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@c0wb0y.crypt0 Жыл бұрын
My issue with saying it's not 'Ok' to let yourself become financially dependent upon a man? Women place themselves into that position, and biologically prefer it... To blame this on the man, by trying to frame it as an attempt to assert dominant power over someone? Well... For one, that shows where his mind goes, but two... Ok, I'll actually go so far as to even agree with this statement, in order to steelman it. It is truthful btw, just lacking in the overall perspective, which I'll get to in a second. The primary problem with this, isn't that we shouldn't be in positions that allow us to assert dominant power over someone... Everyone has that, even the women... The real issue is enforcement of the need to 'Sheath the Sword' as it is put proverbially. Be the monster, but know how to keep it at bay. Be the Warrior in the Garden, not the Gardener in the War.... This is the sentiment that proves why he's wrong. Now... That said... Before I get into more psychologically, and in turn biologically, founded portion? Let me point out... If I go to Thailand and instead of trying to become a Dual citizen of my country and Thailand, I instead forfeit citizenship entirely of my old country... Can I just later on, come back and beg for forgiveness? NOPE! I have to start the same immigration process as everyone else at that point. If a woman intentionally places herself into the position of being financially dependent upon a rich man, and then decides to leave him... She gets alimony... Men become dependent upon the emotional sponge that their wife is, via the connection of their bond, and without it they are far more broken than women are when that bond is torn apart. Women become dependent upon the provisional sponge that their husband is, via the connection of their bond, and without it they are far more broken than men are when that bond is torn apart. Saying that one side shouldn't become dependent on the other, but that a balance somewhere in between should be found? Ya, that I can accept... To just flat state that women don't need no man though? Fuck that shit... Yes they do, and men need women too...
@curious164 Жыл бұрын
One of the main answers to this question was answered in your podcast with Mary Harrington, Chris. Mary told us she almost died giving birth to her daughter. A lot of women don't want kids because they are very scared of what that physically entails for them - and rightly so. These risks can be fatal, or with awful short- and long-term effects on the body and mind. In the old days, unless a woman joined a Nunnery, she would have no choice - marriage meant pregnancy, and pregnancy meant life-threatening risk. Nowadays, contraception has given women a choice - and what women are choosing now, is probably what their female ancestors would have also chosen too, given the chance.
@chloebelle4923 Жыл бұрын
Many women CAN'T have children... MANY have been harmed by medical "interventions" affecting their reproductive organs. 😞
@sachaleoni89 Жыл бұрын
Thank you so much Chris!!! Greetings from Italy 🙏💪😜
@CharloGreeneOfficial Жыл бұрын
@@curious164 amen! CHOICE
@amandafuriasse46835 ай бұрын
two men without kids complaining about women not wanting kids
@manieshahook2286Ай бұрын
It didn’t seem like they are complaining? They are just talking about it and bringing up points and adding some of their own personal experience to it as well which people do when they are talking about a topic. I’m genuinely curious how they are complaining about it?
@WaveRider198915 күн бұрын
Did you even watch the video? Or paying attention to their words? I bet you commented after reading the title. Smh
@SavioureG13 күн бұрын
"Complaining", lol sounds like you are projecting. I'm guessing you are one of those women that decided you will never have kids. Tell me, how does it feel seeing all your friends having a family and living a happy life? while the most reliable companion you will ever have is your 12th cat who is not even born yet?
@ThrowAway-f6q12 күн бұрын
Why don’t they talk about men who don’t want kids? They fit the category.
@monicafigueroa98111 күн бұрын
For real!!!!
@FantasticLife2013 Жыл бұрын
Why is it always men who don't have kids complaining about women not wanting kids?
@skylinefever Жыл бұрын
These men want the advantage of a higher birth rate without the downsides of making and raising those kids.
@eyesthrurosecoloredglasses Жыл бұрын
They're wondering whether they'll have enough future 18 year olds to play Peter Pan with. Less babies born means fewer ladies and fewer little idiots to take advantage of and pump into.
@anewwaveanewbeginning3606 Жыл бұрын
Because they can’t have kids with women who don’t want kids? It’s not rocket science
@TheOlzee Жыл бұрын
Fine point.
@buzzlightyearandco Жыл бұрын
This is literally Chris Williamson's favourite topic of all time except he doesn't have kids and he's like over 35 lmao
@een2102 Жыл бұрын
Matt Hussey nails it. Unfair to judge women to seek careers when the worst situations in which I have seen women are when they are financially dependent on abusive men.
@doingjustfine9401 Жыл бұрын
Absolutely! I come from a low socio-economic background and watched my peers’ families break down due to domestic violence, infidelity, addiction and more. Kids are left traumatised and in poverty. The cycle then repeats.
@Comeonemane1 Жыл бұрын
right because men are not abused. good thinking
@A_Muzik Жыл бұрын
@@xfreeman86You clearly haven’t heard of a narcissist. Romantically speaking, they don’t reveal their true colors to their spouses until after the spouses say, “I do.”
@KFrost-fx7dt Жыл бұрын
jasonmazzulla3007 this conversation is about women. Go away.
@KFrost-fx7dt Жыл бұрын
xfreeman86 I don't have any male relatives. So just to play it safe, you can all f off.
@JaneG7 ай бұрын
There’s no need to go this far. Women don’t want to have kids because they simply don’t want to. That’s all. That’s more than valid.
@Sarah-ts1jh10 ай бұрын
Because it's not our job to have kids. Being a woman doesn't automatically equal mother or wife.
@monk4ever8 ай бұрын
She belongs to the streets! 😊
@Olliemaxx14 ай бұрын
@@monk4everHe belongs to the streets! 😄
@sadiegodwin2054 ай бұрын
@@Olliemaxx1 he's probably already on the streets - using his friends or local internet cafes to get online.
@Laoriginal7183 ай бұрын
Facts
@Laoriginal7183 ай бұрын
@@monk4everyour mom belonged to the streets and you probably grew up in the foster care system.
@Sprinkles_4046 ай бұрын
I don’t want kids, i just want to live my life stress free and financially stable..
@MeganWall10194 ай бұрын
Exactly why some ppl understand it’s selfishness covered up as “oh I don’t want kids because I wouldn’t be a good parent or this or that.” Its most reasons are selfish. Some reasons are valid but this is selfish. At least you’re honest.
@dedesunbeam93613 ай бұрын
I never wanted kids and never had them. My male partner and I had great jobs in high tech, paid off the house, retired early, and are best friends and have a great sex life. You're not any more selfish than people who want and have kids. Both of you are doing what you want to do. This is what life should be about. It shouldn't be about making yourself miserable. I can't stand kids and I knew it. otoh: My boyfriend (of 20 years) and I do a lot of volunteer work in several areas, one is animal rescue. We put a lot of time, work, and love into it. If people say we are selfish, we laugh at it because it is such a lie.
@leylanyfigueroa27833 ай бұрын
Preach it louder for those in the back🎉
@cricketylife87423 ай бұрын
@@dedesunbeam9361"You're not any more selfish who want and have kids." - Well said. The selfishness argument always baffles me. People who want children never stop to consider that having children could also be considered selfish.
@windsofmarchjourneyperrytr28233 ай бұрын
@@cricketylife8742 It's extremely selfish. Just look at the huge WASTE w diapers and they don't care about using tons of plastic in juice boxes and such, either...just to start. Second, most people's kids aren't going to release any new brilliance on the world, either.
@SheDetective Жыл бұрын
I think a lot of women are choosing not to have children because they were raised by single moms and saw how hard it was. Even the most loving relationships, 50% of married couples going by statistics split up, so there’s a rationale fear that if you have a baby, there’s a good chance you’ll be raising that kid alone
@Asto508 Жыл бұрын
Yes, coming from a broken family is a large predictor whether you want to have a family on your own. It's a very clear correlation. The majority of people of my generation that I met in my life came from a broken family themselves. It has become the norm, so of course you will see the results downstream.
@cocopepe9234 Жыл бұрын
I never thought about it like this. It seems like some truth in it. My mom was a single parent raising 4 kids from my abusive dad. I always said from the time I was in 6th grade that I want no kids or get married. I don't think that is normal for a middle school child to confidently proclaim
@tracyaf6084 Жыл бұрын
I think you hit the nail on the head. It’s the entire nuclear family that’s been devalued. I wouldn’t want to raise children without my husband. That thought alone has gotten me through some hard times in our marriage 😂.
@Someone42527 Жыл бұрын
Yet over 70% of divorces are initiated by women (90% for college edicated)
@20thcentury_toy Жыл бұрын
Too bad women are the ones doing the divorcing... Wait what...
@alexespinoza33255 ай бұрын
Unmarried man telling unmarried women they should have children... Where have we seen this before?
@saccount-z325 күн бұрын
in darkest version of germany
@phillynurse9492 Жыл бұрын
For women you’re damned if you do or don’t. If you start young you’re too broke society blames you for needing public assistance. If you wait until you have a career, adequate finances; your older and have increased risk of pregnancy complications. Then ppl blame you for putting your career first. It doesn’t matter whether you’re married or not the narrative never changes when choosing to be a mom. 🙄
@TGP109 Жыл бұрын
Very true, sadly. Of course, the ideal is to marry if you get pregnant young, but it takes two to do that.
@dirge2me Жыл бұрын
Agreed, because people conveniently forget the scorn they have for poor single mothers
@Juspeachy13 Жыл бұрын
This is so true. Young moms are seen as immature and incapable, while older moms are seen as being obsessed with their careers. It’s as if everyone expects every woman to have a child at the same age.
@yasminogbu8929 Жыл бұрын
Just do your best ❤️ nothing else you can do.
@benitocamela174 Жыл бұрын
@@dirge2me "poor single mothers" fcking lol
@tapiwakay7 ай бұрын
Having kids vs Raising kids. Big difference.
@pink1237480 Жыл бұрын
Getting married and having kids was never a dream. When i was a kid I wanted to be like steve Irwin and just learn about animals and the environment.
@Melly16yr1011 ай бұрын
Same here I dream of being a Zoo owner 😁
@amyr33098 ай бұрын
Yes!! Same never had the desire and still don’t 😂
@taftvalue8 ай бұрын
You were raised wrong. It's that simple.
@deckhead338 ай бұрын
@@taftvaluethe fact that you’re judging others for life decisions that don’t affect you, says you’re raised wrong. She’s perfectly normal 😊
@taftvalue8 ай бұрын
The low fertility rate in industrialized nations does affect me.@@deckhead33
@agentefren Жыл бұрын
Why does everyone assume the opposite of having a family is prioritizing money, sex, and drugs. As if there’s no other way to live a fulfilled life. There’s so much room in between that will make many of you more satisfied then having a traditional fam. Nobody ever considers how they can build a meaningful relationship with the world outside they typical path
@nicholasphelps3872 Жыл бұрын
The problem is, can't have EVERYBODY do that. And it's quite possible to do both. It's better then having your whole culture and nation go extinct. Genetic preservation and diffusion is the greatest accomplishment.
@talwyn_cc Жыл бұрын
The dichotomy is a Western society problem, it seems to me. A woman who chooses to be child free or spouse-less is often seen, or even expected, as the breadwinner of the family (at least in Southeast Asia that seems to be the case), or she's entering contemplative spiritual life. So no one bats an eye (in my community, this is the case.) on unmarried woman who will be thought of as a "spinster aunt". She's not seen as prioritizing sex, money, drugs. I would say there's a different expectation for men where I'm from. Like, sure, he is expected less to be serious about life but everyone would raise an eyebrow if he reaches 35 and he is still single and childless- something like hushed questions about his sexuality or he's onto something like still enjoying a carefree life. You are right in saying there is so much room in between. And it really is about what brings the individual a level of contentment in life. I think it really boils down to calming our nerves and seeing that people who choose to be childless, whether men or women, do so exercising their right to choose in a free society.
@maishazarinanan5028 Жыл бұрын
THIS!
@skylinefever Жыл бұрын
@@nicholasphelps3872 Not everybody will. I say let people who don't want children stop. That way, the "unwilling parent" genes can go extinct, and in a few generations, lead to fewer children who end up treated badly.
@triggered577 Жыл бұрын
Because they are narrow-minded, one-dimensional, and self aggrandized which hinders their ability to think beyond their biases towards ppl who don’t want to emulate their basic lifestyles. These people are truly pathetic.,
@alannalc Жыл бұрын
And it is better to regret not having kids than to regret having them, in my opinion.
@SSjLuigi1 Жыл бұрын
Well said, imagine bringing a life into this world and then regretting it..
@sissy-_-fnyc Жыл бұрын
Thank you for removing yourself from the gene pool 😅
@alannalc Жыл бұрын
@@sissy-_-fnyc I never said whether or not I 'removed myself from the gene pool', but did I state truths and facts nonetheless? Yep
@sissy-_-fnyc Жыл бұрын
@@alannalc Not true, but nice try. Your dilutions can keep you happy enough with some pharmaceutical intervention, I'm sure. Congratulations, you're extinct!
@SSjLuigi1 Жыл бұрын
@@sissy-_-fnyc wow, where did that come from? She makes a valid point. Do you know how many grandparents are dropped off at Nursing homes and just forgotten about? Not even a visit? It's pretty common. I would rather not have a kid than have that.
@elizabeth1178 Жыл бұрын
After becoming a mother it’s extremely exhausting to be completely financial independent and a mom. That’s why we need better relationships , interdependence is necessary in parenthood.
@rainasajid667810 ай бұрын
But most will forget to discuss the point of better relationships. If you treat women as shit which many guys do online and inside homes, then why in the world women want to be around you? Why can't men understand this at all! When women were made to become housewives, why did they treat them so badly? In other parts of the World, most women are stay-at-home wives, if men are so appreciative of families, women and motherhood, why are not they good to them? If mothers are so worthy then why do men make fun of their pregnant wives and their bodies post martem? Why do they subject their wives to domestic violence? And then justify it as well. Truly, if these same men had to become wives to cruel husbands, they would have opted out of this a long time ago.
@Vnm22079 ай бұрын
Interdependence doesn’t mean a husband/man/father - we need other arrangements and structures to be able to have real support networks to raise children. Some women who are single mothers are experimenting with teaming up to raise kids together- same household and sharing the responsibility/care. It seems to be working. I think we need more of that bc we simply cannot be delusional to think that men will change, they won’t, so for women who really want kids I would encourage to think about alternative options. Money is also another big issue here: if a woman has money enough to have a paid support network she doesn’t need a man at all. In fact in many cases men are just extra burdens.
@elderwitch86327 ай бұрын
@@Vnm2207 I like how it alway's comes back to men at fault.. sorry dear but you opened your legs. I really hope women stop having babies altogether. Enjoy your cat's. Because your concept of 'support network' is.. Someone else has to go work to fund your lazy entitled life. Try contributing for a change. ME ME ME
@Margriet1017 ай бұрын
Europe is better, i think i can have my baby for free the first years even daycare.
@jayc3420096 ай бұрын
@@rainasajid6678interesting point, just realise though that you women are no better at all. Vilifying men, blaming men for YOUR choices in life. Stop being man-haters.
@gk33307 ай бұрын
I’m surprised by Chris for the first time he has no right to judge when he is in his 30s and single. If you care so much go make someone a mother.
@omicron20182 ай бұрын
Ideally, with mutual consent.
@countd820228 күн бұрын
@@omicron2018😂
@countd820228 күн бұрын
@@omicron2018and people say women can’t be funny
@ecclairmayo41537 күн бұрын
Exactly. Also why is tye conversation not around men not having children?
@bluetickbeagles1166 күн бұрын
@@ecclairmayo4153exactly! Why is it always “women” not having kids…there’s a male in the equation somewhere. 🤨
@AlmaVasquezjr7 ай бұрын
Just because you find someone to marry, doesn't mean you can afford kids. It costs too much to live.
@melw23892 ай бұрын
Thank you
@TexasdontcareaboutyouАй бұрын
Hey get out of here with that logical thinking. I'm being a smart a** by the way, It's actually refreshing to see someone else using logic rather than their animal emotions to respond.
@milenaszporek2792 Жыл бұрын
Why is it always about ''women not having children''? It takes two to tango, always has. Everyone does, or should do, exactly what they want and can, given the conditions.
@leedlbagginshield8492 Жыл бұрын
the hypocrisy pisses me off too. It’s mostly single childless men in their 30s who are complaining.
@viciousshade Жыл бұрын
True, it takes 2 to tango and everyone is doing exactly what they want… u answered your own question
@evilds3261 Жыл бұрын
@@leedlbagginshield8492 It might have something to do with the idea that men are cars and women are gas stations. Thus, cars get angry when gas stations become less available, while if fewer cars are using gas stations, then there is plenty more for the cars who do use them. Still, it is very inconsiderate to get mad at someone for not wanting to do something, especially when that something will only make them miserable. And also, I know that the analogy I used is not quite accurate, but I could not come up with a better one. Please feel free to find a more suitable analogy if you want.
@user-wm7ny1qb2i8 ай бұрын
Because they believe that women have a natural drive to want children that is stronger than that of men. And if they don't satisfy that drive they will end up miserable.
@objectivityisourfriend96318 ай бұрын
Exactly, so wonky
@dwighthayles1226 Жыл бұрын
Women are becoming smart and I like the change in the trend. If you are going to have kids it should be with the intention of having a complete family permanently (marriage) and not ending up a single mother. Both men and women need to choose partners who are serious about having a family and having good values.
@angelaholmes8888 Жыл бұрын
You are totally right
@eduardomaldonado1647 Жыл бұрын
You do realize women initiate 80% of divorces right? You do realize women with degrees initiate 90% of the divorces? Many times they do it out of boredom. They get tired of the marriage because it involves work. Not only that they often take Half of the mans savings and possessions and collect alimony and child support and keep the house. They basically collect all the money but none of the obligations of having a husband. They get a sweet deal for getting divorced. Even if the woman has no children she still takes all of his stuff.
@anarcho-communist1111 ай бұрын
I wouldn't bring children into this world. I was just watching a video about kids born with schizophrenia, bipolar, and other conditions and it was horrifying. You never know what misery they'll run into even if you're the best parent.
@kelleemerson951011 ай бұрын
I agree with all but the marriage and having to have a partner/father permanently in the situation. Nothing is permanent. Male or female, have a child IF you are taking 100% responsibility for anything that comes along with that child. Your partner/the father may die.
@dwighthayles122611 ай бұрын
@@kelleemerson9510 I agree that death can stop something being permanent. However, we live in a world that is so evil that partners will even kill their spouse in order to get out of the marriage agreement. For sure if they die of natural causes then the partner who remains should be allowed to move on.
@doingjustfine9401 Жыл бұрын
Motherhood is extremely hard and expensive. What if my relationship/marriage breaks down? That’s me and my kids in poverty. Single motherhood is like nothing else. I saw my mum do it and she’s got little in retirement because she couldn’t work as much. She’ll have a tough time retiring. I’ll take care of her no matter what because that woman gave everything. Why would you want a life full of struggle for your sister, Aunt, cousin, daughter? Leave these women ALONE.
@shelbysycamore637 Жыл бұрын
You nailed it. The compensation package for motherhood ain't there for how much your contribute. The government could consider paying women but things have to go to crap first before they improve.
@TonyHeslington7 ай бұрын
Money is everything after all. Yay money give me more when I'm old and grey I'll look at my fat bank account and thank money for wonderful and purposeful life. Money will visit you on X-Mas day and tell you it loves you and so will all your bankers... like they did in Scrooge! Interesting too that only women who've had children will have bodies that break down when their old? Your right about hard it is too... One can only imagine how a woman who lived 100 years ago managed to do it without Television, iPhones and uber eats? Don't think me to harsh. I'm trying to show you perspective. Life was hard, is hard and always will be. You make your own strength...or you will have none!
@jayc3420096 ай бұрын
@@shelbysycamore637are you serious...our government is in so much debt and now you expect them to pay mothers ? You are delusional
@cynicist81146 ай бұрын
Almost like you need a man...
@playfulpanthress5 ай бұрын
@@cynicist8114We really don't. That's why males like you get upset. 😂
@angelsrosena3 ай бұрын
I was born in 86, never wanted to have kids and today at 37 I have no regrets whatsoever.
@LucareonVee3 ай бұрын
82 baby here. Same for me. 😎🍻
@katelocke428819 күн бұрын
85 😊
@ancientmage26692 күн бұрын
❤❤Smart girl
@djnastyhank6 ай бұрын
Why would I have children … when I can’t afford myself ….
@leosicairos1135 Жыл бұрын
In today's world, you need to take care of yourself before you take take of someone else. This goes for both partners.
@jaclynh93432 ай бұрын
💯
@etaylor80286 ай бұрын
It’s because men shamed women for being single mothers. Called them “used cars” and things like that. Half of marriages end in divorce, and women don’t want to be seen as used cars, so now women just don’t want kids.
@roshellegouldbourne787Ай бұрын
Exactly.
@nhl4264 Жыл бұрын
What people are yearning for is a fix to fill the void inside. Nothing outside of you can ever make you happy, even kids can't make you happy!!!
@YummyFoodOnlyPlz Жыл бұрын
That's true. However, name an endeavor an individual human can do that will fill that void? Hard to come up with the exact THING other than transcending oneself over time and space by having biological offspring, well that's called human nature. You are not wrong that there are things that can replace having a family, but most of these things aren't accessible to an average person. It's false equivalency for an average person to say having a career or whatever else is a full replacement of having a family -- most people don't have any kind of career, they have an average job that is neither interesting nor fulfilling.
@juventuseratv7711 Жыл бұрын
Love this reply, at least getting stuck in a marriage or family will never bring the happiness in the long run.
@darbrad3952 Жыл бұрын
We are here basically to reproduce. There is nothing more natural than that. Filling the void with a stupid job where your around a load of fake people that will replace you as soon as your no longer useful or someone is better that's not very fulfilling
@yasminogbu8929 Жыл бұрын
Agreed!
@Kurio71 Жыл бұрын
What's the void?
@psyso999 Жыл бұрын
If you want kids..have them! if you don’t then don’t.. there’s so much commentary on this topic right now but people are waaaay too emotional about it. The only people that should be having children are those willing and able to RAISE them. As for the rest, it’s your life, live it in a way that is fulfilling to you
@BENR8108 Жыл бұрын
As long as those people who don’t have kids expect those of us who put the DECADES of time and effort into raising well adjusted kids to then expect our kids to care for them when their old. There is a social contract that we all have with our community to pass along to the next generation. When people who don’t have kids , and just live for themselves; but then rely on the state and the care of those now grown kids that’s an issue. Parents who raise kids well; have a much greater chance of having care and support when their older. Those Childless couples are going to be in for a rude awakening when they are truly alone in their twilight years.
@lynnecartwright3976 Жыл бұрын
@@BENR8108 as an ex nurse I can assure you that even those WITH kids will be looked after by someone elses kids... many are chucked into nursing homes as soon as it all becomes too much trouble to look after old mum and dad....
@stevearnold8265 Жыл бұрын
Yes but that means we go bye bye. The invaders come and they kill us.
@Asto508 Жыл бұрын
@@BENR8108 The social contract is fulfilled by paying my taxes and developing stuff that makes all your lives easier in the long run. If your sole reason to have children is to be nurtured when you're an old fart, then you should not have children either.
@BENR8108 Жыл бұрын
@@lynnecartwright3976 not of there is not enough people to watch them…. Population decline is going limit services across the modern economy; and it’s going to force families who can’t afford rising costs to ship mom and dad to a nursing home instead to keep them home with them. I don’t think you fully appreciate how many people are going to be dying over the next 30 years, and that we don’t have the volume of kids to replace them. Our young adults now aren’t coupling and have kids… 50% of men DONT want to have a relationship at all. Most men from 18-30 haven’t had sex in a year. Childless women are going to be a majority within 20 years if trends continue… But hey, those without kids have a guarantee to die alone, those of us with kids (if we raise them well) have a greater chance being cared for and surrounded by our loved ones. So no chance (childless people) or some chance (those of us with kids). I know my choice..
@NatalieMarie9176 ай бұрын
Let’s not ignore the fact that there are many mothers who regretted having kids or at least would have chosen differently if they could go back in time. It’s just not as socially acceptable to admit, so the data on it is much harder to capture.
@ancientmage26692 күн бұрын
Yes, I don't know if it's menopause or what but I feel detached from my 28 yr old son. I honestly hated being pregnant and raising him by myself. Those were dark days but I felt pressured to have at least one bcs my late mother guilt trip me. She was one miserable woman and so was my late stepmother. I tell my son to be child free and he'll thank me someday. It makes me sick when I meet those women with 2 or more children and are just miserable. And what's worst is that they all tell the world how great it is to be a mother. Cheers😊
@Maclyn887 ай бұрын
Most men can't provide enough to support a family. It's pretty simple.
@ThrowAway-f6q12 күн бұрын
Both of them aren’t fathers
@Maclyn8812 күн бұрын
@@ThrowAway-f6q your comment makes no sense dude
@pineapple1612 Жыл бұрын
I am 33 and just never felt like I want to be a mom... it's as simple as that!
@MrBooYa-yd5er27 күн бұрын
It’s probably what you were taught. Women by and large go with the herd. They used to be expected to be mothers so they were now they’re told they shouldn’t so they don’t.
@robcab37258 ай бұрын
Nobody talks about how it's too expensive ...ever
@LauraReed-wu2ww4 ай бұрын
I know 😒 Or how it's not just women who choose to not have kids...it's men too. The hypocrisy is insufferable
@rr-brown64453 ай бұрын
Because they’re making that KZfaq money, and they’re disconnected from that.
@nwalden57442 ай бұрын
Right
@ElliotBurridgeАй бұрын
Because it's not. The poorer half of society now have more kids than the richer half. Common misconception.
@michemiche1764 Жыл бұрын
I really don't think two men could truly fathom the intricacies of why a woman would not want children, it's a lot more than reading statistics and trying to guess what women think. I'm in my mid 30s and don't have kids and I know at least 20 other women the same age and older who don't either. The few people I know with kids sadly seem miserable/regretful and alot have turned to alcohol to cope with the pressure of raising their kids in todays world. I'm undecided personally, but from conversations I do know that some of the reasons surrounding women not wanting kids at all or being undecided are: - How much money it actually takes to raise a child nowadays - Lack of quality men to have kids with or that want kids themselves - Stress over how a child will impact their already fragile mental health (most with anxiety issues or coming from family & financial traumas) - Fear of loosing their identity and then subsequently their sanity. - Not liking the world we live in, therefore not wanting to bring a child into it. There is also a whole childfree movement on social media where people are being advised by those with children not to do it, because they themselves are suicidal. There's an anonymous facebook group where women say they love their kids but hate motherhood and make a clear distinction between the two. Its actually really sad what they go through if you read it, and no matter what men may think, their roles as fathers NEVER amount to the level of physical and emotional labour a woman signs up for when she gets pregnant and has a baby, so I think this is a topic best handled with care on all ends.
@covfefe_drumpfh Жыл бұрын
💯 facts!!
@jones2277 Жыл бұрын
Well said!
@ksuneetha35026 ай бұрын
Very true
@savagesweetheart906 ай бұрын
❤❤❤❤
@jayc3420096 ай бұрын
You complain about a lack of men wanting go be fathers and then say in the same sentence fathers will never be as meaningful as mothers, can you really blame men for not wanting to be fathers? As a man I don't want children or to be married because men are treated like trash and considered unimportant. You are part of the problem.
@anncovered Жыл бұрын
"You have to be a pretty strong person to go, 'I don't think that's the answer'" That hit me super hard. I think most people are led to believe to do what society expects them to do. It takes guts and a strong will to say I don't want to do this and I want to carve my own path.
@moonknight4053 Жыл бұрын
Having children even if it’s just one or two, will be paving the way for your future generation. But there are some people who just shouldn’t have kids, cuz they themselves are just nuts
@terdferguson1736 Жыл бұрын
Right and that’s why I don’t vote democrat anymore even though they control all the messaging , from university to entertainment. And their message of saying your on the right side of history and you are a good person as long as you do what they say is right. And if not you are evil. But I combat this propaganda being actually informed and strong enough in my principals,Even when they may not benefit me. I know that they are no longer a liberal party, they are closer to authoritarian facist then the tolerance they say they stand for. I’ll stand for women because these supposed feminist won’t. I stand for equality for all not equity by any means necessary. And I refuse to be racist to minorities when they don’t have the same views as me. And if you haven’t had this realization yet , you should especially if you’re an American women being erased by the left.
@autumxxleaves4186 Жыл бұрын
@@moonknight4053 and some people are selfish. Not wanting children ISNT a character flaw. Chill out with the hate
@whatsupbudbud Жыл бұрын
It gets easier if you persevere. A bunch of my friends are all players pretty much but I've always been adamant that I want a woman for life and have kids with her. At first they would try to sway me away from such foolishness and hey, the dating market is a tough one and one has to, to quote Chris, cycle through multiple people before you find a person who actually shares your values, so I get their skepticism but eventually they have come to accept it and some even start to aspire to something similar because the endless swipe/party/sex routine gets boring and makes you jaded. Granted, there is a long way to go for people in this state of mind since the brainwashing is so pervasive. Thinking about this reminded me of a quote by Matthew Mcconaughey in the movie Contact where he, as a person of cloth and an book author, argued that science and technology does not make us happy, that we fill our lives with stuff and, even though we are more connectable than ever before, we feel more alone as well. And this was in 1997. His argument was that it is faith in God that is the key but I think modern society has deducted that it is not, in fact. That being said, purpose still is at the top of Maslow's hierarchy of needs and, since a lot of us have our basic needs met, this is the top priority for our generation. If you've ever had a small person look up at you with those beady eyes and complete trust in you, you will understand that there likely isn't anything more purposeful than being true to the image the child sees in you.
@moonknight4053 Жыл бұрын
@@autumxxleaves4186 I have no hate towards ppl who won’t have kids. I’m telling you that there are people who shouldn’t have kids as they lack the maturity to help a kid grow eg Narcissists, physically abusive parents, etc
@j.z.warszawska17587 ай бұрын
So 2 men are talking about what women want or not. Legit, legit.
@ThrowAway-f6q12 күн бұрын
None is a father
@jhonsmith5710 Жыл бұрын
As a guy who thought he wanted to have kids, I can understand why anyone in general wouldn’t want to have kids. Especially nowadays, people are barely getting by. I really so think the first question you should be asking is can you afford having a kid. Second question should be, will you have time to properly raise a kid? Third question, are you psychologically/emotionally ready to have a kid?
@jacqueslee2592 Жыл бұрын
You are one of the millions who chose not to have children to balance the environmental, social, impact that overpopulation is having. The world is becoming more unsustainable by the day, social economic issues impact our mental and health, which will impact the lives of children. Imagine bringing innocent babies to a world of suffering and bleakness as overpopulation is going to lead to due to rising competition for food, jobs, and housing and then risk of war and environmental destruction. Do not blame yourself. You are having an impact to future generations who may or may not see the same world that we saw.
@extern83 Жыл бұрын
@@jacqueslee2592 sounds like you're a communist...
@HashtagAPI810 ай бұрын
@@jacqueslee2592shut up Meg
@user-cz5lj2vx1f7 ай бұрын
You're posing the RIGHT questions. The only caveat I'd raise is to CHANGE THE ORDER of your questions: the FIRST question should be "Are you psychologicaly/emotionally ready to raise a child?"--and if ntot GET THERAPY
@heredianna24966 ай бұрын
@user-cz5lj2vx1f Actually the first question should be do you want kids ? For some people the answer no is easy and they don't even have to think about the other questions. For others the answer is yes or I am not sure.... then in that case they should continue with the other questions and realize that they may start working on themselves first....financial, emotional...to be ready when the time is right for them.
@Priya-rf7ov Жыл бұрын
I’m childfree by choice and happily married for 16 years and no I’m not SAD and MISERABLE …please stop deciding for me. to all the trad wives good on you, respect your choice. CHOICE CHOICE CHOICE CHOICE CHOICE
@fofofofo6182 Жыл бұрын
I think people are talking mostly about childless not by choice
@babegirlaya Жыл бұрын
@@IPx3_Broken lmao you are so mad for no reason
@vidhead85 Жыл бұрын
Childfree man here. Any misery in my life isn't due to lack of children. I have enough to deal with aside from an imaginary child I think some like to project their fears because they're jealous of the freedom we have as childfree ppl
@metapixusion Жыл бұрын
I don’t think society even recognizes childfree married and happy couples . Like i don’t feel like there’s an established community yet. Like im still struggling to find other married child free couples to be friends with in my area. It feels like its in a new concept stage that’s just now starting to get popular.
@vidhead85 Жыл бұрын
@@metapixusion Interesting there too because a lot of people automatically couple marriage with children. So people ask "Why get married if you don't want kids?" Because I fricking wanted to lol
@stardust68705 ай бұрын
Look, women are judged and called selfish and future cat ladies if they don't want kids. However, mothers also face judgment and are called egotistical for the following: - If they exercise during pregnancy because some irrational people think that might hurt the fetus; - If they choose C-section; - If they can't or don't want to breastfeed; - If they hold their babies too much or whenever babies cry/If they don't hold their babies enough of whenever they cry; - If they go back to work too fast/If they're stay-at-home moms and choose not to go back into the workforce; - If they don't give enough attention and love to their partners during the first months/years of the baby's life; Let's not forget that choosing motherhood is a sacrifice right off the bat, one that men will never have to endure: - Having to avoid certain foods during the entire pregnancy and breastfeeding; - Not being able to drink alcohol, energy drinks, or anything remotely damaging to the baby; - Not being able to take most pills for the pain; - Being constantly tired and unable to do much for nine months; - Being nauseous, having your bones move, and your skin stretch; - Having to do multiple blood tests, ultrasounds, and vaginal exams, while men barely have the courage to go to prostate screening; - Having a fetus and its development depends entirely on a woman, meaning the fetus absorbs minerals from the mother to build its bones and joints. If the mother doesn't have enough, calcium from the mother's bones is automatically secreted, sometimes leading to depletion or osteoporosis. - Having to give birth, and there's no good option for the mother. If she chooses vaginal delivery, she'll be in extreme pain, and the doctors will likely cut her perineum. If she chooses a C-section, that's major surgery, and the recovery will take weeks. - Potentially struggling with postpartum depression. There's so much more, but I'll stop here.
@ThrowAway-f6q12 күн бұрын
These two men have no children.
@mars5610011 ай бұрын
It comes right down to what a woman wants in her life! It’s nobody’s business but her own.
@kateinparadise Жыл бұрын
I’m just wondering why more people are not adopting more. There are so many children that need a loving mother ❤
@lightofall Жыл бұрын
I'd love to but I need tobget a bigger house and the whole process is ruthless aswell
@covfefe_drumpfh Жыл бұрын
Because the legalized child trafficking racket that's adoption makes it super hard for otherwise qualified individuals to do so.
@ladykd23555 ай бұрын
I used to think that if I didn't want to have children, that I would adopt, but the older I got, the more I realized that that didn't make sense either. To me, if I'm not wanting to mother my own biological child, why would I want to mother someone else's? It's a huge risk... It's just like going to the pound and picking out a dog - it's either going to be your best friend or it's going to be a nightmare, so it's a total toss-up that you are saddled with for the rest of your life. I have a friend who adopted and luckily he was rich because that kid ended up needing over $500,000 in therapy and it still never fixed what was wrong with him. The kid was nuts. 🤷♀️
@windsofmarchjourneyperrytr28233 ай бұрын
@@ladykd2355 you don't know anything about dogs, huh? I've never had a bad dog. Had dogs around over half a century. Lots of dogs at the pound are purebred, btw. I'll pick a dog over a kid ANY day.
@Laoriginal7183 ай бұрын
People most people don’t want to raise someone else’s kid. Why are there children in the foster care system in the first place??? That’s the real question.
@carolynngockel36707 ай бұрын
Blaming women is shitty. When I was dating it took a long time to find a guy who had the same values as me when it came to raising children. I knew I didn't want to work full-time when my kids were small. But most of the men I met wanted two incomes. I found my guy, but I was 29.
@KhadidjaKhadouj-ur4keАй бұрын
You are still young
@KhadidjaKhadouj-ur4keАй бұрын
Are you from USA?
@Diana73411 ай бұрын
Women are seeing the lack of help they get when most of them have children and realize that they cannot afford the sacrifice it takes to raise children if you are not wealthy.
@jayc3420096 ай бұрын
This isn't just a woman problem, having a child is a luxury most cannot afford.
@db68815 ай бұрын
@@jayc342009It is mainly womens problem because men can always walk or run away.
@jayc3420095 ай бұрын
@@db6881 ...no...affordability is not a woman's problem. We are talking about people who DON'T have children because its unaffordable. Men also have that problem.
@db68815 ай бұрын
@@jayc342009 Fact of the matter is the person in the equation who is more likely to walk/run out completely is the man. Which has been proven decade after decade generation after generation.
@LucieEleanor Жыл бұрын
As a happily married child free women in her mid-thirties, all I have heard in my life is how difficult it is having children, how my career will take a financial hit it will never recover from and the extra unpaid labour I will take on due to the gender mental load gap will leave me statistically more stressed and unhappy. I also live in a major city where most people I know cannot afford to move into their own place, a cost of living crisis in the UK and the climate crisis where I am not sure what sort of future these hypothetical children will grow up in. Those I know who have had children really struggle financially to pay for child care when they do go back to work. With all of this, are we really surprised that more women are opting out? There is so much more to it than women just looking to go to Paris and eat pastries.
@doubled3962 Жыл бұрын
100 💯 agree
@siheath3648 Жыл бұрын
Climate crisis...🙄
@MichelleAntonia Жыл бұрын
Exactly. It's so much more complex, and being called "selfish" for it is completely unfair.
@YummyFoodOnlyPlz Жыл бұрын
Assuming your premise is right (which I completely disagree with) that women need this much financial security to even start thinking about having children, now, what are you going to do with all that wealth by yourself? How tasty is that Michelin 3 star meal lasting a few long hours when you eat alone? How joyful is that private jet ride when you ride by yourself? How exciting is it to confront your own purposefully chosen biological dead end every single day for the rest of the few decades of your life? By statistics you will likely outlive your husband by one decade or more, so yeah... What a well lived life that is. I applaud your bravery.
@doubled3962 Жыл бұрын
@@YummyFoodOnlyPlz keep in mind , a lot of people have first family’s and second family’s blended .. most Men do not get sole custody, and they have to pay child support. Most men I knew could not afford to have anymore children , because of child support , but .. if they got with a women with kids getting child support from another man , well they can make it work. It’s been like this for years now at least 20yrs
@junewilliams47523 ай бұрын
Childfree and happy. I tire of hearing the regret some of my friends have expressed for having kids.
@JackAcid Жыл бұрын
Childfree male here. I knew when I was a kid myself that I didn't want to be a parent, and have also endured societal pressure, stigma and endless condescension from my peers who all told me "you'll change your mind". Well, I didn't, and haven't, and still do not regret it. My partner and I are happy, fulfilled and live our lives to the absolute max, ALL whilst being the best possible uncle and aunty to our amazing little nephews. I understand that the pressures of women are enormous and it makes me mad and sad at the same time. For a long time I was extremely confrontational about it. I understand that this was the best way at the time for me to just shut people up. As I get older I have the power of reason and can happily, and do, talk about it freely without gear of being judged.
@teoleno4019 Жыл бұрын
Nobody cares. Men without kids are not shamed by society like childfree woman are.
@thispersonrighthere9024 Жыл бұрын
same! i grew up in a home where money was always tight. i'm not a millionaire, but my wife and i earn enough to live comfortably. if we had kids (whom neither of us want), i would go back to that situation where money is tight, and i don't ever want to feel that way ever again. and the cost of living gets more expensive everyday. no kids for me; i'm good.
@tatazuki1451 Жыл бұрын
❤️🙏❤️
@selrox879 Жыл бұрын
All love to you and your partner. You re a real one❤
@selrox879 Жыл бұрын
@@thispersonrighthere9024 so sorry to hear that...❤
@acewalker Жыл бұрын
Because they don't want to be a mom and there's nothing wrong with that. There's still so many women who wants kids.
@Hannah-eq5ff4 ай бұрын
40 and child free. I never imagined me having a baby or being a mother. I made that decision when I was in high school.
@LucareonVee4 ай бұрын
41 and childfree. Realized that I never wanted to be a father when I was 12. 😁
@Hannah-eq5ff2 ай бұрын
@@LucareonVee you made that decision very early in life
@blessings4life Жыл бұрын
Or women just don’t want to.
@LucareonVee Жыл бұрын
Men too. 🍻
@MalesAreDemons2 ай бұрын
It’s a scam !!!
@jones2277 Жыл бұрын
Can’t afford a home or childcare, can’t find husband material and you wonder why so many women aren’t having children
@blah914 Жыл бұрын
no matter the good intentions, two men sitting there talking about why women dont want childre never really ceases to amuse me... does it ever ocurr to these male podcasters to talk to women about this issue?
@La125276 ай бұрын
Exactly!!! Jfc
@jayc3420096 ай бұрын
Wow, so many bitter cat ladies in the comments
@playfulpanthress5 ай бұрын
@@jayc342009Bitter? Were you looking in the mirror when you wrote that?? I'm a cat lady and proud of it. I can do what I want whenever I want. That includes sex.
@jayc3420095 ай бұрын
@@playfulpanthress femcel
@krii9983 ай бұрын
@@jayc342009wow so many entitled men in the comments, boy stfu
@bltvd Жыл бұрын
I am sooo happy my wife does not want kids. Cuz i sure the fuck dont!
@Nah-ah Жыл бұрын
😂😂😂
@Nah-ah Жыл бұрын
You know what’s also funny? A lot of men don’t want kids but they want sex… so they’re gonna jump on the bandwagon for women to settle down and have kids so these guys have a chance to have sex!
@Tizzy-Lizzy7 ай бұрын
What i dont understand is, why are all these men so pressed about woman not wanting marriage and kids? Why are they talking about what woman want to do with their lives and these are woman they dont even know. Why dont they talk about men that dont want children and let us be
@phtevlin Жыл бұрын
I'm still waiting for the podcast that deals with parents (male & female) who regretted having kids. Not everyone is cut out to be a parent.
@wyleecoyotee4252 Жыл бұрын
They don't want to do podcasts dealing with those realities. Also do podcasts on women who regret marriage
@Maybe-cg2tn Жыл бұрын
I'd like to see one on how many women had unplanned births. What's the percent on that?
@consciouscrypto3090 Жыл бұрын
they can't put those people on camera because the kids will see it someday
@ggkinz8506 Жыл бұрын
that part
@skylinefever Жыл бұрын
@@consciouscrypto3090 Maybe the video should pixelate the faces and distort the voices to prevent recognition.
@nadinefay15604 ай бұрын
Look it’s very simple, no employment , no housing, no money, social issues that won’t improve in our lifetimes, lack of quality men, the pain involved during the entire process, health reasons, mental health reasons, lack of social structure. Zero incentive
@yogivioletstarr4 ай бұрын
We’re running out of drinkable water and clean air but yeah let’s breed
@Redflowers96 ай бұрын
When someone tells me that them having children is something that "just happened" and now they're struggling, I honestly couldn't give a fuck.
@GDub96 Жыл бұрын
People are starting to wake up. Having kids sucks and there are absolutely NO tangible benefits. They are like very expensive long term pets. Sorry to be so real about it but we should be able to speak honestly about this without getting emotional.
@zerotolerance2026 Жыл бұрын
I respect your honesty and I completely agree.
@blacklyfe554311 ай бұрын
Wrong having kids is the best thing in the world maybe for you it sucks but for most people it's amazing
@windsofmarchjourneyperrytr28233 ай бұрын
@@blacklyfe5543Says a man, who very likely isn't cleaning any shite off his kid's butt, OR his parents.
@rr-brown64453 ай бұрын
It’s definitely a choice that involves sacrificing certain things. Kids aren’t pets though, that’s completely off base; only someone who doesn’t have kids , and really knows nothing about kids would say that.
@JSM-bb80u2 ай бұрын
@@blacklyfe5543No.Having children is selfish
@NotFound-d1z4 ай бұрын
I’m 26 and always have been single, celibate and child free I love it I’m a free woman and not ashamed 😌
@LucareonVee4 ай бұрын
😎🍻
@mariabr8954 Жыл бұрын
As a 24 year old living in Toronto I think what wasn't mentioned is the "economical state" of our current society. Most Gen Z and millenials are in thousands of dollar in education debt. In Toronto it's impossible to buy a house unless you're making six figures. I personally want kids but don't want to bring a child into this world when I know that I need to create more stability in my life first. when it comes to bringing a life into the world, it's better to have more educated and informed decisions because it's one of the (if not the) most important action anyone makes in their life
@akp167 Жыл бұрын
People got married much younger decades ago. They weren't rich. They were broke but they figured things out together. Instead of looking at marriage as a way to build wealth, we have switched things around and turned it into "wealth before marriage." That was always going to be a recipe for disaster, especially for women.
@ggkinz8506 Жыл бұрын
the housing market has me depressed depressed
@ggkinz8506 Жыл бұрын
@@akp167 If you know better you do better
@djangomarine6658 Жыл бұрын
It's a lot easier to have a six figure household with two incomes than with one. A lot of stability comes from marriage. Ijs. You just have to find someone that you're willing to put up with, that's also willing to put up with you. That's the hard part. lol
@ggkinz8506 Жыл бұрын
@@djangomarine6658 if you're both working who's watching the kids?
@doingjustfine9401 Жыл бұрын
Having kids is a HUGE risk. You become reliant and dependant on the man, who could become abusive. Leaving an abusive situation is extremely hard if you have kids in tow. While they might escape the abusive relationship, a life of poverty awaits on the other side.
@lightofall Жыл бұрын
not true, courts rule 50 percent of assets. if I was to have children I think id also get married
@lightofall Жыл бұрын
also you can have prenups done so if you are financially independent anyway you will have that and will be given support urgently as priority from councils etc, not ideal but at least our country has it. many don't
@tessemerrose Жыл бұрын
@@anastasiassecret3837 I had a criminal father so I know what you're talking about sadly....thankfully I'm still alive. It is awful. Glad you're aware of the dark shit that goes on behind closed doors. It is literal madness
@athena386511 ай бұрын
With more abusive relationships, ahead. Happened to me. Ruined my life. I'm 65.
@selloanemahlatsi54110 ай бұрын
For black women ,this is almost always guaranteed . Black women benefit the least from marriage and children
@MsFrida2012 Жыл бұрын
Well, some of us are just struggling to find partners. I dont understand why almost every male on KZfaq is blaming us and using fear mongering tactics to shame us about our lack of children by 30. Some of us (women) are just not men's choice of partners for parenthood or marriage. And after so much lack of interest, i am at peace with the single/childless life that awaits me. Blame the endless choices on dating apps
@lightofall Жыл бұрын
agreed I've been single for 4 years and many men are addicted
@barrydaemi62877 ай бұрын
As a man myself, I might suggest that you might want to approach men. Currently it is not acceptable for us men to approach women, so if you want to attract a man, you are going to have to approach them. Just spark up a simple conservation, about the weather, or about something simple. Men are not that complicated, just be slightly friendly and a little bit warm, and you probably won him over.
@MelissaGarza5 ай бұрын
@@barrydaemi6287I’ve been single for over 14 years now and have no problem approaching men. They just are not looking for anything serious IMHO.
@windsofmarchjourneyperrytr28233 ай бұрын
We were better off w the Chicago Reader personals. You left a voice message, could tell if they're lying or not or creepy. And they were real and lived near you. Met up for coffee in a few days or less. Didn't waste time w boring texting for MONTHS.
@KillersWalkFree Жыл бұрын
If you know the world is a horrible place and you choose to have kids, you're responsible for all the horrible things that happen to your children.
@emj31615 ай бұрын
By that logic your parents are responsible for all the horrible things that happen to you. That doesn't make any sense.
@KillersWalkFree5 ай бұрын
They technically are lol@@emj3161
@daleburrows26622 ай бұрын
@@emj3161well, technically they are indirectly responsible for all your suffering. When you create another life you're taking a risk
@benweiseguitar3 ай бұрын
People who are so quick to judge childfree women… y’all know it costs roughly $400,000 a year to raise a child in this country?? Unless you have THAT kinda money, you have no reason to talk.
@bzrbuzzy5 ай бұрын
Love how two men are talking about how women are so sad they don't have kids. SOME WOMEN ARE CHILDFREE BY CHOICE. WHY AREN'T THERE DATING COACHES FOR CHILDFREE WOMEN????
@karenhaggard70947 ай бұрын
Young women grew up watching women like me. Im an elder Millennial who worked full time and have to be the breadwinners and do the job of full time house wives at the same time. They are OVER it. I dont blame young women for not dating.
@James-mv9qx Жыл бұрын
You don't need to have kids these days you can have a perfectly fulfilling life with a good career, holidays and some investments
@chriscampbell9191 Жыл бұрын
And that is exactly what a lot of people end up with, regardless of whatever familial aspirations they may have had earlier in life.
@nicholasphelps3872 Жыл бұрын
Till the fertility collapse makes a population collapse and third world invasion and replacement. Theres only one way to fight that extinction...
@skylinefever Жыл бұрын
@@nicholasphelps3872 Japan and South Korea didn't buy into the replacement migration BS.
@jacqueslee2592 Жыл бұрын
The world is becoming more unsustainable by the day, social economic issues impact our mental and health, which will impact the lives of children. Imagine bringing innocent babies to a world of suffering and bleakness as overpopulation is going to lead to due to rising competition for food, jobs, and housing and then risk of war and environmental destruction. Do not blame yourself. You are having an impact to future generations who may or may not see the same world that we saw.
@skylinefever Жыл бұрын
@@nicholasphelps3872 That's true too. Lock the borders and let the nations who have loads of children learn to cope.
@mohamadmottaghi4519 Жыл бұрын
make the choice on your own and try to not be influenced by external factors and enjoy your life. it gets complicated when it becomes a political or social decision rather than personal
@LadyLiberty-c8i Жыл бұрын
@@nicholasphelps3872 who cares?
@skylinefever Жыл бұрын
@@nicholasphelps3872 Well then, you go find a way to incentivize the British to make and raise those babies.
@Yumicpcake Жыл бұрын
It's the side effects of having a bad childhood. My mom was emotionally immature with narcissistic tendencies and an unpredictable alcoholic who was violent. My dad was indifferent to me. They were divorced before I was 3. I barely knew my dad. I don't connect well with people and definitely not well enough with men to raise a kid with one. Children need 2 parents who actually care for them. The environment for children sucks and life is expensive. Think about nature: females in safe environments with plenty of resources breed, females in dangerous conditions will little to no resources will not breed if they have the choice because they are self preserving to survive.
@filipbelciug Жыл бұрын
I largely agree with you with one exception: humans work differently. Humans, if they have precarious conditions make more children than ever (see the poor countries) while if they taste abundance they abandon the family life (see the developed countries)
@AlexBobalexRavenclaw Жыл бұрын
Although I agree that bad childhoods suck, I don’t agree that safe women breed and women who were not safe are just trying to survive. Why is that in the West, where it is significantly safer and thriving, the population is stagnating, but in third world countries, the population continues to boom?
@eucliduschaumeau8813 Жыл бұрын
Very well said. My childhood was fine, but having kids is a lifetime commitment that requires every drop of a person's resources, money, freedom and time.
@imoutsideoutintheforest8337 Жыл бұрын
@@filipbelciug Do you ever wonder if those people who have children in the poor countries really think that they are living in precarious conditions, or they think otherwise when they're having children.
@ReasonAboveEverything Жыл бұрын
@@AlexBobalexRavenclaw the populations are stagnating in 75% of all countries. East Asia, West, west Asia, south America. Pretty much only places above replacement levels are in sub Sahara and they are getting there within next 25 years.
@catherinecoulton615011 ай бұрын
It's better not to have children than regret having them .
@blacklyfe554311 ай бұрын
Nope it's better to regret having kids than to regret not having kids you can't regret something you have only something you missed out on
@monicaolsson76084 ай бұрын
@@blacklyfe5543But if you regret having kids, they will know. And you might suck at being a parent if you hate it. So it's pretty selfish to have them if you're not sure.
@blacklyfe55434 ай бұрын
@monicaolsson7608 I disagree you are supposed to have kids. If every man had the same mindset as you, you wouldn't have been born, and your family wouldn't exist. You should be grateful.
@blacklyfe55434 ай бұрын
@monicaolsson7608 is wrong than it means you are a shitty person. If it wasn't for your mom or dad, you wouldn't have been born, and no one in your family would exist.
@blacklyfe55434 ай бұрын
@@monicaolsson7608humans are here to reproduce on the earth.
@r.1.336 Жыл бұрын
I don’t want special needs kids so I’m not going to risk it
@natalianat91057 ай бұрын
Men dont have to go through painful pregnancy and labour pains. Just seed the sperms and just done. After that, all burdens go to mothers. But....if men are willing to share household chores tasks, including cooking, cleaning up windows, floors, furnitures, laundry, etc etc, it will help most women in marriage. The time has change, women nowadays are willing to share the burden of earning money in the house. Share half:half of all burdens in marriage, take care of kids TOGETHER (like, men, you should learn to bathe your kids and change diapers and such). Then many women will be eager more to participate in marriage. I can work up all household tasks and such but thinking abt "slavery" type of wife works, losing sleep ALONE to take care of kids is kinda scare me. Not to mention the higher chance possibilities for men to cheat, no ring can prevent this thing not to happen, while women already sacrified their bodies to get destroyed in pregnancy and labour, that is the most horrible nightmare no woman wants to experience. Please listen to this and be considerate. Its hard to find a man to look at us as a humanbeing - not a commodity, not as a thing 🥺🥺
@windsofmarchjourneyperrytr28233 ай бұрын
They make male chastity belts. Lol.
@CatEyedGoddess9 ай бұрын
Many women throughout the decades didn’t want kids, but they had them because of lack of birth control and because of social norms. Women now have access to birth control and their own income. For me, I grew up with women who never wanted kids and I never wanted to be that miserable.
@ClayMastah344 Жыл бұрын
Women explain the reasons but people don’t listen to women so long as they’re getting what they want from them.
@evilds3261 Жыл бұрын
A requirement to do business with them should be that you have to listen to their concerns and sufficiently address and consider their concerns before you can begin negotiating with them.
@jennajewert Жыл бұрын
I was always ambivalent about having kids. I struggled a lot financially and then never found the right person to settle down with. Looking back, most of my adult life up until recently (I'm 47 now) was just focused on survival. It wasn't so much a choice as it was my circumstances at the time just didn't work out in my favor to become a mother. Now that I'm interested in becoming a mom, it's too late and I'm still single. Sometimes it's just not meant to be.
@okaySam Жыл бұрын
Acceptance is peace. You can still play a major role in children's lives in other ways..
@consciouscrypto3090 Жыл бұрын
Marry a guy with young kids and become a stepmom. My 'dad' was actually my stepdad. He was there from the time I was 7 and is the only real father I've known. You could be that for someone. Or adopt. Or use a surrogate. There are options. But you need to want it more to take those paths because the difficulty/sacrifice may be bigger.
@Tamar-sz8ox Жыл бұрын
I agree and God bless you ❤
@djangomarine6658 Жыл бұрын
You were focused on survival, but didn't realize that two incomes are better than one? Sounds more like you chose to "do bad all by yourself" instead of building with someone, but I'm glad you're doing well now and at peace with it. You can always do the step mom/adoption/coach thing.
@Nah-ah Жыл бұрын
To be fair, everyone is on survival mode, a lot of people accidentally have kids while surviving. I wasn’t planning on having a child when I was 22, but I did! While I was studying, working, plus caring for terminally ill grandmother at the time! It was the most defeating time of my life. And things weren’t going smoothly between my boyfriend and I at the time. But what do you know… when my daughter came along, her father and I put our differences aside and had to grow up and be adults bc our life wasn’t about us anymore. We’d have to survive together for our baby. It’s really hard to “surrender and let go” and believe me I went through that stage of feeling like a burden to my daughters father but he was like “nah I got you.” And he did!
@elsugga373611 ай бұрын
As a woman my main reason the childfree is that no man deserves me to go through 9 months of pain and suffering just to have 50% of his genes when he never contributed anything to the whole process. Adding to that, he can still decide to get up and leave at any moment
@playfulpanthress5 ай бұрын
There are EIGHT BILLION PEOPLE (and counting) in the world today. We don't NEED more humans. We, in the US, have over one hundred thousand children that are unwanted. Why aren't they talking about that? Why are they not suggesting people adopt?? Of a woman gets to an age where she can't have children safely (as safe as pregnancy can be, I mean) and suddenly regrets not having children, they can adopt. I thought I wanted children when I was younger, mostly because society tells me I'm supposed to. I'm so glad I waited!! I will never have (human) children, and I don't want them.
@Sarah-fg9ct8 ай бұрын
I love that it is two MEN discussing why women are not choosing to have children. Also, it takes two people to create a child...maybe these guys should be discussing why men are choosing not to have children. As a child free woman by choice, there are SO many reasons not to have children. Financial, physical, emotional, psychological...creating and raising a child is probably the most difficult thing to do in this current reality, and for what? These kids are being born into a dumpster fire. Women are smart to not have children at this time.
@millevenon5853 Жыл бұрын
Mathew is very wise. I also wouldn't want my daughter to be completely dependent on a guy with no room to escape
@inesarif8497 Жыл бұрын
That is literally how my dad raised me too. He always tells me probably all the time. “You have to have your own money, do not rely on anyone” that to me is good advice for me personally.
@KhadidjaKhadouj-ur4keАй бұрын
@@inesarif8497 Do you support the fifty-fifty system in marriage?
@annaclarke7643 Жыл бұрын
Women have been told what to do since Adam and Eve. Why these males think they know whats going on in females heads is beyond me. Free choice is what humans seek and is so precious.
@pastelmoon911810 ай бұрын
they dont they just do what their d* tells them to
@user-tx6lz7pm3y8 ай бұрын
Males know females better than females .
@suzy17507 ай бұрын
I thought that Matthew gave a very thoughtful and mature response and it kind of shut Chris down. :) The truth is that a lot of people will take what a man says more seriously, even if it's about a women's issue. If a woman said the exact same thing, many people would automatically say that she is selfish, bitter, deluded by feminists/TikToc/Chelsea Handler, etc. (BTW, not saying it's right that many people automatically give more weight to mens' opinions, just saying it's what is...)
@gdew9643 Жыл бұрын
This was a very sexist interview. Don't think he truly understands why women are making that option. It is not about being single and wild.
@gk33307 ай бұрын
And even if a woman does want to be single and wild let her be. Men are allowed to be 40+ living a bachelor lifestyle blowing there money on sex work but then woman aren’t allowed to do the same thing ? So backwards
@jayc3420096 ай бұрын
Everything is sexist to women, keep crying Karen.
@thecreativemillenial Жыл бұрын
rising cost of living, the large chunk child birth takes out of health insurance, demonization of single mothers, maternal mortality, demonization of low income families who use government support to feed their children, post natal depression, shall i go on?
@lilc53537 ай бұрын
Yes lol you shall...here let me help you. Baby daddy(s) drama, child support headache, bullying issues at school on school bus online, behavior issues up the wazoo, cost of daycare 👀, cost of diapers, people judging you for BREASTFEEDING!, dating disasters, potential danger in front yard due to predators, decisions to Vax or not to Vax and being judged no matter what you do. Oh the Joys of parenting 🙄 😂
@jayc3420096 ай бұрын
I mean...single motherhood should be discouraged. It is a massive strain on society.
@lightofall5 ай бұрын
@@lilc5353I really want to have children but cannot find a decent man
@ashreyayerica5 ай бұрын
Let's be real, There’s always gonna be enough women in the world who want to and will have children. This is not a concern for the planet. So for the ones who don't want it, let them breathe.
@anonyfamous426 ай бұрын
Many people should not have kids, only the best the stronguest the smartest and the most loving should
@emilyknowlton860210 ай бұрын
A woman who doesn't have a child and supports herself isn't hurting anyone. A woman who has children she can't afford and doesn't have support from the father places stress on her children, other people who now have to pay for them, and stress on herself. Yet society condemns the woman who responsibly takes care of herself and doesn't ask anyone for money, support or even acceptance.
@gemmisco Жыл бұрын
I love that Matthew also brings up men. I think the 8 out of 10 women who regret not having kids probably met guys who may not have wanted a family. It goes both ways. It’s a societal issue not just a woman issue.
@monishag89749 ай бұрын
even men don't want kids.
@monk4ever8 ай бұрын
We don't. Only $imps do.
@blacklyfe55438 ай бұрын
We do
@meatmachine449 Жыл бұрын
The world is too messed up to have kids… life is too expensive and the jobs don’t pay much…
@evilds3261 Жыл бұрын
Some people will try to argue with you by referring to their personal experiences, but their experiences are not always so relatable - thus, the people trying to prove you wrong completely miss the point and are just trying to substantiate a subjective narrative.
@dbs5555 ай бұрын
Animals in a situation of high stress and scarcity of critical resources will limit or forgo reproduction. Human animals are not immune to primal reactions.
@zingara76 Жыл бұрын
Women are not having kids because lots of us are from single parent households and growing up we did not wanted to be a single parent as we know how difficult it’s. It’s just been hard finding a partner that we feel could be a great partner or parent. I know lots of people are saying “HAVE KIDS” but come on do you want bunch a women just getting pregnant with out a good partner?
@JohnnyAmerique Жыл бұрын
Because you modern western women have absurdly unrealistic expectations with regard to men. We have average and in many cases even well below average women out here saying they “won’t settle” for anything less than a top 1% man. It’s just flatly delusional. Then they hit the wall in their 30’s, and the average men they turned their noses up at in their 20’s are either already taken or aren’t interested, because those guys who do want a family don’t want a ran through, past-her-prime woman whose fertile years are in the past, and who spent her best years at the club, getting her back blown out by Chad and Tyrone.
@djangomarine6658 Жыл бұрын
There are plenty of good partners. A recent survey said 63% of men are single right now. If that's your excuse then maybe you're expectations just don't match with reality.
@chriscampbell9191 Жыл бұрын
Millions of women in the US are already doing what you asked about at the end of your comment. It's reality.
@naviifra2374 Жыл бұрын
@@djangomarine6658most of those a probably not good partners
@manifest2203 Жыл бұрын
@@djangomarine6658 just because 63% of men are single, doesn’t mean that they will be good partners. Most men don’t even have basic lifeskills (like cooking, cleaning, personal hygiene, laundry). Getting with these men means more work and drama (STDs and so on) for the woman.
@WilliamCo-oy7ge7 күн бұрын
I didn’t intent to not have kids. Just didn’t fight the partner. I’m 40 and now I’m grateful for it. Kids seem like a nightmare
@TAGraham Жыл бұрын
SPOILER: nothing outside of your self will make you happy, not even a kid
@nhl4264 Жыл бұрын
500% true! No one can be content based on things that could be taken away anytime. What people are yearning for is a fix to fill the void inside.
@nicholasphelps3872 Жыл бұрын
No, genetic failure is the ultimate failure. Britain as a nation is experiencing this due to artificially lowered confidence of white Britons by the criminal left. Resist them, it feels really good to.
@fromthesouthofafrica6815 Жыл бұрын
Cope. Human beings don't have completely independent identities.
@TAGraham Жыл бұрын
@@fromthesouthofafrica6815 sounds like a big generalization, zero humans?
@fromthesouthofafrica6815 Жыл бұрын
@@TAGraham Yes, zero humans.
@bsmartcoaching6 ай бұрын
I think all women respect motherhood. You pick the most extreme examples of woman who have chosen to be childfree. It's a tough job. I've never encountered a woman who bashed another woman for having children UNLESS the circumstances under which they are bringing the child into world aren't favorable for the child. If you want to know why women don't want kids ask a woman. It's rich that these two men are speculating on this subject. Woman arent having kids because they don't want to. Most end up being single parents- hardest life EVER! It is financially prohibitive to have children. The world is a literal cesspool- dirty air, dirty soil, and dirty water. Most of us have plastic in our bodies. Climate change-- it's real and generations to come will suffer because of it. Countries spend billions on war but have no resources for parents, like childcare, safe schools and laws and a society that protect children from mass shootings and child preditors. There are so many reasons why women aren't having children. Motherhood is a thankless job that the world is content to watch women struggle alone while doing it. Do you need more reasons? I have plenty. Woman support women who have children. Now it's time to support those who chose not to.
@GoldenArmory Жыл бұрын
You couldn't pay me a billion to have children. Why bring innocent children into HELL? This is an evil world.
@TonyHeslington7 ай бұрын
The world is what you make it.
@daleburrows26622 ай бұрын
@@TonyHeslington "the world is what you make of it" what an incredibly ignorant thing to write. So if a baby's dying of cancer, that's just what the baby made of it????
@1675loof Жыл бұрын
Imagine talking about this as if it's an issue when we are 8billion parasite on the planet.
@kiranmajid9476 Жыл бұрын
It’s not just that women don’t want to have kids. Some of us are struggling to find the right man to have them with
@Bluudclaat Жыл бұрын
That’s not what’s being pushed in pop-culture though
@Charlotte_Martel Жыл бұрын
Exactly. I happened to have found one of the last traditional men, and we have a lovely family. However, my nephews and one of my sons are absolutely committed to never having children, and one of them is in his 30s.
@brent4073 Жыл бұрын
This is why the sexual revolution was a failure. There are often times men who want children ending up with women who dont and vice versa. It wastes everyone's time.
@eucliduschaumeau8813 Жыл бұрын
Take time to know someone inside and out before you make a commitment. The longer you know someone before you commit, the better the relationship will be in the end. Stay away from addicts, narcissists and fools.
@eucliduschaumeau8813 Жыл бұрын
@@Bluudclaat Pop "culture" in 2023 is degenerate trash. Nobody should be following that.
@zwatwashdc Жыл бұрын
Why have kids just to have them raised by poorly paid strangers?
@arewahaircaretv8718 Жыл бұрын
A lot of people with kids ain't honest enough to admit quite a lot of them regret having kids. I would rather regret not having kids than regret having kids. I seen a man pretend to buy something then run off n leave 4 kids to the shop keeper.
@YouYou-sm8tf Жыл бұрын
True. Many women get their body change (weight gain, stretch mark ) and sexual activity insatisfaction after childbirth.... most marriage face crisis during pregnancy and childbirth. Some will act like they are fine, many don’t...
@deeporter7369 Жыл бұрын
I have read a few articles from various sources that state 40 - 60 % of women with kids...wish they would have waited or not had them at all. Many will never admit it.
@covfefe_drumpfh Жыл бұрын
@@deeporter7369 at first I thought I should had waited. But now being in my mid 30's with an adolescent son made me realized I did good in not waiting too much.
@danatsaneva7935 Жыл бұрын
@@deeporter7369 I admit it. I have a kid and I've never been more miserable. And it's only for life...
@SP-ml3bs2 ай бұрын
I have mental illness and have always intuitively known that I could not handle the non-stop 24/7 18+ year responsibility, exhaustion, anxiety, overwhelm and financial obligation of parenting. I would love my kids so much that I would spend every second awake worrying about them and that would cause my health to get worse. I am in my 40's and happily married to my wonderful husband whom I've been with for almost 23 years and we are so glad to be child-free. Also, I witnessed my married parents who raised my brother and I. They were miserable, unhappy and argued all the time about money and that was back in the 80's and 90's. Things are harder for parents nowadays.
@jones2277 Жыл бұрын
No one is demonizing motherhood. Stop it, Chris!
@1675loof Жыл бұрын
Well if it's demonized . That's deserved because motherhood is hell.they don't like the truth
@LrlTriCat Жыл бұрын
I'm childfree by choice. It's costs almost $300,000 to raise a child to the age of 18. If I ever want a chance of retirement why would I have kids? Also climate change will leave a much worse world for future generations, no way am I raising a kid while the world burns.
@Nah-ah Жыл бұрын
Those of us who struggled with mental health issues stemming from childhood trauma from our own parents will have conflicting thoughts and feelings on wanting to have kids. I know I did! When I became a mum, the things that triggered my own mother about me, triggered me about my daughter.
@Nah-ah Жыл бұрын
@@LenAnderson856 oh boy… where do I start..? Ok so the big trigger for me was feeling like my daughter was a burden. And being perceived that way as a child by my own mother is hard to be consciously aware of as an adult until becoming a mother/parent. I’ve been going to therapy for just over 10 yrs now and the “rewiring” was a very slow process bc this form of abuse happened in my formative yrs. Kids will reflect to you what is unhealed from what your parents caused.
@Asto508 Жыл бұрын
Certainly agree. The reason why I don't want children, apart from the rational disadvantages, is that my mother turned out to be the worst example of a woman for a young boy to grow up with. The best part is if these parents complain afterwards that they won't get any grand-children, seemingly completely oblivious to the fact that they are one of the main reasons themselves.
@VentureCreek Жыл бұрын
sounds like it has nothing to do with your daughter or your mother.
@Nah-ah Жыл бұрын
@@VentureCreek sounds like you don’t know me at all.
@Nah-ah Жыл бұрын
@@Asto508 I agree. My husband, nor my daughter has met my mum. She passed away and I felt like I never got an apology. Some of the things she’s done including go after my older sister with a machete and injuring her, she should have been locked up and put away for life. This is a woman that walked out on my siblings and I, me being 16 months old at the time and then wanting us to move in with her when I was 8. She just enjoyed having us around but wouldn’t dare want us to speak or ask for things that we needed and when we did she yelled at us for being too needy. What child isn’t?! I found myself silencing my daughter and ignoring her, literally doing the exact same thing my mum used to do. My sister and I eventually got kicked out when we were 12. This was after she threatened to “sell” us to the old expat men for money! Yeahhh really wanna be a parent after experiencing all that! These women can’t blame you for not wanting kids!
@Wetterwet Жыл бұрын
I got a vasectomy when I was in my mid 20s. Don’t regret it yet ! I remember feeling that I didn’t want children when I was 11-12. That feeling never went away.
@eucliduschaumeau8813 Жыл бұрын
Same here. I found babies to be the most annoying creatures on earth when I was a kid. I've been married happily for thirty-six years and we don't regret not having kids at all. We chose to travel instead and go on adventures.
@apple1231230 Жыл бұрын
On the off chance you ever change your mind, adoption is always an option
@Wetterwet Жыл бұрын
For sure. Just dogs for now
@AbuBased731 Жыл бұрын
No ẞl00dline? ẞl00dline Ended LOL
@skylinefever Жыл бұрын
@@AbuBased731 Oh well, maybe not every strand of DNA needs replication.