circle of life

he's got that dawg inside him, he just needs to be sure he can defeat the dawg outside him

Just hope it’s never a panda

it's called a midlife crisis

i'm stuck here laughing like a little girl at this comment thank you for making my day

Dont make eye contact with him

have we ever seen ryan's 23andme? Like are we sure he's not 50% floridian?

Every time, every Librarian video has some fucking insane top comment

Bald, Deranged Canadian. Excuse you.

r/AITA I (23M) am in the airport absolutely crying laughing as a deranged Canadian man describes in great detail how we would annihilate his neighbor's dog

Lost it at that as well.

That line was comedy gold tbh

definitely cracked me up as well

shit killed me too lmao

i had no idea this guy is this good. i'm in

someone make this a short film now

Because we have no centralised understanding of how this shit works, which is what maybe policymaking might fix, one corporation makes a killing and forms their own reality where it's nothing but situations that sound like an episode of Billy & Mandy

Yeah, it baffles me that redditors will shred someone for not tipping enough when the drivers get to decide if they want to take the order or not. Like, if the tip isnt enough dont do the delivery. And if you don't make a living doing freelance deliveries, get a normal job? Then I remember that I'm on reddit and the people commenting are the peak of retardation

capitalism is fundamentally broken

When I doordash on the east coast I make about $30/hr with an average of 5% tip

@@iplay9sdamn really? Do you get paid based on order size or distance or like a combo? Or just hourly?

+2

my favorite doordash red card story is when a customer wanted me to buy several pounds of turkey breast, which is priced by weight and therefore didn't show up on what had been prepaid into the redcard for that order. I hopped on the line with them and they deadass asked if I would pay $90 out of pocket to complete the order, to which I said no, and the customer service lady was like "oh. well, if you're not able to afford that, that's too bad. My other drivers would have paid for it themselves, but I guess for you we'll just have to cancel it instead." I love getting poor-shamed for not wanting to just lose 90 bucks for no reason lol

It's not just that they're not setup to receive payment it's that the restaurant may not have agreed at all to work with doordash. Doordash uses whatever menu they found online to set prices but if the prices changed the card may not have enough on it to pay for the order.

Same fam it took me fucking 20 minutes into a different city has happened like twice with two different addresses so frustrating 😭😭😭😭

he loves killing dogs

the amount of doordash drivers ive had who cant use the gps on their phone is crazy to me. the doordash gps at my old address sent u one block away from where i was. i always put in the notes to call when they were a few minutes away so I could be outside ready to flag them down. still half of the drivers never did that and would have to ask for directions. and when I would explain how to get there using cross streets (the streets were a perfect grid by me) they would just say “idk where that street is”. dude pull over and open up google maps… it’s crazy man! Delivery apps are crazy bc every single person involved in the interaction is having a negative experience. The workers get paid garbage, the customers get cold food at gouged prices, and the business itself is still somehow hemorrhaging money. Everybody loses

it was either this or killing moms, so it's good he replaced isaac with SAP

they wanted you to come to them because we don't get paid for that extra mileage, on top of you could claim you never got the order because the dasher marked it delivered 10 min away from your address. they were just trying to make sure they weren't being scammed

They know.. the dasher doesn't want to cancel on their end cause it's bad for them. So they try to scam you into cancelling on your end and pay for it.

@@bobson_dugnutt that's not true at all. It's not bad for us, it just is annoying because we have to contact customer support and wait for them to answer, either call the restaurant or the customer, and cancel the order, which can take quite a long time. Cancelling on the customer's end is, comparably, much quicker. Either way we get the same amount of pay, half pay for a cancelled order. I'm also pretty sure all you have to do to get your money back is contact customer support, and explain why you cancelled. Or cancel through customer support (which, albeit will take awhile, but tbf, you're asking the dasher to go through the same wait, only we're losing money because of it (time = money while dashing))

@@98loud Most customers don’t know that when they cancel it charges them the full amount. And they also don’t know how to cancel for free. I lost about $30 before I figured it out. And it takes the same amount of time for a dasher as a customer. You talk to customer support. If you’re going to ask a customer to cancel I think dashers should at least explain how

​​@@98loudI'm sure it's annoying but I'm sure you can see if the reason is the dasher fucked up the food it's on them to cancel. The customer didn't ask anything in the vid, it was the dasher asking. Time is money for everyone.. if you're delivering to some lawyer who's busy with a $200/hour client does that means you're the one who should cancel then? Cause his time's worth more money than yours.

@@bobson_dugnutt i wasn't talking about any particular instance, just in general, what you said isn't true. But yes, the lawyer will continue earning money if he does not get his food. I will not if I'm not getting orders. Me delivering someone food doesn't affect their business, me being unable to deliver others food while dealing with canceling an order affects mine. Fwiw, btw, I generally cancel my own orders (usually because the restaurant doesn't hand me the order for whatever reason) but can understand why someone would ask a customer to.

+2

Listen, I've probably thought about killing dogs- in self-defense! - about as much as NL. I think it just happens to your brain when you're attacked by them as kids. I just personally find it very funny that he'd say this insane shit out loud. I tried running this shit past a friend once and they looked at me like I was Hitler. After that, I realized this is just one of those things that you should keep in the dome.

The reason you see normal people being killed by animals is because they have no intent to kill. Out of fight, flight, and freeze, people usually end up trying flight and freeze. If you get someone from the start who thinks it's a life or death encounter and goes at that dog with killing intent, they win for sure. (although not without taking serious harm)

I think this whole dog fighting thing reveals that people are so afraid of being overconfident in their ability to fight that they have to compensate by being extremely under confident in their ability to fight, to the point where they greatly overestimate the strength of small animals beyond reason. Even the strongest dogs would get crushed by any adrenaline-fuelled adult with the intent to fight.

@@lr-this is it. Through the years we de-evolved our speed (general public) but still have weight and size. You can literally fucking snap a dogs neck or leg in half by stomping on it Lmfao ain’t no way a dog is going to kill me and walk away from it

​@styxrakash4639 im pretty confident most adults could step on a dog and tear its leg off with a medium amount of effort, but the thing is that we'll never need to do that so i get why some people don't believe this

0 empathy. Canceling can hurt their rate which can matter for some folks income. They are just doing their job and you want the order canceled, then you should do it. The card thing is because the charged rate was over the approved rate. They aren't trying to scam you or anything

@@JamFlexx I didn’t want the order cancelled, I wanted my food still but the driver said the Postmate card was declined and wanted me to call the store to pay with my own card. But also wanted me to cancel on the app which would charge me full price plus I would no longer be able to track the order.

I loved Avengers 1 too, but trust me bro you're not the Hulk. And if that dog is half as strong as Loki youre fucked.

People who think a healthy adult human being couldn’t kill most dogs are genuinely out of their minds

What are you Andre the giant just simply grabbing an 80 pound dog and slamming it à la donkey kong

LOL someone has never been bit full force by a real size dog. Unless you have some ACTUAL training, if a real size dog aggressively bites you full force your lizard brain will automatically take over and you will forget every single plan you had and turn to fearful shrieking and flailing. The difference between a playful dog bite (or human bite) and a full force real size dog bite is like the difference between taking a whiffle bat to the head and taking a MLB swung Maplewood bat to the dome.

​@@davidlazerz8564exactly, noone knows how their fight or flight will react unless they have specific training(crisis response). But even then they train you so you overcome your own innate senses, so it's not even a guarantee! So if that's still unreliable a normie getting bit by a dog is extra unreliable

it was murdered by a flood a chatgpt writing prompt stories

he kept emphasizing that it was truly fucking dead with no chance of returning then realized there were other subreddits to react to i guess

@@TheLibraryofLetourneau Bald man discovers content on internet: *surprised pikachu face*

He stopped doordashing

he tells it so often

Imagine being so helpless that you have to spend $30+ on lukewarm shitty food. Imagine being so pathetic you harass customers when the tip isn’t $10 while working less than minimum wage. DoorDash is full of losers on both sides man

Sib thats a lady

can't believe they're trans now

Company pays less than minimum wage, workers give less than minimum effort. Paying shit wages and relying on the gamble of customer tips means all the REALLY good drivers get filtered out soon after they naively join, leaving only the severely dimwitted who happily bash their head into the wall for 8 hours a day at $3 per 30 minute order or the malicious who abuse the system to make up the difference.

its just the membership on youtube, i chose a very stupid name for members

Always gotta be ready

reading :)

Yes, all Americans think like that, you’re so wise for generalizing an entire country of hundreds of millions of people.

@@macsweene I didn't say all Americans think like that, but it is a uniquely American mindset which derives from the nation's very foundations.

​@@idot3331Ignore them, literally every American has met the "I'LL SHOOT YA IF YA TRESPASS SONNY I'M A REAL MURRICAN" guy once in their life. Idk why they're acting like it has to either be all of us doing it or none of us doing it.

You sound like a pervert

Fake story and if it isn't you're the asshole

you've held a grudge against everyone for 15 years because a guy was understandably annoyed he barely got compensated for a delivery?

​@@twitchytyrant i don't think you understand how much more fifty percent is than the expected tip, also fuck tip culture lol, how about fight for livable wages instead

@@guymann1660 for sure, i'll bring it up next time the PA general assembly hits my line

giving women unsolicited compliments at inappropriate times is very gross especially complete strangers

They didn’t say they were a pervert, just that they sound like a pervert. Also after how much you wrote defending this guy you sound like a pervert.

@@biggrimace6506 "unsolicited compliments" again I have to completely disagree with this mindset. When a stranger compliments me, it makes my day. Saying something nice about someone =/= sexual harassment, that's just an incredibly paranoid and toxic attitude to have. how does one "solicit" a compliment in the first place? like that's just not even how human conversation works. "You can only say something nice about me if I give you explicit permission beforehand" like, jesus christ this is a stretch lol

@@Phoenix0F8 you must be quite the close minded male to have such a perspective and total inability to comprehend this

@@Phoenix0F8 Keep in mind I have zero life experience, haven't gone outside in a month, 0 bitches: But I feel like when I see these weird ass screenshots of messages by dudes saying "You're beautiful" or smth, I just imagine like a 45 year old dude with the internet etiquette of a boomer who hasn't learned that there's a difference between saying shit IRL and online. Like there's a stigmatization of compliments that has been rightly earned by weirdos sending anonymous messages and they just haven't realized it yet. Obviously being a boomer isn't a pass to not be a creep but it feels like they're just generally unaware of the implications their words have. Like yes being complimented shouldn't come with a terms of agreement before hand but I'm assuming you're a dude like me and obviously we can't relate at all to how a woman feels when they get a message like that. I mean come on, even imagining some older dude messaging me that right now would make me think : "Is this guy a pedophile?" And I'm 22.