@meredith7236 that means you haven’t reached the higher frequency of THAT conciousness (yet) 😊

Yes l am sure you can❤

Same- left an abusive relationship after our son shot himself and now husband says he’s in therapy and wants to be the person I deserve - even if it’s true how do I not remind myself each time I see him?

@@larguello1…..How do you not remind yourself of what? Your son’s unfortunate and tragic suicide…..or the abuse of your husband…..or both? Are you seeing a psychologist or another qualified counsellor? I do not know you, your husband, your son, or the whole situation. So, I can’t really say anything. But if you choose to go to couple’s counselling with your husband, I would still suggest that you find a therapist/psychologist that you can talk to alone, regarding how you truly feel. I’ve been able to let out many a therapeutic SCREAM in her office, when I can’t do that anywhere else. I have seen many tragedies played out in my own life and that of other family members. It can be really twisted and complicated in abusive situations. I just know that speaking for myself, I can’t ‘do this’ any longer. I’ve got to get away from the abuse. I grew up in an abusive household….father beating my mother, them becoming alcoholics…..siblings becoming alcoholics and drug addicts. But I was neither. It’s hard being ‘straight’ while everyone else around you is getting high and abusive. I’ve since learned about narcissism and psychopathy…..my siblings are both. And my current husband? He’s getting more and more abusive as time goes on. I feel dead inside. I have no more love to give to him…..he basically stomped on it. My first husband died…..but there’s a lot to ‘our story’ too. My son and his wife have been living with us for the last 5 years. She is clearly a narcissistic psychopath. My son believes her, whatever she says. I need to get out. I never felt like this was my home anyway. I just want out of here. They all smoke pot and cigarettes…..ruined my antique Victorian sofa and the upholstery fabric I had bought for it out in the garage. My cherry China hutch and 10-seat Cherry dining table got ruined out in the rain…..long story there…..but husband just simply didn’t care. I had bought them with my first husband in better times. I am expected to care about their things…..but mine? Oh hell no. Oh, the reason my son and his wife moved in, was because he needed a place to live…..he ran out of options…..they were kicked out of their apartment in Oregon, and they needed my help…..so they came here (Arizona), so that he could get ‘dried out’ in an alcohol rehab. He failed the first time, went back into rehab and has been off of alcohol since. His wife is the main reason they were kicked out…..she would get in the face of their manager of the apartments, when they were drunk. Let me tell you, she does NOT need to be drunk to get into a scream fest with someone…..and has been picking fights with me and disregarding what should be proper boundaries! My son and my husband get angry at me if I object to her crossing my boundaries! No one comes to my defence! Even though they will tell me that what she is doing is wrong…..they just don’t want to hear it! So I am just supposed to suffer in silence…..while she runs everything! I don’t know what you are going through. I know of narcissists/psychopaths in my family, that would do and say anything to get someone to come back to them…..give them another chance……only to be more abusive the next time…..like knocking one them out cold! Watching videos on KZfaq about that explains it. They will do and say anything to get the results that they are after…..they’ll even cry tears…..then, the reason that they are even more abusive than before, is because they think that you are stupid for trusting them in the first place…..knowing who they were before……even though they claim they will change THIS time. I don’t doubt that there probably have been some who have changed, and everything was better. But in my talks with ‘professionals’, they say that the chances of someone changing like that are extremely slim. Only you know how your own ‘gut’ feels on this matter. If you do decide to stay with your husband, and he does become a better person, great! But, in the event that he starts out acting like a nice guy, but then starts to get even worse than before, you better have an exit plan to a place of safety FAST…..as I’ve heard that they can be more abusive with each time that they are taken back…..again, they blame you for being stupid enough to trust them. (I’m not calling you stupid, I’m just repeating what therapists in KZfaq videos have said…..they say that the abuser looks at the other person as being stupid and therefore deserving of the abuse). No one deserves abuse, but these folks brains are not wired like ‘normal’ people’s brains…..they live to hurt others…..it’s the only way that they feel alive, the only way that they feel power, the only way that they feel joy. I remember reading an article on why these folks cannot and will not change……short of a lobotomy. This article was showing brain scans on just what makes these folks tick. The reward/pleasure centers of their brains lit up when they were causing harm to another…..but not when they were kind or doing something nice. Which would explain why they can’t STAY nice…..it doesn’t make them feel good. Their brains are wired differently. They are compelled to chaos and destruction as their mode of joy. (They are of their father, the devil?). Knowing this now, I know what I NEED to do, if I am to have any joy in my life…..and to be safe! These folks are sick in the head, but point their fingers back at me instead…..simply because I am outnumbered by them. I’ve had enough of being disregarded, gaslighted, and just flat out ganged up on. I just need to get away from them! May God bless us to be happy and safe!

You can only control you. Be nice and move on. Find friends who support you.

That is the time to just leave the room - and clear your mind and heart from their bad energies. Just leave the room - get out for a walk. JUST LIKE THAT. AVOID SPENDING TIME WIRH THEM. Avoid them. Tell them - “Your anger is making you look like a monster.” “ this is a hateful and angry thing to say” Or ask them “why are you so angry? Can you tell me the same things in a quiet tone? Family is a very profound effect on a human being. You seem to be a young person, it is up to you to avoid this affecting you. Because not all people are like that and you’ll find good people who will tell you and talk with you normally in the truth and tell you where you went wrong on what you did well and they’re not gonna be yelling at you… Or at each other… Please know this is what your family is doing is profoundly wrong - and you can change that

I love this and totally appreciate your comment thank you thank you thank you ❤❤❤❤​@@StyleViewStudio

Meditation and visualisation (clarity what you want) is the methodology!