Can't believe I gotta say this. The first one is a facepalm because that's a PS4 controller.

Please don’t have an emergency at this location Person having a heart attack: ight imma head out

0:11, I read that article and the actual reason was that the knives (automatic folding knives) had a faulty safety which led to the knives opening in peoples pockets and cutting them

Fun fact: there's real people that get mad for you having the same name as them

“I’m disappointed in DC for allowing such a movie to be made” This sentence captures my fear of censorship of all things violent or not safe for children because the people who are stupid and think that everything must be kid friendly become the majority This is a legitimate fear of mine

Leg guy: *screams about his legs* Other guy: I was making a camo joke Me: that’s probably why he didn’t see it

The story about the “don’t stand on the toilet” sign is for international travelers. In some countries, such as Nepal, they do not sit down to use the restroom, but instead stand over a giant hole. Many foreigners have tried legal action against the establishments they went to the restroom at because they suffered injuries after falling off the toilets, thus the need for the signs.

I once had a shampoo that proudly announced that it was gluten free.

Hey, I fully support flat eathers trying to scientifically prove their theorys. I only have a problem with it when they falsify evidence or ignore their findings

I just imagine Oz sitting down on his computer chair and mini Oz on his lap trying to peek at the screen.

"I don't know of any apps that can open the closet for you" You've clearly never used discord

8:33 Why do people keep doing this? There's literally a rating on it that means "not for kids" smh. Superheroes can be for adults, too.

10:00 I want this to be in a horror film, at the moment where all hell breaks loose, and the protagonist is legging it down the road, sees an emergency phone, pelts over at top speed, and then there's this, just waiting for them.

5:12 if kkk members fight each other, does it make it a klash of klans?

12:50 It’s a cat muzzle. You’ve probably never trimmed the claws of a cat who hates claw trimming. The muzzle prevents the cat from biting you, and is really only something you put on your cat when you do something necessary that the cat also hates. Like trimming its anger needles.

2:06 actually we have wifi in our barn. It’s good wifi too

9:50 i can just imagine a guy about to get shot by a mugger. he holds up his hand and says "wait hold on. we gotta move somewhere else." the mugger is confused as the victim motions him about twenty feet away from the location. the victim turns to the mugger and says "okay, you can shoot me now."

What’s with parents and thinking every movie needs to be safe for their broken condoms

“It’s believed this is due to a high school soccer game” Just go through the yellow pages for women named “karen” in her area

3:28 I feel like some people may not have noticed because it took me a while also so ima point this out... the blue signs are pointing to the left, so no matter the monstrosity of the painting, you know to go left right? but directly ahead... is a “no turning left” sign. it’s also a one way road. it’s also double yellows there is literally no solution to this in which you don’t break at least one law

4:03 Same vibe as that one Ruby, Sapphire, and Emerald textbox. “What town are you from?” • Yes • No

*Sees the headline “iPhone turned me gay.”* 😂😂😂😂 *Sees the word Russian* Ohhhhhhh. Now I get it.

(8:15) _"> [spend money] on tickets and snacks"_ I get the waste of money on tickets, but you can bring the snacks with you. You didn't waste the money on snacks.

4:43 Have lived in China for a year and a half and been on a number of flights on Chinese Airlines, both domestic and international, and rather than make a generalization, let me give you an anecdote that was repeated on pretty every flight (except #4). 1. Safety rule was mentioned (no phones during take-off landing, airplane mode during flight, open windows when landing, no standing during take-off or landing etc.) 2. Rule was immediately broken by 1/3 of Chinese people on flight. 3. Chinese staff ignore Chinese people breaking rules. Even things like having very loud PTT conversations during takeoff. 4. Optional- Non-Chinese person (me) does something small like keeps earphones plugged into SanDisk Sport MP3 player, gets yelled by flight attendant while someone (Chinese) is WeChatting it up right behind her. I just expect it and make a game of how many people believe the rules don't apply to them on any given flight, and it's always high, and the flight attendants don't do a damned thing about it. When I first saw the headline about someone opening the door, I thought "How stupid can someone be" but now that I know it was in China, it just... fits. People so consistently disregard safety rules on these flights that this no longer surprises me.

Darwin was wrong; we aren't getting smarter as time goes on. Instead, we're just finding new ways to be stupid.

This channel's so cursed that when I saw beware the speed bumps I automatically assumed that it was referring to children in a school zone. Thanks Oz

"You don't kill a cow to make cheese." There is a situation out there where this fits perfectly as old-timey wisdom and I'm remembering it for when it comes up.

"man sues apple claiming iphone turned him gay" Why... Why do I expect this?

“there’s a story behind this and i must know” oz... people stood on the toilet.. that’s the story....

About the "rare chicken", I've cut into chicken that wasn't done yet, so I just kept cutting it up so it'd cook faster when I put it back in the oven. If I would have thought about it, I would have taken a picture joking about rare chicken, before putting it back in. My point being, it might be a joke, and I hope it is.

0:37 most cows are killed after they stop being able to produce milk I am hoping that is what they meant Edit from 7 months later- id like to clarify that despite this I personally still eat meat and don’t shame anyone else who does I have learned a few new things about it that are interesting so read the replies if you want more facts on cows and the dairy and meat industry

"Wheres the Emergency Phon- Ah damn, guess I just gotta die then."

I feel like the last woman was either like "these goshdarng milenials are ruinning OUR country with their electronic cars wasting OUR electricity" or she just enjoys random arson as she walks

The cat mask Is fir when you like take your fat to the vet in a cat carrier, and you put that on their face so they dont realise they're in the car and they dont get frightened as much

I find this channel very therapeutic. It is refreshing to me to learn of others who experience the same problems but have a healthy response to it. Thank you.

4:50 no... that was amazing sticker placement 👌... that store employee knew exactly what he/she was doing and I admire that!!! +10 respect

2:23 I watched the documentary "behind the curve" where this is shown. Someone bought a light-gyroscope for 20k, because it's incredibly accurate. The idea is, if the earth spins 360 degrees in 24 hours, then the gyroscope should fall off-center by 15 degrees per hour. But if the earth is flat and doesn't spin, then it'll stay upright. Guess what: it fell off center by exactly 15 degrees per hour. Then they all said that it must be because _the sky_ spins, and it's heavenly energies causing it to go off center. So then they encased it in lead (or something) to block off the heavenly energies. Guess what: It still went off center. Then they said that they'll try BISMUTH and see if that 'works'. What are they going to do? Refuse to believe the results of their own experiment until they've tried every single element of the periodic table? No. They're going to deny the results of their own experiment until they try _every possible material imaginable_, including ones that are impossible to create and whose existence doesn't even make sense from a physics point of view. _Especially_ the ones that are impossible to create or make any sense out of whatsoever,

When soccer team lose: MUST KEY CAR. MUST KEY A DAMN CAR.

That daylight savings one is just too perfect...someone has written the date, and when the article is turned so we can read it, the '18' turns into an emoji that conveys that even the year is just done with the stupidity XD

*I’M NOT PRONOUNCING “ARKANSAS” ARKANSAW UNTIL ITS SPELLED ARKANSAW*

9:01 I'm a Cancer and even I got the statement on the fly.

"BDSM Cat mask" --OzMedia 2019

I remember one time when I was younger and the movie Ted was coming out I convince my mother to take me to it because she thought it was a kid show I don't remember how old I was... all I remember is I was young enough to where my mother tried to cover my eyes

Fun fact: I saw that myth busters episode and they didn't explore the situation enough to get a definitive outcome. My highschool science teacher was really into pointing that out and took us to the school pool and used canoes to prove it actually could be possible depending on depth (water pressure) and boat make.

3:54 I get where you’re coming from, Oz, but *all* cleansing products are concoctions of chemicals.

Last one just reminded me of when this random person keyed my moms truck for no reason on Mothers Day. We were enjoying a nice dinner to come out and see some ass keyed it.

10:50 "Employers can no longer essentially steal billions from their employees" FTFY

2:12 turns out, the Amish do have internet access. It's among the few modern luxuries they'll use

2:37 I don't see anything wrong, she's just activating the ejection seat.

Bruh I actually searched up 'boat scene of the Carribean' because I was confused on what the joke was and why it was a facepalm. Took me a solid minute of staring at the results to realise. It's basically an entire series of movies about a damn boat. It's not helpful at all.

"Now water with H2O" made me laugh so hard I almost blew the peanut butter cup I was eating out my nose....my sinuses are screwed for a while...lol!

Karen: *hold the handle on the back* Also Karen: *oh yeah it’s big b-* Everyone else at the hospital: *fractured brain time*

I facepalmed myself I thought You were emkay for one Minute Even Hearing Your voice, i still thought You were emkay Reddit Here i come

OZ, "why are these people instead on eating rare chicken." We need to just let these people go.

This subreddit makes me feel so much better about my stupid self

10:06 "Hey uh, heart? Yeah I know you were in the middle of like, stopping beating? But could you like hold off on that for like, 30 seconds so I can get to an emergency phone? Cool, thanks buddy"

Laughing cow cheese bet you werent laughing when you saw the price. Thats what they should have said

4:00 I only recently realized that my 3 in 1 body wash has caffeine. So that’s why I never need coffee...

0:01 the people building the titan submersible needed this.

The cover on the cat that Oz was laughing at is actually a cat muzzle. Unlike dog muzzles, cat muzzles have to cover their eyes because cats are more relaxed if they can’t see, unlike dogs. Which is why they look a bit strange lol.

6:47 probably me when I was eight, I stood on a toilet seat and looked in the mirror at a starbucks while yeeting a Gatorade cap and it somehow unlocked the door as I was standing on a toilet seat so then a guy walks in and sees a depressed eight year old girl with tangled hair standing on the toilet seat looking into the mirror and he instantly closes the door and I have never came back to that place.

12:54 BE CAREFUL YOU DO REMEMBER THAT YOU MADE MINI-OZ PART CAT

"Recalled for posing laceration hazard" Well yeah I sure hope it does

No one: Oz: *c h O O O O O s e*

Its 1 year since the peepeepoopoo joke man had his doctor's appointment. I hope he's doing ok... 1:15

I was watching the daylight savings thing why’ll eating noodles, I thought nothing of it, then they said ‘Queensland’ and I litterily spat out my noodles when I realised they where talking about Australia (my home country)

4:20 *MMMMMMMMMMMM SALMONELLA MY FAVOURITE*

someone: *does something stupid* oz: *iida hands*

9:06 I’m Australian and this scene just hurts

i like how, when you open the description, the first sentence is pull the lever kronk

12:56 That's actually a muzzle. Ever put a cover over a cat carrier when you take your cat to the vet to calm it down? That's what this does. It's a very good restraint for temperamental cats.

The fact you were playing C&C at the end of this video, is enough to make me love you.

**Reads description** "WRONG LEVER!!!!"

8:47 When astrology believers think everything is about them True facepalm 🤦‍♂️

12:12 they were drinking pollution and shits 😂 but it’s actually sad cause a lot of people don’t have clean drinking water 24/7 😔

I really like that he added a follow-up to the keying.

10:20 No... no it can’t be... People can’t be that stupid **search up “is the moon” on google** I lost hope for humanity...

Hey Oz Media, just wanted to say instead of browsing Reddit when I'm bored, I watch your videos because they have the best of the best when it comes to that topic, and it's always entertaining and gets my mind back on the humorous side. Thanks a lot man

honestly, i LOVE when people realize they're wrong and start apologizing like me to my parents

One day Tesla’s will have the perimeter defense system from subnautica.

3:47 WHAT!? SPEAK LOUDER, I CAN'T HEAR OVER THE SOUND OF SHOWER WASHING DOWN MY 5 IN 1 BODY WASH!

On the Man sueing Apple one, I found funny that he was confused about what was going on... Until he found out the man was Russian. I found that funny.

the entirety of that daylight savings bit is just 'they a little confused but they got the spirit'

12:45 cat gimp. 🤣

2:41 she the clone trooper everbody else is a jedi she get the order 66

5:10 Oz: "I see this as an absolute win."

Thank you your content helps me get through my hard time a lot.

My band actually played frolic at a concert

4:28 Once when we were watching football, we had loads of food out. Me and my friend decided to get some chicken goujons. When he took a bite he spat it out and knew it was raw. I took a bite and ate it. I was so lucky I didn’t get salmonella. Sometimes, eating raw chicken won’t give you salmonella, but we can’t tell the difference so we always handle them if they do. Go careful around chicken guys lol

*Sees no R/* Wait, thats Illegal

9:49 there's one of those emergency phones that's out of service on my campus, too. Bonus, it's the one closest to the only open dining hall and most of the dorms

Ok I live in queensland Australia and we r in a drought and It has just piss down rain last night and we could get more

That woman seems to be butthurt over her son or daughter losing the soccer game this is why soccer moms have that title lmao

Last time i came so early i left someone pregnant

8:22 dont complain about paying for snacks, you can still enjoy them even if you leave

Please don't have an emergency in this location *We did it boys, emergency is no more*

12:30 Fun fact: The camera is actually 480p.

Um... When parents take their kids to mature movies do they straight up don't know what R-rate means? Do they don't see the trailers?? Parents. Animated movie or superheroes doesn't automatically mean "for children"

4:15 as someone who cooks for a living I can confirm that that chicken is in fact med-rare, lol

3:22 I’m guessing turn left, because the letters in LEFT are brighter and less worn than the ones in RIGHT, so the left sign was painted more recently. But that’s just a guess, and that’s still a humongous duck-up.