1. Of COURSE I bought them lil ice trays to make tiny ices!! 2. The brand didn't end up doing the campaign as a whole, but they circled back to tell me my pitch was fire. 🤷🏿‍♀ 3. I literally haven't even LOOKED at the notes I wrote from that book since June pahahaha. 4. There have been spam bots using my profile picture in my comments section. PLEASE MARK THEM AS SPAM AND DON'T CLICK ANY LINKS!

Not me getting the same book last year, posting it in my story for accountability and still not completing it because lifeeeeeeeeeeeeee . I finally found the will to take my trash out and it took four trips. I started a somatic practice earlier this year because anxiety all day is ghetto. Every upload you’ve done in the last month has made me feel a little less alone, more understood. I hope you feel supported by us and you are not alone sis

Yo when you asked, "How many years can you be at a crossroad??"... I felt that. 100% lol.

You are fulfilling your mission right now. You are helping people pull themselves up out of that sunken place. The more you share your authentic journey, the more you are stepping into your Earth mission. You are helping to spread love and light across the world by showing how you are fighting your way out of your own darkness/fog. Kudos! Keep up the incredible work Evelyn

Cousin, you are “ at a crossroads” your entire life! I see that as transitioning and we are always in transition until we listen to ourselves and take the next step. Then it starts all over again. And That! That! Is what makes me feel constantly uneasy😰 I just stumble upon the next step most times 🤷🏽‍♀️

The 12 week thing is a good idea. In college I was always so shocked about how quickly I could pick up programming languages and start building programs. My semesters were about 12-14 weeks long and I didn’t even have that class everyday. I’m not gonna lie I miss that structure and I’m trying to incorporate the 12 weeks idea to help build my portfolio.

I cannot even pretend I'm a "creative" because I'm not but I own my own business for over a decade now and I've settled on just being good at that. There may be a lot of things I want to get into but I settle on what I'm doing thus far that has made me successful. You are seriously one of the funniest people I've run across on KZfaq. People watch other people take showers and clean their house and I would watch you just make your lil meals and crack random funny jokes and do smack yo lip and Mama Jessica for years to come. You have a lot of subscribers I bet who feel that same way. I hate you feel that you aren't in your most creative space but for us and the people watching you, you will be surprised that keeping it simple would be good for us and maybe in the long run good for you too!

thank you for sharing these!! so grateful. i remember watching your like bullet journaling, sticker-making, meal-making etc type videos back during the pandemic, and thinking..... fuck why am i no good at any of this? a relief to remember we're all human and move through different periods of "on top of it" and "drowning in it".... sometimes (for me) all at the same time 😭

I think I've been at a crossroad for like 5 years 😂😂😂😭😭😭

Going through your old videos to sort of process how you got to your energy low is helping me realize how I feel very similarly low on energy, and it helps me process too. Thanks for allowing us in to see how it's been for you

The part about struggling to start something is me. I know what to do to get started, but don't implement anything, then regret not starting when I should have. I get bursts of motivation for about five minutes. If I don't take advantage of it, it disappears.

‘I struggle to understand what I’m doing ever’ story of my life for the last I dunno 3 years. You maybe at a cross roads but that cross roads is inspiring to others like myself. I discovered your channel only in 2020 and couldn’t believe it took me that long because you are hands down one of the best out here.

These are so comforting to watch! Thank you for providing this space on the interwebs! I also ate breakfast today, it was at 3PM, but I got there eventually. :) Have a nice day

I haven't even finished watching this vlog, but I just want to say how much you sharing yourself like this with the world. I'm watching this vlog while folding laundry that I've been avoiding for days. There's literally transformative, supportive power in you sharing your vulnerability like this and I appreciate it to much. I love you and that's all. I wish for you nothing but EVERYTHING you desire.

Thx SO MUCH Evelyn for being SO TRANSPARENT with us, especially about the depression! I have struggled for years and it's ROUGH! I'm glad you are giving yourself grace and actually listening to your body! Sidgebar: I SO RESONATED with the struggle to shower/maintain self care! We're sending you positive vibes & prayers!

Yes you should buy the ice tray w the little ice cubes. It comes in handy a lot! And goes in most water bottles and it’s easy to dump and refill and comes w a scooper! Edit: lol I forgot that you said you got them. I hope it brings u joy

Got damnit Evelyn. Though it might seem like your stuck. You are always going even if you don't be knowing where specifically. We just gotta trust that and know this is just the season to figure shit out, even if we come up empty. Just don't stop.

Love you, don’t comment regularly but I have to say there’s no one like you. You’re such a gift. Such a joy. Truly unique, lovely & captivating. How you’re sharing and documenting this part of your journey is so organic and relatable. The authenticity is authenticitying and it’s appreciated.

The “it’s giving if lil Debbie made churros, low quality” made me bust out laughing cuz damn I know that making ur own drink disappointment too well 😂😂😂

The more I watch the more I see how alike we are and it makes me inspired that you were able to even film these segments during all the struggle times - gives me hope that I can push myself a bit more to accomplish my goals. Thank you for being so transparent and I love all your stuffs, you’re the best!

First. I know that you’re dealing with challenges, but I really love seeing you and I enjoy just watching you exist! You’re precious, and thank you for continuing to create and share your life! Second, try half and half with your tea next time. It slaps for me you might like it as well. My ratio is 3/4 cup of tea to 1/3 cup half and half. I hope it works for you too!

The most relatable KZfaq content creator I've ever watched and subscribed to in my life! I appreciate you so much Evelyn and wish you a definite path to fulfillment!! ❤️🙏🏽

I'm really resonating with these videos because they remind me of when I transitioned from being functionally depressed to just being plain ol depressed. I spent a lot of weeks similarly trying to figure out my "out". Now I think I'm at the stage where I realize that I can't "product" my way out of depression and sometimes I just have to sit with it. If this doesn't apply then you can just ignore, but I hope you get better soon Evelyn and remember: you're not crazy, you're not lazy, you're not behind; sometimes things just get interrupted.

Evelyn, you’re so relatable. Your reflection and transparency is appreciated. Crossroads have no limit. The minute you move pass one you start a new one. Sending you love and light. You’ve got this👏🏾👏🏾💛

Giiirl sure. The footage is from June but I am PROUD of you for editing and posting. Literally a legend.

The thoughtfulness and vulnerability you have chosen to share the experience of depression. Backwards. First, is relatable. Second, is refreshing. Third, is heartbreaking. I’m feeling a lot of things but mostly grateful. Im sure it felt lost in the moment. I’m not sure… I’m guessing. But you are dope and this is follow along is beautiful crafted. I hope that light is coming. We see you trying!!!

Answering text messages can be hard for me, because I get overwhelmed! So kudos to you for getting that done ❤

Watching you makes me feel normal💖 Thank you for sharing yourself with us

Evelyn, I really appreciate your candidness, vulnerability, and humor. Thank you!

This week while out grocery shopping I saw a new iced coffee dark chocolate espresso thing and was like this is gonna be bomb and it was just real disgusting so I feel ya. That's what we get for trying something new lol

Evelyn holding up the the Buc-ees cup that makes her happy and I’m watching in the Buc-ees shirt that makes me happy

As a small business owner (industrial sector), business didn't pick up until the 5th year...we're at almost 10 years now and we're sustaining ourselves. Best of luck ✌🏽

Evelyn, I’m really intrigued by and thankful for how you’re posting these vlogs, sort of as retrospectives. It’s helpful, not only because through watching we to virtually visit with you & hear your thoughts/what you’re dealing with, etc., but also because a big part of my work is studying and theorizing about time. Particularly how melanated people engage with time. Giving us non-linear peaks into your world and how you’re getting through life is so helpful as I’m studying & theorizing about Black temporalities. How long can you be at a crossroads is such an interesting question…

Congratulations on 4 years girl. "do you know what I mean" 😂 you are so hilarious. Thanks for being so real, you help me to feel sane 👏🏾

I am being blessed by my faves this morningg

I appreciate how real you've been in these vlogs bc just reminds us we're not in these daily struggles. Hope you're kind to yourself today.

Hi Evelyn. It's so nice to see your videos again. You are hilarious!!! lol As self diagnosed ADHD, self help has helped me tremendously! I just finished 12 Week Year too and I may give it a try and see what the results look like. I highly suggest the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, so many gems in that one. I really like The Compound Effect as well (I think it's similar to Atomic Habits, but I haven't read that). As far as tools and techniques go, analog and digital planners/journals are very helpful. Write things down to get them out of your head. Smartwatches are also very helpful. The pomodoro technique has changed my life! It helps with that "just start" procrastination that we often go through and I love knowing that a break is coming. Rewarding yourself is huge. Lastly, prayer, meditation, spirituality and self care should be the foundation. Create routines so that you won't have to use your brain so much when handling daily or goal achieving tasks. Love and light to you girl! The people have to see your light! Don't stifle your gifts and talents

is this why i'm unproductive all year and then only in like october can i get my shit together? because i'm 12 week yearing myself? wow

I went out of the country for a month and I visit Evelyn’s channel to rewatch old vlogs forgetting it’s been a month and then I am pleasantly surprised/blessed with three new vlogs 😭😭

EVELYN!!! INTERNET COUSIN!! Are we the same person?? I feel just as aimless, unsure, and barely motivated. I have NO idea what all the things I know how to do will connect with my gifts and the direction God is SLOWLY, patiently, taking me in. I hope December Evelyn has better clarity❣️❣️

These weekly "getting out of a funk" vlogs are helping me so much to stay afloat, Evelyn.

3:19 That face took me tf out! 😂🤣🤣 I was like, that's way too much creamer. 😂

Damnnn I get here so quickly. We were really going through it in June. I know it was a struggle to film but thank you because I feel soo seen.

Evelyn! Thank you for sharing your journey with us all of these years. Your voice is so powerful and needed. You are hilarious and extremely talented, and extremely intelligent. When I think of your work I think of the careers of Issa Rae and Quinta Brunson. You are already so successful. Listen to your body. YOUR process is working! You are about to be a household name!❤️❤️❤️

Hahaha. I adore your content. And yes, answer to your crossroads question: forever. Forever and always. On the path, there is always a choice to make. Always. Not sure if I understood your meaning g, but that's my take. You're wonderful! Keep going virtual friend!

I lovee your vlogs. Thank you for always being so candid and sincere. thank you for taking us on this journey with you:)

I am learning too. Trying to take it easy on myself when I don't wash dishes, when I don't do my CBT workbook, when I don't read, etc. Every step is a new process.

Well, I have been in the crossroad since 2009 and there has been a lot of terraforming and bridges built, so I hope that will make you feel better? maybe? 😂I love your videos

You’ve posted so much since that original depression blog that’s amazing! I’m proud of you 🎉

I found your channel a few weeks ago, and I have never felt more seen. 🙌🏽 At this point I feel like I live at a crossroads. 🤦🏽‍♀️ I feel you on the entrepreneurship journey... people try to sell working for yourself like it's better than working for someone else, but is it really!? IDK. TBD.

Evelyn you are so naturally funny and these blogs are really helping people. So relatable. I’m an academic not an entrepreneur but being an employed scholar can feel very entrepreneurial…we have a lot to do, we have a lot of control over how and when we do it, there’s very little immediate external accountability for the tasks we need to do but those tasks are essential to our pay, promotion and career advancement. I spend a considerable amount of time in my work days, weeks, months figuring out what the hell I’m doing and what do to next. I picked this lifestyle because I wanted flexibility but all that flexibility can make you freeze cause there are so many needs and possibilities for the time. Some things that help me are getting together with people in person or zoom or leaving my house to work at a coworking space or coffee shop or something so I’m not so isolated and lost in the vortex of my mental rabbit holes, focusing on one task for a day or more even if I feel like I can’t afford to, and using that coworking time with other people for different t kinds of work: writing, course prep, logistical life management, etc., and using an online task management system rather than a million notebooks I duplicate and lose. But it’s still a struggle everyday. I am excited to try 12 week year think it will help me to not overshoot my goals. Transitions: I feel like, unscientifically life can kind of runs in up to 7 year cycles. Hope that’s not depressing. But being in transition doesn’t mean you’re not experiencing joy and important milestones for you and living life within the transition. Community: sometimes when we work an odd schedule on our own we forget that we need to talk to other humans. Responsibility: I see a lot of childless KZfaqrs express how they don’t know how parents do it-cause we have to. Caring for someone else requires me to care for myself. Having my son forces me into routine and speaking out loud to someone else everyday and getting outside and putting down the work or attempt to work at a certain point. I don’t suggest people have kids if theyre struggling but maybe something to care for: a pet, a plant or something could be helpful. Transitions: taking time to celebrate and reward myself for completing something even something small like filling out a form I procrastinated forever can help with moving on to the next thing. Thanks for these vlogs it’s refreshing to see people think and live out loud and not try to model perfection online.

Evelyn have you read Tristimania by Jay Griffiths? Its a memoir of a severe bipolar episode she survived, it's beautiful, and it has the same quality you described of her having kept records throughout what she calls her period of madness that she then processes and transforms into art when she's on the other side. It's beautifully written; one of my favourites. The way you described piecing together the vlogs your filmed this summer really reminded me of it; I think you might like it!

That low quality horchata got me 🤣🤣

Thank you for sharing with us, Evelyn! Your candidness and humor make your vlogs a joy to watch. Love the “Yes I Art” t-shirt, btw. 💗

I have adhd and I would absolutely love to see that even if it’s just once I have the same issue with starting and ending tasks and deciding what to do next

Something i'm looking forward to see now that we're nearing august/september is if Renaissance gets a video of its own

I feel so seen, we're collectively on this journey of transition my friend. Echoing all your feelings

Also, thank you for sharing your journey. I've had these same moments & convo with myself. Much appreciation to you for being so open.

I’m sooooo happy you’re back

Hi Evelyn! I've been watching your videos for a few years now. Just want to let you know that I enjoy everything you put out there. If you're ever doubting what you're doing (editing a vlog, uploading a video etc. etc.) in maybe the mundane-ness of it all - know there is someone out there on the other end, watching the culmination of your work who feels seen, has a laugh, and feels less alone in this life. So, thank you.

So grateful for your transparency Evelyn !! You're human and not alone in this 💞

This was really refreshing to see for real. Thank you for posting stuff at your own pace and about your creative process. It really helps to see others dealing with *life* and go at your own pace.

You are seriously such a joy evelyn!

Ur videos articulate that which is simmering in my mind & im so glad to hear u say it aloud, cuz it rly resonates....

I LOVE YOU - seriously there is no one like Evelyn, your energy and content always makes me smile ❤

If it’s any consolation, you’re giving very much critically acclaimed and lauded creative genius in the pre-blowup years.

I bought the tiny ice tray. I think what like most is how fast it freezes 😂. I use a lot of ice.

❤ I really needed this today! Thank you for sharing, Evelyn. I wanna believe that sometimes we just need to plateau or feel stuck for a while because it's our creativity or spirit preparing for something bigger and better. Hoping you heard good news about the project. Hoping things are going smoothly for you now. 😊

Wow the parallels. Me with me “Getting Things Done” self help book and algorithm ads about being more creative and productive. Meanwhile I’m hibernating mostly (getting up at 11ish most days) and trialing antidepressants for the first time in my life to do the bare minimums. It does feel like an issue bigger than any one of us. We live in a society (ew) and have to earn our right to live (embarrassing). We measure ourselves against silly metrics while the Earth is screaming for help. (These are definitely things a non depressed person thinks less about, so in some ways I’m like, can we just equalize and share a bit of our depressions?!) But you know what, when I sit and eat my breakfast and take my meds and watch your video, I feel inspired to keep going. “Maybe i will be less depressed later, but whatever, for now I just go step by step.” I also feel impressed because you doing a pitch or reaching any such creative business accomplishment is a huge huge thing in my perspective. (If I’m particularly insecure that I can ever do anything as impressive I get a little envious). There is a whole lot of us going thru it, and I know this, but I feel isolated from the collective - and watching your videos, then reading the comments makes me feel much less alone. Thank you for keeping it too real. Love you Cousin, and all the Cousins out there, trying.

Here for the SmackYourLip and unintentional ASMR content 😄. Some days it's the simple things of eating and showering and checking those simple things off your to-do list. Keep pushing forward little by little Evelyn, you got this internet cousin! 😁

Thank you for the vlog, Internet Cousin. When we I watch your blogs, I feel SEEN. I had a therapy appointment 3 weeks ago and it just sank that 3 weeks have past. I stayed in bed for those 3 weeks and now I have therapy later today. Transitioning is difficult and I think it’s a never ending process. Cuz your transition at one point then you have to do it again and again and again…it is exhausting. I believe in you, Cousin. I believe in all of us 💛 Take Care of yourself

Them little drinky drinks from the asian grocery stores DO be hitting.

Love that you read this book too! I read it and practiced these tenets for exactly ONE cycle, never to repeat it again. But I did end up accomplishing both tasks, it just took a few more months than I thought it would.

You know how much vlog footage I've got sitting on my computer just wasting away. Womp lol

I love seeing you living and working and smackin yo lip to good drinks. Plus I have been all about the Nap Ministry lately. I bought her book Rest is Resistance and read the whole thing and am on my second read! Really important stuff. I hope its giving you life cuz it is still giving me life.

Thanks for this info about brand deals and e-commerce. Also the transitioning issues you described was relatable. Hope you continue to work on the 12 week year and it helps you improve your productivity

ive been having a hard time too, so i really love checking in with you. thank you!

The beginning of the video was so calming Smooth jazz Needed that You’re voice is also nice .. Thanks for the vid

Off topic a smidge: your fro is looking so beautiful. I remember when you used to shave the sides. I hope this compliment makes you 🙂

You’re amazing I’m so proud 🥹

love your glasses, and THANK YOU for sharing the pitch process. hella helpful and unexpected:) also the bagel and salad were delightful to pretend i was also eating lol

LMAO @2:56 if we are not internet cousins...cuz whew chile...me too

This is sooo relatable!

My favorite vinegar/oil dressing is 21 Seasoning from Trader Joes, White Wine vinegar (also from TJ) and extra virgin olive oil (whatever is available). Buy an ice tray with a cover. HAHA. Sorry, I am just being a brat. Thanks for the this book. Keep going!!! Cheers!

Listening to the body is so very important!

Great book, I’m on week 6. Stick with it🎉

Also, your hair density and volume is just 🔥

I just ended being at a crossroads for A DECADE. I finally decided to be brave and start my channel lol

Thanks for sharing Evelyn.

I'm loving your lil drinky drinks, I definitely am too lazy to make anything that cute or (I assume) delicious! ❤

Thank you sooo much for sharing this

I have definitely tried to self help my way out of some impending doom and used the same book to do it at one point. The problem was not everything in life is scheduled on a 12 week schedule. For example I went back to school and my terms are 15 weeks long... if I could make it make sense the book would be amazing!

That lil peachy iced tea drinky drink looked so good

Wow what a truly genius mind, to excavate instead of just burying your struggles. So much appreciation from my part

You are me and I am you sis! ❤️

i dont require so much productivity out of myself because that can cause me to stall out sometimes like “paralysis by analysis” i just journal like wouldnt it be cool to do this i wonder what that would be like and if i say that a few times i might move to break that task or dream down into step and then smaller and smaller steps.. i dont carry those thoughts around w me because it can be too much idk this works for me. hope you know how great you are already and productivity is like a capitalist term to make you feel like you arent doing enough.

Sis’ drinking mix game be on point!

Yes smoothy review!

I think we're always at *some* crossroad. There are almost always alternatives we could consider, different paths we could take. Maybe the feeling of "being at a crossroad" is more about wanting to make a change, either because there's something that seems more appealing or because we're dissatisfied with our current situation.

lol i tried that cinnamon creamer too trying to be cute and it was so nasty!!!! lol i felt your reaction so much