“He was a wigger” how’d that go unnoticed I literally cried! 😂😂

Cant believe joey has survived this long😂

“You don’t even need Cosby to show up just let nature do it’s work LMFAO” Joey is a Savage 😂

if he ate 30, 1mg Xanax then he matched my old daily habit. I don't remember a solid three years of my life. Don't do Xanax.

"terry you're not gonna believe this i'm fucked up" i have a feeling she wasn't too surprised

"One guy robbed the other guy, and the other guy hit the first guy in the head with a bamboo stick and that was the end of that" pfft I love how Joey just blows past that story.

"You don't even have to call Bill Cosby"

"So here I am: 400 pounds, sweating profuciosly on stage..."

“Terri, you’re not going to believe this...” 🤣🤣😂 Terri can definitely believe this.

I'm thankful joey diaz lived through all that crazy shit, one of the best story tellers out there

I’m not exaggerating at all, I know this guy who in high school would eat 50 blue Xanax on a Friday night, We could buy them 100 for $100. I saw him passed out at a party once with blue streaks coming out his nose and mouth. His mom was a teacher at same school with my mom so we knew each other for long time. But his dad shot and killed his mom in their house when we were sophomores in high school, so I could understand why he wanted to forget life. He is doin good now believe it or not. Not dead anyways. London Kentucky has many stories like his

Gotta love Uncle Joey he's just got endless stories. He's lived 1,000 lives

Its people like Uncle Joey who are helping young people not go down the same path. I commend him

Joey diaz: blah blah 30 Valium Every addict ever: preach brother 🙏

You know things are getting serious when you start sweating profusiously

Episode 409, ironically thats the area code of Beaumont

"One guy rubbed the other guy and the other guy hit him with the bamboo thing" haha what??!!

Powerful Joey Diaz

QUALLUDES NEED TO MAKE A COMEBACK

I've had so many experiences with valium and xanax.. exactly like he said one minute it's Tuesday then boom !!! Its saturday !!

It was “beiiiiige, it was beiiiiige” LOL

Just hearing this story gave me anxious diarrhea. Hearing him explain the beige blow liquified my bowels Hahahaha

“Tremendous” 😂😂😂everytime I hear it it’s like a switch goes off I loose it lmaoooo

4:58 Uncle Joey was “sweatin profuciously” 😂

I live in Beaumont ....pretty accurate.

I am shocked I haven't heard Joey on a single storytelling podcast. He has so many good ones! I guess he doesn't want to do it, but it would be amazing.

benzo's are fucking ruthless

You don’t even need cosby to show up 😂😂😂 I just fell on the floor laughing

Love the edit at 6:02 He was about to tell on himself.

Sweating profuseciously 😂😂😂

“I already got the 8 ball, it’s fuckin beeeeige” 😂

Benzos benzos benzos.... I cant stress enough how dangerous those damn things are. Not only the drug itself also the fact that you cant pace them like other drugs. One can usually gauge when enough is enough. Not with benzos. You take a couple feeling good then ur thinking I could take another. Then you wake up days later wondering wtf happend and all you have to go on is what's left of your fragmented memory. Had a couple of terrible experiences with them. Completely on auto pilot both times. Friends and other witnesses had to tell me. Talk about a terrible feeling waking up in jail hoping you didn't fuckin accidentally kill someone. It happens. House wives waking up in jail not knowing why they are there until there lawyer comes to talk to them. Come to find out they stabbed their husband 71 times in his sleep. Hahah luckily my experience weren't on that level. Maybe a wreck and a dwi. Now imagine trying to defend oneself when you cant even recall what actually happened. Hahah I can laugh now but sure as hell wasnt when I woke up in a hospital or in jail. Everything is ok in moderation. Not benzos there is no moderation. One cant gauge where the black out line is and ride the wave. You either fall asleep or black out and run around the city making a fool of yourself. Take heed to this comment. Especially young people who might be in the experimental phase. Leave benzos out of it. Especially if your a drinker aswell.

I did a bunch of vals one time at my mates and I woke up the next day at 5:30pm 🤣 my dad had called me a bunch of times and each time I would pick up and he’d tell me we had dinner at 7. Every single time I’d say “yeah I’m coming home now” and then completely forget after about 10 minutes 🤣 when I finally came through, I couldn’t account for the past 2 days of my life

Joey Diaz did drugs? He never mentioned it!

It’s good to see Joey now on the joint. He seems happier and healthier.

For those that don't know... that Slade Ham guy he keeps talking about has his own amazing podcast called the Whiskey Brothers. Check it out its seriously the funniest fucking thing on the internet.

A podcast about joey diaz's crazy stories? Fucking genius

I took Xanax every day for a couple of years with Ambien. When you stop you hear this nonstop ringing sound in your ears for a few days. It's a trip because the sound would change pitch every so often, and I would bust out laughing because it sounded so funny.

Damn, I'm just a few miles up the road. Glad Joey walked outta Beaumont. Especially in those days. Lol

Just hearing about Joey doing all these drugs is giving me an anxiety attack 🤣😂

Joey “400 Pounds and Sweatin’ Profuciously” Diaz

6:03 whoa whoa what happened there? Theres some shit missing Lee!!

Xan-Za-Bar!!! Sheeeesh them bars are no joke son FrFr

Bro I dont care how many times I ask this. How is Joey alive. Not even gonna use a question mark. Almost is even rhetorical. This man is mystic

I would of loved this story if I heard it when I was in my twenties , now that I’m in my late forties ... it just makes me tired lol

I did 60 valiums in a weekend, went to work on Tuesday thinking it was Monday. #bitofamess

Coffee ,coffee shower,erk off that's my Tuesday!

Joey always citing The Longest Yard

"Profusesly"

Called my mom goober after eating oxys

“Cosby doesn’t even have to show up...”🤣

For someone who did so many drugs joey has such a great memory

Blacked out of xans/beer/coke before. Robbed a gas station aswell...We gta talk Joey

I idolize you, used to have blackout benzo experiences like that in college all the time wish I could go back

That little town behind Beaumont tx he talking about is called Nederland my hometown, then it is Port Arthur and that's where UGK Is from

I used to pop roxys and somas, to where u talk all slowmo and cant stop shaking. On the weekend I get loaded at night, as soon as i woke up do it again and by the time it was Monday and is have to slow down a bit, it would feel like the weekend was literally just a dream. All bad

I'm learning more about chemistry than I ever did in high school

Beaumont, Texas. 2005.

When he whispers " im fuckin hammered" hahaha

Joey Diaz is a queens of the Stone Age song

Hows this guy still alive..

This man has to blend his stories together. There's no way you remember one distinct drug situation so much when you did it all the time

It's definitely a life lived, Joey is tops

What were you doing in Beaumont? That's a small show. Glad you have done so well.

I went to rehab for a crazy Heroin addiction, but I failed to mention that I had been taking between 300 and 500mg of Valium a day for the past 2 or 3 years. Big mistake! I was doing it cold turkey and, holy fucking shit, the Heroin was a breeze to come off of compared to the benzos. I was taking fits, having seizures, anxiety attacks that would down an elephant and all sorts of other terribly god awful horrible shit, I genuinely thought I was gonna die. The rehab was in the middle of nowhere, It was a bank holiday weekend and the ferry service was off so they couldn't even drive me to the hospital or call an ambulance. One of the worst experiences of my life.

Definitely bought coke from the brotherhood in vidor

Uncle Joey always has a great story

Saturday-thursdays are always difficult

I did a bottle of 1 mg xans in five minutes ( i know it’s a death sentence) and don’t even remember a week and my family said my skin and eyes where so grey they started planning my funeral

Benzos and booze are the fking worst for memory loss

Man it sucks knowing Joey MFKN Diaz was partying his ass off in Beaumont, Tx. I'm an hour down the road in Lake Charles, Louisiana. I would've definitely partied with Uncle Joey back in the day. I probably would've died but what a way to go.

Beaumont TX is sketchy everywhere now lol. I used to live there and in the surrounding areas.

At the end Bert mentions that benzos are the hardest to detox off of... I've heard that as well. People that came off of years of heavy heroin use saying that the withdrawal from that was a walk in the park compared to the withdrawal they had after only a few months of using Xanax recreationally.

Dude looks like keemstar

Beaumont Texas! I live 30 mins from there, I'm there like every week lol

i was like "where the fuck are bert's eyes, man"

You got a story wait for Joey to interupt to say he did it or did it better.

Love Joey but why does he whisper all his stories?

Diaz is the Osborne of the comedy world

“That was the last memory of that weekend” proceeds to tell the story in great detail lol

Sweating perfushisly crew checking in

I love that his adventures with drugs parallel mine and my best friend's. Only thing I would oppose is that snorting for the first time was a beautiful experience and I've never felt guilty about it.

Out from Saturday to Thursday. Joey musta ate a fucken Trippa Snippa.

Joey is the American dream personified

Did 3 bars of Xanax many moons ago. Forget the whole day except for driving. I remember the beginning of the ride, then I blacked out. I went 5 miles without remembering, then I woke up after hitting a curb going 40 mph through an old parking lot. Careened into a pickup truck, and stalled out in a fuckin junk car lot, where the car was buried, rest in peace. Not a fuckin scratch. Lucky bitch I was.

Been there. In the moment you're like "fuck yeah, this is awesome, constant party" but then you look back on it years later and the only times you really remember are the ODs and the withdrawals - you barely remember the highs or the good times you had or the so called "friends" you made

"Per-cyoo-latin' like a mOTHAfucka!!"

In the beginning of the story Joey mentions Slade Hamm. . hes a comedian from Houston. . i drove limousines in San Antonio for 5 years and met Slade one night. . he was super kool and more real then the headliner Godfrey. . feels kinda kool to be loosely connected.

I’m a white guy, but you gentiles as Joey says crack me up. You think his stories are bullshit because you didn’t grow up around people like this. I grew up in the Bronx and literally know like 5 people like him

When you know about that color and smell you’ve had some good coke haha

Joey is literally Invincible he cant die

"Sweatin' profussessly". Nice

I was addicted to benzos hardcore. Popped xannies all day. Used to love the green Hulks. (2 mg bars) Was prescribed Klonopin for eleven years as well. When it came time to go off benzos I had to go off cold turkey. I absolutely couldn't sleep. I didn't sleep at all for like a week and when I did get sleep it was in the form of micro naps (where your brain is so depleted you pass out during the day without realizing it). That led to an inability to differentiate between dreams and reality. I'd wake up freaking the fuck out bc I thought the dreams were real and happened previous to my passing out (when I did sleep). Also had a grand mal seizure during this time. I've now been off any and all benzos for a year and a half. Took a long ass time and damn near killed me, but I did it. I still have insomnia problems every now and then due to severe anxiety to this day. Stay away from benzos kiddos.

When coughs I can only imagine the lung butter haha 🤤 funny bastard lmao.

He makes Keith Richards go Dayum!

my man drinkin the jager thats my drank

In another realm, drugs are talking about how they tried Joey Diaz once and learned their lesson.

Valium isn't shit.. I took 8 pinks and wasn't feeling. I took 8, 1 milli xanax and woke up in rehab true story

I’ve had some crazy nights at the bars eating Valiums like tic-tacs. I’d wake up the next morning all bruised up, sore as fuck, with my clothes covered in blood and beer stains and not remember anything. Then for the next week your friends are telling you all about the crazy shenanigans you perpetrated on your night of Benzo fueled debauchery.

On episode 409 Beaumont, Tx is the 409