#BrokenNews

Рет қаралды 12,616

9 ай бұрын

Groundbreaking research has finally explored the link between big cars, and the genital endowment of its owner.
The #BrokenNews team has all the details.
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Пікірлер: 136

@larryandpaul 9 ай бұрын

In a world full of fake news, if you find these updates helpful, you can support impartial #BrokenNews at ko-fi.com/larryandpaul - thanks!

@stanstreatfield3485 8 ай бұрын

Fantastic. Very funny, but dangerous, I almost died laughing.

@kellypaws 9 ай бұрын

103% of F150 owners didn’t realise this was satirical. 427% of Ram owners didn’t know what percentages were.

@Demun1649 9 ай бұрын

Two brilliant One-Liners. And so accurate. Do you have any more? Say, about Nissan drivers, or KIA/Hyundai drivers who think they are in a car?

@kellypaws 9 ай бұрын

@@Demun1649Sadly not. It's fairly easy to poke fun at something that has a strong image. Where do you even start to find a Hyundai's image to poke fun at? It seems like trying to stab a ghost.

@Demun1649 9 ай бұрын

@@kellypaws Yes, I suppose so. KIA/Hyundai used to be separate companies until bought by General Motors, who also bought Daewoo. And most Chevrolet cars on the roads are built by those three companies. South Korea uses tariffs and personal banking laws to restrict the inflow of European cars into Korea. They, along with Japan, operate closed markets, which is against the WTO rules and regulations. Every KIA/Hyundai driver is working to destroy European car companies, while thinking they actually have bought a car, rather than just a very dangerous vehicle. Most police forces were forced, by the Tory government, to replace their Vauxhall cars with Hyundai vehicles, and the number of officers injured in crashes, most caused by asleep civilians, skyrocketed. My friend was in a Hyundai, driven by another sergeant, both Met, in a Hyundai, at night, in the rain, and responding on blues and twos. Another Hyundai didn't stop at a T-junction, and just pulled out in front of them. A high-speed crash, their patrol vehicle on its side, slid across a road, through a brick wall, and ended up hitting the corner of a house. Anne spent 6 weeks in the hospital, and, two years later, is still not fully recovered. The lie about good Japanese and Korean vehicles must be dragged out into the daylight and in the open.

@craigevans6156 8 ай бұрын

😅😅😅

@retrogiftsuk4812 9 ай бұрын

I was a little worried to start with as I don't have a car... But then realised that I mostly travel in a 12 carriage train (240 metres long with 2250 horsepower and 4 flushing toilets)

@brianpark8758 9 ай бұрын

You must have a dinky like a mammoth! A bloke in a suit reading the news said so & that means it must be true.

@tamara3984 8 ай бұрын

3 carrages are for Willy alone.

@ulfosterberg9116 8 ай бұрын

Are you the driver? Or the one the driver drive? That can be painful...

@joudan 9 ай бұрын

As a non-native speaker, I learned a lot of euphemisms with this video. Can I put this knowledge to good use? - No. Is it the most useless thing I've ever learned? - Also, no.

@SuzanneO707 9 ай бұрын

As my dear mother proudly used to say, when us kids weaved lovely stories. "Your a mine of useless information".

@the_grand_tourer 9 ай бұрын

As a native speaker I can confirm we haven't heard of most of these throbbingly impressive euphemisms.

@kanedNunable 9 ай бұрын

@@the_grand_tourer yup, they made a few up then for sure. great wordsmithing by these chaps.

@SuzanneO707 9 ай бұрын

@@the_grand_tourer Ditto. Lol.

@Cancun771 9 ай бұрын

Follow it up with Eric Idle's Penis Song from The Meaning of Life.

@Alopex1 9 ай бұрын

Hulking single-barrelled yoghurt rifle with monumentally capacious bollocks :D You guys are simply brilliant!

@Demun1649 9 ай бұрын

You wouldn't think that if you were the unfortunate woman who met up with one of these pain-inflicting rifles.

@user-kb2oq9zr9m 8 ай бұрын

I'm aaraid they merely use a synonyms dictionary

@Demun1649 8 ай бұрын

@@user-kb2oq9zr9m You are "aaraid"?? Is it a difficult job to become expert in? What do you actually do? Do you know what one they use? By "synonyms dictionary", do you mean a Thesaurus? Is it the Cambridge, I have that on my shelves, or, the Collins version, ditto shelf wise. And "merely"? Something you, clearly, don't ever do.

@fishbert17 8 ай бұрын

Tumescent wang

@DJames-fn3cl 8 ай бұрын

Absolutely besotted now with "yogurt rifle".

@brianpark8758 9 ай бұрын

The question that`s plagued mankind for millennia: How many terms for male genitalia can someone come up with in two & a half minutes? At last, that question has been answered.

@larryandpaul 9 ай бұрын

So many more we tried to slip in.

@daneenmurf1043 8 ай бұрын

@@larryandpaulyou managed to shove in quite a few

@berserkirclaws107 9 ай бұрын

I like to hear heart warming stories like this once in a while. Thank you for you dedicated journalism 👍

@larryandpaul 9 ай бұрын

Our pleasure. Please share!

@RobLang 9 ай бұрын

It's astounding how you manage to read that out without pissing yourself laughing.

@larryandpaul 9 ай бұрын

The outtakes are for us, and us alone!

@RobLang 9 ай бұрын

@@larryandpaul spoilsports! I bet you all drive Sinclair C5s.

@misterhoeflak 8 ай бұрын

@@larryandpaul I'm thinking an outtakes special for Christmas... come on guys, grow a couple of monumentally capacious ones and just do it! (PS Love your work.)

@tonymccake3057 9 ай бұрын

First time I've said this about one of your reports, but what a load of bollox....huge ones... In a truck. Right, I'm off to delete all photos of my Smart car on Facebook.

@Loneman_OG 8 ай бұрын

ROFL! 🤣😂👍

@PKaye-ru2ks 8 ай бұрын

The news-style intonation and cadence is 100% on point

@carlpeberdy9086 9 ай бұрын

I use public transport... Does that mean my children are actually changelings?

@clausderenda5777 3 ай бұрын

Can't get enough of the meat synonyms...😂😂

@frasersteen 9 ай бұрын

"Pump action yogurt rifle" 🤣

@wuntbedruv3477 9 ай бұрын

Just had a look down, can’t se it, is that normal?

@carlpeberdy9086 8 ай бұрын

So those people that buy those vacuum things and lots of pills, are they wasting their money when could have just bought a big car? Asking for a friend.

@larryandpaul 8 ай бұрын

Exactly!

@markkilby8931 3 ай бұрын

Boys, this one had me in tears😂. Thank you! ❤

@larryandpaul 3 ай бұрын

Our pleasure! Thank you!!

@piccalillipit9211 9 ай бұрын

*THIS IS GOING TO MAKE A LOT OF AMERICAN MEN VERY HAPPY* this is the sort of news they like, news that confirms their personal beliefs AND says big trucks a re GREAT.

@BoyeeSmudger 9 ай бұрын

Hurah! 'Merica!

@piccalillipit9211 9 ай бұрын

@@retiredbore378 HAHAHAH it probably will LOL

@the_grand_tourer 9 ай бұрын

And lacking in the faintest whiff of irony they will of course miss the satire.

@piccalillipit9211 9 ай бұрын

@@the_grand_tourer and at no point will the lack of citation strike them in any way as I thing they should be concerned about

@BoyeeSmudger 9 ай бұрын

Show them Brass Eye

@gdkjones 8 ай бұрын

I cannot IMAGINE how many takes were required to get through this without bursting into hysterics 😂😂😂

@KiltedGreen 3 ай бұрын

I never knew there were so many way to describe a man’s, you know, his, thingamabob. Amazing.

@martinstevens5892 9 ай бұрын

I laughed til I cried watching this!

@jodiesampson7283 9 ай бұрын

I need to see the outtakes from this report! Simply great work 😂😂😂😂

@the_grand_tourer 9 ай бұрын

The dead pan delivery of these guys is suspicious !

@ClassicBookASMR 9 ай бұрын

"Fizzy manfat" did make me a little nauseous, but then I don't drive...

@larryandpaul 9 ай бұрын

Took a few takes to get through that!

@FatCatFanatic 9 ай бұрын

"... according to this report ..." 🤣🤣🤣

@melvoid01 9 ай бұрын

Wankpanzer is now my new favourite word!

@tonyjones2436 8 ай бұрын

Dam, time to get rid of the ford fiesta. What a lovely story.

@uplink-on-yt 9 ай бұрын

The Heisenberg uncertainty principle applies when measuring my quantum field point-like condensate.

@wiadroman 15 күн бұрын

"glistening meat obelisk", "yogurt rifle" - how does one come up with this shit?

@tamara3984 8 ай бұрын

So ... what shall I drive as a woman or just stick to TfL, Translink, TfI, National Express, Megabus, MVV and - for having been a really bad person in a previous life - Die fucking Bahn, which never runs on time if it runs at all.

@anthonysullivan3238 6 ай бұрын

I've never laughed as much. Thank you.

@larryandpaul 6 ай бұрын

This is nice - thank you! Please do share it!

@anthonysullivan3238 6 ай бұрын

Will do. I've been laughing all day watching your posts. Brilliant stuff. Thanks again.

@skullduggerysmiles8393 9 ай бұрын

A lovely story.

@logjam88 8 ай бұрын

Can confirm.

@greggles2412 9 ай бұрын

“Throbidity”.

@adrianrutterford762 9 ай бұрын

Thanks Guys. A lovely story.

@larryandpaul 9 ай бұрын

Thanks oh god please share the link!

@VideoMikeA4 9 ай бұрын

You know this to be true… Or something.

@EthanKristopherHartley 9 ай бұрын

I think we need a community poll to decide whether we think it's Larry or Paul who's just put a down payment on a new Hummer... 😉 😁

@larryandpaul 9 ай бұрын

Product placement? Us????

@RevdKathy 8 ай бұрын

I was wondering which of them got their sensible city car trashed by a range rover in the waitrose car park and wanted revenge.

@Chroxity3 5 ай бұрын

After watching this while riding my bike no-handed, my ding dong turned into my obese neighbor Frank’s pinky toe, yes; the one with two dog-piled nails and a bottleneck, with two little steamed peppercorns that smell like numbing oil from a Szechuan restaurant serving watery coke that tastes like a polish child’s tears made into a cup of Folgers produced by a local hipster that’s scared of turning forty in June.

@johnmckie6563 8 ай бұрын

Oh Lord they was hilarious!

@wilfredsterling2124 9 ай бұрын

Lovely story!! I was throbbing with delight!! You've done some great marketing those for those vehicles!! If you want to look big and be thought of as big elsewhere, go buy a truck!!

@VespaT5 9 ай бұрын

What does this mean for articulated truck drivers?

@larryandpaul 9 ай бұрын

Larger trousers.

@iandawe948 9 ай бұрын

A lot of baby winkys in the aldi car park this morning

@bergnijlpaard 9 ай бұрын

A story to warm the cockles of one's heart and leave one perpetually tumescent.

@weswheel4834 9 ай бұрын

Flabber-Jacker :D Thanks for the video, lads.

@hedleythorne 4 ай бұрын

Superb.

@ArghansMordonMarghek 8 ай бұрын

What does it say, about all of the women who drive these ridiculous Chelsea tractors, especially when they don’t leave the city, unless they’re on a jet???

@bjmorley 9 ай бұрын

RIMS 😂😂

@larryandpaul 9 ай бұрын

Good spot.

@oddball_the_blue 9 ай бұрын

So what of those that own both a huge SUV and a small runaround?

@markiliff 8 ай бұрын

You can now get pills to cure a small runaround

@davidpanton3192 9 ай бұрын

I don't drive so all is explained.

@dianedixon5545 9 ай бұрын

Crying 😂😂😂 this is the best yet. And so factual guys 😛 Lovely story!!

@larryandpaul 9 ай бұрын

Thank you! Please share!

@dianedixon5545 9 ай бұрын

@@larryandpaul I have indeed (selectively!!) 🤣

@compostboomtron9001 8 ай бұрын

This is the funniest take on ~large car~ well-endowed drivers I've ever seen

@snubbedpeer 6 ай бұрын

Sort of the same thinking as the Cerne Abbas giant then 😉

@lookoutleo 9 ай бұрын

That was brilliant :)

@nickcornwell473 9 ай бұрын

Oh God, this made me laugh. Sheer genius.

@larryandpaul 9 ай бұрын

Thanks! Please do share!!

@davegan69 9 ай бұрын

Fking hilarious as always. 😂 You guys remind of the good days when Chris Norris was on TV presenting Brass Eye!!!

@adrianpilcher703 8 ай бұрын

Not quite up to the incredible heat seeking moisture missile, but close.

@ChrispyNut 3 ай бұрын

OIC, it makes sense why their always total and complete . It's because, just as with their monster trucks, they can never find a parking space large enough, unless they use the restricted area, or hunt around for coach parking bays, which rarely results in them parking somewhere they'd to be. Thankfully, I walk most times, so have no need for parking, or cycle and there's [insecure] parking all over the place for me.

@garethaethwy 9 ай бұрын

After extensive personal research conducted down Otterspool on a Saturday night, I can confirm that the report is very much true...

@user-wk1mw9nj3i76 8 ай бұрын

I don’t know how they managed to get through all the script with a straight face.

@Tailspin80 9 ай бұрын

Hilarious, but did the report have anything to say about Chelsea tractor female drivers?

@larryandpaul 9 ай бұрын

We don't yet have the resources for that investigation.

@philipmurphy2 9 ай бұрын

That was Larry and Paul, You up to date

@andrewwoodgate3769 9 ай бұрын

100% true

@surfury 8 ай бұрын

Why isn't this being reported on BBC News ?

@larryandpaul 8 ай бұрын

The mainstream media fails us again.

@ColchesterPT 9 ай бұрын

Youghurt Rifle! Excellent!

@SuzanneO707 9 ай бұрын

Thanks for the info👍 The Range Rover theory isn't true , lol. Lovely story. I won't be sharing it with my Great Aunt Mildred, this time. If that is okay.😏

@DanielleKingdjdinosaur 9 ай бұрын

nano nubbin

@annamari7863 8 ай бұрын

Gosh! It made me chuckle, but what is this á propos to? You don't like big cars? (I sure don't.)

@markfolan3079 9 ай бұрын

😂😂👏👏👏

@djtaylorutube 9 ай бұрын

Please can you do one for Tesla drivers? asking for a friend.

@larryandpaul 9 ай бұрын

Electric Penises.

@djtaylorutube 8 ай бұрын

@@larryandpaul I think those are sold at Ann Summers? 😁

@davidthorne2965 8 ай бұрын

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

@misterhoeflak 8 ай бұрын

Also, is that a hairy, capacious bollock on Larry's lapel? Or just an emotional support accessory?

@Cancun771 9 ай бұрын

One-eyed trouser snake alert

@jackrainbow560 8 ай бұрын

Bad news for carsalesmen, then. You can't sell a big car to a small nob. What about women who own big cars and macho trucks? What do they have, anyway?