The creepy problem with the adorable 'coquette' aesthetic

Рет қаралды 756,300

Жыл бұрын

“Coquette” is one of TikTok’s favorite new aesthetics. The cutesy look features soft pinks, frills, and hair bows But it looks like it might have a problem we’ve definitely seen before…
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@lucyhannah1227 Жыл бұрын

There is literally no way to dress as a woman without being accused of trying to attract men. You dress sexy, youre doing it to be sexy for men. You dress cute, also for men. Dress relaxed and tomboyish, pick me behavior for men. When does it end.

@anna.0701 Жыл бұрын

Exactly!! Its so tiring why is it so hard to just accept that a lot of us just do it for ourselves

@vintageguitar777 Жыл бұрын

That’s literally the definition of the word

@anna.0701 Жыл бұрын

@@vintageguitar777 so just because of that one word people who dress this way just have to deal w the fact that they apparently all do it for men or what

@Notjust-T Жыл бұрын

fr like can we stop with the pick me thing😒

@MaxMaxluv 11 ай бұрын

Im so sick of that pick me girl shit! I have a group of guy friends and they just like being around me and my step mom thinks that i need to look more girly for more girls to hang out with me. I keep my own style modest, respectful and diligent, i don't need to wear what others are wearing i wear WHAT I want! People now sometimes can't just be their own person without having someone gaslighting and influencing dumb standards like "freckles are ugly". This is a terrible generation.

@katyhashim Жыл бұрын

your Lolita definition is not the same as Lolita fashion.

@palakjain510 Жыл бұрын

Yeah exactly. It's the Japanese one. Safiya Nygaard explains it very well in her Japanese trip and fashion videos.

@amityislandchum Жыл бұрын

@@palakjain510 The Japanese Lolita trend is based on the exact same pedophilic desire. It's funny how many of you don't seem to understand that pedophilia is HUGE in Japan.

@ZymXm Жыл бұрын

Thank you for saying this, People don't seem to understand the difference

@rhino1876 Жыл бұрын

Thank you I was about to be up in arms. I wear EGL everyday. It doesn’t have any correlation to the book 🙅🏼‍♀️

@maripositaamor Жыл бұрын

Tell me u made a video without doing ANY research… without telling me u made a video without doing ANY research 🤦‍♀️ Lolita has literally nothing to do with the book. It’s Japanese words mixed together 🙄 It’s inspired by the pomp and opulence of the Victorian era clothing, not “little girls being preyed upon by grown men”

@teavran Жыл бұрын

Please stop associating Lolita fashion with the book 😭 I just want to enjoy my frilly dresses in peace ffs

@Eminem_ontop 10 ай бұрын

FR Bro it’s like saying black hoodies suck and then somone calling u racist like js bc I said one thing don’t refer it to another 😭

@loveinstars 9 ай бұрын

@@Eminem_ontophuh,,??

@Eminem_ontop 9 ай бұрын

@@loveinstars huh,,?

@elizabethconley4996 8 ай бұрын

FFR

@elizabethconley4996 8 ай бұрын

@@Eminem_ontopanybody who says ur racist for not liking black hoodies needs to grow up

@NattySJuegosyAnime Жыл бұрын

STOP, JUST STOP. There's nothing problematic with liking cute, feminine things. There shouldn't be an age limit to enjoy those things. This sounds like blaming women for the existence of pedos and assuming that women who have a feminine aesthetic mainly do it for male attention. It's ridiculous.

@SofiaCalotti Жыл бұрын

This! Lately I've seen more analyses (also on this channel) that are just easy/shallow takes about(/that blame) teen girls/gen z and tiktok. (I say this as a millenial). I think the take can do better.

@luciole6048 Жыл бұрын

Exactly! You are totally right. Thank you very much for your comment.

@psychoturtle509 Жыл бұрын

A lot of content is centered around icons like lana and kate moss. Have you heard half of lanas songs? They glorify so much messed up stuff.

@NattySJuegosyAnime Жыл бұрын

@@psychoturtle509 Yes, I've heard most of her songs. Have you heard mainstream pop, rap, reggaeton or metal? They glorify so much messed up stuff. So, it's important to educate teenagers not to let the media/social media become a bad influence for them. But it's unnecessary to demonize an artist (or aesthetic in this case) when people who enjoy them know to differentiate right from wrong

@HelenKendzia Жыл бұрын

@@psychoturtle509 there's something deeply wrong with expecting a female artist to also be a "good example" to girls instead of letting her write about her own personal experiences and feelings.

@lydiawalker0714 Жыл бұрын

When are we going to stop blaming women for attracting predatory men? Shame men for being creeps!

@pingidjit Жыл бұрын

This! A woman should be able to walk down the street naked and not be attacked. Bodies and clothing are NOT the problem. People (most commonly men) thinking they are entitled to what is NOT being offered is the problem.

@t.k7five084 Жыл бұрын

@@pingidjit ya I totally agree with statement. Expect for most common men part

@windseekervideo Жыл бұрын

Blaming could be harmful or helpful. Context matters.

@pingidjit Жыл бұрын

@@t.k7five084 Not sure how you disagree with it? Its statistical fact that most sex crimes are committed by men. Its not only men, but its mostly men.

@noelle1085 Жыл бұрын

@@t.k7five084 it is most commonly men though.

@ThelmainTokyo Жыл бұрын

Always women putting other women down…

@jasminerc3240 4 ай бұрын

This.

@KT-bc1ql Ай бұрын

Jealousy

@anonymouscoward9410 Ай бұрын

Everytime!

@audhumbla6927 12 күн бұрын

Yeah and when its "yt" women its apparently ok to say straight out that our literal skik color is a problem......... Even tho the style is literally extremly european. Why they hhate us so much

@ariis_sketchbook 9 күн бұрын

@@audhumbla6927frrr

@not_arabella3 Жыл бұрын

I don’t see any problem with dressing childish, cute or feminine clothes. The problem is when men sexualize u for dressing like that.

@tokiohotel_fan0 Жыл бұрын

It isnt our fault men are pigs (not all)

@Ninamonet 9 ай бұрын

Exactly. Society has a problem with blaming women because it's easier to blame women instead of blaming the source: men.

@ShrekIsLoveShrekIsLifee 9 ай бұрын

@@Ninamonetthe source is women who do it on purpose for attention

@aaaaaagggghhhhhhhh 8 ай бұрын

@@ShrekIsLoveShrekIsLifeebut then that should be the main issue, why bring the actual fashion aesthetic into it? It’s not like everyone who likes the aesthetic wants male attention. I know there are certain kinds of people who take it too far, and they glorify rlly harmful things- those should be the people we criticise, not the people just dressing for fashion.

@TyTrack_127 7 ай бұрын

They sexualize us with any style of clothes literally

@vlncentchan Жыл бұрын

not the misinformation about lolita fashion💀

@T0M1E__403 4 ай бұрын

Exactly, KZfaq shorts creators are always lying or spreading misinformation about dumb shit omfg..

@dani.1170 3 ай бұрын

right...

@T0M1E__403 3 ай бұрын

@@dani.1170 it’s misinformation period.

@dani.1170 3 ай бұрын

@@T0M1E__403 Did it sound like I was being sarcastic? My bad. It is misinformation and I agree

@user-bi1nl2mx6h 2 ай бұрын

It is in fact a pedo book

@Vixin24 Жыл бұрын

Wtf? I never heard of this trend but it sounds like my kind of thing. I love frills, ribbons, bows, cutesy things but I definitely am not doing it for men lol. If anything it's been a man repellent since most guys seem to like a sexier esthetic. Yeah pedos exist but jeez this just seems like finding problems with everything just for the sake of it.

@ForAnAngel Жыл бұрын

It seems to me like they're basing their whole outrage on the dictionary definition of coquette which is a very old word that is not being used in the same way as it was back then.

@jasminerc3240 4 ай бұрын

@@ForAnAngelfr

@jasminerc3240 4 ай бұрын

Exactly. Obviously pedos exist, but how can someone blame women dressing the way they want for that?! Women should be able to wear whatever they want without having to worry about men

@blurgle9185 3 ай бұрын

@@jasminerc3240people can do whatever they want. But if i go around in nazi attires, hailing people in public, I'm perpetuating a lifestyle and ideal that people will disagree with. If we look at these fashions and think of their origin, we associate this style with women having no independence, subservient to the needs and requirements of others, and so on. It will provoke because women fought hard to move away from Conservative ideals of women, and now we see affluent women returning to the old ways in terms of fashion but also lifestyle. It will provoke, you cant pretend or even expect that it won't. Life is like that.

@dani.1170 3 ай бұрын

exactly, and its usually women dressing liek this. PEDOS ARENT ATTRACTED TO WOMEN!!

@eepyru Жыл бұрын

I love coquette and this makes me so mad. Literally not once did I ever think “Oh I'm doing this for men” before jumping into a pretty little pink dress. I hate how people can NEVER leave us alone. You all must be sad. I just hate how a woman can't be hyper feminine without some people trying to bother her. I sometimes feel ashamed to tell people that I really like the coquette aesthetic because of how feminine yet elegant and artsy it is. I hate how people twist everything into something else. I can assure you most women don't do it for men. There will always be women who dress solely for men, but those girls aren't always the ones who like coquette. Also tired of people thinking that we're trying to act like little girls. Personally I'm not a fan of lolita myself, I like looking mature yet still feminine and cute but hey what's wrong with a grown women wanting to put on a cute dress? I don't know man, I hate this world.

@diahoney_ Жыл бұрын

EXACTLY, I'm into lolita a bit along with kawaii, I see kawaii content creators being called "an adult with a arrested development" or some dumb sh1t. it's just clothes ffs. not everybody wants to dress normally. the people who sēxualize this or make it seem weird are the problem, not us.

@ethiopiazoldyk4667 Жыл бұрын

@@diahoney_thank you. I'm so in love with the Japanese lolita aesthetic especially the gothic styles. I love dark colours and themes but in a cute way if you get what I'm saying 😂 Like Misa from death note. Everyone should be allowed to express themselves through their clothing

@diahoney_ Жыл бұрын

@@ethiopiazoldyk4667 fr! it's so annoying 😭

@ethiopiazoldyk4667 Жыл бұрын

@@diahoney_ but we won't let it ever stop us coquette girls from dressing how we want. Hahaha 😂🤗

@90ioel 11 ай бұрын

Honestly it’s so stupid like when you dress like an “adult woman” you’re sexualized cause you’re an adult woman and wear somewhat revealing or tight clothes and when you wear cute modest fashion like Lolita or something feminine and cute you’re sexualized cause you apparently “dress like a child” ban everything and embrace nudity atp

@Meganedere Жыл бұрын

I would not say the comparison of lolita fashion to coquette is fair. Lolita fashion is meant to be unapologetically, genuinely, and wholesomely girly in a world that expects compliance, insincerity, and sexuality, while coquette is very feminine but purposefully includes the sexy edge. Additionally, the origins of the lolita name is up for debate and is not necessarily based on the book.

@claracatlady9844 Жыл бұрын

@ADBH-sd8cz 7 ай бұрын

That's what I was trying to say but you explained it much better.

@cheezarose 7 ай бұрын

Lolita is just an actual old school Spanish name,you might find a grandma in the countryside with that name still.

@RavenSutcliffe 7 ай бұрын

@@cheezarosemy grandmother's name is Dolores, which is what Lolita is a nickname for. Heck, my MOTHER'S name is Dolores, it isn't even that old fashioned. If you read the novel, her mother named her that bc she became obsessed with Mexico during her honeymoon. But in Spain it doesn't necessarily have to be a grandmother and you don't have to go to the countryside to find one.

@dani.1170 3 ай бұрын

Lolita is a more innocent fashion, its whole style is based on puffy dresses, you cant be sexy with all that. Coquette is specifically supposed to have a daring sexy edge to it like you said. Lolita fashion doesn't come from the books and movie

@arloreynolds8794 Жыл бұрын

I AM a minor. I should be able to dress young and cutesy because if I dress older I’m “asking” for it. I’m literally and legally ALLOWED to have a young style

@satan4518 9 ай бұрын

Nobody says you aren’t. It’s the weird ass grown bitches who do it to roleplay “younger” for a weirdo. (Not all coquettes btw)

@yoshisarethebomb 8 ай бұрын

Yeah, kids and teens shouldn’t dress like s•xy adults or like business clothes they’re kids and teens

@Mandylol90 8 ай бұрын

@@yoshisarethebombWhat's wrong with business clothes? See that's the issue as well. Stop forcing kids to wear these "Unicorns and ponies", they can still be a child without having to wear all of that if they don't want to. Unless the clothing is saying "bitch", "slut", showing their buttocks, clothing is clothing.

@yoshisarethebomb 8 ай бұрын

@@Mandylol90 I didn’t know how to word it but yeah sorry

@Teagandamonkey 6 ай бұрын

It does not matter what age you are you can like any aesthetic,color

@manuluh_ Жыл бұрын

Just let them wear what they want. It's literally that easy.

@peawltea 11 ай бұрын

for real, y'all need to stop complicating everything oml.

@aprl4616 6 ай бұрын

Coquette is problematic.

@alexvang5639 6 ай бұрын

Literally. I couldn’t imagine being bothered by what others are wearing.

@sleepydemon516 5 ай бұрын

@@aprl4616 explain why

@jasminerc3240 4 ай бұрын

@@aprl4616no. Coquette is a style. People might be making it “problematic”, but that’s not the fault of the style. Coquette is dressing feminine, that’s LITERALLY it. People who are making it anything more than that for the worse are the problem.

@honeylizabeth2375 Жыл бұрын

The Lolita fashion's name doesn't come from Navokov's Lolita, ffs

@Marigen1971 Жыл бұрын

Where does it come from?

@winterbutterfly8861 Жыл бұрын

There are actually 2 Lolita aesthetics, one is the Japanese one, that is childish but in a more cutesy, Victorian, doll style. And then is the Nabokov one, portrayed in some of the clips they showed here. It is based in both the book and the films, especially the 1997 one, this aesthetic is also known as Nymphet, a term used in the book to describe a young girl (pre teen or young teen) who is considered to be sexually attractive. This aesthetic emulates the aesthetics of the female lead in the movie who's character is to be 12-13 years old.

@claracatlady9844 Жыл бұрын

Yes and no. The name does come from the book title but the way the book was interpreted in Japan is inherently different to the west, simply referring to an elegant, cute adolescent girl (or girly aesthetic) which resonated with the at the time popular style shōjo bunka. The Japanese version of the western interpretation of what a Lolita is would be Lolicon (coming from Lolita Complex, Russell Trainer's novel The Lolita Complex translated 1969)

@kalianlend749 Жыл бұрын

The Japanese name does come from the Nabokov novel though, so yes it does

@melethnin4714 Жыл бұрын

@@Marigen1971 the Japanese loli

@khadyadjisall5708 Жыл бұрын

No and just no there is a huge difference between Lolita fashion and Lolita book written by Nobokov (btw read it it's a really good book). this video is full of misinformation

@randomwhatever5403 8 ай бұрын

The amount of creepy pedophilic people who interpreted an anti-pedophila book you're supposed to be disturbed by as "sexy child seduces man in forbidden romance" is INSANE to me.

@khadyadjisall5708 8 ай бұрын

@@randomwhatever5403 Because you cannot read Lolita in a superficial way. It requires a lot of attention.

@jasminerc3240 4 ай бұрын

Exactly!

@Kalani_Saiko 2 ай бұрын

@@randomwhatever5403 frfr there are so many things that have been RUINED by people taking it the exact opposite way.

@pawkipu Ай бұрын

There is a lot of irony surrounding the Lolita controversy. Lolita by Nabokov encourages girls to be modest both in dress and behaviour. Dolores was not. This didn't directly result in Humbert's predation, but it payed a key role.

@tanya292 Жыл бұрын

Your misunderstanding of the Lolita fashion and it’s aesthetic and reasons was not appropriate or appreciated

@carlyshipman9722 Жыл бұрын

Most men just wanna see us in leggings that show off our ass, not cute frilly dresses. It's definitely not a fashion motivated by the male gaze. I heavily disagree with this take

@satan4518 9 ай бұрын

Have y’all not seen the uprise in “men” wanting “traditional” women that “dress like women” and wear “feminine clothing” (these are all things I’ve hear from these wanna be “alpha” male types). I’ve seen some women that gravitate to this aesthetic also because they think being a “trad” gf/ wife is cool and will appeal to these “provider” types. (Not all people in this aesthetic obviously)

@umopepisdn. 6 ай бұрын

@@satan4518there are definitely men who want that but women who wear it are not necessarily trad wives lol. I am studying to be a dental hygienist and I dress like this to class. I am a firm believer in women earning their own money and am fiercely independent but this is how I've dressed since I was a child and how I feel most myself. I gravitated towards it since before coquette or Lolita was even popular. I literally run from traditional men. A few nights ago I watched a sad movie and went to my boyfriend tearing up and he started crying too and said "why are we crying?" And that's the kind of man I love. Sensitive and empathetic. He cries because seeing me cry moves him to tears.

@Cloaded-kc4kq 5 ай бұрын

@@satan4518since you disagree with it means nobody should do it?

@donniecarpenter2662 4 ай бұрын

@@umopepisdn.this what they literally said

@bbibbi-nb5pl 4 ай бұрын

@@satan4518 and what about it? Does it offend you that not every woman has the same ideals as you?

@xx_iheartgirlz.mp3_xx Жыл бұрын

i love this style and i am a lesbian lmao i don't think anyone that follows the aesthetic does it for men, the beauty modern standard is totally different from this, and most men think this style is ridiculous. we do it for us, for the girlies

@h34rteyezz86 Жыл бұрын

as a lesbian who loves coquette too yes I agree with u wholeheartedly

@alexanderk.6869 Жыл бұрын

fr any kind of girly aesthetic is usually sapphic as hell

@pinkprincess444 11 ай бұрын

Yeahh like I'm just doing it by myself!! I don't even like men that much 😭

@recessimt1red 9 ай бұрын

frr, I'm a nonbinary lesbian and i dress for myself lmao

@emberyolremember9216 8 ай бұрын

There is definitely a connection to being lgbt+ and being attracted to child like styles…

@SugaryRoyaltea Жыл бұрын

Sweet lolitas : here we go again.. 💀

@Chinelolamb 8 ай бұрын

FR, they can never catch a break-

@clairobscur1413 Жыл бұрын

Please DO NOT put people who dress in the japanese Lolita fashion (which has absolutely nothing to do with the book or films) and people who try to dress like Dolores in the same basket 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

@Notjust-T Жыл бұрын

ppl who try to dress like dolores💀💀💀

@oldaccount746 9 ай бұрын

@@Notjust-Tif you already loved vintage fashion there's nothing wrong with taking inspiration from her outfits though.

@randomwhatever5403 8 ай бұрын

Also Dolores is not sexy, she isn't a "promiscuous sexy girl who wants to seduce grown men" shes a *child* the book is an antipedopholia book that a horror story of the depraved mind of degenerate. The fact that so many people interpreted and popularized dolores as "sexy" and somehow agree with the with the pedophile is gross🤮

@clairobscur1413 8 ай бұрын

@@randomwhatever5403 literally !!

@jasminerc3240 4 ай бұрын

@@randomwhatever5403THIS!

@Echo-cx2gk Жыл бұрын

"We regret to inform you that your aesthetic choices are misogynistic, actually."

@keishamorris5571 Жыл бұрын

There's nothing wrong for have a youthful look, as long as you like the look that suits you. Just don't do this look just for the attention to attract men.

@Echo-cx2gk Жыл бұрын

@Keisha Morris why not? I was thinking about that last bit of the video to "do it for the right reasons". Who's the one approving reasons for why women dress up the way they do? Why can't they dress up specifically to attract men? Did feminism just over correct back to shaming women for how and why they dress the way they do?

@winterbutterfly8861 Жыл бұрын

@@Echo-cx2gk agree, but if your choice of aesthetic is for attracting men AND includes dressing in a childish way (here I mean the Lolita/Nymphet, not the coquette one) then it should be problematic. But yes, I love hyper femenine things too and I use them whenever I feel like it 🩰

@tcrijwanachoudhury Жыл бұрын

@@winterbutterfly8861 Ok Stalin. How should said problematic girl be dealt with then? Being cancelled, bullied until they come to their senses? Let people live their lives, maybe you dont dress for men but some people do. It's not their jobs to appeal to your gaze and sensibilities, like it is not your job to appeal to theirs.

@winterbutterfly8861 Жыл бұрын

@@tcrijwanachoudhury what the heck are you talking about? Chill. Do you even know who Stalin was to call people that? When did I said anything about canceling or bullying anyone? I'm not the one calling people names, I've never bullied anyone in my life, not on-line, nor face to face. I stated my opinion and I stay in it, there is nothing wrong in dressing to attract men and there is nothing wrong with dressing in a childish way, but dressing in a childish way to attract men is weird because, what kind of man is that?. But if you do, that's on you, I won't go out of my way for it because it's not of my business. If you misunderstood what I said go read better before insulting people, and if you think I'm wrong then OK, good for you, I don't have a problem with that. I let people live their lives and have their own opinions without throwing dictators names around as if it's not serious stuff.

@mercedesgiorgi4048 Жыл бұрын

girls dress in a childish fashion and are appealing to p3dos, but men dress with superhero shirts and no one bats an eye. who’s responsible for sexualization here ?

@ayanabeads1614 Жыл бұрын

When are girls and women NOT sexualized?

@Aaron-kj8dv Жыл бұрын

Are they appealing to pedos or is that something people just say? I'm pretty sure pedos are attracted to children, not adults dressed as children.

@merlin9802 Жыл бұрын

@@ayanabeads1614've never seen the sexualization of women in politics.

@newnewz88 Жыл бұрын

even *school girl* outfits are sexualized 💀

@merlin9802 Жыл бұрын

@@newnewz88 no body wears the type of school girl outfits that are sexualized, do some research before you just asume

@wizardlover1324 Жыл бұрын

lolita fashion has nothing to do with the book. In the contrary, real lolita fashion has a lot of covering up and being feminine without having to show too much skin

@irenecorrea9149 Жыл бұрын

So then where does it get its name from?

@90ioel 11 ай бұрын

@@irenecorrea9149 not the book the original source of it is very hard to find but if you read the history of Lolita fashion it’ll take 0.1 seconds to figure out that the book is definitely not a source cause Lolita fashion is pretty much part of feminism in a way it’s supposed to be something that’s against sexualization and standards

@yoshisarethebomb 8 ай бұрын

@@irenecorrea9149the magazine that coined the term thought it was a cute word, which at the time was a trend to name things in English words Gyaru comes from gal, American slang for example

@pawkipu Ай бұрын

Ironically, it has everything to do with the book. Lolita fashion fans brag about "embracing their femininity and modesty," but flaunt immodest clothing and extravagant outfits. Mind you, this doesn't apply to everyone, and I'm aware of that. Dolores/Lolita in Nabokov's book practiced immodesty and fueled Humbert's obsession as a result, which is why he referred to her as a "demoness". The book taught young women modesty- don't be a coquette. Additionally, research literature terms before carelessly tossing them around. Girls and women are allowed to like things society deems feminine. However, attention seeking and mindless flirting (or flirting in general, depending on the severity,) are unacceptable. All of this could've been avoided if these influencers used their brains and picked up a dictionary.

@ventimelodies 20 күн бұрын

@@irenecorrea9149 people started calling the lolita fashion lolita because they thought the word was cute, not because the fashion is sexualized or made for predators

@beatricemckenna12 Жыл бұрын

so what? I have to change my aesthetic so I dont get gr00med? This is the definition of "you're asking for it"

@claracatlady9844 Жыл бұрын

The western understanding of what Lolita fashion is is so poor it hurts. For clarification; clothing subculture highly influenced by Victorian clothing and styles from the Rococo period, Alice in Wonderland etc. with a heavy focus on cuteness/Kawaii. Lolita fashion, if you’d know anything about it, is actually very covered up, little to absolutely no cleavage, lots of layers etc. The term “Lolita” in Japan came to be associated with cute girlish aesthetic (shōjo bunka), so unlike in the west came to be a positive synonym for the "sweet and adorable" adolescent girl, without a perverse or sexual connotation. Within Japanese culture the name refers to cuteness and elegance rather than to sexual attractiveness. Many lolitas in Japan are not aware that lolita is associated with Nabokov's book. The Japanese version of the western idea of what a “Lolita” is (sexually promiscuous adolescent girl etc.) would be “Lolicon” which comes from “Lolita Complex” (Russell Trainer's novel The Lolita Complex translated 1969) Nice addition from Wikipedia: “Lolita is seen as a reaction against stifling Japanese society, in which young people are pressured to strictly adhere to gender roles and the expectations and responsibilities that are part of these roles.Wearing fashion inspired by childhood clothing is a reaction against this. This can be explained from two perspectives. Firstly, that it is a way to escape and to go back to the eternal beauty of childhood.[94][95] Secondly, that it is an escape to a fantasy world, in which an ideal identity can be created that would not be acceptable in daily life.”

@fatimam.n.7042 Жыл бұрын

This comment needs to be pinned!! Exactly! Lolita fashion comes from Japan where it is literally considered the opposite of secy.

@goodmorning2386 Жыл бұрын

very well said here! I came on to comment a similar thing, but you out it better than I could

@FutureMD533 Жыл бұрын

Couldn’t have said it better

@ina_is_still_not_here_ 6 ай бұрын

Finally someone who knows

@nohotdog463 Жыл бұрын

I’m so glad the comments here have some sense.

@diorsfavour 6 ай бұрын

RIGHT

@FunkinSystem 5 ай бұрын

REAL

@flamingoisepic5002 Жыл бұрын

Just because skinny white girls participate in a trend doesnt mean that poc cant. Nobody ever said that.

@hime.gyaruu 11 ай бұрын

yeah there’s so many asian and black coquette girls who look absolutely stunning, it’s not exclusive to white girls!

@slytherinlady3907 6 ай бұрын

true, also that’s so fucking weird to say? almost, y’know, lil bit racist

@sharkvinny 5 ай бұрын

people have definitely said that

@sharkvinny 5 ай бұрын

@@slytherinlady3907 maybe if u, y'know, actually read what the video said, you would notice they are calling out yt coquette girls who romantacize grooming and exclude poc

@slytherinlady3907 5 ай бұрын

@@sharkvinny name the part in the video where they mention that this excludes poc, they literally just say that the trend is popular with skinny white girls, also “romanticizing grooming” BE SERIOUS RN

@livingdeadgirl5 10 ай бұрын

You sound like the kind of person to say "Well what were you wearing?" when someone tells you that they were assualted

@maritamussner1230 Жыл бұрын

Please leave Lolita Fashion out of this. It has nothing to do with the book. There is also a aesthetic that is inspired by the movie adaptations of that book, which is probably what you mean. This trend is definitely problematic. Lolita Fashion on the other Hand is the complete opposite. It is meant as a fashion only for the wearer, and not as something to attract men. It is just unapologetic hyper feminity on steroids.

@randomwhatever5403 8 ай бұрын

The movies are fucked up soooo much. The books a disturbing Horror Story about the mind of a depraved person, and then the movies try to downplay The Grooming and abuse to make it more palatable and then interpreted lolita as "a sexy child is seducing the grown man in a Forbidden Love story" because they found catering to pedophiles with more profitable. LOLITA IS NOT A LOVE STORY ITS A HORROR STORY!! If you think dolores was sexy, and aren't disturbed and recognizing his insane disconnect from reality, your a pedo! Like im so sick of it. So I guess lolita story and Japanese fashion have something in common, gross pedophiles seeing girlness and childishness as sexy when its not at all.

@sheluvssmokedupeyes1 7 ай бұрын

That part

@inyowalls Жыл бұрын

Why is it always"thin white women" to blame? What does your race and size have to do with you like? Most of the people insulting these "thin white women" are just insecure about their own size😐

@ariis_sketchbook 6 ай бұрын

I know right, they said they hate how coquette girls are white and skinny but who cares. You barely ever see people saying an aesthetic is only for skinny white girls. If they want to, even if you aren’t thin and white you can be the aesthetic too, no one said otherwise. Sometimes people just make up random problems out of nothing

@inyowalls 6 ай бұрын

@@ariis_sketchbook Completely agree. I'm an Indian girl, and I'd not call myself thin, causes I have an hourglass shape and I can assure these people that pedophiles are not attracted to childish clothes, they're attracted to literal children who are physically underdeveloped.

@anonymouscoward9410 Ай бұрын

Honestly shaming people for being white is also racist smh

@laural4431 Жыл бұрын

I’m sorry but the lolita fashion is completely unrelated with lolita the book

@artemisvsvenus Жыл бұрын

Gothic Lolita fashion from Japan is not the same as the book. Gothic Lolita fashion was meant to copy the look of Victorian dolls. The subculture focuses on manners as well

@randomwhatever5403 8 ай бұрын

Also in case you don't know (I say this because as a young lolita I didn't know for a long time) the book is actually a very much anti-pedo book, but creepy people decided to misinterpreted it as "sexy child seduces man in forbidden love story" because they themselves are creeps and related to the pedophile.

@daydreamerjim6603 Жыл бұрын

I feel like taking the google definition of a word and ascribing the same meaning to an aesthetic with the same name is kind of a very shallow look at the topic...

@alicesvoidx 11 ай бұрын

real!! stargirl fasion isnt being a mf star, and coquette is tryna get male attention

@diesonneisthedude2668 2 ай бұрын

Yeah rigt its so dumb!

@kimberlyrichardson8760 Жыл бұрын

Don’t confuse coquette which means flirt with the story of Lolita. Completely different.

@randomwhatever5403 8 ай бұрын

Yeah, as lolita is a very much antipedopholia book. Acting like its about "promiscuous girls" futhers the pedophilic misinterpretations. Btw they also showed Japanese lolita fashion for the example and that isn't even named in relation to the book, it was named for the same reason the pedo "named" dolores that, because lolita was an already existing name the was about youthfulness and cuteness and stuff.

@pawkipu Ай бұрын

Not different. Dolores' flirting and enticement (which is why Humbert calls her a "demoness") is what leads to Humbert's overly passionate obsession with her. Modesty is important.

@darlingdream Жыл бұрын

Yeah bad take

@viviqnnn 11 ай бұрын

BRO. it’s just an aesthetic 😭 no one INTENDED for any of this to happen.

@tcrijwanachoudhury Жыл бұрын

Wow, we really blaming women for how they dress? That's a little backwards. Let people dress how they want. People are obsessed with telling women how to be.

@beauteoussounds1156 Ай бұрын

Plus, there’s a very small window someone can do this, age-wise, without being off-putting (think “Whatever Happened to Baby Jane.” Not cute.) So let people do what they want without judgment, fercryingoutloud.

@Steph-gl4sk Жыл бұрын

Considering how thoughtful and considerate this channel has been to many female-centered tropes and media, it's so disheartening to see y'all conflate lolita fashion with lolita the book. As a feminist western channel, I would recommend y'all to educate yourselves on the role lolita fashion/lifestyle plays in the lives of the Japanese women who use it to rebel against their patriarchal society.

@Adoesntknowauser Жыл бұрын

Omg girl😭 nooo it’s not their fault men sexualize this and also there are toxic coquette girlies who romanticize Lolita but that’s not all of them coquette is being feminime and frilly socks and cutesy things don’t belong to only children coquette isn’t sexualizing things rather being flirty in a cutesy hopeless romantic way not in a weird creepy way

@Danny2k34 Жыл бұрын

Giving "Lets find a problem with every little thing" type of vibes

@mia-is8hb Жыл бұрын

No, you aren't right girl. You're speaking like all the girls with coquette style just want men attention, that's not true, it's just a style that girls feels comfortable with I love being feminine and all those stuff but i never wanted men attention for doing this, i just feel pretty this way

@s00ki.e Жыл бұрын

STOP BLAMING WOMEN PLEASE OMG ! Let women do what they want.

@TyTrack_127 7 ай бұрын

Ikrr The haters of this are probably who are too scared to wear more feminine and need attention of men. Boring people who just known to dress casually

@dustyfairywingstoo Жыл бұрын

I love you guys but the summary you gave for Lolita fashion here was a real misfire. It's 2023 and this fashion has been around since at least the 90s and there's SO MANY resources online explaining its history, aesthetic inspirations, and stylistic intent of the fashion. Even if it's just for a KZfaq short, that's not an excuse for the glaring lack of research here.

@vampiraa__ 7 ай бұрын

Man, Lolita fashion and the book lolita are two very different things😭

@bookkitty Жыл бұрын

Lolita fashion has nothing to do with the book. It was created in defiance of the trend to dress to attract men, instead to dress to please the wearer only. To be frilly, cute and modest.

@rosea2350 Жыл бұрын

You showed a girl wearing Japanese Lolita style which has no connection to the book Lolita.

@casperthenotsofriendlyghos8968 Жыл бұрын

Please stop spreading false information about the clothing style called Lolita. It has nothing to do with the book Lolita. Lolita style clothing is all about mimicking Victorian or rococo style fashion. It is modernized time period fashion.

@tokiohotel_fan0 Жыл бұрын

⚠️I AM LOVING THE WAY I DRESS IM NOT DOING IT FOR MENS ATENTION!!!⚠️

@sanasarwat8882 Жыл бұрын

Am I missing something here? Where is it indicated that any of these women are doing anything for men and not just feeling themselves and looking gorgeous? I'm not on tiktok so maybe I'm missing some context. But it seems anything young women do is "problematic". Maybe it's not the women who are "problematic", maybe it's the grown ass trash who are sexualizing minors.

@sharkvinny 5 ай бұрын

ppl are specifically talking ab the women who dress coquette AND act childish to gain the attention of certain men. this video was super bad explaining it

@iasminaraujo7109 Жыл бұрын

Lolita fashion has different origen

@IAteYourLastCake Жыл бұрын

Aight lolita FASHION is not the lolita book. The lolita book is super creepy but lolita fashion is just a subculture that originated in harajuku, Japan. It is based on rococo and Victorian fashion while also using modern fairytale based elements. Lolita fashion was not made to appeal to men, it was more of a feminist movement because many people at the time (and nowadays tbh) dislike and shun anything that is seen as unusual. Not appealing to men is also one of the reasons why lolita fashion places importance on modesty. Dressing in things that are considered “childish” does not equal to trying to appeal to predators, it is not their fault that some men are creepy f*cking pedos.

@Gardenpartyi78 Жыл бұрын

I'm a very coquette girlie girl but the whisper thing and romanticising eating disorders and mental illness is an extremely dangerous thing i was into all of those pins on Pinterest nd it was terrible I used to have a skinny unhealthy body and I started romanticising this then I truly started feeling very very weak nd now I'm struggling with anemia and so many other issues sometimes I can't even get out of the bed I'm trying to gain weight I'm trying to eat i used to eat one meal in a day nd my mental state was soooo bad..... I'm feeling much much better thanks god 💞pls don't cause harm to ur self to feel some aesthetic and trust me being over skinny is not beautiful the most beautiful body shape is the healthiest I STILL love coquette aesthetic tho 💌

@embroideredragdoll Жыл бұрын

Thank you for bringing this up, I think the style is very pretty but I absolutely despise the community because my only exposure to it was Pinterest, cringe whisper posts and all.

@feonaarabellaparaiso1786 Жыл бұрын

Honestly, I have found women gravitating towards these styles more-so as non-apologetically indulging in things they are hyper feminine. In this world, we’re taught from an early age that being feminine is “deviant from the norm” and “not taken seriously” or to emulate those traits is shameful. After all, how many women’s suits borrow more and more from masculine tailoring in order to portray a serious tone that garners respect? The majority do. Because let’s face it, in order to gain certain respects in your career, casting off your femininity was seen as necessary. However, as the economy worsens and our actions are not rewarded proportionally to the sacrifices made… women are now choosing to do whatever they want. What better way to say “F You” to this world, to instead embrace that hyper feminine style and being unapologetically woman in a world that sees us as others?

@thefoxindora Жыл бұрын

i want to be coquette for myself tbh

@nelly9080 Жыл бұрын

It really has nothing to do with men, women started saying woman who are femenine wants male attention because they do not feel femenine themselves. They are sad and mad that they don’t look or go close to feel femenine so they started calling out other women to feel better about them being like they are. Women who don’t feel femenine enough bring down other women that are in touch with being girly and femenine

@imdizzy6182 Жыл бұрын

there’s so much i could say about this. lolita is not just a trend. it’s a japanese fashion culture with 0 roots in the book or film. dressing cutesy doesn’t mean you’re opening yourself up to pedos

@1dk.1dc Жыл бұрын

*lolita fashion is different from lolita* .the fashion was named that was because they thought the word sounded nice they didn’t know about the book while naming it I HATE PEOPLE SPREADING FALSE INFORMATION

@calebmarmon1310 Жыл бұрын

Clueless non-Tik-Tok-er here. Are all of these trends going on simultaneously or am I witnessing the birth and death of rapid trends in real time?

@FlyFox_Art Жыл бұрын

Well, lets start with the fact this video gets the fashions wrong in general. I just stopped it after they claimed lolita fashion had to do with the book. It's miss information. And not exactly, lolita fashion has been around for a while(atleast the early 2000s) and the other one is a rebrand name for an aesthetic that sprung up from people liking the styling of the character Dolores in the 90s Lolita movie adaptation. Both are not that new, I'm not sure if the second one was there since the movie came out or the 2010s. Anyway, the pandemic made all kinds of fashions and hobbies boom bc ppl had time to discover them.

@witchingbrew3 Жыл бұрын

here we go again with another company or channel using Lolita street fashion from Japan WRONG.

@Femcel11 8 ай бұрын

White womens are aloud to dress as they desire and do as they please 🦄⭐️🧚🏻‍♂️

@lc5929 Жыл бұрын

This video is so insulting

@dacringeyfangirl Жыл бұрын

LOLITA FASHION HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE BOOK

@yumi9579 Жыл бұрын

So who tell we love pink and coutteqe stuff just for men ? 🤡

@ella.44uuu Жыл бұрын

Idc what this aesthetic means, I just like how it looks and what vibes it gives me. the Coquette aesthetic just brings me comfort, and nostalgia

@redrose3089 Жыл бұрын

I don’t even care what this is saying Im just loving the outfits in the backround their so cute 😊

@BioshadowX Жыл бұрын

Ah yes, this is the trend, of all trends, that we need to be concerned about sexualizing youth. Uh huuuh

@ave3926 Жыл бұрын

This is ridiculous

@Carlita7054 11 ай бұрын

But why should I be shamed for liking feminine clothes based on the possibility of an underlying ulterior motive SOME PEOPLE possess? Let people dress up in peace

@sanraii Жыл бұрын

the problem isnt the people who are dressing that way, its those who are sexualizing it☠️

@leahrose5401 Жыл бұрын

What about educating men (just saying)

@Tttt28882 Жыл бұрын

Chill. Coquette is just a trend inspired on stereotyped cute girly French stuff! If there is a problem, that would be stereotyping a culture… But as long as French ppl (specially women) are fine with this, guess what: it’s not of your business! Again… Chill!

@Dhnswh 10 ай бұрын

Pedophiles are attached to children not a grown person in a child like clothing

@strawberycupcake 10 ай бұрын

the lolita style DOES. NOT. HAVE. ANYTHING. TO. DO. WITH. THE. BOOK. I am SO sick and tired of ppl saying it does. it's just japanese fashion.

@St4rlight.luvs_eggs Жыл бұрын

Y’all. It’s just a way people dress.. LITERALLY HOW DOES IT SUPPORT GROOMING AND SMOKING?… Your allowed to listen to music even if the creator is problematic. It’s not that deep

@diahoney_ Жыл бұрын

exactly, just don't support the creator

@St4rlight.luvs_eggs Жыл бұрын

@@diahoney_ fr

@celestxial 8 ай бұрын

This is misinformation

@lexibrooker6652 9 ай бұрын

People creating an excuse to not be the only person to randomly hate a style 💀💀 :

@vocexseta Жыл бұрын

I can like things without thinking of men at all. What men do or don't do isn't on us.

@Hurrhurrrrnaurrrr2 7 ай бұрын

M8 don’t even associate Lolita fashion with the book 💀 In the words of the wise lovely lor : “they are not. The same.”

@sarahd4639 Жыл бұрын

I fr thought you said the new aesthetic was “coke head”

@nekrataali Жыл бұрын

That was in the 90s IIRC.

@fortyshorty2459 Жыл бұрын

LITERALLY SAME😭😭😭

@gwenndolyncampbell1560 Жыл бұрын

Your critique of Lolita fashion comes from an incorrect assumption about the origins and meaning of the subculture. Lolita arose initially from a subversion of the male gaze and also a subversion of Japanese culture emphasizing marriage and motherhood as the only routes into adulthood for girls. Lolita fashion and sub-groups has changed some in the 25+ years since it gained popularity, but The Take made a big mistake in simplifying a complex subculture, with roots in a different country and social background, into an analogue for white TikTok users wearing short skirts and supposedly romanticizing relationships with older men.

@perrip2355 Жыл бұрын

I’m a lesbian who prefers to wear the coquette style💜💗I’m not trying to please men,not women either. Just trying to please myself by wearing things I like.

@mirukusheki Жыл бұрын

Lolita 👏 was 👏 not 👏 named 👏after 👏 the book 👏 If you think it is, you're part of the problem. I hate it when Westerners insert their own interpretation into the origin of Lolita fashion. And, if anything, coquette's closest j-fashion relative is actually gyaru, specifically the himekaji style. Didn't y'all do any research at all? 🙄

@Lostbeams Жыл бұрын

Listen, I love the aesthetic but even so, they aren’t just doing it for men’s attention, they just like the fashion also Lolita fashion should not even be mentioned in this, let people wear whatever, who cares if they are attention seekers or not.

@Coconut_milkkk 8 ай бұрын

this chic don’t even have an idea what coquette is- 💀

@hanscheesecake3134 7 ай бұрын

Being Coquette girl after seeing this video and not gonna lie but what was the actual point of wasting your life to make this?. We do what we do for the benefit of our health and it's showing ourselves that we love ourselves better than anyone could. Please don't silly comments about how others dress.

@raeganb18 Жыл бұрын

oh my lord, not everything revolves around men, the idea that women cant dress any way they pick or choose because all of it centers towards men annoys the shit out of me, not everything has to be problematic, so stop trying to make it that way- pedophiles do not prey on young women / women dressing as children, they prey on actual children. oh and let me add that the lolita fashion has nothing to do with the lolita film. as well as the fact that nobody is excluding our beautiful black girls from the coquette community.

@aesthetix3398 Жыл бұрын

What’s wrong with with wanting the attention of men? And also can you stop shaming these people for wearing what they want.

@ChristinaCandy-wv9cn 11 ай бұрын

Girls dress what you want as long as it’s covering a decent amount, but also carry pepper spray and a taser😊

@turkoizdog Жыл бұрын

Coquette is what everyone thinks Lolita is. Typically Lolita is about being over the top in girliness, particularly because men *don't* like it. It's dressing for women, not for men. Coquette, on the other hand, is girliness for the male gaze. This is exactly why so much Lolita is now called EGL.

@Notjust-T Жыл бұрын

coquette is typically styled for the male base but many of not most coquette girls do it bc they like it

@umopepisdn. 6 ай бұрын

I think both are fine. Let's stop pointing fingers here. I'm a girl and I like to wear both

@driftingdandelion 12 күн бұрын

the men you are referring to who “don’t like when women dress girly” are NOT attracted to women and are homosexuals 😂

@Porter_grace 9 ай бұрын

I’ve been a coquette girl since I was in 5th grade, and people putting the aesthetic the wrong way hurts me :( why can’t we all just let people dress how they want and not hate on them?

@justablink4307 Жыл бұрын

Well I just like dresses, laces and pearls so I love coquette aesthetic IDC about anything else Also don't get me started about white, skinny and bows and ribbons, and smooking and gr০০ming sht.. some emo girls can wear all black still be gaslighted and groomed if they aren't smat enough to understand it. It's depends on THEIR brain not on the dresses and aesthetic. Aesthetic is how you present yourself it doesn't define your knowledge of personality

@embroideredragdoll Жыл бұрын

But let’s be honest here, there are a concerning amount of people in the community that do in some way promote these things.

@Ivyinterrupted 8 ай бұрын

As a coquette girl I love the style because of the femininity of it! So yeah nothing creepy

@chemicalstarr Жыл бұрын

me when i lie.

@hihi615 11 ай бұрын

Its the fact that being feminine is automatically associated with being childish/child-like for me....

@annejohnson5875 Жыл бұрын

Maybe this subject needs a longer video.

@kimberlyrichardson8760 Жыл бұрын

And a more accurate video.

@OPAL_ISAMONKE 10 ай бұрын

WHAT LOLITA IS A FORM OF JAPANESE SUBCULTURE AND HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE FILM 😨😭

@jvlarrieu Жыл бұрын

Is it ever ok for women to do anything to attract men, or is it always “problematic”?

@iambora. 9 ай бұрын

As a youth, I don’t give a crap. If these women like dressing cute they can, to be honest, children don’t even dress like that nowadays. We wear sweats, hoodies, and converse mainly. Not “cutesy items” like dresses, doll shoes, and pigtails. So I don’t mind if they want to look childish.

@diesonneisthedude2668 2 ай бұрын

Nah for real ! Everyday when i go to work i see teenagers going to school and thats literally just it! Sweatpants and hoodies , sometimes with a crop top... Oh and a lot of grey. But maybe thats just in my area. Lol

@user-yh9bc8cw2w 11 ай бұрын

why cant we just let women enjoy being women? :(

@VitórieChess Жыл бұрын

It's not a "feminine" style (in the unprotected and naive sense) but a CLASSIC CHILDREN'S/JUVENILE style. The "feminine" style we can consider without the ultra-stereotype of delicacy, its CASUAL/wild legs style