A bloke i knew got called blisters. He appeared after all the hardwork was done.

Later, Steve Jenkins would be adopted by a Chinese family & go on to co-author a cookbook with Lee Mack.

"Monastery" was fucking art!

Lol monastery his last name was monkhouse absolutely hilarious xx

Boots. His name was Mike. He wore winter boots in the winter. The audacity.

i have a limp due to a hip condition so my nicknames at school were penguin, pingu, happy feet and my personal fav limp biscuit all for the same reason

Oh my god my nickname was monastery

I was called "Penny" for 8 years, because I said the phrase "In for a penny, in for a pound" once (!) in 5th grade

Allow me to personally say.... ...nicknames can be brutal.

Greg's enjoyment makes these great audience nicknames so much better.

I love Greg's reaction to 50p head!

My best mate during high school was known only as 'Tuna' for 5 years. Because he once made a tuna sandwich at a friends house.

There was a guy in school that we called Pup for 20-years without telling him why. His whole family ended up calling him Pup, which was hilarious because the reason we called him Pup was because his mom could be a real bitch.

I lost it at 50p head.

there is a lad in my school called cabbage, because he bought fresh chopped cabbage off a year 6 during primary, after being told it was weed 😂

I laugh more at Greg laughing than anything else he's said on the stage. Lol

18 months is fuckin brilliant

I have a friend called Spaghetti Daughter, or just Spaghetti for short. her nickname is this because when we first met her she was eating spaghetti. We knew Spaghetti for at least a year before we found out her real name.

Is Pop Eye the same Stephen Jenkins who co-wrote Lee Mack's cook book?!??!!

One of my best friends in school was called "Donnie" because in an argument someone told her she looked like Donald duck (she doesn't really). The nickname stuck so long i once heard her mom call her that 😂

I actually believe everything he says is true 😂😂😂

My nickname was Hyena and no it wasn't because of the way I laughed but because in recess I always came in to the cafeteria late and had my lunch between trays of unfinished food and it appeared as if was eating the leftovers of everybody else's meals.

Greg is awesome. He gets as much enjoyment as the people he is talking to.

Mate of mine with a bad stutter - Airlock. Cheers from Zambia, Africa.

They say bullies can't take your name, Well when I was bullied my mom went into school and threw the guy against the wall. Then for 5 years I was called Harry by everyone, including family....Harry was the bullies name!

bagdhad lol

My nickname through high school and beyond was “Mohawk”. No reason, I didn’t have the haircut, read the novel, or have any event that would cause it. I just had a stoner roommate who got stoned in the first week and just started calling me it. The teachers called me it, the students didn’t know my real name, they even gave me nicknames on my nickname. Mo, Mo-baby, Hawkster, etc. They’d even ring up my mom and try to ask for me by that name.

Similar to "bad back", I once met a guy nicknamed "head wound". He went to boarding school with a friend of mine. When they went off to college, being normal college students, they went to a party. Being normal college students they weren't financially well-off, and they were also in a rural area. So the party had an empty beer keg strung up as a "poor man's" mechanical bull. So this fellow is rather drunk, hops up on the keg, which is naturally unstable, and he falls off immediately. Being the "cool dude" that he was, he was wearing his sunglasses. Upon impact with the ground, the sunglasses broke and cut his face. It didn't scar and healed up in a few days. But regardless, he was henceforth known as Head Wound.

There were quite a few nicknames in my year... Cheese: A guy who always ate cheese sandwiches in primary school. Coco Pop: A kid with a mole on his neck. Hips don't lie: Some girl named Shakira. Orange Peel: A girl who always had far too much fake tan on. There were some nastier names that I'd rather not mention! xD

I've been called Georgie since I was in year 6. I'm 32 now, and there are still old schoolmates who don't know my actual given name.

I love this man

My mom went to school with a guy, who they still to this day refer to as butt, because he during a football match once showed his butt. This was 40 years ago.

Name is Stacey. Had a period, sorted it but thereafter was Stayfree 🙁

We had one person in my year who was called piggy because he looked like piggy from lord of the flies film. There was also a german kid nicknamed Metric because he measured everything in the metric system. They're both still called that after 5 years.

I’ve seen this multiple times and laugh every time. I’ve gone to a live performance of two big name comedians..enjoyed the show but nvr laughed out loud. Greg kills it every time.

There was a very sweet stoner a couple of years ahead of me @ university who was known as Steel Balls because he'd taken a particularly brutal hit between the legs during a soccer match but managed to hobble off the field under his own power.

Two words: Scoliosis Boy

Last name Choate. Stupid kids called me Sargent Schultz from Hogans Heroes. Funny name for a girl. Greg is hilarious😂😂😂

My Uncle called me Bugsy. His daughter called me Buck. My named is Rebecca.

This is fucking Gold

The thumbnail to this one sums it up really.

18 months is so clever I would Insist on being called that

The routine which made me buy the Firing Cheeseballs at a Dog DVD.

I always wished for a cool nickname. But so far, it was 'goose', (gans, in my language) because it rhymed with the first part of my surname, Jansen. And I believe...that's kindof where it ended. Perhaps an "Eey-Jeej" which is how we'd pronounce E.J. (my initials.) The last one was Poekey, (Poo-key) but I've made that one up myself. I was called Poekey for about 10 years...and some people still only know me as Poekey. But again, it was a name I made up for myself, like Widdekuu and not one that was given to me. So I feel it doesn't count.

My nickname was Dora the explorer because we where lost in a theam park and i desided to look at the map

we had a guy at school called SWISH It was the sound his sheets made at night when he would beat off. Everywhere he went he got the swish sound effects. even fro m the girls. Teachers started calling him swish thinking it was cool. LMAO

At my school there was a Pakistani boy called Heeslate.... Because we saw him walking towards school after it had finished and said "he's late".

I love him!!! God he’s funny!!

Three finger franky, girl who had just 3 fingers on one hand

I love this guy

I was nicknamed Jenn-Train in high school for no reason whatsoever other then me being a class clown and another class clown, Katie, liking the song "Crazy Train" and somehow it merged. We had a guy named Adam who got called "Cheesecake" and no one knows why; there was also a tiny kid who was like 4 feet tall who we started calling "Shorty". I can't remember any more.

Super sexy funny guy 😂

monastry is my favourite

There was a guy in my high school who wore a Mr Bubbles shirt as a PE shirt. And everyone started calling him Bubbles. Poor guy, I don't even remember his real name anymore.

We had a boy at secondary school known as toast or “toastie”. His clothes used to smell of a burnt smell. Poor boy. Looking back, I think his parents would char his polyester uniform in the tumble dryer.

We called a guy's girlfriend Carrot Soup because she had red hair, none of us liked her as she was a heinous bitch and who likes Carrot Soup? We used it as a code name to talk about her in front of him. As far as we knew, he had no idea. Went camping one time and for food he had brought only a bag of mini carrots to eat. At some point in the night, all of us high and drunk in the woods, he decided he was going to make carrot soup to see why we all hated it so much and talked about it non-stop. He borrowed someone's pot, boiled some carrots until soft then mashed them into a warm paste. He took one spoonful, stood up and hurled the carrot soup into the woods and screamed, "GROSS! I FUCKING HATE CARROT SOUP!" Everyone killed themselves laughing, he stood around confused what was so funny. I never found out if that was his way of telling us he knew what we were talking about and if he too was trying to express his dislike for the girl...subtly or if he remained oblivious.

Baghdad is the best, it’s so simple and now he’s a dad

I got Cyndi Lauper because....my hair is red. **SHRUG** (And Puddles for a while because I'd spilled water and they thought I'd pissed myself. Hated that one.)

Had a buddy called Phil. His last name was McCracken.

I had a mate called Bozzer because instead of saying bus he said boz, once.

In uni I knew two guys who were called “Spew” and “Target”. During frosh week there was a from party where they were doing keg-runs. A keg at each end of a corridor and competitors ran from one end of the hall to the other chucking a beer at each end. One fellow came out of his room to complain about the noise at the wrong moment and well…Spew did…and Target was.

50p head is fucking amazing

At our school in the 80's, if you were fat, you got called Bubbles. My older brother was very fat then, and when his mates met me, they called me Bublet. I was as skinny as a rake at the time. Had a teacher in high school by the name of Mr. Caripi. An automatic pool cleaner invented in South Africa is a Kreepy Krawly, so he became Caripi Krawly. I was one of 8 Robs at our pub Blind Rob, Rob A, Tall Rob, Big Rob, Bob, Rob Mac, Rob H, and me: Gay Rob. I'm not gay, but don't ever walk into a bar singing the last song you heard on the radio. Idid that twice, first was 'I Need a Man' by Man Parrish, the second was 'I'm The Only Gay Eskimo In My Tribe' thats it- Gay Rob.

I was called nintendo simply for the fact that I had a hoodie that said nintendo on it.

think I'm way to sensitive feeling sorry for this people especially mumbo 😁

Friend in my class named Smiley- every time he farted, he smiled

Some kid decided my name in high school would be Joshwe (pronounced Josh-way) because he claimed it meant “gay”….. not gay, never met the kid before, never spoke to him beyond him informing me of my nickname…..

I was called 'orange eagle' for a good few years at school because one day after using red hair chalk, I came to school with dayglo orange hair as a result of only half of it washing out

I had a few nicknames that were put together, so my main nickname is "chippy" simply as it refers to my second name, then it turned into "chippy ray cyrus" in reference to Billy ray Cyrus because I had a pony tail that looked slightly like a mullet then it was finally formed into "chippy ray Vader" because I have asthma and breathe heavy lmao

We had a lad the girls called Thunderball... It was said he farted when he came ..

A boy in 7th grade had a pencil in his pocket pointing down, he was jumping down the hall, fell and stabbed his nuts. He was there forevermore known as 'one nut wonder' Arrested for drug dealing interesting man

Life ain't easy for a boy named Sue. But to get any nickname beside powerwanker? That by itself is legendary

At one school I had a back brace so my name was Turtle, and at another it was Possum because I "have a ratty face, but in a good way"

I don't know where he says it, but the one he tells about him and the guy who shat his pants is funny

I was called Spencer for two years because I wore a jacket from some random minor league softball team that said . . . yep you guessed it Spencer. Two years later the name was Starfox same story but it was a t-shirt! Lastly I was called Teddy because my last name is Graham, Kids are so clever

There should be statues to great comedians.

im not shy im leaving a comment to say that i too have a friend thats gay and called andy and he's called gandy

His second DVD is much better, but this one is pretty great anyway

Knew a kid whose nickname was Scrubby. Don’t know why, maybe because he always had a ton of gel in his hair.

We had shitboy... His surname is Whitehead, that got changed to shitehead for a couple of years since about 2006 is been shit boy... See him quite often and he hates it!!!!

He wrote my name :)

Does anyone know where this is from? Is there a DVD of this gig? Thanks 😊

People with nicknames I know, Worm, Kak, Phil the psycho, pumpkin, brother Dave, Fat Ash, Adder.

can somebody explain the 50p head joke to me?please. I'm from Germany and I don't get it.

I was called Smartie for a couple of years, because 1. I liked smarties a lot 2. My name begins with s I was called diabetes girl for two years because of my diabetes, a cruel one. Then recently, Pacem which we got from a school mass hymn and for some reason it happened.

I went to school for half a year in Australia. none of the students could pronounce my name right, so they just called me "fuckus" (yep, that's right). it got so bad so fast that my classteacher had to have a one-on-one talk with me and asked me to intentionally mispronounce my name to quickly quell the possible extasy epidemic that was in the making. it was quite effective, tbh.

fish fingers

I had a teacher in my secondary school whose nickname was 'paedo archer' because someone saw him come from behind the sports hall wearing lycra

I don't get the reason for "Polly" getting his name...

mate at my schools called Leslie because he got a hair cut that made him look like a lesbian. lesbian to lez to leslie

I got the nickname 'wooden shinpads' and also bullet header from football

Hold the fuck up in an episode of would I lie to you lee Mack said a story about making a Chinese food cook book with a Chinese guy he knew from his school years called Steven jenkins he was English but adopted by Chinese people

Can someone explain the toblerone boots and 50p head to an American?

I dont understand 18 months joke, can someone explain please?

8:40 help me, can't understand the joke.

Legend states that this show is still going on to this day, even after everyone in the crowd has mentioned all their nicknames, they're somehow overcome with more and more names! Now, it is the longest running comedy show to date!

Could someone tell me what Greg is saying at 8:39. Can't seem to make it out.. Thank you!

not a super funny story, but i have a mate and once i went to hang out with him and his mates that i had never met, and one of them was called Spud and since it was the first time i met them it was hard to remember all their names so i ended opp calling him Stub because i couldt remember, no for 4 years all his mates have been calling him Stub instead to piss him off.

monastery\ monkhouse --- LOL

So ummm my nickname was since elementary school, and frankly still is, Joke, reason is quite simple and self-explanatory, because I was a non-stop barrage of jokes, good or bad, it didnt really matter to me. But because my friends are assholes they added a twist to the origin of that nickname which was as follows: When I was born, the nurse brought me to my mom. My mom, holding me in her arms looked at me, then at the nurse and said: That must be a joke, right?