This is fantastic. I see how I deal with my children now that makes them close up and not hear me. I need to go from purple to green!

I feel like watching this over and over again

Great video! The content reminds me a lot of Dale Carnegie's book "How to Win Friends and Influence People". I think the key is to genuinely listen to others and genuinely understand their feelings and situation. This sincerity is what I think ultimately leads to others trusting you, and in turn opening up to you.

If I like that ? Are you kidding me ?! I LOVE this ! Wow ! Eyes opening, awareness increasing, it opens up to solutions. Thank you.

Beautiful.. Psychology, philosophicaly explained. Nothing short of excellent sir. Please keep posting on such videos.

Wow thank you so much for this... As a mother of very adult children this is more pertinent than ever... I'm getting so much of this wrong. Now I see a way to improve.

Dr. Jenkins, you are so charismatic! It's so pleasurable to listen to/watch your videos! And the information is so valuable! I am so glad to have found you! Many thanks! Wish you the best!

this man has a soothing voice. If this doesn't work for you get a paper write what you want to do write the things you are scared of and cross out the ones you can change and deal with what you can't, it helps with confidence

This is brilliant in its simplicity and power. It sheds light on all of our interactions. Now I understand why I often make people feel defensive and resistant, even though I want to be of service to them. I have new eyes. Thank you for sharing this!

How appropriate that this video is released on the very day that my daughter returns from an 18-month volunteer missionary experience. This is the daughter I refer to in the video and she gets this! DrPaul

Oh my, the red and orange is sooo precise

Absolutely, positively, some of the best content and well put together video that I have seen on KZfaq! Please keep doing what you're doing! You are helping us live our best life! 🤗

Thank you. Just thank you. I feel like you shook awake my mind, body, and spirit.

Dr Paul, your videos keep on giving…5 years on. Happy Christmas. This really helped.

Honestly a great video, I can see how this works, thank you!

Insightful and colorful lesson ☆ Thank you Dr. Jenkins! Favorited.

Brilliant, so wonderful! Thank you for this. The good lord knows I needed this

you are SO good at this holy cow

GREAT VIDEO - Love this. Works for any situation at any age or stage of life at home and work.

Just wow. Thank you for this video🙏🏾

This is one of the best videos ive ever seen on yt

Thank you this was very helpful and informative 👍👍

Wonderful, thanks Dr

This is a jewel. Thank you very much for sharing your wisdom.

I needed to hear this thank you

So powerful something I need to listen to again so that it makes me a better me. Very helpful at this time as my teen and I are working thru things. thank u

Great way to put this in perspective!! Thank you

Wow!! This is really impactful!!

Thank you so much for all that you do to make the world a much better place!!! Keep em' coming!

So good!!!!

Thanks this helps a lot, a close friend is struggling and I really want to help them as they helped me a bunch in the past

Genius video damn!!!

A Paradox but really logical. I totally agree

This video is amazing

I tried this GIT SO MANY FRIENDS valuable long lasting friendships! Plus it definitely works I wonder why people just OPEN UP AND SPILL ALL The NEWS lol applying this works naturally. It's the Mind Science here

love the quadrants, feeling brown, need to be more green.

I left and can't turn back but if he ever finds the courage to approach me and try again I want to be prepared, so I'm here learning. I trust that he will be back. I want to be able to meet him halfway.

The influence quaderant is a brilliant tool in helping to understand emotions. Your fun to learn from and a Super Gem . This paradox was a tricky thing to solve but with practice and using your quaderant it will become easier. Do you have a similar tool in how to help someone get their interests back ? And also one where someone knows things needs doing but can not get focused into picking up the task to be done ? I put your skills onto our fridge to remember how you explain it and where anyone can see it, we chat over our coffees. This should be taught in all the schools to help all the children. Thank you lots for your brilliant advices and the subtitles too.

I like that !

Fantastic, wow ...Dr do you have more on the green quadrant ? Would you pls share the name of your book with more details on going green?

Great video. Though I wish there would be more examples about the green quadrant. The idea is understandable, but I am not sure how to successfully get there. Thanks!

You're the best

I just found your channel and it is excellent. Thank you for this video. Do you have tips on examples of conversations in the green? And maybe how to avoid looking for others to like you? Thanks so much!

Dr. Jenkins, I love that video of yours and I'm excited to find a psychologist. I happen to have a dream of becoming a psychologist just like you, but I got less than no idea of the how-to stuffs....where can I find the guide who walks me towards there??

Good lesson. Thanks for sharing. Can you share more?

Hello, it would help me to understand more if i can have few examples of the green colour quarter of the above square in the video, pleaseee.

I definitely feel I fall into the Criticism area quite often, both with my kids and also with my wife. So the tough question: what are things I can do to practice "being in the green" without it shifting into "How others feel about me" or right back to "How I feel about others?" Look forward to your feedback. Thanks!

So the green zone is about empathy (including compassion...)?

Any practical scenarios for the green quadrant

You should do a Ted Talk! Perhaps you already have

How do you get in the green box? Did you write your book the influence quadrant?

Excellent video. But..., I have a question. If I go into the green quadrant won't I be putting the person I'm listening to into the red quadrant, making them self-conscious and anxious?

So the point is that in order for us to have influence and be loved, we need to lead someone we are wanting to influence into the red quadrant of self-consciousness. Isn't that what therapy is? Getting people to talk about how they feel about themselves? How else will someone become self aware? What quadrant is mindfulness in? Do all non green quadrants have any redeeming value or should they be avoided except presumably during a therapy session? Secondary feelings and focus are not unimportant, just not primary. Complete avoidance of how do I feel about me seems counter-productive. Were you possibly saying that these three quadrants should only be avoided when trying to get someone to open up to you or respect/love you? Then where are the positive words associated with the other quadrants? If someone is being honest with how they feel about themselves or me, it makes me want to reciprocate (such as with a friend or my daughter) and open up also. Either the chart is so simplistic as to be unhelpful or the video is too short and lacking in important detail. I normally enjoy all your videos. This one left me scratching my head.

Have you published the book ?

Hello Dr Paul. Amazing and very well done and informative video. I would just like to ask, I personally find it very difficult to get into that green zone of "What do you think about you" when talking to someone. Would there be any tips or phrases that could transition a conversation into this? Thank you

How do you do this naturally? When I'm talking with people that try to soothe me or be my therapist it is off putting.

How do I really do it tho, like get in the green box, how do I think about how they feel

This was mind-blowing! But, what if I need help with getting people to open up to me when it's not my first time meeting them? What can I do then?

Why do I feel like I'm in a therapy session... not a bad thing

Critism is authority puting self above HOW do you feel about you! Influence serve others as the same parts of your brain that go of when having sex and eating food will fire and wire so serve!

This paradox is really frustrating because that's how it goes for me. I maybe just have a hard time dealing with a problem with another person and need direct guidance. I have a friend and we had serious problems in the past that I can't completely let go. We had periods where we didn't talk for more than a year but somehow we always end up again on the same conversation we've been having for 2 years. Recently I just decided that I just need to let it go, because he acknowledged his mistakes but doesn't know how to properly apologize which for both of us is miscommunication. When I dropped my grudge, I'm still asking a question, why are you always coming back in to my life? What purpose can I give you? What are your feeling towards it? And I always get nothing because the person grew up strangely and now has a kind of a barrier where he doesn't let people in. He doesn't show the weak side of him and always portrays that he doesn't care about anything. At one point we concluded that maybe it's a sign of a high ego, but I need to know what he feels. Because he hurt me, I forgave him. Even though we fight all the time, he still comes back, but he doesn't say why. How can I influence him to open up to people and talk about what he really feels. How can I stay in the green quadrant to influence him about something that's clearly in the brown quadrant. I'm just completely lost now. And I can't just end the friendship. He is a great person overall but he is like a brick wall that doesn't care about a thing in the world, only about himself. And doesn't let anybody in.

Do you help remotely

What would you say to your teen child that acted inappropriately in public because they were drunk?

in your theme music I can make out "We are" and nothing else. What is the rest?

The green square here is love, but I would change its colour from green to white...

but there was never advice to help someone open up. help them open up about their problems.

👍👍

Alot of people don't want to open up

BTEC Alvin Stardust

It's so hard for me to open up to other people. If I focus on the "green", how others feel about themselves would this help me as well?

🥰♥️🙏🏻

So how to be in the green? . Give me an example. What are the things we do that's green? I need an example to understand😂

I am green but also red and orange at the same time. I want people to be green about me. Then I could let my anxiety and insecurity go forever.

How To Get Someone To Open Up To You aka How To Get Someone To Enable Getting Killed

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