hands in the bucket if u have watched this before a first date hahaha

proof that confidence can make any shirt look good

1. Touch early and often (the longer you wait the more awkward it gets) (being warm is not being desperate) 2. Don’t sit opposite each other (it immediately gets awkward) park bench style allows you to people watch or not be forced to look at each other during silent moments. 3.do something that involves actual external focus, especially if you aren’t a conversation expert)

Dude im going on a date in 2 hours i feel like im going to war 😂😂😂😂

Don't have a date tonight, tomorrow or maybe even next month, just watching these dating videos just in case.

I have been binge watching date vids my first date is in an hour! Wish me luck

I'm going on a zoom date do to quarantine and the first tip is "TOUCH EARLY AND OFTEN"

These are really great tips for people with social anxiety.

I have a Date tomorrow and im so nervous. Im quite a shy person and im so scared of arkward silence Edit: holy shit I never realized that this had so many comments. So for everyone asking, that was my first date (I was 16 or 17). I think it went better than expected, there was no awkward silence. No we didn’t end up in a relationship.

''don't sit opposite each other'' AMEN! finally someone said that, thank you. I find it so awkward

This was actually so sweet. He’s not a skeevy pick up artist or trying to take advantage of anxious/ socially awkward people. He’s just trying to help and giving real practical tips it’s so refreshing and comforting to see well intentioned and logical people like this

1 - Touch early and often. 2 - Don't sit opposite each other. Sit next to them. 3 - Do something that involves having external focus, particularly if you are bad at conversation. Such as a walk, hike, or just watching people on a bench.

About a month ago I went out on a date with a man that I knew was shy. We went to a nice restaurant that was quiet and we sat directly across from one another. Typically I am not a quiet person but I was feeding off of him. We sat there miserable for less then 1 hour and then I went home. After listening to this I called him back up and asked him if he wanted to go for a motorcycle ride. I was shocked that he said yes. But it was perfect. I sat behind him and talked into his ear and got to rub his back and make that first physical connection to let him know I was interested and he was able to get comfortable enough talking to me without having to stare straight at me. This was brilliant! By the time we got back from our road trip and were face to face again we had 3 hours of conversation and 3 hours of things we could look back on and talk about. "Wow wasn't that waterfall amazing it reminded me of this one time..." Great advice, keep it coming. ;)

Shows up to first date, extends arms out: "Hug?.." *3 sec pause* "No? okay.." :(

Me: "Hey, how are you? How was your day?" Them: "Not bad, How was yours?" Me: " Pretty good, I spent half the morning watching documentaries and coming up with new recipes for my job's menu." Them: "Oh, that sounds fun." Me: "So what do you like to do in your down time? Do you have any hobbies or interests?" Them: " I just chilled and hung out." Me: "Um... Well that sounds fun... What do you like to do when you chill?" Them: "I like to hang out." Me: "Oh that sounds fun. I like to cook and travel. I'd like to go to Spain sometime. Have you traveled much?" Them: "No not really." Me: "um.... Okay.... What kind of music do you like?" Them: "I listen to everything." Me: "Uhhh.... Okay... I like a lot of different types of music too. I'm a huge fan of Classic rock, grunge and classical music. It helps me relax since it has some meaning behind it." Them: "Ohhh..." Me: "Okay, fuck this."

“If you initially see him and give him a hug” *laughs in corona*

just take a shot before a date !

I don't even have a date wtf am I doing here.

Maybe I am old fashioned, but I HATE kissing on the first or second date especially with someone you met online. A kiss is something pretty intimate and I feel like it says "I am interested in you in a sexual way, and I want to see you again". But with someone you have never met before, or someone you don't know that well, I feel like the first couple dates should be about getting to know that person as a human being, and seeing if you are even attracted to that person in the first place- ITS MORE THAN "oh hes hot". I had a REAALLLY bad first date the other day, where he was nice at first, and we did something super fun and adventurous, but then immediately was turned off because he constantly tried kissing and hugging me. It ruined it, ruined the first impression and now I refuse to see this person. Whereas a guy I dated 3 years, we went on many dates before we kissed, and as I began to become attracted to him, I think it made me more excited to see him and I anticipated that moment more.

I've done the sit beside thing a number of times before. It actually helps immensely with the touch aspect. Reaching out across the table to touch her is rather creepy, but if you're sitting beside her it can come a lot more naturally.

The underside of his face and his voice are almost identical to Daniel Radcliff.

getting ready for my first date, oh my world im so nervous

The more you worry about the date being awkward the more it gets awkward. Never have a goal at the end of the night.. not even a kiss. Always have the mind set of just meeting a new friend and you will be 100% less nervous. When you make expectation you are worried about not meeting those expectations. If your a bad talker then go to the movies or a concert.. a place where talking isnt 100% necessary. If your naturally a nervous person on dates than dont be shy about letting the person know. Breaking that bridge can help the other make you feel better, just dont apologize a shit ton if you say stupid things. Being confident even if you fake it is key

this is great! kind of knew these already but a great refreshener. 1. introduce physical contact early on so touching becomes more natural and not awkward, e.g. when you meet them give them a hug or a peck on the cheek as well as little touches here and there 2. don't sit opposite each other, if there's a silence it will be more awkward because you dont know where to look, if you sit next to each other and there's a silence you can just look at the surroundings together 3. if you're nervous or shy use the external stimuli/activity (museum, park) to create conversation

Imagine dating the actual Matthew Hussey. So much pressure lol

i asked a guy out and we had the best first date EVER! it was instant chemistry after knowing him for around 4 months but just as friends, and we talked for HOURS and time flew by. we sat side by side, and it never felt awkward. im still seeing him! Edit: omg... how am I just seeing this 6 years later!!!!!! You guys are awesome. We broke up after 3 years.... but we were fairly compatible for most of it. Our life goals were just too different. I wanted kids and he didn’t... now I’m with the love of my life and we met on bumble!

Best tips I've heard. Usually its just "Be yourself", "Don't be nervous" etc.

I did this unintentionally at the first date with my first boyfriend. We immediately clicked and I always wondered why I never had that with other guys. Now thinking back of this date I realize what I did wrong the following dates after my first boyfriend.

I like the shirt he's wearing, it looks easy to tear off

I'm so nervous.

First date coming fellas and she's exactly my type. Wish me luck

Great video! I love the bluntness "the worse you are at conversation the more external focus you need"

jesus christ i wish i had have watched this before my date hahaha

How do u even touch him? I cant even look him in the eye

If you have chemistry the date will go 100 Times better. Nothing worse than a first date where you are like “yeaaaa no this isn’t going to work” lol.

Great points being made here. I still have things to work on but wanted to share this. Sometimes I find it helpful during an awkward silence to simply take a few slow deep breaths and just let the chips fall where they may. Sometimes a positive topic will just generate and keep things flowing. It also puts you in a state of relaxation which your date will notice and feed off of as well. Also, find something to compliment her on, like her shirt, jewelry, her hair style, lipstick, her speaking voice, etc. It shows that you’re noticing her appearance and can make her feel more at ease.

So true about the 0 to 60 on a first date kiss. On a blind date once I hadn't anticipated the kiss since we hand't really had much physical contact throughout the date. Then at the end he just pulled me in and kissed me. Sounds romantic right? Well it wasn't. I was like "WTF!?" and my instant reaction was to push him off me. The date ended so awkwardly...

I hate first dates

My first date is tomorrow i wanna ✨pass away✨

I do truly have to say the first thing he says about touch early is so spot on. I do that and it relieves alot of tension early

Matthew just looks like a really jacked Daniel Radcliffe

Wow those tricks are actually game changing

Man I’m sad I even had to look this up

I haven't been on a first date yet but from my experience talking to guys it's always easier to have something to resort to when things get awkward, such as a game. Something as simple as just asking random questions to each other, because you can figure stuff out about them, talk about it, and then if there's ever an awkward pause, then you just be like, "ok your turn".

If it's a restaurant and a 4 sided table, sit at 90 degrees to him. Easier to see the face and yet people watch, etc. I've done that and it's much more comfortable and makes it easier to have a conversation.

The fact about sitting adjacent to each other actually sounds brilliant to me, didn't even think of that. I pictured my first "date" with someone I've known for a while as us, sitting completely opposite of each other and now I can see how impractical it is in comparison to sitting next to, or adjacent to each other. I imagine it's more freeing.

Boys, just came back. It was really nice. I was like nervous in the begining, but then it was smooth conversation.

Sitting opposite each other is also known to be seen as more formal and intimidating. I remember in my peer counselling classes we were told to sit in a sort of 45 degree angle next to each other so that it's comforting and less intimidating to the other person.

that second one is especially smart.

great advice except don't go for a walk by a river or in the park unless you're confident you will be safe ... remember, you don't know this date!

I’m impressed on how much he knows and how objective his facts are

Matthew thank you so much. You helped me get out and over a abusive relationship.to being comfortable with my self. To opening my heart to moving to my first date ! Thank you again. Keep being amazing

who the hell sits side by side at dinner ?

Won't it seem weird to sit directly next to someone on a first date though?

"a great river" that is so humble and sweet

The best dates i had was when i haven't sat in front of a guy. I never noticed that until now

This was so helpful! This is perfect for shy girls like me. 💗

This is such great advice! All of the awkward dates I've had were because of the mistakes you talked about. I will definitely be using these tips before my next first date.

I used the touch often tip! Set my timer to beep every ten minutes then we have to touch. She loved it, worked great.

I'm going to put this on all the posts I watched. I watched this video the morning of my first date and it helped a tonne. Stories about my life I was struggling to think of beforehand but funny ones came to me during the date just as I needed it. If you ever start discussing something negative, always turn it positive with a funny story. Make her laugh, never sit opposite if you can. Always get there before her. The bouncers gave me one last tip before the date arrived. I was standing in the cold lol. Don't wait outside; it makes you look desperate. Also how you feel, she feels so push away nerves by talking to those around you before she arrives and familiarising yourself with the environment. Make bets with her and lose so she can buy you a drink too. Let her repay the evening with only a drink/ice cream or whatever during the same date (she should offer). Go kino EARLY. Start with a hug, she may or may not choose a peck. Be decisive but a gentleman e.g. about when to eat or do things etc. Don't ask her where she wants to go, have things planned out. Flow in conversation. Move environments, even if it's seats in the same bar. Have things planned like a competitive or team work activity that allows you to interact. Gentle taps on her shoulder whilst laughing, briefly move your hand over hers and let go whilst your both laughing. But don't go too early on this, it has to set up a relationship for a bit. So maybe an hour in if it's going well. Move in close sitting next to her. Maybe even lean close to say something funny (make sure your mouth hygiene is impeccable. Floss, Use a tongue cleaner/scraper with tongue gel and ultradex to be sure). If it's going well you should have tonnes to talk about. Someone here said FORD family, occupation, recreation, dreams. Don't reveal too much about yourself if you want a second date. Tease her a little, to break down her wall but don't make her feel insecure. Compliment something she has done e.g. hair/worn rather than a feature of her body. Never compliment makeup; the reasons for that should be obvious. If the date is successful she'd set up the second one in some way, it might be mentioning she's doing something for charity etc. Take interest in HER. Generally if things are going well, her eyes won't wander, this is why it is so important you set up an environment you're comfortable with. The worse you are with conversation, the more external focus you need e.g. bowling to fill the gaps/tour a stately home, palace together or go on a boat ride. Point out similarities between you rather than differences. Choose DIFFERENT drinks to her on purpose after asking what she's having to show you have a mind of your own. Do something spontaneous at least once during the date like do something you're both willing to do to make you both embarrassed like dance randomly for a few seconds on your way out. It will show her CONFIDENCE and fun and exciting. You'll only have confidence if you calm your nerves that's why I'll say it again, talk to people around you and make small talk to compose yourself before the date. Finally go kino again at the end, with a hug, hopefully she'll give you the peck this time. Remember the aim of the first date is NOT to get a kiss (that's a Hollywood thing), but instead, a second date with her. Hopefully it's her that sets you up. Walk her to wherever she's going to get her ride home. Be a gentleman and put your arm round her, asking her if she doesn't mind you bringing her close if she's cold. Finally after an hour or two text to ask if she got home safely, she'll probably text saying she had a lovely time before that though. Give her a chance to do it though. Resist the urge to text her the next day before she does. Resist a further urge to text back straight away. That urge will be the hardest you've done. Respond with things that follow up on things you talked about during the date. Make her feel good about herself but always make yourself the prize and like a kitten, she'll keep interest in the ball of wool. Never boast though. I learned so much in one night and can't believe how many years I feared this day... And it went beautifully. She set up the next date. I just want to thank all of you in the comments section and the creator of this video who literally changed my life. Don't be put off if it goes bad, not everyone is made for each other and it is better you break off and stay friends than force something that won't work. Take it all slow. Don't be disheartened. Perfect practise makes perfect. Good luck brothers.

I'm having first date tomorrow.. Wish me luck

Or take some shots of vodka for confidence and everythig will be gucchy

It's my first time hearing that advise, "not sit opposite with each other", and I was like "oh so that's why!" because often times it feels more like an interview rather than a casual conversation hahaha.

I have a date in.. Four hours, so I'm basically binging all of these videos. 😂

wow, that sitting next to them tip is pure genius!

Dude this video is deadass helpful. Honestly wasn't even expecting that 😂

Sitting beside each other on a date is so underrated. It makes things 10 times less intimidating and awkward, stellar tip!

Bro your voice is so calming it honestly helped me get calm

I am heading out on a first date to go feed the ducks and walk along the river. Thanks for the advice!

Going on my first date in two hours and I feel so confident now!! We are going to the cinema wich has a lot of external activity of course, and after we’re eating sushi! The sushi restaurant has the benches that allow us to sit next to each other. If the restaurant seems full, I’ll convince him to sit on the benches

Watched this video before a date last night & I literally knocked it out the park! TOUCH EARLY & OFTEN IS KEY.

Well done to these tips. Tried & tested steps 1 & 2. I must admit that I had to put in some discipline to go through with both. But they both set the tone for a smooth and an enjoyable date. And guess what? Yes we agreed to meet for the 2nd date. Just what I needed to know. Thanks.... keep them coming

given that he gives dating advice, mr hussey must spit some pretty good game to catch his prey

GENIUS! how didn't i think of that !?

The touch thing makes sense, but personally if I JUST met someone and this was our first date I wouldn't really want them to touch me. I'm not much of a touch person in general, even with friends it takes me a long time to warm up to the hug stage of our relationship. But I can see myself being more comfortable with it if I've met them and interacted with them a few times previously.

This was straight to the point. Thank you.

Omg, I hugged him BEFORE I saw this video! We ended up talking for over five hours and we want to see each other again

Start the date with a hug. Good start :)

You are spot on about relationship issues. I've listened to a lot of your videos and you are spot on.

I really needed this cause I'm awkward as hell

Went on my first date last night with a guy I've liked forever, mine wasn't awkward at all bc we've known each other forever and been friends. I saw this in my sub bar for KZfaq and watching it explains why it wasn't awkward thanks for helping me to understand why this one worked so much better than the others

I can just recall one of my awkward dating mistakes. You definitely hit it right Matthew!

I couldn't agree more and those tips are golden for people like me who tends to get really nervous on dates

Matthew this little tricks to deal first dates is amazing .. thank u so much for sharing, I am a kind of person who is good listener but this gestures are really amazing to know .. thank u

''just give a hug' its actually harder than you think lmao

This literally helped me so much❤️

Watching this with my friend, I hope he nails it! Thank you doctor Matthew

Good advice...I hope I have the courage to use it.

My girlfriend of almost 9 months and I's first date was a movie (My actual first date ever). We had talked nonstop 24/7 for a month before the date but I could not get her to go out with me lol. She was and still is a pretty shy person. But when we met at the theater I didn't give her a hug, I wanted to, but I didn't want to seem pushy. During the movie she kept touching my arm to get me to hold her hand or touch her but i wasn't catching on. Eventually i talked myself into it and put my hand out for her to grab, and after that it was all over. It was so peaceful, and i had felt a connection i had never felt before. But the date wasn't awkward at all, because we already knew everything about each other. I would highly suggest at least texting someone for a week or so before the first date. At least that's what seemed to help me.

Totally did these things on my first date last night...it was great! Touched early and often was the best advice

I needed this video! Man the internet is a life hack!

My first date ever is in 4 days and is with this short cute quiet girl. We already have a nice inside joke to goof around with from our initial texting, which I think can always help.

OMG this helps so much thank you

You provide such amazing advice! I never would have thought of what you mentioned in the video!

Brilliant Matthew -- thank you. I have a first date this weekend and I'm anxious to try all three tips!

Hahah just got home from my best first date ever! We hugged right away and touch was so natural and Intentional the entire time. We sat next to each other at both restaurants we went to and ate korean bbq so we had to cook the food ourselves which was a great external distraction. The only thing that didnt work was the darn t shirt line from your other video! Lol 😆 may work on some other guys but this guy did not get it ....he thought it was an insult until i explained and had to confess it was a line.i think our more frank and honest conversation was more our speed but i truly appreciate all your tips and advice for us all in the dating world. ❤❤❤ Thank you!

I don't know why am i watching this after a date! 😅

these are some simple yet amazing advice right here

This is making me more anxious!!!

You supposed to kiss at the end? I think I'll die if I kiss this early 😂