Virtual hugs to all the addicts out there. You're not alone.

As a recovering addict, I think you are spot on...when I overdosed and woke up in ICU the doctor asked me why I did what I did and I said “to escape reality”....now I’m sober 6 years, and after completely changing my environment, I’m now close to finishing medical school!

Thank you Johan for making this.. I was on the street of L.A. for 5 years slamming fentanyl, and because my brother saw this video and showed it to my family, they started visiting me. Fast forward a bit, after having 2 surgeries from an infection on my spine, I got an infection on my heart and had a stroke and basically woke up in the hospital.. I now have 200+ days clean, which is the longest I've been clean for since I was 13.. all this to say that without this video and your studies on the subject, they wouldn't have visited me on the street. Thank you.. -- Chris Moran Thank you EVERYONE. Just to update you all, I have over a year clean now and am a Data Analyst for work! -- Chris Moran

“The opposite of addiction is not sobriety. The opposite of addiction is connection.” Hit the nail right on the head, thank you ❤️

I believe that loneliness is what fueled my addiction.

"if you can't bond because you're traumatised, isolated or beaten down by life, you will bond with something that will give you some sense of relief"

Psychedelics are just an exceptional mental health breakthrough. It's quite fascinating how effective they are against depression and anxiety. Saved my life.

"Using because you can't bear to be present in your own life." Thank you so much for this video. I really needed to hear this and I'm sitting here crying as I feel my perspective shift about the addicts in my life. Thank you

Everyone of us that searched and clicked this video has become aware of themselves and wants to change. Good luck everyone, much love

The opposite of addiction is connection. Profound.

I started smoking weed since my teenage. Got addicted to Crack for over 23 years. I suffered severe depression and mental disorder. Not until my wife recommended me to psilocybin mushrooms treatment. Psilocybin treatment saved my life honestly. 8 years totally clean. Never thought I would be saying this about mushrooms.

I just got out of detox after relapsing after 17 years of sobriety and we watched this video in there. So spot on. Addiction is lonely. We need connection.

Now imagine if everybody was isolated for weeks or months...

So spot on. My addiction progressed the more alone I became.

As a 24 yr old addict myself, I have not a single soul to fall back on, to vent to, to connect with, etc. I’ve been traumatized and abused my entire life and never wanted to be an addict. My whole world flipped upside down after leaving a long term abusive relationship and tried meth for the first time. 2 years later, I haven’t stopped despite the desire and conscious knowledge of wanting to recover. I have no one that tells me they love me or are there for me, and I’m lonely with no human interactions in my daily life. I absolutely hate it and want connections with others. I have changed my toxic mindset completely over the past 4 years and nobody sees me for how I am now, only how I was as a child and young teen. I hope I can take the steps to recover for myself. I don’t want to lose my life or travel this path forever. I’m thankful for this video and the people that have commented. ❤you all, addicts or not. You matter & you’re seen.

This made me cry. Children need to be taught in public school about mental health and therapeutic tools to cope from trauma and family dysfunction, self awareness and mindset, because a society that emphasizes maths and science while neglecting the human condition does not provide the basic human skills/education for a functioning adult in society no matter how great their SAT score, nor does it allow us to become a great society and reach our human potential. I felt I didn’t get enough connection growing up from my parents, and I have an “addictive personality.” I think we need to teach and emphasize more public education about communication skills, coping skills, and healthy relationships.

Being an addict in recovery, I quit trying to explain what addiction is to non-addicts a while ago. Im thankful for this video, its spot on.

"The opposite of addiction is not sobriety. The opposite of addiction is connection." This gave me all the feels 😭♥️

I used to be addicted to heroin and cocaine but now I don’t do any drugs. Just had to break away from that AA/NA mindstate and stop telling myself “I’m recovering”, Instead I just started telling myself the truth which is “I just don’t do drugs anymore so I’m already recovered”. After someone quits smoking they don’t sit around talking about smoking and referring to themselves as “recovering smokers”, They just say “I don’t smoke” and move on with their life. The words you use can and will subconsciously reinforce the thought that you’re giving something up, Or the thought that there’s nothing to give up at all.

Wow, this is exactly what I needed to hear. I’m a current addict, and the clarity this have given me is profound. I can and will beat my addiction

40 days sober today and I can tell you I'm grateful to be on the other side of this addiction.

As a meth addict this hit me hard at the end. I'm alone and need people like you in my life but nope everyone looks and judges me instantly.. sad truth. Great talk thank you.

That's so interesting to me. I have had depression on and off for a few years now. I think this also explains depression quite nicely. You see, my room is a mess, my grades are a mess,...my life is a mess. Yet I never wanted to get up because I have no friends, and my family did not try and reach out and help me. I always feel so lonely, and that I am worth nothing. My family, especially my mom, would make fun of me to other people. Talk behind my back intentionally so that I would hear what she says about me. Everything I say, my parents look at each other and make me feel as if I am crazy. My mom would tell my friends about how messy I am, how I am a terrible child. I ended up feeling isolated and unwanted, as she always told me she wished I was not her daughter and that some one else's child is. It was the fact that she said this so calmly and final that it unnerved me. They only yell and scream at me, Shame. Shun. Belittle. I no longer feel like a person. I know that no one will see this comment, but if anyone, ANYONE, sees this, this is my cry for help.

As I sit here, as an addict, this resonates on a level most aren’t familiar with. Not to trope the male ego or stigmas, but I feel as if I’m expected to just deal with it. I do believe in hope and overcoming circumstance. Bless you all

"I don't ever wanna drink again, oh i just need a friend"- Amy Winehouse

I’m glad to see Chandler’s doing well for himself

I think this is a perfect example of how normal people view drug addiction. It's a physical allergy. Go to an AA meeting and you'll get a better understanding of what real addiction is like.

I'm an addict. And this was powerful beyond words. As soon as he said the words at the end of the video: "I love you, whether you are using or you're not. I love you whatever state you're in. And if you need me, I'll come and sit with you- because I love you and I don't want you to be alone or to feel alone." As soon as he said that, I instantly cried. Because tbh that's all I've wanted from people, especially those that I love- and I've gotten only the complete opposite of that all these years. To the point where I don't trust anyone and I have less than a handful of people I do trust and am willing to be around. I'm tired of feeling alone and I'm tired of being alone. Especially when I really could use a friend when I'm going through something that's difficult and I quite literally have no one I can feel safe to turn to for any comfort or even a listening ear. This really hits hard and right in the feels. I wish people would judge addicts less and be more willing to be open-minded and even comfort us somehow because we're not horrible people. We just need connection. We need people to support us and possibly even maybe believe in us if only just a little bit.

Crazy as it sounds it’s true 10 years ago I was a user , my mom found out after the back nd forth of arguing one day she told me “ I’ll. Be here for you regardless I love you either way” I got sober the next week . Been sober 10 years

"The drug doesn't make the drug addict, its the need to escape reality"

My brother struggled with alcohol use and first time we sent him to rehab, it was useless. In a few months, he experienced alcoholic psychosis and decided to go sober. It's one year since and he is doing well. All through the journey, my family stood like a rock behind him. Made him feel valued and loved.

I watched this July 16, 2019 July 17, 2019 was my first day of sobriety and I’m about to hit five years. This TEDTalk quite literally saved my life.

Who else is holding Portugal in extremely high regard after watching this?

What is ironic about the US is that it banned drugs, but in entertainment, arts, etc, Americans relentlessly send out the message that drugs are cool, even desirable.

This hits hard. My dad lost his battle to addiction an exact month after my 19th birthday and as I was just getting into college. I never knew how to deal with his addiction but I know he struggled everyday. He always tried his best for his daughters. I wish he had more time on this earth so that I could show him more compassion in his trying times and maybe it would have helped him get better in the end.

This made me rethink the distance I've put between me and a family member who is an addict. I don't know if I can trust them again but the least I could do is love and support them.

The ending made me cry. This is beautiful, a very accurate way to explain the way addiction feels. “The opposite of addiction isn’t sobriety, the opposite of addiction is connection.”

I'm an addict 59 years old 15 years abstinent since May 10th 2004 Thanks for the 12 steps

Telling addicts you love them no matter what is so important. My best friend since childhood left me in my lowest times (I understand why she did - i was a nightmare) but it really sent me spiraling into a darker place. Being friends with an addict is tough - I am so grateful for the friends who stood by me. I live in Vancouver and they just decriminalized small quantities of drugs but that doesn't do anything in the long run - there needs to be a safe supply too. I hope we can adopt Portugal's system as well. This video was posted in a recovery discord I'm in and it's great. Very well done.

I'm 7 years clean, my wife is 6 years clean. I've been held hostage, lost my son to the ministry, lost the cars, the house, the money, the business, my wife left to a life on the street where she spent 18 months escaping extreme domestic and gang violence. She ended up pregnant and clawed her way out, she had to escape for two now. we spent 5 years apart healing in recovery. we've been back together for 2 years now and after losing all, today, we closed on a home. I run this podcast full time thanks to a bunch of great organizations in my community. I have a life I never saw coming. its possible. It's an epic adventure. We can recover.

I was a heroin addict for half of my life before I fixed up, I am now 9yrs clean but still live in a "empty cage" I don't have many people wrapped around me as I managed to find the connection with myself, when you can say "I love you" to yourself (not in a vain way) you will never be alone. I am finding out the mechanics and science behind life and I am now on the greatest adventure ever! I send love and health to every addict and every other person in this world, one love x

This guy is on to something, this made me cry because I am an addict and many times in my addiction all I wanted was a connection with someone and to feel loved.

You are the first person I have seen hit the nail on the head! That's one of the things I tell my boys about video games and their phones. Seems our society thinks that that isn't a form of pacifying that situation. Since the person is not actually on drugs, it's somehow okay. Yet it's the same action that needs to be treated.

The best quote I ever read was ‘recovery is making your reality one you don’t want to escape from’, and now I see an addiction craving as a symptom of a deeper problem

I've been addicted to opioids and benzos for 8 years. I started when i was 14. Im now sober for more than a year. You can do this everyone, it's not easy buy YOU CAN be sober and HAPPY.

I wish someone would say they love and come to sit with me. The social stigmas related to addiction make it awful lonely

Swear addiction makes you feel as lonely as you possibly could, yet we are not. Big big love to my fellow fighters, keep ploughing through

People seem to be misunderstanding something so simple. It's not lack of connection that causes addiction but the overdependence on one dopamine source. We need multiple dopamine sources which means connectful relationships, meaningful activities, and clear-defined goals.

I have an addiction. I'm fighting it right now. hardest part is everything.

Treating addicts like human beings works? Who knew. I promised I wouldn't be one of those people, but this is my first highly liked comment and it feels good!

Addiction is a complex, difficult to treat problem because it can be caused by a whole range of different things.

I spent years isolating myself from the world because I was afraid they would find out who I was. It wasn't until I started bonding with the right people that I started seeing why my reliance on alcohol started to lose it's grip on my life. I believe that the biggest problem we face in society is not the drug, alcohol and homeless problem. It is the genuine connection problem. Not internet connection, not WiFi connection, not satellite connection. Real Human Connection.... If nobody comes to mind immediately when you think of real human connection (without material connection) then you may be living in a disconnected world.

*note to self* I need to watch this when I'm sober. thank you past me.

When he said those words “I love you, I don’t want you to be alone”, I felt like everything slowed down for a couple seconds

Yes this is spot on! This explains why some people have a problem with substances that others don’t. This can also explain why addiction runs in families and generations. If they are stuck in the same cage and they’ve only been shown one way to cope then there ya go

I've watched Intervention and while it seems inspiring at first glance, they say at the end of the show that most "victims" who had interventions done to them actually relapsed. Maybe, based on your talk Johann, that's because the mindset of shaming addicts never changed? My ex partner is an addict as well, Oxy for 1 year. The biggest thing I noticed when he was talking to me about addiction was the severe sense of disappointment that he felt everyone around him had towards him. Those feelings could be crippling he said, and can drive you to depression and further addiction. We're unfortunately not together anymore in part because of his lack of emotional coping skills due to drugs, but I still love him as a human and as a friend and don't want him to be socially alone. Maybe love without expectation is the answer.

Hands down best Ted talk I've seen so far. I'm a recovering addict. 10yrs now. If it wasn't for the unconditional love my wife showed me I would probably be dead. I wish America would wake up and see the real problems and stop hiding behind these made up ones.

Didn't expect Chandler to know so much about addiction

Spot on! I lost my son in 2019. It’s not about the addiction, it’s about the isolation and mental health.

brought a tear to my eyes . powerful

Can't even explain how much this video has taught me. Thank you Johann Hari. Just today I finally got to see my brother after 8 years and he's been addicted to some drugs that made him struggle an awful lot in his life. Not sure if it is destiny but i spoke to my family about the exact point made in this video, before I watched it, and decided to take action again, but this time around, I decided to help him with more love, attention, affection and empathy. Fingers crossed this concept will help me to help him and change his life. Again, thank you.

This is spot on. The worse I felt when I was using the more I used. The lonelier I felt or sad I used more. The more society or family came down on me the more I used. Once I finally found someone who loved me regardless of my addiction and was able to put meaning back in my life then I got sober.

So true. Addicts also alienate THEMSELVES due to shame

I used to be a crack and alcohol abuser for decades, and I found an awesome trauma therapist that actually cared about me and my health. I went through a lot of trauma as a kid and that was the reason I was "addicted" to drugs and alcohol. My therapy was what pulled me out of that mess.

Wow. Best TED Talks yet. This must be listened to by every single American and developing country. Bless this man.

I lost my big brother to heroin on Sunday, 6/7/2020. His viewing is today. September 6, 2018 he and I sat on his front porch and he showed me this video. I tried to be there for him but I’m human and weak and I failed. Please do everything you can to be there for those who need help. RIP Mattie 💗

This makes me think of the stigma that addicts may face when presenting to emergency departments and when working with other healthcare providers. This video really hits home that addicts need compassion and support whether it be from their family or from our healthcare system. The principles of beneficence and nonmaleficence come to mind. Beneficence is the idea that healthcare providers should do what is best for their patients, while nonmaleficence is the idea of doing no harm. I remember when I worked in an emergency department and some of the physicians did not volunteer recovery resources to addicts. This was very discouraging. While they weren't doing harm, they also weren't doing good by not being more supportive and for visibly judging the patient. If the opposite of addiction is a connection, I would hope that healthcare providers realize this, and take the time to make that addict feel connected to another person. I understand our US healthcare system is not really set up in a way to support physicians in doing this. I would hope that hospital CEOs and legislatures in the US would see this type of video and realize that the way we treat addicts in our society is not supporting them to get better but instead is further ostracizing them. The American Addiction Centers stated that in 2017 there were almost There was also a distinct 20 million people in the US struggling with addiction use disorders, and of that 34% were illicit substance addictions. It is obvious that this is no small problem, affecting millions of Americans. Addicts are people who deserve just as much compassion and autonomy within our healthcare system as anyone else. Autonomy is the idea that you have the right to decide what happens to your body. Addicts should be provided with all the needed care options to help them with their decision to recover and have the autonomy to make that decision. Justice is another important ethical principle to speak of in terms of addiction. Justice is the idea of giving everyone what they deserve. In healthcare, this means equitable and fair access to healthcare resources. Addicts need to have access to support systems and healthcare resources that will help them thrive in their recovery. I think it is unethical to not create great access to these resources. I think this also means that families and support systems need to support addicts. I really appreciate the speaker's dedication to finding solutions that actually work and hope that these can be implemented into US society. While I did mention some physicians may not have been the most compassionate when treating addicts, I also have seen amazing physicians treat addicts with such compassion and empathy, but they are not in a healthcare system that allows them to provide all the support that an addict truly needs to recover. I was forced to do this for school and it is jibberish im so sorry.

"The opposite of addiction is connection" ❤

I agree completely with the" opposite of addiction is connection". I was in a loveless twenty-year relationship and when I was at my lowest (as an alcoholic), he left. The worst thing that ever happened to me ended up being the best. After a year alone and near death I found the connection I had been looking for those twenty years in my climbing community. My climbing family are the people who saved my life and who continually stick by me. I just celebrated nine years sober and connection is what made all the difference.

The "rat in a cage" analogy is perfect! If you're bored, or have no friends or support, you're going to drink or do other harmful things - even if you hate doing them. 😢 That's where I am right now- in a "cage" with a lot of beer and cigarettes and no friends or support - and there's alot of anger towards me because I'm an alcoholic, and it really sucks!!!! 😠 Just because I'm an alcoholic doesn't make me a bad person, it just makes me act poorly and have bad judgment at times. My family doesn't understand what I'm going through, and won't listen to me either; they just TELL me what I should do, they don't ever ASK me how I'm feeling, or how I got this way.

I listened to this video years ago, and I still regularly direct people here all the time when they are trying to get to the bottom of their addiction problems. It's so good. Thank you for doing this.

been sober for 3 years , still remember listening to this in tears to encorage my self to quit from addiction :)

Back in 2012-13 the teachers wanted to hear our opinion on drug addicts and I responded with "They all just need a big warm hug"

The most beautiful interpretation of addiction ive ever heard. Tears are in my eyes, I’m 57 days clean and sober and i can confirm love is what we need 🤍 sending love to all the addicts still suffering

I feel this TEDTalk on every level. thank you Johann. you have opened people's eyes on addiction.❤️

this is the speech that made me want to be a social worker. so many great points and messages

Crying my eyes out after watching this, if only more people realised or even entertained these ideas. Alot of respect for this speaker and all who worked with him

I'm Portuguese! Some people say that Portugal is not what this man claims to be! But Portugal is more than that! This country is beautiful! Portugal is the 5th safest country in the world and has the most liberal drug laws in the world! Love from Portugal

This brought me to tears. It’s like the first time I’ve heard someone speak that gets me. Wish more people would take the time to try and understand addiction. It’s an act of desperation. So many ppl look at someone with substance abuse issues and assume m it’s something that lives inside you that will always make you more prone to addiction, regardless of other life factors.

Absolutely amazing, enlightening, and true speech, I wish more people thought this way, most definitively worth sharing, I am totally sharing this with my addictions Professor not only to share with my peers, but I feel it's worth sharing with future classes.

Best TED talk in a long time: Important topic Well presented Left with the need to tell eveyone i know about it

Went in: "You know, I know a good bit about addiction. I'll probably know most of this stuff, I'll give it a watch anyways." By the time he mentioned rat heaven, only 5 minutes in: "I know nothing."

Thank you thank you as I sit here and cry , cause that is all I've ever wanted and needed... Just to be loved

I watched this talk multiple times over the years and only now I realized he's got notes on his left hand and they are ridiculously visible. I think the talk is so compelling that I just never noticed that.

Wow, I did this with the people I love dearly. Spent almost a full year with 3 of them. It’s true, it worked.

a big applaud to the ones fighting the battle with themselves and overcoming their addictions.

This was so pristine in the way he spoke, and the level of empathy was so high that I listened to this for a 4th time!

I’ve heard this same discussion and these same arguments dozens of times and I get emotional every time. I wish everyone could understand this.

That's awesome! My best was addicted to meth. The last time I spoke with her she stole my prescription of xanax that the doctors had given me because my little brother had dies. I knew she had taken it. I did. I told her that I did, and she told me, "there is no forgiveness for me, I have stolen from everyone, even my parents". I told her that I forgave her, and that others will with time. Once others see that she was trying to be a better person she would be forgiven. She died a few years later of a heart attack, but she had mended those relationships, and she WAS clean.

Wow. Right as I was about to leave my high-functioning alcoholic best friend and boyfriend because he thinks he can get sober by himself, I watched this video. I was addicted to pills for 10 years and my ex-husband continuously beat me down emotionally and mentally (even after I got sober) until I thought I was worth exactly what he implied I was - nothing. I'm still working things out with with my alcoholic boyfriend, but instead of leaving, I set healthy boundaries for myself, accept him for who he is, and for the first time since he was 15, he WANTS to quit drinking; for himself, for his son, for my girls and me. Please pray he does before it's too late. He's truly a good, honest, deeply-feeling, but hurting and sick man who's just never learned healthy coping skills or had good, trustworthy people in his life. Thank you!

1. Conection is important 2. Love is medicine Thanks Johann Hari !

You made me cry. You're not alone. We love you.

watching this while high, as painfully ironic as that is. really feel like i know what he was talking about

I have been sober from IV heroin and meth for 15 months. I watched this a few months into my soberity and it really has helped me build a life worth keeping and adjusting my behavior when I start isolating. ❤

Thank you so much for this talk. I'm in a relationship with someone who is using and want to support them. This helped me see how best to support them and connect with them. I was distancing myself instead. I want to remain safe, and at the same time, I don't want to abandon them as I learned that he had abandonment issues.. I just didn't see his addiction through this lense. This was very informative and helpful. I couldn't imagine that he was feeling this isolated and alone.

This broke my heart because it's so true. I just wish that our loved ones would understand this about us.

IF I CHANGE THE WAY I LOOK AT THINGS, THE THINGS I LOOK AT CHANGE. KEEP MOVING FORWARD MY FELLOW RECOVERING ADDICTS!!!!!

"The opposite of addiction is connection" - beautiful!

Well done. The take-aways here are many and I'll reflect on this for days and then return.

I wish this could be instilled in every individual's mind. The way this would make the world a better place not only for addicts but literally for everyone is moving!