I think the biggest issue for men is summary is to submit themselves to Christ first. If you can't submit to Christ's headship how are you going to lead your wife? Through a man's unsubmissive behavior, he desires Christs headship which is above his own. When we look at Christ's leadership, like Preston was saying, He submitted his authority and power out of love for us. So if you're a guy, learn how to submit to Christ, learn the characteristics of Christs leadership in your life, submit your authority and power out of love for your wife, and lead from that posture.

Please don’t ever think this podcast isn’t doing WORK because it 100% is. Jackie can speak about the things in my heart so well and Preston helps me see the ways that marriage is hard for my husband. Can’t thank y’all enough ❤ y’all are my therapist(s) 😂

I’m glad I have access to this while single. Thank you guys so much for this!!. God bless y’all

“Most of us are regular faced” 😂🤣😂 I felt that!

Im so happy I'm.not a man because being the Head is a huge responsibility. Your wife and kids life is literally in their hands, Dominance/Headship is actually a humble role.

This is why it is SO IMPORTANT to be careful who you marry. You have to make sure that you talk about as much as humanly possible regarding a wide variety of issues that you are going to encounter over the next 50 years.

“Your sins are in the sea of forgiveness… but I swim in them some times.” 😂😂😂😂😂😂

Lol I’m with Jackie but I wouldn’t say aggressive. I like assertiveness. Let me know what it is and stand in it! Say it with your whole chest…ya know. I love y’all talks, it feeds my soul.

“It’s exhausting to always have our sins put before us. Relaxing and becoming a safer space leads to trust” Not the exact quote but this is so real and can be applied to all of our relationships with others.

You really have to be “whole enough” and healed enough, confident in the lord and your identity enough… to trust and submit to the lords model of submission as a woman, and proper headship as the man. Ultimately the Holy Spirit gone check both to keep them in their perspective roles. Humility is key. Excellent conversation as always 😊

Preston, Jackie's look is that "That's my man!" look. 😆

This is where we make the distinction between aggressive and assertive. I like an assertive man when leading me!!

Great convo! My husband is the leader but I handle certain things. We consult each other before making big decisions but if we disagree on something and can’t compromise (which is rare) he makes the final decision. He makes it easier to submit because he is an awesome husband. I say EASIER not easy because the sinful side of me wants to run the show at all times lol

Submission is one thing I struggled real hard with. At first you couldn’t tell me nothing, I never wanted to submit but i prayed to God to soften my heart. I’m still learning to put it in a practical sense

Why am I smiling for 30 minutes like a full blown idiot? The Perrys are bomb. Mat God bless your home.

So good. This is a convo to have before marriage. So much strife would not exist. Whew. Grateful my husband and I figured it out over time. But that was 5 years in! This topic is such a perspective changer.

“Being humble enough to meet them where they are.” That’s good Preston! 👏🏾 I’m learning to not force my husband to talk when I’m ready but when he’s ready. Thank you both for sharing this

I love ya'll's theological wrestling as much as I love the free flowing banter! Thank you for blessing us

As someone who’s currently engaged and has endured long time exposure to the toxicity of my parents’ divorce, I can’t even begin to tell y’all how much this episode means to me. Only God knows how much this podcast has blessed my life. I appreciate the way in which y’all never beat around the bush. It was edifying, convicting and encouraging as per usual. May God continue to bless y’all. Patiently waiting for part 2.

Respect to Preston 👏🏾. Your voice needs to be heard EVERYWHERE. homes, businesses, Hollywood. May God open the necessary doors.

I grew up without a father and didn’t see healthy, affirming examples of manhood until I became an adult, which is pretty recent. I watched the lives of the most important women in my life be made worse on every level from submitting to faulty men. My biggest gripe when it comes down to this convo is that not much grace & reasoning are given to women who don’t want to submit or do want to, but have perspectives similar to mine. I don’t want to lose my identity in marriage and I fear submitting to the wrong man. I appreciate the way y’all framed this convo & I look forward to part 2!

As a single, I looked forward to submitting to my husband because that was something I didn't see modeled by my mother in my upbringing. Fast forward to now being 10yrs into marriage. It's challenging to submit to a man who isn't submitted to God. It makes a difference.

Jackie helps me articulate my heart in a way I didn't know possible. I love their relationship, banter, and flow.

If this how yall talk on a regular basis… yall are great at conversation

“Your sins are in the sea of forgiveness but I swim in them sometimes.” That’s understanding actual forgiveness but our human nature in holding onto things. That’s a real struggle. Thank you so much for the grace y’all consistently show each other and the transparency you choose to have with others.

Just wanted to say, God blesses me sooo much through y’all’s marriage/ministry. I love you guys and I’m praying the Holy Spirit continues to empower you to talk through these things. It’s healing generations❤️‍🔥

Ya'll betta talk good saints!!! This wisdom and real conversation is so needed for our generation!

Not just a lion but a lamb! That’s good. I love the perspective of reality that culture equates a personality trait passivity or authoritative.

This is beautiful Preston and Jackie, you guys are helping me to understand my husband and myself better.

You two look great, rested, and are just such a blessing. What a start to Season 5!

This is definitely a preacher/pastor’s 30 minutes. 😂, I love you guys and your conversations are always full of wisdom and freshness.☺️

I was laughing WITH y’all when Preston kept saying things wrong. 😂 It really feels like we’re in you guys’ living room just hearing your hearts. Love you guys, God bless! From, Miami FL. 🤍

Such a good convo! Seen too many women be upset with scripture/leave the faith due to having horrific examples of Godly headship that has been corrupted with worldly male dominance. And I’ve also seen way too many men commanding submission from women that they aren’t even married to, and worst yet they aren’t even saved / aren’t submitting to God first. More people need to see this!

@WiththePerrys Thank you for this dialogue! My wife felt I am/was a jerk, critical, unloving, unlistening for years. I'm one of THOSE MEN that just want to lead well. I WAS DISCOURAGED by the way my wife wasnt submitting to me or simply being nice/non-petty towards me. She states that Im narcissistic and passive aggressive, but believe she's simply looking at a mirror and seeing her actions but then putting my face on it instead of adjusting her behavior. I WILL say PRAYER DOES WORK! There has been much improvement, but still there are times when she'll be upset and telling I cause drama when I literally and calmly asked one question. I serve and follow Christ and want my wife to join me instead of doing her OWN thing with Jesus. When y'all saud "If you dont feel vulnerable often, then you atent leading as Christ" I felt that! It IS SO HARD to keep being vulnerable...whew thank you... lol maybe too much sharing, but I truly appreciated this recording so IT WAS NECESSARY to comment.

Yes Jackie he said “stifling” correctly ! It was funny when he called you out about correcting him. I could see how “muffle” would also work in the place of “muzzle”. Love this! 😂😊

This was excellent truths that will benefit all men, women, married and wanting to be married. The humor is the cherry on top🤣! Jackie is a comedian and doesn’t even know it! Or maybe she does😂

Such a divinely beautiful conversation!

The idea of submission, coming from the Nigerian culture, was akin to "slavery". To begin with, the girl child was viewed as subpar - she added no value to the family since she would be married off someday anyway. Women were told not to buy expensive cars, or live in comfortable homes in good neighborhoods because that would deter suitors. Even in church, women were taught that submission meant if you had a higher paying job than your husband, you would do well to leave that job for one that paid less than what your husband earned. There are many stories of men telling their wives to quit their jobs because the pay was too high, it would make a wife proud and less submissive. So, even though as a believer I understood what true submission in marriage through Christ was, I rebelled against it because of what it would mean to my life, being a Nigerian.

Sooooo excited that season 5 is already here 💃🏾💃🏾💃🏾 thought I'd have to wait longer...lol Thank you to the Perry's for pouring out your heart.

I LOVE the way Preston put everything. What a wise perspective 💯

To whoever is reading this keep going, you’re doing fine! No matter how slow your progress, each new week is filled with tiny steps forward. Be proud of yourself you got this.

The degree of transparency in this discussion is so encouraging! Minister Jackie you ask great questions and Minister Preston your accessibility and willingness to give a Man's perspective from the natural to a Christ-centered approach.

The only podcast that I’ve listen to that talks about “equal submission”. God my god, thank you!

"When he sees Eve, he sees someone who he can love and fulfill the will for his life" 👏 yaass Pres. Say that!

Absolutely LOVE 30min with the Perry’s. PLEASEEE post more often🙏🏼🤩 both of you have so much wisdom to share !!

Yess to what you said about what a leader is and also so true …I think men forget or don’t realise that for a woman to submit and trust she first had to feel safe which means the man has to put in effort to be that kind of leader - a loving one. It’s much easier to follow someone when you know that they are also thinking about your well-being and not just their own and are adaptable and open.

I love the genuine authenticity of this conversation! Very cool! Y’all talk about things we should talk about more in church, in families, in marriages, and among friends. ❤

Trust! When he said that- I was like ahhhhh- That’s the key- make sure you trust your partner or spouse. Also, having that safe place in a person is so important ❤part II please!!!😊

"Whatever With The Perry's" ABBA Is building a tremendous depth of understanding in Our Young People... You both have come a very long way. YISSIAH is doing a marvelous work in You Both through Your family. I must say that this is part of the great loss we suffered as a Hebrew People when we became Slaves... The things that Abba Yah gave us in His Laws, statutes, and commandments, (TORAH) along with the wisdom and understanding of our elders and Ancestors, was lost in the chain of development that Our YAH instituted as our guidance. The effects of our separation from knowing who we truly are as a People, has bankrupted our lives in ways that has devastated our culture as a Hebrew and ISRAELITE Community, in a massive way. I have found you both and your family again,,, it is quite wonderful. I was qurious, about how YAH would grow Jackie when He allowed her to birth a son,,, I saw that there would be great nuggets there... But to see how YAH is growing Preston and developing his custodianship over his family and mentees is amazing. I am convinced, that the story of your family is indeed a declaration of YAH'S Grace and blessing towards all People, both Straight and LGBTQ People who do not yet know OUR ABBA YAH. I have said in the past, that molestation of our young people is driving the growth of the LGBTQ community. Some People with conflicted genitalia are a special People who YAH has made for Himself. Anyone between these poles,,, Yah can and will restore to Himself and grant an amazing life of testimony of His GRACE.... May ABBA'S Name be Lifted High in Praise and ADORATION for His love and Wonderful Salvation Plan In YISSIAH The CHRIST,,, now and Forever More. We LOVE 💕💕💕 YOU LORD YAH and YISSIAH whom You Have Sent... Amen. May all LGBTQ People,,, Call upon the Lord while He is Near... He will hear YOU.

This was so convicting, and I definitely look forward to part two when it comes. I was most convicted by how Preston says he was early on in his marriage. I heard him describing me, help Holy Spirit

Both spouses are to submit. Eph 5:21 KJV. However, we as wives are to submit to a husband that submissive to God. Wonderful conversations between the two of you and I love these discussions.

It's how real and sincere you guys are for me 😂 feels like a safe zone ❤ where we share, laugh, and get healed 😊.

Whoa whoa Ms Jackie said “Submission is going to come against what YOU (selfishly) want and what you wanna do” 😰 I felt that

What an Honor to be a Patreon member👏🏾

Preston doesn’t understand how key this was for me, it’s hard to find brothers that will open up in such a vulnerable Christlike way, this was more than a blessing, it was a necessity

I love y’all’s transparency!! This is such a blessing to my 36yrold single Christian life😊. Thank you for letting the Father use you all❤

Gosh this is so good. I felt the fear of the Lord for any man who practices Christlike headship. Beautiful conversation and exchange Mr. & Mrs. Perry! :)

Just a really all around great episode. Preston did a great job at breaking down headship and how we as men can do better. I love the balance between you two 🙌🏾

Y’all don’t imagine how helpful this video was ❤

I know I don’t know yall but I enjoy getting a glimpse into your marriage because it’s so beautiful to hear some of the rawness

"A good leader is one who recognize the strength of those he's leading". That's powerful & although brother Preston said that, I believe this applies to every aspect of our life pertaining to leadership. I see so many pastors take the arrogant stand of feeling they have to be in control of everything pertaining to the church (the departments). Many of them I think are threatened by some of their members (one that may have a particular gift) because they are not secure with themselves, which causes them to lord over the congregation. I believe churches are failing horribly due to this. A good leader understands that one with a gift/talent can be utilized to make the ministry, company etc better.

I think Preston is good at using semantics in a way that is tactful and disarming to women who struggle with submission. I think according to his analogy with the district manager though it would be unwise to hand over Authority blindly if you are in charge. Don’t get me wrong you can receive your wife’s counsel but you better put some thought into it less you be reprimanded by YOUR boss if it goes wrong…

I have been watching you since I rededicated my life to Christ. I am 51 years old and I enjoy every video. You guys have some common sense. I see God glory leading your ministries. You are treasures to my soul. I watch you all the time.

That vulnerability portion had me in my feels. Thank you.

I'm glad I kept listening. The 'wow' moment came when Brother Preston said "true Christian headship is just as scary as submission"... incredible!

Awesome episode but the part that made me want to comment was “fladgulence” 😂😂😂

Thank you for the conversation. I learned an important thing that I knew, but did not know could be applied broadly. When they talk about what is historically true, i realized they are falling into the same trap modern people fall into about modern day relationship. Historically, there were bad men, good men, bad women, amd good women. Who are you choosing to focus on? If you think men are historically bad, then you will focus on all the bad men and that will be your model of men.

Thank you two for being obedient to the Lord in your ministry (and marriage) and for being transparent about your journey! So many nuggets of wisdom dropped here!!

Headship is indicative of authority. We all have a headship given to us, in loving God above all things. This is the first and greatest commandment. When we make this the focus, everything else is worked out.

The way Preston breaks it down, does it for me!!👏🏾👍🏾💯

The district manager example is spot on. Beautifully stated!

Thank you all for your transparency and your diligence to continue to Love the Lord and each other.

Y'all get it right as unto The Lord! This is so beneficial and helpful for so many! Order under Christ is paramount to any other function in life. Once we understand and apply that everything else can align. Good talk/discussion.

We thank GOD for you both and for this amazing conversation. GOD bless you and guide you in all your ways!

Jackie is cracking jokes and only chuckles while I laugh for a minute😂, thank u guys this is informative ❤

First time commenting but not my first time listening… just wanted to say say I enoyed all this! And even as a woman it helps me understand a few things that my husband may be experiencing and not sharing with me. Side notes: truly enjoy the jokes and laughter moments 🤭❤

This is soooo good. I wish more men understood this. Preston, thank you so much for this. Everything that you said blessed my whole life. God bless both of you. Oh, and Jackie you are a natural beauty.

Oh my gosh you called him out on his flatulence. 🤣 Terrible but funny. Thank you both for sharing. I'm going to ask my husband to listen to this podcast. We both need to grow.

Minister Jackie "It's in the sea of forgetfulness.... which I sometimes swim in" 😆 🤣 😂 😹

Such a great discussion on such a challenging topic. A total tangent, but I think this is the first time I’ve seen Preston without a hat on 😂

39:32 🤣🤣 I heard the snort! Jackie's "I'm here to help" took me out lol. That's our job! To be a helpmate to our husbands. 💜💜 Love you guys!!

Love the visible growth, love, and wisdom God surrounds you with.

This podcast is such a blessing!

I love this podcast so much seeing how real and raw you guys are is just so inspiring and needed for new believers to see that there are different representation of Christians and also how your guy’s marriage just is it’s so inspiring

Whew!!!! This is going to help my marriage so much. My husband sent this link to me and we both receive this message. It was deep on so many levels. I definitely subscribed to the channel because wisdom like this is refreshing. I have work to do! Thank you both!

I love seeing REAL relatable Christian couples

This is the best conversation Ive heard on this topic….. SO SO GOOD

If you wanna talk about a man having power but understanding the strengths of a woman, Judges 4 is a great story. Barak and Deborah is an amazing take on a lot of these topics. God bless!

I loved this conversation so much. I love your banter I between deep biblical principles for life. I'm single but in prep for relationship in general this blessed me.

The “muffling” though…. I was really tying to dig into it at first and was cracking up when Jackie was like “um…do you mean…” . 🤓🤣🤣 for real though, this is SO good. There is a series called “A Beautiful Design” that Matt Chandler does…when he speaks on this part about headship and men/women roles, it is very clear and helped me “get it”! So hearing y’all discuss this topic, I totally get it and really appreciate the acknowledgment about how this continues to play out in our current culture…it seems tough to help people grasp, so I’m happy to hear y’all speaking on it. I value your perspective and teaching! 🙌🏾 One thing is for sure…God does not change! His design is His design and he BEEN spelled it out for us.

Thanks for having this convo, guys! ❤

Everything y’all say is so powerful & relatable! I thank the Lord for y’all & this platform. 🙏🏾💗

Oh my goodness, I love listening to you two. And I just love how deep in the word you are. I recently got married (well we have been married for 3 years now) and I struggle with the whole submission thing, because of what I have seen in the church and also society I guess. I am even afraid of letting God teach me on the matter because I think there's a part of me that feels like submission favors the man. I am quite immature when it comes to the subject but I am married! Lord help me. lol. And I sometimes avoid Gods true teaching. Thats the Holy Spirits prompting. Please pray for me saints.

Preston painted a beautiful picture of what true headship is, it's sacrifice, sin did mess up all things, and when man fell he became less of who he is and more of who is isn't.

Yayyy!!! Y’all back!!! Don’t ever leave me that long again 😩😩🤣🤣

Thanks so much Preston and Jackie. Very inspiring and funny too. Jackie was all out to make us laugh this time around. Well done and God bless ❤

30:39 im 19 on my journey learning everyday and this is very eye opening and such a powerful episode 🙏🏾

Thank you for doing this podcast. I recently discovered your podcast after listening to better together. I belong to a Kingdom community, and it is a healthy and I thank God every day for my senior elders and the integrity of their walk before and with God. But I tell you it is beautiful to see and listen to you. I am married, and I am still learning about being a wife to my husband. So, thank you for your honest sharing and the transpercy with which you share, and you guys are so adorable correct together.

This blessed me SOOOOOOO good bc of the level of honesty shared by both of you, especially Preston as a man talking about headship and doing it God’s way. The dominate talk often in marriage is about women and submission but THIS RIGHT HERE !!!!!!!!! 🔥🔥🔥🔥 thank you both. Sharing this episode and the one on submission to my marriage group.

What an intimate conversation. A lot of great stuff said. That’s being said Jackie said how it’s exhausting to always have out sins out before us and how it is nice to be able to make and mistake without being reminded of it immediately and then proceeds to call him out on mistakes immediately and then states this is problem that he has to address about her calling him out about correcting him out loud. I wonder if they see that?