Can we also talk about how some of them get so obsessed with us that they copy us to the T??? and I mean the mannerism, the EXACT outfits a couple of days after they see you, they act like you in front of your common friends, copy literally YOUR CAR. Ugh, I have a story... I had to block her, I would post a picture a certain way, two to five days later she would wear almost the exact same thing. She went out of her way to buy MY SAME CAR! Used my same 4 emojis in THE SAME ORDER (the crown has been a big thing for me since I was a teen because of my name), she literally did her birthday party CROWN THEMED and made every body around us believe she loved crowns. I would post a song I love, she would then make a video singing that song saying its her favorite. Made her bedroom look similar to mine, GOSH we're ADULTS! SO ANNOYING. One day, I remember I wore a long black bodycon dress with leggings, boots, and a beautiful vest on top of the dress to church. After service when I came home, and one of our mutual friends called me to tell me that (the copycat) was sad, and that she came up with an idea to model and do a photoshoot to make her feel better, but she wanted to do it with me. Apparently she was comparing to me, and how she didn't feel good about the way she looked, and something about her confidence. So I was like okay, we can do that photoshoot, I'm down (we never did it, but I found so strange that our common friend felt like calling me to tell me this) Literally next week she was wearing THE SAME OUTFIT I WORE THE PREVIEWS SUNDAY with different colors. after many months of me being annoyed, I blocked her and stopped going to the church I used to go to. I felt like slowly she stole my identity, my different outfits, my personality, I felt like she made everyone believe she was that way (the way I am). I even started looking online because I felt like she went to the extreme with it, and then I found out online that it's a mental personality disorder that it's called "narcissistic mirroring", that creeped me out! After that, I made sure no one in that church knows about me anymore 🤣 and our common friend keeps messaging to me, to shape her curls, or to go out and I keep giving excuses... cause I feel like if she has access to me EVERYONE THERE WILL HAVE ACCESS TO ME. On the other hand, my tenants (who have been my friends for many years and who moved to the first floor) LITERALLY COPIED MY ENTIRE HOUSE DECOR TO THE T. She always loved dark decor, but after she came to my house a couple of times after she moved in, she started changing everything on the first floor to white, and not just any white BUT RUSTIC WHITE like I have in every corner😩. Adding the plants like I have, same couch arrangements, wall decor... she then showed me how she changed everything, and then said "I'm only missing the white fireplace tv station that you have" 😭😭😭😭 I wanted to die. My husband just tells me I should feel proud, but I DONT. Why does it annoy me so much? I don't know, but I hate it 😭 I like being different and having things my way 😫 I hate it, I feel like I'm a magnet to people, and sometimes that's more negative than positive cause I've also had men(friends) having a weird obsession DESPITE the fact that I'm literally married and the OPPOSITE SEX. It's SO WEIRD!

Most people get ALOT OF PLEASURE when a pretty or beautiful woman is going through some type of tragedy.

Girl… being beautiful we are FOLLOWED like the paparazzi follow celebrities! Someone’s ALWAYS watching us.

For so long I beat myself up trying to figure out why random women who I had never met gave me dirty looks or treated me rudely when I had never even said one word to them. As I got older I realized it was their jealousy. Now I don’t get upset by it. You’re so right, they just can’t help wearing their jealousy all over their face.

A coworker always asking the guys what they think about me, obsessed 😂😂😂

People will literally sit and have round table discussions and conversations about the pretty girl’s life. I’ve experienced this, and I actually thought something was wrong with me. I never connected it to the way I looked

Some people do small things they feel you won’t notice like abruptly cutting in front of you, nudging while moving past you, speaking to you in a rude tone, blatantly ignoring you when you ask a question or speak to someone (especially when you rádiate class and elegance). I always make sure to let them know it’ll come back ten fold should they try me 💅🏾

No literally. The compliments are nice, but the hate is real & they dont even know me 🤧😮‍💨

Being just pretty is one thing....have a sexy body with wide hips and butt with small waist and its very much so tough

“I don’t have time to deal with mental illnesses 24/7 “ 👏👏👏

Hey ladies!! Been dealing with this my entire life. It is exhausting lol But one day I flat out told them what their problems was...I said "I know what the real problems is, your just upset because Im pretty" with a straight face. The following week all of my car windows were busted out. Be safe out here with your pretty selves ❤

And God forbid you are slim/lean and pretty and have long hair AND are dark skinned

I have had people take pictures of me.. I am so happy that you made this channel. Thank you. Im 44 and just beginning to model. Can you believe it? No one knows my age. I've spent my entire life trying to look as unambiguously black as possible and officially.. Im over it. Blond hair and everything.. and Im experiencing the benefits of the privilege. I feel so much free-er!

I want to make a suggestion..A really good movie for MLS women to watch is Malena. It's an Italian movie about a beautiful woman who faces bullying from the entire town for several years just for being beautiful. At the end of the film, the women left her alone when they noticed she had aged and put on weight. That movie includes most of the humbling tactics discussed on this channel.

I’ve had someone use my instagram pictures as a catfish before. They got sloppy and accidentally liked one so I found out lol.

I compliment other women all the time , and I determine my own value .

I've had so many girls tell me "I thought you were pretty but didn't say anything because I thought you were mean or stuck up" 😂. Like what?? I've had a fake twitter and Instagram page made of me, I've been followed home and in public, etc and I have felt lonely my whole life and no one really gets it. I had a old friend who only wanted to be friends because of me being pretty to her and she only wanted "pretty friends" but her personality was garbage. Like you said "my beauty is not in competition with another woman" and that's how I always felt. There are plenty of pretty girls so I hate the hate that happens with being pretty.

I relate to a lot of what you said. I have had women try to say I was sleeping with a lot of men just because I went on a lot of dates but the truth is that men just want beautiful women around. I would get invited to parties, yachts, VIP sections etc for being pretty and thin and I was not sleeping with those men. Simply being around beautiful women raises men's status. And yes I was told by black people that I was too skinny but I definitely feel I get the most privilege, take the best pictures, and can wear anything I want when I stay a size zero. The guys who like "thick" women usually don't have the lifestyle I want anyway.

Facts! And so are skinny women! And for men, it's the ones whose bodies are lean or muscular. It is what it is. Unfortunately, we live in a 3D paradigm - and people go off of what they see FIRST and then everything else comes second. I don't hate. I simply use THAT as inspiration to better myself physically.

“Haven’t decided if you’re cute yet” 🙄 how did you even respond to that absurdity? I can’t think of a good clap back 🤭

@12:40 - That’s why I’m thankful to now have a job where I work from home. It is peaceful. ☺️ You are so right about what happens in the workplace. I had to quit a job last year, then was blessed with my current job.

Finally a channel that doesn’t make me think I’m delusional… it’s scary how I can relate to most things.. and I’m glad I’m not alone🙏

I experienced this often when I used instagram more frequently. I would get a negligible amount of likes and comments compared to less attractive women. But I was able to see that several people would have saved and sent my posts 🙄

People tell me i look like a celebrity alot. Or they dont believe me when i tell them i have a 25 and 22 year old.

5:57 that Alicia Keyz example made me think of how people ridiculed Mariah Carey at her low moments as well. Her being that gorgeous AND talented is too much for *insecure people to handle… just finished her memoir & it is sooo good! Highly recommend

Agreed! I rarely post on social media. Because sometimes I feel like people want to be in my business. Sometimes I wear a mask to avoid getting hit on. But the up side is sometimes I get free stuff like food and drinks.

I get stares all day from other women. It’s the craziest thing!

We do cause chaos. Every male ive associated with on an aquaintance level for business has destroyed friendships with their business partners. They flirt, compete and turn on each other.

I naturally attract a lot of attention when I’m out, even if I’m dressed down. How can I feel more confident & safe to go out by myself? Tips please

What I appreciate is that you own that you prefer being skinny ❤

I find it a group psychosis honestly. Most of the positive benefits only exist when you are young - so enjoy it while you can. *So* many people have that mentality you described of being "the one" to put us in our place that as you age it just becomes A LOT of cruelty and violence you face simply for not being ugly. I have even gained some weight and stopped doing makeup and still receive the negativity. It is beyond draining bc I am a veteran diagnosed with ptsd and these ppl are so obsesssd with the external meanwhile i got a lot going on really wish they woukd just be silent most days it takes everything in me to not go postal. But yes it was hella fun from 19-23. I receive no positive benefits from men anymore so the jealousy from women just makes it so hard and isolating. I want normal friends like everyone else. I want to be able to go outside without being followed or commented on. But it never ends. It's been like this for years.

Can you do a video on pretty girls being lonely ?

Girl. Yes, I have felt like a celebrity many times. And to add to it I'm naturally slender. And I have self confidence. When you have that too...yup.

One woman almost got hit by a car staring at me so hard today and she was snarling. I was like look lady, uour daughters are waiting for you to cross the street.

Yep being dark skin with curly long hair my whole life ppl really whisper if my hair is my own or a curly perm Smh. Like I’ve literally worked in McDonald’s at one points and my coworkers and managers were whispering amongst themselves to see if my hair was mine because I flat ironed it. One bold person came and asked and I said Yeah. Showed my scalp and all And in high school girls wanted to fight me for no real reason( was a cheerleader but in the middle ground not popular but not lame. Nice as hell to everyone) all because they wanted to pull my hair. But my friends and teammates dead that cause I bothered nobody. And my mother’s in laws all ask me is my curls and hair fr fr mine…been natural 10 yrs. And always had long hair before I went back to my curls. My family knows im in a relationship they stay asking bout it. He’s handsome and I’m pretty but I keep us private. Not ready to introduce him full throttle yet. But they throwing opinions when they know nothing. They just see him when we are out and they call me on FaceTime And my family always say I’m lucky to have curly hair or ask bout my weight( I’m a size 5-8 with a nice butt ) My sisters literally say I can’t talk bout black hair politics cause of my texture being looser . And one would buy wigs whenever I’d come into town to mimic my hair ( she’s light skin green eyes and pretty but my hair triggered something idk) I get dirty looks often in public . Like I’m on high alert when I ride the bus . Like I seen one girl look at me dirty as if I wanted. Her man 😂 he’s so not my type. When I start jobs I purposely do not come in full glam ( I’m an mua and content creator with niches in beauty and lifestyle/hoping to go full time with it all ) because that when I get treated really mean. Hoping by summer I. Do not gotta work a regular job. Currently I’m a hostess and love being one because I just be pretty I’ve had all my exes try humble me. I love my currently because he adores me and call me beautiful gorgeous and his Barbie doll. He doesn’t sexualize or withhold compliments.

I had a rhino and have hair extensions, love being skinny like you that’s my beauty standard. Do you pretty is a thing ❤

Yes!! 👏🏼the fact that they discuss you, even in a negative manner, whereas you don’t think of them at all 🙌🏼😂

I feel like this is a reason nara smith gets hated on

People are obessive over me as well i just be like maybe its just me but nah this shit gets deep

Where have this channel been all my life lol.

Being a pretty woman is like walking around with a target on your back, you attract narcissistic, superficial men and spiteful jealous women. Im happy just being basic now, i've done the pretty girl thing and it didn't bring me happiness, I don't like attention and i'm an introvert.

I know that I am changing because these type of videos no longer trigger me 🩷 I was super skinny my whole life and I loved it , I got with a man got pregnant and got skinnier once I had our baby , he cheated with a thick woman , and it seemed like around this time 2020 being thick was in . I forced my body to gain a bunch of weight and I got super thick , my butt was huge and I did t like the attention I got from men , it was all sexual vs when I was skinny , I asked myself do you like this?? Or did you do it for something else? So I began losing a bunch of weight for my 25th birthday which is next week and I feel so light and sexy 🙌🏾this video is everything

This is spot on! When you are invisible you can just live life in peace. I gained 20 lbs and although I still get shade from jealous/insecure folks, it has definitely calmed down a lot. Right now I am a bit apprehensive about leaning out again because I'm low key traumatized from the negative attention I received from being a physically fit attractive woman. It was very odd having people (even strangers) obsess over me. I could not share with anyone how I felt because they thought i was self absorbed. I suffered in silence and became a recluse some days just to not be objectified. Thank you for sharing this topic!

I feel like men in California REALLY CAN TELL if/when you've had work done. They are pretty judgy about it too. Very interesting video and thought provoking as always. Very educational :-)

I'm loving these long videos! I can definitely relate a lot to some people trying to nickpick anything about me or just trying to humble me out of nowhere. For instance, I cut off a guy that was interested in dating me a while ago because: Anytime I would say something positive about myself, he would try to demean it in some sort of way. When I mentioned being harassed once by a coworker due to my looks, he started saying that I am not all that and that I am just cute even though he said I was gorgeous beforehand. In the summer (I biked in the sun to commute), he told me I could pass as mixed, but said I was getting dark in a negative tone like it's a bad thing. He pointed out when I had acne and said that he wishes he could just pop it. Randomly brought up that my nose is bigger than his (it's not btw). Randomly told me that his celebrity crush is Margot Robbie. Also told me he would want to get with my cousin and told me a random woman on the street had an attractive body....

Friending other beautiful women is a good thing/a win, if they’re loyal/authentic.

I can't directly relate to having this level of pretty privilege. However, one of my friends in university, who was the traditional looking black and white mix, was considered to be the pretty girl, and I just remember all the hate she received from darker skinned black women. They would scrutinise her to another level! I felt so bad for my friend but luckily she was confident enough not to let it get to her!

I receive a lot of compliments from strangers and distant relatives but None from my parents, "friends" or siblings . In fact my mom called me "fat" [ I am not ] 😢

I’ve had friends tell me that other "friends" wondered about whether I puke after I eat or what else I might be doing to get the body I have 😂

I tell you what. I love this channel. My daughter here is making me want to do the same for mature women of MLS who need to hear this that maintaining PP continues no matter our age. Girl you are a breath of fresh air and so eloquently spoken content. You deserve a million subs ❤❤❤❤

To be honest, people aren't afraid of weight loss surgery, some people can't afford it nor the insurance they have doesn't cover it. They do the same to Lizzo

I get giddy when I see these timestamps!

Someone hacked into my old instagram account one time that shits scary i had to make a new one

No lies told here🙌🙌👏👏👏

Interesting discussion. I have experienced this my whole life. I have just found your channel. Keep up the good work.

The honesty of this channel is refreshing

This is my first video I see in your channel 😊 and your are like the big sister that I never have ❤ thanks for your work 🙏🏻❤️

This is such an indeph explanation of this topic❤❤❤❤. Great vid! Ive had a random girl asking her man what he thinks about my body ( back in 2016). They were in earshot.I was really slim and he told her that i had a petite body. Then the girfriend said "thats what i want to look like. " So i found it strange that she would ask her man that. And yes women can be inspiration to others by what they look like. Yes they will ask others about what they think of you.

You’re 100% right this happens with men in different ways as well.

Another great upload keep up with the great work so spot on!! what I go through every day ❤

I appreciate your videos so very much. Thank you for posting this type of content especially for it being intended for those who can relate to it. From the depths of my heart I think what you are doing is extremely valuable. It is such important information for women who struggle with these dynamics in life. I have a daughter who harbors just as much and so much more of the beauty that I have and have carried throughout my life especially in my younger years of my teens and 20s when females who fit the beauty standard are most thirsted for on a mass scale. I try to often pass on all of the life lessons that I have learned and struggled with to my daughter because I know the hardships and the actual heart ache that she is going to feel by being extremely hated, criticized, obsessed over, copied, competed with, the levels of jealousy she will experience, just all of it. It’s a heavy burden in so many ways which I think really overshadows a lot of the pretty privilege. There’s so much heartache. There’s so much loneliness. So Often you don’t know who really loves you when it feels like everyone is just trying to get some thing from you whether it be your sex, proximity, your secrets, what have you. People go to dangerous lengths to have your life or get a part of it. The friendships that you lose or discover were never real. I mean I can just go on and on. I try to really let my daughter know ways that she can handle it and cope mentally and emotionally because there’s going to be no escaping it for her. Just like there was no escaping it for me. I tried to hide throughout all my 20s. I wore raggedy old clothes I wore old man clothes all in an attempt to hide myself from the onslaught of attention and harassment that came with being a young female who fit the main stream beauty standard of the time. And even then people would still see through those efforts and it was exhausting. I am older now and I am a mother, my body has changed, I am more fluffy and I don’t garner the same hysteria that I used to when being out in public. Which honestly is such a relief in many ways. I still get all of it in smaller doses especially when I dress up, but nothing like when I was younger. But I’m scared for my daughter. I am legitimately scared for her. So again all of this to say that I truly thank you for putting out this information. I will be having my daughter watch your videos. Because it’s important. It really is. I especially appreciate the way you break down what’s going on from a psychological perspective. The way the psychology and subconscious social behaviors play into it all really tops the cake of all this. Bravo! And it can truly help and save young women’s lives to know how to cope with it. If I had known how to cope with it in healthy ways and utilize it to my benefit rather than trying to hide from it my life would be so different. Because I was in a constant state of flight of running from all of the attention and energy that was thrown my way I feel like I self sabotaged a lot of the opportunities that I had in my hands. Videos like yours can help other women Navigate through the pretty girl life dynamics. ✨💗👗👠

Guess I’m not as pretty as I thought

💯💯💯💯💯 well put together hun.

Thank you for this !! I thought I was going crazy smh

Im white and always thought black women were the most beautiful women in the world.. I have to wear a ton of makeup to even get close to good looking.😔

Yasss love the model look you have 😍 as a petite

Great video

OHHH MY GOSH 8:00-8:15 I felt that so hard in my soul !!!!

Period! ❤️

This was great

True facts yeppp 🔥🔥🔥

This helps when it comes to being real with ourselves and our self image

Great video ❤

Facts!!!!!❤❤❤🎉🎉

I’m conceited period 😊

We Are!

so exhausting. this was the video that lead me to this channel. just UGH.

Beautiful ladies🤩

GOSPEL TRUTH and the story of my life. #IONLYCompeteWithTheWomanIWasYesterday

Mother ate from 00:00 to 42;09 straight 💯🙌❤️

My sister and I walked into a party the other day and every girl in the room gave us dirty looks it was so weird 😅 I just smiled 🧐 we trying to have fun too 😂

You have look at your chart too to see whats actually there

I just want to take a minute to thank you so much for acknowledging that augmentations through surgery or just a valid as someone being "natural". At the end of the day it's like" b**** nobody cares", beauty is beauty.

This. Honestly I believe like I did not receive job opportunities because the woman was envious of me. She posted about buying a home with someone else, knowing we talked about it. She was my friend, but after that I'm like there's no other reason why she would not use me. People will be TRIFILING.

My personal beauty standard is to have nice clear skin, smell nice. I want to be slim thick with a good amount of muscle. Kinda muscle mommy. Straight hair. Also... Losing fat and gaining muscle is hard! If lipo wasn't so expensive I'd have done it years ago

🌹🌹

I don’t feel like I fit the type of beauty your channel is targeted towards. I’m talking about as far as racially ambiguous woman. I don’t look mixed but I do have brown skin, that people always compliment me on. smaller features like my nose/ skinny etc. but I def can relate to a lot of the things spoken about in this video and other videos on your channel. So many people always and still inquire about many areas of my life. Many people’s favorite question is do I have a bf. 😵‍💫 Like why is that any of your business? Even my former church used to call me celebrity. 😵‍💫 in which I never did anything for attention, I literally used to just show up for service. It’s really crazy the comments and the treatment pretty woman go through when all we ever do is MIND OUR BUSINESS. 😩 it’s really crazy how much ppl obsess with our lives and we’re not thinking of those people but our own problems/life.

People always tell me I don’t look like my family and I’m black just like them but I could pass for Dominican or Puerto Rican . My father is from Jamaica and my dad’s mother looks more West Indian . My cousins father’s are African American. They would always make fun of my dad being Jamaican and would try to use a fake Jamaican accent to be funny but they were just jealous and all the guys always liked me and not them. They would even try to fight me because of it and I knew that was why. When I was a teenager they would steal my clothes and wear it to school so that I would approach them about it so they could fight me in front of the guys who likes me 😂 I stay far away from them til this day. Whenever I do run into them I can still see the jealous look on their faces it’s spooky and weird because I’ve always been nice and soft spoken and they are loud ghetto and masculine

Are you on social media? Can we follow you?

And cosmetic surgery is the same as natural beauty.