Robert Henderson: Prayer to Break Off Depression & Hope Deferred (Proverbs 13:12)
Robert speaks at the Mantles Conference at King of Kings Worship Center on 10/28/2022.
Quotes: “You feel like it hurts too much to get your hopes up and then have them dashed again. So I'm just not going to get them up anymore. So that's where I was. My daughter said, "Dad, I know this is God. I know this is what he intends. We’ve got to do something about this." Then she said, "I've always known you would change the world." It was like a dagger into my heart because I suddenly realized my daughter had hopes and dreams for me that I had given up on. I said, "God, you're going to have to heal my heart from disappointments.”
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So God wants us to move in the realms of influence. I mean, I heard the Lord, some of you all have heard this. But 30 years ago, I heard the word of the Lord as I was praying in a setting where the weight of God's presence was there and I heard God say to me, I wasn't trying to hear something, I wasn't thinking about myself. I was just enjoying the weight of God's presence in that moment and God spoke to me and he said, "I will make your name as one of the great men of the earth".
Now here's what I thought, I had just about two or three years before that birthed a church and so this is what I immediately thought. "Oh, this church is going to become really large and everybody's going to know who I am." Well, guess what, that never happened. And so time progressed and every time an opportunity would come or a door would open, I would think, "Oh, this is the way God's going to fulfill that word".
It never happened. In fact, many times I would be promised things that I would think this is the way God's going to do it and then that thing that I had been promised wouldn't even materialize. It would be sabotaged somehow or another. I remember after I'd written the book on operating in the courts of heaven, the first one, Charisma contacted me because somehow they know what's selling out there. Because my daughter, it was a self-published book because nobody would publish it when I wrote it.
Dutch Sheets told me, "The reason they won't publish it is because they're afraid of it." So he had told me that and he had told me this is a really good book. He said, "You're actually answering questions for me that I've had myself that I didn't know what the answer was". So, you know, there were people that were saying good things about it to me, but nobody would publish it. So what happened was my daughter, she was doing my, you know, helping with my administration. She sold 100,000 copies of that book out of her garage. Now that's a lot of books to go out of a little garage. You might just do the math and might figure out how I say God has blessed us.
So she sold 100,000 copies out of her garage and it got so overwhelming that we were trying to handle it that people started coming in asking could they acquire the book and Charisma was one of them. Charisma wanted the book. And so they had emailed the office and my daughter called me all excited because she said, "Dad", because nobody would give me the time of day. I remember Dr. Wagner, Peter Wagner looked at me one day and he said, "Robert, you've got to get these books published", and I said, "Dr. Wagner, they won't publish them.”
I mean, he was angry at me. I said, "But I don't know what you want me to do. When you publish a book, they've either got to know your name, or they've got to have an awareness that you're somebody that somebody's going to pay attention to". Well, nobody would give me the time of day. So I was just doing what I did. My daughter called me, she said, "Dad, Charisma wants your book." It was like, oh my gosh, somebody actually wants something I have. But see, I had been so disappointed so many times for 30 years that I said, "Oh, okay," and she could tell I wasn't excited. Now why wasn't I excited?
Because I had been disappointed so many times that I was filled with hope deferred because I'd just given up. I was just doing life and doing ministry and doing what I did. I didn't have vision left in me because I couldn't figure out why nothing ever seemed to work. And so I'm in this state and my daughter says, "Dad, they want your book", I know this is God, Dad, I know that this is the Lord. I know that this is what you're supposed to be doing". And she's going on and on because she's very prophetic. So she's going on and on and she's not getting from me the response she thinks she should be getting because I'm full of hope deferred.