You’re very welcome Shannan! I’m glad you’re finding the videos useful. 🙏

Yes I have a separate video on that point based on scholarship by Bhikkhu Anālayo here: kzfaq.info/get/bejne/fLygl9Kfm7-poo0.html

Wonderful! Thank you for linking it, I'll watch now. I'm finding your videos very accessible to a complete novice looking to refocus and improve my role in the world and how I view myself. I really appreciate you taking the time to note in your meditation videos that many people experiencing mental distress find it very hard to be sympathetic, compassionate, or kind to themselves.

You’re very welcome Noel, glad they are of help to you!

Yes, it's a big difference!

You’re very welcome Desi Cows! Thanks for the comment. 🙏🙂

Thanks and you as well xiao mao, as well as all beings. 🙏

That's a very wise attitude Rufus. I wish I could say I found it easy to feel compassion towards those who cause harm to others, but all too often my anger gets in the way. It is something I work on. 🙏

@@DougsDharma it took me years to develop that attitude. I should also point out that anger is still often my default emotional response to unskilled behavior - I have simply become skilled at letting go of anger when it arises and then feeling compassionate after taking a few moments to think things through rationally. If you practice skillfully you should be able to do that as well. The main 2 practices I used was 1: to watch for symptoms of psychological tension in others. In particular, looking for it in their body language, tone of voice, behavior, and overall demeanor. In people who act particularly unskillfully I can usually find restlessness, insecurity, and/or a sense of emptiness that they are trying to cover up. If nothing else, they are failing to lead as good a life as they could have from having a sense of purpose larger than themselves and from training their mind. The second practice was to try to find similarities between myself and the other person and to especially take note of similarities between their pain and the pain I have experienced in the past. The people that were aggressive towards me were either experiencing a good deal of anger or the kind of restless intoxicated state that feels like happiness but is more like the pleasure that comes from scratching an itch. Remembering my own experiences, I know full well how painful it is to lose control to anger and feel that the anger is coming from outside of us. Once we are in that state it feels rational to be aggressive towards the perceived source of our own emotions. Tortured by part of our own mind, we behave in a deluded fashion. Alternatively, with the intoxicated pseudo-happiness we are deluded into believing that what we are doing is making us happy but we are increasing the amount of stimulus/power we need to be happy and creating future experiences of boredom, restless agitation, and emptiness. Having had a videogame addiction when younger, I know full well how confusing that state of mind can be and how easy it is to falsely believe it is good for us. I also know just how much pain it causes us to experience as its effects on our mind degrades the value of our daily lives. I hope this was useful, Rufus

Yes these are excellent practices Rufus. Thanks for the suggestions!

My pleasure Kevin! 🙏

I wouldn't be surprised if that's the case Jamie, some metta practice I've heard does indeed tend to blend lovingkindness with compassion. I don't think it's a big deal to do so, they are both beneficial practices that are very closely related.

Yes exactly, it's not easy.

Thanks Judy. There are many routes towards wisdom and awakening, so I certainly don’t think there is anything wrong with focusing on lovingkindness and compassion as a regular practice. However there is more to the path than the Brahmavihāras, so insofar as you want to get closer to awakening you should probably also consider other wisdom based practices such as mindfulness and insight. 🙂

@@DougsDharma Actually this pondering has brought me back to considering if awakening is really my purpose in practice. So many bruises in psyche over the years of meditation have arisen it has seemed a wiser and gentler path to address and examine with kindnes each bruise. This has led me to Loving Kindness meditations. This has led to considering the Buddha's path. Which is why I so appreciated the beginning of the video on compassion.

I’m very glad to hear Judy. I think awakening is a very far goal for most of us householder practitioners. Lovingkindness and compassion are closer to home and fit very well into our lives. 🙏

😄😄 Very kind of you, but I'll leave that for the Ajahns, I'm just a beginner. 🙏

@@DougsDharma ❤

@@DougsDharma I'd accept you as my teacher anytime

Where is this story? So far as I know it doesn't appear in the early suttas.

@@DougsDharma I believe it is one of the Jataka tales. I've read it in a few different places.

🙏😊

Just be aware of these questions as they arise. There is no need to answer them, but sit with them and see what happens.

@@DougsDharma hello! I wonder what made you think that there's no need to answer these questions? And why do you think I'm asking them? I really enjoyed your videos, because they brought clarity to me on the issues that I thought I understood already. So it contributed to my right view and resolved some inner conflicts. Regarding some of the questions here, like the question about what purpose do brahma viharas play in context of awakening. I think if I understand this clearly, then I think it will motivate and strengthen my practice. I've been practicing meditation daily for about 6 years. But for a long time I mostly focused on meditation and virtue, without giving much attention to the heart practices like metta or compassion. Only recently I started practicing them. And if I know what benefits they have, I will probably be even more motivated to continue practicing them. Right now, I'm a little bit confused, because I heard you saying that compassion didn't play a very big role in Buddha's awakening. So one part of me is asking, what's the point then? Maybe I should just focus on Shamatha and Vipassana. That's why I was asking you since I saw that your knowledge on the subject is deeper than mine. Your answer left me perplexed to be honest.

Lovingkindness is for everyone, though traditionally it does not involve eros; it's much more akin to agape if we are talking ancient Greek ideas of love.

Hello Marko, yes I will talk a bit about that in my next video. 🙂

I'm sure Doug will do a good job in his next video, but in the meantime, recall that the Buddha did not teach that you should be happy "for" a person. It is a virtue to wish all beings happiness, but sometimes their best course is to let them learn a lesson, even if it's a hard one. Wishing others to be happy in a Buddhist context means that they will behave according to the Dharma and not abuse others for you cannot be happy if you violate the Dharma. Don't cling to the wish for others to be happy. Somewhere in the Pali Canon is the story of Devadatta. He attempted to kill Buddha. Buddha did not attempt to rescue Devadatta from his fate in hell. Would Devadatta be happy in hell? Buddha foresaw that Devadatta would be purified by that experience and ultimately would be happy. Recall that Buddha did not even want to teach the path to happiness and freedom because people would resist his dharma. In Christian terms, you would wish for all beings to have their revelation like Paul on the Road to Damascus. For Buddhists, the equivalent is to find the Dharma and act accordingly. If someone chooses otherwise, then that is their choice and your wishes will not rescue them. You must let them go.

Thanks Crow! Great points all.

@@SBCBears yes, still they say that the best way for practice the third one is to look for people who found happiness in their lives and what Buddha used for Devadatta was the equanimity the last immeasurable, we are all made and led by out own Karma so we all will eventually learn one way or the another

That's a very insightful essay Gary, thanks for the link. Yes, I think empathy can become exhausted all too easily, which is one reason why in the early texts, compassion was actually quite a different practice than empathy. For more on this see: kzfaq.info/get/bejne/fLygl9Kfm7-poo0.html