I had the same issue for years. It would take a weekend to clean enough to have someone over. I'm not finished my decluttering, but I've made a lot of progress. It is so freeing to be able to have someone come over on short notice now and know the house is tidy. Don't give up. It took time to get here, but you can do it.

@@cmak1212 thank you for the encouragement!

I am in exactly the same spot as you. I have been shifting my views and habits for awhile now (thanks to Cas, Dana K White, Dawn from the Minimal mom and others) and slowly changing my home. I used to be so discouraged when I would go to those womens’ homes; now I still have anxiety over it but I choose to be inspired by their spaces and the way they approach “stuff” and curating their home. It gives me a little boost and something tangible to work towards. I am light years away from where I want to be, but also light years from where I started! You can do it!!!

It takes a lot of courage to state that. You are most definitely not alone. The support of these online communities is great. I’m just shifting now and you can too!❤

My heart goes out to you. I wish there was some way we could help each other.

I wish there was a podcast that talked about our journey - the emotional bond we have with generations of belongings and mementos. Clutterbug : are you listening? Help us!

Sometimes you can take a picture of the thing. Way less space needed to store a photo than a ‘thing’.

I have to say I've been a victim of oh I'll just sell this but the reality of his I don't have the time nor energy to do so so now I've shifted to I will donate this to an organization that will price it at a way they can get money out of or someone finds it and gets a surprisingly happy deal on a Saturday thrift.

❤agree‼

I agree! This has been huge for me.

That is so important. Not only for decluttering but for so many other things in life. For example, I had less white hairs when I was younger but I also had more acne!! 😅 enjoy each season!

My mom is a hoarder too. Now she is giving me the stuff she doesn't want anymore but makes sure I'm not throwing it away or giving the items to charity. I wait a while to make sure she has forgotten and then dispose of the items. She did call the other day to tell me not to get rid of some thing that she saw in a thrift store because they were asking $40 for it. Goodness a whole $40.

Great post. I'm not familiar with St Vincent de Paul but the Habitat for Humanity ReStore was incredibly useful in my decluttering process. I would bring in old tools and small furniture and watch how this charity helped others when I saw a young couples shop for discounted furniture or customers leave with a shovel or some tools,. Habitat also sent a truck to pick up furniture I was unable to fit in my car. This is definitely a charity I would recommend checking out if you have one in your area.

I remember the T-shirt phase! Every time we went to the mall we came home with another T-shirt. Finally I asked her, "How many T-shirts is enough?" Both she and I didn't know what to say.

@TubeYou21 cass actually has done that on the main Clutterbug channel!

That is what is helping me get rid of my stuff. I like to think that someone else will appreciate it and use it while I only kept it hidden in a closet.

😢

Just earlier this morning I spotted some casserole dishes I bought at a flea market only because they matched my dishes. They have only been used for display, never for cooking. I have plenty of casserole dishes for cooking. They will be boxed up for missions donation today. Cass you did a lovely job speaking with these kind ladies. There is no shame in putting worth and value in our emotional well being. Thank you so much and for being honest about your own decluttering journey.

@@juliatepe5760Good for you,I have a hard time “breaking up a family” 🤭😫😂🤣😅

You could maybe wait until your own house is a disaster zone, then invite her over to hang out amid the mess without a word of apology or embarrassment. She may start to realise that a messy house isn't some kind of moral failing, and that you won't judge her.

You have permission! Seriously, if an item isn't serving you, send it on its way! If the giver's intentions were pure, then they will be glad to know it's going to someone who will actually enjoy it. If it came with strings attached, all the more reason to ditch that toxic object!

The real man for you will accept your challenges and support you through them versus criticize you. I thought the same thing, and was terrified but they are out there and my relationship is proof! When I first started dating my BF and discovered his place was along the minimalist lines I was terrified to let him near my place. I always made excuses to go to his place vs mine. Over time he began to question it. I told him I liked to go to his place cause I felt like I was at Hotel M each time I visited cause it was so relaxing. He said my home should do the same for me and if it didn’t he’d be happy to help. Eventually I trusted him to let him in and he didn’t balk once. He accepted me - all of me (and my stuff) and as our relationship gets stronger I clearly see I don’t need the stuff. I used to garage sale and thrift to fill my time (and my home). Now we gather experiences and memories together versus stuff. Best thing ever!!!

Wow! That was mean!

I have a friend that let her adult son move back in and once threw his stuff out the window since he wouldn't pick it up. I was horrified but secretly had fantasies of doing the same with my older sons🤭🤭🤭😂😂

First of all, my dear, give yourself a break! This kind of thing IS hard, especially when you're looking back over a lifetime of memories, both yours and loved ones. Your daughter will eventually have to deal with that, too, when you no longer have need of any physical possessions. You can lessen any potential guilt for her by emphasising now that the relationships in your life are far more important than things. Write her a long, loving letter about your memories of her, and assure her that she doesn't have to keep anything in your house that isn't special or useful to her. Take pictures of items that have sentimental value to you, and write down what you remember about them eg who bought it, what it was used for, any funny stories etc. This will be a wonderful heirloom to pass on to your descendants without having to store and maintain the actual items. It also makes a great new tradition, as others can add their own pictures and stories to the record. Reach out to your local churches for help in decluttering as well as charities, even if you're not religious yourself, as they will have a community wide network and be most likely to know where an item will do the most good. They can also organise things like yard sales, or help you clean up any spaces that have been cleared out. They'll jump at the chance to do good on such a large scale, trust me!

Please come to my house!! I'm close to completely decluttering the main areas, but the office/hobby is still entertaining Fantasy ME. Lol

@@northstar4851 Would if I could.

This is a new channel just for podcasting! Don't worry, my regular Cluttebug channel won't have podcast episodes on it!

I love this Podcast channel, your pod casts are amazing.