We’re at the visitor’s centre of Blarney castle in Blarney of course, and we’re going to kiss the infamous Blarney stone, which is located in romantic Blarney Castle. Now I must tell you as a prospective visitor, that Blarney Castle offers more than a stone to kiss, more even than a castle, in fact it lies in some incredible parkland, which you can see here. Of course, its important to point out that it’s a ruin and not someone’s actual home, but as you’ll see it’s an impressive ruin.
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As we enter we have the obligatory gift shop, with a very bored looking and surprised saleswoman - she should enjoy the off season tranquillity - she’ll running around like a 'blue arsed fly' when summer comes. Inside we look at magnificent carved stone door openings. However, there is a multimedia screen directly on entry. I always think this kind of thing detracts from the authenticity of these ancient buildings. I know its very popular these days and it’s impossible to find anything anymore that you just look at and admire, but actually that’s what I prefer to do. A plasma screen has about as much in common with this great castle as the man on the moon. If you feel strongly pro-plasma you can moan at me in the comments.
The castle dates from 1446 although, even prior to that there was another fortification here as early as 1200. It was built by the MacCarthy clan who were a cadet branch of the Kings of Desmond.
I'm not keen on the signage used throughout the castle, this place should be considered an important piece of heritage, not Disneyland! I don’t mean we all need to be walking around with our serious heads on. I mean the Blarney stone is a bit of fun - of course I realise that - but let’s maintain some dignity here too.
It's a long climb to the top. Not only are the stairs steep and narrow, but they’re, as you can imagine after many centuries, more than a little bit wonky and not so easy to climb, particularly with camera in hand. But, there are lovely views out through the arrowloops and windows all the way up. I think if you have any kind of mobility problems, or if wonky stair climbing doesn’t come easy due to age or ill health - stay at the bottom and let your friends or family tell you about it when they come down. I think if anything happened it wouldn’t be easy to get a team of paramedics with a stretcher up into the castle stairs!
Anyway I finally made it to what I thought was the top…only to discover that it was the kitchen. What a weird place for a kitchen! But seriously, this castle is really impressive….as are its grounds. The views at the top are amazing across the Cork countryside.
So aside from this extraordinary view, why do we come up to the top of a castle in the middle of the Irish countryside to kiss a piece of rock? Well legend has it that is you kiss the stone you’ll be endowed with the gift of eloquence or skill at flattery. So the gift of eloquence (or the blarney as we Irish call it) is a good attribute to have I think you’ll agree. You might wanna go up and kiss the stone just before a job interview or before you meet your in-laws for the first time.
We witness in the film a lady actually kissing the stone and can see what's involved. Just think of the craic you’ll be next time you’re in the pub with your mates with your newly acquired eloquence….your gift of the gab…your aule blarney. And if for some reason the spell doesn’t quite take hold, and you notice no strengthening of your verbal dexterity afterwards, the view from the top of the castle is compensation enough.
One source of the legend of the stone is that Cormac MacCarthy, Lord of Blarney travelled to see Queen Elizabeth I who was about to confiscate his lands. His task was to talk her out of it, but the problem was that he wasn’t a very effective speaker, and therefore not likely to succeed. But he met an old woman who told him to kiss the stone, which he did and low and behold, but didn’t he go on to charm is way back into the queen’s favour.
After all that exertion you’ll definitely need to relax and the charming little courtyard which contains the Coach House Café would be the ideal spot to rest up, maybe have a coffee and obviously try our some of your new powers of verbal agility. I think you can imagine this place in summertime, hiving with people all sitting in the nice weather (not guaranteed in Ireland by the way) and enjoying themselves. We then head out to a place called the rock close. This is a particularly beautiful area of the grounds where you can have a nice walk. It's fairy tale landscape where you almost expect Alice to come running past chasing a white rabbit. Then on into an area which is called the Jungle.