Stoicism's Tips For Solving Problems With People

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Күн бұрын

Ryan Holiday breaks down his strategies for how the Stoic responds to problems with people.
It’s a fact of life that we will encounter rude people. It happens every day. People cut in line. People lie and take credit for your work. Not only will this happen, but many times there will be no consequences for this.
00:00 Intro
00:58 Care Less About People's Opinion
01:55 Be Honest
02:27 Don't Take Things Personally
03:19 Be Patient
4:15 Be An Example
4:52 Tune Out The Haters
05:53 Be Full OF Love
06:47 Stop Comparing Yourself To Others
07:46 Cherish Your Loved Ones
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Stoicism is a practical philosophy. The main thinkers that the Daily Stoic focuses on in stoicism are Marcus Aurelius, Epictetus, and Seneca. The Daily Stoic is a guide to how to practice Stoicism in your daily life, the daily routines of Stoicism, and is a practical guide to Stoicism. This channel is Stoicism 101, it will tell you what Stoicism is and how to be a Stoic. Ryan Holiday has been practicing stoicism and writing about stoicism for more than a decade and his insights will give you guidance to practicing stoicism in your day to day life.
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@mikeg3439 2 жыл бұрын

53 years has taught me to have very low expectations of people and to guard against this. The result has been I'm very very rarely surprised or upset at the conduct of others. Once in a while I'm delighted at the goodness of someone and it brightens my day.

@marikalathem813 2 жыл бұрын

Mike G: an interesting and likely brilliant approach to dealing with the human condition✌️

@deconstructedbyrishabh6415 2 жыл бұрын

Beautiful

@YoHo18 2 жыл бұрын

My dad used to say exactly that to me.

@lexiemaep7930 2 жыл бұрын

I have yet to see any goodness...where do you find these "good" people?😅

@marikalathem813 2 жыл бұрын

@@lexiemaep7930 : oh my goodness, I had to reply… so true✌️ Edit: isn’t that why we are all on these channels…? Trying to make sense of the craziness we have encountered…?

@nichole2757 2 жыл бұрын

A note on giving empathy toward people who make a mistake; be sure to protect yourself in those situations and be sure that you’re not just enabling a cycle of abuse. But generally being a more forgiving person is a beautiful thing

@DefundTheFringes 2 жыл бұрын

Like the times when narcissists appear to care about others.

@tos100returns Жыл бұрын

Forgive them before you cast them into The Cold Abyss for their transgressions.

@chuck1804 Жыл бұрын

Hear, hear! "Be compassionate, but alert to narcissism" should be a modern day hallmark of stoicism.

@joincoffee9383 Жыл бұрын

The advice to be patient with bad behaviors is totally wrong when it’s a narcissist or cluster B personalities you are dealing with. It is gaslighting the victims, making them even more confused. it prolongs and deepen their suffering. Psychopath sociopath, narcissist, borderlines, these abusive personalities needs the opposite of patience.

@zorbathegeek Жыл бұрын

You can give someone empathy, but also give them a wide path in the future, I would suggest.

@FFLL2112 Жыл бұрын

2 things: 1) When treated bad or talked down to, I literally say to myself I’m so glad I’m not like you and then I say or do something positive in return. There’s a huge wave of positive emotion that comes from focusing 100% on your positive reaction.. not their negative infringement 2) in life, don’t use any negative language. Every word has an energy.. every curse word is negative.. don’t attach any negative energy to any of your words and watch your life change almost instantly

@jackhaugh Жыл бұрын

That’s not true at all. If you yell out “F*** Yeah” at a concert when your favorite band plays your favorite song, it’s actually very positive!

@dmreddragon6 Жыл бұрын

@@FFLL2112 -Why would we go to church? Why would we yell in a quiet environment? I do like your #1 though. Thank you for sharing that.

@Rino37 Жыл бұрын

@@FFLL2112context matters. Life is full of nuance. Thinking in black and white can be problematic sometimes.

@1summerflower Жыл бұрын

❤🎉

@andrewhunter9119 Жыл бұрын

@FFLL2112 and why not? I would gladly go to a church and yell out fuck yeah. If it were a normal place for the crowd to express themselves i dont see why not. If a church ostracizes you for positively expressing that you support the church...wouldnt that make the church exactly the kind of evil or "shitty ppl" he keeps reffering to this whole video. This outdated boomer logic of curse words are BAD is antiquated. Words are words. Intent is whats important. Its the same gun argument. Guns arent inherently evil just as words arent. Whats evil or good is how theyre used. Stop hating ppl for speaking their comfortable dialect, you beautiful son of a bitch!

@manckid7795 2 жыл бұрын

I loved that: “you’d be envious of yourself if you didn’t have the things you have right now” on comparing yourself to others. Thank you❤️

@gj9933 2 жыл бұрын

Yes this resonated with me so much! I will do this thought exercise from now on.

@nineteenfortyeight6762 Жыл бұрын

Counterproductive if you don't have much

@ElRammo 11 ай бұрын

@@nineteenfortyeight6762you could have less. It always applies.

@jackiesantangelo6610 2 жыл бұрын

The Four Agreements - took me years to stop taking life personally. The world is indifferent to me, people aren't out to hurt me, they want to enrich themselves. I choose Joy everyday. Good one, Texas Son.

@MrAllywood79 2 жыл бұрын

Won't recommend The four agreement?

@classygary 2 жыл бұрын

So sorry but oh yes indeed some are specifically out to hurt you… if only by enriching themselves with their indifference . There’s is nothing worse than indifference.

@chicagobearstj20 2 жыл бұрын

The Four Agreements was lent to me when I was travelling at it is to this day still on of the best books I’ve read especially about taking things personally, it’s crazy you know inside but you can’t explain it in full why you’re anxious etc. That’s why I feel like these books help understand better

@ivoryquays6661 2 жыл бұрын

Good comment Jackie. Live long and prosper.

@smarteranna24 2 жыл бұрын

Totally agree! This did the same for me. Love Ryan holidays work changing my life

@soryantolyan 2 жыл бұрын

The part about cherishing loved ones really got me. I spent years chasing people and fighting for one-sided relationships while ignoring those who were there for me. Now I give love where I receive it and feel much happier

@tos100returns Жыл бұрын

Remember that "loved ones" are people, too, and PEOPLE SUCK! Also, you're a people. And me. You are the "other" to every single person on the planet.

@AyushmaanMishra Жыл бұрын

@@tos100returns Wait a sec... YOURE A PEOPLE?! YOU SUCK!!!!!1!1!1!!!

@cindyrobertson3780 10 ай бұрын

@@tos100returnsI love my parents 💖

@UltimateBargains Жыл бұрын

"Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Be kind, always." -- Robin Williams

@martywilliard Жыл бұрын

AMEN! Together we can help each other through the occasional molasses experiences

@rickaguilar1833 Жыл бұрын

As a teenager, and religious, I believed everyone was honest and good! But I was surprised when I found out how people are mean and lie!

@maureendoyle6632 Жыл бұрын

Sadly especially in the church. Patriarchy

@yoonahkang7384 Жыл бұрын

That is called growing up 😅

@SkyHammackDrones Жыл бұрын

@@maureendoyle6632 is patriarchy your signature?

@waqstar7067 Жыл бұрын

Yes I still feel this way. Can't really grasp it.

@joanndeck4315 Жыл бұрын

@@yoonahkang7384 it’s a “realization” rather than “growing up” I’d say it’s more like “growing down”😅. Some of us are born with THAT MUCH inherent “goodness”….high MORALS and VALUES that it is difficult for others whose standards are not that high….to understand. This causes cognitive dissonance in the person with high morals once the realization sets in. It’s too bad that we are outnumbered in this world. It’s also too bad that a lack of morals is seen as the “standard” and those of us with inherent good qualities are seen as naive. Backwards thinking for sure…but all too common in the population 😊

@IM-uh5tk 2 жыл бұрын

1. Care less about people's opinions. 2. Be honest. 3. Don't things personally. 4. Be patient. 5. Be an example. 6. Tune out the haters. 7. Be full of love. 8. Stop comparing yourself to others. 9. Cherish your loves ones.

@123jmccoy Жыл бұрын

Thanks. I really don't like this guy's presentation style with all the pointing. But good to get the summary.

@cristinaevans139 Жыл бұрын

Thanks 🙏 for the notes ,I have brain fog and it makes it hard to write notes ❤thank you 😊

@mychicksrthick Жыл бұрын

Being honest has screwed me over w all my jobs.

@luciantudor1527 Жыл бұрын

*3. Take

@sstolarik Жыл бұрын

Thanks for the list. Much appreciated.

@Soapandwater6 2 жыл бұрын

Ryan, I love how you get down to business and start your video right away instead of wasting time doing banal introductions and trite greetings, etc. All of your strategies are useful and spot on. For those people who are feeling unloved, remember there are 2 ways to feel love. One is to receive it, the other is to give it away. It's true. You feel it when you give it away.

@JDLambright 2 жыл бұрын

"Enough will never be enough for the person who thinks enough is too little." Wow. This gives a lot of perspective on our society today. So many people are focused on gaining wealth that they don't appreciate the riches they already have. Great video!

@angusmorrison9433 Жыл бұрын

The old “he who dies with the most toys wins” scam. Same as believing “greed is good” (they can’t think for themselves and believed a movie script). A lot of rich people buy into sh*t like that.

@DSAK55 10 ай бұрын

Too Much Is Not Enough

@sarahdunn2680 Жыл бұрын

My elderly friend told me to treat everyone as a cheat and a liar and and I thought this was a terrible way at looking at life .You won’t be disappointed but on the odd occasion you’ll find a real jewel like I did with her .

@bill7853 Жыл бұрын

So you took her advice and ignored what she said I presume ?😉

@justdev8965 Жыл бұрын

@@bill7853 🤣 LMAO everyone is a guru today. Love your response, made me laugh

@mic2349 3 ай бұрын

Well this works if you want to stay safe, but it comes at a cost. Like most of life there is a trade off for everything we do.

@lightgiver7311 2 жыл бұрын

Thoreau expressed the same thought by saying, “To be a philosopher is not merely to have subtle thoughts, nor even to found a school … it is to solve some of the problems of life, not only theoretically, but practically.”

@tenzinryanlee9782 2 жыл бұрын

I really it, much appreciate and thank you 🖖

@67NewEngland 2 жыл бұрын

Thoreau was a great mind. So many nuggets in his writing. Simplify!

@bnsgokugreat Жыл бұрын

Wow

@barbarajoyce4737 Жыл бұрын

I can’t help but wonder when Henry David Thoreau write this if he was thinking of his contemporary, Bronson Alcott, the father of Louisa May Alcott. 🤔

@Drpermer 2 жыл бұрын

Actually, the best philosophy to dealing with people I received by working with radionuclides. There are three basic safety strategies with radioactive materials, 1) time, 2) distance, and 3) shielding. More specifically, minimize the amount of time you spend with people, when you must spend time with people, maximize your distance away from others, and where possible, use physical and emotional shields when near people.

@vladkagreen1824 Жыл бұрын

LOL I love it!! Treating people like radioactive material!

@mammajamma4397 Жыл бұрын

Love this

@JamesAlexander14 Жыл бұрын

Or you could simply just accept people for whom they are and just move on🙏

@Drpermer Жыл бұрын

@@JamesAlexander14 Accept, no; move on from them, yup

@trophyscene5015 Жыл бұрын

@@vladkagreen1824 they really are though. When stupid people are around me, I feel like I'm infected with something and Must Escape asap lol

@lexiemaep7930 2 жыл бұрын

I have spent 39 years being a good person. Giving to ungrateful people, always helping others, always trying to be the best me I could be. After being stolen from by people I gave things to has basically broken the camel's back. I'm done. People suck. Tired of the lying, stealing, cheating. I am done with people

@reesedaniel5835 Жыл бұрын

Same here.

@AGENTARMES Жыл бұрын

He didn’t say to be a door mat. He says lower your expectations of others

@lexiemaep7930 Жыл бұрын

@@AGENTARMES I wasn't being a doormat. I like helping people. But the last two people I helped stole from me right after I helped them so I cut them off completely. I only have 1 expectation when I give, that the person won't steal more right after and even that was asking too much.

@justdev8965 Жыл бұрын

@@lexiemaep7930 get a non human friend. They put even the best human to shame. cat, dog, lamb, koala doesn't matter... they'll show gratitude

@lindachristianson196 11 ай бұрын

I always had good jobs and chose not to have children. By nature, I’m generous. I have given thousands and thousands of dollars to my siblings and their children. Now, all these years later, I’m a senior with no one in my family who cares if I live or die. Recently I find myself googling KZfaq videos about loneliness and forgiveness. Thank God I have God.

@sideswiped6874 2 жыл бұрын

it took me 50 years to understand that the family I was born into is the worst people in my life (every day was just another day with them. that is why I put-up with them so long!!). you go into a marriage knowing and understanding that it just may fail. but you don't go around thinking that the family you were born into would come to be the worst people in your life. it's been 6 years and it's getting easer for me. yes it still hurts at times. they have lost what I had for them. and they have no insight to understand what they have lost. I looked up-to my mother, father and brother for 50 years. not anymore. they have lost what I had for them.

@reesedaniel5835 Жыл бұрын

Same here. We are the Family Scapegoats. They exchange us (the Truth) for a bowl of earthly pottage (our portion of the family inheritance).

@v.m.8472 Жыл бұрын

@@reesedaniel5835 same

@mychicksrthick Жыл бұрын

What did they do to you or what happened details plz?

@LawNerd23 Жыл бұрын

You pity them because you understand now that their life was better with you in it? That's very egotistical of you to say. Maybe you ought to rethink that. Based on that comment alone, maybe they are doing just fine without you.

@Wassenhoven420 Жыл бұрын

@@LawNerd23 You sound like his crazy Mother. You cannot assume someone is better off without family because of one sentence. I can see that you are not that smart.

@Falconlibrary Жыл бұрын

I've gravitated towards Stoicism because it seems the philosophy with the most "real world" applicability. I have terrible neighbors whose bad behavior used to distress me greatly. I expected them to behave as, well, neighbors. They no longer disturb me because of my Stoic response. I do not let them steal my peace of mind from me, and I've noticed an uplift in my daily mood as a result. I was letting them control me and now I am my own master. It was not their actions but my response to their actions that was the source of my difficulty; I cannot control them, but I can control myself. And for that revelation, I can thank a nearly two thousand year old philosophy practiced by one of the great Roman emperors.

@cyn7842 10 ай бұрын

And also, I hope you own a gun.. Negligent neighbors 😑😒 Suck.!👎

@strangemagic4704 Жыл бұрын

You're right about the fact that sometimes nothing is ever enough for other people and I've come to realize, sometimes it's just time to walk away.

@onisgagan2481 2 жыл бұрын

I don’t know if this message found me, or I found it, either way I feel like a pauper who just found a pot of gold… Thank you Ryan.

@YOUROLDFRIEND666 Жыл бұрын

When people say or do negative things to me it makes me feel glad that I can see who they are; and I feel even better to know I'm not like them.

@2tallnegrito7cmn55 2 жыл бұрын

Do not know who you are, but you have no idea how happy I found this video.

@amit.paul.10 2 жыл бұрын

Thanks for saying what I wanted to say 😊👍

@kesplays9929 2 жыл бұрын

Thanks from me too 😁

@langwell21 2 жыл бұрын

His name is Ryan Holiday. He has published quite a few Books. I’m listening to one now. I recently just found out about him too

@stevefowler6943 2 жыл бұрын

Ya, I thoroughly enjoy all of his stuff. He's got a few books and some kickass interviews with guys like Tom Bilyeu that are great as well

@deltatango6793 2 жыл бұрын

Buy his books. I love his audiobooks. Hearing him deliver these messages is amazing and inspiring. Motivating. Supporting. All that you need.

@taabishkhanself-improvemen7331 2 жыл бұрын

*”Making a big life change is pretty scary. But, you know what’s even scarier? Regret.”* Love from a small KZfaqr💙

@yehudimcewan5167 2 жыл бұрын

How can regret bring fear as fear is about something that might happen and not what didn't happen?

@nickp3949 2 жыл бұрын

As an empath, it just sucks for me because a negative person or a person that I don’t get along with…it really takes a lot out of me. It could put my head in an extremely negative space. I can’t change how it makes me feel. I can change how I think about it, but how it makes me feel from within, whether it bothers me at my core or not…I can’t change that.

@voidson9483 Жыл бұрын

Youre not an empath, you just have emotions and we aren’t in control of our emotions. we are in control of how you react to those emotions.

@99guspuppet8 Жыл бұрын

@@voidson9483 …. ❤❤❤ …. Let’s all go to Sugar rock Candy Mountain

@Prosecute-fauci Жыл бұрын

@@voidson9483 yep. The folks who call themselves “empaths” are just admitting that they have no control over themselves when they feel an emotion. I’m pretty sure it’s a prefrontal cortex issue. No impulse control.

@cincin4515 Жыл бұрын

Translation. Empath = drama queen.

@RK-bj8ho Жыл бұрын

People who claim to be empaths are usually narcissist

@elsiemarina2572 2 жыл бұрын

"When have I done that?" Exactly the question I ask myself when I watch how my adult children are behaving now. I understand they are dealing with pain and still growing up. You cannot put an old head on young shoulders but you can be patient and help them.

@Slayer2000 2 жыл бұрын

Eventually you have to let them fall, or they'll never learn to grow on their own and always be dependent on you.

@Michaelhateshandles 2 жыл бұрын

Well said indeed. Excellent perspective!

@tos100returns Жыл бұрын

I have given some things thought, especially in current times. I've thought about it. Nope. I never worshipped a celebrity who got me so angry that I tried to overthrow the United States government in an armed in surrection. No, I haven't done that.

@elizabethbarnes3969 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you Ryan. I look forward to these videos very much. I began the “Stoic Path” after reading Sharon Labell’s The Art of Living. It is dog eared and well lived. Now, I have your talks, so well thought out, as a daily companion on my journey. Incidentally, I’m 79+ and will never stop learning more about living the life I intend. It’s never too late to begin anew.

@heavymeddle28 2 жыл бұрын

The positive thing about getting older, I'm 50 now, is that the faster the years go by the less I give a dang what people think of me. I'm not here to impress anyone else than my old doberman. You just realise that everyone won't love you no matter how hard you try. In fact i love the ones that don't try to be someone they're not 😊

@marcusjones2382 2 жыл бұрын

well said

@heavymeddle28 2 жыл бұрын

@@marcusjones2382 thank you 😊 That is how I honestly feel and wish I had felt as younger too

@marcusjones2382 2 жыл бұрын

@@heavymeddle28 I'm half your age. any advice?

@heavymeddle28 2 жыл бұрын

@@marcusjones2382 hehehe, the only thing I can think of is that you're always gonna be 25. Just that one day you realise that the mirror doesn't agree with you on that anymore. And if I could get one more life and do things differently, it would be to take care of my family and loved ones more. And I wouldn't touch drugs. Those are my two things that I'd like to have done differently 😊

@marcusjones2382 2 жыл бұрын

@@heavymeddle28 thanks

@KidFresh71 Жыл бұрын

"If you want to feel good, do good. If you want to receive love, put love out into the world." Such sage advice!

@justdev8965 Жыл бұрын

Life experience shows us that, on the contrary, when you do good, you receive the worst. So whoever you heard that from was either talking out of their ass, or doesn't have enough life experience to give advice.

@gzoechi 9 ай бұрын

It probably depends on the reason why you do good. If doing good feels good it's OK. If you do good because you expect a positive reaction from the environment, you are doomed.

@j4513 Жыл бұрын

Something I tell myself when faced with rudeness: only unhappy people are rude to others. Then I think - well how unfortunate they are so unhappy in their own lives. Those who truly have happiness and contentment in their lives - it’s a natural extension of themselves to treat others with kindness.

@aicerg Жыл бұрын

Maybe all rude people are unhappy, but not all unhappy people are rude.

@justdev8965 Жыл бұрын

Profound stupidity in this statement. Many "happy" people are self absorbed and the absolute worst piece of garbage you can meet. It has got nothing to do with happiness.

@abdonassar2180 2 жыл бұрын

these are 9 tips not 8 1 - 00:58 Care Less About People's Opinion 2 - 01:55 Be Honest 3- 02:27 Don't Take Things Personally 4- 03:19 Be Patient 5- 4:15 Be An Example 6 - 4:52 Tune Out The Haters 7 - 05:53 Be Full OF Love 8 - 06:47 Stop Comparing Yourself To Others 9 - 07:46 Cherish Your Loved Ones

@orsie200 Жыл бұрын

abdo nassar, I love when commenters do this. Thank you.

@tiredofallthis7716 Жыл бұрын

Yeah, user cliff notes are great. These ideas or life hacks didn’t begin with Marcus Aurelius, though I take nothing away from him for his realization of truth.

@andrewhunter9119 Жыл бұрын

#10 - stop correcting ppl when they misnumber their youtube videos bahahaha jk

@monicaramirez51015 Жыл бұрын

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤yes❤

@Aleyah Жыл бұрын

Thank you!

@pac2840 2 жыл бұрын

I'm the 2nd of 12 kids, only 13 years and no twins, little space between us. I remember being in 3rd grade and feeling jealous that my older sister was a much better students. Then I looked around and noticed if I was going to compare myself to my siblings, it would be exhausting and a losing game. One of them was probably going to be better than me at pretty much everything. Better to stay focused on myself and not worry about what they were doing. I only needed to be me. A very freeing moment that has stood me well.

@TonyRedunzo 2 жыл бұрын

You got me in the first 5 seconds with "people suck...." Finally a youtube philosopher who doesn't sugarcoat! Exploring stoicism and the teachings of Marcus Aurelius has made me realize I've always been a stoic. If I could just stop being annoyed when people who I don't like and respect don't like and respect me. How ironic. Liked and subbed

@SS-gx7tg 2 жыл бұрын

lol stoicism. Keep bottling up your true nature and drowning your emotions, gents. Eventually that cork will pop and everything you've bottled up will explode. You're gonna hate the result.

@TonyRedunzo 2 жыл бұрын

@@SS-gx7tg You actually make a good point. Suppression and aversion can make for sleepless nights and existential crises. There's more I don't know about stoicism than i do but I learned from buddhist philosophy that a person should not deny feelings and monkey mind thoughts. Let them arise and pass. Don't become ATTACHED to anything. What is "true nature" People define it differently. I've been trying to find my true nature for many years and I can't find anything.

@anntrope491 2 жыл бұрын

The PARADOX OF HUMAN RELATIONS...EXPECTING SOMETHING FROM OTHERS...WE DON'T OFFER THEM...

@anntrope491 2 жыл бұрын

@@TonyRedunzo BE like the willow...flexible, resilient, not rigid like the oak...

@TonyRedunzo 2 жыл бұрын

@@anntrope491 “The green reed which bends in the wind is stronger than the mighty oak which breaks in a storm.” ― Confucius

@daevable 2 жыл бұрын

I needed to hear about this kind of advice and lifestyle. Right now I’m full of anger, disappointment and I don't want to continue like this because I know I'm hurting myself. It is difficult to accept that someone from your own family makes you go through so many problems, fights among many other things. I understand that we have to forgive, turn the page but it is very difficult for me to do that. On the other hand I am filling myself with hatred and I am very clear that this is not right.

@justdev8965 Жыл бұрын

It's so messed up. The very people claiming to care for you place the biggest hurdles to your success and what's worst, they stab the sharpest daggers to your emotional well-being. Much love for people like you. Probably because I can relate.

@DKR-1881 11 ай бұрын

I hear you.

@Rachel-jh2mx 8 ай бұрын

Hope you’re in a better place nowadays.

@daevable 8 ай бұрын

@@Rachel-jh2mx Getting there :)

@chrishouston1708 2 жыл бұрын

One of Ryan’s best videos yet. They keep getting better and better. I love waking up and watching these to get my day started. Thank you Ryan!

@PlazaMoon 2 жыл бұрын

I'm assuming your day is just great after watching this.

@Greg_Chase 2 жыл бұрын

Important thing to remember: Everyone is a shambone. That includes me and you. All part of the shambone circus. That means no one has any leverage over you. Only bluffing. "I'll bust out some impressive jargon and rumors of personal success to blow them away." Nope. You have no leverage over anyone. Do you want to be real or a laughing stock when you leave the room? _Choose now_ .

@ashcam1791 2 жыл бұрын

Same here. Totally a great way to start the day. Cheers my friend (*lifting morning cup of coffee in your direction).

@18Bees 2 жыл бұрын

Love the opening “People suck…” But we don’t have to. Tnx for posting today.

@pits7035 2 жыл бұрын

@@sfjlfkjsdlfkjds and you don't care bout that, neither do they ahahaha it goes on

@hermesnoelthefourthway 2 жыл бұрын

Nothing succeeds like a budgerigar

@tos100returns Жыл бұрын

But WE are people, and you are an "other" to everyone on the entire planet.

@tos100returns Жыл бұрын

@@hermesnoelthefourthway They're a tasty snack. I like the yellow ones.

@swampdogdiggity Жыл бұрын

It feels so good to hear someone else say people suck and give all the reasons why. Brutal truth.

@samfrito 3 ай бұрын

You remind me of things my mom said to me 50 years ago. Grateful for your wisdom and grateful her wisdom allowed me to make 50 more years.

@das9636 2 жыл бұрын

As a misanthropic stoic, I find this video immensely helpful! People are everywhere, and they SUCK

@junkjunk2493 2 жыл бұрын

misanthropic ??? you wanna hugg ? ha , made my day , thx

@user-mg9en3gb9n Жыл бұрын

if it's only thing you have understand from the video it's sad

@tos100returns Жыл бұрын

Back in 1983, when I was 18, my college roommate invited me to drink beers at his brother's house. His brother was a 40-year-old Marine. When I asked him if he was married, he first gave me a lecture about how he owned EVERYTHING in the house, including the house, outright. No mortgages or loans. Then he looked me in the eye and he told me something that I will never forget. "People are pieces of shit and they deserve to be obliterated." I'm not in the business of obliteration. But the first half, totally. And Stoicism confirmed that ALL humans are pieces of shit. It would be foolish to look in the mirror and determine one's own self to be the exception.

@user-mg9en3gb9n Жыл бұрын

@@tos100returnssorry for you pal

@rubixlx0 2 жыл бұрын

“When you wake up in the morning, tell yourself: the people I deal with today will be meddling, ungrateful, arrogant, dishonest, jealous, and surly. They are like this because they can’t tell good from evil”

@Dancing_Alone_wRentals 2 жыл бұрын

And that is just where I live.

@mikewallis2987 2 жыл бұрын

But why can't they?

@jimhardiman3836 2 жыл бұрын

And you can?

@paulbolton2322 2 жыл бұрын

Been on my fridge 5 years! & I view it every day &, it will remain true long after I'm gone. 👍👌

@bathcat3759 2 жыл бұрын

“But I have seen good and I have seen evil…”

@janesmith8050 2 жыл бұрын

People are also Brave and Generous and Selfless and Compassionate and Thoughtful and Kind and Honest and Committed and Loyal and Protective and more.

@RebeccaLynnMusic Жыл бұрын

It is such a challenge to practice some of these stoic tenets as a compassionate, empathetic, and sensitive person. I'm very grateful for this channel.

@justdev8965 Жыл бұрын

If it's a challenge, then maybe it's high time we realized and accepted that we aren't what we want to be. It's supposed to come naturally, not feeling forced. We are the most savage animal.

@goodie7557 2 жыл бұрын

I am one of those people who suck at times. I am working to be more aware of my thoughts and behaviors in difficult situations. I wish I could love myself more. I’m working on it. Ryan is a huge help!

@terkelalgevind529 2 жыл бұрын

I wish the gynocrntric order never was, most of todays problems Lies in fatherless homes and ofx that means zero stoicism learned in the most important of years, the forming years..

@BetwixtDandD Жыл бұрын

We ALL suck at times. But if you are honest about it and try to suck less and less often, you are better than most.

@ryoung3837 2 жыл бұрын

Thanks Ryan, I watched your video a few times, ruminating on the situation I find myself in with poor mental health and challenges at work seeming beyond my control. This video resonated with me and forced my to concentrate on me, doing my best and appreciating my family. Maybe today, I give myself and other people a break. 42 year old dude nearly in tears now. Please keep up the good work, what you do is important to our community.

@68M35A2 Жыл бұрын

You hang in there bro, I’ll cry with you.

@cameronmckay3504 Жыл бұрын

Stocism is something I've practiced for years without having a language to describe my philosophy until now. I read meditations and it hit home so perfectly. To be expected, most writings about stoicism have been chunky at best and this channel has been great to refresh, clarify and chew thoughts. Thank you for the channel and content

@mapleext 9 ай бұрын

This makes me think about triggers, which I have been trying to more deeply understand and accept. When I feel overwhelmed with anger or hurt by a loved one, it helps me to think about and acknowledge the original hurt that was triggered by this person in the present. The person who triggered me was pretty much acting like an everyday imperfect person like myself. I can relate to that and eventually come back to a place of peace and neutrality about that person. I will always feel some measure if pain about original pain or trauma - we all do. But I can also work on separating that from day to day interactions with others. I really also really appreciate the advice to concentrate on my own love and appreciation of things and others and not stewing about all the stupidity and evil I see in the world. It will never be even close to perfect. I must do my personal best to put out positive energy. Like Mr. Rodgers’ mom told him - look for the helpers in the world. Now, can I live all this?

@outthewaydre6450 2 жыл бұрын

This man literally give a full lesson on how to deal with people..... wow life is priceless.....great video...

@Galaxyofbrian 2 жыл бұрын

Ry thank you from UK 🇬🇧 for breaking down stoicism into everyday easily understandable practical advice. You are a God send. 🤘💯

@theresebrandser Жыл бұрын

Thank you. I had an incident recently where a friend said something hurtful/gossip about me. I thought about the times I behaved the same, and came to the realization that I behaved that way in hopes of making friends or fitting in. It’s easier to forgive someone when you can see yourself in them. Your video helped me see that. ❤️

@ChochiLuko 2 жыл бұрын

My pet peeve has been people being snoopy or sticking their nose in other people's business.Why do we care so much about what's going on in someone's else life?

@pepper1188 Жыл бұрын

Truth, made worse with the stay at home workers, sitting in front of a screen in one's pajamas limits perspective

@MichaelNealeYT 2 жыл бұрын

It's a long road but I'm learning to care less about other people's opinions of me and my work

@Dancing_Alone_wRentals 2 жыл бұрын

I think you did a good job,.

@MichaelNealeYT 2 жыл бұрын

@@Dancing_Alone_wRentals I appreciate that, thank you

@tsb7911 2 жыл бұрын

KZfaq recommended this guy to me. He's great! As Bob Dylan would say, "right on target, so direct." Guys like Holiday are far better than a therapist. The therapist dwells on YOU. Ironically, that's the trouble in the first place, people think their problems are just them; they're not. Books and videos are also cheaper than a therapist. )

@harrisonaic 7 ай бұрын

Gentleness, empathy and emotional detachment are unbreakable and helpful strategies when dealing with people.

@thetechguy3993 Жыл бұрын

I'm so happy that there are still man like who is trying to give people meaning to their life . Love you man for the work you are doing you have help me a lot 🖤

@reginasemenenko148 2 жыл бұрын

Ryan, I'm so glad you have popped up in my youtube feed. I studied Stoicism in a philosophy course many years ago and was intrigued. I found your youtube channel during the pandemic and it has changed my life! I've been listening to you very often and reading Marcus Aurelius as well as Epictetus and others Stoic philosophers. I'm so glad that I'm beginning to learn how to be unbothered. I am at the beginning of my journey and I have much more to learn, but it's so nice to be able to enjoy the journey more and not just the destination! I've been working on being content rather than being happy as contentment is realistic and happiness is fleeting. I am so thankful to you for introducing me to this wonderful philosophy and way of life.

@teddymills1 2 жыл бұрын

The Stoics would be happy knowing Ryan is continuing their messages.

@sampetrie340 2 жыл бұрын

Would a Stoic care what other people think of them?

@B3rrymon 2 жыл бұрын

@@sampetrie340 You're not wrong but what I believe Jack meant is a teachers pride that their teachings and profound thoughts have been passed to a new generation upholding them. Bless you, Ryan!

@sampetrie340 2 жыл бұрын

@@B3rrymon and I don’t begrudge them that. Philosophers are human too.

@WoodysAR Жыл бұрын

This is an elegant clearly, self-evidently true philosophy.

@LLS710 5 ай бұрын

This guy is great. I may not be a stoic but there's something about the happy tempo and upbeat nature of this charismatic individual. You feel like you are meeting a real person. He reminds me of the Context is Everything guy.

@aurorealis3249 2 жыл бұрын

Excellent blueprint for life. As one who has studied psychology and counseled those who are on the brink of suicide, despair and loneliness - the Stoics have been time-tested and critically relevant today more than ever. Thank you for this clear and applicable philosophy in a concise video presentation. I apply the teachings of Stoicism everyday - it has made a world of difference!

@BobBob-uv9fq 2 жыл бұрын

Just ignore them, “the more I learn about people ,the more I like my cat” bob bob 9/8 2020

@StoicEvolution1 6 ай бұрын

Seneca: "Most powerful is he who has himself in his own power."

@TheHuntercamper 2 жыл бұрын

I live in a remote settings as a child. I learned how to be by my self. So I have learned very early on to step out of the social programing that is taught to you in and through so called educational systems. Vast majority of the time I use the language of silence with people. When we are living in the era of communication silence thoroughly confuses people especially with people who try to control you with shamming techniques. There is no stronger response. At best they will walk away from you when they can't label you. Why? Because silence wins every battle and war know one knows anything about.

@seandunn2732 2 жыл бұрын

Ryan, your videos are so inspiring that they almost bring me to tears. I've become a better person since I discovered your books and your channel . Thank you, you are my mentor from a far. Sincerely, Sean Dunn

@jimhiggins5404 Жыл бұрын

Thank you for deepening my understanding and appreciation of stoicism. It is dawning on me how intelligent my father was and understand the lessons he was teaching me by example everyday. One of my favorites is to remember that “people will disappoint you”. Once you understand that simple concept life becomes much easier. The other is that there is absolutely no such thing as the word “fair”. Everyone has their own gifts and limitations. Embrace your strengths and work consistently on your limitations.

@Me97202 9 ай бұрын

I don’t really like most people, but I still approach them with kindness, empathy, compassion. But I usually end up regretting it. The more “terrific” I am, the more they seem to want from me.

@babaji1947 2 жыл бұрын

The best way to deal with people is to avoid them as much as possible.

@mosfet500 2 жыл бұрын

I don't think that's true. There's a proverb about a monk who was constantly fighting with everyone in the village so he decides to go into the mountains and meditate. After years of meditating he thinks he's ready to return to society. On his way down the mountain he passes a peasant with a donkey and the donkey is kicking up all kinds of dust. The monk starts yelling at the peasant, so nothing has changed. The moral of the story is that you must be in society, learn in society, you can not remove yourself and expect to learn to be well.

@pickle2144 2 жыл бұрын

Nah I don't think so cause you can't outrun your problems no matter hard you try your problems will always follow you so instead of running away make correct judgements about the situation which is in front of you and trust me you will find yourself in peace You won't find a stoic in Himalayas meditating in peace you'll find a stoic in busy market equally at peace as the man meditating it's all about how you make judgements and choices about the given situation

@fbi6423 2 жыл бұрын

@@pickle2144 this

@imjohnny08musicstation93 2 жыл бұрын

Angry people and shouting people is the best to practice control our emotion..sometimes I win sometimes i shout also not perfect yet.

@cincin4515 Жыл бұрын

Absolutely avoid them. Their vileness may rub off on you.

@SC-fk9nc 2 жыл бұрын

Thx Ryan, this video reminds me of not becoming a grumpy old man which is a challenge sometimes.

@Shanksterfaraibless 2 жыл бұрын

I agree, definitely one of the best videos thus far. Thanks for this, I can’t thank you enough for opening my eyes to stoicism, it’s changed the last two years of my life. Your books, courses and virtual mentorship has been life altering. Thanks. Sarangan from Toronto

@MER7 2 жыл бұрын

I love that you mentioned The Beatles! Stoicism “all you need is love”.

@diabolesson 11 ай бұрын

Many people attack each other online without restraint, do not put themselves in the other people's position and only see black or white solutions. If they took the values in this video to heart just a little bit, it would solve so many problems in the world. Thank you for this content Ryan🙏🏼

@etripp111 2 жыл бұрын

This is your best video so far. Thank you for all you do; you're making a difference in the world.

@horaciocapanelli-soto4710 2 жыл бұрын

I needed to hear and to be reminded of all this today. It can be very disappointing when something someone did with all their hearts it’s not appreciated.

@reesedaniel5835 Жыл бұрын

Now you know how Jesus Christ feels......

@ashcam1791 2 жыл бұрын

Love your videos Ryan. I've recommended them to so many friends. I hope you continue to share your work on youtube, it's greatly appreciated. It has been especially helpful during these challenging covid times.

@vincentdavis3453 2 жыл бұрын

4. Be Full Of Love and everything will fall into place. Thank you Ryan.

@tos100returns Жыл бұрын

Well, full of something.

@jennifermaguire7965 2 жыл бұрын

Love that Ryan is continuing Marcus's good work

@TheMrchuck2000 Жыл бұрын

Love that you’re on a first name basis with Marcus Aurelius.

@pierremonney5351 2 жыл бұрын

You're amazing brother! I appreciate the time you put into trying to make a change for the good in the world.

@OmLorna Жыл бұрын

Hello Daily Stoic. As if, I found you - “just in time”. I align with all that you have said, I applaud the comments left by others. Jealousy isn’t my thing, nor is attainment… I don’t need more then I already have. I do not chase shiny objects, be it things or people. I walk out the door daily and lead with LOVE. I respect those I meet and I listen with an open mind and heart. Although many and most people suck - (narcissistic, sociopathic, energy depleting vampires). Ah, I’m judging and labeling here but its a fact, we are living amongst them. This week is huge for me, I’m meeting with the case manager who oversees my case load. She is trying squash me with their opinions of how I am doing my work. She down right says, what I am doing wrong. I haven’t heard a positive thing in weeks - we’ve all been there right?? We need positive reinforcement in any partnership; a friendly kind word, a knowing smile, a shake of the hand. Compliments, when given from the heart spiral our energy upwards. I’m going to take your wisdom with me. I won’t attach, won’t spew negativity because everything as we all know is temporary….change is the the only constant is life. I with travel out there with kindness and try to see both side of everything situation presented before me.

@kalpanabalakrishnam5203 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you Ryan. I came across your book through audible recommendation! I loved it from the moment I started listening to it. Since then I also started watching your KZfaq videos. I feel the changes in me and I like it. I think there was always some elements of stoicism present in me but your books and videos have elevated that. I notice the questions I ask everyday? I started journaling as well. It’s truly life changing- thank you 🙏

@dannypresson4815 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you. I needed to hear this today and into the future. Gratitude checks depression and despair.

@axass4603 2 жыл бұрын

Jesus, these videos make me cry; I don't know why but they hit hard. Thanks, Ryan!

@AsiraBettas Жыл бұрын

Thanks, I needed that, I often think I am not worthy, I will stop those thoughts today.

@nerdfamous5794 2 жыл бұрын

I always get so amped up and ready to take on the world when I watch your videos! Thanks for the morning pep talks ,and sharing this beautiful information.

@robertonallin6736 2 жыл бұрын

Amazing video Ryan! One of yours best videos. Your spontaneous stoics insights promotes kindness. Thank you a lot!!

@rawseed2973 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you,for posting, Ryan. You are doing a great thing.I love you

@Miss_Annlaug 10 ай бұрын

I am 40 and I have to say: mu sircle has never been smaller and I am absolutely loving it. And: the biggest mistakes if my life has been putting energy and effort into people who took advantage of that and dis bot five as much. Imbalanced relationships.

@maplehouseknives Жыл бұрын

Thanks for this video, man! I had a particularly tough job interview today. I didn't get the job. I came home, and this video was in my feed. I truly appreciate you for making this video, you made the rest of my day worth looking forward to!

@grahamscott449 2 жыл бұрын

I really enjoyed this wonderful post - thoughtful and true - great teaching for everyone, but especially teens and young adults

@patrickhay2561 2 жыл бұрын

This was great, you’re a natural at this video format Ryan!

@jrromman 9 ай бұрын

Just want to tell you that I appreciate these videos very much. Learning how much of this I already practice and how much of this I need to begin practicing. Thank you.

@Protesto2012 Жыл бұрын

Excellent! Love your enthusiasm and passion! I don’t see people as good or bad anymore, I see them as a human being who is like me when unconscious we do stupid things that can be quantified as bad. We must learn to trust, not see the “bad” person but see ourselves in them and forgive and love them as we forgive ourselves and learn to love ourselves in all our human programming. Thank you Ryan! Keep going friend.

@zion367 Жыл бұрын

Love and forgive them and let them assault and abuse me some more. Great advise!

@kevinkelley4376 Жыл бұрын

Good advice. Im 44 yrs old, and live in a 20 somethings neighborhood of younger people. Lately wherever I go, people walk around me in public, or cut in front of me while Im waiting at stoplights. These aren't huge NY sidewalks, they're small neighborhood crossings. People literally step on top of mud banks then insert themselves in front of me to cross first..(?) I speak to people and they don't even look or acknowledge me. 2 nights ago I was at the corner market opening a freezer door to buy milk and a younger guy came up from behind me and said "excuse me!!" like I was in his way. I mean, I was there first. Wait your turn, it'll take 3 seconds.. Its making me feel irrelevant and outdated or like Ive been replaced by this younger generation.. I tell myself its not personal, but its messing with my head regardless.. I'll try to keep this video in mind.. *Anyone have any advice?

@m.d.b.6318 Жыл бұрын

⭐Society is crumbling faster. Good manners and respect for self/others have dwindled because people have no morals/values. Teach the young better when possible.⭐

@kevinkelley4376 Жыл бұрын

@@m.d.b.6318, wow you're right! Tks for the reply, I appreciate it. 🙂 * i actually left my neighborhood today for the night and feel so much better. Sometimes a change in scenery makes all the difference in the world..

@Shanjuran Жыл бұрын

Do what I do don't take it personal. You might have to train yourself but you will be empowered which is where you need to be.

@kevinkelley4376 Жыл бұрын

@@Shanjuran, your right, I'll work on it. Tks for the advice.

@jacquelinespratt1015 Жыл бұрын

Say excuse you?

@jedics1 Жыл бұрын

I have low expectations of people but I also don't harbour any animosity toward them because of it, we are all flawed and still learning, some us change and some of us never will. I just choose who and how much I extend myself to them and that is a real art to learn. When I get screwed by someone I know it means I still have some more learning to be a better judge of character and how I will handle a similar situation better in the future. With practise people become an easy read, especially those who operate under some very basic self serving agendas.

@jedics1 Жыл бұрын

@@francelaferriere6106 I wasn't implying that you like her, there is plenty to loathe about the various stages of maturity that some never achieve. Just like you wouldn't be angry at a 5 foot amateur athlete being bad at high jump, getting angry at amateur people is equally futile. Its also why I avoid jobs where dealing with people is a major focus :)

@j4513 Жыл бұрын

@jedics 💯 Beautifully said. Sidenote: in my experience, it’s oftentimes the people that complain the most about “how horrible other people are” that are usually pretty awful to deal with themselves. Including the ones that constantly complain about specific other people or just society at large. 🤔

@M13asan 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you for your books, daily emails and videos Ryan. Truly have changed my life and I even got a picture of Marcus Aurelius and the four virtues of stoicism tattooed on my sleeve!

@carleygrundy771 2 жыл бұрын

This was a glorious way to begin my day, thank you 🙏

@icebox_Intruder 2 жыл бұрын

"People suck!" **instantaneous reflexive like**

@angusmorrison9433 Жыл бұрын

Major beauty. I’m glad I found you. Of course, No. 8 broke my heart bc my husband (Angus) passed away unexpectedly without me having chance to tell him “I love you”. -Kathy 😢💔💕

@Blings12345 9 ай бұрын

4:40 thank you for the words of wisdom. This is very helpful and I pray we all love and care for each other.

@sunnyreads1845 2 жыл бұрын

You made my day! A good friend sent this to me moments ago without knowing I received a few calls from family and friends expressing despair at what's happening in the world. This arrived just in time, and I will be sharing it with everyone I know who will benefit from these incredible words of encouragement. Much love to you, your loved ones and this audience. Thank you! 💖

@jackpinesavage1628 2 жыл бұрын

I like to read the sermons by Albert Schweitzer, when he was living in Switzerland. He spoke about the joy found in helping others too. He spoke about the "many who drift through life, never knowing that joy". If you're a person who enjoys helping others, you're blessed.

@dabouras 2 жыл бұрын

Out of my Life and Thought was another great book by him. Its basically his autobiography. Read it years ago and still have it.

@kingleonidas4296 2 жыл бұрын

I used to be a mechanic and I always seemed to be in a situation to help others that were stranded. I Helped a trucker fix his starter, put gas in empty tanks, changed a starter on a truck in a Love’s parking lot, that sort of stuff. Over time I began to really hate individual people and felt they are no longer worth my time. The other day I helped a man get his flat tire and rim off his car. I felt afterwards that I should have just ignored him because if I hurt myself helping him, he wouldn’t care, nor would there be anything he could do if he did. Any thoughts on why I may be looking at this wrong?

@wallyworld817 Жыл бұрын

Thank you for posting and all the work that this entails. "To thy ownself be true" Operating from the position of Love is key in these otherwise confusing and fearful times!!! Be the change, it's catchy!!!

@EdenP68 Жыл бұрын

Thank you. I appreciated the whole video but the last segment really hit home. I’ve been trying to live my life differently and this has helped me renew my commitment to it. I just found your page. I’m so glad that I did.