So glad you mentioned Anthropomorphisation and us projecting our feelings onto them. They have a totally different way of feeling things and values! We can tell when they are content from observation, but it's not the same! Also the cuddles thing. We see so many people touch their birds in all sorts of places and cause hormonal behaviour and then wonder why it's happening! Also how we should encourage them to be brave and independent! Ours get training, time with us etc. But we always try to give them independent activities!

This is something everyone needs to hear MANY times when they want to get a bird...

I’m really glad you touched on how humans make animals dependent on them with us wanting them to need us. I see that a lot with dogs and birds too. And then people complain that they can’t leave the animal alone and it always wants attention.

Okay, to be honest I needed this... XD but I went to a pet store the other day and they had a Moluccan Cockatoo. But the saddest part was that they barely payed any attention to her health. You could see a big part of her foot had a cut on it and she could barely stand. What made it even sadder was that the people didn’t notice. Luckily I told them and they were able to get the foot better. And she got a great owner who had the time and used to own a cockatoos. 😅😁

This is the first time I’m hearing NOT to pet the beak... Thanks for the video, it’s exactly what I needed!!

I think one of the biggest things I've learned from this channel is to respect the birds wishes and learn its body language. My green cheek lets me know when he wants head scritches or cuddles and when he just wants to hang out.

I personally don’t own a bird but I binge watch your channel so much, and I learn a lot. I didn’t know birds were hormonal. My mind was blown. Thank you for educating us.

Quote of the day " Birds and Humans don't mate " 😀 Love this video, every bird owner or potential bird owner should know this.

We have worked hard to make our flock independent and confident! If they want scritches (in the appropriate paces!) then we wait for them to ask! People are so obsessed with getting a cuddly, talkative bird which is totally the wrong reasons of bringing them in to our lives!

It’s nice to see you talking more candidly about these issues instead of beating around the bush because people don’t want to hear that they’re putting themselves first, that they’re projecting their own needs and wants on the bird, and that they might be using the bird to fill a hole in their life that they need to deal with instead of putting the responsibility on their pet to make them feel better, because ultimately keeping animals properly takes work and commitment. I think a lot of people justify their own behavior for exactly that reason: they don’t want to admit that they’re not putting in the work that they should and that they’re not doing the best for their bird. They’d rather ignore the criticism and try not to think about what they might be doing wrong and focus on the bird’s behavior.

Oh my ...soo true for all animals. My dog also needs her freedom and people find her sweet looking but she does not like to get touched from people she does not know. And the people are always shocked like “why every dog should like to get cuddles ”🙈. Also people are very upset that the animal is insecure and then aggressive. But it is like you said the outcome of making them extremely dependent and defensive of the human. Love how honest you always talk about these topics always can reflect ... we all should reflect our own behavior... I always find something where I should take a step back 😂

Always good to remind those with the desire to cuddle, how to go about it in a healthy way.

I love your channel. I’m only just starting the process of getting a bird but wanted to do a lot of research beforehand. I am so glad that I saw this video - it’s so important.

The thumbnail was adorable!!

Love my birdies so much, they are becoming more and more cuddly as time goes. I feel so blessed to have these little balls of feathers in my life. They are 2 white capped pionus parrots

I have been waiting for this video ❤️

The cockatiel shows me affection with head tilts

This was so interesting and informative! I liked how you explained about how to much touching can trigger a hormonal reaction in your birds. I’ve learned from this video, basically, take it slow and calm with your bird. Absolutely learn to read THEIR body language. Also, don’t forget, when you are touching your bird, they can feel your energy. That’s why as bird parents, you have to remain calm, and happy, and in control. This was an awesome video!🥰🦜Thank you Jamieleigh, spot on as always!🦜💖NanaJ🦜💙

The title had me concerned, but I kept faith and watched it, and I'm glad I did! Great job as always. I constantly remind people that it's perfectly normal for a bird not to be cuddly, especially with very standoffish birds. And just because they don't want to cuddle or be pet, doesn't mean that they don't enjoy being with their owner. Both of my birds (bgm and sun conure) like to be touched, but it's usually brief and very much on their own terms. Sometimes it's a bit longer, but usually it's like, a few scritches for my sun and maybe 5 to 10 minutes for my bgm, depending on if he's having a big head molt or not. Mostly they just like being in my space and hanging out for their quality time. My bgm also likes really interactive conversations, mostly consisting of me repeating whatever word/sound he's making lol

This is so helpful! I was a little confused thinking it was odd for my bird not wanting to be petted . Now this tells me it’s simply not in their nature so it’s a good thing! Also thank you for the training to allow the bird to let us pet them! Very helpful!

Excellent video! People really need to hear this sooooo many people think all parrots are cuddly and it’s not the case!

FINALLY someone is saying this! I have been keeping and raising parrots for over 4 decades and I am so tired of seeing people ruin good birds with their own need to have a cuddly bird. Cockatoos suffer the most from this. These birds are often rehomed multiple times because the original owner finds that the neediness they have installed in their bird results in negative behaviors such as biting, plucking, and screaming. And then subsequent homes are not normally equipped to deal with helping to recondition a bird to overcome these behaviors. My own cockatoo came to me as a biting, screaming, feather chewing wreck that had no idea what a toy was. Yes, he wanted to cuddle for HOURS, and as soon as he was returned to his cage, the tantrums began. It was so bad that the woman I was supposed to get the bird from gave him to someone else and they were calling back within hours wanting to return the bird. Instead the woman had her bring the bird to me. The woman herself only had the bird less than a week. The bird was only about a year old at that time! It took months, but that bird is now better adjusted, learned how to play with toys and self entertain himself, and he rarely screams now. Where he used to pace up and down in his cage, how he keeps himself occupied with toys and his feather condition is improving. We are still working on the biting as he has decided that my husband is a rival for my attention...so he actively flies at my husband and tries to attack him. And he will bite me if my husband is anywhere within sight. This is what results when we impose our own needs on birds...they pay the price for it. I do give this bird affection, but in healthy amounts, and our handling sessions focus far more on encouraging the funny behaviors he likes to do (he likes to dance to music), and far less on cuddling. Thank you for bringing this important topic to light!

Wow, I didn't not most of this information and I just got 2 Amazon babies. Awesome video. It will help me and my birds a lot. Thank you !!!!!

You talk so much sense. With any animal, bird we have to let them be as independent as possible. Thank you very much. May you please take care and stay safe.

My sun conure is so sweet and cuddly. He is a quiet sun conure. Very content. He is 20 years old now. I have to admit I do pet and kiss him a lot, but he doesn't need me all the time. Best parrot ever

Excellent video! My sun conure tends to be all about the scritches, napping as smushed into my face as possible, and making sure my hair and eyebrows are all straightened out. But there are days he’s in a “no-touchy” mood. All about listening to him and letting him set the tone.

Excellent info in this video, thank you! I have two male budgies, only a month apart in age. The 1yr-old has recently started to accept a couple of seconds of head scratches in the evening when he's calm and settling in for the night. The 11-month-old is still terrified of my hand being near his head, but he doesn't fly away any more and instead just sidesteps; we're getting there! Both have them have come a long way with being comfortable around me and in our shared space, and I love seeing how much they change and gain confidence :)

OMg I’ve wanted this video for so long. Thank you so much jamieleigh! I love you 💕

Awesome info in reference to the link provided to Pamela Clark's blog. A must read for any bird owner new or old.

Our female Green Wing loves to sit on my lap every night when we watch a movie. Over all she is a very affectionate bird. We only scratch her head though. Enjoy your videos very much.

Wonderful link and informational blog. I don't even own a bird but I learned so much from it. This video and that blog should be in every pet store and given to each new bird owner. I know they'd appreciate the info or decide that a bird is not for them.

I need a comet in my life ❤️❤️🥰 loved the video, keep up the good work xx💕💕

Not having a lot of history with birds, I've been amazed how much some birds LOVE to cuddle! They are becoming the best pets. They aren't even mine! They belong to roommate. I took it on myself to work with them and spend time with them. I am worried about them taking to me more and won't like their real owner anymore, LOL. Uhg. I happen to really enjoy the birds a lot. The African Grey pukes on the roommate, so I know it loves her. It let's me feed it and is super gentle with me when I feed her. Otherwise, she is taking a lot of time letting me pet her. I'm aloud to pet her beak. LOL. As to this Cuddle issue??? Not sure about all you say. The one Macaw is 'special needs'. He has trouble with balance via misformed claw. But, I feel like he really needs the attention. He spends a lot of time tucked under my neck and ear. Very very sweet. I do only pet head and back of neck. LOL, on the beak. OH NO! They all like to get tiny pets on the beak. Not sure I see any hormonal behaviors though. SO, I'll try to be more aware. Subject it so difficult. Rescue states the bird should be handled 6-8 hours a day! So, WTF? Everyone has their opinions!

One of the best and most intelligent bird behavior videos I’ve ever seen. Thank you.

Me watching this video: yes, mmh, exactly! Some one tell my friend who says my Budgie hates them because she can’t pet him! He doesn’t hate you he just don’t be a cuddle birb

I'm planning on get a Plum Headed and I heard that because they don't preen their mates, they don't understand touch as "being cuddly". I have had only pet rats and I'm trying to get on the right mindset before meeting this cutie, because I don't want to talk on the wrong language with him. Thanks for the video!

Well said, some people might not LIKE what you have said, but that doesn't make it untrue

I’ve made plans to go visit a parrot sanctuary so I can learn more about birds, but the only thing that’s holding me back is Winter Storm Uri. I hope I can go soon! I’m determined to own a bird one day once I learn all I possibly can and put it into practice properly with birds that I do not own (I.e. while learning at a parrot sanctuary). Thank you BirdTricks for also being a great source for lessons and advice on how to care for and train birds.

Thank you. Great and helpful. My green cheek conure loves my younger daughter and I think she also did some “damage “ by patting him incorrectly. He allows me to scratch his head and around the eyes but in his terms. Love your channel. Learned a lot.

I really enjoyed this I have a orange head caique cooper she has been laying a brood since 2017,she is 8 or 9, I bought her at 6 months and we have a good great relationship.i think I’ve made her become very dependent on me , I’ve pet her all the ways you said not to but not 30 minutes lengths, she is currently sitting on 3 eggs, I take her from her nighttime cage ( where she laid them) breakfast snack lunch snack dinner snack giving her some away time from sitting . She sits for about 28 days then realizes nothing is going to happen and goes back to the 2 year ....on a sugar high... theirs way to much more to this story but thank you for this video.. very helpful and insightful.. your quite right about our needs human needs as I was becoming an empty nester and cooper filled the void as another child. I have a very hard time just leaving her sit in her cage all day , so I took her out quite a bit.

Amazing video, thank you for the truths behind petting a bird! I only scritch my birds if they ask me for it, I pet their heads, cheeks and necks only.

I try and make sure my bird is tolerant with other people, and animals, especially since Ringnecks are viewed typically jealous and Aggressive. So I aim for the tolerance of touch anyway. He typically hates pats at the moment, but he still wants attention from me as in talking to me, and he now happily steps up on my hand. I will try these techniques later down the line.

This was so interesting! I've seen so many videos online of really cuddly birds and had no idea of the implications of it! Definitely a base piece of knowledge for owning a bird!

My budgie,” Richie” hates to be peted... But he is still cute! Also, I dont really force him for me to pet him, BUT HIS SINGING IS AMAZING!

🥰 I love Comet! ☄️ 🦜

Thank you for making this video. Sounds like I gotta backtrack a bit to make more progress with my cockatiels accepting this behavior, they are comfortable to some degree with me, like I can 'boop' their head with my finger (and can hold it there sometimes for a Mississippi), but they would not tolerate me hovering my hand over their head. Gosh I wish it came more easily to my birds though. My previous cockatiel was a massive cuddlebug, but he was also the clingy kind. My current two tiels are much more independent, but I sure do miss giving them scritches like I did with the previous bird I adored. We had a consult a while back and I tried to capture them asking for scritches but it honestly got no where, instead it just got my two birds to ask for scritches from eachother more. Oh well looks like I gotta work harder!

It's a riot that you said birds don't like having THEIR space intruded upon. I can't tell you how many times Jewel the cockatiel will fly to my shoulder. She loves being with me and she'll explore a room as long as I am there, but she will go to my shoulder whenever she wants, even if I am cleaning up her mess. She jumps on me any time she wants.

Thank you!

Always such good knowledge and advice

Amazing! What a good boy! I like your tactic and he look like after the 1st one stroke rub that he was all inn! Love it

Love your videos, I’ve learned SO many things on this channel. Would love to see some cockatiel videos !

This really makes me think about ancient history and stone carvings how birds were worshipped back thousands of years ago. Very fascinating.

Part of the reason I chose an African grey as a companion is that they tend to be less needy and clingy than other species. Now, can you make a video , ‘how to stop your bird snatching your glasses off 50 times per day’ He is OBSESSED with them 👓🤣

Excellent points. Thank you for opening my eyes on this entire subject!!

Excellent topic and the oh so true, this needed to be explained, and you of course did a great job, i try to explain this to my boyfriend, he needs to watch this, my conure really doesn't even like head scritches, he does like it for perhaps one second, also soo right about them letting them being checked out, like his feet and he on cue will my hand he does roll over, but that's a trick, sometimes he leans against my neck, (wing closed?of course) he does that if he chooses , so soft!! He also when molting does let me pet his head. Best info ever, thanx so much!👍🎉btw he on cue wiĺl lay on my hand and trust me with that!!! He's target trained/ clicker , indoor flight trained, still work with his indoor flying everyday, another btw, i target/clicker train for about 3 minutes each day, he looks forward to training, cuz he'll go to the perch or chair and stand there til he gets some kind of trick training, I did learn everything from you and dave, so thanx again! My bird does come to me on cue, so far so really good!!

My first budgie, Babi, was VERY affectionate - see, e.g., "Budgie Li'l Babi Kisses on Cue" - but I also taught him to be VERY independent - see "Self-Entertained Budgie Li'l Babi". Subsequent budgies have not really liked to be touched, so I respect that. Currently I have 5 rescue budgies and 3 of them are OK with kissing me on the cheek. I also had a green-singing finch that "tolerated" kissing (see "Kissing Tamed Serinus Mozambicus"). This bird, by the way, is the only finch on You Tube to perform a pseudo-formal recall exercise (see "Have Treat, Will Travel").

Thank you.

I was avoiding this video cause I didn’t think I would like it but boy was I wrong. Spot on. Love it!

Love to hear your truth-telling. Thank you.

My bird is a green cheek conure and I did obtain her from a breeder. She is super friendly always curious and flying to people's heads, which is what we're working on stopping, and she's always begging for scratches, pets, or just being on me. Truely a velcro bird lol. I love her but wish she had some independence which is being worked on.

Thank you sooo much for this video. My Quaker definitely loves to be with me but does not like to be touched. I didn’t know about touching his beak. He lets me rub it even though I don’t do it often but I won’t be doing that anymore. I’ve never owned a bird and he was sort of a rescue since he doesn’t like his owner. Your videos have helped me greatly. Thank you sooo much.

100% true!! 👌🏼 I’m so glad I watched this as I’ll be picking up 2 cockatiel babies when they are weaned in the next week... so this has explained everything perfectly 😊

The first time i met Ko Ko, (umbrella cockatoo) he came up to me, and rolled over onto his back and into my arms. He is very cuddly.

Thank you for this video. The information was really helpful in identifying some of the issues that we are experiencing!

My parrot loves being close to me, tolerates head scratching, and allows me to pick him up if needed. His preference is talking and playing without cuddles.

The pandemic has really hurt us as far as socializing our cockatiel. My husband is the one who strokes his back. I stick to the head and neck, How ever, Rascal has done tail rubbing on me. As I have been told, when he starts this behavior, he goes back to his station or palace. He is good, and now fully flighted, but not fully trained. Much love to you all, Maren

Yes, this is be talked about frequently, so people don't forget.

you gave me alot of help with the training tips.thank you so much, i have 2 cockatiels that hate something called physical touch😂but this vid will help alot

My bird is a little bit cuddly, she likes to be very close to me (always wants shoulders) and lately she’s been asking for pets and very receptive, but this is definitely a newer behavior 😅 she’s wanted to be in my space since the day I met her though! ❤

thank you so much for including captions on your videos!

Great training ideas. Our first bird was a Dusky Lory. Ya probably not a great choice for a first bird. The previous owners for whatever reason had to give it up. CoCo loved to be touched, played with, would roll over on his back for tummy rubs. Currently we have a 24 year old yellow nape Amazon named Ollie. We purchased the bird as a baby, so I finished the hand feeding process. Ollie will tolerate my touching to a point, then he lets me know when it's enough. My daughter is the only other person in the family that can even get close. I'll give these ideas a try and see how that works. Thanks

Love this channel😌

My budgie, Hugo, and I are playing a new game. When he perches on my finger, once in a while we have a mini battle between my fingernail and his beak. He made it up. It's cute. Seems affectionate. No biting. Just like swords clashing a few strikes. It usually lasts a few seconds and I stop when he shows me his tongue. I think he was inspired by having his beak cleaned off with a tootbrush a few times when fruit and chia seeds were caked on there. He made tiny quacking sounds like when he gets a shower (still working on water play, not his thing). He is more comfortable with my face really close to him now when he is on my shoulder so I do kisses. He makes the noises back. He seems to be enjoying some light finger rustles on the head area, but I don't push that. Thoughts?

i agree

So important, thank you for this, wouldn't it be awesome if the parrot sellers would offer a course & a behavior video for the new owners. I remember when I first saw a large parrot as a pet in a extended family member's home. I was instructed not to interact but the bird really wanted to be with me, I was told this "parrots mate for life so when you get a parrot it picks you as it's mate and will not befriend others". Even though I was a kid I thought of this as really gross and who would want a pet like that! As you so clearly noted & discussed here although they cared for the bird & kept it well & happy they actually set up a very cruel and weird relationship causing the bird to be so needy for them, although I think that bird secretly was saying "save me" when it attempted to be friendly towards me. Thank you for all your helpful advice.

You are a genius savant. ❤️❤️❤️❤️

great advice as always, thanks for the video

Even the most daring people and creatures enjoy physical contact affection and cuddles, especially at the beginning or end of the day, with flock/pride/herd fellows. Having calm cuddle soothing grooming time limited to these times can have health and wellbeing benefits too, and help transition to quality sleep and trust. Keep in mind this is to be relaxing and caring like going for a therapist massage or soothing a child or friend rather than for the lover in your life.

Love you

This neediness behavior may be cute to some bird owners but something I point out is how this sets them up to have a hard time if they ever have to be rehomed. Which was the case with a rescued Quaker we got. This Quaker was extremely needy to the point where he wouldn’t play with toys, he wouldn’t walk around or enjoy his time with other birds, his thing was just sit on his perch or cage and squawk all day until you would pick him up and cuddle him or hold him and scratch his head, moment you would stop he would go back to screaming. He got passed around 3 homes. The first owner used to carry him all day around his hoodie as a baby and then due to Covid he no longer had a job so he had to rehome him. This bahviour was obtained during his first months of living. The last two homes were unable to keep up with him and didn’t know what to do anymore because no matter how much time you spent with him he would still squawk and scream. He is in great health and we did screen him so we made sure it was not a health issue.

Hi everyone, i have a budgie and he likes to come to me everytime i called his name but after i got another bird which is a lovebird, my budgie started to forget about me and start cuddling with the lovebird😂

I dont pet all over. I stick with head n neck. Beak. N my bird loves cuddles, kisses, independent time, playtime, shower time and all great foods time, he loves to sit in window n get sunlight. Thanks to you, my baby bird got all well rounded treatment. My family all take care of him in everyday I do n bird loves it. I wanted to see u give them affection.

I enjoy watching your videos ! This makes a lot of sense. I have a bird that wants to be with me, enjoys sitting on my shoulder or lap or anywhere. and we play together with toys, I can call him/her and it comes. but touching or petting, big no. I don’t mind not touching its head. But he/she is really aggressive to my fingers, unless i have treats in my hands 😅.

I’m a very physical person so what I did was give my bird a treat whenever she tolerated me touching her head. Though I can tell she’s not a big fan of head pats.

Omg thanks so much

I wish my chosen lifestyle, location- environment was appropriate to get another bird or two. I enjoy their temperament. I love to interact with nature in all it's variations.

Some birds are like people and don’t like physical affection as much as others. I had two green cheek conures, one was needy and cuddly and constantly wanting affection and the other one just wanted to sit with you but he didn’t want you handling him too much. If either one didn’t want petted I just backed off and respected it and never forced it. My non affectionate conure liked being sang to and talked to and showed affection in his own way.

Have you made a video on the pros and cons of a pulled and hand reared bird vs a co-raised bird? I would love to hear your opinion on which is better or if it's species and situation dependent.

We have 2 cockatiels they would come out of the cage for treats and one of them would keep howling if she sees us asking us to take her out but sometimes she would still keep howling even she is outside of the cage ....we give her treat she calms down and again start howling once she has finished that....both of them are comfortable coming to us for treats but not with touching them

So interesting , thank you !

My african grey is naturally cuddley. I have had her for a few years and without any specific training she love her head and neck to be scratch.

Thank you for this video I have a rescued Hyacinth and now I know I was starting down the wrong path. Your video came at the right time for me.

We just got a 6 week old macaw cant wait to start training

How to make your parrot cuddly and affectionate? First it helps if you start out with the right bird.I have a 14 1/2 year old whiteface male cockatiel who is fully flighted and his cage doors have never been closed. Since he regularly flies to me,I trained him to come to me when I call his name (Angel) He doesn't come for treats but for head scritches-LOVES head scritches. Also worked with him to fly to my adult daughter and to the lady that cleans my house when they call his name. I tried the hand over the head thing after watching this video and he pushed his head further into my hand for a head scritch. Angel has never bit me, even once ,but he does hiss or lets out a soft screech if i'm doing something he doesn't like. Cockatiels love their humans. How about some cockatiel videos?

My green cheek cuddles on a schedule lol

Lol my first thought on seeing the title: Get a dog instead?

My love language is TOUCH! So it’s kinda turned all my birds into vary sweet cuddly birds....

I don’t understand how you do what you do but you are amazing with a great gift. My birds must be broken or I’m the one that’s broke. Please help 😂

My African Grey loves his pets

Our beautiful rescue Eclectus is definitely not into being pet. It is hormone triggering. We have taught him to accept a kiss on the head and are progressing to touching the wings and body for examination in case, and to help with his vet visits. But he is a total flock bird only his his human family is his flock he is amazing with everyone and slowly accepting of strangers that visit.