drank a handle of honey jd every night for 8 years. started a successful business in the middle of it. ended up in a coma on life support for 3 weeks. bled out, couldnt walk, but drove myself to ER! sober 5 years in one month.

I was hospitalized for 13 days because of this functioning alcoholic shit and was on death's doorstep at the age of 29. So fucking crazy. It didn't matter if I woke up at 5am or 10am, I had to drink a double-shot of vodka with orange juice just to stop the trembling and panic attacks due to anxiety. I don't regret it since it has lead me to where I am now. I spent a year crawling out of my skin as I recovered. I paced relentlessly around the house, couldn't sleep, and couldn't be around crowds. Then, the craving was lifted from me in only what I can describe as a miracle. Since then, I've picked up running again which I gave up after high school, lost 40 lbs, and have completed several half marathons and will begin training soon for a marathon. I still can't drink orange juice to this day lol. I have a wonderful marriage and 2 children now who are my life. I know that if I ever pick up the bottle again that none of them would mean anything to me anymore and I would abandon them for the drink. Such is the power of this crap on people like me. I wish the best to anyone out there struggling today. Please seek help before you get taken to the grave.

I don't drink even near that much but I still have an addiction to it. Alcohol has did so much damage to my life in so many ways. Recently I started drinking during the day to reduce shakey hands and anxiety. I need to quit today.

Really started recognizing that I might have a problem was the fact... how much more expensive drinking has become.Everything going well, but here I am hammered every evening since a year. But man, the tolerance just gets extreme. I'll go to seek help after Christmas.

Well done!! You are amazing your voice is very calming. You must have felt so lonely...I hope that you can help many who are in similar situation. I wish you the all the best.

Thank you for posting this.

Very well done for getting sober. And very good of you for trying to help others. It does sadden me that you had to or felt you needed to spend so much money to achieve sobriety.

I’m a poly addict and something that I’ve found throughout my experience with addiction is the substance that are legal are the most dangerous like I’ve struggled with alcohol and cigarette addiction more then anything else

Thank you for sharing your story!

Thank you, you have done alot for me for posting this video.

Drank beer for 30+ years. Got sober by going to 12 step meetings, switching to sparkling water and just not picking up a drink. Getting sober, getting away from the routine of alcohol; most important thing I ever did for myself. If you're unhappy with your relationship with alcohol, go to meetings and listen. You don't have to do anything else anybody will try and tell you. Go to meetings. They are there for you and the feeling there, it's not a bunch gloom. It's a powerful, loving, non judgemental energy. 9 out of 10 times, you will walk out after a meeting feeling better than I can describe here.

I drink 2 bottles of wine a day and often add vodka to the mix. I am the manager where I work and am studying for a degree. No hangovers and continue to get promoted at work

I'm an addict through and through. Last weekend I dropped dead from Fentanyl, the week leading up to that over 80mg of ativan, a tab of acid with xanax the weekend before. Yesterday a 1.5L of white wine. No wonder why I feel misery and hopelessness after these experiences. It's crazy, but I go back to the same crutch nearly every time. And I've been sober, productive, positive for small bouts. Doing these stunts since the age of 12 has re-wired my brain in a way I am afraid will take a lifetime of mending.

Congratulations. Stay Strong. God Bless.

Deryck - you were in a very bad place and you managed to escape it - good on yer for helping others who may have similar problems. I won't raise a glass to you because I don't do alcohol in any form, but I wish you good health.

They believe they are hiding it well but they're not. It's very easy to find their stashes, and they always have a similar sweet ketoacidosis smell, or smell like they're combustible. Both my parents are life long alcoholics. My father almost died from a ruptured thrombosis in his throat, and my mother was hospitalized for liver failure and fell into an alcohol withdrawal coma for 2 weeks. I'm so sensitive to the signs of severe alcoholism that I can see the symptoms in acquaintances I meet. Tremors, eye shaking and appearance they're looking through you not at you, white nail beds, red palms, spider veins, and especially the smell they emit. It actually triggers my anxiety. The constant use of hand-sanitizers at the office due to the pandemic, causes me emotional disturbances... and this is still after not seeing or speaking to either of my parents for over a decade. I am a result of what alcoholism does to the people who love them.

I over came Xanax addiction may 7 2016. Was the craziest and probably hardest thing i have done. My body went through shit like I’ve never thought could happen. Was not prescribed them. Was that kind of addiction. Felt shame and guilt and such absolute anxiety towards the end. Anxiety to take anxiety medicine. Sounds crazy. Was my body telling me it’s time. I took that warning and just said fuck it. Cold turkey. Thought every day I was gonna have a seizure but there wasn’t shit I could do. I bought them on the streets and just couldn’t get any. I drank at that time as well. Bought a six pack a day. That’s what probably got me through. At the time. Didn’t realize. I substituted Xanax for alcohol. 6 pack a day. What the hell that ain’t nothin at least I’m not barred out anymore right. May 7 is coming up and I can’t even sit here and be proud of myself. I drink a pint or more of tequila a day and barely get drunk. I’m right back in the rotation of fear that if I stop I will have a seizure or worse and I just have nothing but guilt for drinking. Like I said before. My body telling me it’s time to stop i believe. Idk. If anyone is gonna read this ramble. But I’m so damn ready to be free and sober. I’m ready to stop but rehab is not an option. Any advise on tapering off?

Hi Deryck. Inspiring stuff. Thanks. I'll check out the webinar. I hardly drank at all from my teens right through to my late 30s. Christmas mainly. An occasional bottle of wine. A few beers now and then. I was too into the fitness thing - running - and booze didn't figure in that. But I always suffered from anxiety, and began to get depressions in my mid-30s. I had a mental health referral, and they put me straight into an alcohol program, telling me that alcohol was the cause of my depressions - even though, at the time, I was still drinking less than 21 units a week. Seriously. Anyway... once I was told that alcohol was a problem, sure enough it became one. I'm 59 now, and over the years my 'self-medication' has increased - usually in periods of extreme stress, such as with my last partner 3 years ago. At that time, too, I was finally (very late)-diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome, which finally gave me answers about my lifelong anxieties and difficulties with social situations. Cut to now... I have fewer stressors. But the habit is still there, and is becoming harder to kick. Although I don't drink at the levels you were on, I can regularly get through between 12 and 18 units a day at weekends (sometimes more), and probably average 9 units a day over the course of a week. I don't drink every day, I don't have shakes or withdrawals, I've never had DTs, I don't drink during the day. But I know it's a slippery slope. I've been in trouble with the law, too, once through drinking - and have made embarrassing public spectacles of myself. I'm in good health, very fit for a man my age, and I eat wel... but I know booze is doing damage, and sooner or later it'll catch up with me. Maybe my habits make me more of a problem drinker than a high-functioning alcoholic - but I know I could easily slip from one to the other. I'm glad I saw this today - just as I was thinking of going out to get a few beers for the evening. Thanks, mate.

Good to hear your testimony.

Thanks for sharing, I'm basically looking into a mirror as I would, get clean one day and share my ways approaches, thoughts opinions to help and such ones like myself, if that makes any sense lol # I wish I never touched it.

I really resonated with this video. You still sober? I’ve been in rehab twice but want to do it for myself now pretty soon. I’m 38 and in addiction since 15

Thanks for you telling truth.....we love you... jesus always love you.... Telling truth is showing you have brave heart and you love the people ......not only your self... thanks a lots......

Hi Deryck, Great video i have been a high functioning alcoholic for about 15 years similar to you a good job nice family. Lost it all as drinking was my crutch and working in a sales environment. Lost really good jobs through my alcohol addiction ans been done for drink driving will now be my third time. I became a born again Christian about 2 years ago which really helped. But stopped going to Church the last 6 months due to my work commitments, and have fell back into my old ways, drinking after work and trying to hide it from my wife. Feeling very remorseful as I dont know what to say to work when i go back. My church have advised me to go into rehab and are trying to help me. Seen your traing video it really brought things home is as to where my life has gone from being good again to where i was 2 years ago. Feeling scared and dont know what to do apart from reaching out to God.

Did I hear that right? Two bottles of vodka a day? Wow! And my family thinks I drink too much! Well, I am happy that you recovered from such a dark and serious situation.

This helped mate. Thank you

I had acute pancreatitis in 2012 and from intensive care to high dependicy I nearly died I was in hospital 18 days and lost 2.5 stone in weight I now have been six years sober and I’ve been back to the gym I enjoyed this before I started drinking. I. also got prosecuted for drink driving

God, the physical AND mental shakes were hell on earth. Awful awful feelings.

My doctor said am I trying to kill myself. I couldn’t answer

Did you have symptoms healthwise before pancreatitis? So scary, how do you get out of it?

God bless you and thankyou

Im on my 2nd dwi cannot get a 3rd but after probation I started again and this time I think its worse. Had to go stone cold sober cause if I would have tested positive I would have went back to jail and ended up in the hospital... instead of helping they just stop you from weening off

I’m craving booze bad after 4pm - only 5 pints does the trick, just had a baby too so I’m drinking vodka in the cellar , think I’ve got issues

God bless. Thank you!

Know alcohol is a depressant , also to help know that AA definition of a drink problem is you are powerless over your first drink = addiction. or you are allergic to Alcohol ..both can cause mayhem .

2 bottles vodka and red wine a DAY? Man you're truly lucky to be alive regardless of tolerance...

really great

I drink a bottle of vodka a day, I spend my morning in recovery mode but still crave a drink when I get home. I don't drink while working, and don't crave a drink until I finish. Were does this place me?

I drink because I'm social isolated and depressed. Weather I drink of not, I'm non functioning either way. Hell, I can't even get a therapist because of my social phobia

I’ve got a hangover ,after one bottle of beer ,it’s not severe but tired ,down to 2/3 bottles a week ,it was never really a massive problem but just a habit ,

god bless you for bearing your soul

Good video. I've known my fair share of high functionals, and these are definitely some good signs to be aware of. However, I have a question for you - what would one call a low functional alcoholic whose problem is obvious but who *still* completely denies drinking - at all - to everyone? I've seen almost no information related to this particular phenomenon, yet I was thoroughly subjected to it growing up. (For context, let me tell you why I'm asking about this. This might be a lengthy comment, so I'll apologize in advance.) Living with a closeted alcoholic parent whose addiction was *tremendously* obvious to everyone (but, would - under no circumstances - admit it) was perhaps the most defining, dominating aspect of my childhood experience. And although she denied her problem, unlike most coverts, my mom was NOT a functional alcoholic. Her heavy, daily drinking of vodka disabled her to the point where she never really worked, thus rendering her a "homemaker" and phone person for my dad's small business (and barely functioned even at that. My mom was blatantly drunk all the time, and everyone knew it. She would drank upwards of a bottle of vodka a day and it was obvious. There were scores of empty bottles deeply hidden in closets or cabinets, or in the attic (a habit, which over time, she had grown increasingly sloppier at, "hiding" her problem practically in plain sight. That she stopped bothering with throwing them out, they certainly began to pile up!). Yet, regardless of how obvious it was, my learned experience was that no one talked about it. It was clearly the elephant in the room but seemingly everyone in my family pretended like she didn't drink (myself including, as was my conditioning). To my knowledge, no one (at least on her side of the family) mentioned it - at all, ever. All this meant was that I had no one to talk to and I felt like no one would help me to help her. I wanted her to get well so that I would have a mom like everyone else. On the rare occasions that she was called out on it - usually by my dad (though seemingly only once in a blue moon) - all that came of it was a catagorical denial, and that was that. I remember a particularly sad moment where my dad picked up her vodka orange juice and flatly (though angrily) said "you're drinking". As she denied it, I felt scared for her, because her secret was on the line. My dad said, "Sip this, Andy - tell me if that tastes like plain orange juice." I was in elementary and didn't know what alcohol even tasted like, but it was definitely NOT normal OJ. Yet, beyond all reasoning, I denied that there was anything overtly wrong with it. To get out of the situation, I simply concurred with her excuse that maybe it had "soured" somehow. I remember clear as day, my dad saying, "You've brainwashed him." I didn't really know what that meant at the time, but when I looked it up later I was horrified to discover that I had indeed been brainwashes. This manifested in my assumption was that my mom must have had a good reason to hide her drinking, that in some way, she must need it as one might need medicine, and so - in an effort to "protect" her, if ever I was asked about my mom's obvious alcoholism, I would do as she would and deny that she drank. However, in 8th grade, tired of coming home from school and seeing her passed out drunk on the floor (as well as with her increasingly neglecting to pick me up from school), I finally confronted her on it. As usual, she staunchly denied it - but I openly rejected her denial. This, of course, deeply upset her. As a result, she became almost catatonic and wouldn't talk to or acknowledge me - at all. Later that night, I got a letter pushed under my bedroom door, whereupon she proclaimed that she was an awful mother and that since she was so awful, she would probably have to leave forever, as I would be better off without her. As a mere 8th grader, this was devastating - it was, I'm fact, the last thing I wanted - and so as to avoid this outcome, I just went back to pretending that she didn't drink. Thus, the status quo was maintained. Sadly, my dad died when I was 17, which meant that literally the only other person in my family who had ever at least on occasion reject her lies was gone, and so I alone was forced to deal with it. Though this experience was largely horrible, I end by saying that this story would have something of happy (if bittersweet) ending. In my early 20s, I was no longer under her complete control, and so I full throatedly forced the issue - daily. Constantly. I would take her hidden bottles and place them everywhere. I would sometimes dump full ones down the drain. Long story short (though already too long), my efforts would eventually pay off. Though she would nearly die in the hospital from incredibly severe DTs (like you, she was given a low chance of survival, as her body was wrecked by the disease - even slipping at one point into a coma) - she did come out of it and remained sober. I finally had my real mom and she was great. Unfortunately, she would shortly after be diagnosed with a deadly form of lung disease and would die 5 year later from it. I wish I had gotten to know my recovered mom for longer, as she was so different in a good way, but I'm thankful I got to experience it at all. That's all. Does this problem have a title or can you refer to information on this (extremely gaslighting-based) form of alcoholism? (Sorry again for the long comment, but hopefully it will be of use to you or one of your listeners)

i finish 2 bottles of whiskey 70cl in a month. is that too much? i love whiskey :)

I do drink.and yes i imbibe more than most.but its the cigerettes which go with it...i drink every other day perhaps 3 days without.im not a regular smoker.but soon as i have a jd or stella .im opening a pack of marlborough..been through a difficult break up not blaming that.but its escapism.perhaps i feel its a treat after a hard day..just saying obviously we in our own right have a duty of care to our own health.but sometimes a hard shoulder is needed.not the get a grip.wake up sort.

The amonts of alcohol that people drink kan be a bit fuzzy. Two bottles of vodka a day. What is a bottle? In Sweden you buy booze in either 35 cl or 70 cl bottles. The 70 cl bottle is called "A Whole". In my worst days I drank about one 70 cl bottle every day. This guy drank two bottles a day. Maybe it is two 70 cl bottles. Its possible.

I’m in this situation right now. I’m working 80 hours a week to support everything that I own and on top off that I’m drinking everyday for my anxiety and depression and I’m just loosing my mind right now. I’m so sick off working 80 hours a week so I can support my nasty lifestyle.

After reading most of the comments here, it seems the the overall view is that any amount of alcoholic beverage is too much and in view of the subject matter here, I understand. My question will sound silly but why would that stop me from asking it? So what's the deal with Doctors saying that 2 drinks a day is acceptable, assuming of course one is not struggling with alcoholism?

I been experience sweating nights ,that happends just right away when i try to go to sleep I mean if i go to bed at 9 30 pm By 10 i start sweating alot sr, Is that good or bad? I have depresion to as well

I had acute pancreatitis 10 years ago and ive continued drinking i need help. Dont know what to do.

good video thank you

I lost my family to my drinking ..im going threw a divorce its been 4 months. The wound still feels fresh ..im 1 day sober.i don't think that'll last..

😥And what do you call it when someone can go weeks at a time without drinking but then EVERY TIME they do, it's until they pass out? (Turns into a verbally abusing drunk) I guess he's right, I am over sensitive. Haven't found a vid on that yet.

Hope

Two bottles a day....damn. I lm quitting and I drink one a week.

I gave up a man I loved because of his alcohol addiction. He was 66 How long can one drink like this before hitting bottom? Thanks for being honest. I feel pity because I didnt know what he was feeling but obviously it wasnt me he desired. I can see your pain. Does he feel any when he is still drinking?

damn, i drink 2 bottles a vodka a week, you did that a day, it seems i good...

In the UK cocaine is a big problem too...

Im on groundhog day. No more.

How do I get your help

First things first...Alcohol is NOT the root problem. “Self” is the real issue. If the focus is on “not drinking”, you’re doomed. We can’t think our way into sobriety, we must live it. Go to meetings, clean house, and help others. Simple!

i don't have thousands and thousands of dollars but appreciate you. thx for posting!!! . . .

Looks like your at jurassic park

If I don't have weed, I drink, and I smoke cigarettes. talk about being fucked with addiction

Huh

Two bottles of vodka a day and wine at night? Jesus Christ!

Funny how the Danish have it right....finish work at 5 without question, out the door no phones no emails until 9 o'clock at night..., just get out of work! We are a stupid Country......

It's just not that much. It's a lot of money. Being an alcoholic takes loads of cash.

I'm diabetic and people assume I am an alcoholic. I though I was because I used to put a bit on coffee every day. You know... christians don't like it. It's just a bit. I didn't know that people are so conservative with a bit of booze on coffee. They think that you are drunk.

I drink 12 to 20 beers every night. Lately, for the past couple months, my days have been filled with anxiety and indecision while I pace and chain smoke. I make bad decisions in this state. It's only when I start drinking I feel better.

I NEEDED TO GET A HANDLE....ON MY DRINKING SO I SWITCHED....TO GALLONS

The audio sync is so off

How to do something about it: Pay me your money. haha.