Wonderful video sweetheart. I think it will be a great help to other through hikers who are experiencing or will experience similar problems, adjusting back to normal life. I was so happy I was there for you, so we could get through it together 😘

Dear, dear Mary, oh how you continue to endear yourself to us, your avid followers. What you shared with us today was so special and honest, and as someone else has already said, real! For me it was like I could feel your emotions, and doubts, and fears as you described the things you went through post trail. No one expects you to be perfect, but rather, we want you to feel free to be you. That's what draws us to you. I believe I said it a long time ago in a post but I say it again, you are a treasure! Thanks for sharing this and I look forward to the vlog and your next hiking adventure.

This sounds quite a bit like how it is coming home from a deployment! Experienced much of the same, and while it does get better with time, setting goals, exercising and generally keeping busy really is key I believe. Happy to hear you seem to be out on the other side again, always looking forward to your videos :)

Its amazing that the things you experienced when getting home are exactly in line with the things I experienced when getting home from Iraq. Things like being numb , not being able to make decisions etc as well as the things you did setting goals, having plans for exciting things in the future , simplifying your life , changing the way you react to thing , are the same things I was finally able to do and it got me out of all that negative stuff. Down to the letter I had the same experiences . Keep up the videos. I've been taking my time watching them , saving them for when i need a little pick up.

I’m not suffering from depression but I’ve been pushing off an anxiety attack (or having a constant anxiety attack pushing off a full blown panic attack idk 😬) for the last 36 hours 😬 . Very overwhelming and just too much to deal with and going on. It’s only been about 48 hours and I was only hiking for 2 months but wow I’m feeling something 😬😬😬 and here I am searching videos to see what’s wrong with me 😬😬

Thank you for your very sweet honest comments about your struggles when returning. I have purposely become somewhat of a recluse and also find that going out in public somewhat stressful. We don't realize how much we are bombarded by technology, other people's energy, fear mongering etc. Thanks for reminding people to create their own clear, clean space in their homes, heads, cars, work, relationships etc. Silence and alone time is critical now!

Some of what you said reminds me of when I got out of the US Navy especially in war time. There are bad things and good things that happen. You go home and want to share your experience and no one can truly understand what you are saying and they pretend to know and compliment but there is that lack of connection. You try to live a normal life but there is no such thing as a normal life anymore. People around you are so dependent on the environment that is created for them and you look at that environment as unnecessary, wasteful and inefficient. Thank you for your thoughts and diligence to look at your feelings and place them as you see them and not just generalize what someone else said.

haha.. tinkerbell tackles bears!! good to hear you're feeling your old self & enjoy the trails..

I had a very similar experience, I also finished at the Bridge of Gods and sat near the public toilets and felt the relief to be done with the trail. Thank you for sharing!

Very sage advice, glad you’re settled back into everyday life. Seems you have realised the serenity prayer ‘God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference’. Have a great time back on trail with Derek

I have never done anything outdoors for the duration you spent or to endure what you had to experience. I enjoyed every footstep of your trek....hubby and I did several multi-day seakayak excursions, I’ve rafted the Grand Canyon twice, and have walked a week on the Cornish Coast path with a group . My first out door wilderness experience was the summer of 90 ...spur of the moment raft trip on the Colorado....hiked into the canyon and got on raft at Phantom Ranch....beautiful 9 mile hike down fun day of rafting...started raining in the middle of the night...no tents! I thought I was going to die of hypothermia, and I was wet. I had never ventured outside my comfort zone....at camp we had no camp chairs.....they did feed us really well....the whole day everyday was all about getting on and off the raft unload all that stuff to make camp...cook clean dishes fix your sleeping bag, sleep under the stars, what I realized that I was truly living in the present moment for the first time! The rocks and the river in the bottom of the Grand Canyon did not care that I was uncomfortable...I got in the groove and cried like a baby when those guides left us at the hotel where our cars had sat for a week. I am 67 years old and I will never forget the moment when we got on the bus to take us to our cars it had a bathroom and I’ll never forget looking at myself in the mirror in the bathroom...I had never gone for that amount of time without looking at my self in the mirror...I almost didn’t recognize me! I was changed....From that point on no more going to the beach for a week and being slug like....and coming home heavier...we have been goers and doers...I’m blabbing too much...you were suffering a loss...after the trail...a loss usually is accompanied by grief....you loved the hike...a lot. The amount of grief you were feeling was probly equal in measure to the amount of love you have for the trail and being out in nature . We are stuck at home right now....but we have started every three days to go ride 50 miles from our house up towards the mountains of northeast Georgia and western NC. Just seeing those sights are saving my sanity. Better than drugs...almost as good as wine! This self distancing is outside of my comfort zone....gotta start paying attention to the being in the present moment thing! Good luck!

You may not be perfect, but you are the perfect positive person to help others who are down. You have a special way of looking at life and will the medicine we all need. Thanks for sharing. lrg

YES! This is exactly how I felt when I returned from my dream trip. Thank you so much for helping to put words to the feelings I had. I'm much like you, very positive and I was really surprised by how I felt! I really appreciate your openness- Lael

Hi Mary. I have just finished watching your entire PCT series. I have watched a few PCT series of other thru-hikers as well but wow, your final episode was the best I’ve seen. Not afraid to admit I had a lump in my throat and watery eyes watching that, having shared all of what you had been through in the preceding weeks and months. Your story was truly inspiring, knowing about what you shared of your lead-up to taking on this challenge and also your pure determination and grit to push on and complete the trail, despite how many hurdles you faced along the way. You are one tough cookie! What an amazing experience to have had and such a life-changing adventure! Thanks for sharing the reality and an honest account of post-trail life in this video. So interesting to see how you’ve integrated back into “normal” life in the months following your thru-hike. Hiking is my passion as well and I was inspired to start up my own KZfaq channel last year when I hiked The Overland Track in Australia which I’m sure you’ve probably heard of. I’m starting to work my way up to longer hikes of a couple to several weeks and it’s my dream to thru-hike one of the truly long trails in the coming years as well. Hope your writing is coming along well. Put me down for a copy of your book. I would love to read it. Happy Hiking! Chris

Mary, when I knew that you had finished, I wrote a note to you about PTD. Along the lines of "watch out for PTD"...lol... This vlog was the absolute best. It is difficult, as a man, to sit through and find so many places in the video where I want to comment to try to help...but this forced me to listen to what you had to say without trying to encourage or help fix things! You did a wonderful job going through and beating PTD. I am so happy that you and Derrick were able to spend some time post trail, too. Your book will be spectacular!

Lovely, heart felt video which is so easy to understand because you have always “kept it real.”

Dearest Mary, ( Used as a term of kinship ) this is one of those moments when I wish I could speak directly to you. Y ? Becuz there's just to much inside that's wanting to come out and b shared with you. But let me say part, ,,, 40ish years later and I STILL have go arounds connected to the trail !!!! Weekenders no longer fill the need but I cannot go. Life has gotten in the way. But I'm hoping planning n striving for that which is calling. I had no idea how things would be after. Or how just a stroll across a wee bit country can do what it's done. It's like a virus with only one antidote.... More !!!! Marriage, children (2) A home, aging parents ( gone now, no more pain praise God ....death I found, is really mercy in disguise ) so yeah life just is there. But I wrk on a way to get BACK out there. It may only be 800 or so miles ( we'll c ) but I'll be out there. I hope it'll be what I need it to be 😃... How does it get such a hold ???? I see a lot of people struggle to keep their KZfaq channel going after their trip only because it makes them feel still connected... But little by little it fades away ( Channel ) I often wonder about them. My heart is with them. As it is with you. I born a outdoors guy. My parents and grandparents took us out as much as they could. It's a place where everything seems to go into slow motion and allows me to see more clearly the smaller things and my connection to them. I try to make that happen here but it's not quite the same. It is not a Wonder to me why some people spend their whole life preparing for the next trip saving up and getting ready to go out again 😁😃🤗 That is how they cope. sometimes I think I was born in the wrong generation and should have been in the 1800's😂. Anyway Mary I appreciate you and your channel and your openness in your sharing !!!!! Congratulations on making the paper not sure if that's good or bad but congrats anyway !!!!!!!! I hope it will open the door for you to get your book Out there 😃😃. And the run that you are going to do will it be with your mom ???? Go team mom !!!!!!!!! Where's the tee shirt 😂 lol You asked about ideas for the channel,,, I don't know if it's a good one or not but, maybe you could lay out on a map the trips and highlight them. and explain to us the difference between how things work there as opposed to hear. Such as here in national forest or BLM you can pull over and camp wherever...... Does it work that way in the UK?? Do you have a national Forest?? Or BLM ?? What are camping restrictions like there for you ??? Those kinda things ... Take care friend 😃 And keep on rocking the free world ☺️

Great vlog Mary....very helpful Im sure....you are an inspiration !! Ive commented to many hikers on a long thru hike...."the best and worst step is the last one" all at the same time... only thru hikers will understand that....take care Mary...you are a breath of fresh air !!!

Very brave video. Well done Mary. Well Noted....Thank you ! You have grown considerably this day 👏👏 Best wishes to you 👋

Thank you for your honesty. You are feeling how many soldiers feel after being deployed for many months to years. There you are just trying to survive. It is also why I love hiking. I find it’s better take short hikes or trips to let your mind find it self.

You have experienced something so extraordinary, amazing, wonderful, almost surreal 🌄🌞🌛⭐and coming back to the so called reality is not easy. I think people have to force themselves to adjust to the somewhat ordinary life and to convince themselves that this life is important or suffer from the "mountain addiction", at least some 😥do... It sounds a little harsh but it is true. I am very glad you are working on your book (can't wait to read it) and planning some backpacking trips. Your PCT experience made me stronger 💪and more fearless😊, so thank you for that 🤗And very nice meeting your lovely mother in the previous video🙋‍♀️. Glad they wrote about your in the newspaper, you absolutely deserve it, you are a true role model.

Thanks for sharing your insights about the trail and updating us on your future plans.

This is the first video about post trail depression that feels very honest and gives a sense of what to expect and how to cope with it. Since I would love to do a long distance hike soon, it helps a lot to know that when it happens there is nothing wrong with you and you are not weird or crazy or the only one experiencing it. Thank you so much! And thank you for your other wonderful videos too. There is so much information on your channel but also so much fun stuff and of course your amazing PCT videos! PS: Have you ever considered hiking on the TGO Challenge? :) The camaraderie there is amazing!

Thank you, Mary, for this honest observation and discussion of post-trail life. What a perfect setting with the early spring background and the lovely birds singing. 🐦🍀🌳💐.

Thanks Mary. Good advice for everyone.

Well done video on a subject that needs addressing. Thank you for sharing! I thought I was the only one that went to the market early in the morning. About 12 years ago I finally realized that my reaction to things that happened to me determined my quality of life. I was 100% responsible for how I responded and consequently for my happiness. I also accepted the premise that positive energy in the universe attracts positive energy. Likewise for negative energy and thoughts. It seems simple and easy though in fact it does take determination to recognize, apply and change ones habitual responses. Many of these can be ingrained during developmental years as a child and difficult to change. I do see that positive energy in you and I am excited to see what adventures are in store for you! Best!

Hi Mary, great to see you again. Glad you’re getting past those crazy post trail feelings. Look forward to seeing you guys on your upcoming adventures! Be safe.

I appreciate your thorough and insightful descriptions. I am struggling with using the Guthook app as a navigation tool. I would love to have a "how to" video for Guthook from you! Thank you! We hiked the Coast to Coast trail last year and it was such a highlight! I know that parts of that trail are commingled with the Cleveland Way. I am so excited to see that hike. Can't wait!

So good to hear how you are dealing with things. It’s a form of self-care. ♥️

Thanks, Mary, for being so open to us and sharing your inner thoughts and experiences! 💞 I can imagine how you felt and how strange everything to you was. When I returned home from my 3-month-world trip, which ended with 10 days sailing in French Polynesia where I slept every night on the deck below the stars, it was so strange having a ceiling and 4 walls sourounding me again. It took me some time to get used to my old life again. How strange must everything be for you after 7 months!

Did the Cleveland Way last summer, and wasn't expecting much but i was completely suprised how much i enjoyed it, im sure you will have a great time.

Ha, Mary, you talked the frost right off the grass. Always enjoy hearing your thoughts and you're so articulate. Glad you're through the adjustment period now. I remember the overwhelming sensory overload after long mountain trips. I'll have to look up your hiker to writer site... good name but even more memorable might be "she who tackles bears."

Congratulation, now you have the entire world want to know you more about your PCT IN US and more friends all over the world. Always love your videos.

Interesting hearing your thoughts Mary and do publish that book!!! Your a tough lass don't underestimate the powers to easy to slip back into the creature comforts.....big smiles mate your a hiking hero and credit is due to you for sure. Cheers

Yay, for sharing your thoughts and tips. Always look forward to your videos. Too, look forward to videos about your country. I am so sorry about you adjustment after you arrived home. But, so blessed by your joyful smile. Still miss those 'good morning ' though. Can't wait to see the next video. Super blessings

Looking great, Mary. Glad to hear you're doing well and got over that bump. I'm looking forward to getting and reading your book. Don't care if it takes a year or 10 years I'll be patiently waiting. I sure do miss those "Good Morning" at the start of your PCT videos.

Post-trail depression is not something I knew about but makes perfect sense. On the trail you feel like you are working hard, accomplishing something everyday. You feel proud of yourself for the hard work you've put in. Also, all of the endorphins from constant exercise. Then, suddenly, that's gone

Post Trail Depression is certainly normal and I'm sorry you had to experience it. Thank goodness you had a wonderful support system. I have not done a thru-hike, bit I have spent a week or more in the backcountry many times over the years. When I would return to life among the citizens it would feel surreal and I would feel apart from everyday life. I am sure months-long treks amplify these feelings. For most of my hiking years, I was lucky to live on small farms with animals to tend to, so that was a help. I just retired last Spring and hope to return to the trail for brief stints this summer. It will be interesting to see how I feel now as I come home to an apartment that is on a greenway with trails through the hills a short walk away. Thanks for your open and honest sharing of your experience.

This was such a thoughtful and honest video and shows that even someone with the most positive mindset and bubbly personality can be affected by mental health issues after such a feat like hiking the PCT. Thank you for addressing this and also how you dealt with it. I am excited to check out your new blog and excited for your upcoming hikes/adventure with Derek!! Reporters are an interesting species ;) they definitely create their own reality at times in articles as I found out on a couple of occasions. Keep smiling :))))

I would love to hear your thoughts of your confidence boosting before and during your PCT hike. About your fears eg: hiking alone, sleeping in a tent alone, not being able to do the miles, etc and how you overcame those fears.

We've been at an Airbnb during social distancing . When we get home we might get PTD. Biking hiking trails and being out doors is therapeutic. 💜🧡💛❤💙💚

Good morning Mary and Derick! Just a quick God’s speed to you and your precious family during this difficult time in our world right now. Praying for you both and your family today right along with the many others. Stay safe. ~ Fred 😊👍🏼

Wow! I really enjoyed the detail you went into about post trail depression! I'm sure it varies a bit from person to person, but it's still good to have an idea what to look for and how you helped yourself. Also, really good to hear about lasting changes to you from your hike (the car accident part).

So good that you can share your experience Mary; this will help so many. Looking forward to following your Hiker to Writer website. x

I definitely want to see vlogs on those three trail hikes. Wild camping isn't always illegal in England and Wales. You can do it in Dartmoor, and in other areas with owner permission. Still, a lot of people do it, especially in common land areas. You can camp on your John Muir trip, as it's legal in Scotland and there's a right to roam. Crossing my fingers that I can still do my UK trip this summer. I've got most of the gear I need to do some hill walking and camping.

So funny about you “tackling bears” very cool about the newspaper stories though. Thanks so much for sharing Mary!

Wow Mary! So enjoyed, as so many did I’m sure, sitting with you and hearing your honest introspection of the very real feelings all of us feel. I do have a very dear friend who is a CEO coach and just put his first book to print. He loves to help others. I will be in touch with his info! Thank you for the wonderful opportunity of getting to share your very special experiences! Please, hello to Derek~ Fred😊 🏆🥇

One of your best videos, thank you for sharing your inner thoughts with us. Hopefully looking forward to trail magic again this year but the virus has caused a lot of uncertainties this season. Looking forward to new videos and big. Trail Angel Madd Baker.

This is a great honest look at the sadness we feel after a major accomplishment. To help find your connection maybe consider trail running instead of road running. I think the trail community may give you the sense of connection that you are looking for.

Hey Mary, looking forward to seeing what kind of book you publish. I've written 3 books and have ghost written 6 others for people. I used LuluPress.com, and you can use their editors, etc. Amazon has a means to publish as well if you want to look into that. I chose Lulu because I wanted control the ability to sell through other retailers. Best of luck!

Looking forward to the book!

Excellent video. Glad you are feeling better and wowser! You are in the news! You were fortunate that you were able to do it. PCTA is advising against it and it hit the news papers today in Seattle. I hope people heed the warning so each section of trail stays open in each state, forest and park for people who just need to get out and walk for a day or two. Pretty sure private land will close it's doors anyway.

Glad your in your happy place.

💖

The feelings you are describing Dixie (from Homemade Wanderlust) also described. If I remember correctly her post hike depression started about a few days before she reached the end. Because she knew a few more days and it is over.

Thankfully you live in the UK. There are over 1700 long distance paths that you can explore and get yourself back on trail. The Long Distance Walkers Association is the only know organisation that has listed every one of the known long distance trails in the UK. The following link will give you an idea as to where to look. I'm hoping to get out and walk the High Dales Way and Stanza Stones Trail this year. Both are listed on the website! The LDWA also enables you to record your achievements on the national trails once you have walked 5 or more. You can wild camp in Scotland and it is tolerated above the intake walls in England & Wales as long as you are discrete and pitch late and strike early. I wild camped the Cleveland Way to the coast and then used campsites as I walked south with the sea on my left. My favourite trail to date in the UK. www.ldwa.org.uk/ldp/members/search_by_path.php

I want to see all that footage that you are holding back from us of you fighting off all the BEARS and WOLVES. Especially, the encounters that you had with the wolves. You never mentioned that on you hike. I do remember some discussion about some prints in the snow on whether they were coyote (the popular consensus) or wolf or mountain lion/bobcat. I can only image what some gullible Brits think about the US and our wilderness now. I find this amusing (not laughing at you but the ridiculousness of the whole thing). This will help to sell your book and I'm sure someone with knowledge and the ability to get you a contract will contact you sometime in the near future. Good Luck, Mary.

Funny, when you mentioned the John Muir Trail, I said to myself, "She's already done that in the Sierras." It's good and brave of you to address the post-trail depression issue. Other thru-hikers have done so, as well, so this is clearly a real thing. I admire all of your honesty and your desire to help other hikers. Interestingly, the experience is somewhat akin to descriptions I have heard from people returning from tours of duty in the military. Make of that what you will, but I have no doubt that re-entry into post-trail life can be very gnarly. Glad you are moving forward with gusto!

A lovely video Tink! I believe having a plan for after returning is a key. Having a daily goal (miles, towns, landmarks) to having no set goals is quite an adjustment. Carry your hike with you back to the "real" world. Your morning walks! Try scented candles that recall your hike, the olfactory is a path to those memories when writing. Also, I just knew that was Derek in the background, up to his old stalker ways!

looking forward to following you Will be in UK for a short while next fall ( hopefully if this virus ends up allowing us all to travel again ) to do two trails, one in Scotland, and looking for another to do, then will fly to Spain to do the Camino Frances. Just all depends on what happens in the world. So, looking forward to seeing what you see and do on your hikes, and really enjoy the concept of the European B and B and hostel experience, so will enjoy watching that as well.

I've had post-trail-video depression since you reached the Bridge of the Gods. Suggestion for your book: Vegan meals you would have sent yourself if you had had the option of sending yourself packages along the trail with an emphasis on maximizing taste and nutrition. Perhaps even meals you would have made and dehydrated yourself.

Great video as always Mary. I experienced some of what you talked about after finishing the Camino two years ago. It is strange. Have you ever heard of Abby Barnes? She's a young lady hiker, a Brit and you might enjoy her videos. I'd love to see you two together discussing hiking, that would be interesting! God bless you and thanks!

Yes

THE SERENITY PRAYER

Stay safe. You’d might be better off on trail with the current situation... 🤣 thank you for the PCT videos you’d be a good person to be with during a zombie 🧟‍♀️🧟‍♂️ apocalypse💪 🍻

Thanks for sharing. I’m suffering from pre trail depression... with my PCT2020 thru hike possibly being cancelled

Mary, I have published books with both commercial publishers (OSU Press) and I've self published. I'd strongly suggest going the self publishing route. Unless you are Steven King (or equivalent) the commercial publishers will take control of your book and you will have very little say over how it turns out. You will have to do all of the editing, layout and promoting yourself but in the end you'll at least be able to "do it your way". Good luck. I want an early copy and I hereby volunteer to be a proof reader (seriously)!

I wish to experience the same.

What you portrayed to us while you were on trail was a great emotional effort in all aspects. It would be natural to experience some type of depression when you got home and back to "normal" living. Your story had many similarities to what a old WW 2 vet told me was his experience of "surviving" during the war and his return to the states and trying to acclimate to life again. Say it ain't so; the name Mary Mansfield is synonymous with fake news and in Britain of all places? Mary, you are COMPLICATING our lives if we have to follow what you are you doing in more than one place.🙂

Oh mate big hug. I've only ever done small walks of say 60-100 odd miles over several day's but I hear where your coming from. I plan, go, film, ache and after a while want to finish and just get home. Back home life seems so crowded and fast. Seems everyone has a handle on what and when I should or shouldn't say or do anything. Peace is hard to find. My response to this madhouse was to meditate, thank all my experiences and you guessed it, plan a walk 🥴. It's crazy but as you say a natural thing. I often wonder, if I lived in a small village or way out in the sticks, would it be different? Who knows? When I visit these little places I fall in love with the atmosphere and so wish to stay. However when I speak with the locals, usually this pertains to young, they hate the place and long to escape and live like i. What a paradox! Don't get me wrong I have all I could ever want where I am. But there's that certain something and I just can't describe it. Heavens know what I'd be like if I did a long hike🙄. Oh well😊. You look after yourself. Love the videos. You be good you be safe and you keep smiling. ATB Dave 😊👍 aka wackyswanderings

Great update as usual. I am now suffering from Pre-Trail Depression. How did I get it? I just had to postpone my AT thru-hike by 60 days and it may end up being completely cancelled because of this virus going around the world. Stay safe and I hope you get to hike some more but if not, you will be able to get the book more complete. John from MI

PCTA is requesting all thru-hikers postpone their trip due to hygiene concerns on the trail, especially hand cleanliness ... 😳😰

Absolutely in Nepal at the moment. Because of CV hasn't ended up in the way I wished. But beautiful but boring New Zealand will be a let down. A South African Olympic gold athlete, penny haynes swimmer wrote a book on this very subject, and her battle.

Have you done South Downs Way? I have done a few little sections when I visit my friend in Pulborough. The Downs are lovely!!!! I have been planning my PCT hike since August and followed your journey. Hope I get to do it -starting in Chester NOBO and then will flip and go SOBO in mid June......

Hi Mary, great video. Hey, as a British Citizen how did you get a 7 month stay in the States? Did you have to extend? Don’t you get the standard six months as citizens from other countries? Just curious about that ... and I was just thinking ... since you got all those feelings after the trail ... I was wondering if you had done a lot of backpacking before the PCT, and how did you learn about it. Thank you !

Sounds like sensory overload. Otherwise known as re-entry shock.

Scotland has beautiful long distance trails where you’ll be able to wild camp. See the website walkhighlands.com. I would really recommend the Cape Wrath Trail!

😊💖🐶🐶

My you clean up well! So very beautiful, inside and out.

Maybe when you were compassionate to the man who his your car, you were being gentle with yourself.💜💜💜🤟

Mary, you may not be perfect, but you are indeed Super Woman. You broke ribs, then nearly died on trail, yet you finished the hike. So don't under-estimate yourself. One more thing: you will never have worn out your welcome in the USA.

Can you do vegan cooking recipes?

Right now COVID-19 is controlling our lives. I've had to cancel my camping trip at the end of April and I'm beginning to think My 6 week trip this summer is going to get canceled also. Its not a pleasant time right now. Getting up and hoping there is food at store is reality where I live now. There isn't any toilet paper in any stores. This is depressing. Worrying about my parents is wearing me out. They are quite a bit older.

Hi Mary! I dont always comment, but definitely spent a fair amount of time bingeing your PCT hike! I am so glad you've tackled what sounds like anxiety coming off the trail. Your smile is infectious & I cant wait to see what is next for you! ABOUT YOUR BOOK - my friend via facebook can help! Here is a link to her profile: facebook.com/Parul.A.Agrawal

Anna Grafl has hiked the TA & the PCT. Wrote a book about her TA journey. Perhaps she could advise you? She's on KZfaq (Tale from the Trail). - www.amazon.com/dp/1981035982/ref=cm_sw_em_r_mt_dp_U_1kzCEbQGNNA9M

Comments first thing in the morning no way coffee must have coffee I don’t get out of bed until I’ve had my coffee

You should be a therapist😁

💖