I've used the book daily for three years, but it's been vastly unhelpful.

@@RichLuciano1 what are some situations you've used the book to try and help you where it failed? What techniques did you attempt to use, what was the expected vs. real outcome?

@@mechaflash1352 For the sake of brevity here are a few of the results from using Never Split the Difference. Chapter 2's mirroring is something we all do naturally. However, the book could lead people to believe it works better than we know from experience. Many times when we repeat a few key words we've just heard, we are essentially asking them a Yes focused question. Therefore, it's often answered with a Yes or a Yes and they keep right on talking without unpacking any of those words for us. Then, have to drop it as our counterpart assumes we already know what he/she means or we have to recover our fumbled attempt to mirror by asking What do you mean by x? Counterpart: Blah, blah, blah, X, Y, Z. You: X, Y, Z? Counterpart: Yep. Blah, blah, blah. You: What do you mean by X, Y, Z? Then, they'll unpack that for us. Mirrors alone fail greater than 50% of the time because it, potentially, is a getting to Yes strategy similar to Yes momentum. This is important because getting to Yes strategies are not trustworthy as Voss can affirm. People who are friends will probably make fun of you after they hear you uptalk during your mirrors as would happen to me. The high pitch in your voice that used to be taken for a question can become a point of mockery. It sounds egocentric to be sharing about my immersion into labels. I had a superior that negative labels didn't work well on. He would affirm them. I, also, had a friend that could label himself with negatives better than anyone I've ever met. However, it didn't seem to work on me very well. Therefore, it's hard to see the value in negative labels when experience tells me they aren't very helpful. Did they work half of the time unbeknownst to me? Chapter 4's You're right Vs. That's right is something useful. This chapter implies that we ought to take hearing You're right as a subtle F you. What should be known to Voss (but seems otherwise) is that you can trigger a subtle epiphany in someone and hear You're right! However, years before I discovered this book, people would often call asking for help with all kinds of personal and professional relationships. At some point durring our chats the person talking to me would enthusiastically say You're right! This book confirmed that You're right was a failure for us. Long story short that, like Voss, I also took it as a bad sign. When I heard You're right (even when read it in a text) I assumed they will do nothing with whatever counsel was given to them. That's right means they've decided to go with your train of thought, but they're confident that they're now in control of the situation as if it was their idea all the whole time. You do not have to take my word for it, but what Voss teaches us about you're right and that's right, is right! Chapter 5 boasts its Email Magic (i.e., Have you given up of this project?) ensures you will not be ignored again. Unfortunately it only works half of the time, and it never advanced our main goal in our negations. If you are trying to provoke a reply there are plenty of ways to do this. If you're trying to gain anything positive with Have You Given Up On... it seems like it yeilds nothing great. It might have helped when I told someone to email thier friend whom went silent with Have you given up on being friends? I thought I could give you very accurate numbers of its success rate but there are just too many failures to look up. Regardless of its use in texts, email subject lines, the body of emails, and those annoying contact us pages, it looks like it worked at least 10% of the time in my personal experience. Naturally, this means they have given up when they don't reply. Like most of this book, it's not bad advice, but like most of this book, its effectiveness is oversold. I'm sorry for keeping bad stats. I didn't expect so many bad results. You can test this on KZfaq right now. Have you considered asking the "have you given up on (this project)" line with a commentor in your YT inbox who has dropped off from sending you replies? How acceptable is this?

@@RichLuciano1 this is actually a lot of good insight and thank you for taking the time to respond with such detail. Do you think the failure rates you experience are strictly because of how the methods are being deployed or that they may be due to generational differences?

@@mechaflash1352 although it's usually with old heads, there's too wide of a range for age to feel generational. What made you ask?

David DAN wish I could like more than once

Please and Thank you

Yeah no

Joe Rogan is overated

Yessss!

1:13:38 1:13:38

What was helpful, and how would you have done those parts differently before gaining his help?

You got that right!! 👍

@@RichLuciano1 Read the book my friend. You won't be able to put it down. Phenomenal! 😊

@@lindasedberry8853been there; don't that; got the t-shirt; lost the shirt off my back. Not a phenomenally effective book.

Have you given up on telling us how he helped you get to an A?

Did you quit?

@@Jolt917 no, I got a raise and promotion at my insistence

@@Jolt917 I also paved the way for a profit partnership with them on a product I have been working on for years.

So how did you overcome the resentment you built up being tooled and underpaid by a a company that you believed in but was taking you for granted using Chris’ technique?

You must have insisted in a persuasive way.

Agreed - that Masterclass is so GOOD! and to put it in to practice, it's tough - especially because emotions get in the way.

Yeah, I don't know who this guy is (came here to hear Voss), but his ego was the first thing I noticed. He talks too much.

exactly, give the interviewee a chance to talk

I like the questions and the re-explanation slowly. It helps me as I’m not good at this.

😁 What are some of the aspects Boss’s influence has made an impact on?

want to roleplay mock negotiations using Chris Voss techniques?

Thank you for making yourself open and vulnerable with your comment. I hope you have great experiences with the new opportunities you discover. Considering everything is a negotiation is a safe way to protect ourselves as we go about our day.

@@RichLuciano1 thank you for the kind words...

Agreed. The interviewer is more focused on himself and what he does rather than his guest. No one is watching this interview for the interviewer. Get over yourself.

Anthony Dooley it seems like the interviewer wants Chris to hear more what he wants to say than hear what Chris has to say

That's right ;) I don't think he has read Chris' book.

Or maybe he's just excited to be conversing with Chris and has so much to get out. The original point is still valid though.

the interviewer is not interested and has no clue what this thing is all about at all, he treats it as one of his random other interviews. but Chris Voss is delivering a mastery that is highly underestimated and probably not even understood by 99% of the population. The guy should just go back playing football.

Tom Bowser I’ve been watching ads for it for two weeks. Was there a lot of role playing with different people in it? I’d really like to see it in action.

@@ChristyMurphyWriter there are about 18 sections and I would say that that there are at least 3-4 sections where Chris and an actor (actress named Pam) do a real good job of role playing. It really help bring Chris's method's to life in these sessions.

@@bowsertom1 That's great to hear! I live in LA, and I want to take one of is workshops. But until I can afford it, I might snag a MasterClass pass! Thank you, Tom!

"It seems like you got fish"

MaxDeveloper It’s a joke based on grant’s interview with Jordan Belfort

Charlesfrusa It sounds like no sense is sense

Grant Cardone does cocaine

Grant would probably create a seperate fish seminar for all to pay.

Of course that hurts because you have a history with them but sometimes it helps to look at your options objectively without emotion. Ask yourself what your goals are and what steps you need to take to get there. If you want to move on then you need to build up your life without them. You have the rest of your life to live and they are no longer a part of it. Their actions or words are no longer a part of your heart. You can do it. It won't hurt forever. Take care and know that some internet stranger cares ❤

Thanks for watching. If you would, please leave a review on Apple or Spotify sharing your thoughts on this episode so others might benefit from watching it. Appreciate you!

You're welcome,thank you for being here 🧡

Luxe Trust it seems like his voice gets you to understand certain concepts better

love to see MR. Voss and David Snyder together on a show that be pretty interesting.

Seek out all the Chris Voss videos you can find. They are all good.

What do you think about his book? :)

Andria Baunee sounds like you’re getting a lot out of the audiobook

@@30guarino there is a lot of additional content with the audiobook because You got the back and forth banter between the author and the reader.

Thank you! Appreciate you!

Google never split the difference summary cheat sheet. If you want more of his voice to see how to use speech rate and tonality then I heard the Master Class is worth it

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So happy you are enjoying the content. I would love for you to subscribe and leave me a review here: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/id596047499

Thank you so much Bella!

So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.