going on my first date ever (after being single for 21 years)!!

Рет қаралды 18,175

3 жыл бұрын

when all your Asian relatives start asking about why you don't have a boyfriend yet and your parents start making jokes that maybe you'll have to live with them in old age....
I went on a date for the first time in my life at the age of 21, as an attempt to enter the world of love and relationships. It was an online blind date through zoom, organised by Asian societies at the University of Cambridge, where I am currently a student. In this video, I:
00:14 introduce the independent and love-free life I have had as a person who has never even romantically held hands with anybody
03:39 awkwardly try to fill in a google form about what I look for in a potential significant other, only to find out that I don't have a type (unless it's BTS Kim Namjoon) and so just end up struggling
10:53 get my match, and fail to stalk my blind date on social media (I found the wrong people on Facebook and Instagram)
12:17 am indecisive about whether or not I should contact them, decide not to but it turns out that he emails me 1 week later and so we arrange to talk on zoom
12:57 went ON the zoom blind date, except I ended up watching a lecture for about half an hour instead because his class overran
15:04 describe my first date experience
17:00 then finally decided that the probability of me getting a boyfriend has always been so low because I have terrible work-life balance and worry about possibly becoming a crazy cat lady when I get older
20:06 and it was also my 21st birthday at the time of filming.
I've never really had any romantic experience (been forever single, never dated, never had a boyfriend and all that) so I thought this would be interesting to do. I kind of attributed this lack of experience to the fact that I've generally just focused on studying throughout my high school and university years and essentially didn't have much of a life outside of work. Very sad I know (but also very true). To be honest, I don't really mind that I'm single at the moment, it's just that I'm going to have to start thinking about love etc. at some point and so I guess here it is in this video.
Also, I've been studying remotely from my house in Thailand for an entire year because of the coronavirus, so I don't have many social interactions and so it was a nice way to meet people anyway :) If anyone would like to offer any love/relationship/dating/life advice, please feel free to leave a comment below!!!
ok just going to leave this here running away now BYE
I should be really working or just generally sorting my life out, but I already spent time making this video instead so HERE IT IS going to write essays now see you later :/// (which I guess just summarises the whole point of this video)
find me on instagram @naproud
PS This description is extremely long because I heard that the youtube algorithm is able to make better recommendations if there are more words? So here is basically an entire essay on what the video is about.
music:
Elli Moore - I Love To Hate You
• Elli Moore - I Love To...

Пікірлер: 61

@TheNunakun 2 жыл бұрын

Advice: Just make yourself available by going out to gatherings (clubs, sports, restaurants, gym groups) and let it happen. As you meet more people, you'll find yourself be attracted to certain types of people, and in turn, some will be attracted to you. Once you hit adulthood, it's likely that you'll have relationship with a co-worker (statistically), but this can be a nightmare. Trying to force yourself into a relationship is not my suggested way, as it's too construed and artificial. Eventually, you'll probably end up with one life partner, so make sure they're the right person.

@TheNunakun 2 жыл бұрын

Oh, and most important rule (not tip, but rule): Make sure you are happy yourself before inviting someone else into your life. If you're unhappy with yourself, then the problem will never fix itself no matter who comes into your life. You must know yourself, your values, virtues before engaging with another person in a deep level. I believe this is the principle factor to my single state. I'm still trying to figure myself out haha. We all are. That's what makes life interesting, eh?

@naproud 2 жыл бұрын

this is actually really meaningful advice! thank you so much :)

@sarilove123 2 жыл бұрын

totally relate girl, except I'm 26 and have my first real date ever tomorrow. So nervous, fingers crossed it goes well!

@naproud 2 жыл бұрын

oh wow!! keeping my fingers crossed as well :) and glad you could relate!

@daniellasalawu7349 2 жыл бұрын

This is me tonight! I am 27.

@ZeeA0705 2 жыл бұрын

Good luck I hope it went well for you

@acat9707 Жыл бұрын

How did it go?

@ZeeA0705 2 жыл бұрын

Girl I can relate to how you are feeling I am 28 years old and I have never had a boyfriend and never been on a date and I’m behining to think that I’m the only girl this has ever happened to point is that I never get guys I like mainly because I give up on them too soon as well… you got this just be yourself you look awesome and you have a very mature personality I’m sure he will love you to bits ❤️❤️❤️🥰🥰🥰

@swathinachiarmanivannan8280 3 жыл бұрын

this was so relatable LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL i love this naproud!!

@naproud 3 жыл бұрын

hahahaha thanks Swathi!!!

@BoiNgocChannel Жыл бұрын

I’m the opposite where I had so many ex boyfriends for the past 30 years and what’s strange for me is to not have a boyfriend. 😅 Now I’m practicing being single for more than 1 year, my goal is to be single for 2 years :))

@ailing8990 2 жыл бұрын

hahaha, I love your energy 😂😂👏 I feel you, I'm 23 and haven't had a bf yet~ but it's ok 😊 what will happen, will happen 😂 u r really cute and pretty, btw! 🔥😊

@naproud 2 жыл бұрын

Aww thank you so much! 🥺🥺💕💕

@heaaaaa5087 2 жыл бұрын

Just wanted to say, I have also never been on a date ever. I'm 19, and also hadn't done anything with a guy including holding hands until very recently. I understand a lot of the things you struggle with. I tend to find reasons to not date also, like tell myself I will date once I move out or finish my studies. Recently I was asked out by my crush and I found reasons to cancel on him, logically talking myself out of dating him even though I wanted to. My advice is maybe to try to figure out whether it is a fear for you, because sometimes these excuses we make are only covering for a bigger reason, like the fear of intimacy, social anxiety or even abandonment issues. If not, then I'd suggest you just live in accordance to your values and what you want whether that's studying. If you find it is just a bluff for the root cause, then I would suggest you try to ease yourself into dating or find ways to deal with that main issue. For example if you have bad social anxiety, sometimes it helps to plan the date yourself and make it as laid back as possible with the least amount of anxiety triggers like choosing a casual walk in the park over a dinner/lunch date. Also, just because you mentioned how you never go out that could be also why you have never dated. A lot of my experience with guys happened naturally, being in social settings and similarly because I am rarely in those settings I rarely interact with guys. Maybe try to attend more social events, this can allow you to naturally find a guy but not focus on that rather than dating sites and blind dates that is only about dating and not just general socialising. That was long, I hope it is helpful.

@naproud 2 жыл бұрын

aw thank you so much for all of your advice! :)

@sarashams9782 3 жыл бұрын

I feel like you keep saying '21 years of being single' but I hope you understand that the first 17 years probably don't even count 😂 but like how is everyone expected to have had a relationship by 21 even???? im literally the same as you and an awkward mess lol. like there are no prospects in my future rn either so dont feel to bad 😂

@naproud 3 жыл бұрын

hahahahahahaha that's very true about the first 17 years 😂😂

@adritamitra_ 3 жыл бұрын

Same here 🤣 I'm 19 and I find dating so awkward 🤣

@MoLewis57 25 күн бұрын

I didn't go on my first date until I was 21 either. 33 years later, and we're still together.

@huh4963 2 жыл бұрын

This is so relatable though lol I’m about to go on a date for the first time ever. So nervous 😓

@naproud 2 жыл бұрын

omg good luck for your date! hahaha glad you found it relatable :)

@zirahazmi793 2 жыл бұрын

23 years and counting…. of being single. So I can totally relate to the first two min of this video 🥲 never been on a date, not even like a not serious date lol. Ndjdjdkdi

@eliseg7888 3 жыл бұрын

Just found your channel and I love it already! And you’re an army! YESSSS 😁💜

@naproud 3 жыл бұрын

aw thank you so much!!!! and yes hehe 💜💜💜

@patricelloyd639 2 жыл бұрын

This is extremely relatable 😂

@jorb3884 11 ай бұрын

STOP THIS IS ME RN

@jisoohugsmembers8006 3 жыл бұрын

You seem so sweet and I enjoyyyeddd your video. I related a lot. Hope u have a wonderfull life. 💞

@naproud 3 жыл бұрын

awww thank you so much, this is so kind of you 💓 hope you have a wonderful life too!

@heaaaaa5087 2 жыл бұрын

You're so cute, I'm happy I stumbled upon ur channel!

@naproud 2 жыл бұрын

aw thank you so much 😳💖😆

@MrRyu719 3 жыл бұрын

Just be yourself. That’s legit all the advice I have 😂

@naproud 3 жыл бұрын

it's good advice though :)

@jaiden_knudson7898 2 жыл бұрын

I'm almost 20 years old and I've never dated or kissed or hugged anyone

@hony1717 10 ай бұрын

omg the fish is on point

@nayelimirandaf. Жыл бұрын

I am not the most suitable person to give a love advice... But maybe this subject has more layers. As you said, something has to do with you being busy, but also maybe, just maybe, could also be because you want to do things right in all aspects of your life. Give yourself the opportunity to let things go in that area of your live and talk to persons that wouldn't be your first choice to talk to.

@totovich8740 2 жыл бұрын

I Love The Little House 🏡🏡🏡

@TheNunakun 2 жыл бұрын

I've outlasted you by a whole decade haha. Basically, I've been working (excuse) and not prepared yet.

@Anne-fg1ld 2 жыл бұрын

Same exact situation here

@jenjemtentremrhs1897 3 жыл бұрын

Nice sharing

@naproud 2 жыл бұрын

thank you!

@sapphiiee 2 жыл бұрын

24 and went on my first ever date a few weeks after my birthday, and it was rough 😂 lots of awkwardness from my side but after a few months and lots more dates, I'm a little bit more confident and know what I like, dislike, redflags etc. But all this to say I relate so much from this video, I have little to no social interactions and I kinda shut myself out of the world and the whole dating scene haha. Just kind of mentally drained from the experience 😂❤

@attapun_an 3 жыл бұрын

(In terms of finding someone advice) Open up about about your physical insecuties to a guy friend. In his words "that's fine, I'd totally [redacted] you" Totally not what I was going for but oh well.

@attapun_an 3 жыл бұрын

Just to clairify nothing happened, so I'll be joining you in the 21 and never dated club too 🤣

@naproud 3 жыл бұрын

hahaha I think there's actually a lot of us 🙃

@mtape1234 2 жыл бұрын

I want to say something but I'll keep it to myself since nobody understands.

@ishakshamsudin5640 2 жыл бұрын

Happy birthday na na.You are not in a paradox but just that you don't really make a 💯🧡 effort and focused on your personal life as against your studies and now your career.This lifestyle and ambition if prolonged can be damaging in the long run.

@naproud 2 жыл бұрын

honestly, I do agree with you :) thanks for the birthday wishes + comment!