Related very well John. Good job.

thank you, this was heartbreaking. subbed.

Wow ! That was heartbreaking indeed and i can relate to the feeling for sure. Maybe it's just our imaginations but for me, any time i loose someone close, i always find meaning to the last moments i spent with these persons as if there was a hidden message somewhere announcing they're imminent passing. But like many things in life, we'll never know for sure right ? All i know is science can't explain everything; When my mom was dying in the hospital i felt she wasn't letting go because i was there, she had asked my siblings to tell me i didn't have to go see her at the hospital because she knew i didn't like those kinds of things. She knew me very well and was quite aware just how sensitive i was in life. I've always been close to my emotions and was never ashamed of it, it actually gave me the courage i needed during rough times. So the night she passed i had been by her side since 04h30 in the morning my brothers and sister joining later in the day. Doctors had been telling us for days it was a matter of hours before she died, but it wasn't happening and although they said she wasn't suffering i felt she was agonizing in pain. Something inside told me i had to leave for her to let go, to this day i do believe there is nothing stronger than the love of a mother for her children and in my case my mom didn't want me to see her die, not because of pride or shame but simply to protect me from the pain of seeing her suffer and die. Sure enough i left the hospital at 7pm telling my family i would be back the next morning after resting, i was exhausted at this point. I got home at 7:37 and as soon as i set foot in the house the phone rang, it was my sister informing me we had just lost our mother. I was very sad of course, but i was also relieved she wasn't suffering anymore and i had done the right thing, allowing her to leave this world doing one last incredible demonstration of love, protecting me shielding me from deep sadness and sorrow... I feel for you John and i'm sorry for your loss. If 30 years of policing has taught me anything it's that there are no coincidences in life, everything happens for a reason, you seing Tammie at the exact moment wasn't merely a coincidence, i believe your reading of it is spot on, Tammie was saying goodbye to you on a subconscient level. May she rest in peace. Thank's for sharing, God blessé