I have actually helped de-TERF a TERF recently. It's been a very reassuring, hopeful experience. Hope she sticks with it... but she's been respecting pronouns and identity so far, soooo... Finger's crossed!

With the name things at school. Imagine a kid being like "Yeah, my name is technically Anabella, but I prefer Bella. It makes me feel more comfortable" and the teacher just being like "What? No! Its Anabella! That's your name, you can't change it!"

About preferred names: i work in the medical field and we do require legal names on documents, but we add notes to profiles and always use a client's preferred name/ pronouns when speaking with them. Its not that hard to respect someone.

My straight Grandmother encountered everything from World War II and Vietnam to 9/11. If she can comprehend and treat trans individuals with empathy, it's not unreasonable to invite younger feminists to be kind to trans people. Hopefully this de-TERF trend can continue.

Good news for trans Floridians! A judge ruled every trans law null, so they cannot apply. Florida (at least for now) is a better place for trans ppl! A win!!!!!

THE TITLE IS EVERYTHING! Also, a person acknowledging their narrow-mindedness and apologising? Will wonders never cease?

Former TERF here. I thought it was about women rights, found out it was about being gratuitally mean to struggling people and ceased to be that.

If sharks are the trans support animals, I wanna make axolotls the non-binary support animals. They’re so cute.💚✨🏳️‍⚧️

The substitute teacher using the deadname is ridiculous. I remember in school, the register would be ammended all the time so that "Thomas" was called out as "Tom" and similar, so there's clearly a way of ammending it! If it's not noted correctly, it's as simple as a quick sorry followed by a correction

Jammi, there are LOADS of us older lesbians who got fed up with the authoritarian bullshit surrounding "TERF" and so decided to sit down, shut up and actually LISTEN to some actual trans people! I know for my wife and I when we claimed to be "terf" we ALWAYS said right up front that we supported FULL rights for trans people, we just didn't understand certain things and being OLDER (I'm 57, she's 65), we were very out of date with modern feminism. Personally I am grateful to PhilosophyTube for helping me understand. Anyway, plenty of us oldsters are trying our damn best to get up-to-date, at the very least in order to stop giving energy to the authoritarian, right-wing ogres. We're listening, we're thinking, we're reading, we honestly are trying if anyone wants to give us a bit of grace, undeserved as it may be.

even if the kid was punished by the school for 'inappropriate' language, that's detention level, a suspension for that is insane

HE PRONOUNCED BLÅHAJ CORRECTLY!!! That's how you know you've hit the Trans Level Cap. EDIT Or almost correctly, anyway

I don’t get the people who think being trans is a choice. When I was about ten, I thought about the way people treated gay people (it was the 90’s, and super bad) and realized no one would choose that. No one would look at the world the way that it is and say “you know what? I think I’ll be gay. Everyone makes fun of gay people, it’s apparently fine to fire people for being gay, and some people will just straight up kill you about it. That’s what I feel like doing! That’s what I want for me!” So yeah. I was ten, it was the homophobic 90’s, and I put that together. People thirty years later and older than me insisting trans people choose to be trans are pretty freaking stupid, if you ask me.

I work as a private tutor, and had one time when a referral company called me up and said they had a student available for me,"but she's trans." I found out that this kid hadn't been able to get tutors because she was trans, and people apparently refused to teach her. Her mum was respectful of her pronouns, but didn't like the name she chose for herself, so called her something different?? (It was so weird. To her mum I had to call her 'Bella' and to her I had to call her 'Amanda'.) She was a delight to teach, and the company started to refer more trans kids to me, as well as other queer kids. It's awful how little support they get.

Section 28 was in place when I was at school. During our half an hour (in total) of sex education, the teacher told us "condoms are the best way to prevent STDs". A boy asked how Lesibians should protect themselves. The teacher said she was "not allowed to admit to to you that gay people exist." There was a shocked silence then he said "what if a girl in this class is gay? She could get AIDS!". The teacher replied that she wasn't allowed to answer. There was no treatment yet for HIV, it was a death sentence. Even the most homophobic bullies were shocked at the incident.

"Disrespecting the authority of the teacher" No gods, no masters, no substitute teachers. 🏴🏴‍☠️🏳️‍⚧️

For the first story as a trans student in the UK, you don't need a legal name for the registration, it can be changed mine is my preferred

the parent of the suspended child needs to skip the emails and request an in-person meeting with the principal and/or the district superintendent. i don't know what was said in the email back-and-forth but if there is documentation that the official school policy is a substitute teacher can deadname and misgender a student (who is correctly named and gendered by the rest of the school staff) and the STUDENT is punished for affirming their identity, that sounds like a slam dunk lawsuit that the ACLU would *love* to take on. respect is a two-way street and a teacher, substitute or otherwise, cannot command respect and absolute authority while simultaneously disrespecting a student's identity and preferences.

I’ve always hated this double standard where a teacher can behave as disrespectfully toward a student as they please with little to no consequence so long as they don’t cross over any legal boundaries. But if a _student_ pushed back toward that behavior, they receive all the punishment regardless of the reasons that pushed them to be disrespectful. It’s this demand for students to be compliant and quiet above all else, even when they’ve been fundamentally disrespected as a person, that just agitates me even without the added transphobia.

I don't understand why people are not taking advantage of these atrocious laws being passed in America and the UK. The second they try to ban mention of "sexuality and gender identity" I will demand malicious compliance. If anything remotely related to lgbt+ is not going to be allowed than i will insist that the law be followed for any gender identity or sexuality and they seem to forget that includes being straight and cisgender.

I was outed to my parents by my conservative work coach, and my parents are fine with it, but im not happy about being outed... Edits: The work coach is from a company that helps people (mostly disabled and neutodiverget people) to find jobs. One of the co-founder is supposedly from the opus dei sect. They are the one who outed me. I'm a social activities group with them, and the workers there respect my name and pronouns. Also, I'm leaving the orientation at the end of this month and the social group in the next one. I'm not from the UK or US. Also, thanks for the support.

Right, saying "ideology" is a way of dehumanizing the people by reframing our existence as a philosophical concept

The best way to overcome prejudice is to get to know and interact with people from that group. Years ago a friend of mine talked me into transmedicalism, which is TERF adjacent, out of a misguided sense of allyship for our transmasculine friend. Of course this belief was formed without his input. It wasn't until my friend actually spoke to a number of trans people that he found out transmedicalism is a form of exclusionism based on class and privilege. Transness is a spectrum, and not every trans person wants, needs, or can afford to transition in a very specific way deemed acceptable to heteronormative society. This internalized transphobia hurt me most of all, as it was the biggest obstacle to my even questioning whether I might be trans. Had I known more trans people growing up, I might have realized my lived experiences weren't all that different from their own.

Im training to be certified as a teacher in Ontario, Canada. The main thing we are taught over and over and over again is that the priority of the school is on the STUDENT, not the TEACHER. If something happens, you take care of the student first, not the teacher’s feelings!

I'm going to admit, when I was a kid my first exposure to 'transgender' were those outrageous news stories about cismen using it to go into the wrong bathroom. So while I didn't give a shit about the bill since a bathroom is a bathroom, it also made me think that being transgender was an arbitrary choice people made. It wasn't until I got older that I learned what it really meant was "My body is different from my mind, and I'm trying to fix that." Well it helped that I was open to learning things I didn't know, but I definitely did have those biases when I was younger so channels like yours make it a lot easier to overcome those initial biases and understand what I can help my trans friends/family with as an ally. Thank you for talking about your experiences and creating a space for many others to share theirs too. I'm grateful to be able to learn from it.

I left the echo chamber of "terfblr" in late 2017 early 2018 after my mental health severely declined and I was hospitalised. Once my mind was clear, I found Kat Black + you at the same time and became my old not-hating self again! Pretty sure I left a comment like this at the time thanking you, so again, thank you all amazing folks

4:49 Some faculty members in school used to get this power trip by shutting down a student’s decision and this ‘don’t argue back’ nonsense when all you’re doing is trying to piece together the truth.

As a transgender girl in school I don’t understand why they can’t change the name in he register as mine has been and I’ve not been able to go on hormone blockers let alone oestrogen because of turf parents

I got misgendered by my coworker (wrong pronouns) and when I tried to correct she told me she doesn’t believe in my pronouns and told me to ‘respect’ her culture when I tried to gently explain :’) I worked with her for over a year and this is the first time this happened (started working there introducing my pronouns as they/them 2 years ago)

Some teachers are just awful. If a kid tells you my name is XXX you just go with it. When I was 11 (many many moons ago when the dinosaurs walked the earth) my family moved home and I went to a new school. One teacher there always changed my name Annegret to Annerose. Yeah Annerose it's pretty but it's not me, she could have called me Anne but no. I got in trouble first for correcting her, then for ignoring her and then for the last time for kicking her leg and screaming at her. Can't even imagine if someone would constantly misgender me on purpose.

If any establishment can cope with women taking their husband's surname when they marry, and reverting to maiden name after divorce and changing their title from Miss to Mrs to Dr to Ms, it can cope with changing to preferred names

I used to be a transphobe and homophobe too because I was basically raised in a Christian echo chamber. I realized that the problem was that I never actually took the time to listen to trans people experience... It was always through sensationalist articles and tv news but talking irl to people really opened my eyes. And also.. reading actual books on the subject is fundamental instead of listening to weird podcasts. My apologies for being an a***le for a couple of years.

Responding to the last one, I think that a LOT of cis people don't understand how hard it is to be trans. I had a relative tell me that my "decision to become a girl" was thought through with my head more than my heart, which is actually hilarious. I don't know where that guy thinks society is, but it is NOT gonna make my life easier being a trans woman, or even just a woman. Can't beat old cis men 😂

"Authority" is the final fallback of schools. In America, school is less about actual learning than drilling obedience into kids. So talking back can get you smacked down. Telling them they're wrong can do the same thing. Because submission is honestly more important to the structures than maintaining their façade of being an institution for betterment. That's why they will default to authority when no rules have been broken justifying a suspension.

You used all the pride fabric?! How could you?! Now my Pansexual Panorama is ruined!!! 😂 Lol

Blahaj actually has commercials that show she is trans friendly and something about how Blahaj in commercials in some countries is transfemme

As a mom and daughter of a teacher, I would suggest the parent in the first scenario bring her concerns up the chain of command if they aren't getting the response they should. They are treating this like "Kate is being called Katherine" and not with the seriousness one would expect. If this is a public school, they should take this situation up to the district or the media. I would also talk to the child about her wishes and go through scenarios with her about how changing schools might not necessarily solve the problem. If this sub was only there for a day, it would be hasty to leave the school over.

5:14 In Canada there is a system where you can have your preferred name on most school documentation. My preferred name is even on my diploma!

The parent should sue the school district.

I went by a name that wasn't my first name during public school ... it was never an issue. So aggravating that a teacher deadnamed the girl after she explained her preferred name!

Good on that ex-terf rejecting their wicked ways. It's fantastic that you helped that person overcome their bigotry!

In the first story, the parent needs to make an appointment and go in and speak to them in person. They won't take it as seriously via email as they will if the parent comes in to speak to the principal, teacher, and councelor.

The supportive parents warm my heart, the school p*sses me off and I'm glad the ex-TERF has come around.

The mum asking if doing enough ... damn that was a full on cry moment

About the suspended daughter: Abusers are no authority! End of story. That teacher lost authority the moment he was abusive and thus she has NOT insulted a person with authority at all. She has defended herself against abuse and that school went and enabled an abuser, which speaks a lot on just HOW abusive abusers are if they manage to make the school's staff go into "fawn response". 🤦🏻‍♀️

About the disrespectful teacher, 1000 years ago in Sept 1979, 1st tutorial, 1st year of 2ndry school our teacher asked the 11 year olas if any of them preferred to be called something different to our names on the enrollment sheet. 1979 and she had no issue with it.

having a parent that wants you to be happy would have been nice.

"Shakespeare would have cried" is the funniest thing i've heard all week

I’m proud to not be a terf

I respect that parent for not throwing hands at their daughter's school. My son has run into deadname problems at school twice. And both times turned out to be misunderstandings and blew over before I got an assault charge. Once a lunch lady asked my son's name and he said "do you want my real name or my legal name?" And the lunch lady thought she was being sassed. Which I think is pretty fair, my son can be quite sassy even when he isn't trying. And the other time was a substitute bus driver that missed the memo and called my son's deadname during roll. IIRC he corrected it as soon as my son said something. His school has been super about it and the only "issue" is that he can't use the boys bathroom and has to use the nurse's, but I honestly think that's safer for him and he waffles on whether he even wants to use the boys bathroom.

I was first raging xenophobe, but meeting right people changed me. First learned that nationality and race doesn't matter. Then learned that gays are not weirdos and perverts, but same as other people. Later learned that there is no "woke gay agenda", there is just people wanting to live decent life, be happy and safe. After that learned being gender-queer is okay, even guy in drag can be undistinguishable from cis woman and beautiful on their own merit... And around year ago my egg cracked, that "magical pill that can change me into girl" I(27M) was dreaming of since 12 already existed long ago and there is nothing wrong in me thinking like that... too bad we got transition banned around the same time.

I had to have a horrible conversation with a family member a couple years ago. The family member was a teacher at the time. They had a pupil who was exploring their gender identity. The young person had asked to be called by several different names and different pronouns over the course of the school year. The young person had been dead named by another teacher earlier in the day and was naturally upset. They had decided to take a protest of silence in terms of replying to the register. My family member and this young persons teacher called out their current preferred name. When they did not respond, another young person responded on their behalf and said that they were silently protesting to being dead named. My family member reacted in a similar way to the temp teacher and sent the young person out and berated them for insubordination. And the school punished the young person with suspension. Said family member came home and told me what had happened and used transphobic language. This made me angry. We had a long conversation about how inappropriate and unfair the language they had used was and discussed the confusion and need for support that young person had. Said family member is no longer a TERF and hangs pride flags in the windows for all of June.

Some people are soooo fixed on "cultural" norms and (let's be honest) genitals that they can't get themselves out of this mindspace. Trying metaphores and comparitions probably will not work. I'm cis and I know I don't "get" what being trans feels like (same as I don't know what it feels like being a black woman in Alabama, or a refugee, you get the drill). I usually limit myself to explain that calling someone by chosen name is easy, everyone knows a "Bob" who goes by "Bubba" or an "Anne" who prefers her middle name "Stacy", and nobody has a problem with this, so if "Tom" asked you to call him "Mary" from now on you can do it. This surface level approach will not help them understand, but they might not be pricks in day to day life, and for me that's a win.

🎵Hey! Teacher! Leave that kid alone! All in all you're just a- another brick in the wall!🎵

I’m cis, and I have two Blåhajs

At one point, IKEA Canada also had a Blahaj available for trans kids that was in the trans flag colors and I'm sad they aren't more widely available.

I don’t think I should be here this early- 😭😭😭

That first story really peeves me because schools are supposed to teach HOW to get to the correct answers instead of memorizing correct answers. That school seems to know what the "right" answers are (using preferred name/correct pronouns) but don't understand the damage transphobia causes (if they understood, they'd do exactly as Jaimie pointed to and punish the teacher.) Good thing I was taught to show my work instead of just trying to show an answer.

Blå haj (blahaj in one word whif no å in your keyboard) is bleu shark in swedish and the soft toy is from Ikea. Thanks for explaining that its the colors that make trans people like them. This toy has been sold for like 20 year's.

I'm a trans man who used to be a TERF. Yes, I know it may sound insane but I actually was a part of this shithole for a year in the past (worst experience and time of my life, wouldn't recommend). I can't say exactly when it started but can say where - it was on Twitter. I genuinely enjoyed spending my time there because I was an introverted kid who really wanted to discussed his interests (series, anime, books) with someone and Twitter was not a bad place for it. I'm also a feminist and at that time was very engaged in it (trying really hard to be a woman and find any happiness in womanhood, didn't go well ha). And somehow I ran into different posts of radical feminists. Initially there were various discussions about inequality and stupidity of patriarchal system, there was a lot of anger in those posts but like... understandable anger, it's sucks to have to deal with all of these issues. But after some time new topics came up on my feed: hating on men and trans people. And okay, I get it, sometimes men do horrible things and we should call them out, but often in those posts appeared the idea that all men are bad, they socialize that way and it's nothing wrong with hating all them no making any difference (aka KAM). Now I think that those statements pushed back my acceptance of my trans identity for several years because I hated men and was scared of them shitless. What they say about trans community is awful, the most awful for me now that I believed them. They make it look their "point of view" is the only right thing. They make you believe that trans people confirming to gender stereotypes (which is not true) and create "unnecessary" gender identities. They mock them, making fun of them and spread lies. And when you're a scared confused kid who desperately try to belong somewhere (for example, trans dude like me) you can get caught in their trap. It was really toxic, I never posted anything TERF-y or harassed anyone, just believe their views, but still I felt I was rotting inside. I still remember one of their posts when they discussed how lots of them "were trans guys" and thought that eventually my desire (longing even) to be a man will disappear. It didn't. One day I decide to check out some trans creator (don't remember who) to look at the issue on different point of view. It was enough for me to become a trans ally, I was touched and also disgusted of my past self. It's like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders, I left this constant state of hate, fear and anger, it was a relief. Looking back I think that it was some sort of twisted coping mechanism. Basically I hated myself and it took a long time to accept this important part of me. I like to be a man, I'm not ashamed anymore but it was a hard way to go. I wish I hadn't this shameful experience but unfortunately I did. And it makes my heart ache every time I see disgusting things TERFs say. It makes me really sad to see TERFs in queer community, place that I found comfortable for years. It sucks to see a big amount of TERFs in my country (Russia), because of it I afraid to come out not only to cishets but also to queer people (especially queer women). So I stay in the closet. Happy Pride, trans folks, I love you so much, you're strong, powerful, unique, amazing and certainly enough. I wish all the best for each of you. (And sorry for any mistakes, my English is not perfect)

In the US, I've worked as a substitute teacher and a rule I was informed of with one district I worked with was disrespect of a substitute was an automatic in-school suspension. At minimum. Swearing at a teacher, even with cause, would be considered disrespecting a substitute's authority. I give very good odds this young lady swore (and I get it), and the school likely wouldn't inform the parents if actions were taken regarding the teacher for legal reasons.

I will say, I can respect when people who did/believed crappy things can at least say “I’m sorry” and “I was wrong”. Like it would have been better if you didn’t do or believe those things in the first place, but at least you can own up to it now?

The crab messiah used to be woven into the fabric of the universe, but is now here to spread the good word of the truth.

I just met Jamie, Shaaba, and Mercury Stardust last night and it was one of my favorite experiences! Jamie thank you so much for signing my Pud, Spuds McKenzie! And I'm sorry if I seemed out of it, I was in tremendous pain lol

Unfortunately, as a Floridian substitute teacher, the student being suspended is only surprising in its severity, indicating that this student either has prior disciplines which have escalated to the point of suspension or the student's reaction included offensive and/or threatening language or gestures. No member of educational staff can be forced to acknowledge a student's gender or pronouns in Florida, and we are advised to use their assigned sex and legal name. That is true in several other states as well. "Don't Say Gay" type laws have caused a lot of anxiety for LBGT+ educators and allies. I started carrying a tote bag with art using the aroace sunset flag colors and wore a small heart shaped snake pin with those colors during Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week. I only felt comfortable to do that because it's a lesser-known pride flag and pretty subtle for pride merch. I figured I couldn't talk about it, but if a student was in the community enough to know the flag, they might feel some kind of silent support. Usually though, I'm worrying about things like, "If I use a student's preferred name and pronouns when they have unsupportive guardians, will my job be at risk if they report me?" or, "If a student specifically and insistently asks if I'm ace during independent work and I tell the truth because I hate lying, can I get in trouble?" "What can I do if another staff member is being openly homophobic or transphobic? Would voicing even mild criticism get me blacklisted from the school?" I'm not in a financial position where I can afford to take those risks. Do you know how many middle school students (~11-14) still casually use gay as an insult? At least half where I live. Casual racism? at least 20% Genuine misogyny (more than an offhand 'joke')? about 10% Those are statistics for when I am in the classroom and can hear them through the chatter, so I shudder to think what they're like when there are no adults around.

Someone should write a joke story that's just Jamie working on all his businesses. Just like jokingly writing him making and running them. I feel like it would be hilarious because they were all awesome

For the kid that got suspended, take her out for a fun day, get some ice cream, maybe buy her some stuff. Turn it into a punishment into a vacation. School won't budge, so just don't treat it like they want you to.

Omg... my name is legally changed (about 2 months now) but I still get people calling for "deadname" because nothing has caught up with anyone yet, especially in the VA, even though I've submitted all the imperative paperwork. I've gotten to the point where I answer them with "I don't go by that name anymore but this is the person your looking for." Thankfully most people are perfectly accepting of this and correct themselves but it's still really annoying that I even have to tell them this.

🦈🦈🦈🦈 actually, I don’t remember which way it was, but the anatomy of the plush is of one the 2 shark sexes (I don’t remember which one) but bloha (that’s definitely not how it’s spelt) is a gendered name corresponding to the sex that is not expressed on the plush, thus rendering the shark trans. Also, big overlap in between trans and neurodivergent folk, and in my experience, all neurodivergent folk that I’ve crossed paths with knowingly at some point were fascinated by sharks

Blåhaj was in a comercial for trans rights from IKEA I think

Some people just suck. That substitute is a disrespectful shite and the fact that the school is supporting them over the student sucks.

I would stop emailing and go to the school for a face to face meeting and SEE how the school is actually respecting her daughter as the girl she IS!!!

Used to be friends with someone who used to be a TERF, but once she learned I was trans (I hid it from her but she figured it out), she completely flipped and became more understanding and open to trans issues. Even if we're not friends anymore, it honestly feels good that I am responsible for changing her very hateful views, and she's said as much and is also grateful. Also my friends and I make fun of this same woman for becoming more misogynistic as she became less transphobic🗿🗿🗿

On the subject of trying to get a transphobe to understand: I would absolutely agree that a cis person shouldn't try to overexplain the trans experience. I do think there is a sort of basic level when you're engaging with someone who doesn't seem ideologically entrenched, where you can ask why they're so bothered by something that doesn't really affect them that much. Obviously being trans isn't like being goth or something, but there is that very surface-level comparison where you can point out that it's not okay to react negatively to the way another person presents themselves just because it's unfamiliar to you. It's more about getting them over that immediate knee-jerk "ugh, WEIRD, I don't like it" response - and even if they never go further than that, at least they aren't running around complaining about it in public.

a point about the register names: at my school, i know multiple trans people who have all (quite easily) gotten their chosen name added to the register, and it appears that way in the exact place where first names go. their legal names are only shown if you click on further options to see other details about the student. its very easy and all they had to do is get parents permission from what i know. maybe stuff works differently in america but this seems like quite a normal thing to allow

Strictly because she was trans. No teacher ever had a problem with calling me or my brother by our nick names, despite it not being the name on the roles.

I used to be a terf too. Mainly because I was barely going into high school and was only hearing the negatives about trans women being “biological men in women’s sports,” and how they would dominate. Now I really don’t care what anyone does lol. Also I’ve been waiting, I really really want you to react to the new Genspect video about an autism trans link. Edit: I also currently try and advocate for LGBTQIA+ in my Christian family. And their biews are upsetting

I'm a teacher and I think it's healthier to begin your first class with a group of students by letting them know they may correct me if I say it wrong. In any case the school should be more inclusive for everyone.

I’m a long way from cis, but I’ll admit to having failed to explain what it means to be trans to people because my explanations are so rooted in my own experiences. I settled on “I function optimally as a gender that differs from the one that is associated with the anatomy I appeared to have at birth”, but that’s just me 😅. I think if you know one trans person you know ONE trans person.

Oh my gosh the first 2 stories with supportive parents almost made me cry! (Probably because it’s shark week but oh well). I’m ftm and I’m planning on coming out to my parents tonight! I know for a fact that they’ll be supportive but I’m still pretty nervous about it, but hearing all of those stories are really reassuring

I think it's just because sharks are really cool, and blåhaj is really cute.

That teacher's attitude is vile, it's the equivalent of telling someone that "You'll never be what you think you are, so stop pretending!" 😢 The teacher is pretending that they're somehow a decent human being

That post about the parent asking if they were doing enough for their trans son made me cry, I was not much older than him when I came out, and now a couple years later, I still don't have permission to get the things he has, I had to buy my binder secretly and I still don't really have the opportunity to get masc underwear. I still consider my parents supportive, but no matter how much I've tried to explain these things to them, they're more afraid that they're going to get it wrong to even try, my Mum struggles a lot with my name and even created a whole new nickname based on my deadname because that felt more comfortable for her. My Dad is also trying, by reading a book about being Non-binary, that he has had for 3 years, and still hasn't read. I really didn't realise that this wasn't that common, I mean, it's technically a secret and a violation of school policy that some of my teachers are using my name over my deadname because neither of my parents has specifically consented for me to change my name on the register

9:23 the deadname vs preferred name.. it’s so dumb to not have their name in parenthesis in the attendance or in the system. In my job I have changed my last name when I got married. And they always have my new last name in parenthesis wherever it’s not corrected in the system. I don’t understand why we can’t do that in school for trans kids?

Have a non-binary kid in middle school. At the beginning of the year, they asked EVERY kid their preferred name, and most kids go by not-their-legal-name, even the cis kids. It's so ingrained that I use their preferred name when calling in and excusing their absence from the school and it has never caused any problems. For everything EXCEPT the most legal forms, they use everyone's preferred names. It's Not. That. Hard.

Funny thing about blahaj is my daughter randomly saw the blahaj at Ikea (where we rarely go) and got it, and like a week or two later suddenly it was all over the place in trans spaces. She was so excited because we'd gotten the only one left and the chances of uaving bought it were crazy.😅 This was the second time something like this happened-- the first was me happening to buy the "trans" squishmallow deer for her without knowing it was a trans icon. She was so excited.🥰

As a substitute in the US, ive had students throw things at me and yell at me, not to mention physically attacking each other and flat out ignoring me. None have gotten more than a lunch detention. Subs have no authority in the classroom for the most part, at least in my experience. Weird hill for the school to stake out.

Attendance list as an excuse for misgendering was a common theme in my high school

This is really surprising. It really restores my faith in humanity

I'm a teacher at a middle and high school. I have one transkid, and when creating new classes a colleague from administration said their dead name. The horror me and my direct colleague had😮 We were mortified that the dead name was still in the system as their real name. Luckily we found out now and not next year in the attendance list...

5:22 I experienced this with a substitute teacher, except I despised my legal (before I knew I was on the non-binary spectrum) and instead be called by a nickname. They seemed very annoyed by that and made me feel like garbage when it was never a problem with any other subs... Transphobic or not, no one should disregard a name when someone asks to be called something else...

i thought you were the ex-terf at first

Hi Jamie! Thanks for the wonderful videos. They have been and still are so helpful. Me and my family are very grateful the info you’ve provided us with. Thanks for that. 😊 I’ll be getting top surgery soon And hopefully all will go well. I just wanted to let know how thankful I am people like you (content creators / all the wonderful people in the community) have made such a great difference to people like me. Thank you!

Ex-TERF, huh? Welcome to the real world, I guess? I don't know how to say that without seeming like an indifferent jerk. Hi Jammie, I'm trans girl in Washington State 🏳️‍⚧️🤟🏽💙

Frankly, I don’t think a teacher is above anyone else in terms of deserving respect. I think the student was perfectly within her rights to push back against such flagrant disrespect with any harsh words she deemed necessary. Respect is not just given, it must be shown to be received. If you begin a relationship with anyone by disrespecting their very personhood, I don’t think anyone should have to tolerate that. This strikes a nerve with me because I suffered serious trauma from not being listened to, respected, or taken seriously throughout my school experience as a child. This can ruin you for decades. I was taking antidepressants in grade school because my depression and anxiety was starting to manifest is physical symptoms. I became a very angry, violent child- and if it wasn’t for a change in my environment, a teacher who really cared, and a LOT of personal work and self reflection, I don’t want to think about where I would be. Certainly, though, a much darker place. Listen to children. You aren’t raising children, you’re raising adults, and we need more adults with less needless damage that causes them to live in dysfunction and pain, or even be detrimental to our progress as a society.

I am a former Mumsnetter. I pretty much left Mumsnet because of Terfs. I actually believe that the radicalisation of Mumsnet was started by one person, not Posie Parker, this was long before her time, but a person who came in with what appeared to be feminist arguments. How you radicalise a group of people is to tell them THEIR rights are being stripped by another group of people. It's similar to the far right blaming immigrants for lack of housing. Some of my Mumsnet friends have trans kids and that rhetoric was very hurtful to them but their former friends were too far down the rabbit hole to be supportive. They say "trans ideology" is a cult buf they can't seem to see that they're the ones in the cult

No teacher, when calling out the name "Katherine" would object when a student said, "But call me Kate" Or when calling out the name "Richard" would object when a student said, "But call me Dick." So the problem is the substitute teacher. Not only should the student not be suspended, but the teacher should not be able to come back to teach. The second one is actually far more important. If they haven't removed that teacher from the sub pool, it's time to look for another school.

Yeah. I was VERY transphobic through highschool and said/did some pretty awful things. It turns out 🏳️‍⚧️I'm trans🏳️‍⚧️. Rough going man. I feel like I'll never make up for all the awful I put out in the world and try my hardest every day to be visible, loud, and compassionate in my advocacy for us all. It's not always explicit intent that leads people down those far right roads. Sometimes it's simply being lost and feeling alone in a society that doesn't give you the opportunities you're actually looking for.

dude supportive parents of lgbt kids make my heart melt, i know it’s the standard, but unfortunately there are so so many homophobic and transphobic parents. i’m super lucky to have supportive parents, they are incredible people who honestly knew i was a lesbian before i did.😭

"Disrespecting authority". The authority to dictate your name & your gender to you. But supposedly we're the ones forcing it on everyone.