Thanks so much for watching! If you're interested in learning more social season etiquette, then definitely watch this video on making those required social calls: kzfaq.info/get/bejne/h9qco82ExNSroIk.html

I feel especially sorry for the girl's of poorer (if still comparatively wealthy) families who could only afford to do a single season. The pressure to get a husband in those four months must have been immense and probably led to some rushed and ultimately pretty unhappy marriages.

Knowing that balls generally didn't start until 10 or 11pm just puts the whole Cinderella "gotta leave by midnight" situation into perspective. Whereas as a child, you're like "midnight is SO LATE, that's more than enough time to spend with Prince Charming!"

I love the fact that when my family went to London we had a picnic in Hyde Park, not because we knew the history of it but because it was a lot cheaper than going to a restaurant for lunch. Im lowkey depressed this didnt result in my marriage to an Earl in hindsight.

For some reason I feel like getting dressed up and eating picnic food.

Having to do all of that sounds like torture to my introvert soul! On a positive note, I really enjoy your videos. 😊 Thank you for another great one!

I can't imagine having one (or more) grueling seasons, accepting the first (possibly only) marriage proposal you receive from a man you have had a handful of meetings with, and then having to take on the job of helping to run his household! And how did you KNOW he actually had the money he appeared to have and wasn't in debt up to his eyeballs / had a gambling problem, etc.?

I’m starting to understand Mr. Darcy at a visceral level. I’d be grumpy about it all too. (Yes I know different eras, but the social expectations were similar.)

Could you consider making a video about noble men's mistresses? You mentioned the opera lady being the prince's princess & I'd love your analysis on the subject!

Remember that most of the clothes were remade for the next season, or redone for younger siblings. For instans, a good woolen coat could be taken apart, turned inside out and put together again. Many of the fabricks that were used was dobble wowen. eks: red and green plaids on one side, opposit colours on the other side. A really good seamstress could work miracles with an out of fashion dress.

Ellie should write a choose your own adventure book based on victorian marriage season.

I loved this video. Could you do a video showing The Season from the view of an eligible young man? How much did it cost to deck out your sons? Did they get presented in court? Were they ever "on the shelf"? Did they have social obligations? Like walking in the park, going to dances or balls, or networking with wealthy older men who might have eligible daughters? Did these young men even WANT to get married? At what age did they go to the London Season? Did young men breaking into upper society work hard to get into a fancier club, in order to network? At what age did men join a club? Was it acceptable to "play the rake", meeting with actresses, or ladies of "questionable reputation"? If you weren't very rich would that hurt your reputation? (I'm sure the extremely rich young gentleman could consort with whomever he pleased without effecting his eligiblity). Suffice to say, I have lots of questions about how The Season effected men!

Rich people are ridiculous no matter the era.

I couldn't imagine myself doing any of this, I'd go directly to cat lady status. This sounds exhausting. You, on the other hand, are an amazing story teller.

Miss Dashwood, would you consider making a video on the “pecking order” of catches? Curate, Lieutenant, Naval Captain, etc? It seems fairly simple to follow Mr. Such and Such with 30,000 per year but the who part of it is more lost on modern readers.

My wife and I watch your videos over coffee or tea. This one was an eye opener. Had no idea at how expensive in today’s money having our daughter out in society would cost. But being in the manufacturing class it probably wouldn’t be our world. We would be doing the same as now, having coffee or tea but reading it in the times not watching a tablet. Great video.

Marriage Season sounds like a lot of work and stress!

My great grandmother was a debutante. I can’t imagine what it would have felt like to live in that era

I need an entire day to gear myself up to a party, and take days to recover from it, and then refuse to go to anymore for ages, several months of nothing but parties is FUCKING TERRIFYING!

The more I think about it the more the Victorian marriage season resembles getting into a fancy university these days, take or add a thing.

You know, when I was younger at social events, I got really good at finding the dark corner, spare bedroom, or unused closet that I knew no one would check, just in case I needed it. The marriage season doesn't sound like it would do anything except give me an opportunity to use those skills again.

Wow. I never expected the season would cost SOOOO much. That's really 1-3%

In several books, I've read about a motherless girl being taken to London for the season by a kindly relative or friend and providing all the necessities that would entail. I wonder if that scenario is very likely to happen considering the costs involved.

I think you would find the early chapters of Agatha Christie's Autobiography of interest. Although she was born in 1890, many of the traditions were still going strong. I don't think either she or her older sister, Madge, were presented but Madge definitely had a proper "season.." But by the time Agatha was at the proper age the family's income had gone down. Her account of all this and how her mother managed to give her a season -- but in Egypt, where it was cheaper -- is very entertaining and illuminating about how the people managed who were not absolutely top, but definitely not the bottom.

For anyone interested in the American version of exactly this topic (making advantageous marriages for Victorian daughters) there's a delicious book titled "To Marry An English Lord {Tales of Wealth and Marriage, Sex and Snobbery}", which is an absolutely salacious depiction of Gilded Age life in New York City and Newport, RI. It was one of the inspirations Julian Fellowes used for Downtown Abbey. DE-LISH-USSSSS.

Such an interesting video! I would have hated doing all this forced socializing for 6 months 👀

To be fair to the gentlemen, they aren't strictly "hiding" at their clubs. Just like ladies' morning teas and at homes, gentleman's clubs are the men's socializing spots where they not only discuss and canvass for politics, but also for the menfolk to talk shop about the financial side of marriages for their sons and daughters e.g. is the place they ask around about the character and confirm the financial health of the prospective groom/bride etc (and since this is man-to-man, they might find out things that are considered too coarse or improper to be hinted at to the ladies). So basically it's just the scene of the male side of networking. Also, I cackled at the casual mention of Edward VII's mistress lmao.

I would definitely hide in the club as much as possible. I would like to see you do a collaboration with Bernadette Banner. She could make a lovely gown and you could discuss when and where it would have been worn and a little bit about the social importance of fashion.

So interesting to lern about the Englisch season! In Austria-Hungary it was the other way around: Staying in Vienna during the winter (and having the season from New Year's to after Easter) while visiting the family's castle during the summer months and well into fall.

"Giant group picnic" sounds like tailgating.

I move for a revival! 😂 Can't we all dramatically debut in sumptuous gowns at refined parties and meet handsome, well-dressed gentlemen?

WWI ended opulence, although in "Brideshead Revisited," Evelyn Waugh relates that the 1923 season was considered to be the first really good season since the war.

You know, here in Vienna we still have a ball season, though it's not in the summer but in winter (during carnaval) and it's also not about catching a husband anymore. Still, the balls at the Hofburg (the former palace of the Austrian emperors) are still sumptuous and you would love them. If ever the covid pandemic is over and you ever get a chance to come to Vienna during the season, give it a try! I guess the reason why the ball season is in winter here (apart from the Catholic tradition of carnaval) is the fact that the Austrian aristocracy has been pretty much concentrated in Vienna since the 18th century, most of them had palaces in the city, so they didn't need to come to court on purpose.

I would rather do this than a 9-5 tbh. I know I have every much unpopular opinion but I do love to get dressed up and party 😂

I’m British and I swear we all still love a good picnic on occasion. You should have seen some of the beauty spots coming out of lockdown. Picnics galore

This isn't really a difficult question. If you were exceptionally beautiful, masterfully charismatic, and jaw-droppingly rich; then _The Season_ sounds like an absolute blast. If you weren't, it sounds hella fucking stressful. It's like high school. If you were a beautiful, popular, cheerleader...life was grand.

Horse racing picnics sound like fancy 1800s tailgating parties to me! "Dinner was at 8 or 9 o'clock" Man I could not survive on nothing more than little sandwiches and tea until that late.

It's nice to see someone talk about the Victorian era without criticizing them for how sexist they were. It is a skill to be able to take historic people in their own merits rather than judging them by our standards.

Once marriages were settled in old London town and everyone returned to their isolated estates, throwing country house parties wasn't just for showing off the grand, impressive, and fancy; such entertainments also provided the opportunities necessary for assignations with people you actually fancy! You talk a good game here about finding love and romance, but game is exactly what such talk was for the most part in the upper echelons of the Victorian aristocracy. Much like men's clubs, marital matches were social fronts for big business. Once the virgin debs sacrificed for a family's wealth, name, and position popped out the obligatory heir and spare, then expectations about the ladies protecting their "honor" greatly changed, with invitations issued for house parties also covering bed-hopping games they could then play for pleasure. Women couldn't openly do just anything or anyone they wanted, but as long as they were discreet and followed the rules Regency/Victorian aristocracy had for everything (even adultery) and bedded down those of breeding, then there wasn't much of a fuss over the affairs, with even the exact paternity of those later children not in the heir line too much math for them to bother their heads calculating. It was even advantageous in some cases for men to be open to loaning out wives to those of higher rank and station. While she would NOT have approved of that sort of arrangement, one should always remember that Queen Victoria had a markedly lusty nature, a reputation that was so well known it was even used to lampoon her in political cartoons. She was her own kind of example about women actually enjoying sex that was also part of the era that we wrongly envision with the image of women as asexual floats in corsets and crinolines who lay back in bed thinking only of England!

I'm curious about the venues in which it was acceptable for a man to propose (besides sneaking off into the gardens at a ball). Could you do it in front of other people? How did they manage if not, given that they weren't generally allowed to be alone together? I'd love a video on Victorian marriage proposals.

As an introvert, the season sounds absolutely horrifying to me. I do have one question: in the public events, was there any provision for women to go pee when they needed to? Or were they expected to hold it all day? Nowadays we expect some sort of bathroom facilities, but I'm not sure that was provided then. I do remember reading once that one of the innovations at the Crystal Palace was pay toilets.

It's all sounds very exhausting, thank god i'm a peasant living in 21st century

I laughed when you mentioned no picnic food at the opera because Glyndebourne Opera became a big part of upper class English society in the 20th century and that involves a picnic 😅😅

I would be totally screwed if I had to rely on my parents choosing a husband for me 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️.

I’d rather be a part of a season than just marrying a cousin because you had to keep the money in the family.

Being a morning person, I like to see the sunrise at the beginning of the day, not the end! So all that just sounds exhausting!

I can't even imagine the indecision! What if you like someone on your first Season but you're not too sure and there's always next year to maybe find the love of your life but then you might lose your first choice because you didn't snap him up when you had the chance and now it's been three Seasons and no one else is asking and soon you'll be on the shelf....😫😱😆

It sounds exhausting! Constant parties, walking, dressing, talking, polite flirting, and all the minute details that or took to"work the season".

Partying sounds fun, husband hunting doesn't 😅

I love these videos and looking forward to new ones! But yeah, this season sounds very exhausting, especially if you're an introvert. forced socializing for 6 months, my goodness! And what did women do once they were married? Did they still go to these events?

Anyone else make the connections between the races and the American trend of meeting your high school sweetheart at a football game? Also the picnics remind me of tailgating. The more things change the more they stay the same I guess.

Socializing from April to August, only stopping to sleep (maybe) and changing your clothes (with the help of a maid I presume). My biggest nightmare. I would've become a cat lady

History is my most favorite subject, all through high school and even through to this day. It’s just so fascinating.

As a fellow high-pitched voice gal, I feel you on the sore throat from talking. I recommend taking to a voice coach. We tend to use our the wrong muscles when we talk.

While this looks like a nightmare for me, a introvert, for some reason I feel that If I was a debutant who was a part of higher class and had a mother like mine as my chaperone, I probably could be married very quickly and on my first season ever, hahaha. My mother has awesome networking skills, so...

As an introvert this all sounds like my personal hell except for the fashion part

Some of this leads me to wonder about Jane Bennett in P&P. She was beautiful, refined, and goes about a year between the Mr. Bingley interactions yet does not meet up with another suitor in all that time. This even with spending a few months in London with the Gardiners, her aunt and uncle, who presumably have engagements she would have participated in. While they were not upper class/rich, it seems they had enough to have Jane be involved in some of ‘the season’ activities and so I found it unrealistic to have her languish for nearly a year (in the story) without progressing socially as to the marriage state or possible suitors. Those are my thoughts - thanks for the video!

Awwww, I was hoping you'd mention Eliza Doolittle’s iconic dress from the Ascot race scene in My Fair Lady (I realize that was slightly later but it’s just SUCH a good dress)

Picnic-ing sounds fun ! The line from Ever After popped into my head "I'm just here for the food" 😆😅

I imagine the top 1% still spend enormous sums on clothing each year... Designer dresses don't come cheap.

Aaah yes, riding and walking - the beneficial exercises that hopefully give you enough leg muscle to do all the fancy court curtsies...

watching this video made me realize that if my family were ever apart of the 1% they would be in and out of their heads with the price of 4 daughters, although the chance of us four very awkward ladies getting married would be slim if not non existent.

Unfortunately I’m at that point where I’ve watched every one of your videos so now I’m just rewatching until I’m once again blessed with your upload notification, which has actually never happened before, I’ve never watched every single video on someone’s channel before, so you should certainly feel very loved, lmao

Had a slight camera shaking problem and I started getting worried about earth quakes or fracking tremors hitting you. Another excellent video. I'm gonna have to start a playlist for my own regency/victorian education needs.

I just discovered your channel today and it's so informative! I love the way you explain everything and now all my Jane Austen and Barbara Cartland readings make so much more sense :) love from France!

Dancing at Balls wasn't much fun to many people in too little space, and I thought the Mosh pit wasn't invented until the 1980's!!!

Girl, you’re so funny! 🦋 (laughing tears watching your spin on things) I love everything Victorian and you are making such awesome videos about it! 🌸

This is soooo helpful!!! It clears up so much when watching period dramas!!

Love that you have good art from the era----James Tissot!

As many kids as my parents have (4 daughters including me & 4 sons), we’d be broke during the debutant season because my sister would have DEFINITELY had expensive taste in the gowns while I would have chosen something more simple

One of your most enjoyable talks! Love the little dig at Lillie Langtry. Also would love to hear you explain that for every event you had to wear a different dress suitable to the occasion. Even if you were at home, you wouldn't wear a morning dress in the afternoon or vice versa. There were really strict standards on what was considered appropriate attire for any event at any specific place or time of day. That was why it was so expensive to outfit a girl; all that money was needed for all those dresses and accessories. Probably you wouldn't even want to wear the same dress twice!

Socializing all day and having to spend so much money on dresses sounds horrible but after this video I desperately want to be a debutante 😩

Both. You didn't have much entertainment back then so it sounds fun. But you can't ignore the pressure and how expensive it was. It might have been too stressful to have fun

I have a friend in England who did talk about cotillion season, starting up around May and going through the Summer.

I've always wanted to know more of the ins and outs of "the season", and other things I could only piece together and guess about in British social history. One thing that always confused me, was how late these balls began in the pre-electricity age. Just traveling in the dark from one place to another would seem like a big deal, yet they seemed to do it. There also was some thing about the tilt of the Earth in summer in England and Scotland where I'd read remarks like, "It never gets dark here". I'd like to understand more about it.

The reason why I am intrested in Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice is that it occured in the middle of The First Industrial Revolution. Men like Mr. Darcy with a surplus of financial resources are probably the ones who financed enterpreneurs and innovators like John Kay, James Hargreaves, Richard Arkwright, Abraham Darby, Benjamin Huntsman, Henry Cort and Henry Bessemer and a slew of other movers and shakers of a revolution that caused the Western Nations to be the hegemons of the whole planet Earth.

Your videos are so, so informative and interesting. Thank you for everything you're doing for us!!

Very well done! You have a great mixture of serious historical narrative and tongue-in-cheek distance to the dating and mating rituals of times gone by.

I feel so many people are hating on the season but it seems to quite lovely. I mean these ladies are sitting for months with no other interactions and no option to partake in many outdoor activities since the weather is quite cold so the season seems like their one chance to actually mingle and meet on a large scale. I feel like maybe hearing it sounds overbearing but I think I would love to join in on this event…

Your comments at the end about a debutante being on the shelf reminded me of the panic endured by the receding chances at a match by character Georgiana Longstaffe in The Way We Live Now by Anthony Trollope!

You omitted the visit to one of the fashionable Pleasure Gardens which was uncommon enjoyable from the point of view of mixing with the peasantry and flaunting you riches in a more risqué atmosphere

Amazing how things have changed so much but also not much at all. Melbourne cup horse race is such a huge event. My town runs huge events just to watch it on TV, and you need to get invited or pay alot of money to go. And you dress fancy, eat tiny sandwiches and ignore the race to socialise.

Well that sounds like my own personal nightmare, lol. What I'm curious about is how people in more humble circumstances found spouses, maybe a future video on that?

I love your videos! You have such a talent to bring the victorian era to life - very funny, informative and interesting.

I would hopefully been rich enough to turn into an eccentric old maid. The kind that gave a sassy answer for why they were not married. I saw some zingers in Tid- Bits magazine.

Nice to know that historical novels I have read have been accurate. (Extra appreciation for Amanda Quick!)

If someone wanted to deliberately wreck their marriage chances because they didn't want to for some reason, without their parents realizing that was their intent, how would someone go about it?

A Season sounds like a lot of fun. But also, super exhausting. you gotta be 100% in the game all the time. All.the.time. every unmarried man is a target and you gotta be your very best to each one while also not trying to outdo all of your "Friends" I'm sure it was a very delicate dance since you're trying so hard to be friends with everyone to get those invitations and introductions. But those friends may also have their own daughters to marry off. Or if you get on the bad side of one of the other girls she could whisper to her mother something and you find yourself not invited to their next shindig. Lots of putting on airs and yet being humble. Stressful. Expensive. Hard work. Yikes. But I'd love to spend a whole season back then just watching it all play out around me.

Cinderella's ball is making all kinds of sense now. And Eliza Doolittle's Ascot disaster. And Henley collar shirts.

The modern day equivalent of all this is Award Season in Hollywood. Award show after award show, red carpets, gown after gown. Everyone trying to out do each other, some trying to be controversial in their outfit choices

What a charming video! Thank you!

I'm excited for the video about social calls!

This video was amazingly informative. I used to read trashy Regency/Victorian romance novels as a teen. Inevitably written by Americans 🙄. They spoke endlessly of balls (always balls, never dances, or receptions), occasionally morning calls, Hyde Park strolls, dinner parties, or the theater. The various sporting events? NEVER mentioned. They rarely even mentioned officially meeting the Queen at court. Networking with women? Rarely mentioned. Usually the wide-eyed heroine met the dashing brooding hero in an implausible way that would have utterly ruined her reputation in the actual Victorian age.

Hi. I’ve recently subscribed to your channel and I love it and I was wondering if you’d covered the topic of travel in the regency and Victorian eras? How people travelled from place to place and what the different styles of carriages that they could afford depending on their class of course?

Execellent video some of these things can even be applied today with some adaptions eg driving in the park to cycling/jogging

I just found this channel, what a blessing!

Does anyone want a video game based on this?

Honestly aside from the expense and pressure to marry a man (i’m a lesbian), the victorian marriage season sounds incredibly fun. if i didn’t have to marry a man and money weren’t any issue, i think i’d greatly enjoy it.

In Oscsr Wilde’s play “Sn Ideal Husband” one of the characters devlarr the Season as a world composed of brilliant lunatics and beautiful idiots.

"Spending 150.000 dollars for one womans wardrobe for one season was a minimum" *Looks at what wedding dresses costs* Yea, seems to still be in effect. Edit: Hope you find a way to fix that shaky cam.