My bad: 5'11'' actually equals 180 cm...but NO FEAR! I did all the speed calculations in Standard first, then converted each result back to metric, so although I misspoke in that one moment about the height conversion, the rest of the stats should all be right! Like I said, I'm stupid imperialist scum with a dumb measurement system :)

Don't go to MatPat's house. He'll measure you.

Conspiracy Theory: MatPat is really just a sentient Diet Coke can underneath all that skin

Nintendo: doesn't render seatbelts on the characters MatPat: I'm about to end this man's whole career

Can we just thank Matpat for giving us the fastest vehicle answers to always win? That is mad respect

So, let's gather up all these theories. • Mario is a communist, animal-abusing adulterer and psycopath, and presumably responsible for starting Mario Kart, a deadly kart-based sport. He would also win three bronze medals (long jump, high jump, and triple jump) at the olympic games. • Luigi is a multi-millionaire, who apparently has a strong admiration for his abusive brother, but actually hates him a lot. He also secretly loves Peach, who he eventually runs away and has a daughter with. He would win two silver medals (long jump, triple jump) and one gold medal (high jump) at the olympic games. • Peach has mental issues, and intentionally spread a fungal plague in order to create her subservient kingdom. She is also the mother of Rosalina, and is dead in at least one timeline. On top of this, she would win two gold medals (long jump, triple jump) and one silver medal (high jump) at the olympic games. • Bowser is a mentally-scarred orphan who is trying to give the koopalings the family that he never had, while also trying to combat the fungal plague which overthrew the goombas. • The toads are a race of hostile funguses who took over the home of the goombas and serve Peach, the one who let them spread. • Rosalina was born to a princess cheating on her lover and the rich brother of that princess' lover. • Wario is a 10-foot-tall farting behemoth. • Yoshi was racially profiled at the olympic games. • All of the above, plus some others, are participants in Mario Kart, the aforementioned deadly kart sport.

Good lord... If Mario is nearly 6 feet tall, then how tall is Luigi? Peach? *Bowser*? *Waluigi*??? Out of the whole bunch, Mario is practically the *shortest*. What is this world of giants???

Collect your “being a single child isn’t as fun as it looks” ticket here

the fact he yells "NO WAY NO WAY" when he gets 5'11" as marios official height in real time is just too wholesome

I like how matpat went insane halfway through the video after talking about the baby racers

"They're riding without wearing a seatbelt" *TheOdd1sOut has left the chat*

Imagine how deadly any other racing game is, whether made up or real.

Not only has he made mario a lot scarier, he also made the best setup in mario kart for us! (9:25)

Mario characters after hitting a wall: “tis but a scratch“

Theory idea: What is Rainbow road actually made of?

6:00 *me thinking 80 isnt that fast because everyone in michigan goes wayyyy over the speed limit on the expressway....

“Wanna know what it’s like running into a wall at 100 MPH?” R.I.P Dale Earnhardt...

I mean hey, at least when you play as a Mii the Mii is always wearing protective gear

MatPat: let’s think logically here Talks about babies driving

5:34 Man, that’s just highway speeds, here in central Alberta, Canada..not really something to be that amazed by

I’ve missed watching Game Theory. Just hearing MatPat’s voice makes me happy!

Lets be fair. Most mario games are death matches disguised as fun family entertainment. Have you ever played mario party? You have a better chance to survive the hunger games than a minigame there.

My brain: did you watch it? Me: yes... My brain: what did it cost you? Me: My childhood

" "peachy's got it" ... I'm still manly" Oh, we're not doubting that. We're just gonn ashow Ollie when they're old enough to understand humour and embarrassment.

What I really wanna know is how they dont die while the blood is rushing to their head while they’re upside down for 5 minutes 😃✋

The loophole is probably that the characters are not in the real world, so the federal laws of any country do not apply to them in any way.

What about mario party, which has people being burned, drowned, electrocuted, crushed, and MANY other terrible fates, plus some of its own high speed vehicle events that might be faster than this?

matpat: 128 km/ 80 miles per hour, damn that's hella fast germans on the autobahn: pathetic, look what they have to do, to mimic a fraction of our power

*WAIT WAIT WAIT* So, MatPat says that Mario is 5”11 here, right? I went online and checked out a few sites, and Link from Ocarina of Time in his adult form is 5”7. I feel like I need to point out the fact that *MARIO IS TALLER THAN LINK*.

MatPat doesn't ruin childhoods he edits them :')

MatPat, you're letting your inner Austin show...

5:06 "For half a decade" it's getting close, matpat... real close...

I remember watching this before I started college; now coming back to it after graduating, "coefficient of friction" gives me shivers

Now I know why you need to take algebra in school... so you can see how much g-forces Mario will feel if he brushes a wall at 5 degrees.

Is it bad that I laughed when baby peach exploded against the wall?

10:40 angry pat’s introduction

"consider your childhood RUINDED" **pauses and put hand on forhead** "YEP CHILDHOOD FOR SURE RUINED :>"

Rest of the world: 80 mph is so fast Germany: double it

9:14 tell me that didn't sound like mario 💀

This was the first episode of game theory I ever watched, and four years later it’s exactly as I remember

I find it funny how he hasn't touched on the anti-gravity stuff. And with the whole "no seatbelt" thing, they would be clinging onto the steering wheel upside down

Every mom is screaming about the seatbelt predicament

Seeing MatPat in a video from a plane makes me really miss flying with no fear of anyone telling you to muzzle up.

"oh my, that's almost 80 miles per hour, that's really fast!" *me laughing in no speed limit on the German Autobahn (highway)*

*No game is safe not even Tetris*

MatPat: Ruining Childhoods since 8.22.09

Hits a wall, Mario: You okie dokie Luigi? Luigi: I-i'm okie dokie.

Me as a german driver going 210km per hour on the german Autobahn: p a t h e t i c

Mario Kart be like: *slams into wall at 180km per hour* "'Tis but a scratch."

9:20 congratulations matpat, you just gave everyone the best cart setup in the game to win with.

1:19 I absolutely love this part

MatPat: 80 mph!!! Thats so incredibly fast!! Me: *laughs in German*

MatPat: almost 80 mph say what.... Me *a german citizien*: well that's awfully slow

Seat belts are not always required in vehicles without roll over protection. Which is probably why Mercedes can show Mario with no seat belt.

God hearing this theme still makes me so happy

Only Matpat can make Mario Kart as gory and disturbing as Mortal Kombat.

I can always count on you to ruin my childhood, Mat Pat

I remember the good old days when me and my cousins would sit on the Lawn mowers in Lowe's and pretend to brutally murder each other with shells. Ahh. Those were the days.

Love how im watching this while in a car (im not the one driving)

Imagine seeing pink gold peach dying like this? *Nathaniel Bandy happy noises*

2:20 "They're riding strapless the whole time..." - MatPat 2017

11:50 "And this is what happened:" *AD* No! Not... Messenger! Anything but that!! "(You're brain's) half it's original size!"

This is one of the most sadistic episodes, and it’s also one of my favorites as a result.

"Who cared enough about the wii u to buy that thing!" Me who grew (and is still growing up) playing the wii u: *Am I a joke to you?*

Lots argue if people prefer the Math and Science episodes or the Writing and Lore episodes, but honestly, I like to have both. Some argue that the creators don't take some of that in depth lore into account, when I'm pretty sure the creators didn't take the math and science into account either. Otherwise we'd have a Rated M Mario Kart. No matter how you slice it, let's be real, the creators don't think about that too much (sometimes). We're all over analyzing, whether it's Math or Lore, and it's all just for fun. MatPat, keep up the variety. I'd get bored of your channel if it was just Lore or just Math. I need the best of both worlds.

I love the reverence at the beggining, I love the movie 'Taken' 1000 recomend.

After this I wouldn’t be surprised if Mario could just brush off one punch man’s punch

Me: mum can you buy me gta 5 Mum: no Me: but you let me play mariokart

The loophole is probably something to do with Mario Kart being a Japanese game and that they probably don't need to adhere to American advertising laws (unlikely seeing as how they are advertising to an AMERICAN AUDIENCE) but the loophole could also have to do with the game being a racing game, or just that it's a fictional video game in general. Even then I'd assume even cartoon characters need to wear seatbelts if they were in, say, a Jeep commercial.

5:45 germans "you mean only 80 mph"

I love how it cuts to an ad right when the finger go into the saw

*what I learned from the entire thing:* Who is the fastest rider.

Game Theory is my number one homework interrupter

I was literally crying at the end of the video, crying and I love Mario kart

Hey matt maybe used his magic wond and put spell on all the characters to make sure they won't get hurt in the Cart game

I crashed a go cart once at go carts plus, and those measly slow things gave me 1. My loose tooth at that time nearly fell out 2. My forehead was bleeding 3. I cut my lip ( also bleeding) 4. I got a black eye And 5. I still have a small bump between my eyes These carts are CERTAINLY deadly

Hey, although it may be illegal to advertise a car without a seat belt that isn't a car, technically it is a go cart with a car skin.

Well, that really throws a kink in my enjoying throwing shells at my racing enemies, knocking them into walls/void, and crashing at high-speeds into other racers just to steal balloons...

5:50 - 6:15 I'm dying here! 😂😂😂

It's funny how I forget that these are theory's XD.

Mario survived all this? Take that, Death Battle!

i love how he calls it a show. hopefully we never have to see the finale.

I liked the peach bit at the beginning!

"Granted I was playing with myself" ~ Matpat 2017. Probably could have said your were playing BY yourself, but nope! But now we know

Watching MatPat freak out over getting to measure Mario in real life was just freaking adorable :)

11:08 matpat’s first 4th wall break

Mario crashes mat pat’s set Mat Pat gets out his measuring tape

The Miis wear helmets and track suits, though.

You didn't ruin my childhood. No, you just made it better.

I love how Mat Pat joked about the speed, and then F-Zero GX is just like "180 km/h? How about *1800* km/h? Pump those numbers up!"

Watching this in 2024 and seeing only GT and FT on Theorist Headquarters is a weird feeling

Why not make a theory on how they are still alive? I MEAN SERIOUSLY, HOW?!

let us take a few seconds minuts hours even days to think about how much editing mat does

Wouldn’t the red and green shell have separate results considering that the green shell Ricochets agains walls where as red shells track they’re target? Just a thought would LOVE to see this become a video

We used to play Mario Kart with our older kiddos often as reinforcement in our behavioral therapy center before the console broke and the company didn't replace it. Makes me rethink what we were actually teaching them...

I sometimes worry about my skill in video games, as I can be pretty mediocre at some of them, but Mario Kart is one of the games that I'm actually pretty good at.

*DANGEROUS PARTS OF THE GAME ACCORDING TO NINTENDO* -Babies driving 100 mph go carts -Driving over space on a rainbow -Being pelted with dagger covered blue shells and rotten fruit -Entire levels based under water with no sources of oxygen *DANGEROUS PARTS OF THE GAME ACCORDING TO MATPAT* -The angles are off

Baby peach splatters a wall School nurse: i solve this problem with the royal ice pack

I just realised that Luigi’s death stare isn’t just a meme anymore

So if Mario is 5'11... then how tall is Peach???