for the better, but it's possible.Been there and speaking from experience.Peace love and ... Good luck to you!

@jimromesadouche9018 6 жыл бұрын

Bert "I don't mind learning" Chrysler

@AlexHerlan 6 жыл бұрын

JimRomes "over used Rogen comments maymay cliche" aDouche

@jimromesadouche9018 6 жыл бұрын

Alexander Herlan fuck you.

@AlexHerlan 6 жыл бұрын

JimRomes aDouche u fukken mad brah?!?! Stay mad brah!!!! Say it to muh fukken face brah!!! Joo french kiss ya moms w/ dat mouf bruah?!?!?!

@SailorGreenTea 3 жыл бұрын

21:42, closeted is lucrative.

@gideonamare160 6 жыл бұрын

Who dis, the dixie chicks?

@icrawdad572 4 жыл бұрын

Bert might not be racist, I wouldn't to be his lawyer in court.

@thinglizzy2311 6 жыл бұрын

12 mins in . I'm surprised it's gunna last for 2 and half more hours

@avi3020 6 жыл бұрын

Loved these girls.. Awesome podcast Bert

@rootintootin1947 4 жыл бұрын

1:04:00 that joke would work on the east coast. bert wants to be hollywood so bad but hes southeast to the bone.

@TheFunShop 6 жыл бұрын

Us Gingers will take each and everyone of your souls. Please let us make as many babies as we can.

@JohnnySavage 6 жыл бұрын

I loved this so much. But team... Burr and Luis started the 1 hour a year thing... guys... guys... what about Carlin

@brbenedi 6 жыл бұрын

bert sits down with a bunch of chicks and suddenly it's gossip time.

@SailorGreenTea 3 жыл бұрын

11:58, this may be a living saint of comedy.

@NatG84 6 жыл бұрын

The stereotypes in the comments are ironically hilarious. Does anybody know who the comedians they were talking about and wrote down are? Any guesses?

@TheMinneapolisKid 6 жыл бұрын

B*ll C*sby?

@jeffro17801 6 жыл бұрын

Bert' s feet are assaulting me 1:37:00

@Hazelnut22 6 жыл бұрын

Like... eh, like... like, eh, like...

@RedSaint83 6 жыл бұрын

Damn you - I shouldn't have read comments at the very start of the episode..

@williamjosephdunn5879 6 жыл бұрын

the vocal fry episode

@SailorGreenTea 3 жыл бұрын

36:47, Amy Schumer 👍

@comminterntunnels4859 5 жыл бұрын

most of the racist stuff still happens in the south not all of it but if 2 seperate neighborhoods got in a fight black v white this usually how some of the adults would handle especially if its in the evening and all of the adults getting off work drunk

@SailorGreenTea 3 жыл бұрын

22:46, did not know?!😆

@danielseaboldt4153 6 жыл бұрын

Good show.....what’s up with the gay guys at your hotel did you have to beat dudes dude down.

@SailorGreenTea 3 жыл бұрын

24:00, as long as people are not consenting, a brotherhood is into it.

@filibertogarciasi 6 жыл бұрын

Feminist side of Bert gossiping about sex and his Speedo pictures with the girls. This is how it will look 20yrs from now Bert his wife and two daughters.

@osagedude 2 жыл бұрын

Making a point that some women lie about rape is non productive and minimizes violent sexual assault

@owen8350 2 жыл бұрын

What? So many women lie about being sexually assaulted and it fucks up a guys life forever. Yeah, women get SA but so do men, but god forbid a man comes put about it. If a man is SA and comes out about it, it is always negative...

@SailorGreenTea 3 жыл бұрын

10:48, to be this guy, totally a different world of man than I know.

@kylemayer7002 6 жыл бұрын

What the fuck Chuck.

@ericdavis6596 6 жыл бұрын

Tighten up cupcake

@kevinhunter9485 3 жыл бұрын

like like like like like like like...................................

@SailorGreenTea 3 жыл бұрын

17:41, is it so easy?

@SailorGreenTea 3 жыл бұрын

6:22, three years from April.17.2021

@SailorGreenTea 3 жыл бұрын

32:09, nice.

@guillermocortez8050 6 жыл бұрын

Bert is definitely on blow

@jingles.le.fae333 3 жыл бұрын

I think all of them are for sure lol

@SailorGreenTea 3 жыл бұрын

22:43, fraternity, ahh!😷

@richi2240 6 жыл бұрын

Bert!!!! 😀

@knedy 5 жыл бұрын

*The reason why it's "believe all women" is because it's always been the unwritten rule that you automatically believe the guy. If a woman accusses a man of raping her SHE have been interrogated by cops, getting investigated to see if SHE has done anything to see if SHE deserved getting raped. Being alcohol, clothing, being in the "wrong place", and so on.* *Imagine your car being stolen, you go report it to the police but instead of them filing a report they interrogate you for hours. And when it turns out you parked in an area where the street lights where broken they decide not to do anything. Because now that's not your car being stolen, that's you being irresposible and you should have known better in the first place. Case closed. Now the car belongs to the guy who stole it.*

@SailorGreenTea 3 жыл бұрын

23:36, 😆!!!

@sattdaddy2384 5 жыл бұрын

Bert can you put on preacher lawson. I want to see if hes funnier than 7 minutes. Maybe with that noah guy that knows fluffy. Also i would love to eat taylors box.

@SailorGreenTea 3 жыл бұрын

1:08:34, sooner than that.

@SailorGreenTea 3 жыл бұрын

16:45, 😆

@SailorGreenTea 3 жыл бұрын

27:11, no means not any.

@SailorGreenTea 3 жыл бұрын

11:28, 😆

@SailorGreenTea 3 жыл бұрын

14:17, DC you say🤔

@SailorGreenTea 3 жыл бұрын

23:25, 😆

@SkinnyKitchen 3 жыл бұрын

3 hot blondes and Bert? and the show kicks off with chicks bending over to get alcohol? If I wasn't such a fan of Bert's sense of humour, I'd be watching this on mute!

@DaveSlaz 6 жыл бұрын

Bert "don't broadstroke people" then his next sentence broadstrokes people . . . . . .

@Gekokujo76 6 жыл бұрын

Just a gossip sesh with the girls! Bert really has a grasp of the young/female perspective and he definately minded his Ps and Qs around this room full of strong females. I was surprised to hear that they candidly discuss sexual topics....that's just what we need in these troubled times! I like women who buck the system and the trends and just do their own thing. Brave AND Hilarious. Bravo!

@systematik 6 жыл бұрын

"strong females" LoL, have fun being stuck in the friend zone forever beta boy.

@Gekokujo76 6 жыл бұрын

I think Bert would agree that these ladies are strong, hilarious, and brave...and I dont appreciate you assuming my gender. It's 2018....we're here, we're queer....deal with it.

@theyetti8811 6 жыл бұрын

Yes , but they should have been in the pool .

@Rex_Colt 6 жыл бұрын

Geko could be female.. you should investigate more.

@purplepurple8179 6 жыл бұрын

What's a strong women? I've never met one and these women certainly don't have anything strong about them. What about them comes off as strong to you? How low is the bar for what you people consider "strong".

@SailorGreenTea 3 жыл бұрын

21:03, cute.