"He's A GREAT Dad, But A LAZY Husband"!?

Рет қаралды 12,539

Күн бұрын

Mrs Melanin & Beleaf In Fatherhood answer questions from a concerned wife whose husband does not have a job. What should the response be if a man is a great father but refuses to contribute? Do you know of any relationships like this? If you do, blink twice and wiggle your toes!
Show Notes:
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Thank you so much for tuning into this episode of How Married Are You?! See you next week!

Пікірлер: 74

@Akilahh 6 ай бұрын

Glen was spittinggg, “If we allow our son to be a man like you, we have failed”.

@pamalafloyd2704 6 ай бұрын

For me, that was a red flag when she saved to move out of his mom's house, and he wanted them to stay there. Lazy 101!!!!😶

@AmbyRockZ12 6 ай бұрын

“How bout I spot you a job?” IM SCREAMING 😂😂😂😂😂 17:23

@Sungoddessz 6 ай бұрын

I think that some women often try hard to change a man into the person they want him to be. This is who he is & who he's been for 15+ years. MOVE ON SIS

@kaylaEA_ 6 ай бұрын

I think in our community, when it comes to men, the pickings are slim. So many women try to mold or build grown male into a man.

@GabbyTeAma 6 ай бұрын

Mrs. Melanin's singing voice is so velvety smooth, it gets me every time :)

@Liyah339 6 ай бұрын

She should really get into therapy and go from there. Maybe divorce is the answer, maybe it’s not but, she needs to figure out what she wants and why she has allowed herself to be so unhappy for so long.

@boluadebekun9370 6 ай бұрын

We all stopped listening when she said I understand😂😂😂 Yvette ya gotta clarify something like that😂😂

@intentionalparenting2605 6 ай бұрын

Because they’ve been together so long she lost track of what he’s been doing because she has been in survival mode. Now, she’s exhausted and looking for his support seeing how he’s been dead weight. She finally to the point where she is able to remove the lover lenses and now she’s ready for him to go. She don’t respect him because he’s not self motivating as a man. And he could care less how much she works as long as he is taken care of.

@TheChosenSounds 5 ай бұрын

YES! EXACTLYYYYYY!

@AfrikaBorwaPoliticking 6 ай бұрын

Why would anyone make a family with someone like that?? People willingly walk into ridiculous situations and yet the writing was on the wall before having a Child. Irresponsible

@chandabwsandidge0430 6 ай бұрын

EVERYTHING y’all said was on brand. Not harsh at all. This made me a little livid… I paused and went off on him before Glen did 😅. He at the gym, work there! I HAVE to believe she’s had convos but it’s not uncommon for ppl not to communicate or to repeat the things so much that he ignores or disregards. She also didn’t really reveal his personality or how he may respond to confrontation. Like, is he auditioning or ANYTHING?! Whoo chile.

@Nycolelo 6 ай бұрын

I think she has two options: Either accept and love him for who he is. Because he is probably not going to change or won’t change for long. Or. Get a divorce. With a clear understanding that most of her problems will not fixed. But she will have more options.

@Vesta0831 6 ай бұрын

Not her saying “I don’t believe he is a good actor” 😂I’m sorry but I chuckled so much. I hope it works out for them though.

@ruthst.julien4581 6 ай бұрын

We need a hour long combination of how married are you stories😂😂😂😂they tickle me EVERYTIME 😂😂😂

@JerriCouncil 6 ай бұрын

Good evening. IMO the writer may find strength and solace by joining you, Yvette at your retreat! Why not suggest to her to buy a ticket? Also, I don't believe that Glen was harsh with his solutions.

@intentionalparenting2605 6 ай бұрын

I agree with the concept of men having proper leadership. It helps keep them responsible for their decisions and how they affect the people around them.

@cpwwjd69 6 ай бұрын

I agree with my fellow commenters. His mom is an enabler and he never grew up. He is still a child, he is comfortable in his space. He does not see any reason to change. They need counselling and a serious conversation that should have happened before marriage.

@TraciReeder-ej3cd 6 ай бұрын

My life looks better without you is deep... but so true

@boluadebekun9370 6 ай бұрын

Also side note: Liking commenting and subscribing to all your vids and podcasts so yall can afford Theo😢

@joelledavis4547 6 ай бұрын

I love what y'all did in the beginning! Love the song and how she came in with the vocals after you rapped. So smooth!!

@Jt2REAL1 14 күн бұрын

My church is using the Orange curriculum and they have a lot of good literature and resources for the different stages of a child’s life

@sonyatheoneyouseek5040 6 ай бұрын

I like how you guys put your wedding picture in the background.

@cvanny473 4 ай бұрын

Liking it off the title alone before even watching 😂. This will be goooood.

@ajalewis9009 3 ай бұрын

Omg this is my life right now😢😢... my heart goes out to this woman!

@WoundstoScars 6 ай бұрын

Great discussion. I follow on IG but My first time watching the podcast. Re-book recommendations. I wrote- Help! My Sons A Teenager as I navigate pre-teen and the early teens with my son. I have two sons 17 & 13

@arleneliftschrist6240 6 ай бұрын

I’m friends with John and my mom works with Yvette’s dad I love listening to y’all! Random facts lol

@nitarhodes42 6 ай бұрын

Absolutely love this podcast!

@practicalprincess1830 6 ай бұрын

Lmao the intros I love Yvette

@aqueteaful 6 ай бұрын

So this woman should be in prison for the rest of her life just because she made a mistake to marry this person. She should get a divorce, blaming her for getting married is not cool. Christians really believe you can't leave a terrible and unhealthy relationship and why can't he take all the domestic duties he's not working. Wow I'm grateful I don't have that mindset. She should be set free from the mistake that she made, she deserve to be happy and leaving a fulfilling life...this guy won't change.

@tgc228 6 ай бұрын

I think they were coming from this perspective because she did not highlight any conversations they have already had. They had all the smoke for the guy and highlighted divorce as an option but if she hasn't had these conversations yet then she probably should have them before reaching for the lawyers number

@aqueteaful 6 ай бұрын

@@tgc228 okay I can see that, thanks for clarifying

@arleneliftschrist6240 6 ай бұрын

My guy fumbled the lyrics lol but I love yall

@tomeikia8372 6 ай бұрын

Great show 💕💕💕long term listener

@arleneliftschrist6240 6 ай бұрын

and Frenchie does my lashes all I’m saying is we almost friends 😂😂😂

@ccarr0712 6 ай бұрын

Ohhhh... the mood swings of puberty and adolescence😮😮😮 I have an 18 yr old man child and BAAAABBBBYYYYY...I wanna run away from home sometime and I'm the Moma!!!

@Chloeeezyyy 6 ай бұрын

You all gave good advice.

@TraciReeder-ej3cd 6 ай бұрын

Please put me at the top of the list for next year's mom trip. My daughter graduates from college the same weekend this year.

@Coolct 6 ай бұрын

New SUBBIE!!🙌🏾🙌🏾

@TraciReeder-ej3cd 6 ай бұрын

COUNSELING COUNSELING COUNSELING

@JUST_MORELLA 5 ай бұрын

❤❤❤Love the intro!!

@amandahooverlester 6 ай бұрын

I love you guys. That is all. ❤😊

@minniebest2717 6 ай бұрын

Imma catch you on the next retreat Yvette cuz I got a nursing one. But hold me to it, I'll be there!

@recipebandit3563 6 ай бұрын

Your new set is beautiful and noisy😂, just kidding Brandon. Love the pod. Kudos guys

@ItsPersonalwithAshleyElle 6 ай бұрын

Glen be SPITTING

@ItsPersonalwithAshleyElle 6 ай бұрын

I like Yvette's renegotiation of terms idea too

@whenyouwishuponastar6643 6 ай бұрын

This example was interesting, especially when you asked why be against divorce in this situation. I agree, it seems like this situation has been enabled and on some level I wonder if there were actual standards that were set, or if she just nagged him about stuff every now and then. I agree with Yvette’s renegotiation of terms. It seems like there’s probably things they both could do to level up the relationship

@anointedra 6 ай бұрын

Unfortunately this is her fault. Based on the letter, she has allowed this situation. He's a Grown Boy not a man or husband. She's the work horse. Now, she needs to forgive herself, take ownership of her lack of boundaries and standards....give him the opportunity to change IF she hasn't had this conversation with him before...and then ultimately, if there's no change, choose herself...love herself better...and move on. If she doesn't, she can look up very shortly and have heart disease from stress...have a heart attack and die...and HE WILL MOVE ON with another woman....and her life insurance check. Sorry. Clearly I'm triggered by this foolishness. Smh 😂

@Canthusleme153 6 ай бұрын

Sounds like the writer’s husband is a moma’s boy and seeing that they moved in together so long it’s like they were raised like bro and sis.

@ladyraven30 3 ай бұрын

Sunscribed

@nicoles4257 6 ай бұрын

She needs to take Glen advice verbatim. Enough has been enough for that woman.

@KayJ001 6 ай бұрын

hit that like

@caliBornbEauty 6 ай бұрын

I also have a son who will neglect his hair lol. He likes the short fade over picking out his fro so we keep his short. the rest of the kids have locs like me and the hubby is a baldy like Glen lol

@snowdropthehedgehog7224 5 ай бұрын

15:14 16:29 17:00 9:22

@jamiehigh924 6 ай бұрын

Nawww, His Mom appears to be coddling her sons in allowing them to stay extra long and raise their families in her home.

@tgc228 6 ай бұрын

In the American context, maybe. But in a lot of families in the Global South, multigenerational family homes are the norm.

@viviharris2131 6 ай бұрын

Multigenerational homes may be normative in other places but so is male adults having full time work and that is what makes this situation seem very much like a second child hood situation. He wasn't a fulltime working adult household member but an adult teenager with a part time job.@@tgc228

@Chloeeezyyy 6 ай бұрын

Also, you can’t be mad that someone doesn’t meet a standard you never set. Does the wife have a father herself?

@QueenSuga405 6 ай бұрын

Her statement is true though. If you haven’t set boundaries and standards, you can’t get mad if they don’t meet them.

@KingDeeba 6 ай бұрын

what nas was talking about (if that's the song you're referring to) is about a man becoming unable to take care of himself at old age, not a man that refuses to grow up

@BeleafInFatherhood 6 ай бұрын

Yes, that’s the song. Verse two starts dude is 31 living in his moms crib”

@BeleafInFatherhood 6 ай бұрын

Relisten to the second verse and let me know your thoughts

@amosleak9519 6 ай бұрын

What happen to the ending music? I'm sorry I miss it for some reason

@joyprice209 4 ай бұрын

If they get divorced, he would go live with his mom

@annak706 6 ай бұрын

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

@eLLBdotmusic 5 ай бұрын

It sounds to me like her words are not aligned with her actions. In other words she may have been saying get a better job but her actions working extra hours say differently. She may have to cut back on a few things while he looks for a better job otherwise he may not step up. I'm sure she doesn't want to go without but most people live above their minimum needs. The good thing is she doesn't want to get a divorce. Her marriage can be restored regardless of her reasons for wanting to stay. With prayer, fasting, family counseling they will be fine if they both surrender to our Father. Grace is needed because he is used to being taken care of and she is used to living in survival mode. With Jesus, they will be restored.

@angelkingbeautytv6849 6 ай бұрын

So she’s just stuck with him? Y’all crazy 😅

@CJ-it7ue 3 ай бұрын

Listening to this the man may have a “special” spotter a the “gym”. 🤔

@suziesmith9076 6 ай бұрын

Seems like she’s taken the role of his mother and not allowed him to grow up.

@anitahayes8397 6 ай бұрын

Hello they never shouldn't married she and her husband never had grown into who they really are they was put together and a young age not knowing each other what they really want.

@srswms5157 6 ай бұрын

The husband sounds like an immature man-child.

@keishaheslop1536 6 ай бұрын

Do they believe in the Most High God? That's the first question, no?..

@EvolvingMama_ 6 ай бұрын

I missed y’all 🥹 I had to take a hiatus as I processed and experiencing separation and divorce but was recently watching First Wives Club and one episode they said “How Married Are You?” And I’ve only heard that expression from y’all 🫶🏾