Has given*

Give financial advice not marriage advice, or change the name of the show. Dude kept prying in the woman's business that she didn't want to talk about.🤡🤡🤡

Mr. Ramsey and Dr. John, the advice you give these wives doesn't sound remotely close to the biblical model for marriage. You sow the seeds of enmity in the heart of the wife towards her husband and you undermine the husband by not supporting the authority he has in the biblical model for marriage. If your advice is meant to be secular you need to let the callers and your audience know that is your position.

VernonU your living in the wrong century man

That would make this the Jerry Springer show not the Dave Ramsey show😂

Yes I'd love to get an update in a year.

Yes....that would be great to know what the results were!

Yes that would be sooo good

This is excellent idea! I often wonder 'where are they now'.

You don’t want to know.

BUT, you might come to the realization that you are better off without him.

@@lindap.p.1337 that doesn’t erase the majority of a decade you have spent building your life with another person. Totally, do what’s right but we only get so many decades. Realizing the love of your life doesn’t feel the same is crushing, there’s no getting around that.

​@@abbiemarie19 if the feeling isn't mutual than it means that person was never the love of your life. People forget that they can feel strongly for someone, but they can always move on and feel even deeper for someone who feels the same. When they find that, all of that time with someone else completely erases

Also why don't you love him enough to love with him for a better opportunity? If I had a chance to move to a different city and get a free house with 4 properties that going to be passive income, and my wife says no. I would think she wouldn't want what best for the family and think about leaving too

@@javanburton you missed the point. When someone tells you they are going to move to another state with or without you that means they really don’t care if you go. Marriage is over. Those words wouldn’t be spoken in my marriage because my marriage is a strong partnership. And if they ever were I would know something was extremely wrong. My husband wants to go everywhere with me, and I with him. That was the point of the comment. Even if she did want to go and support him it seems he could care less either way.

😂😂😂😂

😂😂😂

I'm literally dying laughing! 🤣

💀😂😅😂😅

Lol

oh.. man.. I felt this.

She doesn’t want t9 leave her job... in a male-dominated field. It is likely she has a “work husband”. This is all hinged on her job. No one is attached to a job, they are attached to the people they work with.

​@@katiejon17 I disagree. Some people have careers they love that are male dominated. Engineering, finance, etc.

@@73cidalia clearly my point was not that some people have careers in male-dominant fields that they love, but rather that she is choosing this specific job and location (not relocating and getting new employment in her field) over her own family. It’s likely because she is having an affair with a coworker. It’s either than or she loves her job more than her family. Either way, she’s no good.

​@@katiejon17 She said she's interviewing for different jobs in Atlanta. How does this "work husband" narrative of yours fit? It doesn't.

Real wisdom right here 👍

True. Respect and communication lead to everything else.

Agreed, but he probably had it saying it 50 million times...lol

@@pkal244 💯💯💯

I'm a big fan of the show. I've NEVER seen this anywhere else. This is extremely illustrative for anyone, whether you are in a relationship or not.

@kaz z LOL

You are RIGHT.

Spiritually, they are in hibernation.

two words - sexless marriage

She's a feminist. What do you expect?

You already have, he's sick of his wants being completely ignored and everything being about her. You can tell by the way she answers.

He doesn't want to be with her anymore ..

In a lot of these relationship/marriage questions, I wish we heard both sides. I understand why we can't. But the truth is usually somewhere between the two stories.

Maybe he just wants to give up on city life. Maybe he wants to re gear their lives. She clearly wants a big job. I also would lo e to hear his side!

It does not matter he wants out.

lol He is going to get banged up for sure

Yep should have divorced her before he inherited the properties

Tennessee has no fault divorces.

Gotta love marriage huh.

@@melindaunknown6411 No fault divorce is for when two people agree to go their separate ways amicably, which this woman is obviously not going to do if she can get 2.5 houses out of it now.

Callers with marriage issues always try to make themselves look like the victim and the other the villan.

Theres allllllllways more to the story

That, and she has the opportunity to live in Chattanooga instead of Atlanta. So yeah, there's definitely more to it.

Or maybe she doesn’t want to stop working? Just because you have life made and you could retire early doesn’t mean everyone wants to sit at home collecting money just waiting to die. You’ll become miserable very quickly. If my wife and I have more than enough income to stop working our jobs at 35. If we ever settled down and stopped our jobs we would be going nuts as would most.

Yep. These guys do not understand women. She wants power and authority in the relationship he is giving it to her by leaving.

That was my thought, too. He already has her replacement lined up. I don't know how she could miss that ice cold "invitation," but he clearly expects her to get the message.

My soon to be ex was dumb about his ultimatum. He told me specifically he wanted to California to be with his girlfriend and if I didn't come he would let the house foreclose (we have a kid so I'd end up stuck if we moved too). I just flat told him, go ahead and bye. (He changed his mind because she dumped him and was shocked I wasn't changing my mind about the divorce) 🙄

@@jessicaolson490 good choice. Keep the faith in yourself & life.

Good for him.

@David Kopp a husband should not commit adultery.

@tahoemist98: Railroad men, bounty hunters and Deke Thornton?

Thank you this way exact thought too.

Tam712, I couldn't agree more.

Mind reading isn't a thing.

She said "my career, my opportunities". He's not grieving, he's been replaced by "her career"

She's got her head in the sand and wants to blame everything else for his ultimatum other than that something has happened to put such a strain in her marriage that he's done screaming at her to help him fix the problem. People don't just wake up one day and say "I'm going to give the love of my life an ultimatum."

Oh jus sounds like a typical woman to me..good for him! I wanna move back to Nevada where I'm from im having the same issue with my girlfriend not wanting to leave her comfort zone n take a chance

And it is completely fine if they can solve it on their own

It means doing the 1 thing women can't stand, taking responsibility.

@@spongymcfonsworth , My ex husband had this love for his animals and expect me to live in a zoo. All my pleas and reasoning, he would not listen!! people can be stuck in their ways, not necessary evil. I have no choice, divorced him and move on. I have remarried 3 years ago to a wonderful man that is so much alike to my values.

H Yim and then you’re stuck there if you have kids.

Right! If he doesn't love her enough to sit down and discuss this, without caring if she comes or not, she'll end up leaving what she has behind and getting divorced shortly after moving.

Yeah to me it seems like you’d only ask in this way because you want them to not go. Years ago I was offered an opportunity in another city and I asked my wife, girlfriend at the time, if she wanted to go. I told her if she didn’t want to go that I’d turn down the job. It would have never occurred to me just tell her I was going and she could come along if she wants.

That is sad 😢. I hope she landed on her feet.

Texas has great divorce laws.

She sure wasn't!!

Absolutely in denial !

She is. And she didn't want to hear it-from her spouse nor Dave & John.

Right. They've already been through counseling.

@Brian Waller 🤯🤯🤯

@Brian Waller Wait that was your wife in the video? If so she didn't mention all of that.

@@traceford4904 I NEED TO KNOW TOO!

Brian Waller I’m sure that she would probably give anything to be a healthy, successful, working member of society. Unfortunately, that’s the thing about illness-it strikes whoever and whenever. Do you suppose she already knows you view her as a burden? She probably just spends most of her days thinking-waiting for the moment when you walk out. If it were me, I would prefer that you get it over and done with. Anything is better than being viewed with contempt.

Yeah, that was bizarre. Shouldn't that be the first priority?

Agree. They flew by that. Pretty big thing!

Staying in a broken marriage solely for the benefit of the child does NOT benefit the child. Dave was right in asking about the health of their marriage, especially because the caller seemed to be ignoring that critical factor.

@@username00009 Actually, it has pretty much been proven that keeping the marriage together for the child DOES benefit the child! Unless there is violence in the marriage, parents should put themselves second and wait until their kids are 18 or be willing to have a very amicable divorce where the kids are still put first until they are adults.

@@sortathesame8701 Nope, the studies stay having HAPPILY married parents does the most benefit to children. Parents that are together but clearly disrespect/hate each other are considerably worse for children than parents that are (amicably) divorced but happy.

Maybe ..however ...Dave is just talking to HER ....not BOTH of them ....

That is possible. She is so focused on the financial end of this picture; I would be wondering why my spouse is treating me like a disposable unit.

This lady is completely delusional and very arrogant, you can hear it in her voice. These two are trying to get through to her and she’s like a robot. I have a feeling she doesn’t respect her husband one bit and he sees an opportunity to leave her while he disguises it as “the debt-free option.”

I think she's a capricorn - very stubborn - always right - very much in her head and has no clue what it means to have emotional needs.

Projection? Her answers are completely rational

@BubonicTonic I am just thinking abt their little 7 year old daughter, such a shame

@BubonicTonic yeah he is going to divorce her, he has been frustrated for awhile. She needs to stay and work because he’s going to divorce her either way

completely agree, i was in same shoes. my ex wife decided to go the strong independent woman route. we parted ways, im happiest than ever, my career went up like tenfold, and life became a Buddhist's peaceful utopia.

@@Asmodeius that's gives guys like me hope. Wish you all the best bro

Can't really say that he is running. It's not about money, it's about her perceived security and getting things her way. Got a bit of princess in her.

Dude....maybe your dad wanted to retire in Argentina....MAYBE THATS ALL IT WAS lol

@@Macheako lol they werent gonna retire in their late 20s.

@Full Tilt Boogie Yes, to call your own wife a "puta" would mean you want the best for her and to just "retire". What Dave is saying is true, he just wants to leave HER but its a convenient out to say "I gave her the option to move with me and she didnt want to".

Ahh, Chattanooga isn’t Argentina. This couple is extremely disconnected. That’s why John and Dave focused on they need counseling before they can fix the living choices. It could be he is running off without regard to her, but it could also be that he had tried to get through to her about their problems and she has been unwilling to hear. Sometimes a relationship requires an ultimatum to continue or break when ending an unhealthy pattern is needed, no matter the cost.

Could be. But also consider that they may be paying a mortgage in Atlanta. And probably a high one at that. Why not move into the house that they can live in for free in Tennessee and pay no mortgage? Having no mortgage would expedite the process of getting out of debt. So yes they could potentially still live in Atlanta but likely at a high cost. I think the husband is just debt focused like she said. I would love to hear the other side of the story though, that would help put things into perspective. Either way there is something up with him being just willing to leave his wife behind like that.

on the outside looking in!!!!

John Maloney is a councillor, not a financial advisor. Dave covers that stuff. It’s a great combination!

Thank God he added Dr. Deloney to his Team!!

I think a lot of people dont want advise, they want approval on their bad behavior.

That's like his whole thing, the financial problems begin with emotional and relationship problems. I love how he comes at everything from a human level.

@@racebannon96yep

Money is a BIG part of all relationships; It shows you where your heart is and where you spend your money or save your money, your heart is.

He got what he thought he wanted but the grass is rarely greener

Can't imagine what happened to cause him to do that. Oh wait I can, most likely a whole marriage worth of infidelity

Yes, that is her side of the story. I’d love to hear his side.

@drmasroberts he did paternity tests on his last 2 kids. WHEN would a constantly pregnant homeschool mother of 7 or 8 find time to cheat? Of course they were his. He is a freaking psycho and has made it his mission to make her life as miserable as possible, using their kids as pawns. He had absolutely no interest in having anything to do with his kids until he found out she was dating, so he swooped back in to pretend to be super dad. Their 20yo has had 2 liver transplants. The dad told him if he moved in with his mom, he wouldn't pay for his life sustaining medication anymore. I've heard plenty of stories about awful women too, but this one was definitely an awful man.

Market not crashing for the rest of your life.

Borj Did you foresee corona happening? No? Then you can’t say anything like that again and be correct.

@@boertje It will definitely come again at some point a crash

feel bad for her

@@boertje markets are consolidating over the next few months. Expect another dip before it continues upward.

Hit the road, Jack!

And passing the guilt onto her, instead of taking the responsibility for an ended marriage on himself.

Or it’s like Dave and John said. He’s done screaming trying to fix things. It may not be him that’s the problem.

@@BlueDauntlessOh it’s him He has a side piece for sure

They both saw this coming 100 miles away (parents eventually passing). He either never expressed his thoughts (unlikely.....as a spouse would ask this), or she doesn't listen.

LOL🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

She's in denial, she probably also doesn't love him that deeply, it's hard to have a deep relationship with someone that checked out. She's probably struggling with letting go of a 10 year relationship she's comfortable with. She shouldn't leave her friends and career for someone that could care less. Even if she goes they will be divorcing in a few years.

@@jessicaolson490 He is the one with the upper hand in their years and will just continue to go up.

The financial windfall he had gave him to motivation to leave her. So sad!

Maybe she was chasing money for her CHILD

@@georgewagner7787If they’re both working and have one kid, I doubt it.

The child is probably in school and daycare with both of them working.

Exactly Granny always use to say where ever you go "There You are "

..."no matter where you go...there you are"... ..."you can't leave you at home"...

Yes, but for which one?

@Johnny Five she puts herself above her family.

It depends on what kind of job she has. Does it seems secure? What's her salary? How's the work environment?

@@rayj.9568 shes a contractor. She works gig by gig. She is actively looking for new work.

yeah. i think something is missing. she is a contractor. i mean...they can live debt free and from the rental properties, I would go in a heart beat. i don't know..

I think you all may have missed that a big part of her reluctance to move is being 100 miles from family and friends ... that’s a big change and has nothing to do with “feminism”

Anne Day He wasn’t abusive until after I decided to go through with the divorce. He was used to getting his way for so long. He thought it was unfair that I no longer had to work two jobs or overtime to support his lifestyle. He liked spending money on cars, parties, other women, the latest phones, and vacations. I’m sure it was a shock to the system when the divorce was finalized that triggered the threats.

aprilracine Kudo to you girl!!!

Kudos lady

ABSOLUTELY AWESOME!! I CAN'T clap enough!!👏👏👏👏There is NOTHING like peace of mind COMBINED with a plan. We can ALL be winners at life.👍

I’ve never heard Dave say to throw this ultimatum at a spouse. It’s always been talk with them because their vote is just as important as yours.

good point, I think you might be right

the only thing a woman loves more than her husband and a free and easy lifestyle is her boyfriend

Nailed it.

I don’t blame her! How can u give your wife an ultimatum

@@kazzTrismusnot necessarily, what he’s doing isn’t a safe idea, I understand him wanting to get out of debt so sell some of the properties and pay off debt

So sad that many couples do that.

It's a marriage, not a business partnership, if a wife will not obey her husband it's effectively over.

Exactly, it’s bad way of communication, unless they want to leave

They do when one of them doesnt care anymore

@@costakeith9048 I don't know what century you're lost in, but obeying is not the same thing as submission. Read your Bible. Partners don't give each other ultimatums.

She’s got it together and likes her life no one can blame her for that….its hard to compete with feeling safe

This is a defensive mechanism working unconsciously. She hides her fear behind calculation.

Completely in denial

Yes

Exactly! And i bet she knows it. If they were in a happy marriage, he wouldn't be giving her an 'ultimatum' and she wouldn't be so nervous to start on this new adventure with him.

Maybe she’s got a different plan and she can sense a divorce in the future.

@Anne Day She should stay behind for all of what you said Anne.

Paid for house doesn’t include electric, water etc…and the man doesn’t have a job he just has 4 rental properties and on his back

He doesn't need to move to another state -- he can just sell one of the properties and have all his debts taken care of.

The fact that he's giving her an option to stay raises eyebrows because they are married. To me it sounds like he's trying to get rid of her.

Friend Friends Yeah it would definitely be interesting to hear his side of the story too. I have a feeling we’re missing some details.

There are 5 inherited properties, he wants a divorce. Inherited properties are not marriage assets to divide. He just won the divorce lottery, just give her the GA home.

@@friendfriends2444 It's possible that he told her let's move to TN and she refused. And he told her again that he wants to move to TN and she kept refusing. Then eventually he said, I'm giving you an ultimatum. I'm going to TN, either you come or stay it's upto to you.

@@farzana6676 I have a friend who did the same thing with his wife but he moved to Florida. She chose her adult daughter over her marriage and he left her. He's living his best life now.

🤭😂😂😂😂

LOL

Maybe she’s cheating.

Me, too.

For curiosity?

@SSSWLAFAAFCYeah112 5 properties could be worth $100k or $1M. You don't know that so you can't make assumptions about worth and the impact on the decision. While your assumptions about her are a possibility, the reverse could be just as true. He issued the ultimatum and could be planning the divorce. I agree with FitTruckingGamer, and I would love to hear his side because there was too much missing from hers.

100% He May have been trying to communicate to her what the plan needed to be for a long time, but she is married to her career, not him. She’s fine with a HCOL area and $40K in student loans- no mention of or question about who is raising their 7 year old while she advances her career? He has an opportunity to provide for his family- debt-free and her resistance to that is selfish. Her career is just not that important, but it is her idol that she worships. Her whole identity is her career- she went into debt for it. She’s willing to stay in debt for it. She has totally abandoned her identity as a wife and a mother- and that’s if she ever had it in the first place. They could has pressed her a LOT more on that point. Who do you want to be? A whatever it is you do for a living? Or a wife to your husband and a mother to your 7 year old girl? I know who they need her to be- and the reason he’s willing to let her go is that she long ago abandoned her family.

Maybe she puts more stock in her HCOL Atlanta lifestyle and her career than being a wife and a mother. Perhaps he’s willing to let her go because she long ago abandoned him? Maybe she just hasn’t been paying attention? She seems to have an idol: her career. She’s got $40K plus in debt and a seven year old daughter- does this strike anyone as incongruent?

@@paulstrauss9146 sadly I agree. this is really sad and 10 years still at 40k in debt, what happens when he leaves she will be stuck in debt for ever.

I think you are spot on.

Yep.

Yep.

She kept saying "my career, my options, my this my that" Imagine the poor guy hearing it all day long.

my xw tried that.. she is now me xw

That's not the point. The point is the ultimatum and how he proposed it; that's a sign of a bad marriage. Edit: I do agree with you, though. If the marriage is good, then it's a super good opportunity.

@@Questioneverythingx She could be lying about the style of the ultimatum. We only have her side of the story.

@@YadraVoat That is true. Either way they in bad shape

+1 I think she might be mischaracterizing the nature of his ultimatum.

The problem is that if she doesn't have a job in the new place and he wanders out of the marriage, which he probably will given the fact he's giving an ultimatum, she won't have anything to fall back on. If he gets a good lawyer he can leave her with nothing, and her career will be over, as well.

Thank you!!! They are a family! They need to act like adults and make the best decision for the family. They are putting their personal desires over their child.

You don't stay in bad relationships for the kids. You leave for the kids! Don't damage them by having them watch you suffer and be unhappy for years!

Once a person starts noticing children being disregarded, they are surprised at how often it happens. Makes me so mad. But they will be very quick to say "my kids are my world", but actions speak much louder than words.

@@rachellebrown9830 I thought that, but it turns out that many people don't think so. I left a terrible marriage, he was a terrible father, too (he wouldn't even answer if his kids called him "Dad"; they had to call him by his first name. And yes, they look exactly like him in case anyone wonders.). However, my friends and several family members told me that the kids would never forgive me, and that I was scarring them for life!

I KNOW HES LEAVING HER AND THE KID

No one just wakes up one day and say to themselves "I think I'm going to tell the love of my life that I'm moving and that they can come if they want, or don't." Something has happened and this guy is done trying to fix it himself while she buries her head in the sand.

@@jwebby85 true!

@@jwebby85 ??? 10 years ago, I told my wife, in ten years, I will retire, I am going to move. It is more important to me to leave this Sh**hole, than anything else. My wife said to me :in ten years, I will retire, I am going to move. It is more important to me to leave this Sh**hole, than anything else. I bet, if she was retired, she would still want to live in Atlanta.

She's in a panic, poor woman. She's not thinking rationally at this point.

3 sides when the truth comes out

There "are" always two sides...grammar please.

Dianna Thornton that’s how I choose to write

@@bigd3721 that's very basic correct grammar.

You don’t get the real issue here. She said my this my that just because she needs some excuses to confirm for herself that she can’t go with him because of her situations, not because her husband doesn’t want her anymore.

true, this is what our egocentric society is going for.

She could be teaching her child to tolerate being treated as a lesser person if she stays.

But it's OK to force him to stay where you want, regardless of what he may want?

She's in a panic, desperately trying to drown the voice of her fears with that inane chatter about money and strategy.

Number 1!!

Good point

how do we know he's an abuser?

This statement obviously written by a woman. How do we know there’s abuse and he’s the abuser?

Bingo! Idk how she didn’t see the bigger picture! They need Counseling.

Exactly.

Yup

True enough

But you don't know what it is she could of made a big deal are fight over it who knows

Always two sides to every story! I'm sure she's a saint!

haha I don't think he's very eloquent and he jumps to conclusions way too quickly

Too many women are married more to their careers than their spouses.

That’s it, this guy doesn’t feel heard.

The marriage is broken....all inherited properties are assuredly put in his name...she leaves Atlanta & her earning power....she’s burdened with $42K debt in her name....moves with her child to Tennessee....will probably be employed by husband helping with his real estate management....more fights ensue shortly after move...he files for divorce & gets child custody...she now has no job & is $42K debt....he buys her single bus ticket back to Atlanta...The End.

@@boatsie I'm sorry you have little faith in people but everyone is not the person that hurt you

Exactly, Imam.

I hadn't thought of that possibility, interesting!

She is a control freak. She can't let her husband be the leader of the family

Brian G C seen too many failed relationships because of this. And secretly the women despise their partner for being puppies like that. It’s simply unbalanced.

interesting take.

@@pspspsp1010 Yeah why whatever woman I end up choosing to be my wife is never going to be a control-freak. A woman that lets her man lead will be happier for it, and the man too. A woman trying to lead causes her to be unhappy/unsatisfied and the same goes for the man. Only one partner can lead, and when women do it the relationship suffers. Also, when I say lead I don't mean dominate. There's always discussion/compromise as a couple/unit, but ultimately ONE decision is made, so naturally someone takes the lead.

Oh my goodness I could not even imagine. I hope you are doing well!❤️

I think it's waaaayyy too late for that! He's already checked out of the marriage. He probably already has her replacement lined up. He expects her to take the big ole hint. That was a real bucket of ice water he poured over her; she's trying very hard to pretend otherwise.

Had owned Their cars Grammar & spelling matters wherever you are

Remember, it is what she said he said. We really have no idea what he said.

This is the first take I’ve seen where people had criticisms of the wife that actually makes any amount of sense. Most people are just saying “submit to your husband!!” and, “she just loves her job more than her husband!!” as if it’s somehow reasonable to propose an ultimatum like that out of nowhere 💀 But if this is the case and the husband has finally had enough of being steamrolled by his wife, then yeah. I don’t blame him. But John and Dave are totally right. They need to find a marriage counselor or something before they make any other decisions.

Me either...

🤢🤢

Ugh..