For me I was going too soft at first is because I never wanted to injure anyone.

I'm a 50 year old above knee amputee, white belt with zero strips. I started training in February 2023, but I trained for several years before losing my leg. I reached purple belt, but when I started training again, I decided to start over at white belt because it's been 24 years since I trained last and I had 2 legs back then. I've had to relearn techniques and how to move around on the mat. I've also had to modify techniques and also my style. Because of my previous training, I know how to relax and flow, although it took me a couple of months to get back to that. I prefer training with the higher belts because they know how to relax and flow, and let me work and learn, while the white belts just want to go hard and use strength. I always feel like they're trying to kill me, which takes all of the fun out of Jiu-Jitsu. Glad I found this podcast. Keep up the good work, fellas.

I’m a white belt and this is great. Glad to be growing alongside this channel

“What’s 3 months in 10 years” is exactly what I needed to hear

White belt no stripes. Listening to the first stage I realized that I have 4 kids and 3 of them are 4 and under so I am already a broken horse. I'm on the mats to learn not kill. At 40 y/o the only people that are going to get that much violence and aggression out of me are the ones that have no business pushing me that far. Most of the guys and girls I train with, no matter the belt, are all chill AF. If someone is coming at me strong I tend to only practice my defense. No need to injure myself trying to be a man and get a submission. I have to work tomorrow and my kids still need to be held and feed.

54 year old white belt here. I've only been training for a few months, and it's so much harder than I expected. Seeing the other older students post here is encouraging. I appreciate the perspective you two provide. That phase of knowing I don't know anything is really difficult to work through. And, its not just about executing the movements properly. Its about attitude and culture and humility, and dozens of other intangible topics, which you guys did a great job expressing. I'm completely lost when you guys talk about 50/50 and playing the game, but that's due to my own complete ignorance and I'm confident one day I'll be on the mats, and it will click. At least now I know to be looking for it. Thanks for putting this out there!

Great pod cast! 57 year old with bad shoulders. I love it! I have instructor's that could be my kids and I call them sir and thank them for there help. Every instructor that I have had goes out of their way to help and encourage me. My only regret is of course I wish I would have started 20 years earlier.

First month into Jits at 47 years old and have been looking for a podcast like this since I started....it is so difficult to find expert yet calm and humble advice online...without all the bs. As a white belt, my main aim at the moment has been to stay relaxed and be a good rolling partner, someone that people want to roll with...I see growth for me personally, more from doing rather than watching. You guys are great and have just subscribed, looking forward to checking out your other content 👍👍

Just discovered your channel this week. Appreciated this episode. I'm a 40 year old white belt. I'm living in the land of CONSCIOUS IGNORANCE. I am aware that I don't know much and everything requires so much thinking and brain energy and my execution is a grind. The real tools of success for me so far has been attendance, sincere effort, a sense of humor and an understanding that I'm playing with house money. Its open season for me to fail and fail good. My main responsibility is to show with and empty cup.

I began last year at 49. I gotta go to work the next day. I’ll just say there was a ton of laughter at how terrible I was and am. Fellas at the gym were/are good crew. Here for the ride. Here to learn. Subscribing to this now. Preciate you guys.

man I like the vibe, u guys covered a lot of great stuff, thanks.

This was a great episode thank you for the time you kindly took to make this episode I recently got my blue belt and know I have so much to learn keeping that glass empty. Thank you again.

Love the episode can’t wait to see you guys get even better at podcasting!!

I am in the Pre-Blue Belt Blues. Been training for 2 years, relaxing more, retaining and executing more, but not consistently. Plenty of good days and off days. Surviving most rolls with Blue Belts, semi-frequently surprising them with a sweep or sub they didn't expect. (Picked up a Kimura grip in bottom half guard and used it to reverse position last night for example) Seeming to become a more fun roll for purps and up. I am just focusing on having fun. I love the human chess, cerebral yet physical aspect and just focus on that. Honestly, I would still do Jits even if there were no belts/promotions. I would do it because it is a fun workout that helps me better prepare to protect myself and my family.

Subscribed. New to BJJ, though I'd wanted to explore it for years. Thanks for the wisdom.

For my second day my master had me roll with a purple belt with roughly 8 years of experience BJJ/Judo etc. Went three rounds, he was sweating a lot, so I think I did a decent job, although I got sweeped so many times lol. I was so exhausted, it was great and I thanked him. I work 6 days a week, awkward hours so I can only get in 3 days a week at max unfortunately.

Thanks guys! Great insight!

Perfect… the right flow to grow Excellent insight

this is a nice jiu jitsu podcast thanks for hosting this

I am 3 months in and very thankful for this...❤

Solid insight.

This is such a great video and so recognizable. Especially the going to soft part because I'm quite a big guy and I was/am still afraid of really hurting someone. I've been training for almost 6 months (twice a week) and lately I've attended a few seminars too. The last three weeks I felt like nothing was working for me and first I thought it was just an overload on new techniques/information that made me lose focus (tried to focus on everything at once). But yesterday after I watched this video I resorted back to focusing on breathing and also playing during sparring. And its safe to say yesterday's session turned out alot better and it was so much more fun! So thank you for the advice :)

It’s a humbling experience but enjoyable.

Thank you. I feel like this was made for me.

Good talk guys thanks

As I white belt, I've always thought it weird for some schools to make new comers (less than 15 lessons) roll.. I never knew what rolling was, what I was supposed to do and why I was doing it. We'd be drilling in class, but there was no way I could apply that while live sparring so why am I doing it?? Just to have higher belts sub me constantly whilst I pose zero threat??? lol. Much better when you've got a month or more of lessons so that you can roll (even with VERY limited defenses and positions) with purpose. Keep up the great work guys!!!!! 🔥

Been a few months in a learned very early: slow down, stay tight. These 2 alone helped me have enough energy to get more rolls in per session, and not get submitted as much

White belt going too soft here. For me its a mix of decision making. Trying to not injure anyone. And most importantly. Im not going to survive the whole class if im not goint soft. Cardio wise . And partly its for my own injury prevention too. Im worried if i ramp it up. Theylll escalate and eventually we hit a spot where injury is more likely. Definitely an issue i need to work on.

Dope asf can you guys give your insight on comp finding the balance between aggression and flowing like finding that sweet spot

Im a 3 stripe white belt. I know i am going to get my 4th stripe in the next month or 2. But i dont feel like i have gained enough knowledge to be there. I dont win rolls against blue belts and im a 50/50 with white belts. I want to compete, but i dont want to embarress myself. I feel like im stuck in my skillset. Your video has enlightened my view on rolling and what to take away from rolling. Im hoping that it will further my journey.

I am 56. I was a multi sport endurance coach for 8 years (swim, bike, run, triathlon). After 3 years of only base training (at best) I started my Jiu Jitsu journey. I fought tournament Judo in college and Navy, and figured that they were similar, but far from the same. My first practice was a complete eye-opener physically. Even knowing how to regulate my output, I was still gassed by my second roll. I am fascinated by Jiu Jitsu and was prepared with the "empty cup" approach to learning. I have yet to tournament fight (June '24), I am really looking forward to it. Its not the destination, its the journey. Great episode! Thanks!

Just started the BJJ journey earlier this week and I’m only 2 sessions in but I’ve had the best time doing it. I’ve been doing Muay Thai for about 3 years so I know what it’s like to start from the beginning and know absolutely nothing which really helped me in this because I know everyone in there can tap me, but because of that I’ve been rolling with black belts, purple belts, blue belts and even white belts and everyone has helped me, given me critiques, and we’ve laughed and had a good time after the rolls. Going in with the mindset of knowing you know nothing truly is a lot better and makes for a much better experience than thinking you do know something because everyone gets humbled at some point. There’s always a bigger fish 🙌

24 yo female belt here. Started only this month. Honestly, I was humbled by purple and blue belts pretty fast. Yeah, I have a judo experience, also boxing, but after my first little injury I changed my mind and attitude from “trying my best and hardest” to “finding peace and trying to figure things out throwing my ego in the trash completely. I knew before that my technique suck, but now I openly admit it because I still try to understand how to memorize things better. Plus trying to compensate my lack of skills with strength didn’t really work 😂 guys just mop floors with me or open me like a can of beans 😅 Now I am focused also on stretching and strengthening my muscles and body, mind in general. And taking criticism with a lot of humor.

started bjj few months before covid and i progressed really fast, then boom knee injury knee surgery, i got back to training then boom covid, lockdowns, depression, after covid got back to training for a year i was really into it i was feeling it then boom right knee injury, 2 months off back into training for a few months again same thing i felt great, i love rolling im getting better i can do multiple submissions now but again boom i got hit by a car and now im here, i will still get back to training :)

I’m a 2 stripe white belt been training consistently for a year today it hit me while I was rolling that I was doin some movements without having to think about then it was a cool moment for me cuz usually I jjst feel lost or have to really think about stuff

I commented about 7 months ago when I first started doing jujitsu under a Gracie University certified training center.. After about a year of doing the combatatives. Which include 36 different techniques and drills. I just got promoted. And moved on to the most advanced class the master cycle class. Which has your full-on sparring. After seeing a lot of comments from people who just started jujitsu.white belts Starting out and having to go to schools. That start sparring right from the first class. I realized the advantage that I had going into sparring for my first time after having gone through the first gracie university classes and learning the 36 techniques. I was well more aware, even though I had never sparred. I had an understanding of positions. Certain things for like an elevator sweep or elbow escape from mount. Or understanding side control and half guard and things like that. I was a lot more comfortable than it seems like a lot of other white Belts when they first started full sparring. Considering im in my 40s its been such a great experience

I was the crossfit guy. I thought I’d be ok until about 90 seconds in. 😂 Jiujitsu has made me so much more efficient; it’s awesome.

A lot of things resonates with me. I don’t think I was ever stage one tho, I knew I’d get humbled from day one. First class rolled with my coach who’s 65kg and I was 105kg. Let me say It was both frightening and impressive 😂

Cool vid. Can you do 1 for purple belts

I’m fresh white belt probably 15 lessons in definitely the nail getting hammered. Hard to keep going as I know I get beat up and out of breath pretty quick . Lots of learning to do but can see why people get hooked on it once you can hold your own a bit. Also some of the other white belts trying wild moves with no technique and real fast close to bad knee injuries twice already it worry’s me.

32 year old white belt. I have a bit of wrestling experience so going slow is something I’m learning. It’s hard for me (in the moment) to not use speed and strength to move into or out of positions. I’m working on it though. Also I must say I have so much respect for my fellow white belts who started with no grappling experience. It was crazy enough for me with grappling experience I couldn’t imagine being completely green.

Thank you for the insight in this video. I am 30 and starting BJJ this upcoming week and I’m 100% expecting to get tapped by everyone I roll with. I have a background in wrestling but it’s been 12 years since I’ve ever practiced it. I am really interested in Gi (I’m sure I’ll do some NoGi eventually) but had a question I’m hoping you could answer if you have a moment. With Gi training, does every grip have to be a Gi grip? What comes to mind is snapping down an opponent and going for the front headlock with a hand on the chin. Is that allowed in Gi?

Hey, love the content, I've had the privilege to roll with you a few times Gym-o. I had knee reconstruction surgery, haven't been rolling since middle last year. Didn't know if you had any advice on about starting back wrestling and jitsu After knee surgery.

I have pretty low self esteem, which honestly made starting jiu jitsu easier in terms of thinking I was gonna do anything right.

Im about to begin learning jiu jitsu. I've watched a number of videos - one thing that worries me a little bit is levering too hard on someone's arm or shoulder and causing an injury (because i don't know what I'm doing).

When I go soft it’s usually because I’m being nice, it’s a lower belt, or I’m rolling with a woman. I’m only 180 but I’m strong for my weight, so I don’t want to hurt anyone especially when training.

Hi guys I know what you're saying about questioning techniques etc, but I've found that sometimes due to my body type/size and joints etc that the moves I'm shown don't work for me. I often have to adjust, especially the darce (mine is more of a modified Japanese necktie). My coach said to me that this isn't Karate where you must stick to the forms exactly, and sometimes we need to find our own way of doing things. I know this isn't what you were suggesting with regards to the bigger guys using strength but isn't this technically not following the syllabus too? No arguments here, I'm just entering a discussion. 🙏

I go into class excited about hopefully getting better and being awesome and I always leave feeling violated and defeated but uplifted by classmates and encouraged and the other day I got attacked on my job because I work in a psych hospital. I realized real quick that had actually been learning quite a lot and had the old lady subdued pretty quickly lol kidding it was a 6’3 man.

Im about to start bjj again in an mma gym, i did jiujitsu for a while in the past and had to stop cos i didnt have enough money, i left as a whitebelt so, its more likely that i will start from 0... but ive been practicing another martial art with ground grappling for a few years called sipalki, and i was thinking that it might bring bad habits to practice a different style for so long? Other than avoiding doing wristlocks and neck cranks wich are allowed in sipalki... what advice do you have for someone who comes from another style and wants to start from 0 instead of letting that experience affect their training experience?

Man...that using your hammer part is me to a T...gonna switch it up and not get to my go for awhile

I started off too hard. Always getting injured, and now I go slower and am more cognizant. Starting to learn the flow but I'm still always exhausted at the end.

4 stripe white belt about to turn 45. Oh the pre blue belt blues is real. Most times I feel like it’s my first day all over again and I can’t remember anything.

Wrestlers step on the mat with the exact opposite mentality to the one you’re prescribing and smash every purple belt in your gym

you dudes are cool

I train when I compete and and someone does something that pisses me off I would say i kinda see red. "When I see red" I will turn up what I do. Did it in wrestling also. I am kinda a laid back wrestler tell someone does something dirty. Only problem I had was I could never just turn it on when I want to.

I just finished my 4th class. We're doing positional sparring in side control. I find myself being on opposite ends of the spectrum. Either going to soft or too hard. I want to be a good sparring partner so people will want to roll and practice with me. I sometimes let people get things that I shouldn't, and I'm probably giving them bad feedback on their subs.

You guys give off this vibe that you are really into your ego. Your context is only your context.

What do you guys think of the gracie combatives program

My question is, rolling with these bigger guys that are blue they are mostly laying on top of me. They will not look for a submission or try. They are just using there weight to tire you out. Time and time again. Its starting to get to me. Im 5'6 white belt. I get what they are doing. Trying to tire me out. My thing is i want to learn but how can i learn when every time i roll if i end up on my back thats it. Just smother me until the clock runs out. Its super annoying. Every time i roll with brown or black even purple. I have the best time. I learn.. alot of the blue belts in my classes are 250 lean. And just wont work with you. Is this common ?

I'm a fresh blue belt, like 2 months and I'm at that point where I just stop everybody and rarely submit people. I sweep and control but I have trouble submitting people and I think I still go too soft regardless of how hard my training partner goes. It's a little annoying.

BJJ white belt no stripe but 20 plus years of wrestling and Muay Thai. It's humbling for sure but it's also astounding how much I can hang with higher ranks because of some transferable skills. Everyone thinks I'm using cheat codes or was the greatest wrestler ever. Like no I just competed a LOT

I'm in the old out of shape man getting his ass kicked by former wrestlers that are 25 years younger phase. Goal number one is just staying healthy enough to continue training and build up my cardio. Sucks to be a white belt.

Just started training two months ago. I'm a pretty lightweight guy (about 120 pounds), so I have a hard time lol. Being in bottom side control sucks against guys who are bigger and stronger. But to compensate for my physical limitations, I learn pretty quickly. Seeing a technique once is often enough to be able to imitate it (unless it's very difficult), and I can even do the technique in sparring. Last training I hit an overhead sweep on a blue belt, and he said he didn't see it coming, but I had never trained or drilled it, I saw someone else use it and then I copied it during sparring. I never use much strength during sparring (because I don't have a lot, so I'm not going to win that battle anyway) so I always try to go technical, controlled and slow. And I know I suck anyway, so I don't mind being smashed by everyone. So I'm always pretty humble and friendly. But there was this big guy of 214 pounds, and right before we started rolling, he said: "I'm going to teach you to hate people who are bigger and stronger than you." And I thought he was just joking but then he proceeded to put his entire weight on me during the roll (and it was positional sparring so we had to start in side control each time of all positions..) clearly trying to crush me with his weight and making sure I couldnt breathe. Then he got in my closed guard and proceeded to collar choke me, and he put the choke on so hard and quickly (punching his full weight into my throat) that I started to pass out in just two seconds. I tried doing an armbar on him (because "you should never be able to choke someone while in their closed guard") but I started to pass out almost immediately so I didn't have the time. I had red spots on my neck from his choke for a week and my throat was sore. I asked him why he was going so hard, and he said that it was "an important learning experience for small people like me to feel what a difference in weight and strength felt like. Especially for real life self-defense encounters." Thanks man. As if I didn't already know that.

I watched a lot of mma and bjj prior to taking a bjj class. I was accused of having trained before but never did formally. I accepted that I would get smashed but when it came to sparring, even as a 20 year old ,skinny, weak,day one beginner my ego got the better of me, convinced myself that I would beat some guys lol. I got smashed I’m now 27 year old and a brown belt. I must have been about 64 kg at 6’1 on my first day. I’m now 82 kg. Without jiu jitsu I’ll still probably be very skinny and weak lol On a side note regarding ego, some of the most egotistical and narcissistic people I ever met were high ranked/competitive black belts. Jiu jitsu doesn’t get rid of ego, it just enhances if if one is already an asshole

I think it's pretty normal in the first stage to use strength and go all out when you don't know any techniques. It's all you have to rely on. My only problem is those that are spazzy.

What’s the difference between a Jiu Jitsu practitioner, professor, and player?

1 year in no stripe white. I 50/50 a Black Belt for majority of a roll and at the end he told me I frustrated him and forced him to adjust his game. Got a bunch of blue/ white taps don't even count the easy ones anymore. 1 purple and 2 brown and 1 3 stripe Black. Needless to say I know the ones over blue can all beat me at will, but the taps I got I earned. They didn't expect me to even know the subs😂. If I get it my way I will never get promoted 😂 White belt in bjj is one of the coolest, funnest and most frustrating things that I have ever done. White belt for ever!

Yo the guy on the right looks like encino man

I'm 72, 140lbs, a few months into jiu-jitsu. Some white belts will use their strength on me rather than leverage, technique, timing.

The amount of learning is infinite, so no matter how much I know, it's relatively "nothing". And, I understand that.

Hi I want take it up but it seems like a lot people are busting up their kness

There’s exceptions to the rule but in my experience guys that come in with that “1st stage” mentality don’t keep training for a long time.

Just trying to figure out what “too hard” and “too soft” is at this point. God it’s a battle in its own

You can tell that y'alls ego play a big role in your everyday. Stop focuses on others ego, and focus on yours. More than once to a trained ear you have alluded to your own insecurities and ego. If a new person is talking to you about the move that may be how they learn, teaching is learning. To someone with an ego and a certain amount of ignorance this will come off as the student trying to teach master, but that is the masters ego blinding him from the reality of the situation. Put your ego aside, listen to the student, if you are secure in yourself you can do that and not be offended and not feel like you have to correct them. If you know what the right way is then be confident in that, dont fight the student. Also, you cannot fit people into stages, you are stetting your self up for failure and disappointment. You can always tell who the guys where that walked in with no real athletic ability and had to put in a lot of time and effort to become average vs the guys that are athletic and animals who just need to be trained and tamed.

Podcast would be good if it wasn't a 1:1 ratio of Podcast to advertisments

Im a White Belt been training for 2 Months now. I Rolled With my Instructor Mark for the 1st Time. He Knows I've been a Wrestler for a Very long time and After our Roll, He Goes "i Have to Take advantage of My Wrestlers"🤣 after he says That I Just Need to Learn The Game Of BJJ💯 So perfect timing on me Finding this Video.

Apparently shaving and a getting a haircut is not one of those stages

Not sure if I’m going to soft or not being offensive….?

4 minutes into and bro are you covering a knot on your head?

1:45 *rambling too much - get to the point guys, thanks!*

These guys get smashed by wrestlers and cry about it

This lame af

Yall need some time stamps. Ya can’t have 45 minutes of slow rambling and expect everyone to sit through the WHOLE thing.

I like to start slow (soft) and have my training partners get into an advantageous position (mount, side control etc) and then I like to go from a defensive position to an offensive position. That way I can work on my pin escapes and bad positions and then work on offense from there. Is this strategy or my "opinion" of personal development flawed? Although I do mix it up once in a while. But I try to go slow and work positions.

My first day I rolled with a black belt. He went for a take down I immediately knee-d him in the face and went to finish him with some ground and pound. Realized I am too tough for this and I was out of the dojo while everyone was in shock. Another day in the office for me. Just kidding. It’s good to embrace the suck. Can’t wait to be tapped out 20 times a round.