I actually went to primary school with a girl who had selective mutism!! When spoken to by a teacher, she would not speak a word... not even for the fire alarm. No matter how many times the teachers told her (sometimes even told her off) for not saying “here” for the fire drill, she would not say a word. She wouldn’t even smile either. But in the playground with her friends she would be smiling and talking.

watching the fish swim around while listening to Evie is so calming

I was friends with someone who was selectively mute in middle school. She never said a word in class or to me, but she would smile and nod at my jokes or questions and that was enough for me. I hated how other people would try to befriend her and be nice to ‘get her to talk to them.’ I didn’t care if she never spoke to me, I could tell she enjoyed being around me so she was my friend and I had no expectations. Plus I’m chatty enough to carry on a convo for two and she was a good listener who payed attention to my dramatic stories. When she came to my birthdays I saw her whispering to her mom and brother so I think she was mute to people outside her house. I didn't know the word selectively mute or anything at the time, so its only now I realize this We went to different high schools. Two years after middle school we met up in a mall and when I walked up to her she said hi and spoke a bit. I was surprised of course because I’d been friends with her for 5 years in middle/elementary and she never spoke. But I didn’t comment on it at all because while that’s great for her I know people don’t like being made a spectacle of. So I just smiled and said hi back and then we went for lunch. Was nice. Too bad we lost contact

I know your whistle is a tic. But it’s literally a perfect whistle and I love it every time 😭💕

as an autistic person who’s non-verbal a lot of the time, i really appreciate this and i think you did a wonderful job explaining it so thank you :)

looks like you dropped this- * gives you your crown * edit: tysm for the likes! most i’ve ever gotten here ;)

One of my classmates had selective mutism in high school. The teachers were so nice & never "forced" her to speak up or answer questions, they'd communicate on paper. Senior year you could even see her whispering with friends at school, it made me happy for her :)

It should be called circumstantial mutism, the word selective makes people assume it’s a choice. Also, when you were mute, did you still have vocal tics or just physical tics?

I think it's called "selective" mutism because the person has the ability to speak, but they just can't at different times.

My daughter stopped talking for about 6 months in school when she was 7. I found out some kids were teasing her about her speech impediment. I was so mad but her teacher was amazing and was a great support. She's still really anxious and scared to talk to people at 13 but she can if she really wants to. I love your videos ❤

This made me realise I might of had selective mutism in school… the teachers never heard me speak, even when they asked me a direct question, i just couldn’t respond verbally. I remember feeling scared because no one understood and I was bullied quite badly for it. Everyone thought I was just rude. I’ll never forget the teachers antagonising me in front of the whole class. Asking me a question and then saying “we can wait all day if we have to” or “you’re holding the class up again” But it seemed no one acknowledged me as a person with feelings because I didn’t speak, so I guess it went unnoticed! I hope schools offer more support these days rather than picking on kids with anxiety. Thank you for sharing your story. You helped me solve mine

I have autism and my selective mutism has gotten a lot worse over lockdown and I lost the ability to talk to extended family on zoom. I used to be able to talk a bit (only answering questions and very short sentences but I could still talk) but now I haven’t said anything to anyone other than my parents and my friend since January 2020 ever though I’ve been on zoom calls with them. I hope one day I can conquer it because I feel like my family don’t know me at all. I specifically remember the last thing I said to someone other than my parents and my friend, It was to my grandma who came over to lunch. She was there for about an hour and the only thing I said to her was “yes” when she asked me if I could swim lol.

I still have selective mutism to this day, I will become mute when I'm under a lot of anxiety. I stream for a living and sometimes I go mute on stream, but we actually found out that because I also have Tourette's if the chat repeatedly triggers my vocal tics, after maybe 10 minutes I'll be out of it. Something about my tics forcing my voice out helps me reset my speech almost

Im an 18 year old girl and I've been mute around my Mum for the last year and a half and it's awful and scary. I'm so glad you're sharing you're experience. It makes me feel less alone. Thank you!💖

I was never a selective mute. I have very bad panic attacks that cause me to be unable to speak. U describe it perfectly. How u so badly want to talk but ur brain physically won’t let u. I’ve actually had people get mad at me for not talking during a panic attack. I’m really glad I found someone who can describe what goes on in someone’s head when ur physically unable to speak. I’m glad I know I’m not alone.💜

I feel like "situational mutism" would be a better term rather than selective because I think the use of that word is probably why there's so many misconceptions about it! Thank you for sharing your story 💕

In the question about comparing 'choice and selective', I think you could say that it's selective because the involuntary part of your brain chooses not to talk, while the voluntary part wants to talk but just can't?

For me it’s like that lump in your throat before you burst into tears, but I’m not going to cry and the lump doesn’t go away. I couldn’t control it for years, but now I’m a lot better, and I drink a cool glass of water in sips and I find that helps open up my throat, for me anyway, and then I let myself speak just one word at a time, even if I have to take a break between words to breathe and pause before I can say the next one. Otherwise I have communicated over text, by writing on my phone and showing whoever the message. Mine is only when I’m in a confrontational situation or I feel threatened, I think it’s just basically ptsd for me. So after a few hours it will come back gradually when I’m away from the situation. Now when I do talk and am having an episode, the more I talk the more it frees up my throat and stuff and the easier it gets, but the next time it happens I’ll be starting from square one again. It can vary in severity, sometimes it’s not so bad, other times it feels like I can’t breathe or swallow and I open my mouth but just can’t speak at all

As an autistic person who experiences selective mutism, I really appreciate you bringing this to light for more people because of how not talked about it is! It's also nice hearing that what I experience is not something I experience alone!

I’ve been mute since I was around three years old when I started preschool. Even after seeing a psychologist, when I started school, I didn’t speak to teachers at all. I only had a few select friends who I felt comfortable enough to talk to, and even then I had to whisper to them so no one would hear me (there were cases where teachers would spy on me and my friends to hear me speak so I was kinda paranoid bc of that lolz). I started second grade in a new school in hopes I would speak there. It only got worse tho. In summary, I just finished 10th grade and I’m 16 and no one at school has ever heard my voice. For a long time, I was being threatened by my school to be kicked out if I didn’t make any progress regarding my sm. They always had sympathy tho and knew that I was holding up well at school with my grades and had lots of supportive friends. Because of quarantine, my mental health was at rock bottom (and still think it is) and I started to do really bad during online school. Now, I’ve been kicked out because I didn’t get any better with selective mutism, and as the “cherry on top” failed basically all my classes this year. I'm doing some admission tests now for a new school and hopefully get admitted in :’) I don’t want to go to a new school and start all over again and lose the connections I had at my old school. But I know it's for the better and new starts are always good. I'm just hoping that I will not make the same mistake again at my new school and have a promising future in school, college, and life :)

i feel like teachers really should have to learn about this topics (obviously not to a professionals level but enough so they know how to treat kids n young ppl properly) and anything related to neurodivergency because it’s so often heard how schools are where the major difficulty appears for anyone in the ND spectrum. it’s not fair that children are sometimes mistreated or punished for their circumstances or inabilities and it’s something we must change soon

I’m autistic and suffer with selective mutism. Thank you for this amazing video Evie, it’s so informative! 💖💖

Can we talk about how strong Evie is for even making a video about this after all these years, to spread awareness. So proud💜💜

this is one of the first times ive seen selective mutism in a title and also one of the first times ive actually commented on a video mainly because it makes me feel so much better knowing that someone else has been through something so close to me thank you for bringing awareness ❤️ you're incredible :)

Bubba is so cute 💜

Thank you for talking about this! I've had selective mutism for several years when I was a kid, and I stll have to deal with anxiety today. it's true, a lot of people have no idea of what selective mutism is, since it's something relatively rare. That's why talking about it is important! I am trying to spread awarness myself

I am a speech therapist and had a child with selective mutism on my caseload when I was in clinicals at my school. I didn’t know much about it that the time, and I really wish I had learned more about it in school. Thank you so much for sharing your story! I will keep it in mind going forward in my practice!

I'm so happy you're talking about this, Evie you're the one that made me comfortable with my tourette and even learn about myself morn tho I had it for 11/12 years! I'm 21 now and I've dealt with selective mutism as long as I can remember from childhood till now, I wd get in trouble my whole life for being "moody" and not talking when that's not it and didn't know how to explain :( AND NOW THIS! The fact that u're talking aboht it makes everything way easier

me: * was mute for 4 years and not knowing why * me: * a year later * "ah yes..selective mutism! still suffer with that to this day occasionally (i was 6 when i first suffered with it then when i was 10 i found out what it was-)

This is such an interesting topic, thank you for talking about it!

This was really helpful for me because I’m a educational assistant with adhd and gad, so I have a heart for kids with disabilities and kids who won’t get diagnosed till later in life cause I wasn’t diagnosed till 20. I love to learn every way to help every type of child so they can have a positive school experience 💜

the best way i can describe selective mutism is it’s like in certain situations you just can’t talk. not in a way that your body doesn’t work, but in the way that you can’t leave your pants down after leaving a public restroom. it’s like everything in your head is telling you not to speak and it would be incredibly embarrassing and humiliating to do so.

i myself have selective mutism, ive had it for about 14 years now, i can't get over it. ive tried meds and therapy, still doing the meds and therapy until this day. it definitely is something not a lot of people have heard of, i try to explain it to people i trust, and they understand. i have never said a word to most of my family members, which puts a lot more pressure on me. sometimes people don't understand which is then very hard to communicate, my teacher in the second grade didn't understand at all, she would force me to talk when i didn't feel comfortable in class. i love that you can talk about it and open up, im very proud knowing that you got over it!!

Heyyy remember don’t let others hate on you because that’s what mean people do.I love watching your vids and animals

I have adhd and i am personality loving that i can watch bubbles, because it helps me concentrating

I've never experienced selective mutism but I have times that I am semi/non-verbal because I'm autistic. It's interesting to learn more about the similarities and differences between the two. Thank you for another lovely video

I don’t have selective mutism but I have a lot of social anxiety and some of the things you were saying felt familiar to me.. even though I can talk I feel so horrible and closed in around some people and it’s physically impossible for me to break out of it and no one seems to get how I feel

I have a friend with selective mutism and in school the teachers would always try force me to get them to speak to them or see me speaking to them and ask me questions like “how did you get them to speak to you” etc 😑

Thank you for opening up about this. My sister is 17 and currently in treatment for this. She’s had it since she was 10 but when she was 16 we finally started to get answers. She also has autism. Thankfully she speaks to me.. a lot. You Would never have guessed she has selective mutism by the way she yaps on to me haha. But I am so thankful she can talk to me since many of my other family haven’t ever heard her voice in years.

I was unable to talk in school, guys from old times (I'm on 40s now) still remember how quiet I were, they would rarely hear my voice except when I was "forced" by teacher to talk. And I still don't talk about it today, so it's great to see her so young being open about it. Surely it helps lots of young guys out there to feel better ✌

I do love how when you edit you remind past Evie of the words she's forgotten 😂👍 Well done this vid is great, and very informative!

Hey, Evie! Thanks so much for this Q&A and I hope you are feeling better. I once met a 13 y/o girl who had SM and whose family didn’t really understand the condition. They complained she talked just fine at home and only went silent when she was out in public, so they thought she was only doing it for attention. I had vaguely knew about SM at the time so I tried to explain to the family that she might have a condition and that she should probably see a professional. Unfortunately, the family was very proud and didn’t want to seek out help. She was such a sweet girl and she desperately wanted to communicate. We sat together and reading one of her favorite mangas. She wouldn’t say anything to me, but she would laugh and point at a part in the comic she found funny. That was years ago. I hope she doing better now.

Evie popping in with words during editing is the best thing lmao

so proud of you for raising awareness and talking about it

i'm so glad that you make videos and share these things. i have tics and selective mutism as well. growing up i had always felt so alone, or like something was wrong with me and it was somehow my fault that i couldn't do things everyone else so easily could. finding this online community has given me a whole new perspective. there is nothing bad or wrong with me, it's not my fault, and there are so many other people who have the same struggles and feel the same things. i've always had selective mutism but it became really severe when i was around 9 years old. it started with not being able to talk at school, then it pretty quickly turned into not being able to talk in public at all. i couldn't even talk to doctors so getting help was really hard. i spent quite a bit of time in inpatient because of it, because nobody understood what was going on. when i was 17-18, i was going out every day and working really hard to talk to people and expose myself to normal interactions. i got to a point where i could talk pretty much anywhere, even in class. however, being isolated during the pandemic completely destroyed that progress. i think i might even be worse off than i was during inpatient. now even the thought of going to the grocery store is enough to make me panic. because of this, i've been struggling a lot with my self esteem, but seeing this has helped to remind me that it's okay to struggle. hopefully when the pandemic ends i'll be able to make even more progress than before.

I was mute for 10(ish) years and it’s actually so crazy to see other people with sm bc as a kid I rlly thought I was the only one in the world lmao

Thank you for making this video, it was very educating :) A dear friend of mine had selective mutism when he was little. I feel sorry because of how his family made into into a big deal... even if he talked in many situations, it was just with certain people. I think that when a child has an issue with something, communicating to them the message there's "something wrong with them" is terrible, ethically unfair and also not very useful if you want to help them improve. You can accept their difficulties and still encourage them to work on getting better. It's also interesting how in many cases it happens with authority figures like teachers. It makes me think about how if school was different altogheter, with less authoritarian behaviour without a reason, and more individual care and focus on the student, people with struggles, disabilities, mental health issues etc would find it way easier.

My now 6 year old daughter has been a selective mute for just over 2 years, since her 2nd day of preschool. In the beginning she went nearly 3 weeks without even speaking to her dad, sister and myself. Now, she only speaks to me, her dad and her sister, and after 2 years she finally spoke to her gramma and nana which was amazing, and now she uses a notebook to write and communicate with her peers. With therapy and research we have adapted to her mutism, but the hardest thing is family and others that dont understand and keep nagging and trying to guilt her to into speaking, and trying to explain that she isnt just shy that she physically cannot speak.

I’ve had selective mutism all my life, I’m 19 now. I’m mute around everyone except the people I live with. So I’m mute around everyone else including grandparents etc. It makes me physically unable to speak

Awww. The little mushrooms in Bubba's tank are so cute and colourful!🥰

My friend used to have selective mutism. She would only whisper to certain ppl. After loads of work she is very confident with her speaking now. Good for her.

If I try to tell someone that I have/ had selective mutism and am still struggling with speaking in general, they often mishear mutism for autism and start laughing at me. I 5then go on to explain, and they start mocking me, and saying it's in my head because I am comfortable enough to be myself, and speak around them. Thank you for sharing your story, and spreading awareness

I’m very curious if your Tourette’s was affected when you had mutism. As In, did you still have verbal tics at college even though you couldn’t speak or did having mutism suppress your tics for that period of time. I’m just very curious how it affected you dealing with those very opposite conditions at the same time.

Bubba's new house be looking fancy, thanks for talking to us about selective muteism its definitely something that i needed education on.

I can't tell you how much of an eye-opener this video was for me as an educator! Thank you!

I went like a year in 6th grade without speaking to anyone, only my teacher noticed but as soon as she saw my mom and my life she completely understood why, she was so patient even though she didn’t understand completely. I started speaking to my friends the next year again and stopped talking to my mom. Thank you for sharing your story, I never knew this was a thing and I am 27 now.

I'm so happy you exist and you're advocating mental & physical health! You're really helping me and others with our journey❤

My best friend had selective mutism and it was so hard for her to be in certain places/ with certain people. Thank you for helping to spread awareness, I love you 💕

I feel like an asshole for saying this but I never realized fish could be cute or bring you joy like owning a cat or dog. I'm not in a place in which I can take care of a dog or cat but maybe I should get a fish. Yours is really cute

I absolutely love watching Bubba swimming around peacefully while you’re talking, it’s so calming🥰

This was VERY informative. Thank you so much for allowing us a glimpse in to your journey. Also, love those earrings!

thank you for posting this, it will help so many people >3

you’re literally one of my favorite humans to ever exist, you’re heart & soul are so pure and that’s so rare now. i love you

I love you sooo much ! Even when something is tough you still think on the bright side of things! I am not the most optimistic person but you have really helped me become more positive! I know this probably means very little to you as it’s coming from a 11 year old but u have really helped me! ❤️❤️❤️ I love you Evie ❤️

so proud of you for posting this

U make my day so much better, I have a rly painful headache and my tics are acting up a bit more then usual but your videos just completely distract me and ur so positive and lovely 💕💕💕

I had selective mutism in primary school for over 4 years so yeah gurl I feel you, like I didn't even talk to my friends....at all ❤️✨🌸🍓☺️

Evie thank you so much for you content. Since i found you last year ive learned more about myself than i could have ever known. I knew i had problems but they never has names or explanation. I know for a fact I have TS and your videos have helped me explain it to friends,family, and even doctors to help them better understand what I havent been able to. Your FND videos hit me on the head like a nail and now this. I may not actually have it but its like youre telling one of my stories. You truly make so many things in my life make sense to not only me but now to those in my life. Forever grateful for you

you popping in as editing evie was so cute! sending love your way 💗

Very proud of you for posting this, you're so brave ♡

Evie I just want to say thank you…I work with young adults with disabilities and I’m learning new things every day and each thing I learn can be put in to practice…learning about this from your video is such a huge learning curve and I’m so grateful xx

i found your channel and tiktok when i was at a really low time in my life, and your positivity and strength has given me so much inspiration and motivation to keep going

I'm so proud of U for speaking about this! I know its a sensitive subject for u

"I've never spoken about selective mutism before." 😉 Another great video, Evie. Thank you for sharing.

You deserve all the support in the world. Thank you for working so hard to educate and make us laugh 🥰 🦄 ❤🧡💛💚💙💜

I absolutely love how your future (editing) self helps out with the video. It makes the videos so dynamic and adds a comedy element. :) You're a star Evie!

You are just the best person I've ever seen in my whole life,ur cute asf and so generous ,love u Evie❤️

i'm glad i watched this because i never knew about selective mutism and with that i didn't know much about it 💜 thank you 💜

Thank you for posting this I experienced this in the sixth grade and I felt like a freak and I felt like I was faking for some reason. Watching this makes me feel so validated! I hope you have an amazing day. Xx

You are so sweet and you make me feel so calm when i´m listening to you. When i moved to Danmark i had to learn danish language and even when i could understand danish very good and i could say many things, i chose not to talk. I was sitting at school and did not talk at all for like 3 years. I was just shaking head and moving my shoulders i was just not able to speak. I KNOW its not the same thing as you have, but it was a horrible and problematic experience. But remember you are so amazing i´m so happy that you are on the internet and you educate people, there are sure people that are experiencing SM and you are here to support them and its amazing

I started watching your videos about 2 years ago and the first videos i watched i couldn't stop laughing because your so funny and they were so enjoyable but now i realized that i have learned so much and i'm really happy that you came up in my recommendations

Im a total SIMP for this girl and I’m proud ❤️❤️❤️

I love this support❤️ as a person with autism ocd and anxiety it’s very calming to hear somebody speaking out about it

thank you for doing this it means a lot xx the more people talk about it the better

thank you so much for answering my question 🤍 (the one about lunch and breaks)

I’ve got selective mutism, thanks sm for making this video 🥺💗 xx

Thank you so much for continual sharing and spreading the awareness. You are amazing 💙

My love, you have given me so much strength in my life dealing with mental health. I am so in awe of you and your family with how you deal with your diagnosis. I have SOO much respect and love for you.. and we have never met. You are an inspiration... and i know sometimes that can be annoying to hear.. but I love you.

Never clicked faster I love seeing your vids pop up on my screen

I have selective mutism and I'm so happy to find out someone else also had it

You are such a ray of sunshine. You make my day better. Love you!💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓

You're so upbeat and funny dealing with your thing. You are an inspiration to all of us working through our things.When I'm feeling down with my struggle, I watch a couple of your videos and I'm ready to get out in public. Thanks!

I don’t know if you’ll see or even answer this but I want to take the time a moment just to say a thank you for....well being you and for putting your self out there,I’ve been in a very very deep dark hole for a while and could only see one way out,if you get where I’m going with this,and out of the blue one day found your uploads,to keep it short your bubbly personality and sweetness uplifted me and helped me a lot, so bravo and thanx😉👍🏻

The “haaa” tic sounds like hug to me every time and it makes my heart happy hahahahaha

Thank you for making and sharing this video! This year a teacher who I trust told me that maybe I've got Selective Mutism because the last 3-4 years I didn't really speak at school or somewhere else. Since last month I've got extra support at school and she thought about it too. I not really diagnosed yet because my parents don't really know it yet. I'm glad that there are video's like this so I know I'm not alone. Most of the time I really get mad at myself because I sometimes really do wanna say something but I just can't. I hope that more people will learn about it because it's difficult for me to explain it to somebody. I love your videos and your personality !!

It sounds like you had some great support at college. It still makes me want to give 16 year old you a big hug. I have social anxieties and Asperger’s so I do appreciate how you lonely and isolated you felt. Your just awesome 😎 thank you for being you x

I loved the edit parts when you can't remember a word. Those have a really good comedic touch ! Great video overall !

love your hairstyle omg!!

You make the world a happier place. Keep being you because you’re awesome...

Hi, I’ve seen your videos on instagram and ran into this video here on KZfaq. I just want to thank you for this video. I had selective mutism when I was younger. I don’t really see much content around selective mutism, it no longer affects me but it is something close to my heart as it took over most of my childhood. It was really nice hearing your story and feeling “seen”. Thank you so much