Having a depressed boyfriend or girlfriend is really hard. I feel this heavy weight on my shoulder. I would never ever say these things, but I feel awful because I don't have him to support me and I am not doing well either. Messaging him without him to answer is exhausting. I love him and will not leave his side and I remind him everyday that I am there for him. But I think people around me struggle to understand how draining and exhausting it is and how hard it is to not take it personally.

1. No tough love! Never threaten to leave unless they get 'fixed'. 2.people with depression might pull away, make sure you give them a call / text showing them you are there for them and you care and value them. Keep on them! 3. Try to just listen when they are talking about depression. Avoid making comparisons to your life. 4. It's okay to ask them how they are feeling. Ask for a score on 1-10. They will like that you care enough to ask :) Good luck everybody. X

I need to book an appointment with this lady...

This helped me so much... my girlfriend is depressed and I almost took all the wrong approaches to her

I have no shame: I suffer from anxiety and depression. Several people in my life know and many wouldn't believe me because I am very talkative and a goofball at heart. 😊 Depression has made me a very understanding, empathetic and compassionate person so I get it. I really do. And the times I'm depressed, do I chose to or want to feel crappy and feel like I'm moving slowly in wet concrete? Heck no! And all I need is understanding, hugs and it feels awesome when people in my life call or shoot me a text checking in and telling me that they thought of me and they care. Simple. I don't need a bunch of "you shoulds" or "why don't you just...." No! When I'm in a slump, what do you think goes on in my mind? A bunch of "I need to be strong" "I'm better than this" "this doesn't define me" "if only I had the energy".. I do that to myself more than the average person so most suggestions (even though they come from a good place) don't help. I've been down that checklist 10 times already. The best things my husband did last time I was feeling like crap, lol, was shutting his mouth before that unsolicited advice started oozing out. All he did was look in my eyes which were full of tears and asked "what's wrong?'' '' I don't know but I don't like the way I feel!!'' ::insert tears here:: and he just stopped himself before he started talking, grabbed me, and held me in the most loving, warm hug. My tears stopped a lot quicker than they would have if he started the "you should's".. I pulled through that moment a hell of a lot faster. I was shocked because I'm used to words VS hugs like that. Later on he told me to go get something out of the bathroom and he set up a bubble bath with a candle and a Bluetooth speaker playing some of my favorite music. (this was recent and I could tear up if I think too hard about it) but all I can say is that helped me more than any advice, any pep talk could. Just think, if you were having a really really bad day, what is that one thing that would make you smile and take that deep breath of relief? Besides words? What's something simple you could do specifically for that person? If they love tea, go make them one! Maybe get their favorite blanket and hand them their tea and say "I made this for you, go relax." if they get bad headaches, say "come here, let me rub your upper back and shoulders". You get the gist. You know that person well enough so just ask yourself what you could do for them VS telling them what they should do. What's that one thing you could do for them that you know they wouldn't say no to? For me, I'd never turn down a cup of tea and a bubble bath. :) With that being said, if someone's depression is making you feel helpless and interfering with your day to day life and bringing you down, there is nothing wrong with stepping a few steps back and loving them with a little extra distance. Tell them how you feel in a non threatening way or make them feel like a bad person. Create some healthy space so that it doesn't affect you and still love them if you have it in you. There is nothing wrong with taking care of you so that you can be your best version of you. To me, space doesn't mean "I don't love you". I suffer from depression and I totally understand both sides of the issue. A worn-out lover or caregiver, friend, etc... has to take care of themselves, too and I can't think of any person I know with depression (I've been there) that wants to hurt others or make them feel unappreciated. It's tough and things do get better.. but feeling pressure from within and from others on the outside to just "snap out of it" prolongs the process. Nobody wants to feel depressed. Nobody. It's like having a flat tire and sometimes it doesn't take long to fix and other times it takes a lot more time. I'm a big advocate of getting help as opposed to doing nothing to get back on track. It's not "get out the house, smell the roses while singing zippity doo-da" "go exercise" or "go out for the evening with friends to get your mind off of it". . If someone is depressed and it's gotten to the point where it's affected every part of their life and they haven't done anything to reach out and call a doctor or for some kind of help or seek therapy there's nothing much you can do. Take a step back, love them, tell them you have to get back on track in areas of your own life. There's so much help nowadays. Depression and every other mental health issue has a stigma but what's good is that nowadays people are stepping up and speaking out as opposed to a few years ago. We come across so many people in our day-to-day lives not having a clue that they suffer from some form of mental illness. People master the art of wearing a fake smile. I told my husband if everyone with depression or those who have suffered from clinical depression had to wear a neon green shirt, he'd be shocked at how many people he sees everyday not having a clue that they are depressed. Depression doesn't discriminate. It can happen to anyone. But the most important thing is that we all need to take care of ourselves as best as we can. It can be exhausting for the person suffering as well as their closest people in their lives. And if that means taking a breather and stepping back a few feet, not abandoning them, just take some distance, that is OK! There is nothing to lose by picking up the phone and making an appointment or making a few calls to see what your options are. Help and resources are everywhere regardless if you have health insurance or not. If you're depressed, reach up. There are so many hands reaching down to pull you back up. It can take time but you have nothing to lose. Nothing. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

This is good advice. My girlfriend and I were just absolutely head over heels over one another. One day it was like she fell off a cliff with her attitude. A stark 180 degree turn. It really concerned me, and I suffer from PTSD/depression myself. It has been incredibly tough on me to endure the depression she feels. She originally dumped me, seemingly without any thought behind it. I asked if I could talk to her in person, she said I could, so I went over there and she was just a mess. I held her, asked her why the sudden shift and she thanked me for being there for her and took me back. Everyday, I just remind her that she's a beautiful woman, very strong, and most importantly, even if she feels lonely, she's not alone and that I am there for her. Over the course of a couple of weeks, she's been improving, but what Julia says is in fact what's been going on. I feel like I have to try and fix everything, and she's not receptive to it so I beat myself up, thinking she doesn't appreciate me and doesn't love me. She told me she dumped me because she loved me and hated seeing how miserable she made me. So now, I give her some space (which is incredibly hard to do), and just be supportive. Patience is key. Damn if it isn't a serious test. These 2 part videos just underlined that it's totally a normal thing to feel and to just hang in there. I love this woman to death, and I know she'd do the same if the roles were reversed.

With my experience, my boyfriend said it really helps when I check in on him everyday (during depressed times) because before I thought the best I can do is just let him be & just talk when he's ready, but he said its nice to be reminded that someone cares when it gets bad. - Not sure if that works for everyone, I'm still in the process of figuring out ways that works to be a support for him.

It’s so hard loving someone who hates themselves. It’s so hard. Especially when you have empathy. Whatever he feels I know I don’t feel exactly but I know he’s upset and lost and I just hurt so much knowing he feels that way. It’s so hard. And whatever I say to help I know it won’t, when this battle is with himself and himself alone. I just wake up everyday with the fear he’ll be sad or I’m afraid anything will trigger him into it. It’s so upsetting and it hurts so much.

As someone with pretty severe depression and anxiety, I absolutely love these 2 videos. Everything you are saying is bringing the things I wish people would do together. I don't want to be a burden on my loved ones and I try my best to not be, but its terrifying going day to day like this. I feel like I can't tell the people I care about that I feel awful because I don't want to make them sick of me (this has happened in many of my relationships, not just romantic). Reminding your loved one with depression that you love and care for them, and are there for them, is one of the most important things... Because even if the person says it sometimes , and thinks we know they love us, just about every day, our confidence that we are loved is like a very delicate plant. If you don't care for it (in the human mind's case do that as well as remind that you care for it) then it will wilt and die. We are constantly being told by that little awful voice in our heads that we are a burden, that we are worthless, that the world would be better off not having to deal with us, and that people are going to get sick of us & leave us and we are "never going to find anyone who wont". Its not personal at all. We're like that with everyone. Sorry to anyone who had to deal with reading through this big paragraph, I'm not sure how to condense it I know I talk too much...

I heard something helpful while I’ve been searching for answers. Someone told me “Your boyfriend is sick and he’s gone right now. He’s not the man you fell in love with. He’s been taken over by the illness. He’s not going to care for you the way he once did, or do the things he used to. You just have to be ready to be there for him every day and not get anything in return. He will come back eventually, and when he does, and you’re still by his side, he’ll be forever grateful.” It’s a heavy thing to hear, but it’s how I’ve felt. I needed to know that it’s normal, and there’s a light at the end of this tunnel. Good luck to everyone going through this! Your loved one is so worth the pain you’re going through. Lean on those who can be there for you right now, and you can do it!

I'm having a really hard day right now, and listening to this is helping me so much. Although right now I don't have anyone around who can understand, it's nice to know that there is someone out there who knows.

Thank you so much for this series on caring for people with depression. My girlfriend of nearly 2yrs wanted to take a break the other day. She said she loves me but she needs time. It Our relationship is good- not without its areas of improvement- but we get along well & truly care for each other. I knew she had some depression & anxiety but she shared with me that it's a lot worse than she's shown... I feel there's been some recent triggers in her life including cooling friendships & a betrayal, not to mention she feels inadequate in a lot of ways including her job type & not having a college education. I'm sad that I didn't care for her in the best way for someone with these challenges, but I am hopeful that educating myself on this will help me be a better partner & help our relationship grow- I care for her so much & I know she can do great things in her life. Thank you so for this video- I am a better person for it.

I more and more get the idea that as a partner of a depressed person you kinda want to be with them like a doctor or nurse talks with a patient e.g. in a hospital: they are always friendly and caring but not deeply worried or troubled, have a good energy, are patient, listen interested and are really there with you, are caring but not overbearing, are always there when you need them but don't bother or pressure you. I always felt rather happy when being in a hospital or at the doctor because of this. Of course as a partner you are different than a doctor and much more deeply emotionally involved with your partner!

I can't tell you how much these two videos have just helped me. My beloved just went from perfect for me to questioning everything about us and not knowing if she wanted to be with me, overnight. It took a lot of difficult conversations for her to open up just a little and admit she is depressed and dealing with trauma from a previous relationship that was unhealthy. You've helped me a lot today.

Wish I watched this before breaking up

THANK YOU SO MUCH! Part 1 hit home big time, hence my partner wanting to break up with me when I didn't even do anything wrong. She cried when I told her I'm there to support her and I know this will be a tough gig but I'll show you what real love is. I had to do so much self cares and fill my energy cup up, but had to realise I can only support her. Damn I love this girl ❤️

As someone suffering from depression since childhood I know know that depression might be devastating both for those suffering and those around them. It's just an endless well. The only way to lessen its effects is to find something meaningful other than pitying yourself and focusing on the pain itself. To relieve the pain I focused on something I love doing, which is reading literature, I became an ESL teacher and have been helping people learn English. Even if I easily get back to my depression when I'm not in the classroom, I always look forward to being there again both to relieve the pain and help others grow. No other pills will help you than helping others. Don't forget, we need something meaningful, larger than our suffering.

I just was crying watching your videos about depression. Thank you for the information, my husband has depression I've done many things wrong and I have not understood him completely. This is a really tough to always be there for listening and just absorb negative vibes and reflect positive ones, too hard to be dumped at last minutes in ceremonies and gatherings and not taking it personally. It's not easy to not have sex for weeks and find him masturbating; and not taking it personally. I feel I'm overwhelmed. Now at least I know that many things I was thinking was helpful, actually wasn't. Is there anybody to help us? People whose loved ones suffer from depression and trying to cope with that?

He keeps pushing me away,even tells me to leave the relationship because he doesn't wanna hurt me,but he loves me snd doesn't want let me go either..we're on a break relationship asked by him,but I'm always gonna be there for him no matter what, because I love him and I believe in him that he can get through this..thank you so much for your video,it really helps

my boyfriend is depressed right now and yeah it hurts that i dont get those "Good morning Sweetheart" texts like when he was energetic but he has a lot on his plate and i try to give him space but also i show my love and patience by surprising him with lunch or dinner at work or just simply being available for him whenever. Its not easy and i am afraid of being a headache myself by checking in but at the same time, i dont think he has but 3 of us seeing if hes okay. Because i know for a fact there is only one of me trying to assist him with just making him feel warm and loved. Im sure his son tries too but hes a little boy and he cant swing by at work to drop off food. Its just hard.

Thank you so much for your videos, part one and part two! Been trying to help my loved one for 3 months with this and it's difficult but now I have a better understanding, it means a lot

Bloody hell, you deserve a much larger following! This has massively helped my loved ones understand my disorder so much better, thank you!! :)

Again, thanks for sharing these, Julia! They are really helpful. My best friend is struggling with depression right now and I've been feeling hopeless. Your videos have really helped me. Thank you.

I'm so happy I ran across your videos. THANK YOU for helping me with helping my son with depression. As being a Mom it tears me apart because I know I can't help him. Your words have tremendously helped me !

this is so helpful!!! just got into a relationship with someone. and that person is very depressed and this really helps

Omg you mentioned a term I've been trying to describe my depression and you NAILED it "TRAPPED"!!!! That's exactly how I feel. I hate the fact I can't get out of this turmoil. I shared your video with my friends and adult children. Thank you for understanding us. Blessings

This has helped even if it is almost 4 years later. I think I might even get the person that I'm helping. Thanks a lot Kristina.

Dear Julia, thank you so much for this and the last video about the same topic, I’m currently dealing with my mom’s depression and is really hard; however listening to your advice showed me that helping her is easier than I originally thought and marked a clear path of what I should and shouldn’t say. Thank you for your great labour. ❤️

This is brilliant!!! My Hubble and I have been struggling with this and we need help. You have offered so much insight to how he can help me and how I can help myself and him. This is key 🔑 to any relationship, yet one of the most difficult things to do! Thank you for your knowledge!!! I look forward to sharing it and working the techniques!!!

This professional is a therapeutic angel. Thank you!!!

Omg yeeees! Thak you for making this videos. I have depression and I'm a lot better now that I know how to handle it better. But its really hard to tell people, specially at first, cause pleople usually dont understand it. Its not their fault, but it can hurt a lot to be in a lot of pain and have a love one tell you 'just be more positive and tou will feel better"

Thank you so very much, Julia. I have been searching for how I can speak with my offspring with depression. This is so very helpful. I appreciate the tips and look forward to hearing more. They suffer from depression, ptsd, and anxiety disorder so all of this really helps me to be a better loved one to them.

Thank you for these videos. I am going to post these so my friends understand why I disappear sometimes.

Very well said. I wish everyone could hear this- just because you don’t understand unless you’ve been there.

Love your videos. I have issues with depression and anxiety but also a little codependent on helping others. My ex turned BFF pointed out not everyone loves the same way as me and now that I’m with someone who has depression I’m learning his needs from me while still protecting myself. The way you explain things is so helpful.

These two videos were very useful. I have been looking for something like this for a while now. There are so many videos about how it feels to be depressed but very few about how to support the person who is depressed. Thank you for sharing.

You are literally saving peoples lives keep up the great work

Thank you so much for making these two videos on the topic! My girlfriend is currently going through a very severe episode of depression. This in itself would have been very hard already, but us being long distance and only having been in a relationship for a bit over a month makes this even more challenging. These videos really helped me understand the thought processes behind depression better and also how to be a better and more supportive partner for her. So thanks again for these videos!

Having suffered major depression since a child (am now 47), you are doing everyone a great service with these two videos. One of our best friends os an ob/gyn, and your videos actually changed the way she interacted with her patients. Thank you.

Thank you for this incredibly helpful practical advice, it's a light in the darkness. I now feel better equipped to support my boyfriend, in the best way I can, knowing I'm doing my best and supporting him the way he needs and deserves: the right way

This and your other video are so helpful! Thank you. I've been trying to help out my SO. Trying to figure out what I can do to not make them feel... like their a burden. Like I am a burden. And this is the best information I have found.

It’s crazy how accurate this is.. my boyfriend is going through the same thing and I didn’t know he was depressed until I saw this, thanks for the help

Thanks for these videos. This is vital information! I've dealt with people not knowing how to react to my depression, and they do 1everything except listen and offer support. A lot of the time, they make threats or tell me that I'm lazy, self indulgent, or that I just want to be depressed. They don't realize how hurtful and demoralizing those words can be, especially to someone who is contemplating suicide!

THANK YOU. This hit home big time and has been super helpful.

I really enjoy watching your videos. You are very personable and empathetic, and you give great advice in an open, informative way with zero judgment. You care, and it shows.

Your last tip about checking in emotionally with something like a 1-10 scale is really helpful at times. When my depression get difficult it can feel really suffocating and isolating to not have how I am perceived on the outside match how I feel on the inside. Just knowing that someone knows where I am at and how I am feeling really helps me to not feel alone, but can feel like an impossible feat at times. My loved ones tend to ask "Are you Okay?". When my depression gets bad my emotions get swampy and confusing. When asked if I am "okay" I'll have so many feelings and thoughts come up that it literally paralyzes my ability to speak. So I'll usually take the path of least resistance and say "I'm Fine" or "I don't know, but I'll be okay". For me, giving a 1-10 would feel more clear cut and enable me to get past this blockage in communicating. Thank you for the tip

As a depression survivor I cant thank you enough for you Channel. It is so hard to express my thoughts and actions to my loved ones. Part 1 and part 2 of this video let me share a piece of me that I struggle to explain. You are helping so many people with your youtube channel. I am one of them. Thank you is not enough to express my graditude.

Thank you so much 😊 I suffer from major depression I have been diagnosed. I don’t want to a burden to my love ones. Sent your video to my love ones. Thank you so much 😊.

Thank you so much Julia, i understand the problem and illness of depression better

thank u so much for both videos on this. I'm going through this with my fiance we have 3 beautiful kids 1 Boy 2 girls. and this is very insightful I always thought I was helping and the whole time I was only making it worse. it is definitely hard the hardest thing I ever had to deal with but I will not give up

Thanks so much for posting this. I have a depression and I’m struggling with it everyday secretly bc of my fear to tell somebody thinking what if i told them I wouldn’t understand me anyway so I pretend everything is fine and i fake smile :( .... anyway thanks for uploading this this is such a helpful video for me cuz it makes me feel like i’m not alone :)

Can't believe this video was uploaded 8yrs ago and you are still uploading new videos! Amazing work 👏 🎉

This was so helpful... thanks for sharing as trying to understand the how to help not hurt is what i think one of the biggest challenges those that love try to work through. We never know how much is too much, when to step back vs when to swoop in etc. it's so tricky and i'm thankful for the sites that address these questions and concerns. Ambiguous is not a good place to be when you are trying to help in just the right way!

I'm endlessly grateful for this. Thank you

Wow thank you so much I needed this video dealing with a loved one with depression

Thank you SO MUCH for this valuable insight. It really helps me a lot for my special friend.

Thank you for these videos! I know they were uploaded a while back, but I needed them today and I found them.

Really thx for this video it helped me a lot. I have a new gf and i was really messed up because i always thought she just doesnt want to see me or something whenever she was depressed. I hope i can understand her better now and help her through this.

I just want to learn to be able to help and support them in a way that is right for them I want to be the person they can confide in and just realize they aren’t alone and have that option.

This is truly helpful I'm dealing with a relationship that is exactly like this. I'm trying hard I do believe. ✊

this was really helpful out of all the videos i have watched, thank you so so much

I didn't realize I was depressed until I was having a panic attack for the third time in my life . I was trying to calm down and I found these videos and every single aspect of what you are saying is how I have been feeling. I am enlightened thank you so much.

Thank you. I have been looking to help understand my depression for my husband. He needs help, just as much as I need it.

I've watched some videos from other people talking about how to help someone with depression but I keep coming back to watch this one and the first part. They're the most helpful for me. I like how you speak in a calm voice and the things you mention help me a lot. Specially the part about not blaming ourselves, how we can't cause the depression and we also can't cure it, we can only be there and try to understand. Thank you very much for your videos!

My 17 yo girlfriend is dealing with depression and has been for a long time now. She's tried to commit suicide in the past before a few times but I wasn't part of her life that time n I wish I was. She lives 3 hours away from and she comes to see me whenever she gets the chance cause she told me that I'm her only happiness and stuff. When she gets into her depressed episodes, I can't even hold her and whisper sweet things in her ear to make her feel better... this makes me feel so damn helpless. What makes me feel even more helpless is that she tells me that she doesn't think she'll make it a year... she's over there and I'm here and she can easily just go somewhere n end it n i can't do anything. I love her so damn much and I just cry thinking about one day she'll finally decide to end it n I just don't know what to do I just need her to be in my life cause she's the only thing that makes me happy in this damn cruel world n I also suffer from anxiety which makes my feelings feel way worse n worse and I can't tell her cause I don't want her to feel bad. She doesn't wanna tell me these things cause she doesn't wanna hurt me but she does anyways cause I want her too n sometimes it breaks my heart so much I can't even stop crying to the point I'm choking n can't breathe. How am I supposed to deal with this and support my girlfriend? The feelings overwhelm me so much n I'm so afraid to lose her I just can't lose her... this may not sound as bad as all the other comments but to me it's so heartbreaking and it hurts so damn much and her depression is bad and I can't really explain it well n I can't explain anything well cause of my anxiety. I hope someone takes the time to read this n understands. She changed my life n I don't need her to change it again... just not like that... 😔

Thank you so much for doing these videos!

Thank you so much, I really needed this 💗💗💗

Watched part 1 and 2. I feel like I broke a lot of these "don'ts". but like you said, I do have good intentions with everything i do for my spouse. I'm only trying to help... Thank you for these videos.

For me the most difficult part is seeing how happy he pretends to be towards other people. My boyfriend says he doesn't know if he wants to be with me anymore and feels incredibly guilty. Yesterday he cancelled on our dinner, I visit the place where he lives for just a quick second to see if he's doing okay and I find him having a jol with friends. I know he puts up a mask and I should feel happy that he can put his mind on something else, but it's so exhausting. I'm tired, but I don't want to give up.

I just finished the part 1 of this video and I'm glad I found this part 2. I am here to help myself on how to deal with the depression of my boyfriend. Thank you so much for your tips. This video is very helpful.

Thank you so much for these videos. Really helpful!

Thank you for this video. First of all, it made me really happy that I already used to act correctly and proper. It's good to know that I am doing something right. Secondly, I've been getting really sad recently. I've been dumped a couple of times and when my girlfriend is trying to escape I constantly fear she'll leave me. Knowing that she still might care is a big help. So once again, thank you very much.

Again thank you for the advice this was also very helpful your awesome please keep making these helpful videos.

I was doing all the things i wasn´t supposed to do, this is very helpful.

Love this. Bc I feel like I can never let myself be in a relationship bc I really don't want to be a burden to one whom I would love. Seeing that ppl TRY to understand is.. kinda reassuring. Even if only a little.

Thanks for part 2! You are a kind person. : )

Hi I am Darren and I have Bi Polar with Depression and I liked your video ty for understanding it

thank you so much your part one and part two were really helpfull

My bf just broke up with me few days away, he told me he hasn't been feeling ok and I noticed it (I had clinical depression). I feel so sad because he thinks he doesn't deserve me, that I can get someone better, he can't see how much he's worth it 💔

Thank you, helps so much. I have a friend i really like whos depressed. This helps me understand better.

Thank you so much for these videos. I feel like these tips will help me In the situation that's going on right now. I will definitely try these methods as I see I might have been saying the wrong things...

This really helped. I know they can get through it

Thank you so much for these videos!!!

Really really needed to hear ❤ thankyou so much

Thank you ♥️ you’re amazing!

thank you so much for both of these video, i wished i saw this yesterday!

Thank you!!! This is life saving info

Thank you so much to let us know how to deal with this, we should have courses in school or similar, like Finland does with bullies by making them feel what they feel in a way. We have no idea most of the time on how to act or what to say and this is really helpful. I find it hard not to try to fix it because you care :( non-being over empathic, etc. Everything you say makes sense

Thank you very much for this video. It really helps me a lot.

Thank you for sharing. You are a gem.

These videos are very helpful to me. My wife of 2 years is newly diagnosed with depression and anxiety, and it's been about 6 months since diagnosed. This has been hard for both of us. I can't relate to it and it's hard to be there for her not knowing how to support her. She's in a dark place now and is struggling loving herself and me, to the point where she knows she loves me but doesn't feel in love. Being human this was extremely hard to hear and it's comforting knowing how to act and how to love and support her. It's beyond wonderful to learn how tone better for her and myself going forward combatting my wife's depression.

Thank you so much for these videos. My boyfriend of 6 months has depression but he's already on antidepressants... when we met he was just this amazing beacon of light in my life and so loving and caring, everything was so happy even though I was going through a really hard time myself. Since December... now he barely responds, and doesn't even know if he has feelings for me any more. He said he thinks he does, but he doesn't feel it very much. He doesn't say anything nice to me, and just says thank you when I compliment him. He's like a robot. I love him so much and I am breaking because I don't want to lose him. He said he prefers to be alone, and feels bad that he prefers to be alone. I can feel my heart breaking slowly, that he is probably going to dump me and push me away, and it's making me depressed too and on the verge of tears the last week or so, I can't help him and he won't get help. He just buries himself in work and sleeps all the time. We live a few towns apart as well, so I can't easily go to him and vice versa.

Thank you for this video, you are truly amazing!

It’s hard to listen to a loved one with depression when they don’t wanna be heard or talk about anything. Is it common for someone with depression not to show affection in a relationship?

Very insightful. thank you!

Thank you for this video. I have battled Bipolar disorder everyday of my life. I had my 58th birthday June 2019. I miss me so much.. But I know that my loved ones miss me more when I go away.

Is there any way I can add Korean caption to this? I am struggling with depression and I want to show both of ur part one and two videos to my parents in Korea. They don't know about depression very well and can say things that make me feel REALLY WORSE. But it is hard for me to address them. I think showing this video will help us A LOT understand each other. There are not as many videos about depression in Korea that they can watch because people don't talk about it....

Thank you so much for the insight its helped me better understand my loved one sooo much better

My fiancé suffers from depression and sometimes it can be hard. It's always hard seeing her in pain and right now I feel like she doesn't want me anymore. It feels like she hates me. But, as much as it feels that way and as much as it hurts, I'm pretty sure she does want me and I think she probably loves me very much. I'm pretty sure it's just the depression. One way to help (probably one of the most difficult ways) is some very well-reassured distance. I'm trying to give her some space to sort of do what she needs to do so she doesn't feel the responsibility to make me feel loved when she's really not feeling anything at all. For anything. That's got to be hard on her, trying to maintain my feelings when she's got none herself. When she gets really dark, it's more numbness and apathy than anything. I think. So, I'm trying to let her have some space while reminding her that I really do love her and that I'm right here if and when she needs me. And following through. Listening well when she does express how she's feeling. Checking in on how she's feeling on a daily basis, sometimes a couple times a day. If she calls me at midnight saying she didn't get a chance to get food at work (she's a PCT on late night shifts) I'll make sure I get there with food. And a kiss and a good, long hug and then I'm off into the night.... No judgement, no questions. (She doesn't abuse this either). I told her last week that in lieu of our daily phone call on her way to work, if some days she just needs to rock out with music at ful-blast to get her head right for work, let me know and we can just text later. It can get really difficult sometimes because it's perfectly human to start to think maybe this depressed person you're with actually hates you. Trust me.... I know. The chances are, they don't and they really do appreciate your patience and understanding.

as one who deals with depression,this woman offers good advice for dealing with love ones who has depression