Straight Talk: Can Kids Come Between the Perfect Match? || STEVE HARVEY

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Steve TV Show

Steve TV Show

5 жыл бұрын

If you find the perfect person but can’t get along with their kids, is that enough to end the relationship? Steve’s Straight Talk panel looks into it.
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Пікірлер: 300
@504kel7
@504kel7 2 жыл бұрын
Y’all let them kids intervene in a relationship, then the kids get old and leave the home, and now old old and alone! They don’t even come visit!! Facts 💯
@abenijones311
@abenijones311 Жыл бұрын
FACTS!
@willskywalk
@willskywalk 5 жыл бұрын
I'm a single male without kids. In my experience dating a woman with kids was the worst thing I've ever done. Sticking to women who are at my same wavelength with 0 kids
@newlife45692
@newlife45692 5 жыл бұрын
Facts and its serious business. Its so common for thirsty men to put themselves in the position to be with a woman with kids knowing good and well he can really care less about them, but so many single moms out there I guess i cant blame them
@amunraankh
@amunraankh 5 жыл бұрын
@Willy Will - Wise decision brother. And its no criticism of any woman or her children, but that type of responsibility is not to be taken lightly. As a single, and celibate man, I believe its more beneficial to find a woman on the same level, and never take on something you know you can't handle.
@LaRavenTwitty
@LaRavenTwitty 2 жыл бұрын
@@amunraankh I believe in not taking on something you can’t handle
@K13ZONGZ
@K13ZONGZ 2 жыл бұрын
Im a single woman, and it's just as hard for me to deal with my boyfriend's kids. It's been ten years, and I'm struggling and stressed most of the time. I tried to love his two boys, but they stole and lied to me. The kids don't get punishment.
@Metaljaybird007
@Metaljaybird007 2 жыл бұрын
I'm single. I should stay single...umm back in my mind I don't want to
@everetteduncan9410
@everetteduncan9410 3 жыл бұрын
I totally agree with Steve Harvey right there 1000000 percent with his perspective he's the adult he makes the decision in his life not the kids
@Slim2xzIsland
@Slim2xzIsland Жыл бұрын
He's so right man. I dated a girl once. So beautiful in the beginning like usual. Then I met her kids and all hell broke lose. Some of the most difficult children I ever encountered. Never again
@simplyameeraj
@simplyameeraj 11 күн бұрын
Smh damn
@Slim2xzIsland
@Slim2xzIsland 11 күн бұрын
@@simplyameeraj ikr
@preteelee
@preteelee 3 жыл бұрын
I just left my boyfriend because he always wants to bring his 20 yr old daughter everywhere we go… My last straw was we made plans to go places and I thought alone then his daughter got off work early and he said she was coming…. We hardly EVER did anything alone … I walked out the door. I just feel like she didn’t respect that I wanted alone time.
@Lonelyahk30
@Lonelyahk30 2 жыл бұрын
imagine that same scenario but them being 30 . Smh , right. Crazy
@elcapitan5306
@elcapitan5306 2 жыл бұрын
That meant he didn't like you that much, not gonna lie.
@mikebutler7121
@mikebutler7121 2 жыл бұрын
I left a single mom for the same thing I guess it goes both ways💯
@misscamara12
@misscamara12 2 жыл бұрын
Some men treat their older daughters as if they were their wives.
@renegademade6384
@renegademade6384 Жыл бұрын
Apparently neither did he. What a creep. Does he never want to have sex with you
@josetrumpas8536
@josetrumpas8536 2 жыл бұрын
If a woman or a man have kids and you don't, stay away !!!!! You don't neeed all that stress
@unleashingpotential-psycho9433
@unleashingpotential-psycho9433 5 жыл бұрын
I think kids can definitely block a beautiful relationship 💀
@Super19900991
@Super19900991 5 жыл бұрын
Beautiful relationship blocked when a woman picks the wrong man and has his child
@snowbird1381
@snowbird1381 4 жыл бұрын
Jamie Reyes agreed, but if the relationship is there to stay, maybe show those kids that you’re a safe person to go to when needed. Developing a form of trust with them will help in the long run.
@lol.3460
@lol.3460 3 жыл бұрын
I think it depends on the age. When we were younger we were demons. My parents couldn’t bring anyone around us
@50centricher9
@50centricher9 3 жыл бұрын
You're all narcissists ... So what if "the perfect match" in one's mind is a brand new emotionally abusive manipulator who would try to *unfairly compete* with and hold the children's potential back (because they already have a how many year advantage in life, meanwhile the nurturing and needed attention for the children will lessen, and the new spouse could never have love for children that's not theirs) by being in the way and literally manipulating the parent away from their parental responsibilities to cater to *them.* Where the one being abused benefits from the abuser's resources, the abuser benefits from their ego being stroke and the *children* ("kids" are baby goats...) take the shorthand of the stick because they literally become unimportant to their parent now since their parent is getting showered with materials and being bought/manipulated *away* from them, *willingly.* At that point you SHOULDNT BE PARENTS. Anyone who puts their self and their *new* partner over life they created on this world is not just selfish, but evil narcissists who need their karma
@austind4301
@austind4301 3 жыл бұрын
@@50centricher9 very true. But then, single parents shouldn’t be dating, period. Just as it’s wrong to not put the children first, it’s wrong to be in a one sided and abusive relationship in which only the single parent benefits. I’m a firm believer that if you REALLY want to put your kids first, you’ll stay single until the day you die.
@shanequenzer871
@shanequenzer871 Жыл бұрын
Just broke up with my girlfriend of a year. She’s the only woman I’ve ever loved and I’m about to turn 30. There is no discipline to her children. I just got back from ending things face to face. I tried to talk to her children and gain respect, but going to restaurants, family gatherings, anything, they just wouldn’t cooperate. I’m not a man who’s ever had children and never respected a boyfriend who even thought of punishing them. I tried as much as I could and I’ll always love her, but honestly the kids ruined it for me. I won’t be doing it again. Love you all, God Bless
@abenijones311
@abenijones311 Жыл бұрын
I understand what you dealt with. Some people can't understand that children will definitely and intentionally ruin a relationship they don't approve of.
@Exquisitely-A
@Exquisitely-A Жыл бұрын
I agree. I'm single with no kids if you're looking lol 😅
@BigKissez
@BigKissez 11 ай бұрын
Same here!
@babou5694
@babou5694 5 жыл бұрын
I won't date a guy with kids especially if I don't have one.
@mikebutler7121
@mikebutler7121 2 жыл бұрын
👏
@moonbabyhealing
@moonbabyhealing 3 жыл бұрын
Yes 100% kids can ruin the relationship even if you are highly compatible and madly in love with your partner
@mikebutler7121
@mikebutler7121 2 жыл бұрын
💯I been there
@ronburgundy8941
@ronburgundy8941 2 жыл бұрын
Especially if the other child’s parent just makes life horrible
@humilis42
@humilis42 Жыл бұрын
Even if you both are the parents of that child. My daughter has no relationship with me at all because her dad worships the ground she walks on and treats me like I’m his daughter. She is a horrible spoiled brat and I am the only disciplinarian in this house which is the main reason why we have this problem. She’s disrespectful towards me which I call her out on and he just watches on like it’s nothing. He has never had my back when it comes to her. Not even when she was little. I say no, he says yes to her. It has always been this way and now she is older. If I knew then what I know now……I would have never had a child by him. I’m sorry, I know it sounds bad but I am miserable in this house with these two. I argue until I’m blue in the face and they walk around here like nothing is wrong.
@renegademade6384
@renegademade6384 Жыл бұрын
Especially if the women you are dating spoils her son so much he is a rude brat
@renegademade6384
@renegademade6384 Жыл бұрын
@@humilis42 you need to leave even if its just for a couple weeks. Theu will never stop. You are the punching bag
@mmfogar
@mmfogar 5 жыл бұрын
Never let your child become your parent. It ruins the relationship.
@Jay-jb2vr
@Jay-jb2vr 5 жыл бұрын
Never neglect your child, never shut them out
@renegademade6384
@renegademade6384 Жыл бұрын
@@Jay-jb2vr what there is an in between spoiling the crap out of your kid and letting them run your life and cutting them out
@abenijones311
@abenijones311 Жыл бұрын
Whew!
@LibraLife47
@LibraLife47 5 жыл бұрын
It all depends on the situation there are no blanket statements..some will some wont
@chicosworld
@chicosworld 5 жыл бұрын
Children can most definitely come between a relationship thats why i prefer women with no children or at least grown out the house children who have their own lives💯
@willskywalk
@willskywalk 5 жыл бұрын
Facts. Yall start a family together. None of this premade crap
@ramonaharris920
@ramonaharris920 2 жыл бұрын
The bad part is so many grown children are moving back home, with their parents & bringing their kids with them.
@misscamara12
@misscamara12 2 жыл бұрын
Some grown children can cause trouble too and move back home.
@kalanabi_
@kalanabi_ 5 жыл бұрын
Man ! I can legit listen to Steve all freakin day! Like fr fr!
@MichelePearl
@MichelePearl 5 жыл бұрын
Katarina I think I do. lol
@Howtonaturally
@Howtonaturally 5 жыл бұрын
I don't understand why some of you think children know what a good relationship is? Yes sometimes they have good intuition but also they are children! Naivety is common place. You think you're new "bae" is the only thing they're not gonna like in their life at first? Don't just end a good relationship because you think everything has to line up and be picture perfect, give it time if they are sceptical at first. Explore their feelings and talk about it together first.
@Howtonaturally
@Howtonaturally 5 жыл бұрын
@@TWMWFT So your child can dislike someone without good reason indefinitely and they will still come first? How about teach your child some things about life instead of pandering to their illogical feelings? So your child can not like someone a year down the road without any good reason and that's fine? Is that what you're saying?
@Jay-jb2vr
@Jay-jb2vr 5 жыл бұрын
@@Howtonaturally I can tell your children will have a very difficult childhood
@Howtonaturally
@Howtonaturally 5 жыл бұрын
@@TWMWFT I hear you. I'm sorry for how things turned out with your father. Don't apologise for the long comment, I read it all. I thought about it and I learned something. Peace and love.
@Lonelyahk30
@Lonelyahk30 2 жыл бұрын
You a fool
@2centsfreelancer
@2centsfreelancer 5 жыл бұрын
I just think parents give they kids too much power. My dad didn’t even tell me he was getting until the day of 🤷🏾‍♀️. Unless the person is hurting the child in some kind of manner. Make it work and be happy.
@luisanacalderon9064
@luisanacalderon9064 19 күн бұрын
Exactly!!! Kids are kids and they shouldn’t be on charge of anything!!!
@mikebutler7121
@mikebutler7121 3 жыл бұрын
With all do respect kids will brake up relationships IF THE PARENT LET THEM.WE ALL NO HOW ARE KIDS ARE ITS UP TO US TO TEACH THEM SIMPLE.
@esraamahagna9882
@esraamahagna9882 3 жыл бұрын
as long as the person you're with is not harming these kids , go live your life , cause one day the kids will grow , leave you , and go live thier lives too .kids dont understand how life is hard and complicated for grown ups , they just want everything on aplate of gold while they cant keep their clothes clean . a kid cant make a decision for grown up assssss people . PERIOD
@esraamahagna9882
@esraamahagna9882 3 жыл бұрын
@Christian Babis depends on how you choose ur spouse :) . I was talking about real Love , the one you can't be mentally , physically healthy and happy without , the spouse who loves us . No matter fact kids grow and go , and a good spouse stays :)
@idontwelcomeothermenaround6711
@idontwelcomeothermenaround6711 2 жыл бұрын
@@esraamahagna9882 A random men have no rights in my family and around my mother, if something, f him and he can go back to his family. My mother is not some other man's property. Kids don't leave, they also come back with grandkids but i won't show my kids to my mother, if she bring another abomination around her. My hapiness isn't important to my mother? She should only make another man happy? Shouldn't a mother be happy if her kids are happy instead of just focusing to make a random man happy? Why should my mother put a random men before her blood? Then why have kids? My mother should stick with her kids, not with a man from another family and that i don't give a damn about them.
@zaiah9252
@zaiah9252 2 жыл бұрын
That's the but you can say the same thing the other way around. It's a balance. Cause parents and adults can forget empathy. Its hard for a kid to grow up with their parents getting a divorce and then you have to grip with the reality that your gonna have a stepmom or dad. It's not easy for everyone
@idontwelcomeothermenaround6711
@idontwelcomeothermenaround6711 2 жыл бұрын
@@zaiah9252 I could tolerate a stepmom, but not a stepdad.
@misscamara12
@misscamara12 2 жыл бұрын
Kids need to be kept out of the relationship. Bitter exes can use kids to break apart a new relationship. Kids will naturally prefer for their parents to be together. They will always resist a new partner no matter how kind that person is. A relationship with a single parent can work only if you live separately and have minimal contact with their kids and exes. Otherwise find another childless person if you want marriage. Living with someone else’s kids even part time is difficult.
@annabanabanana
@annabanabanana 2 жыл бұрын
It’s hit or miss. With the right kid or kids I think it can make a relationship even more amazing. But if the kid is a mess mentally or really a difficult child I think it can hurt a relationship. Guess it all depends. Some kids are so easy to love. But doesn’t work that way for everyone.
@c0cochan3l29
@c0cochan3l29 5 жыл бұрын
🗣 KIDS LIVE WHAT THEY LEARN
@wombathappinessgirl7563
@wombathappinessgirl7563 5 жыл бұрын
That’s right now... Keep it real Uncle Steve...🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽
@snowbird1381
@snowbird1381 5 жыл бұрын
How bout before you get married and combine the family, you do some fun stuff together, like go on a trip or do some fun actives. That’ll give the kids a chance to warm up to the new parent and get to know them more.
@jazzyj904
@jazzyj904 5 жыл бұрын
I definitely don't agree with neglecting the feelings of children. It wasn't a date, it was marriage.
@lettucepreeysports1141
@lettucepreeysports1141 5 жыл бұрын
Marriage is a covenant between a man a woman and God...It's not a child's place to tell their parent if they should or shouldn't get married unless there are some glaring red flags that the kids are seeing. I know I've had a stepdad for almost 25 years now, I was upset when they told me they were getting married, I was around 12, and she had been single since I was 3. I wanted my mom to be single forever, it was selfish...she deserved to be with someone that would love her and treat her good.
@lettucepreeysports1141
@lettucepreeysports1141 5 жыл бұрын
@@TWMWFT Every situation is different. Doesnt mean that applies to everyone who has kids, so we will agree to disagree. Hate that happened to you and your day though. God Bless
@ashley-annasledge9869
@ashley-annasledge9869 4 жыл бұрын
Omis speaking from a respectable place and a person who has been/is going through this and not much older than you. I once got together with my siblings to push a man out of my mother’s life because I thought the same way as you and then my mother admitted that he wasn’t for her but later I grew to regret that decision because my mom deserved the right to make her own choices about what she wanted in her life. We had no right to take that decision away from her and hurt like that. Now we’re all married/coupled and busy getting on with our lives and now she’s alone and wishes she had a companion. I’ll never forgive myself for that. It breaks my heart to think of how immature (I was the same age as you) I was. Now at 24 I have to live with that and pray I don’t get a taste of my own medicine.
@charlesdikenson744
@charlesdikenson744 2 жыл бұрын
@@lettucepreeysports1141 AWW YOU ARE GOOD PERSON. ME AND MY SIBLINGS STOPPED OUR MUM FROM HAVING ANOTHER MAN WHEN OUR DAD MOVED OUT AND DEVORCED HER. I NOW REEGRET ASSISTING THEM WITH THE EVIL 😈 WE DID. WE SLAMMED DOORS AND GATES AT MEN WHO TRIED TO DATE HER. WE MADE IT REALLY IMPOSSIBLE. NOW MY MUM IS IN HER LATE 80'S IT'S TOO LATE
@ihatestepdads1472
@ihatestepdads1472 2 жыл бұрын
@@lettucepreeysports1141 A mom should love her kids more than a bastard from an other family. Tf is wrong with you?
@SB-fc6jy
@SB-fc6jy Жыл бұрын
Love the boundaries talk!!! Have to have boundaries!!
@rainacherienne1010
@rainacherienne1010 Жыл бұрын
I left the love of my life because he had kids. Life is very expensive, I couldn’t imagine that I’d had to struggle and do without because he’d be giving them money out of our house budget; that’s ridiculous, no sane woman would agree to it. I want a financially secure situation and couldn’t have it with him.
@travmusickable
@travmusickable Жыл бұрын
That's why men & women should only have kids after they're married and stay together forever like they made VOWS to. Because if a divorce happens....90% of the time the kids go with mom & Most men don't wanna settle for a single mom. And vice-versa if the man has primary custody
@TITLEWA
@TITLEWA 5 жыл бұрын
I agree with Steve on this one.
@waheedahsrecipes5004
@waheedahsrecipes5004 5 жыл бұрын
If I met the perfect persons and the children didn’t like me I would try to make it work and if it doesn’t I would walk away I would never try to come between a man and and children
@thrilla72
@thrilla72 5 жыл бұрын
Unless you've done something to them the children should come round eventually. The kids most likely want their biological parents to get back together. Despite however bad a relationship it was.
@A_Notes
@A_Notes 5 жыл бұрын
@@thrilla72 that's why those kids didn't agree with Steve and majorie being together
@loganhenderson650
@loganhenderson650 5 жыл бұрын
The children aren’t in the the relationship tho. If you and your SO love each other that’s all that matters. They don’t have to like it.
@loganhenderson650
@loganhenderson650 5 жыл бұрын
I think single mom and son is different like Steve said. Good or bad my mom told me everything (problems, insecurities, etc.). I was always at odds with them when they started dating b/c I didn’t want her to get hurt again. Them staying together through my tantrums helped me understand that she is in a better relationship and I can trust him to protect her.
@staylit4258
@staylit4258 4 жыл бұрын
So you would mess your blessing up for some snot nose kids I was always told that kids are to stay in a child’s place 💯
@josetrumpas8536
@josetrumpas8536 2 жыл бұрын
My son has no kids,he was datin a woman with 2 kids from different dads, i asked him ...are you using protection?,his answer was..oh she said she can't have babies,im like did she had a surgery to prevent that?or how is it that she can't?...fast forward they borke up ,six months later she was pregnant by another guy....told my kid ...see you dodged a bullet right there huh ,i told u she was looking for a daddy for those 2 kids...YOUR WELCOME SON 😉
@AM-mw2wu
@AM-mw2wu 2 жыл бұрын
Well done 👏you're an excellent parent. Teach your son to keep avoiding single mothers. There's nothing positive about dating single parents.
@nadjabilicka5071
@nadjabilicka5071 3 жыл бұрын
I have 4 children, my ex had 5 children! We have NOT once had problems about our children! I won his childrens heart, he won my childrens heart, and everything worked perfectly perfect! No problems if you both are mature people and truly love eachother. Your children will join the game when they see they parent happy.
@austind4301
@austind4301 2 жыл бұрын
And yet he’s your ex?
@nadjabilicka5071
@nadjabilicka5071 2 жыл бұрын
@@austind4301 Yes. We had other issues though😀
@JohnDoe-fm6md
@JohnDoe-fm6md 2 жыл бұрын
So the children were happy and you tore apart another family. Great mom
@nadjabilicka5071
@nadjabilicka5071 2 жыл бұрын
@@JohnDoe-fm6md I said we never had problems about the children- my children were adults- most of them- and his children were teenagers. My children liked my ex, but loved me more. When the relationship turned out to be a fraud, I didnt want my children to have a sad and depressed mom…. so I left him, and i dont regret it. But, our problems was never because of the many children that we had. It was our own classic relationship problems with cheating, lying, betrayals etc. If i would stay, I wouldnt had the strengt to be a good mom, or a healthy person.
@JohnDoe-fm6md
@JohnDoe-fm6md 2 жыл бұрын
@@nadjabilicka5071 I’ve heard this argument before about the parent making herself happy first. It’s nonsense. Just a nice arrangement of words that allows you to follow your whims guilt free. What happened to putting the children first.
@jenniferw5095
@jenniferw5095 2 жыл бұрын
My husband prioritizes his children, especially when it comes to my financial responsibility for them. I'm not paying for a 19 year old's phone. His daughter is a liar, she wants me to spend $6000 on a trip to Disneyland for her. Her only chore was to vacuum. And she only sassed me. And I spent $2500 to add her to my insurance that she didn't use because they couldn't complete coordination of benefits. Huge waste of MY money.
@AM-mw2wu
@AM-mw2wu 2 жыл бұрын
This is why I don't date men with kids. They expect everything and give nothing in return. It's all about them and their brats from another woman. I hope you're well though despite the cr*p you have to deal with.
@abigailgarcia3599
@abigailgarcia3599 5 жыл бұрын
Please remember that children struggle with their feelings too. If the child is not feeling included and embraced most likely they will not like the new partner. So, pay close attention to how children are behaving during that season and that will tell you a lot about the direction of the new relationship. It’s understandable that they would feel jealousy or even anger at times when they see their parent dating a new person, but if it’s going for a serious relationship the potential parent should take action in the wisest way possible. Remember, you might be a family one day. Act as one!
@ihatestepdads1472
@ihatestepdads1472 2 жыл бұрын
A stepfather is not family. He comes from an other family that i don't give a damn about them.
@amia.4444
@amia.4444 2 жыл бұрын
I’m confused so you basically saying you will date and marry a man that don’t care about your children
@zaiah9252
@zaiah9252 2 жыл бұрын
I will not apologize for being sympathetic over a kid who struggles to accept another person after their parents got a divorce. Especially for a bit cause that's your mom
@renegademade6384
@renegademade6384 Жыл бұрын
So you will be single for life
@JP-ll8iy
@JP-ll8iy Жыл бұрын
@@ihatestepdads1472 may I ask where is your bio Dad?
@simonsienna
@simonsienna 5 жыл бұрын
My mother died 11 years ago. I was already an adult at age 32. My parents had been married 30 years. They married when my brother and I were 2 years old. My biological father died when we were a year old. They were unable to have their own biological kids. So when my mother died, my father remarried a year later to someone 2 years younger than us with a 11 year old daughter. My father did ask us if it was ok with us for him to marry her. We met her a few times and she is an awesome person. My stepmother is treats us well. She is a friend and not another mother. They have 3 kids of their own and I adore all my little sisters. My father did adopt us 3 older kids and treats us no different than the younger 3. In summary, I think how well a family blends together is very dependent on how the new spouse treats the other spouse's children. If the person is like my stepmother, and not trying to replace a missing parent... things usually work out well.
@beastygaming1752
@beastygaming1752 5 жыл бұрын
i am still learning about how to be a parent so hard i love my children but this helped alot thank you it helped clear up concerns i am having!
@Marsha_Ann
@Marsha_Ann 11 ай бұрын
I'm still learning how to be a parent as well and my son is almost 12 yrs old now. It's even harder to raise a child of the opposite gender because you're not fully wired to understand the way a young boy thinks when you're a woman, and same with girls when you're a dad. Although I honestly feel like all of this advice was terrible! None of it seemed to take into consideration how the child feels about this person. They're instincts can't be any more wrong than a woman or an animal. My son doesn't like my bf because he's strict on him and he's used to me being the lenient single mom. My family don't like him either tho, I guess they don't like his energy.. 😕 But he's still a much better person than my ex/BD who was crazy, abusive and deadbeat criminal. This man claims his love for me all the time, he's supportive and affectionate, and very protective of me. He also helps me around the house, and we've been together for 5 years. So idk wat to do about everyone and their feelings about him.. 🤷🏾‍♀️
@jamiesouthofboston2411
@jamiesouthofboston2411 5 жыл бұрын
Never date people with kids in the house, ever.
@georgemcfly3482
@georgemcfly3482 10 ай бұрын
I'm starting to believe that relationships and dating is a waste of time
@preciousprecious6859
@preciousprecious6859 5 жыл бұрын
look at them now a beautiful couple imagine if they had listened to the kids
@Kieshak02
@Kieshak02 3 жыл бұрын
I know that’s right!! Kids are grown and so were y’all.
@patriciastraker8840
@patriciastraker8840 5 жыл бұрын
Very true Steve! Only their selfish behinds...ain't know nuttin...These kids ain't know Jack! But if the person is creepy and make them uncomfortable, well now I understand; let your kids talk from their hearts!
@glamspalife2645
@glamspalife2645 Жыл бұрын
❤thank you for this 🎉
@AchtlandQueen
@AchtlandQueen Жыл бұрын
It honestly just depends on the other person your considering to get into a serious relationship with. From a single moms perspective I can tell when a guys not ready. It doesn't make the man a bad bf or man but it makes a difference when it comes to a good match with a single mom. Because single mom's don't want someone who doesn't have the mentality for children. For one It takes a lot of patience and a lot of conversations or discussions to build a perfect parenting team. (Bc parents who aren't a team and seen as united will fall apart and let children manipulate the relationship) For two the relationship needs too stay happy n healthy for both parties. Kids are happy when their needs are met. If mom n step dad are happy the children will be happy too. Some single mom's don't know how to approach a relationship and it's hard. Because you have this whole story and this guy is stepping into a main characters role. There's a lot more boundaries that need to be set or agreed on but most importantly things need a lot more time to develope. The hardest part is finding someone willing to listen, to be honest with themselves, and be flexible enough to find happy middle grounds with each other. Not every man can just come in n pick up the pieces you want set right. It's unfair to expect that from anyone. Best to hear how the other person feels with direct conversation and listen to their opinion and perpective n find a pace that works best for the both of you. Not every women is going to find it easy to trust another person fully with every aspect to their childrens ether not when they have been doing things a certain way for so long. The mom needs time to adjust and feel good about the changes to her home. The guy needs to find where and how he fits and if he feels good about that. You want your kids to respect you and your partner and you want to be respect by your partner because you respect that person. There's nothing wrong with dating single mom's, but they don't want to be a side piece, have a meaningless fling for a couple months or to be with some one who wants to only play house. They want someone to complete their home and fill it with joy because having that home is as fulfilling to them as it is to their partner.
@abenijones311
@abenijones311 Жыл бұрын
Great answer Steve!!
@lovetotravel780
@lovetotravel780 Жыл бұрын
I am not surprised the daughters had a problem with their dad getting married. Teenage and adult daughters are sometimes the worst among other things. I know you can not help who you fall in love with but I would recommend men without kids date women who do not have any kids and ladies that do not have any kids stay away from men with kids especially if he has a daughter.
@JP-ll8iy
@JP-ll8iy Жыл бұрын
Great advice. I’m in a blended family, my fiancé has two girls and I have one little dude. And man, this is hard (especially when the oldest is a Minnie version of her toxic bitter mother) So the other day, My girlfriend made a comment she’s open to dating a man with kids and i wanted to jump through the phone and smack her on the head. Told her to date in her lane and her age group. People don’t realize how hard it is to make a blended family work, it’s work and more work.
@agnes4398
@agnes4398 2 жыл бұрын
Me too. It's sad. There are always kids to consider .
@snowbird1381
@snowbird1381 4 жыл бұрын
Ok ima say this. If you’re marrying into a family, do not tell the kids to just shut up and deal with it. That’s how you keep them distant with you and they won’t come to you for anything. Instead show them that they can trust you. Because that’s a huge change to a child’s life.
@renegademade6384
@renegademade6384 Жыл бұрын
They have a wonderful marriage and if they had listened to the kids they'd be screwed
@dutchceezweh8069
@dutchceezweh8069 Жыл бұрын
The worst thing you can do as a man,is to become a step father.
@Americanpatriot-zo2tk
@Americanpatriot-zo2tk 6 ай бұрын
My exes kids are both nutcases! Their adults but she’s made her decision and she allowing her kids to make her decisions I can’t deal with it anymore.
@aaliyahthomas1456
@aaliyahthomas1456 5 жыл бұрын
I understand what he is saying completely. But I'm going to say this, sometimes kids see things that the adults don't or are ignoring. If they are negative things that could potentially affect child and even the parent, you should be aware of that. I've heard of stories where two people will get married disregarding the child, and then some time down the line the child starts being abused by the step parent. But the mother or father dismissed that child's uncomfortableness or dislike. Now you have a child who will eventually grow up to be an adult with a lot if issues, including resentment and anger towards both people. Kids don't know everything. But adults don't either. The child's voice should always be heard. It doesn't have to dictate how every single thing goes, but you reduce certain issues because you were able to hear that child out and do what is best for both you and the child.
@renegademade6384
@renegademade6384 Жыл бұрын
You seem like the kind of person that spoils amd gives kods to much power
@candlecane
@candlecane 5 жыл бұрын
I love seeing Shannon.
@PrincessBran
@PrincessBran Жыл бұрын
Short answer yes!
@missdaisy9
@missdaisy9 3 жыл бұрын
Great!!👏👏👏👏👏👏
@galacticos2678
@galacticos2678 11 ай бұрын
They both had kids , that's a different dynamic. Its totally different when only one has kids.
@gedogdarker7211
@gedogdarker7211 Жыл бұрын
This is how i see it Steve is right kids have no say in if you get married or not but asking a kid to accept them as a new parent when they already have one thats a whole other issue
@nephytania
@nephytania Жыл бұрын
Oh, how wise they are! The adults can do whatever they wish and the kids must agree with everything! I think if they agree with a new partner of their mum, it is already pretty enough. Living with stepbrothers and stepsisters can be too much. The adults must think before they give birth to their children about possible divorces and their consequences. The children must not be devoted of any rights here.
@arlenewilliams4731
@arlenewilliams4731 5 жыл бұрын
The age of the kids matter.
@NewCreationInChrist896
@NewCreationInChrist896 5 жыл бұрын
Love the panel. #Brad
@dbizzle85
@dbizzle85 4 ай бұрын
Absolutely, i met a girl who checked every single box and i loved being around her. Legit was perfect She had two kids, and couldn't have anymore. I cant and won't justify putting effort, finances etc. in someone elses children. One of her kids was awesome (son) her daughter was the worst
@sbc4497
@sbc4497 2 ай бұрын
My kids were happy with me marrying my husband. 1 of my stepkids was happy too, the eldest and the youngest stepkids were the opposite and behaved atrociously after we got married. Eldest did so in hopes I would leave their dad. Eldest believed dad would run to their mom if he was so bad towards my family and myself. He went to the extreme and the other only sabotaged herself from having meaningful Relationships within the blended family. The youngest would destroy other kids’ things, pee on other kids’ toys, backpacks and clothes. She got so mad she was sent to bed early night before for her behavior(1 hour earlier than normal) she pooped on herself and tried to go to school like that the next day. She was 8 years old at the time. She was mild vs the eldest. Thankfully my husband and I always stood on united front but it made those two more angry about it despite the other parent not having any part in their life. Therapy for both did very little to help them. Eldest is grown and away and the youngest we implemented plenty of daily extracurricular activities for years now on her plate she is tired by the time she is at home. She doesn’t have the energy or the time.
@clidechristoph5649
@clidechristoph5649 5 жыл бұрын
kids are supposed to know there place
@B.A.B.G.
@B.A.B.G. 5 жыл бұрын
And it's their (correct orthography; you should try it sometime) place to voice their opinion, or fight it, if someone enters their life who is NOT family.
@clidechristoph5649
@clidechristoph5649 5 жыл бұрын
@@B.A.B.G. true but sometimes adults these days let kids run there home and i believe its the adults who has the say
@clidechristoph5649
@clidechristoph5649 5 жыл бұрын
@itsdatruff true and im just 16 and i know this ,y because im raised right
@clidechristoph5649
@clidechristoph5649 5 жыл бұрын
@itsdatruff thanks
@dance4life1208
@dance4life1208 5 жыл бұрын
nah can't date someone with kids, I'm already trying to get you to like me now i to to get your kid to like me too
@SDBROOKS08
@SDBROOKS08 5 жыл бұрын
LORI HARVEY ON MY WISHLIST.
@TheNyakaat
@TheNyakaat 5 жыл бұрын
I remember watching a video of Steve some years back where he said the kids ASKED THEM TO GET MARRIED.
@ZionFame
@ZionFame 5 жыл бұрын
😂😂😂😂😂😂meaning ?
@creating1_c1999
@creating1_c1999 5 жыл бұрын
Please share. He has always maintained that it was not a smooth transition at the beginning. Here he says the boys collectively wanted it. The girls were apprehensive. I can see why Brandi and Karli would be ambivalent. They watched that train wreckage of a marriage to Mary and how that broke his sons. Lori was her mom's baby girl. For her getting married would be the end of her being the center of her mom's world.
@vanessagamino6826
@vanessagamino6826 Жыл бұрын
What happens when you’re with a single parent and live with them and their kid for a few years and the relationship ends? Is the right thing to forever be in that child’s life? Wondering cause I started dating a guy who is still involved with his exes kid and curious how others have navigated this
@michaelangst6078
@michaelangst6078 5 жыл бұрын
It would be dumb to walk away if you truly found your ''perfect match' the kids will probably not like anybody with their mother besides their real dad... Men should always know this before they date a single mom in the first place
@serwaa2227
@serwaa2227 5 жыл бұрын
Steve’s point is only if you have grown children
@carableu
@carableu 5 жыл бұрын
Three good looking guys on the panel...
@vnchezor
@vnchezor 5 жыл бұрын
Lol Steve 😂😂😂
@juicyfruit4709
@juicyfruit4709 5 жыл бұрын
I am like Steve on that. You kept it 💯.👏👏❤❣Your right👏👏👏.Dr. lish
@Realunq1
@Realunq1 Жыл бұрын
U pray the kids away lol jp 👀
@generalsaufenberg4931
@generalsaufenberg4931 5 жыл бұрын
no! end of the video! if he/she is the "perfect" match, you find a way!
@MoniDobbs
@MoniDobbs Жыл бұрын
Im about to end it with a man who is divorced with 2 children. One of the kids lives here full time and she is 14 years old. I can't take it anymore. We hardly get time alone and when we do, he is overcome with guilt because he believes we should ALL HANG out. The mother is not involved and chose to leave the state, so I am in a position of having to play mom. I don't like it, plus I have no kids of my own. He constantly puts me and his daughter in a similar category. For example, He will say, " You two must love waffles because they run out so fast." or "You two are so hard-headed." It's not true. We are 2 different ppl. She has habits and so do I. But we do not do the same things. It doesn't help that she is socially awkward either. She is gloomy and boring. AHHHHHH!!! I can't wait to get the heck away from him and his baggage!!!!
@travmusickable
@travmusickable Жыл бұрын
Why are you in youtube comments section spewing all of this to the world when you should be sitting down and explaining this to your BF. This goes for man or woman...date someone that WANTS to spend time with you willingly as you would with them . Dating single parents isn't rewarding for the person that doesn't have kids. Leave him.
@Itsjustacomment
@Itsjustacomment 28 күн бұрын
😆😆
@lifeofmiki6766
@lifeofmiki6766 3 жыл бұрын
Kids and they dead beat mothers yes absolutely
@panasheg833
@panasheg833 5 жыл бұрын
Shannon!!
@msscorpio5516
@msscorpio5516 5 жыл бұрын
What’s happening
@kvs7876
@kvs7876 10 ай бұрын
I agree with Steve, a child should not run a relationship. They have no clue what they are talking about.
@Urnotwelcomed-tl9me
@Urnotwelcomed-tl9me 2 ай бұрын
It’s killing my friendship with my bestfriend, her kids are annoying as hell
@brentpladson2050
@brentpladson2050 7 ай бұрын
If you are happy with someone then that’s on you and that person. F what kids think or have to say.
@alexandriacaton2054
@alexandriacaton2054 5 жыл бұрын
Not a good idea. The attention will be focused more on the kids. Kids should be their main priority which means you’re going to come second place. I’ve seen this happen with my friend. I wouldn’t recommend it at all.
@geneillebaker6986
@geneillebaker6986 5 жыл бұрын
Love her)him you love the kids
@glamspalife2645
@glamspalife2645 Жыл бұрын
Honestly my kids don't run my show or relationship as long as they are not being abused or hurt they can't decide whose for me because i wouldn't want that for them once they get older
@desii2249
@desii2249 5 жыл бұрын
Hi
@littlewhisper1045
@littlewhisper1045 3 жыл бұрын
If you got kids then it’s a no lol. I won’t like them and it’s the truth.
@randyoden11
@randyoden11 5 жыл бұрын
I tell the same thing steve said
@irubberyouglueonethousand5384
@irubberyouglueonethousand5384 Жыл бұрын
2:37 I thought that was Whitney Cummings
@ramonaharris920
@ramonaharris920 2 жыл бұрын
At the age of 55, it’s impossible to meet a straight man without kids.
@grey3083
@grey3083 2 жыл бұрын
But all their kids are probably grown so they have more free time then the dad that wakes up with his kid and takes them to school daily
@Slim2xzIsland
@Slim2xzIsland Жыл бұрын
You been ran through?
@mixedmamiiD
@mixedmamiiD 5 жыл бұрын
He didn't say why the daughter's had a problem. I'm wondering.
@PJ68822
@PJ68822 7 ай бұрын
I wish I watched this vdo before 😢
@Zaynyak51
@Zaynyak51 Жыл бұрын
I've dated a few women with children but I married my wife and she has a child from a previous relationship and I can with 100 percent certainty but that child negatively affects the relationship especially if the child is young
@lungbusteroutdoors4783
@lungbusteroutdoors4783 2 жыл бұрын
A serious relationship with a woman with kids is a death sentence
@ramonaharris920
@ramonaharris920 2 жыл бұрын
Steve’s daughters knew Marjorie was a gold digger!
@Brownandproud1145
@Brownandproud1145 Жыл бұрын
Lord find me a girl without kids!!!!
@lisas8080
@lisas8080 5 жыл бұрын
I disagree with Steve. The child's perspective should definitely be accounted for especially if they're young and will be subject to the authority of this person. Before my mom's partner moved in with us my mom talked to me and asked if I'd be okay with it. And before they got married she asked if I'd be okay with it. As a child I felt empowered, loved, and heard. And because of her approach I felt secure knowing my mom would always put me and my well-being first and foremost.
@lisas8080
@lisas8080 5 жыл бұрын
Elle D Precisely Elle. It used to be case that people would say children should be seen and not heard; leaving them voiceless and subject to the consequences of decisions and actions of adults. Now we have adults who live in this protracted adolescence where it's always about their happiness and the child is left to just accept it. Then we wonder why we have to have all these conversations about women and men finding their voice as a adult. I'm grateful I felt as though I had a say and that I was shown early on that how I feel matters.
@cutienerdgirl
@cutienerdgirl 5 жыл бұрын
@@lisas8080 The people on the panel never said children can't have a voice, but ultimately they're CHILDREN. They don't have emotional maturity and throw tanturms over the smallest things. Some kids just simply think their biological parent is being replaced. If your child doesn't like who you're dating or are going to marry you can talk about these issues as a family and set boundaries in place for each other.
@lisas8080
@lisas8080 5 жыл бұрын
Pink That's precisely what was said. Listen to Steve and to the first person who says 'shut up, this is my house'. Children tend to through tantrums over things, but that shouldn't be confused with an inability to communicate a material discomfort with someone. The primary boundary to be managed is this toxic authoritarianism we show toward kids. Don't get me wrong, it's important to be a parent and to have clear lines of authority - I had no confusion about who was in charge - but too often their voices are diminished on account of their being young from adults who purport to know better, but too often get it wrong.
@Jay-jb2vr
@Jay-jb2vr 5 жыл бұрын
@Utube Allday Wow......
@sindiswamntambo3193
@sindiswamntambo3193 Жыл бұрын
But your situation is different Mr Steve u both already had kids, what happens when I don't have any and my partner does??
@workinperkins
@workinperkins 3 жыл бұрын
😊
@serenesantos2745
@serenesantos2745 5 жыл бұрын
Stockings caps
@zero1188
@zero1188 5 жыл бұрын
parents relationship comes before the kids. unless the kids seen extreme red flag deal breakers signs then their opinion is irrelevant
@zero1188
@zero1188 3 жыл бұрын
@Stepfather Hater wrong
@zero1188
@zero1188 3 жыл бұрын
@Stepfather Hater parents set the tone. it trickle down to the kids. if the parents dont respect each other the kids wont respect the parents. and that also leads to them not knowing what a functional relationship looks like. parents relationship with one another is more important
@Eacm114
@Eacm114 Ай бұрын
Now lemme ask you this: What if, say the kid is obedient, he respects boundaries, etc is overall a good kid, but he still doesn't like your partner and you've been with this person for years at this point. What would you do? Try to force them to like each other? I'm curious
@Eacm114
@Eacm114 Ай бұрын
Also, keep in mind, the kid is close with the other parent.
@zero1188
@zero1188 Ай бұрын
@@Eacm114 do nothing. If your partner havent done anything bad to your kid for them to not like them then the kid needs time. If they never get over it thats not nothing the parent can do about it. Parents should still go along with the relationship as long as they are not hurting the kid
@moisesquinteros8208
@moisesquinteros8208 10 ай бұрын
Steve Harvey has a ton of relationship experience with his multiple wife’s and women he left. He should know better. Sounds like his kids do not want to repeat his relationship adventures
@ZionFame
@ZionFame 5 жыл бұрын
I will work out cuz if I'm not happy I don't think I will be happy to take care of my children. I will work it out so they understand this is what makes mom happy and when she is happy we going to happy as well and have a happy family 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦
@robertmanini2084
@robertmanini2084 5 жыл бұрын
No they can’t.
@iraqikurd93
@iraqikurd93 4 жыл бұрын
We all know why Steve's sons were cool with her....., his daughters were not because they saw a gold digger. That woman married two drug lords, how much more do you need to know?!
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