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How To Deal With Sociopaths & Unhealthy People: Practical Tips -Psychotherapy Crash Course

  Рет қаралды 21,728

Támara Hill, MS NCC CCTP LPC

Támara Hill, MS NCC CCTP LPC

Күн бұрын

Пікірлер: 76
@TherapistTamaraHill
@TherapistTamaraHill 4 жыл бұрын
This is the last video on this topic for a while. We're talking trauma treatment all of March! Let me know if this video is helpful to you!!
@93Crash101
@93Crash101 3 жыл бұрын
Do you have any advice on actually dealing with these people directly. A relative of mine died recently and now I am legally required to deal with my aunt's (who is a very nasty piece of work herself) crazy husband. As soon as funeral, inheritence and one property dispute are dealt with I am going to completely cut contact, but right now confrontations are unavoidable.
@tiablasangoriti8347
@tiablasangoriti8347 3 жыл бұрын
Yes, It was helpful. I loved the intro.
@tiablasangoriti8347
@tiablasangoriti8347 3 жыл бұрын
I would love to work with you. I like the way you present information about trauma and Narcissistic Abuse. I'll stay tuned for more pearls of wisdom.
@hisalone7166
@hisalone7166 3 жыл бұрын
It’s so difficult when it’s your daughter and she uses your grandchildren to punish us for her shortcomings......
@sophiegriffin8351
@sophiegriffin8351 2 жыл бұрын
I would tell you the same thing I tell my grandma. Those kids are family and we love them, but unless they are in danger or if you aren't willing to take them away from their mom just stay out of it for your own good. It sucks for them, but trust me passive confrontation never works with this people or even for those kids (despite your maternal insticts telling you otherwise). It's better if you keep a distance, even if you here from them only once a month, regardless of the shorcomings they tell you about keep distance. For the worst cases shortcomings are always a thing in their life.
@vap322
@vap322 Жыл бұрын
I cried the whole time watching this, as I'm dealing with a sister who is so uncaring, unemphatic, selfish, and just does things that hurt people. She drains me of everything, and always has. Now at 42, I am thinking it's about time I move on. Hardest decision I've ever made.
@hello-gj7iu
@hello-gj7iu Жыл бұрын
oh my god same 😦😊
@eriomnyc6073
@eriomnyc6073 4 ай бұрын
Usually there is an empath and a sociopath or narcissist in the family . I am empath too- don’t feel bad - they don’t feel bad for you , the best thing you can do is let them go and don’t go back
@marybischoff-moore8615
@marybischoff-moore8615 2 ай бұрын
I have watched a lot of influencers like yourself in this field and I have to tell you you are one of the sharpest praise God for you …. you have explained things that no one else has in a way no one else has literally blown out of my mind with your wisdom thank you❤️
@user-oz7nw9sq7y
@user-oz7nw9sq7y 3 жыл бұрын
I’ve been learning to recognize these types before inviting them into my life. You cannot get away, so the best thing is just to get them out of your life. If it is your mother; father; brother; sister; friend; neighbor etc. etc. You have to get them out of your life. They are insane sick miserable disordered people and you will end up sick yourself. RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!
@TherapistTamaraHill
@TherapistTamaraHill 3 жыл бұрын
I can't disagree. You're right. Run...in most cases.
@Chericherry4
@Chericherry4 2 жыл бұрын
I'd rather manage the situation and not cut the person out, as long as I can get by with seeing the person just a couple times a year.
@magicmank6893
@magicmank6893 3 жыл бұрын
I'm dealing with one at work at the moment I try to stay away from this person as much as possible she's very negative and hateful sapping my energy
@ificouldtalk8952
@ificouldtalk8952 3 жыл бұрын
Same here and he is my direct manager! I have been trying to study gather up ways in order to destroy him and venge foryself and all the people he messed up.
@taketheredpill1452
@taketheredpill1452 3 жыл бұрын
excellent stuff. I had to learn that all the long way, so nice to see it summarized. I'd add that, for me, emotional processing was the answer. That means, upon waking and going to bed, I spend as much time as my body needs, or I can handle, working through my emotional state. This is paying attention to what my body and subconscious are telling me. Yes, the messages and the realities I need to become conscious of are scary but the beauty is that by taking it SLOWLY I become immune to the fear. SLOW is a huge factor in this. Doing the work is enough, so taking it slow is a massive priority. This is also why I walk at the gym. Emotion is tied into fat, particularly for emotional eaters, so losing weight quickly means a huge dump of emotion onto our plates, which we can't handle and then we binge to stabilize. Better to walk and deal with our thoughts as we are walking.
@PraveenSrJ01
@PraveenSrJ01 2 жыл бұрын
Sounds exactly like the relationship with my parents.
@dark7angel456
@dark7angel456 Жыл бұрын
Me too. They are haters and scary woth no empathy
@TheTugboatgirl
@TheTugboatgirl 2 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for this information. I didn't realize that I was already practicing your tips until I watched this video. But it has been confirmation that I am on the right path to cutting a toxic person out of my life and I'm so much happier without them living rent free in my head.
@TherapistTamaraHill
@TherapistTamaraHill 2 жыл бұрын
You're so welcome! That's good to know. You're on the right track.
@katherinevernier4945
@katherinevernier4945 Жыл бұрын
It’s so hard to come across someone like you. Again thank you for putting these videos out there
@TherapistTamaraHill
@TherapistTamaraHill Жыл бұрын
You're welcome. I appreciate that these kind words. Thank you! I'm glad that I can be here to help.
@flowerchildfreedom474
@flowerchildfreedom474 Жыл бұрын
He makes me feel like I'm losing my mind at times , he has no boundaries. When he doesn't pay rent he will lie about it or make an excuse such as I don't like the landlord or he's a drunk etc . He says things like that about any friendships I try to create so now I have 0 friends as I don't want to feel like crap anymore . I just don't have the tools to know how to stop it
@ip3931
@ip3931 5 ай бұрын
I just do not know who and what to trust at the moment!
@TherapistTamaraHill
@TherapistTamaraHill 5 ай бұрын
I totally understand that.😔
@katherinevernier4945
@katherinevernier4945 Жыл бұрын
I again wish you were my therapist
@skylinebusta2842
@skylinebusta2842 2 жыл бұрын
I’m dealing with a sociopath in my life and even though he drains my mental state everyday and psychologically manipulates me to do his bidding, he is still caring and I consider him my close friend. Every time I try to distant myself he will try to say things like I’m a piece a shit, “you’re a bad friend”, or “after all the things I’ve done for you…”. I been distancing myself from him for a while now to benefit both of us, but he just doesn’t get it and I can feel a sense of hate he has towards me now. Maybe it’s for the best, even though he is my only friend. Maybe what he saw is that I have no friends, so it made it easy for me to be used , or maybe I’m just crazy and should be grateful for the only friend I have.
@surprisesofjoyfulness8147
@surprisesofjoyfulness8147 2 жыл бұрын
You're not crazy. He is unhealthy for you. You can go and make OTHER friends. Better ones. They cut you off at the knees just to keep you weak, isolated and theirs. Kick him to the curb. Better no friends ( for a time) than a "friend" that behaves as an enemy.
@chrystaljaneorica2724
@chrystaljaneorica2724 3 жыл бұрын
And thank you, I've learned so much.
@TherapistTamaraHill
@TherapistTamaraHill 3 жыл бұрын
You're welcome!! Thanks for watching.
@-HASH-MAN-
@-HASH-MAN- 4 жыл бұрын
Much love, great information, many thanks.
@TherapistTamaraHill
@TherapistTamaraHill 4 жыл бұрын
You're welcome. Glad it was helpful! Thank you!!
@Chericherry4
@Chericherry4 2 жыл бұрын
Just what I was searching for, thank you.
@TherapistTamaraHill
@TherapistTamaraHill 2 жыл бұрын
You're welcome!
@susanritchey1849
@susanritchey1849 4 жыл бұрын
Thank you...I always feel like I get some education when I watch your videos. Your information gives me insight as to how I can handle situations in my life. Thanks so much...please keep posting your videos.
@TherapistTamaraHill
@TherapistTamaraHill 4 жыл бұрын
You are so welcome! Thank you😊
@bethsimm3144
@bethsimm3144 4 жыл бұрын
Ive been attending weekly dbt sessions and it is useful to some, but i feel the way to move forward for me is to learn about me and why i have some really odd ways of thinking and worrying and also a sense worthlessness that i know is unhealthy but its a fact that i need to unlearn In DBT they say when you have a thought just notice it and let it pass without judgment. I understand the logic in that but i feel like i am pushing things away that have surfaced for a reason, i might be wrong but i want to challenge my thoughts and process the trauma then let it go and move on
@bethsimm3144
@bethsimm3144 4 жыл бұрын
That comment was in fact with reference to your mention of finding your own therapy and and seeing what works best. Im sorry 🤦‍♀️😵
@jtFacts77
@jtFacts77 4 жыл бұрын
Ok. So prior to this video, I thought a "punch to the face" (only for men of course), was the solution for dealing with Sociopaths and Unhealthy people. After listening to you, I will try your way😁😂🤣.
@TherapistTamaraHill
@TherapistTamaraHill 4 жыл бұрын
🤦‍♀️🤣🤷‍♀️ Well, some people feel that way! The therapeutic way I would suggest.
@mrlonglegs1946
@mrlonglegs1946 4 жыл бұрын
"only for men of course" sounds a tad sexist don't you think?
@lorijones5561
@lorijones5561 2 жыл бұрын
What if this person is my mom and is a delusional elderly that took care of me my whole life ? 😔😫
@TherapistTamaraHill
@TherapistTamaraHill 2 жыл бұрын
This is horrible. I'm sorry to hear that. I'm not clear on what the question is but I'm guessing you are referring to walking away? It will certainly be more difficult in this scenario.
@omegaforeverpahrump4436
@omegaforeverpahrump4436 7 ай бұрын
I can’t get away from this person I work with this person I’d be out of a job if I wanted more of a healthy lifestyle my work loves her so much they think that she’s a savior and she’s caused so many people to quit attacking people been there for 10 years I’m using your information so I can deal with this person at work. It’s horrible.
@TherapistTamaraHill
@TherapistTamaraHill 7 ай бұрын
I'm so sorry. That sounds very imprisoning and it is. I've seen this scenario happen to my clients in the past. You have to find any way you can to set boundaries, make your boundaries known, and stick to them. One thing she cannot fight you on is consistency. Then I would look for ways to "document" her behaviors and prove that she is harassing you. You want firm proof as well and not just a record of things that "might" be seen as harassment. An example of this might be email exchanges, text messages, or video footage of her around you. Hang in there.
@ARH830
@ARH830 4 жыл бұрын
Thank you!
@TherapistTamaraHill
@TherapistTamaraHill 4 жыл бұрын
You're welcome!!
@nensi5813
@nensi5813 3 жыл бұрын
Your videos are really helpful
@TherapistTamaraHill
@TherapistTamaraHill 3 жыл бұрын
Glad to hear that!🙂 Thank you.
@surprisesofjoyfulness8147
@surprisesofjoyfulness8147 2 жыл бұрын
Is it just me,or is there more sociopaths now? It's as common as a cold,and they group together! Yikes!
@TherapistTamaraHill
@TherapistTamaraHill 2 жыл бұрын
Either that or we're just more knowledgeable about it as a society. It's always hard to tell. It's just mental illness. Is it getting worse in our world or are we just more knowledgeable and therefore it seems like we see it quite a bit.
@Lonnieplaxico
@Lonnieplaxico 4 жыл бұрын
Another great video.
@TherapistTamaraHill
@TherapistTamaraHill 4 жыл бұрын
Thank you!
@Lonnieplaxico
@Lonnieplaxico 4 жыл бұрын
You are welcome...
@truthteller1973
@truthteller1973 2 жыл бұрын
Love your videos really apprdocte them👑💜
@TherapistTamaraHill
@TherapistTamaraHill 2 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much!❤ Glad to hear that.
@sogb620
@sogb620 2 жыл бұрын
I’m dealing with one of the people that ran the Elan School. She is playing mind games and married to my partner’s father. She is controlling and has accused my partner of mental illness with the employees. This is scary! I need help with this!
@TherapistTamaraHill
@TherapistTamaraHill 2 жыл бұрын
This is scary. I'm so sorry. Once you learn their patterns and how they behave, you can survive and get stronger. I might do a video coming up really soon, live, where I give you tips on managing these people. I welcome you.
@sheilaslaten1061
@sheilaslaten1061 3 жыл бұрын
I'm asking for help with a 4yr old sociopath how do you handle them, teach, train them, when there are other children and adults who also have deal with the child's sociopathic behavior.
@rpm3305
@rpm3305 3 жыл бұрын
Read "Survival Strategies for Parenting Children with Bipolar Disorder: Innovative Parenting and Counseling Techniques for Helping Children with Bipolar Disorder and the Conditions that May Occur with It. " Good luck.
@surprisesofjoyfulness8147
@surprisesofjoyfulness8147 2 жыл бұрын
Well,sociopaths or potential sociopaths DO NOT respond to punishment. They respond to Reward.Their brains release 4× more dopamine when they get a reward. Reward good behaviour. Teach empathy in little lessons. No shaming. None .it makes them worse! Hope this is helpful.
@Anna-gg1wp
@Anna-gg1wp 3 жыл бұрын
Run away...change ur adress change ur name chnage ur wig color, change country!!!!
@TherapistTamaraHill
@TherapistTamaraHill 3 жыл бұрын
🤭🤫 On a serious note, I agree!
@Anna-gg1wp
@Anna-gg1wp 3 жыл бұрын
@@TherapistTamaraHill 😂
@Judah2019
@Judah2019 Жыл бұрын
Where or how do you find healthier people. My therapist is saying the same will happen it happen once I become more healthy or can it happen now?
@TherapistTamaraHill
@TherapistTamaraHill Жыл бұрын
I think the key word here is "healthier" and not perfect. I often explain to my clients that we are all broken in some way and we all face a "heart problem," meaning that no one in this life is going to be "perfect" or "better" than the other. The issue for many of my clients seems to be that they cling to unhealthy connections because of trauma, interest, stimulation when with them, or some other reason. I encourage then to follow after those individuals who have a healthy idea as to where they want to be in life, have healthy values, and can add (not detract) from your life. To find these people sometimes means we have to improve our own self-esteem and wait for them to cross paths with us, OR intentionally place ourselves in positions where these people may be (i.e., church, healthy spiritual groups, clubs, therapy programs, social clubs, etc). I hope this helps!
@japamebqkbvqw
@japamebqkbvqw 9 ай бұрын
I have a friend named Rei, he's probably a sociopath. He had a very close friend but he just said "I used you for entertainment, and you were fun to manipulate". I don't really like the guy and I blocked him, but I'm thinking a way to contact him again. I once texted him a loong message on discord about his behaviour and he needs to change. He just read the message and started yelling at me tomorrow on school... Well I'm really scared of him but I guess *there is nothing we can do.*
@jodygirl
@jodygirl 28 күн бұрын
What if you are married to one? Should you divorce?
@JohnSmith-no2me
@JohnSmith-no2me 2 жыл бұрын
What about tips on how to deal with a child that suffers from sociopathic tendicies
@marksmith3892
@marksmith3892 4 жыл бұрын
Yes!!!
@TherapistTamaraHill
@TherapistTamaraHill 4 жыл бұрын
LOL 😆
@chrystaljaneorica2724
@chrystaljaneorica2724 3 жыл бұрын
I'm trying to help someone dear to me. He's obviously a sociopath. But how?
@TherapistTamaraHill
@TherapistTamaraHill 3 жыл бұрын
It's a good question but a difficult situation. Treatment of these individuals is close to impossible in most cases because of their inability to experience and show empathy. They also struggle with accountability and management of relationships. They lack a lot of traits and characteristics that help to make healthy relationships. If you find a specialist and the person is willingly going to counseling, there may be some therapeutic work that can be done.
@mariahconklin4150
@mariahconklin4150 2 жыл бұрын
@@TherapistTamaraHill I’m dating one and it’s been pretty tough. He constantly mirrors me to keep me close and when he sees that I’m close he seems to be somewhat hurtful or maybe it’s just my BPD. It kind of sucks. Been depressed for a day. I’m considering ending things unfortunately. Idk if it’s my BPD though which he seems to somehow trigger it or I trigger it myself. I have no problem discarding him which is painful not only for myself but for him also. Thanks to all of our parents and how much they suck we are who we are. We’re both messed up it’s sad.
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