Real Time with Bill Maher: New Rule - 2041 Commencement Address (HBO)
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8 жыл бұрынSubscribe to the Real Time KZfaq: itsh.bo/10r5A1B
In his editorial New Rule, Bill has some harsh truths for college students and delivers a graduation speech to the Class of 2041.
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@xGoodOldSmurfehx 8 жыл бұрын
LOL "back before Canada built a wall to keep us out" my thoughts exactly XDD
@xGoodOldSmurfehx 8 жыл бұрын
***** eh XD
@Nero-was-Right 8 жыл бұрын
+TheChosenSquirrel I'd keep us out too
@ZeldagigafanMatthew 8 жыл бұрын
Just kidnap me before you do, please.
@SirConto 8 жыл бұрын
Mexico will also build a wall to keep American refugees out; that's Trump's plan for making them pay for it.
@SL33VE 8 жыл бұрын
+TheChosenSquirrel You proved your Canadian status by apologizing for your statement. Most US citizens would rather spend days arguing than apologize for anything. Out of curiosity, does it bother you that only we from the States refer to ourselves as "Americans" when there are a billion other people in North, Central, and South America? Personally, I think it's ridiculous, as is almost everything else about "Merkins" (refusal to adopt the metric system, spending more on the military than education and healthcare combined, and knowing virtually nothing about anything outside the US to name a few).
@nomasmedia2053 8 жыл бұрын
This was... Strange, but also terrifyingly surreal
@aurevoiralex 8 жыл бұрын
If you haven't watched Idiocracy, then do yourself a favour and find it now. Chills of horror will spill down your spine, friend!
@EVZYL 8 жыл бұрын
What a tonic this man is. Cheers me up no matter how down I feel.
@Timocracy 8 жыл бұрын
The Zika part... god damn!
@JeanLucPicard85 8 жыл бұрын
Shit, I better start stocking up on plankton.
@VCYT 8 жыл бұрын
Picard maybe back for a new series this yr or next.
@ChristopherJannette 8 жыл бұрын
Do you think food replicators are a good investment?
@ILuvSmexyShowgirls 8 жыл бұрын
That depends, do you mind eating food whose molecules were once a part of garbage, feces, and urine?
@annnee6818 7 жыл бұрын
Saiyan Princess We're doing that today...
@JorgeAguilera 8 жыл бұрын
Hahahaha that Jesus line was solid gold. If I were Him I'd probably do the same lol.
@jackdiseker3467 8 жыл бұрын
I'd probably beam up the 50 or so people who are even remotely still good and peace the fuck out.
@CrashPreinsertion 8 жыл бұрын
Well, it's a bit "on the nose."
@NexusDarkworld338 7 жыл бұрын
Well I'm fucked then. :)
@riceburnerbiker1483 5 жыл бұрын
Why do I see how the religious of the world act,and figure that heaven is a place with very few humans.
@chuckg-ross1378 8 жыл бұрын
You know what's crazy - 2041 is the exact same distance from this year as 1991 is!
@smegstar8527 8 жыл бұрын
fucking right. holy crap
@sirslickrock 8 жыл бұрын
Cray but true
@chuckg-ross1378 8 жыл бұрын
smegstar5000 the third I know right??
@scipioafricanus5871 4 жыл бұрын
Consider. Mind. Blown.
@scipioafricanus5871 4 жыл бұрын
æ
@LOLERXP 3 жыл бұрын
"Epidemic of 2018" Close one, Maher.
@ScootyPuffSr7 2 жыл бұрын
Seriously! Holy shit!
@electricdragon9366 2 жыл бұрын
Off by 2 years, but that's a close & perhaps even a spicy take
@MjolnirsPower 8 жыл бұрын
lmao this was one of the funniest new rules ever
@hebber1961 8 жыл бұрын
Maybe if "ever" started a week ago. Possibly one of the lamest....ever.
@johnburt7935 8 жыл бұрын
"Miami is a city which once existed in southern Florida" is the best-case scenario. A more realistic one is, "Florida is a state which once existed to the south of Georgia". The worst-case scenario? "Florida is a state which once existed to the south of Carolina. No, it's not another name for South Carolina. There used to be two Carolinas."
@christiaanstephan4387 3 жыл бұрын
Florida was a state that once existed south of Kansas.
@wolfstar675 8 жыл бұрын
"Driverless cars still won't pick black people" 😂😂😂
@kyannijland4814 4 жыл бұрын
WOLF STAR 😂
@markironside9818 Жыл бұрын
Thats just so funny
@bobbyknight3589 6 ай бұрын
Good I wouldn't either 😂😂😂
@ARichardP 3 жыл бұрын
5:08 “The Zika epidemic of 2018.”
@packr72 8 жыл бұрын
Chief Justice McConaughey: All Rise, All Rise, All Rise.
@johndanielson3777 5 жыл бұрын
He succeeded the late Chief Justice Bradley Cooper
@susan8282 8 жыл бұрын
rofl that part about Jesus had me dying!😂😆
@krillin6 8 жыл бұрын
true dat
@southsydesasha3125 6 жыл бұрын
Its blasphemy 😔
@redlightmax 8 жыл бұрын
4:09 "Yo, sometimes stuff just be like that and ya gots to deal." - President Kanye West
@l-y-d-s 8 жыл бұрын
This was gold. More like this.
@mathewthomas8715 8 жыл бұрын
I'm watching this high it's hilarious
@SL33VE 8 жыл бұрын
I've seen "How High." Is "This High" a sequel?
@Pawadin 8 жыл бұрын
The sequel has long been created but never released the movie studio chose not to release it.
@AbnormalWrench 8 жыл бұрын
How dare you suggest cyborgs don't identify with a gender!
@VCYT 8 жыл бұрын
....They'll be back.
@saucybackport 8 жыл бұрын
cause i made them
@haiggoh 8 жыл бұрын
no no, I think he wasn't referring to actual cyborgs, but rather cyborggender humans :P
@ShnoogleMan 8 жыл бұрын
Yeah! I have plenty of cyborg friends who identify as male, female, attack helicopter…
@Pravdacz-tp8zu 5 жыл бұрын
I think that cyborg is supposed to be a gender.
@mahirweinnocent1004 3 жыл бұрын
It's late April 2021, and i'm still laughing my a$$ off.
@muffinman5741 8 жыл бұрын
The phrase "But as _______ once tweeted: ...." might actually become a thing in the future
@MrHamtits 5 жыл бұрын
wow
@DeezNuts- 3 жыл бұрын
Oh yes thats true
@aimraah2586 8 жыл бұрын
Probably more accurate than we would like to admit.
@erictheredguy 2 жыл бұрын
Darn if he would've said SARS and 2020 he would've predicted it.
@davidconnolly1130 8 жыл бұрын
These Zika babies were born in 2018 and became members of congress by age 23...
@SL33VE 8 жыл бұрын
The average lifespan is now only 33 due to Keanu's Syndrome and Drumpf's Disease, so they had to lower age requirements for candidates as well as voters. Also, math was abolished in 2031.
@VCYT 8 жыл бұрын
...an that happened under president Palin.
@SL33VE 8 жыл бұрын
+Venky Wank Schools and dictionaries became obsolete after the HipChip became mandatory. Guantanamo is under water. Trump hair is worth 6 billion a strand.
@SetzerII 8 жыл бұрын
Due to hyper-inflation, so is a candy bar.
@drylooped 8 жыл бұрын
@Hopey Changey I wouldn't laugh, look at that shit called core math they are trying to teach in the states. You lose 30 IQ points just by listening to someone explain it.
@adman1381 8 жыл бұрын
Hard to watch but he makes some good points as always.
@picklesandcheese25 8 жыл бұрын
Why is it hard to watch?
@SL33VE 8 жыл бұрын
+picklesandcheese25 Short attention span. Zika baby confirmed.
@saucybackport 8 жыл бұрын
+picklesandcheese25 liberal porn about climate change and sexual identity is giving him a boner
@kristaselene 8 жыл бұрын
So sad. So true.
@florianwicher 6 жыл бұрын
Haha that building at 2:12 is the University of Economy in Vienna, Austria :D
@lauderdalerobite3549 5 жыл бұрын
One of my favorite new rules. I still have a copy of this whole show the day after it aired haha
@qhsperson 8 жыл бұрын
A Canadian comic said that luckily when Canada builds a wall to keep Americans out, it won't have to be very high because Americans are so unfit. More like a speed bump than an actual wall. They were starting now so they'd have it finished by November.
@aleksa2413 8 жыл бұрын
I am writing this from 2041 and can confirm this is true. If we only had elected Bernie back in 2016 things would have been better, now we don't even have elections.
@collinhennessy1521 8 жыл бұрын
I'm writing this from somewhere between Cuba and Florida in 1980, If only we had never had our Cuban socialist revolution, I wouldn't have spent the past 20 years in prison for leading a protest to get our elections back, and have more than 7 pounds of rice per person, per month, and wouldn't be on this sinking boat,praying for God to at least save the children aboard this doomed vessel.
@haris000000 8 жыл бұрын
whos paying for bernies program?
@davidconnolly1130 8 жыл бұрын
I'm writing this from 2017. The world is now under Trumponian rule. All hail lord small hands.
@collinhennessy1521 8 жыл бұрын
David Connolly Did you think of that all on your own? That's a really creative comment. I'm impressed. Gold star for you today!
@lumpy0100 8 жыл бұрын
FEEL THE BERN?!:) Cuban Dictator Batista was uh..Eisenhower's "Bitch;" wasn't he (we can do This all Night)?!?:D Thank You, "Collin Hennessy.":)
@dedominator 8 жыл бұрын
Nope, go back up. Nothing to see here. Trust me, you don't wanna... no don't scroll down...
@gregorlamar9922 8 жыл бұрын
I will, thank you good Samaritan.
@SoloDallasII 8 жыл бұрын
Give this man a Nobel Prize.
@theliberalscholar7796 8 жыл бұрын
Wasn't the background behind Maher the same skyline as in the Divergent Series: Insurgent?
@Lambda_Ovine 7 жыл бұрын
Alright, you convinced me.
@MrRacinger322 8 жыл бұрын
No talking about the superbacteria and the end of antibiotics??? Or was that just too realistic?
@ewanhassall7350 8 жыл бұрын
There's only one thing you got wrong,... There isn't going to be any college by this point.
@adamkatolik1633 3 жыл бұрын
Revisiting this in 2021, we are definitely headed that way
@hellofaname 8 жыл бұрын
Reminds me of Idiocracy!
@thelarry383 8 жыл бұрын
they laughed then...now looks what's happening
@sebastiancardoso 8 жыл бұрын
Reminds you? We're already there!
@computerstar9883 2 жыл бұрын
WHos back in 2022 to hear this
@thelvadam2375 8 жыл бұрын
he so sadistic... we could be best friends
@oninjadaburaca 7 жыл бұрын
I could only remember this video when i heard the election result
@Renji9031 8 жыл бұрын
Chief Justice McConaughey... oh where did we go wrong?
@donfolstar 8 жыл бұрын
How dare you question the mighty McConaughey! He asks better questions than Thomas. Has sex with fewer little boys than Scalia. Legal opinions more coherent than Roberts.
@lizatanzawa7910 8 жыл бұрын
+donfolstar omg, I KNEW there was something about Scalia
@Renji9031 8 жыл бұрын
Liza Tanzawa Yes. There is. It got so bad he had to take a break from life. Forever.
@One_1_11 8 жыл бұрын
Alright, alright, alright.
@alvaroquijano579 8 жыл бұрын
the 80s, people still call it reagan
@kute7763 8 жыл бұрын
"Canada built the Wall the keep us out" and the Jesus joke are gold!
@barisafacan 8 жыл бұрын
Holy fuckn shit! Lmfao
@ernestoabstractjoy 8 жыл бұрын
bill got that canada wall off the simpsons lol.
@VolcanicPenguin 8 жыл бұрын
lol hilarious
@manueldesousa5054 8 жыл бұрын
OMG I can't xDDDD He's too good!
@derektober8736 5 жыл бұрын
I hope that in twenty-two years people watch this and laugh!... or cry.... or ask their parents some meaningful questions about how the world got to where it is....
@vanKrapfen 8 жыл бұрын
2:11 Vienna University of Economics library... so weird that they used that in that montage. I've been there so often!
@pedasn 6 жыл бұрын
the building at 2:11 is the University of Economics in Vienna, also known as WU Wien
@sueobrien7059 2 жыл бұрын
2021 and this seems almost prophetic now.
@JSTONEMUSIK 8 жыл бұрын
Reminds of his old bits from back in the days lol!
@jibjith9278 8 жыл бұрын
We are so fucked, and out of material.
@eyamaharris9195 8 жыл бұрын
I absolutely love his shows.
@OldskolFan 8 жыл бұрын
That was morbid and depressing af. Go back to the future and stop Donald Trump!
@RobDegraves 8 жыл бұрын
Camacho for President 2020!!!
@ATRTAP 8 жыл бұрын
high brow satire, I love it.
@psychedelicfright85 3 жыл бұрын
Zika... at least that wasn't now l blown out of proportion
@lizatanzawa7910 8 жыл бұрын
I think that $2 million studio apartment in San Francisco will be underwater....
@edwardrhoads7283 8 жыл бұрын
Not if it is on the top of one of the hills. Those hills in San Fran are pretty tall.
@CrashPreinsertion 8 жыл бұрын
The underwater apartments start at $4 million.
@frediax10 8 жыл бұрын
haha a lot of people hate him but he tells it like it is
@Other_Robots 8 жыл бұрын
I'm sure by 2041 the gowns will be riddled with advertisements like a NASCAR uniform haha
@wendyfraticelli3481 8 жыл бұрын
Fuken hilarious!!
@fighterdow 8 жыл бұрын
lmfao, I love you man, you always make my day.
@AndreasBelivanakis 6 жыл бұрын
"Yo! Sometimes stuff be like that u gots to deal."
@joseinteriano4417 8 жыл бұрын
I like Bill but this was hard to watch
@AnirudhGargSage 8 жыл бұрын
Why?
@farvision 8 жыл бұрын
because every time republicans/religious people win a battle, we are closer to that situation. Republicans have no clue how the world actually works.
@saucybackport 8 жыл бұрын
+Anirudh Garg cause he gets a boner every time liberal porn like global warming and gender equality is on - can't blame him for that
@AnirudhGargSage 8 жыл бұрын
Criticize every idea so that only the strongest ones survive.
@chillwill120 8 жыл бұрын
Because it wasn't funny.
@216trixie 8 жыл бұрын
wherein Bill steals his biggest laugh from South Park.
@Mgranadosv 8 жыл бұрын
This was awesome
@mysteryreadertheoriginal2145 8 жыл бұрын
I argue it's the best ever from Bill, I wonder if he can top it.
@seraseely6570 8 жыл бұрын
That Young Lady wearing the 'Proud of My B.S' Mortarboard must have graduated from Liberty University!
@sourabhtiwri 6 жыл бұрын
So funny & imaginative
@personthingunodos 8 жыл бұрын
Oh my God.
@liammaxcampbell 8 жыл бұрын
did anyone else notice the battlestars flying in the background? +1 nerd
@jacobzaranyika9334 3 жыл бұрын
You have my attention...
@vincentadultman8527 8 жыл бұрын
A baby born in 2018 would not yet be eligible for any seat in Congress (HouseOfR) in 2041.
@anna-river 8 жыл бұрын
SATIRE
@aliensarerealancient 8 жыл бұрын
Wait... this wasn't a real commencement speech from 2041?! oh what the fuck Bill Maher... unsubscribed!
@DyenamicFilms 8 жыл бұрын
That eligibility rule was changed in 2034.
@brennanleslie850 3 жыл бұрын
I love the Don Shula quote.
@dasking2120 8 жыл бұрын
his laugh I halrious
@egyptianluvr9223 3 жыл бұрын
Zika-18 and Kanye-20 oof who tf would've thought Bill was clairvoyant?
@joryjones6808 6 жыл бұрын
2041 is 23 years away not 25, now I know why you think college is BS.
@truther4realze237 8 жыл бұрын
Sweet.
@sushanalone 8 жыл бұрын
Note to self: buy all the canned oysters and hide them in my dooms day bunker.
@Cyfix15 8 жыл бұрын
chief justice McConaughey gets me every time
@CynAnne1 8 жыл бұрын
I actually liked that proposal...he'd be far more empathetic than anyone the GOP's offered up recently. ;)
@Cyfix15 8 жыл бұрын
"you have any drugs?....you'd be a lot a cooler if you did :D"
@CynAnne1 8 жыл бұрын
SoldierCyfix - "Yes, your Awesomeness, I was carrying...yes sir, it was the 'good stuff'..." xD
@simransimran9339 8 жыл бұрын
Is this the library planet from Dr. Who?
@e.g.3924 8 жыл бұрын
Your limit is how much money you have and who you know.
@mehrshadvr4 8 жыл бұрын
lmao good one.
@Neojhun 8 жыл бұрын
Oh gawd I hope this does not become a documentary. Predictions like this have become true far too often.
@tinyturnip7676 8 жыл бұрын
And everybody looks down on me for not going to college...
@bonniemccarley3355 7 жыл бұрын
I BOW TO THE MASTER!!!!!
@ivonedefigueiredo9301 7 жыл бұрын
This one is Epic!
@Able_Hotel42 8 жыл бұрын
I hope I can find this video in 2041
@gothicalpha 8 жыл бұрын
This was too depressing, sheesh it was your generation that did this to both the planet and my generation.... The debt and planet wide pollution plus the wars...
@mathiasmorqubus 8 жыл бұрын
To all college grads. Mike's Venti is now available.
@REbones714 8 жыл бұрын
I'm from the future and I can confirm all these statements.
@michellehuffer5180 8 жыл бұрын
Zika & Jesus comments hysterical!!!!
@mastercabbage 8 жыл бұрын
jesus christ. this guy is too funny.
@CrashPreinsertion 8 жыл бұрын
Trump really should have a Kardashian as his running mate.
@stormwatcher59 8 жыл бұрын
oh for christ sake...don't give him any ideas!!!!
@maironcalion7041 2 жыл бұрын
Love you bill ❤️
@skidude13us 8 жыл бұрын
After Jesus said 'fuck you', I literally couldn't stop laughing, having to catch the rest of it here!
@istvansipos9940 7 жыл бұрын
wow :- )
@wildfirekristin 8 жыл бұрын
Bwhaaaaa so funny✌💙😂
@frankdavis8269 8 жыл бұрын
Did anyone else actually feel depressed looking at that hypothetical future?
@fighterdow 8 жыл бұрын
aye, I hope I die before then without kids lol
@Hooli630 8 жыл бұрын
Which song is that?
@judybohl7789 8 жыл бұрын
Haha. Quarantine America!
@NoName-ch2wg 6 жыл бұрын
👍🏼WELL SAID👍🏼
@some1udontknow84 8 жыл бұрын
Why did this *New Rules* episode feel especially vicious??
@JulietteChico 8 жыл бұрын
My goodness, we'll all be living in Fallout 4.
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