SORRY ABOUT THE AUDIO CHANGES - I see now that I can't lean forward and talk. 😊

I was poor for a big part of my life, so now I'm a bit of a hoarder because I learned to save anything I could for the worse times to come, and even though I'm financially pretty stable now, I struggle to change that scarcity mindset.

I notice a common theme with hoarders. They all suffered a significant loss that they never dealt with. They project their feelings on the items. Clutter insulates them from an unsafe world. They avoid facing their inner pain. They justify their behaviour in their mind.

My “collecting” has always been high. I grew up a little on the poor side and always was the last (if at all) to get the newest cool toy or shoes or clothes. I grew up feeling very second best because of it and always felt left out. I also grew up in the country and didn’t have any friends nearby, so I learned to fill my time and emotions with what little physical things I DID have. From childhood to an adult, I always had a pretty good handle on my collecting. I had a lot of stuff, but it was always organized and fairly clean. I stopped collecting most things in my 30s because I wanted to behave and look like more of a responsible adult. I wasn’t really happy not being able to collect or enjoy things. I was depressed some too. I missed having stuff. Then my 40s and the pandemic hit. I started to collect to curb anxiety about my age and the dangerous disease. I had major depression from the pandemic and the state of our world. I also started to realize more and more I’ve always had ADHD and a lack of dopamine. So the collecting filled my dopamine needs too. But I’ve let things pile up. I’ve collected way too many things. I try to collect everything because all kinds of things bring me joy. It’s just too much. I can’t collect everything and have every hobby. It only interests me for a while, then I move on to the next so I can get the dopamine high again. I’ve started medications for depression and anxiety, and I have a stimulant gif ADHD I haven’t started yet. The depression is lessening, but I still have the need for the dopamine of collecting things. I need to get rid of things so I can enjoy the few things more I love rather than it all just piling up on me. I have to pick favorites and that’s hard. I hope I can learn how to cope again and weed needless things out.

My dad is a hoarder and it had a big impact on me growing up. We never had friends over when we were kids.

ADHD can make it hard to finish things and make decisions and organize your space.

I believe a traumatic event can trigger hoarding. My grandmother started hoarding at 55 when my aunt ( her daughter) brutally murdered, before that she had a home that was featured in Home and Garden. When she died, there was only a pathway to the kitchen.

My mother used to be a huge hoarder we had an intervention with her and as time passed she decluttered her home.

I'm a college teacher. Books and papers and publications and teaching materials. I have to be really strict with myself and keep moving them along out of my house as I read them. Books included. They get donated to the library on a regular basis. It's a struggle, but I'm good at it now. I used to have boxes of them that took up a whole room in my house. No more! That room is now a lovely home office and perfectly neat. No piles anywhere anymore. You can do it!

My dad was a hoarder, and basically died as a result of it. When we had to sort out his hoard, it was so overwhelming. It made me so sad and angry that he lived like that, but at the same time I tried to empathise. It was hard to do. Thank you for the video

My mother is a heavy hoarder. She has already cluttered her whole bedroom which was a pretty big room. She now can't even enter the room and she doesn't even know what is inside it anymore. Furthermore every corner in our apartment is cluttered and sometimes she puts things in my room so I don't notice... She loves to buy things from the flea market and also takes things that people put beside or in dumpsters. Sometimes those things are broken or they don't work properly but she sees is at as great deal. Her main motivation is because "this will once be worth a lot" or "this is worth a lot I am sure, I payed so little for it". She always talks about selling these things to make big money but she never even sold ONE single thing. I think her big trigger was the war she had to flea with my two brothers and when she basically had to leave everything behind and having no money when she came to a new country but she also didn't have a lot when she was growing up, too. I also think that my father's abuse triggered a lot, too (they are still together). I was never particularly hard on her because I know that she would go crazy without those things and this was her coping mechanism. But I am glad that she is starting therapy soon! (but not because of that, but I hope she will talk about this problem, too)

I think many hoarders become this way in their so called 'golden years.' Getting older, aches and pains set in, no longer working, no longer able to drive. Many older people become lonely, don't or can't see their children often enough. Have no support system. So, they let themselves go, let the house go, become depressed, and a hoarder is born out of sadness and loneliness. We need to talk about depression in older/elderly people. We need to take better care of the senior citizens in our lives. I know my grandmother was so lonely and depressed when my grandfather passed. This is common. Why doesn't anyone talk about the elderly and depression? It's as if they don't exist, or are invisible, once they hit their 60's. They matter. They should be treasured.

Hoarding is sad to witness, especially when you want to help and they won't let you. A horrible thing for a parent to leave as a legacy to their adult children.

My problem has been that when a loved one dies, I have problems getting rid of their stuff. It's like getting rid of it is getting rid of them all over again. :( It has taken me YEARS to get through this emotionally.

I've had this tendency since I can remember, but it's gotten better over the years, especially after facing the consequences of what hoarding can lead up to. Emptying the flat of my deceased father, who also had hoarding tendencies, was one of the worst, most tedious experiences of our lives, not only because of the situation itself but because of how incredibly overwhelming it was for his family to decide what to keep and what to give away. The huge amount of things he owned (he had, for instance, 3 copies of the same exact DVD, not even special editions, some of which were still in their original plastic packaging, unopened) was so absurd and unnecessary, it made me realize 1: one day you die and you take nothing with you and 2: we should think about those who are left behind with the chaos we once created. I'm not blaming him. But I think it's important to think about certain things while we are still alive. Believe me, whenever I start accumulating stuff again, I think about this and I stop myself from getting and/or keeping things I don't need. I'm aware I have an issue with this, but I don't let it control my life and space.

Thank you for talking about this in a respectful way.

“Some people are just more junky” Feeling attacked

I'm a hoarder that's been ready to clear out everything for a few years. I've unfortunately been too sick with autoimmune diseases to fulfill my goals. It's frustrating to be ready, but not have the energy or physical abilities to accomplish what you know will be a huge improvement for mental health. But luckily I've found a new appreciation for life and all that it entails and I'm determined to get it done. 😊

Top mental health content in KZfaq. We are all so thankful, Dr. Marks.

Thank you for this. *I know I have hoarding tendencies due to scarcity fears and then emotional attachments.*

My mother passed nearly 6 years ago. I hold onto everything that was hers because it is all I have left. When anything that was hers breaks or is damaged it really hurts me. It's like her things are so important to me. I can't let them go. It's like letting her go and I'm not ready or willing to do that. My guest room is a shrine for her. I have abandonment issues. Have no siblings and Dad lives over 1000 miles away. I love him so much, but can't make him move here. I feel like I've lost almost everything important in my life. Grieving is a monster. As my family shrinks and I get older it becomes so much harder.

Grew up in a hoarded home. I would put bags of stuff together like unwanted toys together to the good will. My mom would pull them out and tell me how sad they were I didn’t want them etc. I hated it. My husband has lots of stuff. You have to make rules about where his stuff can go. Not anywhere that impedes my ability to live so not on the washer or drier or not in front of the fridge or on the counter. It makes me very uncomfortable when I don’t have clear space to operate. That being said I’m not a clean freak by any means.the one that makes me the most frustrated is that these people can never find anything.

To me, when someone hoards, the underlying reason is some form of early loss or abandonment issue. It can, I think, also come about from a victim mindset - where people don't necessarily hoard, but when they, say, eat, they just (because they're depressed) throw the scraps on the floor near them. I used to do this.

I just got back from taking a large load of my stuff to Goodwill. It is very hard for me to get rid of things. When I got back, I had to sit and do my progressive muscle relaxation and deep breathing to try to control the panic attacks. I feel as if a part of me is missing. I am getting up there in years and am not in the best of health. I don’t want my sister and her son to have a lot to shovel out if I should die. I still have a long was to go but today I did make some progress. If it is just stuff I can throw away, I have to bag it and take it out to the trash right away or I will go through it and take things out. I am not as bad as those that they show on tv but bad enough that I know a lot of it needs to go.

This happens to me but with the photos in my cellphone..haha sometimes it gets harder erasing them from it.

My mom is the borderline between horder and junky. She just can't pass up a deal and shopping is one of her hobbies. I remember she used to try to put clothes in my closet growing up lol

What does it mean when you “ collect “ things because of abandonment issues, yet if someone said “ I like that “ you happily give it away, because it’s your control to give it away and not being forced too? 🤷🏽‍♀️ Great video!

I’m a case manager for a mental health center in a major city and I found you because I also suffer from ADHD and I really like some of your videos but it seems totally serendipitous that you post a video like this and I just got a new client on my caseload with the exact same issue😮‍💨😂

Thank you for this video. I sent this to my dad to help explain to him part of why I’ve never been able to keep a space clean for a more than a short period of time. I thankfully am not at the extreme level of hoarding most people associate with the word, and am occasionally capable of cleaning an area when I get a burst of energy and hyperfocus. But it’s something that I struggle with and am deeply embarrassed about, so thank you for speaking on it in a compassionate manner.

My grandma animal and insect hoarded and it made me so uncomfortable :( I secretly gave out a few small reptiles and insects to friends who had others who I knew could take care of them, and the fact she never noticed really spoke to her care level of them :////

After going through a rough few years and feeling very lonely, I began compulsively shopping as a way to both get out of my house due to stressful family dynamic and to make me feel like I was improving myself (ex: buying this plant will make my life better because it will freshen up air in my room and make it more calming). I would get an anxious rush when I bought something I new I shouldn't be and began letting go of many of my financial goals as a young adult because I didn't have any hope of being independent. I recently had a bit of a lightbulb moment and realized that it was the beginning of a hoarding issue; I've had some success at backing off but I still get these 'projects' I need to complete like a cute little shade garden I'm growing in our backyard that I sometimes buy plants for. The more I've focused on strengthening my self care habits, the better this has gotten and I don't feel the same need to compensate with items, because my distress tolerance is improving :). Hoarders are always shown in a garish way, when the home is so cluttered you can't move and it appears very difficult to relate to. But every person who deals with it started somewhere; something happened where it became a problem and the stigma associated with the label makes it harder for people to notice it within themselves or their loved ones before it gets out of hand.

My partner is a hoarder. It makes my life miserable. What can I do? He insists he has no problem. He has more than 50 credit cards and a debt of more than a million dollars, which he pays taking money from one credit card and transferring to another. Our house is out of this world. Piles and piles, layers and layers of rubbish! He buys shoes and clothes that he nerves wears, he collect newspapers to read one day but never reads them, he collects watches, fluffy dolls, shirts, papers, newspapers, small toys from McDonald’s or 7 eleven, wires, plugs and adapters, mobile phones… and much more. We travelled to Australia, Southeast Asia, Europe and the only thing I remember from these places is the souvenir shops, he would spend hours in them.

We were able to pick out hoarders without ever seeing or hearing about their stuff in the first 10 minutes.(we operated self-storage) Difficulty making even the smallest decision on their own, so they procrastinate, lose their keys, wallet, credit cards. We had one customers credit card for 3 week (she was usually there every other day) she had no idea it was missing. They required a lot of patients to deal with because they had a hard time following rules. We would just take a deep breath and try to guide them to their next step understanding they are God's most tortured creature.

This was a very useful video. The weird thing is that at times, I have been wondering if I had hoarding disorder but I don't have the urge to acquire new things. I'm a doll collector but because I lack the space I actually don't acquire dolls often. My issue is getting rid of items which have been gifted by loved ones or old love letters... As if somehow it could make up for the overwhelming feeling of not being wanted... Old clothes too remain here for ages without being used because... And it really can get out of hand, cluttering my living spaces... And suddenly I get fits of throwing stuff into trash bags and out without warning... And all is well for a while... 🙄

As a master's level CMHC student who`s entering a Ph.D. program; I find Dr. Marks` videos quite helpful. Please keep up the good work. There`s not a lot of people from my community working in the MH field. It`s truly an encouragement!

Aside from traumatic experiences and needing therapy, I would love to hear someone talk about how hormones affect certain disorders. For myself, I have PCOS. Long story short, due to my progesterone being rock bottom I felt weak,tired,depressed and had zero motivation. My living space suffered, and I didn't care. Fast forward to now I've been taking progesterone and vitamins and supplements that help me better manage my pcos symptoms and balance my hormones. I now suddenly want a nice, functional living space. I've been decluttering like crazy and I feel like I've been given a new life. I can see how if someone never seeks treatment for hormone disorders it can spiral into hoarding situations.

You are awesome Dr. Tracey! Thank you, for all that you do 🙏🏻

I appreciate you more than you know! I have been watching your videos for three days straight. Thank you 🙏🏾❤️

I would like to see a video on overlap between hoarding and neurodivergence, most notably ADHD or Executive Function Disorder. Because in my experience, they seem to force-multiply: Having trouble scheduling things makes it hard to deal with the mess, and having trouble *remembering* things makes it feel like losing objects in which memories are stored is literally losing part of my mind. I quite commonly get to the end of a period of time and realize that I've failed to do a thing I'd intended to do, or said that I'd do. Maybe it's hanging up the socks, maybe it's dealing with a computer issue, maybe it's making an appointment or looking up some key information for something that needs to happen the next day. I can have every intention in the world of doing this, and yet I'll pass the entire night without thinking about it, until it's too late. (I've started using timers.) The trigger for recalling the thing is something in that mind-sorting process at the end of the night. Now extrapolate that to more long-term things. Said I'd eventually do something for someone, make something for them, contact them to touch bases again after six months. I might literally have no recollection of this detail *until* I run across the object that reminds me that the detail exists -- at which point I get a flood of detail, and maybe a pleasant "oh yeah, that thing!" or maybe an unpleasant "oh crap, I forgot to do the thing again!" Therefore, getting rid of that object is tantamount to destroying that memory, because it destroys the trigger *for* that memory. On a more personal level, a lot of my creative projects are long-term, in large part due to that executive dysfunction, so I flit about among various projects and put many projects on the shelf for months or years or even decades. And my notes are *always* a mess. So I have all these messy, half-formed notes that I can't seem to bring to order, and then I have a time disconnect between stages of the project. If the project notes just vanish (e.g. someone throws away a random set of papers), well, it might as well be that the project never existed. No matter how dear it was to me at the time. (Also, I have a paranoia issue with things just vanishing where I know there's an absence but don't know what that absence *is* -- especially with online things vanishing, but also with objects vanishing. It distresses me.) So while it's pretty clear that hoarding is an issue for me, it also feels like a lot of related functions play into that. My difficulty organizing *anything* I want/need to organize, focusing on tasks, not getting distracted or sidetracked. My Intuitive-Perceptive (MBTI) nature, which wallows in possibilities but finds it excruciating to narrow down, cut, prune, get rid of options. My aphantasia, which makes it significantly harder to picture things I'm not actively looking at (split-screen is a godsend). I also derive pleasure from the knowledge that I possess certain things, even if I'm not currently interacting with them even visually -- e.g. it pleases me that I own a box of pretty marbles, even though I haven't laid eyes on that box in years and I'm not sure where in my bedroom it's located at the moment. I enjoy the fact that I own a couple dozen random plushies, even though I don't play with them and don't often look at them. And when I come across a thing I own that I haven't thought of in a long time, I tend to get pleasure just from it sparking that memory. Objects can make me recall creative projects, phases of my life, friendships of old, musicians I used to enjoy (and still do, upon being reminded that they exist), shows I used to watch, games I used to play, plans I used to have (and might still intend to do, once I'm reminded of them)... large chunks of my awareness through time, chunks that are lost to me unless triggered somehow. So it's not merely that I have trouble letting go of worthless items; it's that (a) the stuff I value might seem worthless or low-value to others, because they don't grasp the memories and emotions I have invested in a particular object, and (b) I have trouble sorting the worthwhile from the worthless, due to my other mental health issues / neurodivergence.

The uncluttered space looks cluttered to me 😅 3:54

Good info. I appreciate the definitions provided & the clarification of symptoms.

You are so incredibly helpful. Thank you for taking the time to create this content.

Man I have a problem you nailed not just one but a hole row of nails, really glad I found your channel very insightful thank you

Tracey!! You’re looking gooodt. Curls popping and I love the color.

Thank you Dr. Marks. I am familiar with this topic. Very helpful information. You giving us comfort without expecting in return, is commendable. Appreciated.

I so smiled when I saw that thumbnail.

How have I not run into Dr. Marks before?! Subscribed! 😁 My alphabet soup: Bipolar, ADD, hoarding disorder, PTSD, med-related EPS, and I used to get panic attacks where I'd derealize. I'm already picking up techniques from your videos that I want to try. Thank you!!

I recently found your channel.. so pleased that I did! Dr Marks, your videos are very informative. Even more, you very kind and approachable. Your videos are easy to follow and understand, and add clarity to complicated subjects. I have subscribed and look forward to future videos. PS- why are all the kind and empathetic Drs all on KZfaq??? If only I could find a Dr like Dr Tracey Marks or Dr Todd Grande locally!! You guys are a tough act to follow. And you’re very pretty too Dr Marks. 🥰

What a beautiful and calming backdrop! 😌🍃

Thanks so much for another thoughtful, informative mental health video.

Dr. Marks You make great content thank you .

you make very nice and informative videos Dr. Marks.....Thank You!

thank you for shining light on this from a place of empathy and understanding. i’m not a hoarder but i can sympathize with the disorder.

My mother is a hoarder. Her house...well, I am estranged from her currently for other reasons but I actually felt so stressed that I would have to deal with her house after she passed that I mailed a letter asking to be completely removed of all power of attorney responsibilities, so now one of her sisters is first on the list. I don’t blame my mother for it, I just don’t want that awful stress and anxiety added to my life. It’s overwhelming.

Thank You for the the clip, I will definitely be conscious about my STUFF

This video presentation is so helpful in my preparation for the NCMHCE. I must explore your other videos. Thank you.

I am the opposite of a hoarder. I freak out when I have lots of possessions and declutter occasionally.

Okay. I feel attacked for sure. I have had attempts at Decluttering (KonMari). And I guess it is about time, I go for it again and downsize mindfully even further. I surely have a lot of unwanted stuff in my room, bathroom, kitchen, living room, and well, almost everywhere. 🤷🏻‍♀️🙈 I stopped shopping for clothes 3 years ago, and determined to go buying only when I have created a lot of space. I feel that was one of the best decisions ever. ☺ Need to apply it in other areas as well. 😊😇

Thank you for inspiring me! I'm going back to school to become a doctor, just like you!

Thank you for these informative videos! Takes the mystery out of psychiatry.

Dr. Marks, there are so many comments on this video from people who are loved ones of hoarders. Might you consider doing a follow up video at some point on this topic that addresses how those loved ones should deal with hoarders? Maybe along the lines of what will or will not help a hoarder? Some people are suffering financial/emotional/etc. losses doing major house decluttering, arranging buying a hoarder another place to live in or even taking in a relative to live that hoards. It can be hard determining if one is helping a hoarder out versus if one is not having healthy boundaries one should have for themself and is rather enabling behavior that may not even change. Thanks for your consideration.

Yayyyy finally one about my disorder 💜(unless i missed a previous one!)

I have impression that de-cluttering became an obsession too (hope just a fashion though :).

KZfaq algorithm is really tryna tell me something on this day 😂😂

Thank you so much for your videos they have helped me so much. ❤️

Very useful info. thanks 🙏🏽🙏🏽

Guy in his 60’s was a maintenance man at a local university and went to the hospital with pneumonia. His family went into his home and cleared everything out to clean it up. However he also was a collector on top of the hoarding and they threw out some historical letters that he had among other things. He was a regular at the store I worked at and I remember his anger and disappointment towards his family that did that to him and I found it no coincidence that he died a couple of years later.

Listening closely to the " how to treat it". I'm only in my twenties and I'm leaving my parents home. I can't walk in it from one angle to the other. That's when I understood there was a problem.

Great video...would love to learn about the correlation between hoarding clothing and childhood poverty 👆🏽

Excellent video. Thankyou.

Here’s another angle to a hoarding motivation: an unresolvable concern that the items find a disposition where if they can’t do someone some good, they will at least do no harm, e.g. broken glass, unserviceable knives, unrecyclable plastic waste, or appliances that will not be repaired. Combine this with impaired decision-making, and stuff is going to pile up for sure.

If you have been treated like an object for your whole life, you feel objects are people, because you can't get the people around you to treat you like a person so you relate to objects as a way to subconsciously protect yourself. This is lived experience, take if you like, ignore if you don't. You need to get rid of the people who treat you like objects (you can't change the people), and the clutter will go. This is harder than it sounds. Bless you if hoarding is a habit - You are valuable and I love you.

Excellent video as always.

Mine is because of procrastination also living alone, if someone is coming to my home I will make an effort to declutter , sad really because I much prefer living in an organised space, so procrastination/mild depression are my enemies

I believe I have a hoarding disorder, I am working with a psychologist to be diagnosed. One day he asks me "Does having someone else touch your things to be discarded cause you to feel as though you were assaulted?" I told him I have no idea because the idea of someone touching my things causes mental distress. A family member asked me why I still had a certain item that was most definitely rubbish, I told her to get out of my house

Where is the threshold between collection and hoarding? Crafters who keep huge acquisitions of supplies and materials (in hopes of selling handmade items made with said materials).

Grandmother was a hoarder. I didn't know my father and his siblings lived like that until my grandfather passed...he had a stroke and was found sleeping on a mattress on the floor in a cleared out spot the kitchen (the rest was covered in papers and thick layers of dust and boxes of random stuff). The stove was also slowly leaking gas, which may have contributed. This happened when I was an early preteen and it took me a very long time to figure out how it impacted me mentally. Im better now but I still have some hate toward my grandmother, it's hard to let go of.

She is unique ,awsome ... very different approach , and very effective. Thank you Doctor & bless your heart Fe'him Sri Lanka

I'm glad how I for once don't relate to a mental disorder video 🤣 Thanks Dr. Tracey

thanks for posting this, this was good

She also forgot how hand-me-downs, momementos over time and heirlooms can be overwhelming. These can often be the hardest to let go because of the providence of the items as well as usually more unique items that cannot be purchased or replaced if they are gone. This is my primary problem at the moment that some items are connected with trauma so I just can't process through them. All the therapists within 30 miles of me are fully booked and telemedicine was a sh*Tshow. So, just don't know what to do from here

Great video.

One time I was at my mother's Hoarding home and went to the kitchen looking for a bottle opener and inside a drawer were over 200 Gatorade caps. I threw them all away and later when she found out they were gone she got upset and when I asked her why she was saving them she said " I lose my Gatorade cap sometimes while I am drinking, and I can just go get a new one from the drawer. She actually has more of an emotional relationship with material things than her own family.

Dang you cover ALL of my issues!!

Tracey I think it's worth mentioning ADHD here too. So many of us ADHDers struggle with excessive clutter all the way through to hoarding due to issues with executive function. All the things mentioned at 4.15 in the video are common in people with ADHD. Personally, I've found having recently been diagnosed as an adult with ADHD and starting stimulant medication, that I am finally able to keep on top of things and start getting through my historic clutter too (though it's not a quick process!). The change has been quite radical, I'm finally starting to live life like I always wanted to but was previously unable to manage. I know you mentioned other anxiety disorders too.. skin picking is quite common in the ADHD community as well, though it's thought to be more related to over or under stimulation than anxiety. That being said, plenty of us have anxiety too anyway as a spin off condition from years of daily struggles (my anxiety is much reduced on ADHD meds as I can finally DO stuff rather than feeling stuck, paralysed and overwhelmed most of the time). I know you mentioned antidepressants as a possible help but these seem to have a reduced effect, if any, in those with ADHD as it doesn't treat the root of their issues, so I thought it was worth flagging ADHD in relation to hoarding as you didn't mention it, as if someone does have the condition, getting diagnosed and treated for that might be the best way to help with hoarding issues.

Great video! ❤️❤️❤️🔥🔥🔥

I think I am a low level hoarder. I have a lack mentality. All the traits you named describing hoarders, I associate with. ALL OF THEM. But, like I said, I think I hoard because I remember (after financial abuse by my ex husband) not being able to afford simple basic things and if I could afford them, it was all I could afford until my next paycheck. So, I started “storing up” just in case. My financial situation is way, way better along with some of my thought processes but I still have a hard time letting go of “things” that I don’t use, want or need. I only recently (within a few years) stopped buying “just in case” things. I have a junk car and another car that’s on its last leg and cannot move myself to get rid of them. 😩

I had a loved one who became a hoarder & later a animal collector..She was always fond of beautiful things, painting ,certain clothing etc.when she was younger & always kept a closet full of stuff to the point of over flowing..But I noticed this behavior really picked up after she suffrered some major events in her life..lost of her Mother & having to move from her beloved neighborhood & community...I had also read that a trauma or traumas can act as triggers for the onset of this behavior..

I love your channel!

i think my mum is a mild hoarder. when 3 of us work overboard, our bedrooms + living room, kitchen turned into her storeroom, where she keeps empty bottle, old paper bags, foods (she will keep food that is expensive, then forget about the foods when they are expired), new plates (which she will never use or want to give it to us, she will only use the broken plates), broken chair etc. when i went back to visit my parents, i feel like i am living in a big messy storeroom, which is hard for me because i am kind like a minimalist. Dr. you are right, we tried to get rid of the stuff when she was sleeping or went out, when she realized that, she was so upset with us and the space that we just cleared, filled up very soon. we told her the hoarding problem and how this is affecting our life, she doesn't admit it, get angry and cry, so we just keep it to ourselves. we never or hardly (i can't even remember the last time that happened) have friends or relative coming over because of the hoarding. whenever, i went to relative house, how i wish my parents house is like that- clean and tidy. Don't get me wrong, my mum is a great mum.

ADHDer here, got my KZfaq set to 1.25 speed by default but I just started watching this video on my phone and oh my god you have completely different energy than what I actually thought 😂 can't go back though, 1.25 for life 😂😂

Yeap, you described me to a tee. I am 61 and my father was the same way at this age. I will look for free or low cost help as I am tight for funds. Thanks at least there is some help available.

Thank you thank you 🌷

Great video

I used to struggle with a sense of low self worth and was messy and hording all my life. Now I fixed a large part of the self worth issues and I notice that I am way more organized. It's easier now to correctly assess stuff's value. Do you think there is a relation between low self worth, and feeling stuff is too valuable for you to throw away? Do we assess the value of stuff by comparing it to our perceived value of ourselves? Thanks a lot!

I always feel like I'm a hoarder-light, but I sort of binge and purge. Things get to a point where, if I have the time, I go through and break ties to things and throw things out. It's painful, but not as much as if someone else was doing it. I've had some traumatic events surrounding destruction or loss of personally important yet mixed value items, so sometimes it feels like I'm deadened to the upset once it gets bad enough.

I wonder, is there a term for people who compulsively throw away stuff instead of holding on to it? And might the root cause of that perhaps be the same as when people become hoarders?

Hi Tracey, thank you always for your thoughtful and useful videos. I live with my mother who has been a hoarder through my entire life. She has become better in the last few years and we've been working through her clutter (and the dilapidated apartment) a little at a time, which has been nice, but when she is feeling bad and can't control her hoarding, I feel like what she's suffering is executive dysfunction. She simply cannot process any item in front of her and categorize it as "needed" or "unneeded" because even a single object becomes unmanageable and overwhelming in her brain. I've also seen some professionals speculate about a connection between ADHD and hoarding. Do you have any opinion on this? And of course, as others have pointed out in the comments as well, traumatic events have a lot to do with hoarding... and my mother has had plenty of those, starting with her own bipolar mother being hospitalized periodically all through her childhood, and growing up very poor with no access to things she needed and wanted. So there's definitely also that aspect! The reason my mother is feeling better lately and can manage her hoarding better is definitely also because she has finally retired, and major work stress has been removed.

As a kid I would pull trash out of the burn bin and my closet and desk were full of junk, fabric scraps, used up pens and sharpies, paper, old food containers I thought I could use for crafting etc but luckily my mind switched in my late teens and I never became a hoarder. Instead I became one of those people that love getting rid of stuff. The less stuff I own, the better I feel.

My sister is a “mini-hoarder”. Although she isn’t as bad as some, because of where she used to live would check regularly. She recently had to move in with me (health). So now, for me, is a problem as I am on the opposite end of the spectrum and believe everything needs to have a place. As I go through her things, we have to have a discussion about everything! For example, she has over 500 different coloring books. There is no way anyone can possibly use that many coloring books. But trying to get rid of any of them (suggested donating them) is an argument. Her room is full, my room is full, and I am in high anxiety over all this!