An HFY Story : Fair Exchange & Don't. Touch. The. Ships. 2445 ~ Deathworld, War and Humans

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An HFY Story : Fair Exchange & Don't. Touch. The. Ships. 2445 ~ Deathworld, War and Humans

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Agro Squirrel Narrates

Күн бұрын

Пікірлер: 148

@warhorse03826 Ай бұрын

"don't. touch. the. boats!" habitual linecrosser

@cybercifrado Ай бұрын

Indeed. I heard it in one of his accents. XD

@dalemorgan8263 Ай бұрын

_Here comes the sun doodoodoodoo_

@Aminuts2009 Ай бұрын

With the appropriate accent of course!

@michaelyoung7261 Ай бұрын

Truly a man of culture

@war13death Ай бұрын

Except Israel, they got away with deliberately attacking our boats.

@albruitstuart8408 Ай бұрын

It's what we like to refer to as "Proportionate Response".

@grogvaughan5649 Ай бұрын

@albruitstuart8408 my line of work we call it the "John Wick Protocol"

@NXTangl Ай бұрын

"Proportionate"? No, no, it's a "proportionAL" response. The proportion in question is 1000:1.

@grogvaughan5649 Ай бұрын

@NXTangl proportionate is the past tense.. as in "we make them a part of history no longer relevant in the present"

@albruitstuart8408 Ай бұрын

@NXTangl thank you, the yes, the quote was "Proportional Response."

@jasonl9682 Ай бұрын

Amen

@mikethurman3147 Ай бұрын

I'm so happy to see an Agro Squirrel / Fat Electrician connection. "Don't touch our boats"

@Practitioner_of_Diogenes Ай бұрын

And that second story is when the galaxy learned two American phrases- "Don't. Touch. Our Boats" and "Proportional Response."

@Tiewaz Ай бұрын

That seems to be the accurate "proportional response" in the second story, yep.

@michaellewis3226 Ай бұрын

Appropriately proportional.

@mikethurman3147 Ай бұрын

"Proportional"

@KouuToriProductions Ай бұрын

So the president said, we're going to issue a "proportional" response. And what the Navy heard, was "ice 'em."

@Seastallion Ай бұрын

Fun fact: The most powerful navy in history was created because... someone. touched. the. boats! True story.

@h1n14lifegaming Ай бұрын

Not only that they were created to fight off pirates. Fucking pirates fucked up soo bad America said bet.

@ArronRatliff Ай бұрын

America: Don't Touch Our Boats! The rest of planet Earth: Dear God Don't Touch Their Boats! Up voted for the beard and algorithm with energy!

@elaniarkady7351 Ай бұрын

2nd story: Yup proportional response

@Wastelandman7000 Ай бұрын

We can laugh at them wanting crude oil, but, anyone else remember what the Nostromo was hauling in Alien? Oil and an automated oil refinery. Still easier and cheaper to make plastics from oil than from biomass I'm guessing.

@Cl0ckcl0ck Ай бұрын

Oil isn't just fuel. Using it as fuel is one of the silliest ways of using it. Most of our medicines for example started out as oil.

@danijelandroid Ай бұрын

Maybe the humans invented a miracle plastic that rival steal or we created bio-spaceships which consume oil. Or the humans were removing the oil so that those aliens won't start wars over it. That would make the most sense if the humans came to the alien planet without any ulterior motives.

@1992jkwj Ай бұрын

@@Cl0ckcl0ckarent sulphides made in part with oil as well?

@erushi5503 Ай бұрын

Story 1: Probably a merchant fleet looking for oil to sell to traditional car enthusiasts on terran worlds Story 2: "DONT TOUCH MY BOATS!!"

@achimdemus-holzhaeuser1233 Ай бұрын

BOOP!

@proberts34 Ай бұрын

An interesting take on the FAFO style of story. "FA, and we'll give you ONE chance to make it right, before you FO." 🙂

@carminedesanto6746 Ай бұрын

Habitual Line Cosser in SPACE 😆

@smugfrog8111 Ай бұрын

"Ohh shit, there's about to be more Suns out than Tatooine!"

@LegendStormcrow Ай бұрын

2 stories about Space America. Noice.

@BattleshipOrion Ай бұрын

If Fat Electrician, and Habitual Line Crosser went into space: Fat Electrician: *TODAY I'M GONNA TELL YOU THE REASONS WHY COMMUNISM IS BAD* Habitual Line Crosser: Don't. Touch. The. Boats.

@jeanannd Ай бұрын

Story 1: Maybe for petroleum jelly and other such products? Story 2: Good rule.

@jonnypena7651 Ай бұрын

A lot of vegetable alternatives, maybe gas for old collection cars? xD

@Norbrookc Ай бұрын

Oil is very, very useful for making various products. Most of the plastics we use come from oil, in addition to other useful chemicals and lubricants. So after Earth would have burned up or used most of its oil, it would become something you'd still need, so... trade for it from another planet.

@nicholaswion846 Ай бұрын

@@Norbrookc Most of those products come from the parts of crude oil that are not suitable for energy production, so its not really an either/or relationship. The more likely reason, is that regardless of how many other methods of production that they have discovered and developed, with the high level of energy demand that such a society would have, there is simply no beating the cost efficiency per unit of energy ratio that natural petroleum delivers. That is an extremely important stat when providing energy on an economy wide scale.

@robertstoneking7916 Ай бұрын

Likely past large scale energy use but lubricants, plastics, food additives, medications.

@Wastelandman7000 Ай бұрын

Probably for plastics and lubricants. If you can make it to the stars you don't need it for fuel. But, you still need to make circuit boards, insulators, and lubricate your machinery and the like. You can make this stuff from vegetable products, but, its a righteous pain and requires a huge investment in both creating biomass and processing it. Probably cheaper and easier to just trade for it.

@GenStallion Ай бұрын

Lets actually add that to the checklist. Just give us a reason.

@kurtismiller9544 Ай бұрын

For DA SKWERL and his Nest

@quoriander Ай бұрын

And for his many acorns!

@bewarethegreyghost Ай бұрын

Some of these HFY authors watch The Fat Electrician, and it shows.

@mattbrown5511 Ай бұрын

Hoorah. This 11 Bravo upholds that the Fat Electrician is watch worthy.

@mackenziedrake Ай бұрын

Excellent as always. I worry about the folks in the first one.

@seanbolster7603 Ай бұрын

It was a pt 1 to the 2nd. Lol. In my head anyway. America wanted that compound 710

@ericlestick7325 Ай бұрын

If you touch our boats we'll have to give a "proportional" response.

@Inufan2005 Ай бұрын

Nice to see our boat doctrine made it to space!

@jfpalermo Ай бұрын

Loved the story,... still rolling in laughter at the ending.

@georgepatton93 Ай бұрын

**terrified Japanese noises**

@EricTheKei Ай бұрын

For the Squirrelgorithm!

@commiedeer Ай бұрын

"Don't. Touch. The Boats!" I totally read that in Mandatory Funday's voice.

@barelyasurvivor1257 Ай бұрын

Thanks for another great read of a great story

@victortahlor4038 Ай бұрын

Thank you for the reading

@Norbrookc Ай бұрын

American history... touching America's boats results in very bad results for the country that does it.

@cybercifrado Ай бұрын

Which countries were those? Oh, right. Most have been lost to history. ;)

@Aminuts2009 Ай бұрын

Remember the Maine! ... Takes the Philippines away from Spain.

@michaellewis3226 Ай бұрын

@@cybercifrado Few are still around in reduced capacity. Spain, Japan and Germany.

@cybercifrado Ай бұрын

@@michaellewis3226 Yeah, the comment was meant to be hyperbolic.

@wendal4506 Ай бұрын

You forgot one of the originals the Barbary pirates

@luzifershadres Ай бұрын

"So, what do you need the Oil for?" Human merchant: "Well, a lot of humans like the sound of combution engines. While 90% of combution vehicles run on very safe and envirement firendly fuel, there is an backwards colony in the Bernard sytsem called The New United States of Ford-America (Trademark). These guys not only bioengeenered themself to live with the polution and workship Henry John America Ford the 112th like an god, but also drive around in 20m tall armored truck, running on Gasoline. And yes, there are even bigger 40 m tall monster trucks. Even their mother nation the Northern American States of Terra, calls them lunatics. And that means a lot when we talk about trucks."

@lawrencespruyt5053 Ай бұрын

First story, we probably found a way to make ICE space ships. Lol

@Jakes3130 Ай бұрын

Thank you sir

@deussalt4479 Ай бұрын

For the Agro-rythm!

@markshasteen4579 21 күн бұрын

As an American I can 100% say you don't touch our boats

@charleswidmore5458 Ай бұрын

nice story for independence day.

@tdofducksplays Ай бұрын

DO NOT TOUCH THE HUMANS BOATS!!

@MidnightSmoke Ай бұрын

Don't touch the ships is a good rule. Here is a like and comment for the stories, for entertaining me, to help your channel grow, to appease the great and powerful KZfaq algorithm demon, and get you the recognition you deserve.

@larrythompson8630 Ай бұрын

It’s a shame the lives lost. But often. Fewer lives are lost in total. Rather than a “proportional” response every time.

@shrillcrayfish6168 Ай бұрын

Dont touch our boats!!!

@allenmorgan1007 Ай бұрын

For the Algorithm, for the Author(s), for the Holographic Voice!

@KroMagnum4 Ай бұрын

Excellent.

@merlinathrawes746 Ай бұрын

A space faring civilization needing OIL? Possibly for lubricants, but I can't see it being needed for fuel. In other words, keep your hands off or lose your hands.

@bertcombs9944 24 күн бұрын

1940s Japan saying I warned you

@RealArcalian Ай бұрын

Greetings, Mentlegent! For the Rhythm that is Algo Story 1: Humans are Uplifters Story 2: Proportional Response

@Tejyasn Ай бұрын

Much response. Very proportionate. Don't touch America's boats.....

@roberthayes7679 Ай бұрын

Another great one.

@Therealwanderingyooper Ай бұрын

Yeah don’t touch the states ships, they get…excited

@kathybarekman5454 Ай бұрын

Love ❤ your work and your voice ❤ ♥

@jmichaelramirez2510 Ай бұрын

To make plastic! 😮

@johnnyrotten3175 Ай бұрын

4 D 🐿️ ❗ ❗ 4 D author ❗ 4 D algorithm

@andorfedra Ай бұрын

Second Story: I think the representative should have been from Japan, instead of Great Britain. it would have maximized the irony of the moment. Great short stories regardless.

@McKavian Ай бұрын

If you have not signed the Geneva Convention, we don't have to follow it.

@crowgaming2137 Ай бұрын

actually, we do. Right up to the point the other side doesn't Then, its free real estate

@EAZ36588 Ай бұрын

Kind of the Brits to give them the warning

@LordMekenshi Ай бұрын

I assume the oil was just a matter of tradition, or so they didn't pollute their air

@melkiorwiseman5234 17 күн бұрын

Oil is used for a lot more than just fuel. Plastics, for example.

@genericuser984 Ай бұрын

cool

@markojotic Ай бұрын

The idea that aliens come for our resources was always a silly SF trope. There are thousand of times more fuel and water floating in space and easy to get than on a planet.

@oldbutnotdead1 Ай бұрын

For the algorithm

@ardillamente Ай бұрын

Story 2: Operarion Space Mantis

@ardillamente Ай бұрын

Or Operation Zorak

@merlinwizard1000 Ай бұрын

6th, 3 July 2024

@spqrpraetorian Ай бұрын

A galactic year is about 250 million years, at least from the SOL systems point of view. So that empire existed for 32 billion years?

@melkiorwiseman5234 17 күн бұрын

I'm assuming it was a "galactic standard year" as in "a standard which applies galaxy-wide" rather than "a standard derived from the rotational period of the galaxy."

@chrisdufresne9359 Ай бұрын

I could have sworn that the first one was already done by Aggro. Am I confusing Aggro and NN again?

@TheRealInscrutable Ай бұрын

200K

@GR3YD3ATH Ай бұрын

🚢🚢🚢

@christopherg2347 Ай бұрын

Why are the space faring humans still using oil?

@thomasmandell3002 Ай бұрын

@@christopherg2347: petroleum based and made products are probably still cheaper than biomass based and made products.

@charlesashton6273 Ай бұрын

😀

@marvinjohnson2488 Ай бұрын

America has a habit of screwing up any one who touches their boats here. Why would it be different in outerspace?

@beingsneaky Ай бұрын

hmm you find more hydrocarbons(oil, tar, gases) and water out in space then you would every find on or under any planet so no they did not need to trade for the oil.

@Marcus_Postma Ай бұрын

I was thinking the same thing

@ianharrison5758 Ай бұрын

I assume it would be more of an excuse to open trade. Oil is oil and space may have more but gaining a loyal ally with a later apparent unequal exchange, that’s more valuable than the oil could ever be