HFY Story : Please, don't drag humans into this conflict | 2212 ~Deathworld, War, Terran and Humans

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HFY Story : Please, don't drag humans into this conflict | 2212 ~Deathworld, War, Terran and Humans

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Agro Squirrel Narrates

Күн бұрын

Пікірлер: 456

@Lucian00311 11 ай бұрын

Alien: "Don't give them a reason to use us as target practice for their untested arsenal." A bunch of human researchers: "Aww come on!"

@ussenterprisecv6805 11 ай бұрын

Random Human captain "But Siiiir, I have a new toy please let them shoot me, I promise I will be nice"

@Netscape-kd6mg 11 ай бұрын

@@ussenterprisecv6805 it'll only tear a hole in the spacetime continium according to the manual. don't you wantt to know aswell? pleeease 🥺🥺

@Kadaj616 11 ай бұрын

"No captain ! Otherwise we would be forced to add one more thing to Gen. Con. I dont want to to make it into Geneva Checklist"

@phillipk4196 11 ай бұрын

@@Kadaj616 "but sir i just wanna make sure no one finishes the list by making it longer!"

@Jaegerrants 11 ай бұрын

Damnit... okay okay we'll put the Solar Molotov coctails in storage. But can we at least test one in pluto? I kinda want to see if one of those could warm it up to t-shirt weather.

@ecki74 11 ай бұрын

"It's never a warcrime the first time."

@mattbrown5511 11 ай бұрын

Or if you are the victor. Just like history, it is written by the conqueror, not the conquered.

@joshfuller5076 11 ай бұрын

Ah, also a person of Electrician culture I see.

@Magavynhigara 11 ай бұрын

Theres never a first time if you cant count

@alexandermcgovern1471 10 ай бұрын

Ahhh the Geneva suggestions

@TheMariusDarkwolf 10 ай бұрын

It's not a warcrime if there's no evidence. These are the baddest men on the planet with a budget big enough to fight god. I'm not saying it's right, I'm saying they'll get away with it.

@furycarnategaming 11 ай бұрын

The term revised Geneva convention gave me the chills.. because it tells me they have invented more atrocities to add to a already utterly terrifying list of destruction.

@overlordmagnatron 11 ай бұрын

I have to wonder why they named it with "Revised" as we have been adding on to it since it's inception in 1864, most recently in 2003. The chilling part here is the fact that we revised it and still left the aliens out of it, sort of sends a clear message ya know.

@kerry......... 11 ай бұрын

Canada went to war again?

@furycarnategaming 11 ай бұрын

@@overlordmagnatron they are likely not a part of it because they have not chose to be signatories of it at that point.

@Gaster601 11 ай бұрын

Anti-gravity bombs that invert the pull of a planet, slinging everything not bolted down into space. nanites that cause a grey-goo scenario. Atmospheric ignition which glasses a planet. genetic scrambling, destroying current and future life. de-sapiencing, turning sapient species back into savage beasts. singularity-catapults or as I like to call them, long distance hole punchers. dimensional folding, breaking space itself. atomic disassemblers, breaking matter on the sub-atomic scale. neutronium bombs (the stuff a neutron stars core is made out of), imagine all the atom bombs on planet earth exploding simultaneously, every second, for 15+ minutes. building a hyperspace bypass. all-you-can-eat shrimp for 5$

@nachtwaya8721 11 ай бұрын

That the other Stellar Gvts recognize the importance of co-signing it with humans is very telling.

@norsehawk 11 ай бұрын

Please do not taunt the Dynamite monkeys...

@ironwolfF1 11 ай бұрын

And, under _no_ circumstances give them an excuse to unleash the Trunk Monkeys.

@Zael_Moonblade 11 ай бұрын

But remember, at our core, humanity is nothing more than Rock Throwing Murder Monkeys.

@involuntaryanalysis 10 ай бұрын

Apes. We're apes. No tail. I know, I know, alliteration, but look me in the eye and tell me "Murder Ape" doesn't roll nicely off the tongue.

@cube9244 10 ай бұрын

*Sade Monkey Noises*

@joshuabower219 10 ай бұрын

And never. EVER. Give them a reason to use gorilla warfare.

@dmaxcustom 11 ай бұрын

An overly happy human enters the room dancing in pure joy. "EUREKA! We weaponized warp speed!!!" All the aliens in the room falling into despair. "Why hooman, why..."

@ADK3333 11 ай бұрын

“Cause we CAN!”

@draconisaganata 11 ай бұрын

@@ADK3333 nah. "because we where bored and wanted to see if we could."

@thepbg8453 11 ай бұрын

Human:”Because if we didn’t, someone else would’ve done it first.” Alien: “No they would not!” Human: “what?! You believe our well founded paranoia is founded on unsound principles?”

@SamaelHellscrem 11 ай бұрын

And the human answerd "BECAUSE WE FUCKING CAN!"

@xavierzaxavier5873 11 ай бұрын

actually it just accident some boring engineer accidentally create it while try to warm the food via warp space...🤣

@timothypryor7952 11 ай бұрын

As the professor finished his speech to the classroom one stood up. But his movements were strange. He didn't move the same as the other students. He reached up and pulled off his head revealing a human under the mask. The human looked around the room before saying to the professor, "What, no mention of how good our intel gathering operations are?"

@_Lunaria 11 ай бұрын

i was so sure that the one student that was coughing in the back, hidden by shadow, would be a human. Either a student or a spy like you suggested.

@christianking4002 11 ай бұрын

Lol 😂

@Netherdan 11 ай бұрын

"Hey doc, just a heads up. I can't speak for every human but if you follow this list it might avoid certain war:" "Don't attack civilians, don't hurt children of any species, don't hurt cute species (by human standards), don't take slaves, don't hurt human pets (especially if it's a pack bonded apex predator), and never, under any circumstances, put pineapple on pizza"

@gyny2358 11 ай бұрын

@@Netherdan More like "Make sure to let the human decide wether there is pineapple on pizza. The ones that want it on pizza are about as zealous about it as the ones that don't."

@Netherdan 10 ай бұрын

@@gyny2358 oh, it's not about the pineapple pizza controversy itself or the Pineapple Pizza War of 2048. It's just an orientation for xenos trying to understand the controversy themselves. You see, it's not advisable to eat a fruit that tries to eat you back if you're not human. But if a human request it, be sure to let a human prepare the pizza and don't let other species touch it or eat it PS: the context here is that pineapple has an enzyme that "digests" our flesh at the same rate we digest meat. That's why your mouth may hurt a little if you eat too much of it in one go, and the reason Pineapple is an excellent meat tenderizer. Bromelain should be on the same level of Capsaicin for the intergalactic community

@drthmik 11 ай бұрын

Something I've actually heard about various culture groups, from Northern Europeans, to Middle Easterners, to North Americans, to Africans "They are the nicest, friendliest, kindest people you'll ever meet... Until they're not."

@Nempo13 11 ай бұрын

Something to remember, the country that has committed the most war crimes and cause most of the geneva conventions...is actually CANADA. With assistance from American weaponry...but yeah. Canadians are the most likely to commit war crimes. lol

@trinalgalaxy5943 11 ай бұрын

Speak softly and carry a Big Fucking Stick. An enemy might become a deep friend with nothing but words, but those words must be backed with Strength and Conviction if they are to mean anything.

@Shadow-dy7oh 11 ай бұрын

Canadians, especially for the geneva convention rewrite of ww1, the Canadians were not nice

@IRMentat 10 ай бұрын

From individuals to families to tribes to communities to villages to towns to regions to cities to countries to whatever comes next (if anything). At every step of that path it’s greatest threat and competition has been each other competing for the same often limited resources. That’s before any religion, outlook, politic or ideology is taken into account. So yes, play nice, you never know what the downside is until it’s either too late or you become the example to be set.

@nightwolfnordberg9476 10 ай бұрын

A exempel is sweden we have been in peace for over 200 years know but before that we was in many wars all over the places and the last war we had was against russian and if i remember corectly norway and another country and we fought it four a couple of years before our king die and we was force back

@juliankirby9880 11 ай бұрын

The implication, is that all these empires have always been like “hey, war is normal, no need to get too brutal” and then Humans showed up. And one of those empires learned a hard lesson.

@ravenouself4181 8 ай бұрын

And the rest were like: So... we all agree not to provoke the Humans in any way, shape or form? Right?

@BobThePenguin. 7 ай бұрын

"We don't have any official rules for interspecies war- Why are you smiling? What's a Geneva? Why are you laughing!?!"

@noahjones9833 2 ай бұрын

Or that the worst thing ever done by their entire species was a single genocide, while most of our nations do it time and time again

@illuminati5664 11 ай бұрын

"The Revised Geneva convention dictates how to conduct war between humans, it's very well thought out treaty that limits the use of much of humanity's weaponry. The only problem is that we, as you might have guessed, are not humans." That sentence gives humanity that much of a Black Air Force Energy that it's my favorite one from the entire story.

@otakucon 10 ай бұрын

Nah bro, we got black Tim's. We want the extra weight when we kick

@bryanwoods3373 10 ай бұрын

Imagine as an alien race getting a message that just reads, "In accordance with the Revised Geneva Convention, you are formally notified that the First Restriction has been released."

@illuminati5664 10 ай бұрын

@@bryanwoods3373 cold

@Thalanox 10 ай бұрын

@@bryanwoods3373Hellsing?

@WalkerForestShortFilm-st2iz 10 ай бұрын

Similar. I just made it up, but it could be similar to Alucard's seals. @@Thalanox

@Iluvantir 11 ай бұрын

Ah, the Geneva Convention. So wonderful... unless you're NOT human. Then it's terrifying. It is possibly even a "check list".

@mattbrown5511 11 ай бұрын

With an ever-changing list of shit not to do.

@Samagryn 11 ай бұрын

Fuck around and find out, and we'll turn it to a bingo sheet real quick.

@Dwarg91 11 ай бұрын

@@mattbrown5511with a lot of it added because of what the Canadians have done.

@Iluvantir 4 ай бұрын

@@Dwarg91 It's never a war-crime the FIRST time :P

@Dwarg91 4 ай бұрын

@@Iluvantir Too true!

@Sarindanvelor 11 ай бұрын

Clearly the instructor is very well versed in the understanding that you never want to be the one responsible for your people finding out

@flyboy6392 11 ай бұрын

I believe that the ratio of fuck around to find out, charted on a graph, starts at about a 1:2 ratio, possibly a 1:1 ratio until you reach a fuck around factor somewhere between 5 and 6, 4 if it's a stricter curve, where you find out at an exponential rate, until a firm plateau of find out at a factor of 10, at which you can't find out any more to a fuck around factor of I'd say about 8 if I'm being generous.

@Namelesswhirl 11 ай бұрын

Ganeva convention: "This list is incomplete. You can help be expanding it."

@ArgonianSkaleel 7 ай бұрын

on the recruitment flyer for the research labs? "Congratulations, you created another thing that really shouldn't be allowed to use."

@vladyvhv9579 29 күн бұрын

The enemy are aliens? Cool... (tosses copy of the GC into the shredder).

@jaminsoncampbell7507 10 ай бұрын

Alien "don't attack a human at all cost" Human "but i have been a bad little species"

@AnikaJarlsdottr 5 ай бұрын

"would you intercept me?" *licks lips* "'I'D intercept me"

@-zawzaw-8897 3 ай бұрын

@@AnikaJarlsdottr I love this reference

@rheinbewachen1211 11 ай бұрын

“ooh boy it’s time to rip open the space time continuum” *one broken law of the universe later* “Finally time to turn it on!” Aliens: Please don’t, your species nearly wiped out a whole mini galaxy last time you tried some- *Big red button press* A wild dinosaur has appeared.

@OddlyIncredible 11 ай бұрын

"The last time we gave humans some technology, they used it to make a star into a toroid. We still don't know _how_ they even _did_ that."

@SamsTopBarBees 11 ай бұрын

I laughed at "a drone from wish" DAMNIT!! Wish is till a thing hundreds of years from now?!

@notayetti555 5 ай бұрын

Dude, what is scarier is the fact that wish is popular enough to be used by a completely different species in a completely different solar system millions of light years away from Earth. HOW THE HELL DID WISH BECOME A MULTI-STELLAR COMPANY?

@LiPolygon 4 ай бұрын

@@notayetti555 This is the Darkest possible timeline

@Nyrufa 11 ай бұрын

I feel like if you wanna teach aliens not to mess with us, you show them records of all the horrible atrocities we've committed against our own species, and then ask them what they think we will do to a threat from a totally different species.

@CowCommando 11 ай бұрын

If THIS is what I did to my brother, what do you think I'm going to do to you?

@spudgamer6049 11 ай бұрын

Or show them the evidence that suggests homo saipan might have.. out competed.. a handful of cousin species before we were using tools much more complex than natural rock shards.

@Luke32336 11 ай бұрын

Look at what we do to animals in factory farms. They aren't even a threat to us. Aliens would get bodied.

@OddlyIncredible 11 ай бұрын

@@Luke32336 _"Aliens would get bodied."_ This is actually one of the theories on why Earth hasn't been formally contacted by any extrasolar sapience: we're too dangerous as a species to risk talking to.

@VelociraptorsOfSkyrim 10 ай бұрын

Just give them the geologic record of the last 10ish thousand years. If an animal was deemed a threat, it was hunted to extinction. That only stopped when we realized it was a bad idea to eliminate entire species.

@ravenouself4181 11 ай бұрын

Meanwhile, the Human scientists: Oh, come on! Where's the fun in that? We promise not to destroy more than 10 solar systems.

@Sorain1 10 ай бұрын

*Intentionally. Not to _intentionally_ destroy more than 10 solar systems. Human weapons development has this history of finding out the weapon was just _slightly_ stronger than predicted.

@theengagedfew 8 ай бұрын

@@Sorain1 The Trinity test comes to mind. I don't think we need that at the galactic level.

@ravenouself4181 8 ай бұрын

@@Sorain1 Fair point. ust looking at the Tsar Bomba it's enough to prove it, they nerfed it by 50% and it was still far more powerful than what was expected.

@jaanzi4347 10 ай бұрын

"As additional supplemental learning materal on why you shall never attack humans we will be playing an Earth game called 'Halo' today."

@vladyvhv9579 29 күн бұрын

"Followed by the classic Earth movies: "The Thing" (both the 2011 prequel and the 1982 version), "Aliens", "Critters 1-4", "Predator 1 and 2", and "Independence Day."

@Wastelandman7000 11 ай бұрын

He's not wrong you know. We don't have a shadow. We have an abyss. And we are Abbadon.

@merlinathrawes746 11 ай бұрын

I think it might be wise of the aliens to request copies of that revised Geneva Convention document and ask the humans to negotiate to be included as signatories to it.

@ianharrison5758 2 ай бұрын

I think that given how the other species are portrayed that they never really needed to have an equivalent document and thus grew into their council or whatever without ever needing one. Then us humans show up, and I guarantee you the second we mentioned the Geneva convention it was basically word for word made into their councils equivalent. Galactic politics probably don’t make it feasible for it to require every species to agree and sign on, rather it’s more likely we’d just demand they enforce their own equivalent and as long as that is maintained we wouldn’t go full oonga boonga on them

@vampf5700 11 ай бұрын

Goddamn insignificant mining drone from wish. 😂 I do not think this Shop will last so long.

@Maddog3060 11 ай бұрын

"The seething abyss lurks in our hearts, and constantly tempts us to give in. To be a human is to stand as a bulwark against your own nature, to deny its honeyed words and repent of your darkest desires. For your sake, and for our very souls, do not provoke us into letting go of our self-imposed discipline. You wouldn't like us when we're angry." -Ambassador Banner, to the dignitaries of the Falkonig Conference [which ended the Coalition-Union War].

@OddlyIncredible 11 ай бұрын

On a more scary note because _this one is real:_ "I come in peace. I didn’t bring artillery. But I’m pleading with you, with tears in my eyes: If you fuck with me, I’ll kill you all." - James Mattis, former US Secretary of Defense, speaking to Iraqi leaders.

@ocanaldocaos7408 10 ай бұрын

I like the implication that wish still exists and it’s a galactic company that managed to survive the market for that long

@jukkiivi4282 11 ай бұрын

What a delightful story of human supremacy in warfare. Thanks for finding and narrating this!

@Sanquinity 11 ай бұрын

Less human supremacy and more "Humanity is a Pandora's box. We don't know how it could be opened, but it's best to not find out as we also don't know what terrible things it could unleash." The human military supremacy was more of a throw away line in this one.

@scottclark3761 11 ай бұрын

Humans....yeah. The last thing you want to do is give us a reason to unite against you. It doesn't end well.

@AnikaJarlsdottr 5 ай бұрын

"would you intercept me?" licks lips "'I'D intercept me"

@Mr-__-Sy 10 ай бұрын

This reminds me of a D&D post somewhere on the internet in which a light paladin that wasn't human and the Bbeg of the campain who was a human artificier in said paladin party had to fight in an unexpected third party intervention over their plans and the artificier ended up turning a non letal mundane object, I think it was a dust bunny, into a weapon of mass destruction, and the paladin simply said, and I quote: "If you want something turned into a weapon, give it to a human."

@xessq1 11 ай бұрын

one more time for the back of the room.."Do NOT F' around with Humans and find out!"

@anathardayaldar 11 ай бұрын

Evil Xeno Council Chamber: A: We did it! We stole one of the human's top secret documents! B: Excellent. Have you translated it yet? A: The first words are comming to my coms now. Hold on... the title says... "GENEVA BINGO CARDS"

@bahdas_jahfada6286 10 ай бұрын

I love the idea that humans are so terrifying when united against an enemy that they are terrified of themselves

@RogerWKnight 7 ай бұрын

Zoo Hypothesis. The reason we don't see any aliens is that they quarantined Earth and our solar system off as soon as they detected agriculture. The starship captain who allowed us to hear the Wow Signal got in a lot of trouble. Oumuamua is a piece of wreckage of his starship.

@corustar2184 11 ай бұрын

"Please, you must allow our species to sign the Geneva Convention" "No" The other species of the galaxy lay down arms and Pax Sol Invictus declared.

@carlfromtheoc1788 11 ай бұрын

Do not kill or harm human civilians. Definitely do not kill or harm human children. And for gods' sakes, do not (and I cannot stress this enough), do not kill or injure their larger furred pets known as dogs. There is an ancient holo-series of movies about how one person reacted when his dog was killed. We have found it to be only a slight exaggeration of Humans' actual reaction to what I have previously mentioned. As civilized as humans are, they have an uncanny ability to become extremely violent in the blink of an eye and sometimes can only be stopped by killing them, and even then they may still do some damage.

@kleinjahr 11 ай бұрын

Most especially don"t mess with their doggos or cars . For if you do, then something wicked will this way come.

@battlesheep2552 11 ай бұрын

"If there is a non sapient creature they seem oddly attached to, DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES BRING HARM TO IT, or else they will likely, as the humans say, 'go all John Wick on your ass'"

@philycia1220 11 ай бұрын

Be wary humans stockpile unused ordnances for the day they are needed, and while the stockpile sits newer more advancements are made. So again be wary humans always have something new waiting to be battle tested. 💞

@gregkun1 11 ай бұрын

Grand Admiral of Earth Space Merine High Command leaning over to the human intergalactic diplomat whispering in his ear: "Revised Convention? Don't you mean Revised Suggestions?" Earth Embassitor: " Heh a translation error. Which will be fixed eventually."

@patrickpercefull8278 8 ай бұрын

I once dined with a family of Humans during a holiday they call, Thanksgiving. I survived the experience...with scars.

@leechowning2712 11 ай бұрын

We are so lucky you keep doing these... and especially now that we can see your face. Because you are a better storyteller than half of what Disney or MGM/Fox calls actors. Be safe, and thank you.

@jenniferzoch3309 7 ай бұрын

I second this. I'm so glad you do this! Thank you!

@IRuinEvrything 10 ай бұрын

reminds me of the old tumblr meme where a Vulcan explains to a Klingon why Humans are allowed to run the federation even though one-to-one a vulcan is physically and mentally superior in every way. I can't read it aloud without bursting into laugh tears.

@armycowboy4313 11 ай бұрын

Human intel officer's listening to the lectures: damn another alien race going to play nice at all costs. Human Generals: yeah seems like the pickings for a good fight are getting slim lately. The Marines are getting board and we are running out of scenarios for them to train for. Human scientists: have you already done the medieval scenarios. Human Generals: yeah they had way too much fun with that one. Marines using broadswords, axes and spears just butchered the targets. Pretty sure they made the scariest goriest horror movies look like kid shows. Human politics: so do we need to step in and start a war. Human Generals. 🤔

@Dwarg91 11 ай бұрын

You do NOT want board marines as they just might be the scariest thing in the universe.

@kaneconqueror6560 10 ай бұрын

I now really want the HFY reality to cross with warhammer 40k. Orcs and Marines would get along perfectly, and likely we'd end up leading a WAAAGH!

@danieljensen794 11 ай бұрын

This guy has such great manners. He keeps saying please.

@justinlay5662 11 ай бұрын

I am not gonna lie a "Revised Geneva conventions" scares me silly

@OddlyIncredible 11 ай бұрын

Oh it gets worse: it's already happened at least once IRL.

@patriograysmark6328 11 ай бұрын

to put it lightly, jeepers. to be rather verbose; an educator drilling a lesson into students is one thing, to do so with such emphasis, I can only quickly scrawl notes on my datapad and barely find the time to acknowledge affirmative to confirm my listening and understanding. akin to replying almost automatically to being addressed with 'yes chef!'

@thefbisurveillanceteam2132 9 ай бұрын

Against Non-Humans the Geneva Convention, is in fact, a checklist.

@strongriver7955 5 ай бұрын

This is not funny. 🤭 It should not be funny. 😆 But it is! 😂

@Jade_Kaligawa 5 ай бұрын

I love the power and delivery of your content. I often read these stories myself on reddit, but hearing a new voice with various degrees and character defining aspects makes them even more enjoyable.

@brianjuergensmeyer8809 11 ай бұрын

Gosh darn, it's good to see you back in the game again!

@brianjuergensmeyer8809 11 ай бұрын

Also, don't know if you've moved yet or not, but a suggestion - I assume it's as easy in the UK as here in the States, but before you buy a place, go in and have it tested for black mold. Given the age of some of the construction you talked about, I'd be thoroughly unsurprised to find that you have or had a black mold problem contributing to your problems in your original house.

@matthewjaniss4103 11 ай бұрын

Another masterpiece my good sir. Glad to have you back in action.

@yomogami4561 11 ай бұрын

and sadly we're currently using that line to skip rope thanks for the story and narration sir

@JDNCLOWD 10 ай бұрын

the geneva convention in these stories turns into a check list

@kingwoof3444 11 ай бұрын

That feeling when the instructor references sun tzu….

@Alexitt50 7 ай бұрын

I just found this channel and Wow, just wow... It's like finding an unlimited supply of Asimovs Analog on audio... Well done and thanks for all your hard work!!!

@chaplaingilgamesh2964 10 ай бұрын

The thing that made me laugh is that Wish still exists hundreds of years into the future.

@jplanks1470 11 ай бұрын

Man that crescendo at the end had me leaning back in my chair!! Well done!

@darnelljohnson5313 11 ай бұрын

I was Listening to this at work, and i was biting my lip trying not to laugh out loud only to have tears in my eyes

@destaniebarnes 10 ай бұрын

I never quite considered what the geneva convention would look like to outsiders.

@willgallatin2802 11 ай бұрын

Damn. Will I ever get to test this new gravity grenade launcher I was issued?

@OddlyIncredible 11 ай бұрын

Cue sad face of engineer holding a portable point-and-shoot black hole gun he invented but doesn't have any way to test...

@strongriver7955 5 ай бұрын

... actually, if he sent the thing beyond our galaxy and set it off, it might just create a black whole that becomes the center of a new galaxy.

@greanstreak04 11 ай бұрын

Wow! You put some emotion into this reading. I love your work and use your playlists for the occasional bout of insomnia. Keep plugging along, I expect you to hit 100k subs soon...

@xRa01 11 ай бұрын

Can we please please please Drag more of The nature of predators into this channels!!!

@leonturtle9521 9 ай бұрын

Ah yes humans giving aliens PTSD once again

@majorplothole2620 6 ай бұрын

Love your reading of this story, and I love hearing these types of stories for numerous reasons. One of the biggest consensus's or common threads I see is that we humans are from a "Deathworld" (Which I absolutely love) and whether or not we're one of the only non-apex creatures or one of the only non-herbivore creatures in the galaxy who've developed FTL, the common thread is while an outlier, Humans are not to be underestimated under any circumstance. There are some holes in some of these stories, all of Earth uniting for instance always seems like an impossibility to me, at least in the long term. But I still love them, and just listening to them inspires me to write more of my own. Thank you for your contribution in narrating, I really appreciate it. :)

@haskellyoung3121 11 ай бұрын

The drone from wish had me rolling. Lol

@13gan 10 ай бұрын

In the far future, Wish still exist and have expanded to other planets and species. Apparently, the reputation of their product's quality also remain unscathed. I think that is the true horror in the story, that even aliens fall for Wish.

@PanduPoluan 11 ай бұрын

Don't give a reason for humans to convert the "(revised) Geneva convention" into "the Geneva suggestion", or worse, "the Geneva checklist".

@MrOwwl 11 ай бұрын

Well shit, now I'm afraid of my own damn shadow!😳

@OddlyIncredible 11 ай бұрын

Do not fear the presence of your shadow; fear the depth of its darkness...

@subtotalaljar3620 10 ай бұрын

He looks like a brotherhood of nod command and conquer character

@RealArcalian 11 ай бұрын

Greetings, Mentlegent! For the Rhyhtm that is Algo Humans DO have a concept of limited warfare. That concept is, limit the enemy lifespans as quickly as possible, so that peace can be achieved as quickly as possible.

@OddlyIncredible 11 ай бұрын

See also, "peace through superior firepower," or going back a couple thousand years, "si vis pacem, para bellum" ("if you want peace, prepare for war").

@Vrooto 11 ай бұрын

And if you see a insignia of a maple leaf with a white background and one red stripe on both sides it would be best to run straight into a star as they have countlessly been the ones to revise the Geneva convention.

@DeadGamesSociety 11 ай бұрын

A FOOKIN LEAF!!!! 😁

@Drago_Whooves 11 ай бұрын

Sounds like they need to contact the humans themselves and sign the Geneva convention and promptly adopt it's values

@maelglorious 11 ай бұрын

But it's never a war crime the first time...

@jeanannd 11 ай бұрын

LOL, humans legends proceed us in space.

@deus0rcinus889 11 ай бұрын

For the Voice! For the Author! For the Algorithm as well I suppose 😂 😂

@OddlyIncredible 11 ай бұрын

Upvotes for the upvote god?

@beingsneaky 11 ай бұрын

I see this author understands humans true nature better, than those who write mamby pamby stories about peacefully humans. Peacefully humans have what a laugh. What we would have a vegan t rex?? I think I would find a vegan t Rex more believable then quote unquote peaceful humans.

@mattbrown5511 11 ай бұрын

Peaceful is far from harmless. I can attest to this being fact. Multiple combat tours have taught me to be many things, harmless is not one of them. I want a peaceful life: woe unto any that disrupts that peace.

@RhollidayGames 11 ай бұрын

Look, just because your planetary government crossed the fuzzy wuzzy line of crime doesn't mean humans are incapable of maintaining peaceful relations with anyone else.

@Melanesian-dude 7 ай бұрын

It's funny to think the lecturer thinks it's "UNTESTED"

@HonestAlthalus 11 ай бұрын

Best story reader on youtube by far, bro. Been cooler now that you do the webcam and little bit of costume, adds more personality to it, and I like that you seem to read it organically, do a bit of editing for the original authors when they phrase something awkwardly. The extra tone and emoting you do puts you way ahead of so many other channels that just use some text to speech synthesizer. Bonus points, you've led me to so many good stories, I binge your stuff whenever I run out of things to read and catch up on. 😁👍

@yourdeadboii3728 8 ай бұрын

I didn't know that agro put his face in the video while narating. Bro so majestic

@MidnightSmoke 11 ай бұрын

Here is your like and comment as payment for the story and to help your channel grow and get you the recognition you deserve.

@westerncowhand7814 8 ай бұрын

AgroSquirrel I feel that you are my spirit animal. Not sure how you should take that, but there it is.😂

@squirrellordsgaming2772 11 ай бұрын

Thank you for the work that you do. These short stories brighten my day.😊

@MrDhalli6500 7 ай бұрын

I prefer the "Unseen voice" and images provided at the key points. Having to look at you look at me just seems so Mystery Science Theater 3000

@johnc5011 10 ай бұрын

Thank you.... Thank you.. Welcome back. You were missed. FOR THE ALGORITHM!

@Shadow.Dragon 11 ай бұрын

Great story; Excellent Narration!

@christianking4002 11 ай бұрын

These type of stories give me chills and I love it 😁

@zephyrstrife4668 10 ай бұрын

Someone: *accidentally blows up a small terran mining ship* Humanity: Geneva Convention? More like Geneva Suggestion! Word to the wise: Humans in general are waiting for someone to stumble so far over that line that they get to say "You dun' goofed"

@AnikaJarlsdottr 5 ай бұрын

"would you intercept me?" licks lips "'I'D intercept me"

@zlboyle90 11 ай бұрын

What version of the checklist are they on now?

@exiledeternity7852 5 ай бұрын

thank you for linking the original text!

@SLEPhoto 11 ай бұрын

The All-Gorilla approves

@jeffhall4228 7 ай бұрын

Had to listen to this one again. Bravo. Twice😊

@CaptainShield 11 ай бұрын

He's absolutely not wrong

@GR3YD3ATH 11 ай бұрын

line is pretty easy. never harm any ones children theirs or others and never harm one of their friends... oh and breaking any law they setup to avoid future atrocities would be a good idea too.

@JohnStormForge 7 ай бұрын

The line is actually pretty simple to understand. In the words of Agent J "Don't start nothin (squish)......won't be nothin (squish)........oh I'm sorry was that your auntie?"

@michaelernst3731 11 ай бұрын

Protect your voice bro , be safe.

@enriquemendoza8650 10 ай бұрын

Great narration.

@Archer957 9 ай бұрын

I love these narrations! Perfect to listen to while I'm at work thank you!

@SirWhiteRabbit-gr5so 8 ай бұрын

That the Hoomans have Laws, Treaties and Conventions limiting weapons means they have those weapons, and more that haven't been added to the list ...yet.

@digger1900 Ай бұрын

Another great story

@marxel4444 9 ай бұрын

IMAGINE! "WE ARE ORDERED TO CLASS THE PLANET!" "THERE IS A HUMAN CHILD!" "HOLD! EVERYONE ABORT!" then...everyone watches in horror and they could not stop the order in time. "The end comes soon we hear drums in the deep.they are coming"