How to KNOW When a Man is SERIOUS About You ..

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Күн бұрын

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• Hardly Initiated Podcast
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#relationshipadvice #datingadvice #marriageadvice
🕘 Timestamps:
00:00:00 Introduction
00:02:09 Meet Crystal and Dr Nicole
00:03:25 Dating Multiple People
00:09:50 Are they showing up for you
00:12:38 Women like to chase
00:18:22 The TRUTH about casual dating
00:25:55 Men Need Self Mastery
00:30:08 Are you TRUSTWORTHY?
00:35:05 Expectations vs REALITY
00:47:26 Women dating multiple men
00:53:09 SEX in a RELATIONSHIP
00:59:43 Be willing to work on it
01:09:43 the DARKSIDE of casual sex
01:16:13 JOIN CHANNEL MEMBERSHIP

Пікірлер: 815

@HardlyInitiated Ай бұрын

👉 Dating Cards: www.hardlyinitiated.com/products/dating-deck

@shayrobin145 Жыл бұрын

Theses are the type of Black women that need to be represented on these podcasts. Not the young naïve immature ones😒

@brandonpeacenlove4375 Жыл бұрын

These are mature older wise women ...these aren't the mindset of normal everyday women especially from 20-38

@fitz2523 11 ай бұрын

@@brandonpeacenlove4375 actually it is…like she said in the beginning it is hard for women to date multiple men at once and they desire relationship/commitment. Like mentioned earlier Most agree to these casual dating terms because they think they can change men especially after sex. they may have yet develop language for it like these women have but they are fed up of being played like their moms and grandmothers…today’s women have also been traumatized sexually/emotionally/mentally and physically and willing to get even to save face. Especially if children are involved. I disagree with the casual dating approach/narrative and these broken homes being created from toxic relationships

@Tee-Star 6 ай бұрын

Or the Mammies.😊

@Realness4sho 5 ай бұрын

💯💯💯✅

@Thats_Sew_Shy Ай бұрын

And not the angry or bitter ones either

@dpharrison7 Жыл бұрын

Ladies please listen to Ryan, don't date guys like him. Listen when they say they don't want a relationship with you. Don't try to change his red flags to green ones.

@kayReneeEL Жыл бұрын

That’s what my dump ass going through now....🤦🏾‍♀️ I could not blame the man I was involved with if I wan too. Its my fault, my responsibility and my accountability.

@Drjanmo Жыл бұрын

@@kayReneeELdon’t be so hard on yourself. Give yourself grace.

@jamaica2010ism Жыл бұрын

Girl, sometimes the decisions we make when we lack awareness leads us in the light for the rest of our lives. Ease on out of there and start over fresh with a new mind, new intentions and new you. Unfortunately we learn alot of things late in life. It aint over until ymwe stop breathing so nothing wrong with trying again.

@dpharrison7 Жыл бұрын

@kymmhsn he has some responsibility too as the host stated, great job seeing your part in it, and like the other ladies said extend yourself some grace, learn from this experience, and grow through it. Everything we grow through makes us stronger.

@frankalleniv7195 11 ай бұрын

Naw you said it right the first time. Her accountability, which brings me to my next point. I see majority of the women give the guy who doesn’t want a relationship many chances but to the guy who wants them, y’all skip over those guys smh. That doesn’t make no damn sense smh.

@phozisanciya729 10 ай бұрын

Ryan is a perfect example of the contaminated men we meet out here. Men who feel validated for their "honesty" yet not taking accountability for their toxic role in the cycle. Women need to learn from this and run away immediately when they detect these red flags. Take care of your hearts ladies cause this is disrespectful behavior.

@jenilovesoldschool 9 ай бұрын

Perfectly said

@hamaru6 5 ай бұрын

🤣

@Pheonix1111 Жыл бұрын

If you are a man who does not want to have a serious long-term relationship known as a monogamous marriage, but you want to have sex, then go have sex with a prostitute. Pay a prostitute for sex and leave other women alone. Stop traumatizing and hurting women by having casual sex relationships, friends with benefits relationships, situationships, etc.

@Courie11e Жыл бұрын

Say it louder 🎉🎉🎉

@JessicaLeeAnnWrites 11 ай бұрын

Like this makes SO much sense can’t believe men don’t understand this

@Shanice___Loves 11 ай бұрын

No women need to keep their legs closed. It's the empowerment BS that got women thinking they can have causal sex.

@genovasquez8361 11 ай бұрын

Personally i like free sex. So i will simply meet new women every month and have friendships with women who give me sex. conversation and sex and netflix and chill is what i want. im not paying or spending money to get sex. Its simply not worth it. We as men gonna do what we wanna do to get sex for free. Sorry but not sorry.

@genovasquez8361 11 ай бұрын

@@JessicaLeeAnnWriteswhy pay for SEX, when we can free sex with multiple women? Which one is more beneficial to us?

@laquintaf.574 11 ай бұрын

How is Ryan mad at the fact that the young lady that he wants to "casually date" is possibly casually dating other people. I'm confused. You told her you don't want her, so is she to stop dating other people because you only want her casually dating you? This is funny as hell. This really makes me happy that I'm celibate. I can't with males who want their cake, chips, hotdogs, and ice cream🤣😂🤣.

@Trombonegoddess86 11 ай бұрын

Cake, chips, hot dogs, and ice cream?!?! I’m screaming! 😂😂😂 But I completely agree with you. I’m married and I tell my husband frequently he better not die on me because I can’t and will NOT go back out based on what I see is out there these days.

@laquintaf.574 11 ай бұрын

@@Trombonegoddess86 "he better not die🤣." It is rough out here in these streets.

@rtmclean2763 11 ай бұрын

Something for nothing....😅

@jenilovesoldschool 9 ай бұрын

😂😂😂😂😂... make it make sense

@Erica-cf1xb 7 ай бұрын

Poly kangz cannot accept poly Qwanes. Their preferred option is into that same lifestyle that's why Issa match. Both cosplaying. Both need to just make that trash ass relationship work.

@JCballin23 11 ай бұрын

The shift in energy was so funny when Dr. Nicole started talking. They were so embarrassed. This is why they can play little girls and not grown mature healed women.

@eva09771 5 ай бұрын

You have that right!

@drea0795 10 ай бұрын

🤦🏾‍♀️ Our men are so confused 😖. “ “I want an emotionally healthy, quality woman (which I know means she will NATURALLY form an attachment to me, especially after sexual intimacy), but I don’t want her to attach to me. I want to enjoy all the benefits of her being healthy/not traumatized while simultaneously traumatizing her through my selfish actions because I don’t like/want the type of women that she likely inevitably become as a result of her experience with me.” Like are y’all hearing yourselves??? 🤔 And these are the “high value men” we have to choose from. So avoid the thugs, the broke/lacking ambition men, the “jerks”, etc…, only to end up with a “high value man” who wants to use your body while engaging in a pretend relationship that will end up nowhere. But y’all tell us to choose better….smh. Where is better???

@andreea1352 10 ай бұрын

That’s the best comment ever 🎉 amazing love it so good 😊

@Adoseof_Ri 8 ай бұрын

!!!

@DanielJamall 8 ай бұрын

Or just give your body to your husband 🤷‍♀️

@drea0795 8 ай бұрын

@@DanielJamall right…cuz it’s just that easy, huh? That’s why there’s millions upon millions of virgins all over the place, including you, right? I’m sure you absolutely, DEFINITELY didn’t stick your penis in ANY orifice ever, right?? If you’re a woman, you’ve never ever been penetrated in any way, shape, or form, right? People stay telling others what they ought to do and can’t even halfway do it themselves…smh. 🙄 Good try, but the way human nature is set up, it’s not that easy or just about everyone would being doing just that. Let’s be forreal.

@icycici6191 8 ай бұрын

@@DanielJamall You can't even get to the husband part because you gotta date first..... only to find out after the 3rd or 4th date they are "emotionally unavailable."

@quathetruth8314 11 ай бұрын

A wise man once said “as soon as you catch feelings, get clarity” from God and that person you caught them feelings for. STOP and get clarity don’t continue to date or invest time but stop pause slow down and get clarity! Amen

@veronicahannah2438 3 ай бұрын

Love this. The best advice. It’s a simple ask. God remove them if they are not for me. And wait and watch. He will confirm it also. Love love love this advice.

@Purplestix193 Жыл бұрын

Dr Nicole dropped gems. I can tell that some things she said were hard for the male hosts to swallow, especially when she mentioned self mastery and even exposed the hypocrisy in men wanting something from women that they themselves are not ready to give or reciprocate, and how that hypocrisy also exposes a lack of integrity + discipline…which can be emasculating and dishonorable in the eyes of a healthy woman. From other episodes on this pod-I can tell that they, or at least Ryan, has many beliefs that are rooted in misogyny. I dont think he is a misogynist, but I hope they both begin to question the root of their beliefs/desires more. If we all abstained until marriage, we would not be in this mess. God’s word is true and simple-but we are in confusion. Great episode guys!

@nenajay3174 Жыл бұрын

!!!!!!

@angeg100 Жыл бұрын

It's so obvious that these two guys are "players" they seem to disrespect women, but expects women to respect them. They seem to leave all the responsibilities on women. Just because you say you don't want a committed relationship doesn't mean that is not what the woman wants. If you don't want a committed relationship stop having sex casually. Immature guys talking about mature subjects. Their laughter speaks volumes.

@Purplestix193 Жыл бұрын

@@angeg100 I like to see them seeking knowledge and initiating much needed conversation. You can tell, like with many men, they want to have their cake and eat it too, with no sexual discipline. Women will not continue to date with their hearts while men date with their d***s. And they wonder why we have city-girl culture today.

@amiciaramsey8000 Жыл бұрын

This comment is coated in truth.

@emac1286 Жыл бұрын

Speak for yourself about not thinking he's a misogynist. You may THINK he's not, but If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, it's a duck!

@JessOhio2013 Жыл бұрын

Ryan, the last few guests and the ones tonight have alluded to you having work to do. Go on ahead and get your therapist and mentors and do the work my brother.

@teresadavis528 11 ай бұрын

Dated this guy for 3 years, we were both 20 years old. After 3 years, I ended because he wasn't ready. I moved on. Fast forward 30 years later, he reached out to me to reconnect. He said he still loved me but realized he wasn't ready at that time. It ended again after 5 months this time, he ended it saying he wasn't ready that he was emotionally unavailable and that he wasn't happy with himself. From there, I deleted his number and blocked him from all communications and moved on. A year later, I found out from his father that he was still asking about me and couldn't understand why I won't take his calls and emails. Like dude you said you wasn't ready, like I'm supposed to waste my time waiting for him to get it together. I would think at 56 years old he should've had it together by now.

@rorospencer1259 11 ай бұрын

Soo sad and this is going to be the case for a lot of these men...

@123gollc9 11 ай бұрын

This is why they date down. The waste a younger girls time that doesn’t realize he doesn’t have it and never will. Sad to see them go from woman to woman with no froth or change in between! You are right this will be the case for a lot of them

@danamonet77 8 ай бұрын

Waymen ✋🏽they still do this at 56?!??? I’m 46 and ready to date, 56 is in my desired age range 🙄

@Erica-cf1xb 7 ай бұрын

He shelved you. Humans do that when they have a fear of what's truly outside.

@TegaMaidoh-xh9km 3 ай бұрын

that's just insane. when is he going to be ready, at 70?!

@nzingahoney Жыл бұрын

If you don't want emotional attachment, stay celibate. Sex can never remain casual, it brings both life and disease (possible death) into the world. Women are not the problem because they don't want to stay emotionally detached. It is telling that men like Ryan don't actually want those who do stay detached. You cannot get something for nothing and a woman's open emotional connection is what makes her pleasant and turned on to a man. Such men want to have their cake (the results of emotional connection) and eat it (no emotional connection cultivated) too. No such thing exists sir. Stop fooling yoirselves.

@mspeachie268 Жыл бұрын

Facts

@jamesmorell1758 Жыл бұрын

That sounds really simple in theory but in reality, people, both men and women just wanna screw sometimes. A lot of times women just wanna get a nut off. A lot of times they just wanna get pounded without having to hear about your day or problems. Just like men. A lot of times people in relationships wanna get off and then go there separate ways to do an activity independently without making the other feel used. I been there and heard it all. Making sex have to come at a consequence is detrimental to everyone involved. That's just what it is though. Why should my sexual pleasure. The desire for it bred into my DNA, have to mean taking on a woman's problems, which often times makes the sex not worth the headache. And vice versa, why should she have to worry about being all this other stuff to me just because I piped her down?

@ninadrake2167 11 ай бұрын

100% Facts!

@dmac5808 11 ай бұрын

Unfortunately, no one had the nerve to say it, but I will. Most women go after men they don't qualify for. High percentage of men will sleep with 6 and below with zero intentions of developing a real relationship. Women should date their sexual market value level.

@Shanice___Loves 11 ай бұрын

Women should stop having sex until her needs are met. I don't get why women keep having sex casually, you're ruining the dating scene for yourselves. Men want sex and if you just hand it out like water women lose.

@lmoody2825 11 ай бұрын

Its ironic that both of these grown men don't want to be in a serious relationship or give emotional support but want the benefits of a serious relationship 🤔

@mcchickenmuhchicken 11 ай бұрын

They are weak

@Erica-cf1xb 7 ай бұрын

That's on code for what the prostitutes want. He is daddy for the serpents. Of course they don't like to be called that.

@christieann1259 5 ай бұрын

Selfish

@tealea6907 11 ай бұрын

Her phone call with the other man was not inappropriate. Ryan just couldn't handle the fact that she didn't let Ryan put her on hold about that conversation/issue she was trying to have. It ain't no fun when the rabbit got the gun.

@lf3554 11 ай бұрын

Right! That was funny to watch!

@deebow8927 10 ай бұрын

Exactly! His ego was hurt.

@jenilovesoldschool 9 ай бұрын

@@deebow8927facts.

@kenwestbrook2587 Жыл бұрын

"Feelings are NOT facts and disrespect is a surface level emotion." 💯 🔥

@dorothymatthews6690 10 ай бұрын

You want a casual relationship, dating around and sleeping with different people, but having sex with a person you are not married to is not casual, its spiritual because you are becoming one with that person. This thing is deeper than you think. I hope these young men really get it. These two women are brilliant!

@CamilleSowell 8 ай бұрын

They get it but still dogs

@jodezod 7 ай бұрын

Facts and that never ends well. The reason people think it’s right is because cause sex feels amazing and because people tend to get bored and make excuses to justify why they should be able to go have sex with the next person.

@desimo9127 Жыл бұрын

Ryan's definition of a Healthy woman is not Healthy. He's explaining a passive, low standard, traumatized, and manipulative woman.

@Whisperwarrior Жыл бұрын

Yeah he made it clear he likes them young and for this reason 😂 no grown woman allowing casual nothing ! We don’t have time for that

@genovasquez8361 11 ай бұрын

@@Whisperwarriorim having a casual sexual relationships with a 50 year old woman who dont want marriage. So age is just a number.

@jdfodio 11 ай бұрын

@@genovasquez8361 "Age is just a number." You got that right: age is NOT maturity. She said "grown." No GROWN woman is allowing casual. What you have is a childish female who matches you.

@genovasquez8361 11 ай бұрын

@@jdfodio you right because I am 46 years old black man. I prefer a woman under the age of 25 for a commitment Older makes a good sex partner only

@SR77736 Ай бұрын

@@genovasquez8361 older men are only good for money. That's it.

@nikkihunter137 Жыл бұрын

I don’t want my trauma making decisions for me…💯💯💯

@shelbymw6429 Жыл бұрын

💯

@venitajackson1274 Жыл бұрын

This show was so good that I am rewatching it again. Professionals. No bad language. Just intelligence. WOW.

@ARareGEM2890 Жыл бұрын

.. Yes I am thanks🤳

@cassandrawhite1886 Жыл бұрын

Same, I have to rewatch

@hellointeresting1 Жыл бұрын

Tooooo good right........not just gems -- like the entire diamond mine!!!

@rorospencer1259 11 ай бұрын

I keep rewatching it.. learned soo much from this podcast

@ninadrake2167 11 ай бұрын

These dudes need too be alone until their both ready for the accountability of a relationship! 🤷🏾‍♀️

@rejectionisprotection4448 11 ай бұрын

Not when there's plenty of casual sex to be had.

@MsLady-gb3gy 10 ай бұрын

So true ❤ Facts ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

@Love-vi1ki Жыл бұрын

The light skin brother has alot of unresolved situations in his life that he needs to deal with before he makes a commitment with anyone. The only dating he should be doing is with therapist. He needs help like 5 years ago. All due to respect of your potential manhood talk to a professional ✌🏾💜🙏🏾

@THEREALSOURCE Ай бұрын

Exactly !!💯

@faith7934 11 ай бұрын

Inconsistent is not a mixed signal It's a signal I don't want

@busidlamini5038 11 ай бұрын

I like the fact that Ryan is getting therapy by default, talking is good for the soul♥️🙌

@thelifeofmaryd.2494 Жыл бұрын

The reason why you keep running into women asking about the status of your relationship and wanting more is because you're asking her to go against her nature. Sleeping with women for fun and offering nothing of equal value in return. So you're asking to purchase their body separately from their heart. While their mind makes sense of the transaction their heart doesn't. She's supposed to want to give all and nurture the man that she would give her body and heart to. Anytime you pour out in a relationship its your partners job is to fill it back up. Her expectations of you match what she gave. It's not the same as asking her to cook you a plate or borrow $10 for gas. That's comes from a different place. You're asking from something from her sacred place, and giving her a pat on the back in return.

@thelifeofmaryd.2494 Жыл бұрын

What you're REALLY asking Dr. Nicole is, "how do I get the goods for free" while creating damaged women. Who cares if women who can't attach is unhealthy? What really counts is if the sex is good right? Better that, than leaving a trail of traumatized women for fun. It doesn't make a gentleman because you do it with a smile.

@jamesmorell1758 Жыл бұрын

Help me with this. If a woman's nature is to "give it all away " to one dude, then how is it also a man's nature to wanna have sex with everyone and everything? It would appear as if biology or some other force inherently pits our interests against each other. If she gets her away, the man is dissatisfied at either having to wait, having to rely on her for sex, not getting enough, feeling like she controls it, isn't getting his desires met by having variety (none of these negatives have to be the case), and if the man gets his way, the woman will likely be on the hook indefinitely, "hurt and traumatized" because the man didn't wanna commit. It doesn't make sense. Even though I agree with the point that it's not that men don't wanna commit, they just don't see any inherent value in it because men are treated by society and biology as work horses.

@amaragrace94 11 ай бұрын

@@jamesmorell1758 The word of God tells us that when Adam and Eve disobeyed and listened to the devil instead, part of our (all of mankind) punishment is that a woman's desire shall be contrary to that of her husband (ESV Genesis 3: 16). We see that alot with the emotional disconnect and mismatched libidos. It's in our nature unfortunately. Not our fault, but we have to actively fight against our nature (by seeking the Lord, recognizing and healing childhood wounds, unlearning bad habits, learning self control, learn effective communication, etc) to get anywhere healthy. Relationships take work, but it starts at self work.

@Erica-cf1xb 7 ай бұрын

@@jamesmorell1758 society is failing and it doesn't appreciate those who actually contribute to healing it. If you exercise the options you are part of the problem. Nobody see it like that.

@daichelbutler Жыл бұрын

You guys needed this. A whole therapy session for yall. You don't need sex... you need healing bro! Dig deep & work on yourself

@teresamarie7460 11 ай бұрын

It's not complicated. IF anybody tells you they aren't emotionally available, they CANNOT require anything from you. You are simply preoccupying your time with a stranger. AND to trust a stranger is an oxymoron. A stranger becomes a friend when there is a consistent shared vulnerability, dependability, and empathy.

@MariahSincere Жыл бұрын

Ryan is terrible. “You don’t really want those” baby it’s hard to look I that dirty mirror ain’t it. These ladies are right go find you a woman like you

@HappyHealthyHair 11 ай бұрын

Yall should change the name of this episode to THE DOUBLE STANDARD 😂

@Lonelyeco Жыл бұрын

Casually dating but expecting the benefits and loyalty of serious dating. WOW! Kinda entitled there. You didn't want to talk, she had something serious on her mind. Her friend was there, you weren't.🤷🏾‍♀️

@datingdiaries1681 Жыл бұрын

If you dont want to be exlcusive you dont get to dictate who they are friends with. Sorry it doesnt work thet way.

@blaquepearlent6015 11 ай бұрын

Hey men: women dating doesn’t mean casual sex

@Erica-cf1xb 7 ай бұрын

To most it does that's why they put on the front, buy the gifts, show the expensive lifestyle for those sugar babies who gonna open it up raw for daddy day 1. It's part of idiot interview process.

@Trombonegoddess86 11 ай бұрын

Ryan, she didn’t do anything wrong. You couldn’t talk at the time, so she called a friend. It doesn’t matter whether it was platonic or not. Y’all were causal, so she was acting causal. Even if that’s the case that she has multiple guys on call like that, who cares? She wasn’t your girlfriend. Y’all were causal. It’s not your territory. You have to keep that same energy.

@rejectionisprotection4448 11 ай бұрын

But that's it; they don't want to keep that same energy. They want to spread it around, but keep the faithful gf (doing all of the emotional and domestic labour and going 50/50 no doubt) at home.

@Trombonegoddess86 11 ай бұрын

@@rejectionisprotection4448 oh, I agree. That seems super apparent from what I’ve seen. Thankfully in a recent video, Ryan expressed that he can’t keep hearing this solid advice, yet continuing with his causal ways. I really hope he’ll go that route. But in this episode, yes, it is very apparent they don’t want to keep that same energy yet want all these perks of a girlfriend and/or wife package. Just like Ryan and Tysean have membership levels for their YT channel, that’s how it is in relationships. They’re like a KZfaq member who isn’t even subscribed to the channel, yet demanding top level membership privileges.

@christieann1259 5 ай бұрын

@@Trombonegoddess86🤣🤣🤣😂😂😢😢😢

@AmajeOfficial 10 ай бұрын

Who he described as as a Dangerously focused man is Russell Wilson to the T! No wonder men hate on him because of his discipline and focus and execution!

@tristamarie7115 Жыл бұрын

Speaking of discipline, there seems to be a lot of men who are strong/successful in their businesses/careers, but not at home.

@nenajay3174 Жыл бұрын

I’ve always dated with intention. I always assume those at a certain age (grown) who have a pattern of prolonged casual dating with no intention of getting serious are one of the following: 1-hurt and unhealed aka scared 2-busy with specific goals 3-fresh out of a long relationship and need time 4-undisciplined and selfish 5-not truly interested in the gender they are dating/using them as a mask

@ARareGEM2890 Жыл бұрын

..And I can totally agree 👍

@tissaspeight3212 Жыл бұрын

I know this is a trendy term, but #4 can include (narcissist).

@ARareGEM2890 Жыл бұрын

@@tissaspeight3212 Great point of your observations my dear.

@jenilovesoldschool 9 ай бұрын

In which case, none of them should be in the dating pool.

@Jen00051 Жыл бұрын

It’s something when you don’t establish a committed relationship and the woman distance herself. I’ve seen plenty men all in their feelings and can’t handle it when the woman starts seeing someone else. Men are not use to being the one dismissed. I told someone, I can’t kick it with you anymore and he lost it emotionally.

@SR77736 Ай бұрын

Men can't handle rejection and nor calling the relationship shots.

@maureenbichanga2418 Жыл бұрын

Such a beautiful and insightful interview. Older women teaching younger women how the game is played. Thank you Dr. Nicole and Crystal for the wise nuggets. The ladies speak proper, soft and gentle but yet firm. I loved that way Tysean and Ryan were held accountable. One of my favorite interviews hands down.

@TheAttymom 10 ай бұрын

Yes Sis this is one of the best interviews. The hypocrisy and double standards of these hosts makes me throw up in my mouth. However, it’s the honesty and transparency that women need to see and hear so we make realistic decisions in these dating streets.🙏🏾

@vickiburchfield5741 3 ай бұрын

I totally agree

@monettevalliere 11 ай бұрын

There is and there will never be anything healthy about casual sex. No matter how comfortable we get with it today. Nothing healthy about that.

@91WriterzStatus Жыл бұрын

I love Dr. Nicole! She's always holding people accountable and leading them to think deeper about their actions or intentions. She does this effortlessly beautifully. I miss her on "Put a Ring On It."

@nosindisomyeni 11 ай бұрын

She is so good

@mistymojones9280 Жыл бұрын

In order to heal I had to sit down with my inner child ask her to trust me, allowing me to lead because she is not leading us in the right direction... I became at peace with myself and I pick better in relationships.. The love of my life came into my life and the woman this man bring out it in me.... Amazing!!

@veronicawilliams1957 8 ай бұрын

Wow! I love this and I’m going to try this! Thank you for sharing! ❤

@Options23 11 ай бұрын

Ladies dont ENTERTAIN casual SEXUAL relationships. Think better of yourselves. Wait on GOD, love yourself First. Flee guys that want casual relationships and sex.

@Jen00051 Жыл бұрын

You hear how the men are saying to different things. If the woman doesn’t get bent out of shape, then she’s seeing someone else and it’s a problem. When the man is seeing someone else, then it’s she knew what it was. 2 of my older brothers and I were raised by my father. I seen men in action and already knew had the game was played. Men cannot handle the same situation. We are 52,53, and 54. I started seeing my oldest brother having young ladies flock to him. I watched him start to play young ladies in Junior High and when we were in high school. I told him you’re going to have daughters one day and he got quite, not expecting me to say that.

@1111ScorpQueen Жыл бұрын

Will y’all get R.C. Blake’s on the show..?:-)

@nenajay3174 Жыл бұрын

These ladies did an excellent job of breaking down what so many of us have been knowing and what so many have tried to express to Ryan and Tysean. I truly hope they received it and make the necessary adjustments.

@ARareGEM2890 Жыл бұрын

Exactly.

@monettevalliere 11 ай бұрын

Agreed

@rejectionisprotection4448 11 ай бұрын

They may or may never do it. They'll only adjust when there's a greater benefit to it than acting the way they are now. This may take some time.

@PerfectlyAshley Жыл бұрын

CALL RYAN OUT AUNTIES!!!! 🔥. #FINALLY 😂

@RConnelly 11 ай бұрын

Is Ryan trying to say that he is so “ great” that all his casual(ties) end up liking him so hard and won’t let go. 😂🤣😂🤣 Why is this so hard for me to imagine?!

@rejectionisprotection4448 11 ай бұрын

"His casual(ties)". That's just brilliant.👏👏👏👏👏👏👏

@chaleecesharpe 11 ай бұрын

I’m back watching this for the 2nd time. These women were dropping GEMS that you can’t get with just one watch 😮‍💨

@laquintaf.574 11 ай бұрын

This is crazy. I think this is why Ryan dates 20-22 year-old girls. A grown ass woman ain't going for the bs. I look at this in two ways. One, I commend a man who is straight up about his intentions. Two, I find it sickening to say what he's saying and he says it with no problem. Men need to realize that women are emotional creatures, and they need to stop playing on that fact. All I can say is, ladies take this as your proof that a guy can tell you they want something casual but take you out on dates and Netflix and chill...niggro that is boyfriend actions

@rejectionisprotection4448 11 ай бұрын

You might like to listen to Princella for a VERY different take.

@mimiprice6899 4 ай бұрын

Don’t listen to Princella ! Protect your ear gates in Jesus name!

@karinesavard2016 10 ай бұрын

Cheating is a sign of immaturity and insecurity, solve that first instead of making more victims for your own shortcomings.

@tallgrape_3626 Жыл бұрын

Life is too short to put your life on hold for someone who does not, and will never, want to commit. Disclaimer: We are also under no obligation to remain who we were 5 secs ago. 🙂

@thelifeofmaryd.2494 Жыл бұрын

You shouldn't be sleeping with anyone while dating. You dont even know them. Get to know as many folks as you want, then when you find someone that qualifies as a wife, then take them off the daing market. Its literally a MARKET. Some folks want to stand over a pumpkin keeping anyone else from seeing if it suits their needs but will never commit to buying it themselves. No one will tolerate you cutting it open in store, but you can find out enough info about it to know if you should buy it.

@Kenya_Ekiah 10 ай бұрын

Wow…to sit up and say you don’t want the woman, who in turn wants the same thing as you, i.e., no commitment, no attachments. It is perfectly fine to not desire that. However, you want to be emotionally irresponsible with a valuable woman, who is healthy enough to develop emotional attachment to you, then complain about her getting attached is the highest level of narcissism and selfishness, and a huge lack of maturity. Ladies, pay attention. We play a role in allowing ourselves to be victimized by this type of thinking. Focus on your life, understand who you are as a daughter to the Most High God, by reading what he says about you in his word. Then you won’t fall victim to men who think like this. Yes, I said victim. Great conversation though! Thank you for being honest and real with your responses, and realizing your nonsense, hopefully that’ll lead you to change. Amazing, and wise guest! 💯

@nenajay3174 Жыл бұрын

Tysean’s opening statement, “women are attracted to men that are attractive to other women”. I believe it’s true the other way around. I’ve even had a man tell me that he didn’t want a woman that other men didn’t look at. It’s all normal and understandable. The bottom line is that we all tend to want an attractive partner. It’s only unhealthy IF the “attractive” person is partaking in unhealthy behavior (lying, cheating, etc) Believe it or not there are attractive and cool people who believe in commitment/healthy romantic relationships. Women chasing men….I personally don’t care for it. Any man who enjoys being chased, for me, personally I don’t see them as alpha or manly. But to each his own.

@rejectionisprotection4448 11 ай бұрын

And some men actually choose a woman that other men AREN'T interested in. These guys don't want the competition.

@hillaryconsultingservices 11 ай бұрын

A man that I don’t think any woman can respect. Eventually she’ll disrespect him because she’s out of her femininity.

@cassandracassandra7352 11 ай бұрын

Amen !!!!! She opened up that BOX on y’all and turned on them LIGHTS 💡 🧠

@Moments83 10 ай бұрын

When a man likes/love you, they behave like us and want to engage with you all the time, the one who will claim he is busy with this or not, just know he is entertaining others on the other days… ladies leave such a man!!!

@smartmouthriveria Жыл бұрын

These women just shut down all the foolishness. I guess I'm uh sit my ass down.

@JessicaWhiteheadAKA Жыл бұрын

Dr. Nicole !!!!!!!! Non-biased, professional advice - so ready !!!!!!

@SanctifiedLady 10 ай бұрын

A women’s vagina is connected to their heart… a man having sex with a woman is like opening open heavens door 😂 you can’t open heavens doors and expect things not to grow… these feelings come without a woman being able to fully control it. It was not created to be a random act no matter what male or female intentions are… it’s literally meant to create life and a women psyche goes to that nurturing mode to nurture something and the relationship becomes her focus because that’s how babies are created Stop planted seeds you don’t want to grow, stop practicing having children and don’t plan to be with that person

@JashawnMurphy33 5 ай бұрын

Wow I like how you worded that.

@sandrapollard2541 10 ай бұрын

I love it.. I want my man to be aligned and designed for me❤

@talicialee 11 ай бұрын

So here’s the issue with casual dating. Men don’t know that they get fulfillment from women. Men find comfort, emotional support, vulnerability, etc in women. They want these things without having a commitment. It’s really just using someone. Because a woman is a woman, she definitely will want more than casual as time progresses. As a man it’s not healthy to continue to engage with a woman casually just because she allows it. Wrong is wrong.

@rejectionisprotection4448 11 ай бұрын

You should listen to Princella.

@Erica-cf1xb 7 ай бұрын

This is hell. It's right to do as much as possible than "settle down"...that actually is the perfect way to attract a bigger version of what you don't want...the same liar as you. Both on fire and come together to cool it down for the image awards.

@blaquepearlent6015 11 ай бұрын

Women heal faster…we jump back quicker…but the girl that hurt a guy in high school he will forever size everyone up with the past…until he does the work

@rejectionisprotection4448 11 ай бұрын

So true.

@rorospencer1259 11 ай бұрын

Very true

@carolinewn Жыл бұрын

This was a great conversation. But these 2 hosts are something else! Im glad the coach called them out at 24:30 mark

@Trombonegoddess86 11 ай бұрын

YESSS! I was all for it! She was like, “Let’s run that back and discuss it.”

@meganpittman0615 9 ай бұрын

This was an incredibly impactful interview. I have learned so much more about myself and what I want, and what I won’t tolerate. I respect the men for being so transparent and vulnerable about their life experiences for the rest of us to learn from them. As a 44yo woman I can not be physically vulnerable with a man who can’t be emotionally vulnerable. That prevents from situationship and one night stands.

@keshaskorner2883 10 ай бұрын

I love the vulnerability of Ryan in this episode and speaking within his truth. Now i hope he looks back at this segment and get counseling.

@launikarina_ Жыл бұрын

This was one of the best episodes I’ve caught thus far. The engagement from the men and the women remained respectful while accepting accountability and transparency. Definitely took notes.

@ARareGEM2890 Жыл бұрын

Exactly... Is were A LOT OF MEN STRUGGLE.. expressing feelings, healthy communications, attachments...

@JaneDoe-dp6rg 11 ай бұрын

I'm glad they finally have someone on here to tell them the real. These guys want to play games with women but don't want the women playing games with them. Relationships are too simple for people to be moving so complicated. If as a man you're not willing to settle down with women you are casually dating, please expect her to be moving in these streets just as you are as a casual dater.

@makaylahanson1373 10 ай бұрын

I feel like if they’re just casual why does it matter to him who she’s talking to in a private conversation

@adrianem3662 Жыл бұрын

This is an excellent conversation….I have shared this already. I am married now, but I remember telling a guy we can’t be friends or talk anymore. Ryan don’t fight it!✌🏽

@thirdworlduniversityllc9084 Жыл бұрын

❤❤❤❤❤❤ at it's highest frequency!

@blaquepearlent6015 11 ай бұрын

It’s impossible because casual sexing is not part of the original plan…that’s why it will never work…we will lie to ourselves.. but we know it’s a struggle

@roaming1996 10 ай бұрын

Dating and having casual sex are two totally different things

@skytodd_ 11 ай бұрын

Dang this mad me cry and realize, how much my own decisions lead me to being hurt.... and the work that need to continually be done.

@alchemicalsoul Жыл бұрын

An absolutely brilliant conversation. I'm focused on my soul ascension. I'm no longer catering to the human ego experience. I'm my authentic self at this point. I've learned as of last week to walk away from that which doesn't serve me, heal my wounds, and keep transcending the ego. Took me 2 years in this process to figure it out. Men will act out being a boyfriend with potential for a long term, but their dismissive avoidant behavior comes out over time. Men and women who can't connect are dysfunctional. I'm going to connect to myself for the remainder of this journey. If a real one comes along, I'll know better if they are authentic. Men and women need to do the work to address their unconscious shadow thoughts and behaviors.

@HSBsoulsurfer 8 ай бұрын

Love your comment! I am in the same place as you. I had to "give up", stop worrying, and let go of these outcomes. I had to give up on men. If an Old Soul, a Romantic comes along, then so be it. If we rise to an energetic level and vibration so high that we attract this person energetically, then great, if it happens one day. Sending peace, love, and blessings to you on your own Journey! 🙏💓

@Erica-cf1xb 7 ай бұрын

Well said!!! That's the hard work. Not for the faint of heart.

@ReneesHairweaving 11 ай бұрын

👏🏾Awesome conversation. Finally, a conversation that casually dating doesn’t take you off the hook on being responsible

@Dw3nG6K 11 ай бұрын

1:08:20 I love the way they are both so tactful and calm in explaining you that you have traumas to work through without being harsh and make you feel being attacked

@sensiblemindset423 11 ай бұрын

A lot of men want to date casually but they want monogamous women so they don’t have to share the woman although they want the woman to share them 🤦🏽‍♀️. Also , why date if you want to run through people? Having sex and engaging people inject ing yourself onto their journey has to come with care, accountability, responsibility it’s so immature to think about avoiding these things while dealing with someone else’s life, mental health and emotions.

@ninachanelle1214 Жыл бұрын

Respect and responsibility are like fraternal twins. Without one the other will not hang out for too long🤯🤯🤯

@blaquepearlent6015 11 ай бұрын

And don’t receive things you can’t and won’t reciprocate

@jenilovesoldschool 9 ай бұрын

This episode is so good. Ryan seems to be emotionally numb. I can guarantee when you start healing, you will see how damaging to you and the women, a casual relationship is. Also want to add, if people truly understand the spiritual implications of premarital sex, all of us would avoid it.

@shemhen Жыл бұрын

I’m watching this and I’m pondering the two young men that bring on all these powerful relationship experts: why are they still dating casually when the evidence shows that being in a healthy relationship is overall beneficial to men Brings me to the conclusion that they are just here for the $$$ not to change lives or behaviors.

@Luvurselffirst Жыл бұрын

I've wondered as well what the goal or motivation was to have a platform that discusses so much and gives o much insight etc. but as with anything, some get there in their own time. just like when one family member goes plant-based and the rest aren't having it, but eventually, they begin to make healthier choices.

@NyakzOTSD 11 ай бұрын

Because men are hardwire so differently

@nenajay3174 11 ай бұрын

@ZaddyOutside Maybe for SOME men. Clearly not all as there has been several men on this show alone that prove otherwise.

@rejectionisprotection4448 11 ай бұрын

@@LuvurselffirstWell it's helpful for the audience, even if the hosts are slower to catch on.

@monettevalliere 11 ай бұрын

Thank you ladies. "Whatever we pratice, we master."

@dswannbeautyartist 10 ай бұрын

Change the appetite “cultured in the self betrayal” she went deep! 🙌🏾

@nenajay3174 Жыл бұрын

I make things as simple as I can. I don’t assume anything. I ask and also pay attention. If the energy I receive shows little interest or is inconsistent, my level will match that in the beginning. If no changes are made soon, I automatically lose interest. I’ve never been one to have sex with multiple men but even if I am active with one man, that alone never keeps me interested. Looks, sex, money-none of that will suffice without love, attention and faithfulness.

@beautybycara6234 Жыл бұрын

This has been one of the BEST conversations!!!!! Thank you!!!!

@crystalkhalil4023 Жыл бұрын

Thank you!

@monettevalliere 11 ай бұрын

One of the best!

@Daamwright 11 ай бұрын

I humbly say this… Sounds like my brotha want prostitutes. For sex exchange with no attachments, prostitutes might be the solution. She gets her money you get her sex with no attachments. Great show(s)🙌🏿

@rejectionisprotection4448 11 ай бұрын

No, that won't be enough. He wants her emotional support and labour, not JUST her body. However, he doesn't want to admit that. Therefore prostitutes won't scratch THAT particular itch. Unless he wants "The Girlfriend Experience", but he'd have to pay too much for the Experience. He'd rather get it free.

@Erica-cf1xb 7 ай бұрын

AND the diseases. It lays dormant then pop out later once happier times come. Can't forget the past. Her past matters...so does his. It's gonna show up. Big karma spinning the block

@ladyofspa Жыл бұрын

Best show ever! More of this please... grow those 5 years olds selves to loving adults. That host is a wounded child. He lives in avoidance love style. I feel sorry for him. He's so broken. Prayers to him to find his highest truth.❤

@Dreamgirlair 11 ай бұрын

This episode was healing and refreshing in so many ways! I commend Ryan for being transparent in this moment and not wearing a mask. That takes an incredible amount of courage that most do not have! That same courage is allowing you to do your work. Keep going! May God bless you with an amazing family and a legacy that outlives you!

@jamaica2010ism Жыл бұрын

Good dudes don't treat women like that. I think he knows the women are going to be ok with it so he puts it out there so it wont be on him in the end. Glad the Dr held him accountable. Some men really dont understand the emotional nature of a real woman. Just pay for sex if that's all you want. We need more of these ladies. I will become a member if ladies like these are on more. Some things were hard for the hosts to hear. I wonder how other men are experiencing this? I may be assuming but these bom ladies are not married and that speaks volumes to me. We ladies out here worrying about getting a good man. We need to worry about getting our emotional and mental health in order, especially so that we can stop accommodating the romantic relationships we do.

@MsArtisticSoul 11 ай бұрын

I think we forget that developing appropriate emotional attachments in relationships is normal and healthy. The problem happens is when we try to fight against that natural human and healthy tendency.

@nosindisomyeni 11 ай бұрын

I can listen to these Doctors all day they dropped so many gems I had to listen to it again. I love how they made the host see the other side of casual dating and how it can be detrimental to you.

@carldowning3624 10 ай бұрын

Because men of a certain maturity know that women want more, I believe it's a cop-out when men say you know what this was upfront. Just don't date until you are ready.

@dorothymatthews6690 10 ай бұрын

You cant have it all Ryan. If you dont want a relationship but just wants sex, you have a lot of healing to do. Prostitutes gets paid for sex. God wants better for you! I thank you for being transparent because it will help a lot of men! This episode was brilliant and i just love how these women show so much grace!

@LoveLyriks Жыл бұрын

I love how most of the guests be low-key giving y'all therapy😂😂😂

@Cherokeecandie 9 ай бұрын

Whew. These Queens are preaching! This was so necessary. I’m a smart fixer for my brothers and in return my father spoiled me. I’m so confused now. lol

@angelalittrell7795 11 ай бұрын

Hands down one of the best shows of 2023 so far 🎉

@azuree_thehomegurl 11 ай бұрын

The Dynamic Duo (Crystal n Nicole) 🙌🏾 you ladies were On point 💪🏾had my guys silent lol Dope episode 🔥🔥🔥

@treshiahodge7546 Жыл бұрын

I just have to say I'm so proud of you guys!!!! I can see the growth in both of you. There is still work to be done, that's just human, but the fact that you're taking the journey is commendable. Thank you for this platform, for your vulnerability, and for your willingness to grow and do it so publicly. Thank you!❤

@HardlyInitiated 11 ай бұрын

We appreciate you!!

@jacquelinerosemylove6429 11 ай бұрын

I need to know all of this! I know none of us received a class called RELATIONSHIP 101 to figure out the dos and don’t s in relationships. I started out trusting a male my father. I believed the first male who took my virginity had no reason not to. Never knew he was just running game. I need help right now at 56 years old newly divorced after 34 years of marriage. It’s vicious out here. I have no desire for casual sex. I am good! It’s hard to find a male friend that’s SOLID! Nothing is the same anymore! No one want to commit to anything!

@drea0795 10 ай бұрын

Dr. Nichole is the TRUTH!!!! 🙌🏾🙏🏾 Thank God for her gift.

@drea0795 10 ай бұрын

If you really only just wanted sex, you would get it from those women who CAN detach due to being damaged from severe trauma, but you “don’t want those”. So it’s not about just wanting sex, yet not trying to hurt anyone; it’s about your inherent mistrust of women and your fear of being taken advantage of by them. So many of our men are walking around full of trauma and dysfunction, but label themselves as good guys or “high value men” just because they’re not outright mean or physically abusive to women. Meanwhile, their unaddressed trauma is perpetuating the cycle of trauma within the women in our community. Then once these women are now used up and re-traumatized, they say “we don’t want those”. 🤦🏾‍♀️ Lord help us….

@501Caution 11 ай бұрын

We have made dating Too Complicated! Theses content creators/ dating coaches lie to women but want men to be realistic! People get in where you fit in!

@GOODmusic843 9 ай бұрын

This was so good. I love the transparency, and how they held both men accountable in their own situations. I feel this was a needed conversation and I wish we would do away with casual dating. Either be intentional, or focus on self until you’re ready. Stop playing with people and their emotions. I pray Ryan starts to feel uncomfortable with how he moves in relationships so a level of growth can come forth. Praying for more healed men and women and relationships ❤

@Erica-cf1xb 7 ай бұрын

It's naturally happening. Those who are smart are staying out the matrix where the baddies running through everything giving out raw deals and several concurrent life sentences. It's a circus ran by monkeys.