Just letting you know, “not perfect, but better” works when weeding the garden too!

At 55 I was diagnosed as ADHD. That being said…. I did not know how to deal with clutter. People would say “ how would you eat and Elephant”? One bite at a time…Seriously? I had no idea! I wouldn’t know where to start, trunk, foot ,tail etc. So listening to your concepts has worked miracles in my brain. I always thought I was just dumb or lazy. No I just needed a recipe for success. So thank you. I just learned about you through a girlfriend 6 weeks ago. I have decluttered 4 rooms so far. It’s such a great cleans of what I call noise in my head. “Clutter noise is a thing in ADHD brains. Thank you so much for your help 😘

My mother recently passed away at the age of 96. You can imagine all the treasures she had. I was in charge of letting each grandchild and great grandchildren choose something to remember Grammie by. It warmed my heart as an angel or a prayer book was chosen. One granddaughter just wanted one of the tea cups that Grammie always used. Nothing was worth any money. The one thing that really touched me was my nephew asked for the pickled eggs jar, this is an old glass jar, no one remembered what was in it originally or when/ where it came from but every holiday it would hold two dozen of mom‘s purple pickled eggs.

Those of us who acquired a depression/rationing mentality from our parents (1930-50s, use it up, wear it out, never throw it away) are the ones who try to pawn stuff off on our children. I can say with a pretty high level of certainty, your kids are already struggling with the cornucopia of consumerism-they. do. not. want. your stuff, too. Take a photo and donate it, just let it go! Odds are someone will pick it up, but if it ends up trashed, it's not your problem anymore.

I couldn't help but chuckle. 'My kids are heartless, and I'm so proud.'

Speaking about sentimental things, YEARS ago my mom gave me the dish set (bowls, cups, platter….) that her and my dad got on their first anniversary. I have never used much of the set because I had my own set. I started decluttering a couple of years ago and now we are getting into stored away stuff which that set is in. I was finally at a point where I did not want them taking up space in our home but thought I would hurt mom’s feelings if I just gave them away so I started asking family members and no one wanted them. I ask mom if she wanted them back in case someone decided later they wanted them and she ask what they said now and when I told her they all said no she said “then just get rid of them! They do not want them and I have no use for them!” I could not get rid of them fast enough!

Yes! I forget who coined the phrase but, "Don't let what you CANT do stop you from doing what you CAN!"

I do laundry 3 days a week: Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday. I run 1-2 loads at a time, and I like it because it's not too much to keep up with. I'm more likely to look at 1-2 loads and fold them; by the time it's 4-6 loads, it's a project and feels overwhelming. Saturday i do more towels, sheets, etc. I started the habit back when my kids were small and those were bath nights and the days my husband worked later. Work shirts also meant that more often wash days meant we didn't have to worry about not having a clean shirt. I appreciate Dana for recognizing everyone's "unique" situation. We just need habits that work and keep things under control.

Maybe Montgomery Ward’s sold the music boxes to tourist shops in Switzerland 😂

I just found you in the wee small hours. As someone who suffers chronic pain, and is currently fighting a secondary infection from covid, the... "if you can't do anything else, do your dishes" is the absolute best tidy advice I've ever heard.

It took me so long to get it into my head that I needed to declutter BEFORE I organized my stuff. I always tried to do them together and never got very far. It took moving to another state - and having to declutter before I packed the stuff I was going to keep - that I realized your method actually made sense. While packing, I thought in terms of which room would I use this item, and placed it into the appropriate labeled boxes. When putting away stuff in the new house, I used ‘where would I look for this first’. Thank you for your book and KZfaq channel.

Last year I wanted to give my 4 grown children boxes of "precious memories" from their childhood. They are all late 20's and early 30's. They didn't want them. They are all Millennials and tend to live minimally. LOL I could have saved myself so much work from collecting, to storing and moving, with each move. Lesson learned. My kids are "heartless" too. 😂 Great video, Dana! Jackson, you just took photobombing to a new level! 😂

When I have to change a “where I’d look for an item first” place I put a sticky note there telling me where it is until it becomes my new “where would I look for it first” place.

Isn't it funny that the whole family starts to change. I started decluttering, however my husband was not interested. One day he was looking for a certain something and he was looking at the first place he thought it should be. He asked me "Why is this 'other thing' here, it belongs out in the shed." so he took it there right then. Yeah!!! I'm trying to get rid of stuff my mom had kept from my Grandmother. It sure feels bad letting it all go, but nobody it my family wants it. Thanks for all your encouragement. Love your "Just do the dishes" it sure changed my routines.

I started watching you recently but have never commented. Had to laugh when you texted your children about the music box. I have also texted my daughter about certain items and the answer is NO. Recently she texted me if I wanted something and my immediate response was YES. But after thinking about it I knew that I didn’t need it and sent her a text don’t need to add to my stuff so add that to your donation box. Love watching your videos Dana. You show what real life is and the struggles we go through in the decluttering process. Thank you for keeping it real.

The distinction between decluttering and organizing is HUGE. Even as a fairly organized person who enjoys big projects and multitasking when I start getting overwhelmed it’s always because I’ve tried to mix the too! Your concept of just making things better and not destroying a room is so helpful for my perfectionist self but as a mom of young kids when emptying a room and expecting to fix it is a bad idea.

I just cleaned my homeschool area in my kitchen. I set my timer for an hour and made sure I put things away, not putting them in piles for later like I used to. What a difference! I was avoiding that area, but of course I could still see it everyday, taunting me. I got about half done, and I’m so happy! That definitely helps with momentum for the next half. Thanks so much for your humour and helpful tips!

Also have to say, I often ask my daughter if she wants what I am getting rid of. The answer has always been “no thank you”. She’s trying to manage in a small house with her husband, a13 year old, an 11 year old, a dog and two cats! They both work from home since lockdown- her husband had to build himself an office in the garden!! 😊

I thought your book looked familar, and then I realized that I already owned it. So I looked for it. And there it was, right on the shelf where I keep my housekeeping books. Yes, I have a shelf for housekeeping books. I think I better reread it.😉

As a minimalist in the hot South, we do laundry almost every day. :)

While living several states away from my mom, I had the biggest sentimental goof and it gave my mom a chuckle. I had found a piece of paper with her writing on it (yes, she was still with us at the time)and I stuck it in a "keep" pile. Quite sometime later I took it out and realized it was a grocery list! Truthfully, I do have a hard time getting rid of things that I have that were my parents! That topped it off, though!

Dana, to supplement your two questions, when I find something I've been looking for, I now ask myself: Where DID I look for this first? Then I consider whether that will become its new home.

June and July were months of HUGE decluttering success because of your advice. I organized a few spaces as I decluttered because they were easy to do, but I was able to skip all of the decluttering paralysis by giving myself permission (and focus) to just declutter. I made so much progressssssss!!!! Yeeeessss! Love you and your channel. Keep the videos coming. There are a couple of spaces where the container concept is about to put a hard check on my reality (now that the closets are decluttered). Sometimes hard is still helpful. It is a little scary 😨, but you and the folks who share in your comment section give me hope and courage to take the next step.

I was recently going through a box and asked my children if they wanted me to keep it for them for when we are gone. My answers were, kid 1 no, kid 2 what?why?, And kid 3 Id rather have the pictures of you in it/using it etc.

LOL I started watching you for the decluttering advice. Now I watch you mostly for the humor😄 Thank you!

Thank you Dana. I have been in my studio and got completely paralysed with indecision. I was literally sitting holding my head in my hands and feeling desperately stuck. Your advice showed me exactly what had happened. I had started on the right path but got distracted by trying to organise rather than decluttering and getting the crap out of the room. Now feeling motivated again with the focus on Trash, Donate and Where does it live now clear in my brain.

Yeah, I needed to hear this. I’ve been letting organizational ideas and theories get in the way of decluttering, and then I end up without organization and with clutter. Now, let’s see if it’ll actually help me declutter more. And eventually maybe organize. :)

Usually I say no when my mom asks if I want something, but now and then, she will ask and be surprised that I *do* want something! It is totally worth asking just in case. Thanks, Dana, as always for the great advise and real talk along with humor. Thank you, Reid, for the credits with one final chuckle in each video!

Take Your House Back changed my home and our family culture. I can now do organizing projects because the stuff is all together where I would look for it first.

My music box came from Santa Claus! Was top on my list ❤️. I still love it

thats like a christmas stocking i have, Mom told me grandma had sewn it, it has elaborate sequins sewn on it. and many years later my older sis told me our next door neighbor made them for church sale. so i guess my mom wanted me to think it was special?. her mom died 4 months before i was born from cancer. but i still have the stocking because its beautiful and i love it!

Dana, you are such an amazing person - I could listen to and be inspired by you all day. I have been listening to your 2 books on Audible over and over - basically every time I’m decluttering and cleaning my home - fantastic guidance and so brilliantly narrated. I now want you to be the narrator of all books - I’ve never come across a more engaging narrator as you. Thank you!!! ⭐️♥️⭐️

The only thing I wish my Mom had saved more of is photographs. When my parents passed I kept my Moms bowls and rolling pin, recipes. She was an amazing baker. I kept a basket my Dad made. That’s it. I should ask my son what he would want to keep after I am gone. That changes with the seasons of our life.

I've been decluttering in stages and I am now working on items that I inherited from family members who passed away...I've called my sisters to see if they would want certain items and I preface the conversation with "I have X and I'm not likely to use it. I'm giving you first refusal...". If the item is refused (which is most of the time), then I donate it.

I was overwhelmed thinking about my kitchen. I have more stuff than what will fit in my kitchen. So I kind of went backwards then what you recommend. I sat down made a drawing of all the cupboards in my kitchen and how I want them to function, such as what stuff do I need easy access to every day. And that one in one cupboard. Then I started on the next cupboard where I wanted to put my glasses and mugs and found that I had more than what would comfortably fit. So I put my favorites in the cupboard and that left when I looked at him and said well I don’t really like these, I don’t use it every day, so why am I hanging onto them? So they went in the donate box so I am decluttering and organizing at the same time but I realize a lot of people can’t do that. This is just the way it is working for me

Just a quick comment that your link to take your house back isn’t working. I deleted the “www.” and it worked then! Thank you for this video!! I have questioned myself on this a lot. There’s been several things I’ve rediscovered while decluttering and using your two questions, I say “yes, I knew I had this so if I needed it, it absolutely would occur to me I already had it, but I don’t know where I would look first because I thought I had looked everywhere for it. Except, apparently, for inside this one corner of the closet.” Listening to you answer this question helped me realize I’ve been basing where I’d look for it on the multitude of places where I’d already looked, instead of the gut reaction on what my first instinct would be.

Loved this Q & A! Reid, I notice something was off about your brother’s photo when it first was on the screen. After reading your closing remarks I enlarged it on my screen and had too laugh! Thanks for the chuckles at the end of each of your Mom’s incredibly helpful videos!

The “Take Your House Back” program is worth every single dollar…& the value my family & I have received from it…well…how much is peace of mind, feelings of ease, & a calm contentment worth? It’s kind of crazy, but I feel like I had been holding my breath for some time & can now slowly exhale. (And you guys, it had nothing to do with the dust levels here! Lol!) As I don’t use Facebook, I wondered if that would make the program feel lacking in some way….Nope! I had no “Fear Of Missing Out” at any time. It was a complete program regardless of my lack of Facebook abilities. I also follow Cassie & Dawn as well (& have for some time) which made me wonder if I’d see, hear, or learn anything new…Oh yeah! The combination of all 3 working together, bouncing ideas off each other, tackling real issues “right in front of me” was a completely different experience! There are too many “best parts” to single out…A definite worthy spend!

Thank you for that term “decluttering paralysis”! I really enjoy watching you as well!💜

Thanks for direct call out of people that give you something not as a free gift, but to use you as a storage units! So annoying

Light bulb moment! I've always tried to organize & declutter together. You made it so clear why that does not work. And the two questions are priceless!

Best decluttering books ever! And videos. 🥰 ty!

Question #1 is also helpful during a pick up. I will now ask my hubby, “if you needed this, where would you look for it?, instead of trying to find a good spot for it myself. He hasn’t quite bought in to the second question. 🤣 He always says he would remember he had it, but I know that not to be true based on experience. I don’t get rid of his stuff, though. I have plenty of my own stuff to declutter.

I have found that my adult kids want things I'd toss without a problem, reject items that well, sort of break my heart! Now grandkids, different story, oddly. Will want what their parents don't! More tied to items I treasure! Strange....

Thank you - decluttering isnot the same thing as organizing!!!!

My home is getting better. Thank you for sharing your perspective and repeating your steps. I'm not good at it, but 5 donatable donate bags left my home yesterday.

I get so much benefit from every one of your videos, podcasts, blog posts, and (read and reread) books, Dana. But I have to say that I have a hard time not skipping to the end of each video to see Reid's credits first!

Dana thank you so much! My husband answering where would i look for this first now in our 60’s thats where it goes. Game chsnger!!

So many gems in this video! I really like your way of thinking, so many things are "clicking" for me. Really thankful I found you, thanks Dana!

My family regularly declutters and will send pictures to each other just to check if anyone wants it before it goes to the donation place - typically it is a 'no' and we all understand that answer is perfectly acceptable!

Ever since reading your book, Decluttering at the Speed of Life, your two questions have taken up residence in my head! I ask my self them all the time. Also the container concept idea. What an eye opener those approaches are to the whole decluttering scheme! Thank you, Thank you for writing your books!

Yes Dana, it's your humor that helps imspire us. Helping us to realize it's all doable and seeing th humor in this sometimes tedious and mundane task is very helpful. You're just terrific at keeping it real and achievable. 👍🙂👍🥴

I think it has taken me so long to declutter because of my love of organizing. Which led me to spend more on organizing. Come to find i don't need organizing "stuff" when i have less stuff.

My sister and I both received that very same music box on Christmas day in the 1960s. They were slightly different. Mine plays The Lonely Goatherd' from The Sound of Music. I still have it. We lived in Orange Co, CA, and my mom purchased it locally. :)

So funny, and so true, texting children and getting a “No”. Being detailed orientated and not wanting to miss out on the fun, 9.28 is where all the fun stuff is, love the muscles!

I love your great advice! Thinking of making a tape to use when I sleep like thesupposed brain washing tapes from the cold war. Lol!

Had to go back and check out the part where you text your kids as I hadn’t noticed the photoshopped photo!🤣🤣

I used to wash whenever I noticed I was running out of clean clothes. Which meant that I could never predict when I would need to do laundry. A few years ago I decided to do laundry on a specific day of the week--in my case, Wednesday, for good and sufficient reasons. I had begun working from home and no longer needed a "work" wardrobe, so I was able to pare down the amount of clothes I owned. I now keep enough day-to-date clothes (including underclothing) to last the week, plus a couple of extras in case of unplanned events (like getting soaked in a thunderstorm). I live a very casual lifestyle, so I have a minimal amount of "dressy" clothing for wearing to weddings, funerals and other more formal occasions, which are (thankfully) rare. I love the fact that this has also simplified my life by eliminating the necessity of debating what to wear every morning; I grab a pair of jeans and a t-shirt and I'm good to go.

It seems to me all the 30 somethings & younger do not want our "treasures." They say take a picture of it, & probably really don't want that. Maybe they realize it's just things. I'm just too sentimental, but I'm much better than I used to be.

Not done just yet but I have made so much progress, even the hubby is asking himself where is the first place I would look for it.

Yes! I have been on my own decluttering journey, in part through your youtube posts. I have a couple of items that belonged to my mom that I was ready to let go of, but I messaged my neice and my remaining sister with photos of them. Turns out my sister does want them! So, good idea to check first.

When we downsized, I put together a space bag and box of items for each of our 2 children that were either handmade for them (afghans, quilts, sweaters, etc.) or that they had made as children, along with their baby books. I have a feeling that they never opened the space bags and just glanced in the boxes. But they enjoyed going through the baby books. Other than that, I don't offer them anything because they don't have the room for it.

I live in an apt that has a w/d in the 2nd bathroom. I am so happy that I do not have to go to a laundromat. I can sort and do laundry in my own home! I do laundry 2x a week. My clothes and husbands clothes, 2 loads, 2 days a week, towels and washcloths mixed in. I add extra loads as needed - bedclothes; knitted and/or crocheted afghans, hats, scarves, gloves; other. It works for my family. We don't have kids.

Love the muscles on Jackson. Great job, Reid. I sometimes ask my kids but usually it’s just easier to donate.

I had the 'super sentimental' myth just recently; dresser I thought was my mom's from her childhood turned out to be a cast off from her friend in the 70's. I was keeping it as it was from Mom, now I'm keeping it because it was from Donna, who's passed. And it's a really good, old & solid set of drawers.

Oh my goodness...thank you for thinking about your kids having to deal with your stuff. Also we have parents and in laws that constantly want to pass down stuff...and it is hard to say no... But we are learning.

I live doing a load a day. The clothes we wear are usually two days a week. Other days are different kinds of laundry.

Most of us have a section of piled up random stuff in the garage--- thank you for saying this!!!

I've done the decluttering to the place where my daughter says I've gone too far. I love the time I've saved NOT doing housework. I'm at the beach on vacation. I know I'm going to walk in my home, look around ...and want to burn the whole place to the ground. I suppose it'll light a fire under me to paint...

Those first five-six minutes here are pure gold! 😍 Thank you ❤️

Such a good video! My mom saved a ton of stuff from my childhood because she had a full basement. There was so much stuff to declutter before my parents moved out of their house they were in for 20 years! I am being very selective in what I save for my kids.

I so agree! I'm following your books and getting decluttered, but I don't want to have to even think of organizing.

Great info. Declutter first then organize. TFS

I love your facial expressions! Where would I look first for something.. is a game changer. It's actually been working for me...well mostly lol

Dana! I hope your day is going well, sister! I bought both of your books; I have a Nook. I made the hard decision to purchase an e-reader to cut down on buying physical books--although I absolutely LOVE physical books! I decluttered my books a few days ago, and kept only what fits in my bookcases / cubes. The books look so much better. I appreciate you, Dana. Thank you for sharing such great information.

Have you considered using a temporary organizer such as a paper bag or bags cut off at 1 or 2 inches so that you (or someone) could get some items into a location they are hoping to organize with something that is not yet there? I use shoe boxes or especially lids for this. When the organizer comes in, the paper organizers could go into recycling. Then the cascade of issues would not happen... Love your ideas!

I’m so glad I found you! You are spot on about getting bogged down & not being able to just get started. I’ve been doing little bits every day & feel so much better!

I found your channel, then listened to both your books. I had already started decluttering a year ago....but your books were extremely helpful and encouraging. It has been a week and quite a few areas of my house have stayed decluttered and clean! I still have alot of spots to work on but definitely making progress. In my head I think "Is this better?" I even been keeping some of the yard cleaned up (we have alot of kids under 9). Thank you so much.

I also had a music box like yours Dana when I was young, & yes the roof flipped up but I have no clue where it came from. When I am decluttering and think either of my adult kids (or anyone else I know) would want an item, I send a pic and let them know to Speak now or forever hold your peace. It has worked beautifully, and I tell them all the time - ONLY take it if you REALLY want it, otherwise it is outta here. That frees them to take what is truly special or useful to them. Win, win for everyone. With your helpful videos and podcasts I am finally clearing things I have had collecting dust since 1987! The Container concept is awesome. 😊 Loved the video! Please continue with the Q & A’s, maybe add a question or three, more? Loved the texts & Reid’s comments. 👍😁 Thank you! Blessings! ❤️

Thanks for this Q&A, this really helps me understand the first decluttering question better. I can relate that the question sometimes seemed "hard to answer" and now I'm understanding that for me, it came down to wanting to answer truthfully but not being sure what the truth is -- because it's asking me to guess about the actions of a future me. But wherever I *think* I would *probably* look first is good enough! Cool!

Thank you. I have so much anxiety 😫 with decluttering. Now I see it because I was trying to do that alone with organizing. You've given me hope.

Great video as Always!! Reid next time you mention something in the video could you please put the time in the video that we need to go to in order to find it! I usually listen to your Mom's videos while I'm trying to declutter/clean so I'm not usually actually watching. After seeing the end of the video I had to go spend time trying to find it!! 🤣 I can get back to decluttering sooner if you make it easy to find your fun edits!!

My mother was always trying o push stuff on me I didn't want and it was always a battle where she tried to GUILT me into taking the china, the hutch, the PIANO. I can't tell you how glad I am I stuck to my guns! I have enough stuff to keep clearing without adding in items I never even wanted in the first place but took to spare someone's feelings or out of guilt.

I love the course! It is so uplifting and a fun thing to watch and listen to while I declutter. I have a ways to go but it's s getting there... thanks Dana!!!

I love your point I will add that organising can be done later if you have decluttered earlier I used to organise and not declutter much n used to come back to starting point

Decluttering is a process I can't wait for the next video.

I began following your channel about six months ago and just finished the book How to Manage Your Home Without Losing Your Mind. I have struggled with house organization and decluttering for about 15 years and have read many books on the topic, but your book is by far the best book on the subject that I have ever read. The dishes concept has really made a difference. I am now starting the second book Decluttering at the Speed of Life and I know it will be great as well. Many people want to have a more orderly house but just do not know where to start, thanks for providing the steps!

Very useful... By the way I have to say that blue suits you. Thank you for sharing all your decluttering discoveries. I'm on this path too and your guidance is helping me to get better at this process of letting go. 💜🐶🐱

Oh dear! I do laundry (at least 2 loads) EVERY DAY! Family of 6 🤪 lots of girls

What if the first place you would look for something is a junk tray that my husband piles EVERYTHING in...that is over flowing? LOL

Love these Q&A style videos about the hour better workdays!

I just love your videos. They make so much sense and are so heloful. I have started decluttering and it makes me feel great to remove stuff that I was holding unto for sentinental reasons. I went through each item and realised that most didn't mean as much to me as I thought. Its an on going basis but I'm getting there. I.just love your sense of humour. You always make me smile.

Your hair is so pretty!

I found some hats/patches/neckerchief from when my ex was in the Navy 30 years ago. And some crystal and ornaments from my second ex. I took photos and text both. The Navy things are in the donate. The crystal and such will be picked up this week. I'm really good at decluttering husbands 😁

I was listening to the moms struggling well podcast this morning and they mentioned you and I’m like hey I love her!!! Reminded me to come check out your weekly video.

Love this channel, decluttering first. Less is best. Thanks.

You are so right!! I've been suffering this for YEARS. Thank you!

You didn't make your kids heartless, you made them less materialistic!

A tray can still be visual clutter for some people!

Commenting for Reid to know his editing is a success.